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[seagulls cawing]
[Jacqueline] Captain Otis Barnaby
came into our lives
one sunny afternoon a few weeks ago.
He looked and talked as if he had stepped right out of
every seafaring story ever written.
Ahoy.
Well, ahoy there.
I'm Captain Otis Barnaby,
master and owner of this vessel.
You the skipper of that crew?
Yes, uh. I'm Sister Bertrille
and these are the children of the convent San Tanco.
[chuckles]
Would you like to come aboard?
[children chattering]
Well, I--I think we would,
except you look like you've a lot of work to do.
That's why I'm gonna Shanghai you.
Come on, shipmates. Come aboard here.
That's it, take it easy now,
I don't want you falling in the water. That's the way.
Ah, what a crew I've got here.
That's right, my lad, slap it on good.
[chuckles]
50 years at sea,
and I never sailed with better shipmates.
That's a great crew you got there, Sister.
I think so.
What's the name of your boat?
Well, I ain't named her yet.
She sailed under the name of the pelican,
Until I bought her 3 weeks ago.
I aim to re-christen her
as soon as I've turned her back into a lady.
And then what?
Then I sail to Miami.
Miami, Florida?
The same.
You're going to sail over a thousand miles
in this little boat?
Sister,
sometimes you have to aim for the stars.
Captain, they may be easier to reach than Miami.
Not if you're Captain Otis Barnaby,
And you've sailed around the horn
more times than you can remember.
[chuckles]
I want to tell you there's nothing like it.
You're all alone,
The master of your own destiny,
Free as a cloud,
and the wind and the spray blowing in your face,
and the smell of the sea in your nostrils.
[inhaling]
You feel like a bird, skimming over the waves,
Soaring through the sky away from everything.
[Captain Otis chuckles] You know,
Just thinking about it
makes your blood stir and your pulses pound.
I know the feeling.
You know something, Sister?
I believe you do.
[Jacqueline] And at that moment,
Captain Barnaby and Sister Bertrille realized
they were kindred spirits.
What Sister Bertrille didn't realize
was that this was to be the start
of the most extraordinary adventure of her young life.
โชโช
โชโช
[Jacqueline] During the days that followed,
the Captain became a regular visitor
to the convent San Tanco.
The children came to adore him
as each day he brought the lure of the sea
and exciting tales of tall ships and heroic deeds
into their stuffy little classroom.
And there we were, maties,
fighting for our lives in a gale
that had been howling at us for 24 hours.
Giant hailstones, seas 40 feet high,
the wind blowing 70 knots,
the wheel lashed,
but the ship was rolling so badly
that the pumps weren't working.
Suddenly, there's a crack.
And the skipper turns to me and screams,
"The topsail's broke loose. Go aloft and furl it!"
And there I was, 100 feet above deck,
and the sea gone mad, clinging to a mast
that was splitting the sky with an 80 degree arc.
[exclaims]
[Jacqueline] Then one morning,
a few days before he was due to set sail
in his little boat,
Sister Bertrille discovered the Captain in the classroom.
Captain Barnaby, what are you doing here so early?
Oh, I'm installing a radio.
A radio? Yeah.
I made it myself.
I'll be able to talk to you and the children
during the voyage.
Oh, now, and--and see here.
I, uh, I pinned this map up.
Now you'll be able to chart my course every day.
I--I--I thought the children would enjoy that.
Oh, I'm sure they will,
but is this going to be your only contact with land?
It's the only contact I want.
Oh, but Captain-- Sister,
every sailor has a favorite port.
Mine's the convent San Tanco.
Permission granted?
Aye, aye, Captain.
[Jacqueline] That afternoon the bombshell exploded.
Sister Bertrille, there's a Mr. Conrad Barnaby to see you.
Conrad Barnaby?
Is he a relative of the Captain's?
It's his son.
Why, he never mentioned having a son.
Uh, class, continue your reading.
Uh, Mr. Barnaby?
Oh, yes.
Sister, look, I don't believe in wasting time,
so I'd like to get right to the point.
The chances of my father
successfully completing this voyage are,
excuse me,
46,754 to 1.
You worked it out?
I'm a statistician.
I want you to dissuade my father
from this ridiculous voyage.
Mr. Barnaby, it's not ridiculous to him.
Uh, I know it's risky,
but he is an experienced seaman.
Sister,
my father hadn't even seen the ocean until 6 weeks ago.
What?
He spent all of his life in Lincoln, Nebraska
as an insurance salesman.
But--but I don't understand.
He--he looks and sounds so nautical.
He didn't even have a beard until 5 weeks ago.
Maybe you'd better explain the whole story to me.
All right.
2 years ago, the company that employs me
transferred me here to San Juan.
Can I come aboard?
Well, ahoy there, Sister.
Sure you can come aboard. Thanks.
Everything's all squared away and shipshape
for the voyage tomorrow.
It's a great feeling to have a good ship
under your feet again.
And more interesting
than the insurance business, huh?
The dried prune was in to see you.
Conrad told me the whole story.
Oh.
Why'd you lie to us, Captain Barnaby?
Well, they weren't mean lies, were they, gal?
No, not mean, just hard to understand.
Well, when you've had a dream a long time,
you start to believe it's true.
And all my life
I dreamed of being Captain of a sailing ship.
So you settled for being an insurance salesman.
Settled is right.
Oh, it wasn't a bad life,
just dull like thousands of others, I suppose.
Well, what about your son?
Yes, what about my son?
You know that boy has a life plan?
Life plan? Sure.
He has a chart up on the wall.
Graduate school at a certain date,
Make vice president at a certain date,
Get married at 35,
have 3 point 7 children, I guess.
And has he kept to his plan?
Of course.
And when he first came here,
he met this girl called Marรญa.
I had hopes that he'd marry her
and scuttle the whole shebang.
But he even resisted that temptation.
You might say my son loves wisely,
but not too well.
Why didn't he wanna marry her?
Well, she's a widow,
she's 3 years older than him, she's got 4 kids.
It's not logical for him to marry her.
You see, Conrad...
believes in logic, Sister.
Let's go below, I've got some coffee going.
Oh, great.
[cups rattle]
Uh, tell me, Mr. Barnaby, do you believe in logic?
Well, there's lots of things in this world aren't logical.
Some things you just have to take on faith.
I know.
Well, I guess you do.
All my life I've been logical,
but now I've finally outgrown it.
But this voyage,
you don't know anything about the sea.
That's where you're wrong.
I know everything about the sea.
I had the best teachers in the world. Who?
Melville, Conrad, Bligh, Cook, Stevenson.
I've read every word ever printed about sailing.
Mr. Barnaby, reading can only teach you so much.
I haven't only read, Sister.
All my life I've taken courses in navigation,
I've studied design, I've built models,
I can use a sextant and I can chart a course.
So you see, Sister, I'm not a complete old fake.
But why take such a dangerous voyage?
Sister, I'm 68 years old and I've never done anything
that I could point to with any pride.
Worse still, I haven't even tried.
I just lived with a dream that finally went cold.
Now, I've got one last chance to rekindle that dream.
And if I don't do it,
I'm not gonna be much good for anything.
Bon voyage, Captain.
Thank you.
โชโช
I hereby christen this ship Sister Bertrille.
[people cheering]
Ah, thank you, Sister.
I'll try to make her live up to her name.
Oh, it was my honor.
Well, I wanted to name her
after a lady of spirit and grace.
The sisters have packed all your supplies, Captain.
There's everything in here from soup to bolts.
Nuts, Sister.
Oh, there's, that's--that's in here too.
And oranges to keep away the scurvy.
Well, uh, thank you, sisters.
I'm sure it will all be delicious.
All right, me maties, let's get this chow aboard.
No sign of the dried prune, huh?
I'm afraid not, Captain.
I tried to explain to him how you felt,
but I just couldn't get through.
Well, no matter.
I didn't expect him anyway, no matter.
Nelson couldn't ask for a better sendoff.
Everything shipshape there, Sister?
The children would like to say goodbye, Captain.
Well, of course.
I wouldn't sail away without a farewell
to the best shipmates I ever had.
Doesn't his son even care enough to say goodbye?
Maybe he cares too much.
Well, what's keeping him away? Pride?
Yeah. The wrong kind.
Well, goodbye, Sister Jacqueline.
Goodbye, Captain.
Goodbye, gal.
Smooth sailing, Captain.
[seagulls cawing]
Goodbye, Sister Ana.
Goodbye, Sister Sixto.
[engine starts]
Cast off!
Well, it's up to the Captain now.
There's nothing more we can do.
Except pray for fair weather.
[thunder cracking]
[wind howling]
[radio whining]
[wind howling]
You must eat something, Sister.
I know you're worried,
but starving yourself isn't going to help.
No. I suppose not.
It's no wonder she looks like
something the cat dragged
through the fence backwards.
All day long she sits by the radio
listening to nothing.
No word at all? No.
Sister Bertrille. Sister Bertrille.
Captain Barnaby. The Captain is on the radio.
Oh!
โชโช
Here's Sister Bertrille now, Captain.
He sounds very weak.
Captain Barnaby, what happened?
Are you all right?
We're riding out the tail end of the storm now,
but things are pretty much of a shambles.
The auxiliary's gone, I lost the jib.
That gale came out of nowhere and hit us
before I had a chance to furl her.
Have you got a spare?
[captain] Sure.
I'll get her up as soon as I catch me a fish.
Catch you a fish? What happened to your supplies?
Davey Jones locker. But don't worry.
I'll catch something.
Captain, we'll send out the coastguard to pick you up.
I said I lost me supplies, gal, not me pride.
Now don't be stubborn. Give us your position.
I haven't the foggiest,
and if I did, I wouldn't give it to you.
Look, stop feeling sorry for me.
I wouldn't have missed this trip for all the world.
I'm where I've always been--
Captain Barnaby?
Captain Barnaby!
The radio's gone dead.
What are we going to do?
Uh, go pack some supplies.
And find me some spare radio parts.
Radio parts?
I'm gonna try and find him.
[Jacqueline] With fair weather,
and armed with fresh supplies,
Sister Bertrille's operation airlift began.
[wind blowing]
[snoring]
[ship creaking]
[continues snoring]
Sister Bertrille.
Wait a minute.
What are you looking for? Me wings.
Your wings?
I, uh, thought I might be dead.
No, Captain, I'm afraid you're not dead.
I'm having a hallucination.
And you are a figment of my imagination.
Mind you, you, uh...
You look p-pretty solid for a figment.
Thanks.
Ah, it--it--it all fits.
I'm groggy, the storm, nothing to eat.
But why haven't you eaten?
No food.
What's that?
But I--I--I lost all me supplies.
How did this get here?
I don't know, maybe the sisters packed 2 sets of supplies.
Well, at least you could talk to me while I'm eating.
Do figments eat?
Well, I can do anything you want me to do.
Do you play gin? Do you?
Sure.
Then so do I.
Let's go below.
Hold it. Now.
[thudding]
[whistling]
Gin.
Wait a minute.
If you're a figment of my imagination,
how come you're beating me?
I don't know.
It's the first time I've ever been a figment.
Well, anyway, you're good company.
I'll be sorry to see you disappear.
You know, it's a pity that your radio broke down.
Can't you fix it?
Well, I don't think it's any use.
I've torn it apart,
but I haven't found the trouble yet.
Uh, but you are going
to put it back together
and try it again, huh?
Oh, sure, but I don't hold out much hope.
How do you feel?
Fine, fine,
A little weak, but fine.
Does that mean you'll be leaving?
Well, you don't need me anymore.
Say, c-c-could I ask you o-one last question?
Why did you appear
in the form of Sister Bertrille?
Why do you think?
Well, I guess
because she's about the best friend I ever had.
Smooth sailing, Captain.
[sighs]
[wind blowing]
Well, I suppose that's the way figments are,
here today and gone tomorrow.
[laughs]
Dad, are you sure you're all right?
[captain] Couldn't be better.
Not even lonely. had lots of company.
Company? What--what company?
Sister Figment.
Sister who?
[Captain Otis laughs]
That's just my little joke, son.
You see, this figment dropped in on me.
And the darndest thing, she looks just like
that little Sister Bertrille,
back at the convent there.
Had quite a conversation with her.
Dad, look--look, let me get this straight.
You think you had a--a visit from a nun?
That I did.
Beat me at gin too.
Of course, it's all in the mind,
but she looked as real as anything.
As a matter of fact,
I'm trying to conjure her up again.
Dad, now just...
Just relax, everything's gonna be all right.
Of course it is. I'm gonna make it, son.
Without any help from anybody but my figment.
Figment.
Got to sign off now, son.
Give my love to the children and the sisters.
I'll get back to you tomorrow.
Well, that settles that.
Settles what, Mr. Barnaby?
I'm gonna get the coast guard
and pull him out of there, of course.
But why?
Why? My father's obviously lost his senses.
[inaudible]
[alarm beeping]
He did what?
Nothing I could say would stop him.
But they can't pull him out.
He's gonna make it. Where is Mr. Barnaby?
He's in the Reverend Mother's office
Waiting to hear from the coast guard.
Come on. We're gonna tell him the truth.
You can do what?
Fly. That's how I got to the boat today.
Do you expect me to believe that?
We figured it was a long shot, but we were desperate.
We?
You mean you believe she can fly too?
Of course. She's Sister Figment.
You see, Mr. Barnaby, we don't have much time.
We want you to call the coast guard and tell them.
That you can fly?
Oh, no. We tell very few people about that.
Yes. That I can understand.
The Reverend Mother isn't too crazy
to have that noised around.
So, we want you to call the coast guard
and tell them that you've received information
that your father's OK,
and to call off the search.
Here's the phone, Mr. Barnaby.
No.
I don't know what's going on,
but I know that it's illogical
to believe that anybody can fly.
[phone rings]
Yes.
Speaking. Yeah... They have?
One of the planes has spotted him.
How long will it take
for one of your boats to reach him?
Now, I wanna warn you
that my father might protest this rescue.
You must understand that he's just undergone
A very severe emotional--
Excuse me for just a moment.
She really can fly.
Seeing is believing.
How--how does she do that?
Well, she doesn't really know.
She doesn't know?
Mr. Barnaby,
not everything in life is logical.
[man chatters]
Yes, yes, I- I'm--I'm still here.
Uh, Captain,
I'd like to make
what may seem to be a surprising request.
[Jacqueline] And so the good ship Sister Bertrille
held firm to its course. next stop: Miami.
[seagulls cawing]
Well, maties, there I was,
10 miles out of Miami
with a fair wind and smooth sailing ahead.
But suddenly the sea erupts like a volcano.
[exclaims]
And I look up and there's a whale
as big as a house not 5 feet from the bow.
Dad telling stories again?
Uh-huh. You don't mind?
No, why should I?
Some of this one's true.
Besides, uh,
I guess he's entitled
to tell them whatever he wants.
They're his grandchildren.
His grandchildren?
I became the father of 4 2 weeks ago
When I married Marรญa.
[stutters]
Congratulations.
You needn't look so surprised, Sister.
You know there's some things in life
that just aren't logical.
โชโช
โชโช
[end credits]
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