Original subtitles

[dramatic music playing]

[rumbling]

-[alarm buzzes] -Huh?

Huh?

[alarm continues]

[groans]

[rumbling]

Something we can do for ya, bub?

Yeah. I've come to join the X-Men.

[theme music playing]

You're kidding, right?

You heard me. I want to be an X-Man.

I'm serious.

Hmm. Yeah, right.

And I want to be the Tooth Fairy.

[laughter]

Now just a minute.

Let's hear what he has to say.

All right, Lance.

Tell us, why do you want to join the X-Men?

[Kitty] Yeah, don't you like living with those losers anymore?

[Lance] Nah, they're all right.

What are you up to, Lance?

You didn't bust in here just to make jokes.

Well, I...

Let's just say it was time for a change, OK?

Fair enough.

-Why don't we give it a try? -Huh?

Professor, I...

Kitty, would you show Lance to one of the guest rooms?

Whatever. Follow me.

-Just kidding. -Ah!

Professor, I think this is a mistake.

I know Lance.

He wouldn't do this unless he wanted something.

Yes, I agree.

What he wants is to be near Kitty.

-But-- -I believe he's genuine

about his feelings for her.

And maybe that's a good beginning.

Now, let's give him a chance.

Here you are, sir.

Sorry there's no mints on your pillow,

but I believe you'll find some gum under the chair.

Hey, not bad.

'Course I'll have to grunge it up some before it feels like home.

There. All unpacked.

Uh-huh. Well then, welcome to Mutant Manor.

Breakfast is at 7:00.

[sighs] Lance, look,

I think it's cool you want to be an X-Man, really.

But watch it.

This place is no walk in the park,

and the other guys aren't gonna cut you any slack.

[scoffs] Come on, I can handle it.

How tough can it be?

All pre-flight systems checked.

All right, Iceman, take her out.

Nice and slow.

All right! Hang on to your lunch!

[engines firing]

Hey! Slow down, will ya?

Yes!

[engine stalls and alarm beeps]

Aw, man.

[Cyclops] Pull up! Pull up!

[Lance screaming]

[student] I don't feel so good.

[both groans]

Hey, did you see? Were you watching?

This time it took me twice as long to crash and burn!

Yeah. Look, kid, that kind of hot-doggin' ain't gonna cut it in a real battle.

You gotta think before you start playin' cowboy commando!

Lance?

-Huh? -[Kitty] Are you OK?

Hey, piece of cake.

Told you there was nothing to this X-Man stuff.

Well...

good.

[gulps]

[Xavier] Don't you think you were a little hard on him?

I mean, after all, you've been known to do a little hot-dogging yourself.

Yeah, but I can walk away from a crash.

They can't.

Well, what are you looking at, Elf?

Keep sweeping.

You still got another week of probation to work off.

Yes, sir. Sorry.

Yeah, and when you're finished,

you can mop out the simulator.

Yeah, sure. Who wouldn't want to be an X-Man?

It's so fulfilling.

[gasps] oh!

Yeah! OK!

Huh?

Hey, your new uniform looks a lot better than that fruit bowl you used to wear.

[growls]

[groans]

[rumbling]

Ah!

[Cannonball] All right! Nice going!

[Jubilee] Nice work, Lance.

[Iceman] Yeah!

[grunting]

[screams]

Ooh!

[buzzer]

[Alvers] Ha!

[Cyclops] Watch this.

Oh!

[laughing]

[Cyclops] OK, victims, stand by.

Rescuers ready?

Uh!

Whoa!

[giggles]

[inhales]

[laughs]

Wrong victim, Alvers!

And you just drowned two people!

Yeah, but look who I rescued.

-Creep! -[both scream]

Nice car, Summers.

Huh? Hey, who's been messing with my car?

[Lance] See ya!

[Scott] Alvers!

[school bell rings]

-[Lance] Later, guys! -Later, dude.

See you, Lance.

Uh! Hey!

Hi, Lance. Long time, no see.

Yeah, where ya been, ol' buddy?

Get your hands off me, Wide Load.

You know, we heard the craziest thing, Lance.

Somebody said you were living with the geek squad.

Yeah? Is that what they said?

I knew it! Mystique's gonna hand you

your left arm when she gets back.

Ah, she's not coming back.

The brotherhood is history.

You guys just don't know it yet.

Oh, yeah? Well... well...

-Well... -Witty come back, blob.

You're becoming one of them, aren't you?

You're becoming an X-Man.

So what if I am?

Say what?

Aw, man, to think I used to look up to you.

You're making a mistake, Lance.

You'll never fit in with those guys.

And they're never gonna accept you.

[yawns]

[humming]

Hello?

Is anyone there?

Hmm.

[gasps]

Ooh.

[excited chatter]

-[Jubilee] Woo! -[Bobby] Ha ha!

Man, this is awesome!

Hey, check this out.

[excited cheers]

Ooh!

Whoa, look at all these controls.

Hey, what's this do?

[Iceman] Aw, it didn't do anything.

How about this one?

[Jubilee] Nothing.

Try all the other buttons.

[Multiple] Let me try some!

[Bobby] Aw, man, this X-Van stinks!

It doesn't do anything!

[groans]

Oh.

[Xavier telepathically] Attention, new recruits.

There will be a special early morning session with Logan.

Report to the hangar immediately.

[Kurt] "Wash the uniforms.

Wash the van. Wash the jet."

This probation is turning my fur kinky.

Gee, Logan, you think you're pushing these kids a little too hard?

Nah, it's good for 'em.

And here's our pride and joy,

The X-Jet.

It does mach 5 at 40,000 feet

With every new power-thrust, camouflage,

stealth capability the professor can dream up.

It'll out-run, out-fly and out-fight anything on 2 wings.

And still make a great cup of coffee.

Ah, ah, ah!

No finger marks!

I just spent a month detailing this baby.

Oh, ah, sorry.

Hey, does this demo mean we're gonna get to fly the real jet this time?

Yeah, that'll happen.

Let's try something a little smaller.

Like the X-Van.

Hey, shouldn't we...

[Logan] What...

what happened to the van?

[creaking]

I bet I know.

[Multiple] Aw, come on, guys, please!

-I'll be really quiet, I promise. -Shh!

We told you, forget it!

You make too big a crowd. Literally!

Now get back to bed, all of you!

I never get to go.

[snoring]

Huh-- what?

[Jubilee] Lance! Lance, wake up!

We're going on another joyride. You wanna come with us?

You're gonna get the blame anyway.

Forget it! You got me in enough trouble.

Now leave me alone.

OK, your loss. But this time, we're taking something else.

Something bigger and faster.

Hot diggity.

Aw, cool!

[Jubilee] You guys sure about this?

Yeah! Let's do it.

Bigger and faster?

The X-Jet!

Kitty! Wake up!

Uh... Lance?

What are you doing here?

-Shh, follow me! -Huh.

Bobby, I just don't know about this.

Can't stop now!

[Bobby] We are rollin'!

Oh, man! Those stupid kids!

Kids? What kids?

Lance, what are you--

Start phasing!

[Kitty screams]

Get the doors open! Get 'em open!

[Bobby] I can't find the switch!

-[Jubilee] Here it is. -[screams]

[Sam] I almost had to change my shorts.

[Bobby] All right! Hang on to your lunch!

[Sam] Hey, all right!

[all cheering]

[all screaming]

Hey, guys, check this out.

[Jubilee laughing]

Hang on.

Let's see what this baby can do!

[both groans]

Oh, they are so in trouble!

Take my hand.

[clears her throat]

[all scream]

What are you guys doin'--

Oh, man! Look what you did!

Oops.

We're picking up speed!

Oh, no! It's seized up!

I can't slow this thing down!

I just remembered.

Oh, I hate flying!

I'll try to fix it.

X-Jet to base! X-Jet to base!

Oh, it's no good. The radio's fried.

One of these switches has gotta do something.

What the devil is that?

Patrol one-zero-niner to unknown aircraft.

You are traveling in restricted airspace.

[pilot] Identify yourself.

Oh, man. I'd better--

Forget it!

I'm taking charge as of now!

We gotta show 'em we're friendly.

Is this the P.A. System?

Incoming!

[pilot] Patrol one-zero-niner to base.

We've got a hostile aircraft here.

Permission to engage!

Uh, Bobby, what do those little blips on the screen mean?

[Bobby] Oh, no!

Heat seekers!

I got it covered.

Bobby, try it now.

The propulsion's cut!

All right!

[gasps] I'm new at this,

But isn't that a bad thing?

Well, it depends how you feel about emergency landings.

[everyone screaming]

[gulps]

[vomiting]

My hero.

Ah!

We got more company!

Not for long!

They're firing on us!

Out of the way!

[groans]

[rumbling]

Pull up!

-[beeping] -[Bobby] Uh!

-I can't lose 'em! -I can. I think.

Head into that mesa.

What?

Just do it!

[second pilot] Did you just see that?

No, and you didn't either.

Now, let's get out of here.

-Oh, wow. -Man, that was close.

[Jubilee] I can't believe it.

Mmm?

Alvers.

You took another joyride, didn't you?

-Actually-- -Yeah. I did it.

-So? -I knew it!

[Bobby] No, he didn't.

We did.

Lance was only trying to stop us.

We took the X-Van, too.

Who's "we"?

Uh, and Scott's car.

And your motorcycle.

My motorcycle?

-Just kidding! -[laughing nervously]

Well, luckily, there's been no official mention of the incident.

The military must believe it was a UFO sighting,

so... they're no doubt covering it up.

Now all I've got to do is wax the X-Jet

And my probation is history.

Oh, man!

This is gonna take a lot of wax.

That's all right, Kurt.

Consider your probation over.

-Yeah! -Yours, however, is just beginning.

You can start by cleaning up the X-Jet.

I, uh, guess we all owe you an apology.

Especially me.

Save it, summers. I'm out of here!

Lance, we're sorry.

It's been a challenging transition for us all.

Please stay, Lance.

Sorry, living with the brotherhood's a piece of cake compared to you guys.

You're way too high maintenance.

Well, if you ever change your mind...

[theme music playing]