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1
00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:37,120
Abacus?
2
00:00:37,160 --> 00:00:38,960
(GUNSHOT)
3
00:00:42,480 --> 00:00:44,280
(BONE CRACKS) Argh!
4
00:00:45,080 --> 00:00:47,880
(FIRES TWICE)
5
00:00:51,160 --> 00:00:52,800
(FIRES)
6
00:00:56,560 --> 00:00:58,040
Argh!
7
00:00:59,640 --> 00:01:01,600
(GUNSHOT)
8
00:01:09,320 --> 00:01:11,280
Your... Ssh, ssh.
9
00:01:11,320 --> 00:01:15,400
You're OK. Shush, shush, now.
Take your time. Take your time.
10
00:01:15,440 --> 00:01:19,080
You got all the time in the world.
You got something to say, say it.
11
00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:21,960
Your...penis is hanging out.
12
00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:25,200
Oh! Is he? Is he really?
13
00:01:25,240 --> 00:01:27,160
Ah, he is. Oh, God.
14
00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:30,760
I'm... I'm...
I'm mortified right now.
15
00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:35,560
I'm test-driving a zip fly, and it's
taking some getting used to, buddy!
16
00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:37,880
Maybe put it away?
Oh, yeah! (LAUGHS)
17
00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:41,320
What's the point in keeping it out?!
(LAUGHS)
18
00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:44,960
Yeah. We just met, yeah?
Let me get him back. It's...
19
00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:47,920
I've known guys ten years
haven't seen my johnson.
20
00:01:47,960 --> 00:01:49,960
This was my meet.
21
00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:54,920
Gringori was...my asset, Logan.
22
00:01:54,960 --> 00:01:57,920
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
You know my name? You know me?
23
00:01:57,960 --> 00:02:00,960
I sit four desks away from you.
24
00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:07,080
(LAUGHS) What - at the office?
Agent 40...43? 44?
25
00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:10,280
49! What?! That's crazy! (LAUGHS)
26
00:02:10,320 --> 00:02:13,520
Gimme a second, bro. (GRUNTS)
27
00:02:13,560 --> 00:02:16,480
We got Huxley? We got Huxley in?
28
00:02:16,520 --> 00:02:18,760
Huxley?
29
00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:22,960
So, this is a...aftermath of a siege.
30
00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:26,160
This is Agent 49. He's dying.
31
00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:30,320
This is Huxley. He's doing some work
experience with us during the summer.
32
00:02:30,360 --> 00:02:34,280
Are you for real? Yes. (LAUGHS)
It's a new government scheme.
33
00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:37,000
It's something I'm pretty proud
to be a part of.
34
00:02:37,040 --> 00:02:41,200
Bringing through the next generation.
Is... Is that guy gonna die? Yeah.
35
00:02:41,240 --> 00:02:48,160
He's definitely... He's most
certainly gonna die. Find...Abacus.
36
00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:52,240
Aba-... Abacus? Did he...
What could that mean?
37
00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:54,920
Ah, heck!
38
00:02:57,280 --> 00:02:59,280
He's dead.
39
00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:01,840
He's dead as a daddy dodo.
40
00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:05,800
Yeah! He's a nice guy. I liked him.
41
00:03:05,840 --> 00:03:09,000
He could do 500 press-ups
on a couple of coconuts.
42
00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:11,240
Yeah. Good kisser, an' all.
43
00:03:11,280 --> 00:03:14,880
Strong tongue. Yeah. He sounds like
one hell of a human being.
44
00:03:14,920 --> 00:03:17,720
OK. Let's roll this out...
45
00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:20,600
..Action Team style.
46
00:03:41,320 --> 00:03:45,200
Ma'am? We have a Skype
friend request from a Vlad Schev 69.
47
00:03:45,240 --> 00:03:48,840
Ah! Thank you, Anne. Must be
Vladimir Schevchenko of Oliviak,
48
00:03:48,880 --> 00:03:52,240
rogue republic of Russia.
I didn't know he was still active.
49
00:03:52,280 --> 00:03:54,760
Shall I accept it
and trace the source? Yes.
50
00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:57,080
I was just about to say that.
51
00:03:58,080 --> 00:04:01,400
LOUDLY:
Accept it and trace the source!
52
00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:08,600
IN RUSSIAN ACCENT: Well, well, well!
53
00:04:09,600 --> 00:04:11,760
What do we have here?
54
00:04:11,800 --> 00:04:15,600
Cowardly custards of MI6!
55
00:04:15,640 --> 00:04:20,800
Hello. Yes, this is MI6,
Ruth Brooks. How may I help?
56
00:04:20,840 --> 00:04:26,880
I have some pretty sick shit lined up
for you buttholes in the West.
57
00:04:26,920 --> 00:04:29,520
Oh, really? And what's that? Abacus!
58
00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:32,880
DRAMATICALLY, WHISPERING:
Abacus, Abacus, Abacus...
59
00:04:32,920 --> 00:04:35,640
Abacus is a myth. Maybe it is...
60
00:04:36,640 --> 00:04:41,960
..maybe it isn't. Or maybe
it's completely just a false flag.
61
00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:45,920
That isn't what 'false flag' means.
Isn't it? A false flag would be
62
00:04:45,960 --> 00:04:48,909
if we made it seem like
you did something terrible,
63
00:04:48,989 --> 00:04:50,520
to frighten our own citizens.
64
00:04:50,560 --> 00:04:53,800
Oh! You've picked up completely
the wrong end of the stick!
65
00:04:53,840 --> 00:04:57,440
You fool! That's actually a lot
cooler than what we thought it was
66
00:04:57,480 --> 00:05:02,320
in the first place.
So maybe it IS that.
67
00:05:02,360 --> 00:05:06,440
Suck my dick, United Kingdom -
68
00:05:06,480 --> 00:05:10,400
North America's favourite bitch.
(BANGS CONSOLE)
69
00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:14,000
That was good.
That last bit REALLY felt good.
70
00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:16,680
I mean... It was...
Yes. Brilliant, right?
71
00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:19,600
Yeah. What bit wasn't so good,
you think, Sergei?
72
00:05:19,640 --> 00:05:21,960
What bit did we lose them on?
No. I'm sorry.
73
00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:24,400
No, no, no. Whisper. What bit was it?
74
00:05:24,440 --> 00:05:27,720
False flag. False-flag bit!
75
00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:30,000
The one bit I gave you
to look after!
76
00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:32,440
Mr Schevchenko? You haven't hung up.
77
00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:36,000
What? You do 'end call'.
What? Right. I'm sorry.
78
00:05:36,040 --> 00:05:40,040
This is an new laptop. We're just
trying to get the bugbears of it.
79
00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:42,840
What have you done?
I thought that it...
80
00:05:42,880 --> 00:05:47,080
What do I press? I think it's
circle button with camera on it.
81
00:05:47,120 --> 00:05:50,000
Yes. All right. I think...
Can you still see?
82
00:05:50,040 --> 00:05:53,120
Just put the lid down!
Just put the lid down.
83
00:05:54,120 --> 00:05:56,560
Sorry. You should be.
84
00:05:56,600 --> 00:06:00,000
Is new laptop. Well, I shall burn
your mother's village down.
85
00:06:00,040 --> 00:06:02,200
Oh, surely... No! It is...
86
00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:10,320
What were you doing in Morocco?
You weren't supposed to be there!
87
00:06:10,360 --> 00:06:14,720
Before you say anything, you can't
make me wear underpants. What?!
88
00:06:14,760 --> 00:06:18,280
Yesterday. The mission,
where Mr John flopped out.
89
00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:20,760
Was there something else
on your mind?
90
00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:25,200
Yes. Agent 49 is dead.
He was one of my best agents.
91
00:06:25,240 --> 00:06:28,920
What - best at being dead?
Just shut up. You're a liability,
92
00:06:28,960 --> 00:06:31,360
and I'm sick of it. Oh, really?
93
00:06:31,400 --> 00:06:35,640
Would a liability be able to pull
this from his pocket? A dongle!
94
00:06:35,680 --> 00:06:38,920
I found it on 49 before he bought it.
95
00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:42,560
Oh! That... Great(!) Brilliant(!)
I got it. I got it.
96
00:06:42,600 --> 00:06:45,160
Oh, God!
It's difficult to get a grip on it.
97
00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:48,840
Look at your fingers! They're huge!
Get the glass off my fingers.
98
00:06:48,880 --> 00:06:52,360
They're stuck. Ah! That's it.
99
00:06:53,800 --> 00:06:55,880
Right.
100
00:06:55,920 --> 00:06:59,520
What's on this? Details for
an attack on the National Theatre,
101
00:06:59,560 --> 00:07:03,800
Vienna, where this year's World
Peace Convention is taking place.
102
00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:06,680
We fear Abacus may strike.
103
00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:09,720
'What? You're joking!'
No, I'm being serious, Ruth.
104
00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:12,720
I worked this out on my own.
'You're the best, Logan!'
105
00:07:12,760 --> 00:07:15,600
'I dunno what I'd do without you.'
Oh, you'd be OK,
106
00:07:15,640 --> 00:07:19,440
but the world would be destroyed.
Right. Well, that's interesting.
107
00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:23,800
We had a direct threat from Vladimir
Schevchenko, name-checking Abacus,
108
00:07:23,840 --> 00:07:27,480
this morning. Clever!
I look forward to taking him down.
109
00:07:27,520 --> 00:07:29,560
No.
You won't be taking anybody down.
110
00:07:29,600 --> 00:07:32,360
You'll be going to Vienna
as eyes and ears only,
111
00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:36,400
and you'll leave the rest to the
Austrians. Why are THEY involved?
112
00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:40,800
Because Vienna's in Austria.
113
00:07:41,800 --> 00:07:43,480
Oh, yeah. Mm.
114
00:07:49,360 --> 00:07:51,600
You got anything, G-Whiz?
115
00:07:51,640 --> 00:07:54,000
Hell, yeah, Logi Bear.
116
00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:57,080
I've noticed a lot more people
dress their dogs here.
117
00:07:57,120 --> 00:07:59,600
I've seen three or four
with little vests on -
118
00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:03,880
mainly smaller breeds, but I did see
a Rottweiler in a hoodie. Hmm.
119
00:08:03,920 --> 00:08:06,240
Must be a European thing.
120
00:08:06,280 --> 00:08:08,800
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
121
00:08:08,840 --> 00:08:11,480
I'm on you. Cover me.
122
00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:14,120
Right behind you, boss.
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
123
00:08:20,240 --> 00:08:23,880
IN AUSTRIAN ACCENT: Good morning,
Mr Logan...Action Team.
124
00:08:25,760 --> 00:08:29,680
Your superior, Ruth Brooks, has sent
me to assist in your operation.
125
00:08:29,720 --> 00:08:32,680
I am Agent Bogohardt
of the Austrian Secret Service.
126
00:08:32,720 --> 00:08:35,480
We don't need any help.
We're fine on our own.
127
00:08:35,520 --> 00:08:39,640
I have intel on a prime suspect
that might be carrying Abacus.
128
00:08:39,680 --> 00:08:42,200
Well, fuck me!
Somebody pass me a wet-wipe.
129
00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:46,080
All right? Monica Lang, head of
explosives, mixed martial arts,
130
00:08:46,120 --> 00:08:48,320
pretty much anything goes. Oh!
131
00:08:50,240 --> 00:08:54,280
Can you hear that?
N-N-No. It's like a...
132
00:08:55,280 --> 00:08:57,640
..it's like a galloping...
133
00:08:57,680 --> 00:09:00,920
in my undercarriage.
134
00:09:00,960 --> 00:09:03,040
Oh, steady!
135
00:09:03,080 --> 00:09:05,800
Oh, more like a canter now.
136
00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:08,240
(SIGHS PASSIONATELY)
137
00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:11,680
Ah, hey... Hey, Mo? Leave it.
Leave it for now.
138
00:09:11,720 --> 00:09:14,360
All right.
Yeah, Mo. Just... Just chill out.
139
00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:16,600
All right. Fair play.
140
00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:18,400
Right.
141
00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:20,640
Right, show us this intel.
142
00:09:22,720 --> 00:09:25,160
So, who's this butt-munch?
143
00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:28,680
This is well-known bomb-maker
and terrorist Naslav Klone.
144
00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:33,280
Wow! Such a Russian-baddie name.
He is Ukrainian, actually.
145
00:09:33,320 --> 00:09:37,320
Well, what's the difference?
Same thing. Potato, po-tah-to.
146
00:09:37,360 --> 00:09:40,680
One difference is that
they are at war with each other.
147
00:09:40,720 --> 00:09:43,920
Klone is down to perform
at the main gala this evening.
148
00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:47,920
In attendance will be the patrons
of the world's leading charities.
149
00:09:47,960 --> 00:09:51,160
We believe inside the cello case
is a dirty bomb...
150
00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:53,160
(SNORTS)
151
00:09:53,200 --> 00:09:57,760
..codename Abacus. The security
will be incredibly tight.
152
00:09:57,800 --> 00:09:59,840
I believe we have to infiltrate -
153
00:09:59,880 --> 00:10:03,440
OK, can it. I got this, buster.
It's my team.
154
00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:06,240
Right! Here's how we're gonna do
this thing. Hux?
155
00:10:06,280 --> 00:10:08,760
You're going in undercover
as a waiter.
156
00:10:08,800 --> 00:10:12,000
Um... I-I'm only here on...
on work experience.
157
00:10:12,040 --> 00:10:14,160
I don't think I'm ready
to be a waiter.
158
00:10:14,200 --> 00:10:17,240
There's no 'can't' here.
You can do this.
159
00:10:17,280 --> 00:10:20,480
Graham, you're my eyes and ears.
As per.
160
00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:24,040
Monica, you take Dork Vader here
down to the basement.
161
00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:29,680
'Hack into the mainframe. Put one
Logan Mann on the gala's guest list.'
162
00:10:29,720 --> 00:10:32,800
Logan Mann?
But are you not going in disguise?
163
00:10:32,840 --> 00:10:34,360
(CHUCKLES)
164
00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:36,960
(LAUGHS UPROARIOUSLY)
165
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:43,960
It's called hiding...in plain sight.
166
00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:48,920
But you wouldn't know a thing
about that, would ya?
167
00:10:55,440 --> 00:10:57,600
The king is in the castle.
168
00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:05,640
Hey! What are you doing?
Are you waving at me?! (WHISTLES)
169
00:11:05,680 --> 00:11:09,640
You're waving and whistling! No, no!
You got to be a waiter.
170
00:11:09,680 --> 00:11:12,160
Go to the ballroom.
Go in the ballroom!
171
00:11:12,200 --> 00:11:16,600
Ballroom, OK? Let me know
as soon as Klone gets there.
172
00:11:22,360 --> 00:11:24,400
I have Klone in my sights.
173
00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:27,520
He's got a few big,
suspicious suitcases with him,
174
00:11:27,560 --> 00:11:31,480
and he's flanked by some rather
tasty-looking toe rags. Over.
175
00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:33,040
"Roger that."
176
00:11:33,080 --> 00:11:36,240
Evening.
Can I take your name, please, sir?
177
00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:38,560
Yeah. It's Mann - Logan Mann.
178
00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:42,480
I'm sorry, sir.
Your name is not on the list.
179
00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:44,840
Would you mind checking
one last time?
180
00:11:46,240 --> 00:11:49,720
Ah, come on, you fucker!
(TAPS KEYBOARD FRANTICALLY)
181
00:11:51,520 --> 00:11:53,520
Boom! He's in.
182
00:11:53,560 --> 00:11:56,080
Oh! Your name is here.
183
00:11:56,120 --> 00:12:00,040
I apologise, Mr Mann.
Please have a good evening.
184
00:12:00,080 --> 00:12:02,160
I intend to. Thank you, John.
185
00:12:03,800 --> 00:12:05,440
(SIGHS)
186
00:12:05,480 --> 00:12:08,200
Impressive!
187
00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:12,360
Yeah?
188
00:12:12,400 --> 00:12:16,080
So, what made you want to become
a secret agent?
189
00:12:16,120 --> 00:12:19,200
Ooh, steady!
190
00:12:20,920 --> 00:12:24,960
Are you flirting with me?
No, I'm just making small talk.
191
00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:27,960
No, I actually, er...
192
00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:32,160
became a secret agent in revenge for
what happened to my parents.
193
00:12:32,200 --> 00:12:35,520
Oh. I'm... I'm sorry.
194
00:12:36,920 --> 00:12:39,600
Were they murdered? No.
195
00:12:41,840 --> 00:12:44,280
Nah, they were divorced.
196
00:12:47,240 --> 00:12:49,880
I'm...really, really sorry
to hear that.
197
00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:52,000
Oh, well...
198
00:12:52,040 --> 00:12:54,280
c'est la vie.
199
00:12:55,280 --> 00:12:57,880
It's... It's funny. I've, er...
200
00:12:58,880 --> 00:13:01,000
..never told anyone that before.
201
00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:05,800
I just, er...feel like
I can tell you anything...
202
00:13:07,160 --> 00:13:09,160
..you know?
203
00:13:10,160 --> 00:13:13,560
Of course.
You can tell me everything.
204
00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:17,320
Yeah. (ELECTRICITY CRACKLES) Argh!
205
00:13:17,360 --> 00:13:19,880
Fuuuucking hell!
206
00:13:19,920 --> 00:13:21,200
Oof!
207
00:13:23,200 --> 00:13:26,600
Vlad? Hello. It's me.
208
00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:30,120
Abacus is now active.
209
00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:33,560
I will terminate them all.
210
00:13:36,900 --> 00:13:41,140
There you go.
Oh! Don't mind if I ding-dang-do.
211
00:13:41,180 --> 00:13:44,820
Thank you muchly.
In Austria, we say 'prost'.
212
00:13:44,860 --> 00:13:46,980
Oh! Proeust.
213
00:13:47,020 --> 00:13:49,020
(MUGS CLINK)
214
00:13:51,260 --> 00:13:54,580
By God! That IS milky tea, sir.
215
00:13:54,620 --> 00:13:56,380
(CHUCKLES)
216
00:13:56,420 --> 00:13:58,540
It's funny, foreign milk, innit?
217
00:13:58,580 --> 00:14:01,300
Can I just say, Bogohardt,
now that we're mates,
218
00:14:01,340 --> 00:14:02,980
um...
219
00:14:03,020 --> 00:14:05,820
don't take Logan's banter
too seriously, OK?
220
00:14:05,860 --> 00:14:08,660
I mean, they go on
as if I'm boring sometimes,
221
00:14:08,700 --> 00:14:12,180
and I just laugh my head off,
you know? Cos I'm all right.
222
00:14:12,220 --> 00:14:14,500
I'm all right...
223
00:14:14,540 --> 00:14:17,660
up here...in the nest.
224
00:14:17,700 --> 00:14:21,180
I got everything I need.
I got my pencils,
225
00:14:21,220 --> 00:14:23,220
I got my snacks...
226
00:14:23,260 --> 00:14:26,460
and I can see what you've done now.
You've poisoned me.
227
00:14:28,420 --> 00:14:30,420
(THUD OF BODY HITTING FLOOR)
228
00:14:32,300 --> 00:14:35,620
"Logan! Logan, look. He's here!"
229
00:14:35,660 --> 00:14:38,140
Yeah. "Logan!"
Yep. I... I can see him.
230
00:14:38,180 --> 00:14:40,180
I can see him. Just... I know.
231
00:14:40,220 --> 00:14:43,300
Stop pointing at him.
You're gonna attract attention.
232
00:14:43,340 --> 00:14:45,260
What?
233
00:14:45,300 --> 00:14:49,780
Oh, great(!) He's noticed you.
He's made you out.
234
00:14:49,820 --> 00:14:53,260
Kid, get out of here.
Why? Cos a lunatic with a bomb -
235
00:14:53,300 --> 00:14:56,500
No! Yes! A bomb?!
236
00:14:56,540 --> 00:14:58,620
Buddy, work with me here.
Oh, my gosh!
237
00:14:58,660 --> 00:15:02,620
You were in the room with me
when I was discussing the plan.
238
00:15:02,660 --> 00:15:06,100
Kid, get out of here. Get out.
"I'm going, I'm going!"
239
00:15:06,140 --> 00:15:08,660
Threat is live.
240
00:15:12,300 --> 00:15:15,140
Oh! (ELECTRICITY CRACKLES) Argh!
241
00:15:15,180 --> 00:15:20,780
OK, Klone. You want this
the easy way...or the hard way?
242
00:15:50,580 --> 00:15:52,460
Aaarrrgh!
243
00:15:54,900 --> 00:15:58,860
All right, chill out, everyone.
I'm from MI6.
244
00:15:58,900 --> 00:16:01,420
Er, these men...
245
00:16:01,460 --> 00:16:03,700
are from an evil network.
246
00:16:03,740 --> 00:16:06,260
In that case is a dirty bomb.
247
00:16:08,580 --> 00:16:10,780
Open the case. Go on.
248
00:16:10,820 --> 00:16:13,220
Open it.
249
00:16:19,420 --> 00:16:22,500
Well, it -
it is what looks like a cello.
250
00:16:22,540 --> 00:16:25,060
If it is... If it is a, um...
(CLEARS THROAT)
251
00:16:25,100 --> 00:16:27,620
..a cello, play it.
Play it, music man!
252
00:16:27,660 --> 00:16:31,260
Come on, pick it up.
Play it! Play it!
253
00:16:33,380 --> 00:16:36,380
(PLAYS SLOW-PACED CLASSICAL MELODY)
254
00:16:38,980 --> 00:16:41,700
Well... Ooh! (CLEARS THROAT)
255
00:16:41,740 --> 00:16:44,420
Holy shitballs! I did, er...
256
00:16:44,460 --> 00:16:48,260
I did not expect to feel like...
to feel like this right now.
257
00:16:48,300 --> 00:16:52,460
Beautiful sound. Stop it. Stop it!
You've proved your point.
258
00:16:52,500 --> 00:16:54,580
Very well proved. And, um...
259
00:16:54,620 --> 00:16:57,580
Round of applause! What a...
260
00:16:57,620 --> 00:17:01,420
What a performance! Anyone else here
think they were bad guys?
261
00:17:01,460 --> 00:17:03,860
I mean, straight off the bat...
262
00:17:03,900 --> 00:17:07,620
who else would wear sunglasses...
inside?
263
00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:11,340
We are the Cataract Society
String Quartet!
264
00:17:11,380 --> 00:17:13,740
Yep! Well, yeah, of course!
Blind people.
265
00:17:13,780 --> 00:17:16,860
That would...
Er, well, that's a great answer.
266
00:17:16,900 --> 00:17:19,380
So, musician and a brain-box!
267
00:17:19,420 --> 00:17:22,700
Someone call security!
Oh, there's no need for that!
268
00:17:22,740 --> 00:17:26,540
It's a...
It's a simple mistake. Um...
269
00:17:30,500 --> 00:17:34,580
Graham? Monica? Do you copy?
Do you copy me?! Do you copy?
270
00:17:34,620 --> 00:17:37,100
(ELECTRICITY CRACKLES) Arrgh!
271
00:17:38,140 --> 00:17:40,460
Graham?
272
00:17:40,500 --> 00:17:43,540
Graham, can you hear me?
273
00:17:43,580 --> 00:17:45,660
Yeah.
274
00:17:47,340 --> 00:17:50,180
OK. Situation is,
you've had a nasty fall.
275
00:17:51,180 --> 00:17:53,380
You can't feel your legs.
276
00:17:53,420 --> 00:17:55,500
You've soiled yourself...
277
00:17:55,540 --> 00:17:59,980
and you're probably gonna die
in a minute, I reckon.
278
00:18:00,020 --> 00:18:03,780
So, what we're gonna do is this.
We're gonna turn ourselves over...
279
00:18:03,820 --> 00:18:05,900
and, if I'm not mistaken,
280
00:18:05,940 --> 00:18:09,060
you should have some adrenaline
in your bum bag, son.
281
00:18:10,420 --> 00:18:12,060
OK.
282
00:18:15,220 --> 00:18:17,300
(GRUNTS AND GASPS)
283
00:18:18,300 --> 00:18:20,820
Come on! Come on!
284
00:18:25,140 --> 00:18:28,180
(SOUND OF NEEDLE STICKING INTO FLESH)
Aieeeee!
285
00:18:28,220 --> 00:18:30,540
"Logan? Monica? Do you copy? Over."
286
00:18:31,940 --> 00:18:34,300
"Logan? Monica? Do you copy? Over!"
287
00:18:38,660 --> 00:18:40,300
Bogohardt!
288
00:18:40,340 --> 00:18:43,460
Or, should I say, Abacus.
289
00:18:43,500 --> 00:18:45,900
Finally he works it out!
290
00:18:45,940 --> 00:18:49,700
Idiots! I walked right into
your midst, and...
291
00:18:49,740 --> 00:18:52,060
How do you call it, Mr Logan?
292
00:18:52,100 --> 00:18:55,580
I'm...hiding in plain sight.
293
00:18:55,620 --> 00:19:00,140
You know, it was really sad,
watching you chasing your own tail,
294
00:19:00,180 --> 00:19:02,180
like itchy-itchy-bum dog.
295
00:19:02,220 --> 00:19:04,820
But your plan is very bullshit.
296
00:19:04,860 --> 00:19:07,620
Oh, and, er...what about Klone?
297
00:19:07,660 --> 00:19:10,940
Just a diversion.
I don't get it, though.
298
00:19:10,980 --> 00:19:14,380
You were the threat to the convention
this whole time?
299
00:19:14,420 --> 00:19:19,020
Mr Logan, you will never get it.
300
00:19:19,060 --> 00:19:23,340
And now... (GUN CLICKS)
..you're going to die.
301
00:19:23,380 --> 00:19:25,860
Logan! Logan! (SOBS)
302
00:19:25,900 --> 00:19:29,100
Any last words, Western pigs? Yeah.
303
00:19:29,140 --> 00:19:31,740
I got something to say.
304
00:19:33,060 --> 00:19:35,300
You know your balls stink?
305
00:19:35,340 --> 00:19:37,140
My what?!
306
00:19:37,180 --> 00:19:41,660
Yeah. You... You have severely
stinking bollocks, my friend.
307
00:19:41,700 --> 00:19:44,100
And, sitting where I am right now,
308
00:19:44,140 --> 00:19:46,500
it's getting in my grille,
up my nose.
309
00:19:46,540 --> 00:19:50,300
I can taste your balls! (LAUGHS)
Seriously?!
310
00:19:50,340 --> 00:19:54,900
For you, this is the last thing
you ever want to say?
311
00:19:54,940 --> 00:19:57,380
You're more pathetic than I thought.
312
00:19:57,420 --> 00:20:00,300
Do not beat yourself up about this,
buster.
313
00:20:00,340 --> 00:20:02,580
I know a lot of guys
with smelly balls.
314
00:20:02,620 --> 00:20:06,420
Here's what you need to do.
Have yourself a bath or a shower,
315
00:20:06,460 --> 00:20:09,580
and then, when you're done,
dry off your squiddles
316
00:20:09,620 --> 00:20:12,980
and then sprinkle on a little talc.
Get those talced up nice!
317
00:20:13,020 --> 00:20:16,140
Just dust them down.
Yeah, dusting's good. Just shut up!
318
00:20:16,180 --> 00:20:18,820
You just try to make me feel bad
319
00:20:18,860 --> 00:20:21,900
because you made shitty,
shitty, bullshit plan,
320
00:20:21,940 --> 00:20:25,420
and not realise that I am Abacus!
Ya got me!
321
00:20:25,460 --> 00:20:28,220
(LAUGHS) My plan really did stink.
322
00:20:28,260 --> 00:20:31,020
But you know the only thing
that stinks worse?
323
00:20:31,060 --> 00:20:33,420
What? Your gonads.
324
00:20:33,460 --> 00:20:35,620
Your balls, eh? Oh, wow!
325
00:20:35,660 --> 00:20:39,900
I wash my balls, OK?! I wash
and clean my balls every morning
326
00:20:39,940 --> 00:20:42,980
before breakfast.
(SNIFFS) I wash my balls, yeah?
327
00:20:43,020 --> 00:20:46,260
There's nothing wrong.
They don't stink! (TWO GUNSHOTS)
328
00:20:48,900 --> 00:20:51,100
Nice shooting, G-String.
329
00:20:51,140 --> 00:20:55,220
"Nice shooting, indeed."
Oh, it's an absolute pleasure, mate.
330
00:20:55,260 --> 00:20:57,340
(PHONE RINGS)
331
00:20:58,540 --> 00:21:00,540
Hello?
332
00:21:00,580 --> 00:21:02,900
Got Logan Mann, ma'am.
333
00:21:02,940 --> 00:21:05,020
Thank you, Anne.
334
00:21:05,060 --> 00:21:08,020
Oh! What the hell is going on
out there, Mann?
335
00:21:08,060 --> 00:21:11,620
Threat neutralised, ma'am.
Abacus is down.
336
00:21:11,660 --> 00:21:14,140
(SIGHS IN RELIEF) Well done, team.
337
00:21:14,180 --> 00:21:15,980
Great.
338
00:21:16,020 --> 00:21:19,020
That's Mr Schevchenko on line two.
339
00:21:19,060 --> 00:21:21,140
Fine. Put him through.
340
00:21:21,180 --> 00:21:24,420
Yes, Mr Schevchenko?
What can we do for you now?
341
00:21:24,460 --> 00:21:26,900
Hello, everyone! Is everyone there?
342
00:21:26,940 --> 00:21:29,340
"Can you hear me?"
Yes, we can hear you.
343
00:21:29,380 --> 00:21:35,420
I can hear you. That's right,
you gas-buying bitches!
344
00:21:35,460 --> 00:21:38,140
Bogohardt is Abacus.
345
00:21:38,180 --> 00:21:41,340
Abacus is down. He's dead.
346
00:21:41,380 --> 00:21:43,460
(GIGGLES)
347
00:21:44,460 --> 00:21:48,340
You fool! You stupid fool!
348
00:21:48,380 --> 00:21:51,820
Abacus is not one man!
349
00:21:51,860 --> 00:21:54,740
It's many...men!
350
00:21:54,780 --> 00:21:57,780
Abacus is everywhere!
351
00:21:57,820 --> 00:22:02,660
WHISPERS DRAMATICALLY:
Everywhere, everywhere, everywhere!
352
00:22:02,700 --> 00:22:07,500
It's a good view from up there,
wouldn't you say, Mr Mann?
353
00:22:07,540 --> 00:22:10,540
It's all right. It's not
the best view I've ever seen,
354
00:22:10,580 --> 00:22:14,060
but it's perfectly adequate,
quite a nice view - (EXPLOSION)
355
00:22:15,460 --> 00:22:18,340
(HORNS BLARE / CAR ALARMS BEEP)
Oh, God!
356
00:22:18,380 --> 00:22:20,980
That's me, Bullshit Mann!
357
00:22:21,020 --> 00:22:24,620
It was a double, double,
double, double bluff!
358
00:22:24,660 --> 00:22:26,940
Slam-dunking your face!
359
00:22:26,980 --> 00:22:30,220
You see, the real fun,
it begins now,
360
00:22:30,260 --> 00:22:33,460
and my next move will be more insane
361
00:22:33,500 --> 00:22:37,700
and more scary
than this one even was!
362
00:22:37,740 --> 00:22:40,100
Good night!
363
00:22:40,140 --> 00:22:43,420
Well, I think you know what
we're dealing with here, ma'am.
364
00:22:43,460 --> 00:22:45,420
Yes.
365
00:22:48,140 --> 00:22:50,340
What's going on, Logi Bear?
366
00:22:50,380 --> 00:22:54,420
Some sick maniac
has just blown up a building...
367
00:22:54,460 --> 00:22:57,980
for no good reason but to show off.
368
00:22:58,980 --> 00:23:01,500
But...didn't we do that
last week in Morocco?
369
00:23:01,540 --> 00:23:05,100
No. No, no, no, no. That's
a completely different explo-...
370
00:23:05,140 --> 00:23:08,700
Why? It just is.
It was the exact same thing.
371
00:23:08,740 --> 00:23:11,620
It really isn't.
You don't know what's going on.
372
00:23:11,660 --> 00:23:14,940
But we did the exact same thing.
That's irrelevant.
373
00:23:14,980 --> 00:23:18,420
It really is. You're...
Inquisitive mind! I like that.
374
00:23:18,460 --> 00:23:22,125
But keep it to yourself. It's -
Graham, mate, you shat yourself?
375
00:23:22,205 --> 00:23:23,220
That is affirmative.
376
00:23:23,260 --> 00:23:26,980
Whew! Mate, that's strong.
(COUGHS) I know.
377
00:23:27,020 --> 00:23:30,700
(GAGS) It's in my shoes.
378
00:23:31,740 --> 00:23:33,700
(SIGHS)
379
00:23:34,900 --> 00:23:37,100
Ma'am?
380
00:23:37,140 --> 00:23:39,140
Yes, Anne?
381
00:23:39,980 --> 00:23:42,580
Do you fancy maybe grabbing a drink?
382
00:23:42,620 --> 00:23:45,380
(LAUGHS) No!
383
00:23:45,420 --> 00:23:49,580
Yes. Of course, ma'am. Good night.
29692
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