Original subtitles

(GROANS) Bailey, are you okay?

You just had the craziest dream

where I was a superhero.

How do you know what I dreamt? Um...

Greta, you're still in your super suit.

No, I'm not.

Wait a minute.

This means that you are her.

My Gretel is superhero Gretel.

(EXCLAIMING) (SHUSHING)

You're still dreaming.

I am not dreaming.

Stop lying!

Wait.

You've been lying to me all this time,

and I was your biggest fan and your best friend.

Well, I wanted to tell you, but...

Before this, I was just thinking

you were being a bad friend.

But friends don't lie to each other.

Bailey, please try to understand.

Oh, I think I understand perfectly.

I don't want to talk to you anymore.

Starting now.

Bye, Gretel. Oops.

Okay, I don't want to talk to you anymore.

Starting right now.

Bailey.

I can't believe you told Bailey.

This is... This is not good.

I should have told her from the beginning.

I'm a terrible person.

You're not a terrible person.

I'm the one who said not to tell her.

It doesn't matter.

Now he's never going to talk to me again.

MAN ON TV: ♪ Lemon, cherry lime and grape

♪ They're icy treats in a human shape

♪ Like doctors, nurses firemen, cops

♪ Everybody loves their People-Pops ♪

There's cherry syrup in the middle.

MAN: Coming soon from the Human-Shaped Ice Pop Factory,

Hamster and Gretel People-Pops.

Get 'em while they're cold.

I don't know whether to be

flattered or disturbed.

(SIGHS) Bailey and I were going to buy some

Hamster and Gretel People-Pops

and bite their heads off together

in our favorite tree.

Kev, we have good news for you.

We are taking you with us to the theater tonight.

It's an interactive theatrical murder mystery.

You'll love it.

Oh. I'm sorry, but I have a wall to stare at.

Well, somebody has to go

because we accidentally bought an extra ticket.

So you are the somebody who is going.

Who's going to watch Gretel?

We hired a babysitter.

Well, maybe the sitter can go with you guys.

We don't need babysitting.

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Gretel, can you get the door, please?

(GASPS)

GRETEL: Bailey.

BOTH: Hey, guys.

Oh, we forgot to tell you.

Roman and Michelle are coming to the show with us,

so you and Bailey get to hang out tonight

and share a babysitter.

And here she comes now.

Hey, everybody. I'm Lauren.

I hope I'm not late. Right on time.

You kids have a great night at home

while your parents go out to solve crimes.

Looks like you guys are ready for a fun night.

(YAPPING)

Hey, kiddos.

This is my very first babysitting job.

I watched a ton of tutorials

about stuff kids like to do.

Most of it I don't want to do,

so let's go bake some cookies.

Hmm, that's really nice,

but I think I'll just read my book.

And I'm just gonna stew

in my regret and self-loathing.

Oh, wow, those tutorials were way off.

I'll bake the cookies myself then.

I'll make sure you let your parents know

how nice I am and to give me five-stars. BRB!

Bailey, can we just...

(SIGHS)

Oh, I love fake crime. So exciting.

So where are we? This is the theater.

We're at the scene of the crime.

Hello, detectives.

I called 911 as soon as I found

my roommate Devon's body.

Please come in.

Ooh, I can't wait to find out who the killer is.

(GASPS) I hope it's me.

This is gonna be a long night.

Okay. I know you don't wanna talk to me, so I'm just gonna talk.

Hamster and I got our powers from aliens,

and the first person I wanted to tell was you.

But Kevin said no way, because it was too risky

and dangerous. You know, you can talk!

You could have told me yourself about who you guys are.

I don't like being in the middle. Oh.

Please tell Gretel that I am unpacking my feelings right now.

Bailey says she's unpacking... I heard.

Time for cookies.

They were supposed to be heart-shaped,

but they look more like burnt cat heads.

Enjoy!

Mmm. Tastes like betrayal.

Let's build a fort.

Gretel, grab some sheets

and Bailey, you can remove all the couch cushions.

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

Destructress, I need help.

It's "The" Destructress.

And I'm Lauren right now.

I told you not to bother me tonight.

I know, but I caught myself in a little situation.

What situation?

I'm at the human-shaped ice pop factory.

I was gonna destroy all the Hamster and Gretel ice pops

and steal the molds, you know, for spite.

But I locked myself in the freezer.

You're not supposed to do evil without me,

especially when I'm babysitting.

I was bored, and I still don't get

why you want stupid babysitting jobs

when you can just steal cash from anywhere.

Because every time we steal stuff, we get caught.

Crime literally doesn't pay.

Why don't you just punch your way out?

Okay, let's build ourselves a fort.

Keep your eyes peeled, detectives.

There are clues everywhere.

This is, I mean "was" my roommate, Derek.

He was alive when I left for work,

but now he is dead, of murder.

Is that a blood stain on your pants?

Oh, that's not a clue. I think it's gravy.

But I do have a DNA testing device.

Sadly, it only works in refrigeration,

and my fridge is on the fritz.

I can take a look at it for you.

Oh, thank you.

There's plenty of crime DNA to be found

under all these pizza boxes and assorted trash.

Plus, I think there's some clues outside.

But you can't see them through those dirty windows.

Are you kidding? Hey, Detective Bummer,

the litter box has a hidden clue.

I am not cleaning your litter box!

Are you guys coming in? Kids love forts, right?

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

(CELL PHONE BEEPS) Now what?

I'm trying to get out!

But I guess when it's below zero,

my powers aren't working so good.

Maybe it's the cold.

Seriously? (BEEPS OFF)

Who wants to go out for ice pops?

Okay. You guys chill here while I get the ice pops.

Get it? Chill.

Speaking of ice pops,

the Hamster and Gretel ones come out next week.

You still wanna eat them together?

Could you please tell Gretel

that I have unpacked my feelings.

But now I need to put them away again.

Bailey said... Feelings are not clothes.

Gretel said... Just tell her mine are.

She said to tell you... I heard her.

(ALARM RINGING)

Oh, I better go make sure the babysitter is okay.

Hamster, stay here with Bailey.

(ALARM CONTINUES RINGING)

We're cool, right?

Yeah, we're good.

Hello!

Lauren?

Where are you?

What are they doing in here?

(ALARM CONTINUES RINGING)

(ALARM STOPS)

Hey, what are you guys up to?

Uh, wreaking havoc and stealing stuff.

No, we weren't. We were just grabbing

some People-Pops and heading out. Bye.

Wait. Did you pay for those?

Well, no, but I need them.

Yeah. Out of the way! (GRUNTS)

(GRUNTING) (GASPS)

WOMAN: ♪ You think you've got it

♪ You really think you've got it

♪ You think you've got it handled

♪ Well, I think that's cute

♪ Now is your chance

♪ If you think you wanna dance

♪ You've got a shot so take it, baby just shoot

♪ If you think you're so bad

♪ Step up and show me

♪ 'Cause I think you better

♪ Take a step back

♪ You don't know me

♪ I'm the bomb I'm the best

♪ I'm better than the rest

♪ I think you better study up

♪ 'Cause this will be on the test

♪ I'm the tip of the top

♪ And if I say jump you better hop

♪ 'Cause I'm the bomb I'm the bomb

♪ I'm gonna blow you up ♪

The Destructress, a little help. (GRUNTING)

I'm innocent! I swear

I was just trying to save my dumb brother from himself.

You expect me to believe that?

Yes. I can't go to jail.

I'm babysitting two little girls,

and they're waiting for me in my car right now.

Wait. Hold on. So you're...

Babysitting is my non-evil side hustle.

Just let me go give the kids these ice pops and get them home safe.

(SIGHS)

Okay, you're free, but your brother stays.

Great. LYLE: Great?

Thank you. LYLE: That's not great!

The police will be by to pick you up later.

Lauren, you can't just leave me here!

(GROANS IN EXASPERATION)

Did you find her?

Yes. Shh. Don't say anything.

Here you go. Sorry that took so long.

LYLE: Yeah! Whoo-hoo!

I'm gonna destroy the Hamster and Gretel People-Pop molds! Yeah!

Oh, no, you won't!

Bailey! Come back!

Argh! I can't believe this.

You are not gonna destroy those molds!

Hamster and Gretel are my favorite superheroes! (GRUNTS)

Hey, don't steal what I stole!

Stay here. I'll take care of this.

(SIRENS APPROACHING)

(GRUNTING)

(LYLE GRUNTS)

(BOTH GRUNTING)

(BAILEY SCREAMS)

(LYLE GRUNTING)

(LAUGHS CUNNINGLY)

Nowhere to run.

(LAUREN GRUNTS) BAILEY AND GRETEL: Huh?

LYLE: Ooh! (GRUNTS)

(WHISPERING) I'll break you out later, jerk!

(SIGHS) BAILEY: Wow!

Lauren, you just put down a supervillain.

Nobody messes with the babysitter.

I'll put these molds back. Also, maybe

don't tell your parents about this whole part. (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

Bailey, you don't have to say anything,

but I just need you to know

that you will always be my best friend.

If you ever need me I'll be there.

Oh, Gretel, not talking to you has been the hardest thing

I've done ever in my entire life, because you're my best friend

and all I wanted to do was tell my best friend

how hard it was for me not to talk my best friend,

and I realized you had to keep it a secret. I love you, Bailey.

(SIGHS IN RELIEF) No more middleman.

Can you believe our babysitter is The Destructress?

What? Yeah, Lauren, she's The Destructress.

No way.

You know what this means?

We finally have a secret we both can keep.

Hello, girls. We're back. Did you have a good night?

Fantastic. Lauren was the best babysitter we've ever had.

You really mean that? We really mean it.

It sounds like a five-star review to me.

Oh, thank you so much. Bye, girls.

Ooh, how was the play?

Oh, superb!

You do realize that we just paid $20 a head

so we could clean this guy's house and fix his appliances?

Maybe that was the mystery.

Let's go again next week.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

♪ Hamster and Gretel

♪ It's Hamster

♪ Hamster and Gretel ♪

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0