All language subtitles for The.First.Date.2017.HDRip.XviD.AC3-EVO

- Hi, my name is Emma.

I am looking for a very
special person in my life.

I've been through it all.

I've been dating for way too long.

I've been with men and women.

Tried that, didn't work out,

so I'm done playing the dating game.

I just want someone who
is going to be the perfect

person for me.

I'm not getting any younger.

I just want happiness, and

loved to have a family.

So I am just giving this another shot,

and I'm hoping that special
person is out there for me

so we can make each other happy

and give each other good lives.

- Tada.
- Wow.

This place is actually nice.

I won't lie, I was
afraid that you might've

brought me here just to
take me to your place.

- Don't worry about it.

Now I know what a big film buff you are.

- Horror film buff.
- Yes, horror film buff.

And I thought you'd like my home theater,

and I've got a great
collection of short films.

- Oh, nice.

Well just so you know, I don't normally

do this on the first date.

But, you know, there's
something about you I trust.

You wouldn't believe the
kind of dates I've been on

through that dating site,
so I appreciate this.

- I'm glad I don't disappoint.

Tell you what, why don't you have a seat,

I'm gonna grab us some popcorn.

- Thank you.

Thank you.

So what do we got up first?

- Oh, I figured to start,

we'll do something a little lighter,

a little g-rated family affair.

- Hm.

Nice.
- Yeah.

- Welcome, boys and girls,

to this week's episode of
Miss Catanic's Reading Room

where you tell you to open a book.

What have you got to lose
other than your soul?

If you're following along at home,

this week we're reading Doll Hands.

And remember, when you hear this tone:

turn the page.

- There was a little girl

named Samantha McKray.

She hated the rules so she ran away.

There was a little doll
named Pretty Miss Beth.

She had pretty blue eyes
and a faint smell of death.

Samantha had no idea where to go,

she just wanted a place
to get out of the snow.

Then she saw a building
that came into view.

It looked really creepy,
but what else could she do?

It had a roof made of wood
and walls make of bricks.

It seemed like a place
where junkies get their fix.

Samantha wanted to take
a quick look around.

Beer cans, condoms and
needles littered the ground.

Just as she was ready to
leave the way she came,

Samantha heard a faint
voice calling her name.

That's when she found her,
that little Miss Beth,

with her pretty blue eyes
and her faint smell of death.

"Please play with me," she said,

"and I'll keep you safe.

"I can be your best friend,
we can live in this place."

They had a tea party
like princesses planned,

ignoring that her cup
was just an old beer can.

They played hide and go seek,
which Samantha always won.

McKray's world had no
rules, now only good fun.

Samantha ran down the
hall and into the light.

The sun on her face
just didn't feel right.

The cement pipes were used by those two

for a wonderful game of peekaboo.

But now Samantha felt
strange; something's wrong.

The poltimous Beth was
a little too strong.

Her skin became pale,
her brain began to hurt.

Was this being caused by
the doll in the skirt?

Samantha thought the only
way to stop feeling sick

was to smash Little Miss
Beth's face with a brick.

Samantha ran away from
home and look what it cost.

She has no rules, but
her soul is now lost.

Now she lives in this place,
surrounded by disrepair.

Her hair is all matted
and her skin is so fair.

She hopes to find a new friend to play,

maybe a nice girl who just ran away.

Maybe it's you, you can go there and see.

Or maybe you will see
her and have to flee.

There was a little girl
named Samantha McKray.

She hated the rules so she ran away.

There was a little doll
named Little Miss Beth.

She had pretty blue eyes
and a faint smell of death.

- Hm?

Wasn't that kind of dark for children?

Do you think that was appropriate?

- Shouldn't children be made aware of

the darkness that's in
the world around them?

You know, maybe if we exposed
them more stuff like this,

it'll prepare them for
what is in store for them.

- Okay, but you're not
teaching them stranger danger,

just say no to drugs.

I mean, what kind of
lesson is practical here?

I mean, how often do you see
someone turn into a doll?

- Think of it more of a cautionary tale,

you know, like the Grimm
Brothers used to do

but with a modern twist.

It's funny how many of our modern fears

stem from childhood issues.

You know, like clowns and dolls.

- You know, I've never
been afraid of clowns.

- You've just never met the right one.

- Hey, dude.

There's a new haunted
house attraction in town.

It's only like 10 bucks
a head. Do you wanna go?

- I don't believe in ghosts, dude.

- Well, you don't have
to believe in ghosts

to enjoy a haunted house.

- Kinda do.

- Yeah, you kinda fuckin' don't.

You're playing a fuckin' game right now

where you're shooting a
bunch of fuckin' aliens--

- But I'm not like you
where I think the aliens

are real and gonna come
out of the TV or something,

like all your conspiracy
theories and stuff.

- Oh my God.

Just because it's proven by the government

that chem trails are
real, doesn't fuckin' mean

that aliens are real.

- I do not want to go to
this stupid haunted house.

Oh my God. Whatever, man.

Do you wanna hear something
that's actually scary?

- Sure.

- Alright, so the story goes
is that there's this clown,

his name is Socko, Socko the Clown.

So Socko was born Nathan Sins.

Nathan was bullied in school.

He would go home and his parents would

never notice he's around.

One year they hired a birthday
clown for his birthday,

and since no one else
showed up, the clown was

the only one to spend the birthday with.

From that point, Nathan
knew what he wanted to be.

He was going to be a
party clown and bring joy

to all the children who had
no other joy in their life.

After waiting his entire life,

he finally got his first clown job.

He was Socko.

The parents that hired him didn't realize

that the 12-year-old
child that his friends

were way to old for a birthday clown.

So Socko was best to
entertain these preteens,

and they were having none of it.

And they are throwing things at him

and calling him all kinds
of named like douche

and greasy pervert.

And one of the kids yells
out Sucko the Clown.

All the other kids pick up on it.

So the next think you
know, they're chanting

"Sucko, Sucko, Sucko!"

Socko was devastated
by this and walks away

to the other room

where he finds the
parents' liquor cabinet.

He just starts downing
whiskey like it's his job,

and then stumbles into his clown car

and tries to drive home.

On his way home, he crashes
head into a bridge.

When the story hit the
news, the anchors were

unable to keep a straight face,

and the entire incident went viral.

Even the fact that he died in an accident

didn't stop people from making fun of him.

Then on the anniversary of his death,

a teenager was found brutally
murdered in his bathroom.

The teenager's friend said
they were looking in the mirror

and said Sucko the Clown three times.

The next thing they knew, Socko was there

with a knife and killed his friend.

To this day, if you look into a mirror

and say Sucko the Clown three times,

he'll show up and take his revenge.

- You do not actually believe that.

- I swear to God. I--

- You believe that if you go in the mirror

and say his name three
times, he'll show up?

- Fuckin' yes, dude.

Alright, dude, oh I'll tell you what,

I will get off your back about going,

leaving the house,
putting down your fuckin'

space marine video game bullshit--

- Oh my god.

- And going to the haunted house

if you go and do this with me
right now in your bathroom.

- So if I go in there and
I say his name three times,

and he doesn't show up,

like literally he does not show up,

no lights flickering or any
of that wind-blowing nonsense

like last time, then I don't have to go

to this haunted house?

- Swear, I swear.

- Alright.

- Alright, let's do it.

- So just say Sucko the Clown
in the mirror three times?

- Yeah, dude, if you're not scared.

- It's stupid.

- If it's so stupid, just fuckin' do it.

- I'm not scared either.

Alright, c'mon. Prove it.

- Sucko the Clown...

Sucko the Clown, Sucko the Clown.

Oh God!

- It's Socko.

It's fuckin' Socko.

- That was interesting.

- You know, most people see
the clown as the villain,

but wasn't he really the victim here?

First society, then his parents,

and then the children
he wanted nothing more

than to entertain.

Now he's forced into an
existence where he has to

show up whenever beckoned.

- I guess I didn't see it that way.

Hm. What a tragedy.

Well I don't suppose you
have any horror/love stories.

- I do have a story, I do
have a beautiful story,

about love that can't be stopped.

♫ Marty Love is a loser

♫ Everything goes wrong in his life

♫ His apartment's trashed

♫ He's always about to crash

♫ Nowhere near having a wife

♫ It's vodka and coffee in the morning

♫ Whatever it takes to
get him through the day

♫ He drags his bag out the door

♫ To work another 8 to 4

♫ It's like he's living his life away

♫ Find a note when he
gets back that evening

♫ With a gift he didn't plan on receiving

♫ Someone named Rose knows what he needs

♫ His heart keeps beating as he reads

♫ Sometimes the reason we feel so lonely

♫ In this life is 'cause we haven't found

♫ The other half of our soul now

♫ So give this record a spin around

♫ As the record turns,
the ghost of Rose appears

♫ Swaying to the music like
it's all that she can hear

♫ Each move seduces Marty
like she's melting eyes

♫ She motions to the bedroom
but he doesn't think twice

♫ Marty wakes the next morning

♫ Seizes the day like a different man

♫ His apartment's clean

♫ Feel so pristine

♫ Now that he has Rose who understands

♫ Breakfast is on the table waiting

♫ The windows open, fan in the breeze

♫ His life feels less like reality

♫ And he thinks, oh this is fine with me

♫ 'Cause I am finally living the dream

♫ You saw him finally living the dream

♫ Marty heads to work and on his way home

♫ He stops to celebrate this life he owns

♫ Bumps into his friend as she walks in

♫ So they catch up about
how things have been

♫ He things of Rose as he grabs his plate

♫ Feels a little guilty
for making her wait

♫ I hope she won't mind that he'll be late

♫ But Rose got worried
when he didn't show up

♫ So she went out looking,
looking for her love

♫ But when Rose saw them there

♫ She could just fume and stare

♫ How could that bastard
dare to fuck this all up

♫ When Marty gets home,
his place is a mess

♫ It's covered in
notes with angry threats

♫ The record is spinning, it's
playing that same old song

♫ He sees Rose crying
like a woman done wrong

♫ Her eyes glare

♫ Her eyes burn

♫ As that record turned

♫ As Marty looks around, he sees the thorn

♫ Of a woman scorned

♫ She's crying, she's
lying, she's trying to

♫ Get him cornered

♫ She feels bad for what she did

♫ Wants to make it up with love to him

♫ But all that Marty can say is no

♫ No, Rose, no

♫ He decides to destroy the record

♫ Let this new life drop

♫ So the maniacal musical madness

♫ Will finally stop

♫ There is peace for a moment

♫ But Rose flies back like a hornet

♫ Menacing, with a knife in the air

♫ Marty runs for his life but
breaks his neck right there

♫ Marty rises from his resting place

♫ To see an old familiar sin

♫ A past life with his Rose

♫ For they

♫ Red wine in cold

♫ As dying together

♫ Seems so much better

♫ Yet dying together

♫ Seems so much better, oh

♫ Living alone

- That was so beautiful.

I mean, they had a love that
even death couldn't stop.

You know, sometimes,

a love can be too strong.

When that happens, it
becomes an obsession.

And that is a special kind of love.

I started coming here

after the accident.

If I couldn't hear the beauty
this world had to offer,

at least I could see it.

I spent my days walking through this park

enjoying the silence.

It took a while getting
used to my sound-proof

cage of deafness.

Months of counseling and recovery

stretched on for what
seemed like an eternity.

Sign language and lip
reading were little comforts

within depression's cruel embrace.

That's when she entered my world.

I noticed her in passing at first.

But soon I started looking forward

to when she'd come in my room.

She was an aide,

helping to change my bandages and linens.

It was because of her that
my eternity became bearable.

I could no longer hear, but
her smile was a symphony.

And her touch would make
a chorus of angels weep.

Sent home, I felt my loss anew.

It was like living in
the depths of the earth.

No sound, no light without her.

The hospital released me,

but my heart would remain forever hers.

She was my savior, my goddess,

and every goddess needs her shrine.

Perhaps one day she will see
it, and she will love me.

I have gone to thank her,

to tell her what she means to me.

I've approached the hospital,

but like a frightened rabbit,
I ran before she saw me.

What kind of weirdo stalks someone?

I followed her here.

She likes to come here
everyday after work.

It's not stalking if we visit
the same public park, is it?

I've seen her in the
months since coming here,

always from the shadows.

I can't have her spot me yet.

Would she even recognize me, though?

Her kindness radiates through her

like the warmth of the sun.

As she passes, I see men turn and leer,

their filthy intentions
plain on their faces.

She greets them all
with a wave and a smile,

oblivious to their intended cruelty.

She's too pure, a goddess
made into porcelain flesh.

One wrong move and she'll be broken.

I can't let that happen.

She will thank me. She
will be happy with me.

I can treat her the way she needs,

the way she deserves.

That is why I must do this today.

Even now as I follow her, I
feel the darkness receding,

going back into a long-forgotten
portion of my mind.

I have to be careful, take my time,

choose the right moment to grab her.

This might be the opportunity that I need.

The tunnels under this
bridge are pretty secluded.

What is she taking out of the,

oh no, did she see me?

I have to act now.

- I wouldn't consider that love.

He tried to kidnap her.

- He was misguided on how to show it,

but it was still love.

- If you say so.

- It was just, it just
consumed him, is all,

and then so did the
creature in the forest.

You know, many people
think that love is just

a chemical reaction in your brain.

The same chemical reaction that makes you

question everything that
you thought was once life.

Now, I myself think that the loss of love

that was once there is the
most tragic story of all.

- Aw.

- This
is the day I've been

dreaming about, living off the grid

from all the hatred and insanity

that this world seems to have embraced.

The only thing that makes
this day better than my dreams

is that I'm here with
the woman that I love.

Together, we can start
our lives on our terms,

not what was dictated by society.

- Day one.

Scott asked me to keep a journal so we

can document our new lives together.

I think that this is
the best thing for us.

I love how clean everything is out here.

I'll miss the smell of
cheerios that the city had,

but I won't miss having
to fill water pitchers

just to have clean water.

The spring is so crisp and clean here.

Day five.

I'm surprised at how little
I miss about our old lives.

There are times I do miss
our friends and family,

but I'm comforted in knowing that I can go

and visit them whenever I want.

Scott told me that I should wait until

we've been here for a while
before we invite anyone over,

just to make sure we're
acclimating to our new lives.

- Day ten.
We walked our land today.

I can tell Linda misses some
aspects of our old life.

I wish there was more that I could do

to help her forget all
that we left behind.

Our old lives brought us nothing but pain.

I would give anything to make sure

she never feels that pain again.

She needs to realize that I am the only

family she has now.

- Day 23.

I don't understand why Scott is so adamant

about me not visiting my family.

Today he told me the weather
wasn't good for travel.

I know my parents
weren't his biggest fans,

but they came around.

How will they ever make it up to him

if he refuses to see them?

Day 27.

I think this isolation is getting to me.

Last night when I looked out the window,

I saw something in the wood line.

Some kind of entity out there,

just far enough away that I couldn't tell

exactly what it is.

I would tell Scott but he
seems annoyed with me lately,

and I don't want him thinking I'm crazy.

- Day 27.

I think it is time I told Linda the truth.

I have tried to let her work
it all out on her own time.

I thought by now she would have accepted

that I am all she has left.

She refuses to let go of the past

and embrace what her life is now.

She seems to be getting worse.

Last night, she got spooked by
something outside the window.

I asked her what she saw, but
she told me it was nothing.

- Day 40.

I know now that this was a mistake.

Scott brought me out here,
took me away from my parents,

the only people who loved me.

I have to be strong and
find a way to escape.

I've realized what the entity
was that I saw the other day.

It's clearly Scott's accomplice.

I see that thing every night now

patrolling the area.

It's there to make sure
I can't leave Scott.

That's why, when I told him what I saw,

he told me he didn't see anything.

I've stopped letting
him know when I see it.

I can't let him know that I know.

Day 45.

I've begun hoarding away food.

Once I think I have enough
supplies to make my escape,

I'll do so.

Scott's watchdog, the
thing out in the woods,

it's been getting braver.

Every time I see it now, it's come closer.

They must have such a
low perception of me.

They think I'm too weak to fight back.

That I'm too stupid to
see what's happening.

- Day 50.

I am worried about Linda.

She has been acting so distant.

I hope she realizes how much I love her

and how all of this is for her.

I found a bag filled with food today

that she had been hiding.

When I asked her about
it, she had a meltdown.

She kept saying something
about me and my friend.

I think she's had a break.

Maybe it's time I told her the truth.

It has to be better than this.

- Day 52.

It's becoming more and more difficult

to act like everything's okay,

to go about such mundane,
day-to-day routines.

I think Scott knows I plan on escaping.

He won't be able to stop me.

I need to escape.

It has to happen. I
can't take this anymore.

Day 55.

Scott found my escape bag.

He's now getting so
desperate to keep me here.

He told me that my parents are dead,

that they died in an accident.

I told him I'm not stupid.

I would remember that.

He said it was a mental breakdown.

According to him, my doctor told him

that moving out here would help me.

That he should let me work it out myself.

I am not crazy. He wants
me to doubt myself.

I will not be controlled. Tonight I leave.

His friend is getting too
close, it's tonight or never.

- Agent Bidwater,

government.

The experiment was a success.

Adding the agent to the water supply

increased paranoia in the residents

turning them against each other.

I was able to attain all
the information necessary

to begin using the agent
against foreign governments.

A cleanup team has been dispatched

to round up the female
and destroy all evidence.

When we win the war,

they will be the first unsung heroes,

like the first monkeys shot into space.

They will usher in a new era.

- That is so sad.

They thought they could
escape the world and run away

and be in love.

You know what, I don't think I can watch

anymore love stories.

- Okay. We could switch gears.

How about a classic superhero tale?

Hey, have you ever
heard of Johnny Justice?

- No. Who's that?

- He was my favorite superhero
when I was growing up.

Yeah, I had a huge collection
of his memorabilia.

And this is my favorite
episode of the show.

- There
he is, Johnny Justice.

Saving the world, protecting puppies,

helping innocent babies,

all so he can sign a few autographs.

Well now it's time to help
me out, Johnny Justice,

you arrogant son of a bitch.

You're gonna help me home,

and I don't think you're gonna like

what it takes for me to
go home, are ya, Johnny?

- Remember, ladies, you can
take justice in your own hands.

- Last we
left our valiant hero,

he was in the clutches of the foul fiend,

Doctor Devastation.

How will our helpless hero
escape this perilous predicament?

- You will not get away with
this, Doctor Devastation.

We both know how this will end.

- My name is Kevin.
- What?

- My name is Kevin.

You know, I saved you for last

because you retired and I didn't
think I'd have to kill you.

But obviously I need to
kill you to make it stop.

- You don't win this, Devastation.

I am the, what the fuck!

I'm the hero, I'm
supposed to win, not you!

- I need you to listen, I
need you to focus on my words,

'cause I'm not a bad guy.

I just, this is not my fault.

What I do, I do because I have to.

My name's Kevin, Kevin Wallace.

You know, I'm not from this world.

The world I'm from, heroes and villains,

they're not real, they're TV shows.

I grew up watching the
Johnny Justice Power Hour.

Hell, one year, I was you for Halloween.

I lived in a world where I was a doctor.

I had a wife and a
child, and then one day,

I wake up and I'm here.

I can hear narrators speaking about every

little mundane thing that you do.

I can see the cameras and the lights

that you guys are oblivious to.

You live in your life
of blissful ignorance,

and I'm being driven insane.

And then one day, the voice talks to me,

and he tells me all I
have to do to go home

is kill every one of you heroes.

You're the last one, Johnny.

You're my ticket home.

- Will Johnny
escape this dungeon of doom?

Stay tuned, kids.

We will find out after this
brief message from our sponsor.

- Not now!

- Hello, and thanks for joining
us, the September Brothers,

for a quick public service announcement,

and we'll get you back momentarily

to the Johnny Justice Power Hour.

- You may have recognized us
from the award-winning short,

The Shamlin Shack.
- Shamlin Shack.

- One of the best-reviewed zombie shorts

ever put to film.
- Ever.

Amazing it was.

And that brings us to what
we're hoping to reach to.

There's a group of people in this world

that need your help,
they need your support.

They're independent filmmakers.

You see, big Hollywood
budgets are everywhere,

and none of them were given
to these amazing talents

that can bring you such awesome
films as The First Date,

patent pending, first date
based on a true story.

But, I mean,

they're living there with microbudgets,

I mean, a couple dollars and that's it.

They've tried to bring you entertainment.

- Microbudgets.

- But you can help.

You can support your local
independent filmmakers,

and it can bring such
amazing things to you.

- Amazing.

- I just don't even know
how else to tell you guys

what you can do for this community.

- It could be handing
them cash right there,

firm handshake and a pat on the ass--

- And then more money.
- Accept that.

- Support these local filmmakers.

Do your part, do your part.

It's important to bring the arts

and entertainment home

and only you can do it.

For just pennies a day,

a lot of pennies a day,

like thousands and
thousands of pennies a day.

You know, a couple of thousand
dollars a day, if you would,

just you too can support it.

And we'll,

when you do this when
you make this donation,

when you make this pledge,

you can get sent, you know, a picture

of the director that you're supporting,

you know, a letter, a lovely
handwritten letter from him.

Probably gonna be a lot
of swearing in there

because we cuss like sailors.

We're a hardy bunch.

- Like if the only thing
the letter says to us

says send nudes, sending nudes.

- That might be what it says.

- I'm about sending nudes.
- Sending the nudes.

Alright, I guess, back to your show.

- You don't even notice that, do you?

My life freezes for two minutes at a time

for these fucking commercials, and you,

you don't even notice.

They were a pain in my world
having to sit through them,

but here, it's worse.

You don't understand the pain,

that's why I have to do this.

That's why I have no
choice but to kill you.

- Commercials, voices? What are you crazy?

We have medications here for that.

I don't, I don't understand.

I don't hear any of that.

You don't have to do any of this.

- I do. I do have to do this.

It's the only way.

- I'm
not even a hero anymore.

I retired a long time ago after I defeated

my arch nemesis, The Masturbator.

- No flashbacks!

I don't have the time.

This has to end now.

I'm so tired of hearing the voices.

I'm sick of being the only person

in this miserable planet
that sees past the veil.

- That's all
the time we have this week,

boys and girls.

Tune in next week to see our--
- No!

This ends now!

Finally.

Finally done.

No more narrators, no more voices.

Where is the door?

Where's my way home?

I don't get it. I did everything.

Everything that I was supposed to.

I killed all those people for this,

for my way home.

What if, what if I am crazy?

What if it's all in my head?

Is that it? Am I crazy?

Am I just a killer?

Am I just a monster?

I'm not crazy, what if,
what if I'm just a killer?!

- Wait, wait.

Your work isn't done.

- Yes, it is. He was the last.

- I brought
you into this world.

I saw the potential for violence in you

and needed your help to
end this scourge of heroes.

Yes, he is the last one for now.

But there will be more.

Someone will take their place.

Then you can teach them
the lesson as well.

In the meantime, you can rule this world.

You could be their god, and I your boss.

- No.

I'm done with this. I'm not your pawn.

- Yes, you are.

Make no mistake, you have been
my pawn for a long time now.

All you have to do is sit
back and enjoy the spoils.

- No, this, this ends now.

- It ends when I release you

from your miserable...

Well, fuck.

- So I'm guessing that was the
final episode of that show?

- Actually, no, this
was an unaired episode.

- Oh.
- I've been lucky enough to

obtain a few rare
editions in my collection.

- Is that so?

- Yeah, as a matter of fact,
this next one is a classic.

- Okay, but when I think of classic,

I think of a bunch of people
stuck in a creepy house.

- Okay.

I think I have something that'll
play to your classic loves.

- Denizen Nefarious.

- Delta
Team has been contracted

out to head to the middle
of nowhere to steal

some weird object.

Normally we would not take
such a weird contract,

but under the circumstances,
the client was very persuasive.

Whatever the object, it was
very important to our client,

but that didn't matter to me.

All I cared about was the number
of zeroes on the contract.

I set off a couple of
hours to case the place

before my partner shows
up to finish the job.

The only information I
was given was the owner

of the house was a weird loner inventor

who, luckily, has not been seen for weeks.

Some people even think he died.

How easy that that?

Steal from a dead guy's barn.

Oh, how wrong we were.

- My
name is Jim Bluefield.

I am heading to meet my
partner, Kim Christmas,

in a middle of nowhere
town to steal some objects

of some sort.

I am leaving early because
normally my partner

would be sending me updates,

but I haven't heard from
her in a long while.

I will go in and lend a hand.

- That felt really familiar.

You know, I had a great time tonight.

I never thought I'd have such a good time

on a first date

coming from a dating website.

Thank you.

I really should get going though.

It's getting late, so--

- Okay, but I have one more
film I want you to watch.

- Okay.

What the hell? What am I watching?

What the fuck is going on?

Is this some kind of sick fucking joke?

What is going on?

Why do I feel this way?

- Looks like what I put in the popcorn

is finally kicking in.

You know, they always tell girls that they

should poor their own drinks,

but they never tell them
about things like popcorn.

Well, I guess now you know.

You see, I'm a collector of sorts.

Every film that you watched,

that's a soul that's in my collection.

Each one of them was
obsessed with something.

I mean, maybe it was a record, or science,

or going home, or some little trinket.

Their obsession called to me.

I can hear it.

And that call from their soul,

well that becomes my obsession.

- What does that have to do with me?

- Because you're obsessed too.

You're obsessed with
finding the perfect person.

You go out to all these clubs,

you go on dating sites,

you ask all of your friends to set you up

just to find the perfect person.

Oh, I can hear it.

Even now, you're
obsession cries out to me.

It drowns out everything
else in the world.

But no longer.

Because I am the perfect man for you.

I love you,

even for all your imperfections.

And I never plan to let you go.

Now, just one good night kiss

and I'll send you off
to join my menagerie.

♫ Whoa

♫ Whoa

♫ Whoa

♫ Oh now, I've seen your face before

♫ Yes, I know who you are

♫ I know what you're looking for

♫ But I best be on my way

♫ But forgive me for wanting to say

♫ You're a stranger

♫ I'm a stranger too

♫ So let's figure this out

♫ We'll be left with no doubt

♫ I'm in need of you

♫ Whoa

♫ Whoa

♫ I ain't even heard you say one word

♫ But I ain't got the time
and I ain't go the nerve

♫ And I could guarantee

♫ If we talk, all I'd hear was me

♫ You're a stranger

♫ I'm a stranger too

♫ So let's figure this out

♫ We'll be left with no doubt

♫ I'm in need of you

♫ Oh now, come with me

♫ Oh now, come with me

♫ We're all brothers and
sisters, workers and lovers

♫ Come with me

♫ Oh now, looking at all I see

♫ Wonder if I miss the marsh

♫ 'Cause shouldn't it be so easy

♫ To extend some welcoming arms

♫ Whoa, whoa

♫ You deserve all I see

♫ Whoa, whoa

♫ You and I share the same story

♫ Oh now, come with me

♫ Oh now, come with me

♫ We're all brothers and
sister, workers and lovers

♫ Come with me

♫ You're a stranger

♫ I'm a stranger too

♫ So let's figure this out

♫ We'll be left with no doubt

♫ That I'm in need of you

♫ Oh now, come with me

♫ Oh now, come with me

♫ We're all brothers and
sisters, workers and lovers

♫ Brothers and sisters, workers and lovers

♫ I'm your brother, your my sister

♫ I'm a worker, you're a lover

♫ Come with me

♫ Whoa

♫ Whoa

♫ Whoa

- Back a little.
- Back.

- Up, down, there.

- You are good.

- Got that skill crane.
- Alrighty.

- Action.

- That was a terrible kiss.