Original subtitles

[dog barking]

[Jacqueline] At convent San Tanco,

Sister Bertrille is known as the great innovator.

She despises the routine or the expected.

She refuses to be pedestrian,

in more ways than one.

In her classwork, she often borrows methods from big business and industry.

Like her incentive program for her first-graders,

with a bonus for the student who showed the most progress.

Reverend Mother Placido had misgivings.

But since Sister Bertrille joined us,

that has become chronic.

But she was as eager as the rest of us to know

the results of the incentive program.

Well, Sister Bertrille, who is the winner?

Well, it wasn't easy to choose. They've all done so well.

Well, which one gets the bonus?

They all do. They all do?

Yes, they've all done so well, I--I couldn't disappoint any of them,

so I promised them all a special treat.

With your permission, reverend mother.

My permission? For what? A holiday tomorrow.

A holiday, sister? They have earned it.

[sighs] Very well. Permission granted.

Oh, thank you, reverend mother.

Well, that takes care of the first hurdle.

Sister Bertrille.

Dare I ask, what is the 2nd?

Carlos Ramirez.

[laughing]

How can I refuse you anything?

You know that I'm putty in your hands.

Command me.

All right, Carlos.

I command you to keep tomorrow afternoon and evening free.

Absolutely free.

I'll be in San Juan at 2:30 tomorrow.

From 2:30 on, it'll be just the 2 of us.

I'll see that nothing, no one, interferes for a moment.

[Carlos] I promise.

Till tomorrow, then.

Until tomorrow.

Mmm.

[knocking on door]

[Bertrille] Hi. Anybody home?

Oh, Sister Bertrille.

And to what do I owe the honor of this visit?

I need your help.

Oh, Sister Bertrille, you are a nun.

Why do you come to me any time you need help?

You are supposed to pray.

Oh, I do both, and it works out great.

Are you busy tomorrow? Tomorrow? Yes. Tomorrow, I'm very busy.

Very, very, very busy.

Oh, I thought maybe you'd take me and my first-graders for a ride on your boat.

Your first-graders? Yes, you see,

I promised them a trip

out of San Juan, and I thought maybe a-- no, no, no. I can't

I can't leave San Juan tomorrow. Oh.

I have a very important contact coming in.

Well, don't worry, Carlos.

I'll dig up something to do in town.

Fine. Ok. Really, don't worry about it.

Well, I'll probably see you around. Bye.

See me around. Oh, no! Sister, please.

I mean, come back, sit down.

[exhaling]

We'll work something out.

[laughs]

[children yelling]

[urging children on]

Sure you have everything you need?

[Bertrille] Oh, yes. Everything except the ants.

[laughing]

Gee, I wish you were coming with us.

Well, reverend mother couldn't give the whole staff a holiday

just because you have such a brilliant, hardworking class.

Oh, by the way, do you know how to get to this plantation?

Oh, yes. Carlos drew me a map.

Well, that was thoughtful. Yes.

You see, the owner of this plantation is a good friend of his,

and Carlos called him up and arranged for us to get passage through the gate

and use of all facilities. And it's supposed to be

one of the most beautiful spots on the whole island.

I keep underestimating Señor Ramirez.

Yeah. You know something?

I honestly think if Carlos couldn't have arranged for us to get

out of town on this picnic, that he would have been more disappointed than the kids.

Hmm.

Well, have a good time. Thank you.

Have fun, children.

Bye. Bye-bye.

Don't work too hard.

[engine starting]

[children cheering]

Ninos, ninos.

Be quiet, shh. Quiet.

Sister Bertrille cannot drive in such confusion.

Well, I was prepared for this.

Ok, kids. I have some paper and some crayons.

And I want you all to draw a picture of a picnic.

And the person who draws the best picture gets a prize.

Ok, pass it out. Here's some crayons for you. Pass them around. Ok.

Where's mine, sister?

Ok, here we go.

Bums away.

"Bombs" away.

[shouting]

[car backfiring]

[telephone ringing]

Yes, Sister Ana.

Oh, yes, of course.

Good morning, Señor Ramirez.

Uh, good morning, reverend mother.

I was wondering if Sister Bertrille was still there.

Why no. She--she's just left on a picnic.

She's really gone?

Yes.

Oh, and we're most grateful, Señor,

for your arranging such a lovely day

for Sister Bertrille and the children.

Oh--oh, you'll never know what a pleasure it is, reverend mother.

Goodbye, reverend mother.

Carlos didn't mention a road with a fork in it.

Can I see that map?

What map?

I--I put it right here.

Carmelita, let me see your drawing.

I'm sorry, I didn't know it was a map.

Boy.

[Bertrille] It's beautiful.

Um, something tells me we're lost.

I think we're hearing the same voice.

What do we do?

Well, it's too late to go back.

I'm sure there's a nice picnic spot around here someplace.

But if we're lost, how do we get back without a map?

Well, I never use a map up there.

I just rely on my sense of direction.

[engine starting]

[exclaiming]

Well, uh, I guess this will have to do.

All right, kids, everyone out. Hup, hup.

Come on, ninos.

It is a beautiful spot.

Oh, yes. Very beautiful.

It would be even prettier if I knew where it was.

Now, sister, you mustn't spoil the picnic by worrying.

[grunting]

There you go.

[children playing]

[children laughing]

Well, wouldn't you know it?

Know what, sister?

I just heard a weather report.

There's a heavy storm moving in.

Oh, no.

I was thinking about Sister Bertrille and her picnickers.

Oh, yes, I know.

Well, my mother always said,

"if you want rain, you plan a picnic."

[chuckling]

[thunder rumbling]

[lightning crashing]

Looks like a storm brewing.

Maybe we ought to start back.

Ok.

Only, which way is back?

Don't worry, sister. Just keep the good thought.

That's what I figured.

[thunder rumbling]

[engine stalling]

Ok. Give it a try.

[engine stalling]

The battery, he is... Dead, sister.

Oh, we mustn't frighten the children. Oh, uh,

we could walk, huh? Walk?

Must be 20 miles by road. Half that as the crow flies.

Oh, so you must be the crow, sister, huh?

Yes, a quick hop to the nearest phone, and we're out of the woods.

You'll call reverend mother?

No, she--she wouldn't have any way of coming to get us,

and besides, she'd just worry.

So who will you call?

Who else?

Him.

Oh, sure. He's always great in a klutz.

"Clutch," sister. Why not?

Smooth sailing, Sister Bertrille.

[thunder rumbling]

[rain pattering]

[thunder rumbling]

I don't like this part of the picnic.

Where did Sister Bertrille go?

To make a phone call.

Uh, she'll be back in just a few minutes, and then we'll all go.

Just a few minutes.

[thunder clapping]

[leaves rustling]

[thunder clapping]

[rain pattering]

All right, stay in the car, kids.

Oh, boy, am I glad to see you. When will Señor Ramirez be here?

He won't. He's sending someone.

No, I never got to a phone.

You see, I--I flew into a rainstorm and it got my cornet all wet and...

[whistling]

[sputtering]

Are you hurt? No, only my feelings.

But it looks like we're stuck here for the night.

[thunder clapping]

[screaming]

Thank you.

Well, the police say there's been no report of an accident.

But captain Lopez is going to check,

and he's promised to keep in touch.

Then all we can do is wait and pray.

There's one other possibility.

Hello.

Oh--oh, this is Sister Jacqueline.

I'm sorry to disturb you, Señor Ramirez,

but I'm calling about Sister Bertrille.

I should have known.

Well, she and the children haven't gotten back from the picnic.

But that's impossible.

[Carlos] Even she wouldn't picnic on a rainy day.

Uh, if you could just t-tell us the name of your friend,

the one who owns that plantation.

Oh, Mr. Adams, yes.

[Carlos] The number is 724-7260.

Uh, 724-7260.

I-I'm sure Sister Bertrille will show up.

Come on, Danny.

Help with the wood.

Come on.

Good, very good.

Come on.

Up we go.

[shrieks]

What? What?

[Carlos] Hello.

I'm sorry to bother you again, Señor Ramirez,

but I just spoke to Mr. Adams, and he said that

Sister Bertrille and the children never reached the plantation.

[Carlos] What?

I'm afraid they might be lost.

Well, that's ridiculous.

I drew a map for her.

A 4-year-old child could have followed it.

Mr. Adams was very positive.

They didn't go through the gate.

Have you notified the police?

Yes.

Well, I'm sorry, but there's nothing I can do.

Well, I understand.

I just wondered if--if perhaps she had mentioned something about

stopping off anywhere along the way.

No, she didn't.

But of course, with Sister Bertrille, anything is possible.

Well, if you hear from her, Señor Ramirez,

would you let us know?

Yes, of course.

Uh, thank you, Sister Jacqueline. Bye-bye.

[sighing]

Nobody else ever got lost going from San Juan to the plantation.

Who is lost?

She always interrupts.

Even when she isn't here, she interrupts.

"She"?

Yeah, Sister Bertrille.

A nun?

Well, she's a friend of mine.

Not even that. She's a nuisance.

My own personal nuisance.

But, Carlos, if she's lost, the police will find her. Of course.

She isn't your responsibility. No, of course not.

[Bertrille] I need your help.

[Carlos] Oh, Sister Bertrille, you are a nun.

Why do you come to me any time you need help?

You are supposed to pray.

[Bertrille] Oh, I do both, and it works out great.

Uh, I'm sorry.

Uh, I'm sorry, Paula.

Next time, I'll rent a submarine for us.

[dialing telephone]

Hello, this is Carlos Ramirez.

Would you please get my plane ready at once?

Yes, I know there is a storm.

That's right. I am some kind of a nut.

[slamming phone]

[bird warbling]

Gee, that was a pretty good dinner for lucky pot.

"Potluck." at least we're not hungry.

[animal growling]

[all gasping]

No. But I'm not sure I can say the same thing about them.

Don't worry.

It's always darkest before the dawn.

Oh, sure.

I'm--I'm scared.

Just like a little girl.

[thunder rumbling]

Uh, I--I think I'm a little afraid myself, but...

You know what?

♪ When I find things frightening ♪

♪ like thunder and lightning ♪

♪ things don't seem so frightening ♪

♪ when I sing a song ♪

♪ I reach for a musical note ♪

♪ and I clear the ahem in my throat ♪

♪ singing out whenever I'm upset ♪

♪ it's the funniest thing ♪

♪ but the louder I sing ♪

♪ yes, the louder I sing ♪

♪ the braver I get ♪

[children] ♪ why, if something's prowling ♪

♪ or hooting and howling ♪

♪ then I do some howling of my very own ♪

♪ once my voice starts hitting the air ♪

♪ whatever it is, it better beware ♪

♪ my vibrato hasn't failed me yet ♪

♪ it's the funniest thing ♪

♪ but the louder I sing ♪

♪ yes, the louder I sing ♪

♪ the braver I get ♪

♪ la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪

[children] ♪ la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪

♪ I said, "la-la-la-la-la-la" ♪

♪ la-la-la-la-la-la- la-la-la-la! ♪

[all] ♪ now we're vocalizing ♪

♪ our courage is rising ♪

♪ just by harmonizing we surprise ourselves ♪

♪ we don't care if we happen to be ♪

♪ out of tune and a little off-key ♪

♪ we'll outsing the singers at the met ♪

♪ it's the funniest thing ♪

♪ but the louder we sing ♪

♪ yes, the louder we sing ♪

♪ the braver we get ♪

[child] It works!

[plane engine droning]

No sign of them. I'll report again later.

169 F.N. Out.

When she's around, I tell her to get lost,

and when she does, I go looking for her.

[wind howling]

Uh, why don't you go to sleep, too? I'll keep one eye open.

Both eyes, please.

Then, I'll wake you and I'll watch while you get a little eye-shut.

Marvelous. Ok.

[sighing]

[plane engine droning]

[thunder clapping]

[animal growling]

♪ When I find things frightening ♪

♪ like thunder and lightning ♪

[plane approaching]

Oh.

Help! Plane. It's a plane. It's a plane.

169 F.N. To San Juan tower, over.

[man on radio] San Juan tower to 169, go ahead.

I think I've spotted them.

Here's a fix on the position.

Wait!

We tried.

[man on radio] Tower to 169. Got it. We'll take it from here. Over.

Thanks.

169 F.N., over and out.

[engine faltering]

Well, sister,

your prayers have been answered.

Now it's my turn.

I need help.

And he didn't come back?

I tried to contact Señor Ramirez

as soon as the police told us that you had been located.

But he hasn't been heard from since he reported your position.

Oh, no. He might have crashed. He might be hurt.

Well, they're organizing a search.

Reverend mother, can't I go, too?

I've got to try and find him.

He got into this trouble looking for us.

Yes, I'm aware of that, sisters.

And, uh, yes, Sister Bertrille,

I think that you should do what you can. Oh.

Thank you, reverend mother. Oh, Sister Bertrille,

before you try to take off, you'd better put some starch in your wings.

Ok.

[Jacqueline] And so the search began.

With scientific accuracy, Sister Bertrille combed the island.

Using aerodynamic theories known best to her,

she plotted a variety of landing courses.

But to no avail.

There wasn't a sign of Señor Ramirez's plane.

The only thing she spotted in the jungle was a remote plantation.

She hoped it might hold a clue.

Mmm.

Do you know something, Carlos?

For a man who almost ended up as a statistic,

you're a pretty cool customer.

Mmm.

Did it ever occur to you that a shark could be nibbling on your ear

just as easily as my sitting here rubbing your back?

Well, it was only a few hundred yards that made the difference.

Kismet, my love.

Oh, really?

I thought it was just a faulty oil line.

For which I shall be eternally grateful.

I still can't figure out what on earth you were doing

flying around in the middle of a storm in the first place.

I was winging my way to your embrace.

And you didn't even know I existed.

I know it now.

Ah.

As a religious friend of mine would say,

that was bread cast upon the water.

[Bertrille] Yoo-hoo!

Anybody home?

Oh, why-- you didn't let me crack up and be done with it?

[Bertrille] Hello.

Anybody there?

[Bertrille shouting]

Carlos, what on earth is it?

Listen, I'm not here. You never saw me. You don't know me.

Oh, Carlos, you're alive.

[muttering]

Oh, hello.

My name's Sister Bertrille.

Uh, I--I wasn't exactly expecting a nun. Novice.

And this isn't exactly my territory,

but, you see, we've all been worried sick about Carlos.

Carlos, come on out.

We thought maybe he'd been in a terrible accident or something.

Just a forced landing on the beach. But he's all right, sister.

Oh, I'm so glad to hear that.

Honestly, Carlos,

uh, I'm so grateful.

Sister, couldn't you have possibly saved me tomorrow?

[end credits]

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