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♪
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MEL BROOKS: "The Oslo Peace Accords."
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NORWEGIAN MAN: This is really historic.
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We have agreed in principle
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to a real and everlasting peace accord
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between Israel and Palestine.
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Now, if I could just get
some general agreement noises
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from the room. Like, just a sort of...
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[ALL MURMURING IN AGREEMENT]
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Good, good, and... perfect!
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Good, thank you. That was just right.
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Okay, now I'm gonna get this
ready for the signings, ja?
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There's just one more thing concerning
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who gets to claim the
homeland of hummus,
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but we can iron that afterward. Ja.
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[TENSE MUSIC]
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[CONCERNED MURMURING]
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This is not a small thing.
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We must settle on who
created hummus before we sign,
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or we can never have true peace.
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- Of course.
- This is very simple, really,
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when you think about it because
Israel, you know, created hummus.
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[CONDESCENDING LAUGHING]
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I didn't realize I was watching
Family Matters right now.
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What are you talking about?
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Oh, because you're like Steve Urkel,
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in that you are making me laugh.
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- "Did I do that?" No.
- [SPECTATOR GASPS]
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My Palestinian ancestors did that!
30
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What do you think the Jews
were eating in the desert
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for 40 years, Amir? Wet sand?
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That's exactly how you
describe Israeli hummus.
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- Fuck you, man.
- Oh, fuck you.
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Ooh, hoo, hoo, hoo!
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- [MURMURING]
- Guys, guys, guys, come on now.
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We agreed the only F word we're
gonna use in this room is friendship.
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Go friendship yourself.
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Excuse me, but, uh, make no mistake.
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Egypt created hummus.
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[ALL LAUGHING]
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Yes, of course! You know what...
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I have heard enough, okay?
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Because it is...
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Greece who has invented hummus!
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It's as Greek as naked wrestling.
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And may I just say, Christos,
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that the only thing the Greeks invented
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was being a shitty little asshole.
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- [MURMURING]
- Oh, snap.
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Everybody knows that Turkey
is the home of hummus.
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Turkey is the home of hummus?
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- TURKISH AMBASSADOR: That's right.
- Okay. This is rich, okay?
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Because your country is called Turkey,
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but you make absolutely
no claim to that food.
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- Don't want. Don't want it.
- CHRISTOS: Okay.
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What you should be called instead
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- is Bullshit.
- [LAUGHTER]
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Because that is all you make.
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Please, please, no, no, no. You guys...
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And I think your
country is called Greece
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because your food is so greasy.
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Oh no! Spanakopita is... oily, okay?
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It's not greasy.
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Hey, hey! Why don't we sit down, right?
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Why are we standing? There's
no need to stand! Guys, guys,
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I don't even know why we're
discussing this, to be honest.
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I put it in there as a joke.
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[LAUGHS] It was just like a
little funny thing before lunch.
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- Lunch!
- AMIR: Ah, yes! Yes.
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We are going to sign whatever
the hell you want us to sign,
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and we're going to
get the F out of here.
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Oh, yes! Wonderful. Yes, let's
sign it, please! Oh God...
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We'll just go to my
place, the Israeli embassy.
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- We'll have lunch.
- CHRISTOS: Greek embassy lunch is on me!
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TURKISH AMBASSADOR: The
Turkish embassy is open.
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NORWEGIAN AMBASSADOR: Well,
we can also just eat here,
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- at the Norwegian embassy.
- ISRAELI AMBASSADOR: Fuck you.
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Well, okay. More sheep's head
for me then, right? [LAUGHS]
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[EPIC THEME PLAYING]
80
00:03:05,727 --> 00:03:08,730
MEL: History of The World, Part II!
81
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[CHEERFUL THEME PLAYING]
82
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♪ From Barbados to
Brooklyn, then to DC ♪
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♪ She's the first Black congresswoman ♪
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♪ She's Shirley ♪
85
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♪ It's been a long hard road,
but hope was never lost ♪
86
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♪ 'Cause that girl Shirley's
unbought and unbossed ♪
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♪ Ooh, ooh, Shirley ♪
88
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[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
89
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ANNOUNCER: Shirley! is filmed in
front of a live Black audience.
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♪ Yeah... ♪
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Wow! This place is so futuristic!
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Well, that's 'cause,
for our anniversary,
93
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I wanted to take you out
of this world. [LAUGHS]
94
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- I'm talkin' hotel sex.
- [AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
95
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I promise, no work this weekend.
96
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No campaigning,
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no speeches, no candidate.
98
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- I am just your wife.
- [LAUGHS] Right.
99
00:04:06,705 --> 00:04:08,749
- [CONRAD CLEARS THROAT]
- [AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
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What about that jacket?
101
00:04:10,542 --> 00:04:12,586
It's the only one I have with pockets.
102
00:04:12,586 --> 00:04:14,087
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
103
00:04:14,838 --> 00:04:17,716
- Welcome to the Watergate Hotel.
- Yes, uh,
104
00:04:17,716 --> 00:04:19,510
reservation's under Chisholm.
105
00:04:19,510 --> 00:04:21,845
I booked a room with
a heart-shaped bathtub
106
00:04:21,845 --> 00:04:24,181
and a fireplace that roars.
107
00:04:24,181 --> 00:04:27,100
Yes, it's in the notes.
We don't have that.
108
00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:28,936
- What? Come on, now!
- [AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
109
00:04:28,936 --> 00:04:31,188
- I made this reservation weeks ago!
- Gloria?
110
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- The most famous feminist in the world?
- [AUDIENCE CHEERING]
111
00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:35,234
Gloria!
112
00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:39,530
Shirley Chisholm? Are you
here for our conference?
113
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Am I?
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Does a woman only make 56 cents
for every dollar a man makes?
115
00:04:44,034 --> 00:04:46,537
- [AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
- [LAUGHS] Shirley!
116
00:04:46,537 --> 00:04:48,997
Of course, I'm here for
your conference! Yeah!
117
00:04:48,997 --> 00:04:51,500
Well, it's so great that you're here,
118
00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:53,252
and I will see you in Ballroom One.
119
00:04:53,252 --> 00:04:55,587
- Absolutely! I'll see you inside.
- Okay.
120
00:04:55,587 --> 00:04:58,465
Twin beds? Come on,
now, that's not cool.
121
00:04:58,465 --> 00:05:01,218
- Shirley Chisholm.
- [AUDIENCE CHEERING]
122
00:05:01,802 --> 00:05:03,470
Reverend Jesse Jackson?
123
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:07,224
Shirley, now, you are a
sister that is no-nonsense.
124
00:05:07,224 --> 00:05:10,602
I can only assume you are
here for our conference.
125
00:05:10,602 --> 00:05:11,854
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
126
00:05:11,854 --> 00:05:13,856
Jesse, I am here,
127
00:05:13,856 --> 00:05:15,649
and I got your back.
128
00:05:15,649 --> 00:05:18,861
I came for your conference.
Yes, it is Black.
129
00:05:18,861 --> 00:05:20,696
- [AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
- I cannot wait
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00:05:20,696 --> 00:05:22,531
to share my ideas that are new.
131
00:05:22,531 --> 00:05:26,493
I look forward to seeing
you in Ballroom Number Two.
132
00:05:26,493 --> 00:05:28,412
- Thank you.
- [AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
133
00:05:28,412 --> 00:05:31,206
Shirley, baby, look, I'm gettin'
a bad vibe about this place.
134
00:05:31,206 --> 00:05:34,001
- Let's just go home.
- No, we can't! We just started the farce!
135
00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:35,752
- The farce?
- Uh, I mean,
136
00:05:35,752 --> 00:05:37,379
th-th-the force.
137
00:05:37,379 --> 00:05:40,841
The force of our love and romance.
138
00:05:40,841 --> 00:05:42,259
- Just get the key!
- Okay.
139
00:05:42,259 --> 00:05:44,011
Okay, all right. I'll take
the key, I'll take the key.
140
00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:47,347
ANNOUNCER: Coming up on the
next episode of Shirley!
141
00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:51,018
Flo, the feminists and the Black
Caucus are here at the Watergate.
142
00:05:51,018 --> 00:05:53,103
I wanna get them both to endorse me.
143
00:05:53,103 --> 00:05:54,980
I need you to bring me
two different outfits.
144
00:05:54,980 --> 00:05:57,524
While I'm downstairs,
I need you to stay here
145
00:05:57,524 --> 00:05:59,151
and keep Conrad in the bathtub.
146
00:05:59,151 --> 00:06:01,820
CONRAD: Shirley, should I
put on one of those mud masks?
147
00:06:01,820 --> 00:06:02,821
It's all in the mole.
148
00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:04,865
[IMITATING SHIRLEY]:
That sounds good, baby!
149
00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:05,865
[NORMAL VOICE]: I got this, girl.
150
00:06:08,744 --> 00:06:10,662
MEL: "Typhoid Mary"
151
00:06:10,662 --> 00:06:12,039
Don't breathe on me, please.
152
00:06:12,789 --> 00:06:16,793
[LIVELY CELTIC MUSIC]
153
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Hey! It's me, Mary,
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00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:22,257
or as I'm known in some
circles, Typhoid Mary.
155
00:06:22,257 --> 00:06:26,220
And welcome to my cooking
channel, "Eat, Drink and be Mary."
156
00:06:26,220 --> 00:06:29,431
Just to catch you up, I have
been accused of giving typhoid,
157
00:06:29,431 --> 00:06:32,684
a highly contagious and fatal
disease spread through food,
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00:06:32,684 --> 00:06:34,561
to hundreds of people
that I've cooked for,
159
00:06:34,561 --> 00:06:36,522
which, you know, while it's ridiculous,
160
00:06:36,522 --> 00:06:39,274
I do appreciate the
opportunity to create a brand.
161
00:06:39,274 --> 00:06:42,361
Now, today we are going to be
making corned beef and cabbage,
162
00:06:42,361 --> 00:06:43,820
a classic Irish dish.
163
00:06:43,820 --> 00:06:46,990
As traditional to Ireland
as alcoholism and shame.
164
00:06:47,491 --> 00:06:51,370
[RACKING COUGH]
165
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[PANTING, GASPING] [WIPING HANDS]
166
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- So, before we get going...
- [STOMACH GURGLING]
167
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Uh-oh! I got something cookin'. [FARTS]
168
00:07:00,879 --> 00:07:03,924
And no, it's not in the
oven. It's in my pants.
169
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:05,676
[FARTS] I gotta go have a shit.
170
00:07:05,676 --> 00:07:08,095
Don't you go anywhere. Love you!
171
00:07:11,473 --> 00:07:15,310
MEL: And now, back to "The
Last Supper Sessions."
172
00:07:15,310 --> 00:07:17,521
- [GUITAR STRUMMING]
- LUKE [SINGS FALSETTO]: Frogs and locusts!
173
00:07:17,521 --> 00:07:20,899
♪ Frogs and locusts, so in love ♪
174
00:07:20,899 --> 00:07:23,443
MARK: I think the whole
thing would work better lower.
175
00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:24,820
LUKE: Too high for me, mate.
176
00:07:25,696 --> 00:07:28,740
How come Jesus isn't wearing any shoes?
177
00:07:28,740 --> 00:07:32,536
Maybe you should be asking
why you're wearing shoes.
178
00:07:32,536 --> 00:07:34,329
[STRUMMING CONTINUES]
179
00:07:34,329 --> 00:07:35,414
Far out, man.
180
00:07:35,414 --> 00:07:36,999
- [STOPS STRUMMING]
- Ah! This is so frustrating.
181
00:07:36,999 --> 00:07:38,834
- Nothing's working!
- MARK: I think,
182
00:07:38,834 --> 00:07:41,753
respectfully, you need to,
uh, pick up your accent, mate.
183
00:07:41,753 --> 00:07:43,005
You're from Nazareth.
184
00:07:43,005 --> 00:07:45,340
Mm, no. I'm from North Carolina.
185
00:07:45,340 --> 00:07:47,593
Nobody told me that when
I signed up for this,
186
00:07:47,593 --> 00:07:49,011
I had to have a Liverpoolian accent!
187
00:07:49,011 --> 00:07:50,429
[NO ACCENT]: Are we
dropping the accent?!
188
00:07:50,429 --> 00:07:52,181
- Yes! We're dropping the accent!
- MARK: No.
189
00:07:52,181 --> 00:07:53,640
- Oh, thank God!
- MARK: No. No!
190
00:07:53,640 --> 00:07:55,100
We're committing to the bit!
191
00:07:55,100 --> 00:07:58,395
- We're keeping the accents!
- Lads, lads, lads, listen!
192
00:07:58,395 --> 00:08:00,063
We're just in a bit of a rut.
193
00:08:00,063 --> 00:08:02,357
We need a pick-me-up, that's all. Okay?
194
00:08:02,357 --> 00:08:03,901
Is it possible
195
00:08:03,901 --> 00:08:05,360
to turn this goat milk to rosé?
196
00:08:06,403 --> 00:08:08,030
Mate, no.
197
00:08:08,030 --> 00:08:10,949
[SCOUSE ACCENT]: [LAUGHS]
Hey, Jesus! Look who I found!
198
00:08:10,949 --> 00:08:12,075
Yes!
199
00:08:12,075 --> 00:08:14,144
- It's Lazarus!
- [CHEERING]
200
00:08:14,144 --> 00:08:15,162
[GASPS]
201
00:08:15,162 --> 00:08:17,247
- JESUS: L.L.! Lazarus! Yes!
- MARY: Lazzie!
202
00:08:17,247 --> 00:08:20,000
I played with Laz out in
Galilee. He's wild, man. Wild.
203
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:23,629
Hey now, that show was out of sight!
204
00:08:23,629 --> 00:08:24,838
- MARK: Oh.
- [LOUD LAUGH]
205
00:08:24,838 --> 00:08:28,008
- [LAUGHING]
- Wow... Wow.
206
00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:30,219
Hey, wh-where's Judas?
207
00:08:30,219 --> 00:08:32,137
- [STRUMMING]
- LUKE: Well, you know...
208
00:08:32,137 --> 00:08:34,556
- [AWKWARD MUMBLING]
- Judas left the band.
209
00:08:34,556 --> 00:08:37,267
- He did.
- And so, we're missing a whole...
210
00:08:37,267 --> 00:08:40,896
- [STRUMMING CONTINUES]
- dimension of sound, you know? So...
211
00:08:40,896 --> 00:08:43,232
JESUS: We really haven't spoke about it.
212
00:08:43,232 --> 00:08:44,858
Why don't you play
something for us, mate?
213
00:08:44,858 --> 00:08:46,735
- LAZARUS: Me?
- JESUS: Yeah, mate. I mean,
214
00:08:46,735 --> 00:08:48,237
we'd love to have you, mate.
215
00:08:48,237 --> 00:08:50,989
MARK: You could give us the
extra dimension we're looking for.
216
00:08:50,989 --> 00:08:53,450
Wow. Uh, yeah, I guess I
could try something, I don't...
217
00:08:53,450 --> 00:08:54,743
See what it's all about.
218
00:08:54,743 --> 00:08:57,162
- [LIVELY ELECTRIC PIANO]
- JESUS: Bring us back from the dead, mate.
219
00:08:57,162 --> 00:08:59,206
- Yes!
- MARK: Yes! Wow.
220
00:08:59,206 --> 00:09:01,416
- [IMPRESSED CHATTER]
- That's good.
221
00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:02,751
- Pure butter.
- [PROJECTOR CLICKS]
222
00:09:02,751 --> 00:09:04,711
♪ Don't get me down ♪
223
00:09:04,711 --> 00:09:06,421
♪
224
00:09:06,421 --> 00:09:08,006
♪ From the cross, yeah ♪
225
00:09:08,006 --> 00:09:09,383
[OBNOXIOUS BLEATING]
226
00:09:09,383 --> 00:09:11,385
♪ Don't get me down ♪
227
00:09:11,385 --> 00:09:13,846
♪ I came to die here for your sins ♪
228
00:09:13,846 --> 00:09:15,514
[BLEATING CONTINUES]
229
00:09:15,514 --> 00:09:17,808
♪ Don't get me down ♪
230
00:09:17,808 --> 00:09:19,768
- [WEAK LAUGH]
- [CLAPPING]
231
00:09:19,768 --> 00:09:21,019
Hey, Jude.
232
00:09:21,019 --> 00:09:24,523
You know, I want you to know I
had my come-to-Jesus moment, and...
233
00:09:27,192 --> 00:09:29,444
Told me to come back to Jesus.
234
00:09:32,197 --> 00:09:34,199
Of course, lad. You're forgiven.
235
00:09:35,951 --> 00:09:36,951
Honk!
236
00:09:40,539 --> 00:09:42,833
Honk if I love Jesus, and I do.
237
00:09:42,833 --> 00:09:45,752
MARK: All are friends
again. There we go.
238
00:09:45,752 --> 00:09:47,546
All right, so have we decided
where we're gonna play?
239
00:09:47,546 --> 00:09:49,006
JESUS: Oh...
240
00:09:49,006 --> 00:09:51,175
Why don't we just do
it on the bloody roof?
241
00:09:51,175 --> 00:09:52,759
Be great for my hair, wouldn't it?
242
00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,136
Your hair would look great.
243
00:09:54,136 --> 00:09:56,013
Your hair would look problematic.
244
00:09:57,222 --> 00:09:58,515
- Yeah.
- MARK: All right then.
245
00:09:58,515 --> 00:10:00,475
- JESUS: All right.
- LUKE: There's my man Judas.
246
00:10:00,475 --> 00:10:02,019
It's the end of the session!
247
00:10:03,312 --> 00:10:06,106
- [FARTING, WATER SPLASHING]
- MARY: Oh! That's straight water.
248
00:10:06,106 --> 00:10:09,276
There's no substance to that at
all. It just fell right out of there.
249
00:10:09,276 --> 00:10:10,903
Oh! Woo! [FART, SPLASH]
250
00:10:10,903 --> 00:10:12,696
[SIGHS] I don't have any toilet paper!
251
00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:14,406
Get this guy right here...
252
00:10:14,406 --> 00:10:16,491
Ha, resourceful!
253
00:10:16,491 --> 00:10:17,784
[VIEW COUNT CLICKING]
254
00:10:17,784 --> 00:10:20,204
[GROANING, YELLING] [FARTING, SPLASHING]
255
00:10:20,204 --> 00:10:21,288
Ow!
256
00:10:22,414 --> 00:10:24,833
♪ Ooh, ooh, Shirley... ♪
257
00:10:24,833 --> 00:10:26,835
[STUDIO AUDIENCE APPLAUDS]
258
00:10:26,835 --> 00:10:29,505
JESSE JACKSON: The white
politicians continue to fuck us,
259
00:10:29,505 --> 00:10:32,716
and that's why we started our
own Black political caucus.
260
00:10:32,716 --> 00:10:33,884
That's "fuck us."
261
00:10:34,510 --> 00:10:35,886
- Jesse!
- Shirley!
262
00:10:35,886 --> 00:10:37,930
What's happenin', Jesse? Gimme five!
263
00:10:37,930 --> 00:10:39,348
Black hand side!
264
00:10:39,348 --> 00:10:40,599
Down low?
265
00:10:40,599 --> 00:10:42,059
You're too slow!
266
00:10:42,059 --> 00:10:43,894
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
267
00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:46,772
So, as a member of the Black community,
268
00:10:46,772 --> 00:10:49,149
I was hoping that I would get
your support in the election.
269
00:10:50,275 --> 00:10:51,568
Well, maybe you will,
270
00:10:51,568 --> 00:10:53,695
if you give a speech at the podium.
271
00:10:53,695 --> 00:10:55,656
- Pig in a blanket?
- Not for me.
272
00:10:55,656 --> 00:10:57,658
- Too much sodium.
- [STUDIO AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
273
00:10:57,658 --> 00:10:59,618
How do you do that?
[LAUGHS] Doesn't matter.
274
00:10:59,618 --> 00:11:01,078
Why don't we do it right now?
275
00:11:01,078 --> 00:11:02,538
[IMITATES TIRE SCREECH]
276
00:11:02,538 --> 00:11:05,624
I'd love to hear you speak,
uh, that would be fun,
277
00:11:05,624 --> 00:11:07,209
but you cannot take the podium
278
00:11:07,209 --> 00:11:09,753
until Mr. Charlie Rangel is done.
279
00:11:09,753 --> 00:11:13,715
- [CONRAD SCAT SINGING]
- [WATER SPLASHING]
280
00:11:13,715 --> 00:11:16,718
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
281
00:11:18,053 --> 00:11:21,056
- Did you lock up either endorsement?
- [WHISPERS]: Not yet!
282
00:11:21,056 --> 00:11:24,476
I'm telling you, a song
will really win them over.
283
00:11:24,476 --> 00:11:27,187
No, no. No song.
284
00:11:28,146 --> 00:11:30,232
No gimmicks. No catchphrases.
285
00:11:30,732 --> 00:11:32,442
And you can Shirley count on that!
286
00:11:32,442 --> 00:11:34,653
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
287
00:11:34,653 --> 00:11:36,780
- So, how's it going with Conrad?
- [WATER SPLASHING]
288
00:11:36,780 --> 00:11:38,240
CONRAD: Shirley, who are you talking to?
289
00:11:40,075 --> 00:11:41,618
BOTH: Nobody, baby!
290
00:11:41,618 --> 00:11:44,246
- [AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
- [GRUMBLING]
291
00:11:44,246 --> 00:11:45,390
CONRAD: You better be getting ready
292
00:11:45,391 --> 00:11:48,208
'cause I am shaving
myself clean in here.
293
00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:50,794
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
294
00:11:50,794 --> 00:11:52,337
You owe me for this.
295
00:11:52,337 --> 00:11:54,089
[IMITATING]: Oh, that's good, baby!
296
00:11:54,089 --> 00:11:56,884
I love you silky smooth.
297
00:11:56,884 --> 00:11:57,885
[STUDIO AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
298
00:11:57,885 --> 00:12:04,141
ALL: Burn, baby, burn!
299
00:12:04,141 --> 00:12:07,144
[ALL CHEERING AND APPLAUDING]
300
00:12:07,144 --> 00:12:09,479
GLORIA STEINEM: Yes, yes, yes!
301
00:12:09,479 --> 00:12:10,772
- Shirley!
- SHIRLEY: Yeah! So, Gloria,
302
00:12:10,772 --> 00:12:13,609
are you ready to take that
photograph now for the magazine?
303
00:12:13,609 --> 00:12:14,945
You know what, in a few
minutes because right now,
304
00:12:14,946 --> 00:12:16,153
we're burning our bras.
305
00:12:16,153 --> 00:12:19,072
- Oh! Well, uh, d... count me in!
- Yes!
306
00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:20,741
[ALL CHEERING]
307
00:12:20,741 --> 00:12:22,826
- That smells like freedom.
- Yes. Oh!
308
00:12:22,826 --> 00:12:25,245
[CHEERING CONTINUES]
309
00:12:26,455 --> 00:12:29,041
Um, so how long does this take?
310
00:12:29,041 --> 00:12:32,211
The D cups take about four minutes,
and the B cups about two minutes.
311
00:12:32,211 --> 00:12:35,672
Okay, I would say this
is like a C-average room,
312
00:12:35,672 --> 00:12:38,050
so three minutes, got it! Okay.
313
00:12:38,050 --> 00:12:40,135
- [CLAPPING]
- GLORIA: Yes, throw them in, women!
314
00:12:40,135 --> 00:12:42,513
- Throw them in!
- [CHEERING]
315
00:12:42,888 --> 00:12:45,891
♪
316
00:12:47,226 --> 00:12:50,229
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
317
00:12:56,985 --> 00:12:59,571
Write this down. "We want James Brown."
318
00:12:59,571 --> 00:13:01,323
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
319
00:13:01,323 --> 00:13:03,659
I don't wanna push,
I'm not gonna preach,
320
00:13:03,659 --> 00:13:06,119
but I'm going up there
and giving a speech.
321
00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:07,538
I want you up there
322
00:13:07,538 --> 00:13:10,249
for the votes you will
earn, but I'm sorry to say...
323
00:13:11,542 --> 00:13:12,876
it is Ron Dellums' turn.
324
00:13:12,876 --> 00:13:14,711
- Ron Dellums!
- [CLAPPING]
325
00:13:14,711 --> 00:13:17,130
- Damn it!
- [STUDIO LAUGHTER]
326
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:19,842
♪
327
00:13:20,217 --> 00:13:24,471
GLORIA: Now, are we making
it a walk, or a march? Oh!
328
00:13:24,471 --> 00:13:27,182
Oh, Shirley. You changed...
329
00:13:27,182 --> 00:13:28,684
Yes.
330
00:13:28,684 --> 00:13:30,644
Oh, um... [NERVOUS LAUGH]
331
00:13:30,644 --> 00:13:32,312
Burning that bra felt so good,
332
00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:34,940
I just burned the rest of my outfit.
333
00:13:34,940 --> 00:13:37,943
- [AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
- Can we please take that picture now?
334
00:13:37,943 --> 00:13:39,194
GLORIA: Yes. Everyone!
335
00:13:39,194 --> 00:13:41,822
Photo with presidential
candidate Shirley Chisholm!
336
00:13:41,822 --> 00:13:43,490
Get in here, Bella!
337
00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:45,242
- Let's do it. Let's go. Here we go.
- [LAUGHTER]
338
00:13:45,242 --> 00:13:46,827
- [FIRE ALARM RINGING]
- Oh, my God!
339
00:13:46,827 --> 00:13:48,245
Fire! Fire!
340
00:13:48,245 --> 00:13:50,289
- Everybody get out!
- [PANICKED SCREAMING]
341
00:13:50,289 --> 00:13:54,001
L-let's take the picture first!
Come back! Let's ta... Ladies, let...
342
00:13:54,001 --> 00:13:55,200
Let's take the picture first! Let's...
343
00:13:55,201 --> 00:13:57,504
[SIGHS] If we don't take the photo,
344
00:13:57,504 --> 00:13:59,131
the men win!
345
00:13:59,131 --> 00:14:01,884
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
346
00:14:01,884 --> 00:14:04,511
[ALARM CONTINUES]
347
00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:07,848
This is my best bra.
348
00:14:07,848 --> 00:14:09,641
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
349
00:14:09,641 --> 00:14:11,059
- [CHEERING]
- ANNOUNCER: Shirley! will be back
350
00:14:11,059 --> 00:14:13,979
after some commercials
starring OJ Simpson.
351
00:14:18,734 --> 00:14:21,236
MEL: "The Mongolian Empire"
352
00:14:21,236 --> 00:14:23,947
[ASIATIC MUSICG]
353
00:14:23,947 --> 00:14:27,618
Kublai Khan controlled
more land than any person
354
00:14:27,618 --> 00:14:30,454
in the history of the world! Part II.
355
00:14:30,454 --> 00:14:32,414
But, as the saying goes,
356
00:14:32,414 --> 00:14:36,376
"Behind every great
man is 10,000 women."
357
00:14:36,376 --> 00:14:38,170
[REAL HOUSEWIVES-ESQUE THEME]
358
00:14:38,170 --> 00:14:39,530
CHABI: I'm Chabi.
359
00:14:39,530 --> 00:14:41,882
I'm not a wife of Kublai Khan.
360
00:14:41,882 --> 00:14:44,092
I'm his number-one wife.
361
00:14:44,092 --> 00:14:46,887
EHRI: I'm Ehri, and in Xanadu,
362
00:14:46,887 --> 00:14:49,973
you Xana- don't wanna cross me.
363
00:14:49,973 --> 00:14:52,809
NAMBUI: My name is Nambui,
and I'm grateful for the Khan.
364
00:14:52,809 --> 00:14:55,395
Now my parents have fresh
meat to eat every day!
365
00:14:55,395 --> 00:14:58,565
CRYSTAL: I'm Crystal, and these
other concs don't scare me
366
00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:00,817
because I'm from Beverly Hills.
367
00:15:00,817 --> 00:15:03,904
- KAYLA: I'm Kayla.
- KAYLAH: And I'm Kaylah.
368
00:15:03,904 --> 00:15:06,865
BOTH: And we're double the
fun and double the trouble.
369
00:15:06,865 --> 00:15:08,367
[SHEEP BLEATS]
370
00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:13,872
[BLEATS]
371
00:15:13,872 --> 00:15:15,457
WOMEN: And we're the Real Concubines...
372
00:15:15,457 --> 00:15:17,084
MORE WOMEN: And we're
the Real Concubines...
373
00:15:17,084 --> 00:15:18,418
EVEN MORE: And we're
the Real Concubines...
374
00:15:18,418 --> 00:15:22,364
And we're the Real
Concubines of Kublai Khan!
375
00:15:22,364 --> 00:15:23,382
♪
376
00:15:23,382 --> 00:15:27,344
Welcome to The Real Concubines
of Kublai Khan Reunion.
377
00:15:27,344 --> 00:15:29,680
I'm your host, Andy Khan.
378
00:15:29,680 --> 00:15:31,181
We have a great show tonight.
379
00:15:31,181 --> 00:15:33,183
Kublai Khan has so many wives,
380
00:15:33,183 --> 00:15:35,185
and we have so little time,
381
00:15:35,185 --> 00:15:37,896
so I wanna jump right into it.
382
00:15:37,896 --> 00:15:39,731
- Chabi!
- Hey, Andy.
383
00:15:39,731 --> 00:15:41,984
Recently, you and Ehri
have had a little drama.
384
00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:43,777
There's no drama, Andy.
385
00:15:43,777 --> 00:15:46,738
My son is 100% heir to the throne.
386
00:15:46,738 --> 00:15:47,906
The Oracle confirmed it.
387
00:15:47,906 --> 00:15:49,954
- Nope.
- CHABI: And Ehri is just freaked out
388
00:15:49,955 --> 00:15:53,287
because she's insecure about her
relationship with our husband.
389
00:15:53,287 --> 00:15:55,080
[LAUGHS] Well, you know what they say.
390
00:15:55,080 --> 00:15:57,457
"Oracles are for whore-acles."
391
00:15:57,457 --> 00:15:58,500
- [GASPS, LAUGHS]
- CHABI: You know,
392
00:15:58,500 --> 00:16:01,378
Kublai calls you his
number two for a reason.
393
00:16:01,378 --> 00:16:02,838
You stink like a pile of dung!
394
00:16:02,838 --> 00:16:04,715
You don't know what Koob says
395
00:16:04,715 --> 00:16:07,426
or does to me the two
minutes a week we're together.
396
00:16:07,426 --> 00:16:09,386
Two minutes? Only two
minutes? I get four.
397
00:16:09,386 --> 00:16:11,930
Now, this is not the
first time Chabi and Ehri
398
00:16:11,930 --> 00:16:14,349
have gone at each other. Everyone agrees
399
00:16:14,349 --> 00:16:17,853
the craziest moment of the season
400
00:16:17,853 --> 00:16:21,815
was the Festival of the Blood Moon
Charity Gala. Let's take a look.
401
00:16:22,316 --> 00:16:25,194
How dare you bring your son here.
402
00:16:25,194 --> 00:16:28,447
This is my son Travis's
first Blood Moon Festival.
403
00:16:28,447 --> 00:16:31,158
You know what? It just so happens
that this is also my son,
404
00:16:31,158 --> 00:16:33,827
who's also named Travis's
first Blood Moon Festival,
405
00:16:33,827 --> 00:16:35,621
so you need to back off.
406
00:16:35,621 --> 00:16:37,706
And you get that stinking
finger outta my face.
407
00:16:37,706 --> 00:16:39,791
I swear to God, I don't
know where it's been.
408
00:16:39,791 --> 00:16:42,461
It's stinking 'cause it's been
up our husband's ass [BLEEP],
409
00:16:42,461 --> 00:16:45,005
and maybe if yours had been,
your son would be the actual heir.
410
00:16:45,005 --> 00:16:48,884
- [LADIES GASPING, YELLING]
- Sup, ladies! Daddy's home.
411
00:16:48,884 --> 00:16:50,802
[INDISTINCT ARGUING]
412
00:16:50,802 --> 00:16:52,012
Oh shit...
413
00:16:54,181 --> 00:16:57,518
[ARGUING, BLEEPING CONTINUES]
414
00:16:57,518 --> 00:16:59,978
EHRI: I am the mother of
the spawn of Khan, bitch!
415
00:16:59,978 --> 00:17:02,523
- You look like a fool. You look like a fool
- You look like a fool!
416
00:17:02,523 --> 00:17:04,358
- [BLEATING]
- Shut the [BLEEP] up!
417
00:17:04,358 --> 00:17:05,442
- Flopsy, Flopsy, stop.
- [BLEATING]
418
00:17:05,442 --> 00:17:06,443
Bitch, I coulda taken you!
419
00:17:06,443 --> 00:17:08,278
[SHOUTING, BLEEPING]
420
00:17:08,278 --> 00:17:09,530
I'm sorry you're a virgin!
421
00:17:09,530 --> 00:17:12,074
- I'm a virgin? I have a son!
- ANDY: Ladies, ladies, sit down.
422
00:17:12,074 --> 00:17:14,576
Everyone stop, everyone stop. Ladies!
423
00:17:14,576 --> 00:17:16,620
That clip did give us
424
00:17:16,620 --> 00:17:19,373
one of the biggest memes of the season.
425
00:17:19,373 --> 00:17:23,001
It's been rewoven over 10 times!
426
00:17:23,544 --> 00:17:25,337
"I want to talk to the manager."
427
00:17:25,337 --> 00:17:28,632
"I am the manager." Amazing.
428
00:17:28,924 --> 00:17:31,051
Nambui, what about you?
429
00:17:31,051 --> 00:17:33,595
Are you Team Chabi or Team Ehri?
430
00:17:33,595 --> 00:17:36,557
You know, I have to say, I liked
it better when we were all a team.
431
00:17:36,557 --> 00:17:39,268
You know, all of us concs have a bond.
432
00:17:39,268 --> 00:17:41,603
Or as I call it, a concu-bond.
433
00:17:42,688 --> 00:17:44,106
[VOICE BREAKING]: You know what?
434
00:17:44,106 --> 00:17:46,358
[GASPS] You are so right.
435
00:17:46,358 --> 00:17:48,610
[GASPS] And I had so lost sight of that.
436
00:17:48,610 --> 00:17:50,946
Me, too! Like...
437
00:17:50,946 --> 00:17:52,739
You guys are my sister-in-laws.
438
00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:54,366
Like, you're actually...
439
00:17:54,783 --> 00:17:56,326
You're my sister wives.
440
00:17:56,326 --> 00:17:57,327
- NAMBUI: Yes!
- [GASPS]
441
00:17:57,327 --> 00:18:00,539
Crystal, I gotta say, I've
never seen you cry before.
442
00:18:00,539 --> 00:18:02,332
Oh, I'm not crying about them.
443
00:18:02,332 --> 00:18:05,711
I'm crying because the Italian
marble for my Malibu reno,
444
00:18:05,711 --> 00:18:07,462
it's on back order.
445
00:18:07,462 --> 00:18:09,631
- [ALL GASP]
- Aww.
446
00:18:09,631 --> 00:18:13,302
Well, this one ended
on a really sweet note.
447
00:18:13,302 --> 00:18:14,803
Uh, before we wrap things up,
448
00:18:14,803 --> 00:18:18,307
does anyone have a small
business they wanna promote?
449
00:18:18,307 --> 00:18:20,559
Okay, all of you.
450
00:18:20,559 --> 00:18:22,603
- Uh, Chabi?
- Thank you, Andy.
451
00:18:22,603 --> 00:18:26,273
I'm so excited to announce
that my new hat line,
452
00:18:26,273 --> 00:18:29,401
"Shy By Chabi," is dropping soon.
453
00:18:29,401 --> 00:18:32,988
It's perfect for the
nomadic, but sassy, lifestyle.
454
00:18:32,988 --> 00:18:34,448
That's great. When are they coming out?
455
00:18:34,448 --> 00:18:36,491
September... [BEADS RATTLING]
456
00:18:36,491 --> 00:18:39,077
Sum... Er... Spring. Spring.
457
00:18:39,077 --> 00:18:40,454
How about you, Ehri?
458
00:18:40,454 --> 00:18:43,540
I'm so thrilled to announce the
drop of my new alcohol brand,
459
00:18:43,540 --> 00:18:45,918
Skinny Khan Margaritas.
460
00:18:45,918 --> 00:18:48,086
- [RATTLING]
- Zero sugar, zero drama.
461
00:18:48,086 --> 00:18:50,547
Bitch, you better tell your
hat to shut the [BLEEP] up!
462
00:18:51,089 --> 00:18:53,884
WOMEN: And we're the Real
Concubines of Kublai Khan!
463
00:18:56,011 --> 00:18:57,888
MARY: Step [COUGH] three!
464
00:18:57,888 --> 00:18:59,848
I'm going to take my cabbage.
465
00:18:59,848 --> 00:19:01,099
And I never use a knife.
466
00:19:01,099 --> 00:19:03,852
I always use my fingers to tear it up.
467
00:19:03,852 --> 00:19:06,980
If you get any little bits of
cabbage under your fingernails,
468
00:19:06,980 --> 00:19:09,107
oh, don't you worry.
You just pick it out
469
00:19:09,107 --> 00:19:10,734
and throw 'em in the pot.
470
00:19:10,734 --> 00:19:13,278
It all ends up in the same
place anyway. The toilet.
471
00:19:13,278 --> 00:19:15,864
[COUGHING]
472
00:19:23,288 --> 00:19:26,291
♪ Ooh, ooh, Shirley ♪
473
00:19:26,291 --> 00:19:27,751
[STUDIO AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
474
00:19:27,751 --> 00:19:29,711
SHIRLEY: I didn't plan any of this,
475
00:19:29,711 --> 00:19:32,256
but when I saw you
two were here tonight,
476
00:19:32,256 --> 00:19:34,633
I had to try to get both
of your endorsements.
477
00:19:34,633 --> 00:19:37,845
Baby girl, we love and support you.
478
00:19:37,845 --> 00:19:39,596
- We just can't endorse you.
- [AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
479
00:19:39,596 --> 00:19:41,640
JACKSON: This is also true for us.
480
00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:43,267
We think you're great,
481
00:19:43,267 --> 00:19:45,644
- it's just too much fuss.
- [LAUGHTER]
482
00:19:45,644 --> 00:19:47,437
It's 1972.
483
00:19:47,437 --> 00:19:49,606
Don't you wanna see a
Black woman as president?
484
00:19:49,606 --> 00:19:50,941
We definitely want a woman.
485
00:19:51,817 --> 00:19:54,820
Just one that can win,
like George McGovern.
486
00:19:54,820 --> 00:19:56,864
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
487
00:19:56,864 --> 00:20:00,242
And we definitely want a
Black person, can't you see?
488
00:20:00,242 --> 00:20:03,203
But just, maybe a Black man.
489
00:20:03,203 --> 00:20:05,247
Someone... like me.
490
00:20:05,247 --> 00:20:07,833
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
491
00:20:07,833 --> 00:20:09,585
Love you, fro, but we gotta go.
492
00:20:09,585 --> 00:20:11,461
GLORIA: Okay, bye!
493
00:20:11,461 --> 00:20:13,922
[AUDIENCE AWWING]
494
00:20:15,090 --> 00:20:18,594
Shirley St. Anita Hill Chisholm.
495
00:20:18,594 --> 00:20:21,013
Looks like I figured out
496
00:20:21,013 --> 00:20:23,765
the mystery of the lying wife.
497
00:20:23,765 --> 00:20:25,517
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
498
00:20:25,517 --> 00:20:28,520
Conrad! In a robe? In a hotel?
499
00:20:28,520 --> 00:20:31,106
With my best friend? How could you?
500
00:20:31,106 --> 00:20:34,568
- Oh, stop it. He knows.
- [AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
501
00:20:34,568 --> 00:20:36,737
[SIGHS] I-I'm sorry, Conrad.
502
00:20:36,737 --> 00:20:39,198
I got all caught up in the campaign,
503
00:20:39,198 --> 00:20:40,657
and then, they started burning the bras,
504
00:20:40,657 --> 00:20:42,701
and it set off the fire alarm.
505
00:20:42,701 --> 00:20:44,703
Oh, I-I pulled the fire alarm.
506
00:20:46,079 --> 00:20:48,749
Conrad was about to come out
the bathtub naked. I panicked!
507
00:20:48,749 --> 00:20:50,083
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
508
00:20:50,083 --> 00:20:51,668
That's only because I bring the heat.
509
00:20:52,628 --> 00:20:56,632
This weekend was supposed to
be all about our anniversary,
510
00:20:56,632 --> 00:21:00,594
and instead, I made it
all about me and my job.
511
00:21:00,594 --> 00:21:03,347
- [STUDIO AUDIENCE AWWING]
- It's okay, honey.
512
00:21:03,347 --> 00:21:04,765
You know what they say.
513
00:21:04,765 --> 00:21:08,227
"Politics makes for strange bedfellows."
514
00:21:08,227 --> 00:21:11,104
Speaking of, why don't we go upstairs
515
00:21:11,104 --> 00:21:15,067
- and turn up your heat?
- Ooh, there we go.
516
00:21:15,067 --> 00:21:18,946
And this is turning my
stomach. Where's that damn window?
517
00:21:18,946 --> 00:21:21,156
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
518
00:21:21,156 --> 00:21:24,701
- I love you, Conrad Chisholm.
- [STUDIO AUDIENCE AWWING]
519
00:21:24,701 --> 00:21:26,620
Excuse me? Sorry.
520
00:21:26,620 --> 00:21:29,414
I'm looking for the
Democratic National Committee?
521
00:21:29,414 --> 00:21:31,124
CONRAD: Well, you're
at the Watergate Hotel.
522
00:21:31,124 --> 00:21:33,085
You want the Watergate Office Building.
523
00:21:33,085 --> 00:21:35,295
It's down the hall, out the
exit, and across the alley.
524
00:21:36,380 --> 00:21:38,882
Thanks. Walk this way, boys.
525
00:21:38,882 --> 00:21:41,885
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
526
00:21:41,885 --> 00:21:43,720
Did they look suspicious?
527
00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:47,349
No, I'm a private investigator.
There's nothing suspicious about that.
528
00:21:47,349 --> 00:21:49,977
♪ Ooh, ooh, Shirley ♪
529
00:21:49,977 --> 00:21:51,937
[APPLAUSE, LAUGHTER]
530
00:21:53,856 --> 00:21:55,524
MEL: And now for the conclusion
531
00:21:55,524 --> 00:21:57,776
of "The Last Supper Sessions."
532
00:21:57,776 --> 00:21:59,695
[CROWD CHATTER]
533
00:21:59,695 --> 00:22:01,530
[SPEAKER CRACKLING]
534
00:22:01,530 --> 00:22:03,240
MARK: Let's see what we got here.
535
00:22:04,283 --> 00:22:05,742
So, we're on the roof then?
536
00:22:05,742 --> 00:22:08,036
[STREET CHATTER]
537
00:22:08,036 --> 00:22:10,247
[GUITAR STRUMMING]
538
00:22:10,247 --> 00:22:12,666
- WOMAN: Hi, Mary!
- [ELECTRIC PIANO PLAYING]
539
00:22:12,666 --> 00:22:14,793
♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪
540
00:22:14,793 --> 00:22:17,838
You know, the acoustics up
here are actually very lovely.
541
00:22:17,838 --> 00:22:20,883
- La, la, la, la, la.
- No, look, mate, it's "looovley."
542
00:22:20,883 --> 00:22:22,342
"Looooovley."
543
00:22:22,342 --> 00:22:24,928
Let me try that. Ooh,
ooh... Fuck yourself.
544
00:22:24,928 --> 00:22:26,430
Oh...
545
00:22:26,430 --> 00:22:27,956
JESUS: All right, lads, are we ready?
546
00:22:27,956 --> 00:22:29,016
Let's do this, baby!
547
00:22:29,016 --> 00:22:30,434
- [DRUMSTICKS CLACK]
- One, two, three, go!
548
00:22:30,434 --> 00:22:31,810
[ELECTRICITY SPARKS]
549
00:22:31,810 --> 00:22:33,687
- Oh!
- MARK: Oh no! Peter, what the shit?
550
00:22:33,687 --> 00:22:36,273
- Don't touch him!
- Oh! It's not the wiring!
551
00:22:36,273 --> 00:22:37,858
Help him out, lad, he got zapped.
552
00:22:37,858 --> 00:22:39,985
- Help him, Jesus, help him.
- And rise.
553
00:22:39,985 --> 00:22:42,696
- [GASPS] Let's do this, babies!
- Praise Jesus!
554
00:22:42,696 --> 00:22:45,574
MARK: Jesus has brought
Lazarus back from the dead!
555
00:22:45,574 --> 00:22:47,367
Lyric boy, where are you?
556
00:22:47,367 --> 00:22:49,620
LYRIC BOY: Coming, coming. MARK:
We need the lyrics to sing the song.
557
00:22:49,620 --> 00:22:52,247
- LYRIC BOY: Here you go.
- Lyric Boy, come on. Okay, ready, boys?
558
00:22:52,247 --> 00:22:53,790
[DRUMSTICKS CLACKING] One, two, three!
559
00:22:53,790 --> 00:22:56,502
[GET BACK-STYLE SONG PLAYS]
560
00:22:56,502 --> 00:23:00,714
♪ Lovely Lucy was a pharaoh's daughter ♪
561
00:23:00,714 --> 00:23:03,759
♪ Pushing camels
through a needle's eye ♪
562
00:23:03,759 --> 00:23:04,760
[CONFUSED CHATTER]
563
00:23:04,760 --> 00:23:08,972
♪ Her chance of Heaven was
slim, so she cashed it all in ♪
564
00:23:08,972 --> 00:23:10,641
♪ Now, she got taste for humble pie ♪
565
00:23:10,641 --> 00:23:12,935
I love you, Jesus!
566
00:23:12,935 --> 00:23:16,772
♪ She said give back, give back ♪
567
00:23:16,772 --> 00:23:18,148
♪ Girl, you can't take it with you ♪
568
00:23:18,148 --> 00:23:19,983
♪ Might as well give it back ♪
569
00:23:20,651 --> 00:23:21,902
♪ Give back ♪
570
00:23:21,902 --> 00:23:24,780
SOLDIER: Make way, make way.
Let's go. Clear it out. Heads up.
571
00:23:24,780 --> 00:23:26,198
♪ If you wanna get to Heaven ♪
572
00:23:26,198 --> 00:23:27,783
♪ Better give back ♪
573
00:23:27,783 --> 00:23:30,911
[DECRESCENDO, CRESCENDO]
574
00:23:30,911 --> 00:23:33,789
[CROWD CHEERING]
575
00:23:33,789 --> 00:23:35,624
It's Jesus and his apostles.
576
00:23:35,624 --> 00:23:38,293
They're ruining the bloody bazaar!
577
00:23:38,293 --> 00:23:42,256
How am I supposed to
sell me dried donkey cock?
578
00:23:42,256 --> 00:23:45,342
♪ Give back, give back,
give something back ♪
579
00:23:45,342 --> 00:23:48,804
- [EXCITED CHATTER]
- Come on, boys. Let's go deal with it.
580
00:23:48,804 --> 00:23:51,306
♪ She said give back ♪
581
00:23:51,306 --> 00:23:53,141
♪ Give back ♪
582
00:23:53,141 --> 00:23:54,810
♪ Can't just be a taker ♪
583
00:23:54,810 --> 00:23:57,187
♪ Gotta give something back now ♪
584
00:23:57,187 --> 00:23:59,565
♪ Give back, come on, give back ♪
585
00:23:59,565 --> 00:24:00,607
♪
586
00:24:00,607 --> 00:24:04,236
♪ If you wanna get to
Heaven, gotta give back... ♪
587
00:24:04,236 --> 00:24:05,953
SOLDIER: All right,
let's go. We're done here.
588
00:24:05,954 --> 00:24:07,155
That's about enough of this.
589
00:24:07,155 --> 00:24:09,908
And so, the song has come
to its natural conclusion.
590
00:24:09,908 --> 00:24:11,785
- MARK: Whoa, whoa.
- LUKE: Hey, hey, what the...
591
00:24:11,785 --> 00:24:13,120
Jesus!
592
00:24:13,120 --> 00:24:15,247
MARK: Whoa, whoa! What's all
this? Hey, what is going on?
593
00:24:15,247 --> 00:24:17,833
Huh. Judas never showed up. Weird.
594
00:24:17,833 --> 00:24:20,419
[CROWD BOOING]
595
00:24:20,419 --> 00:24:21,837
Pleasure doing business with you.
596
00:24:21,837 --> 00:24:24,882
- [COINS JINGLE]
- Feel like a bit of a traitor to be honest.
597
00:24:24,882 --> 00:24:27,176
You know who's a traitor
is fuckin' Tom Brady.
598
00:24:27,176 --> 00:24:29,636
And Johnny Damon. And Babe Ruth.
599
00:24:29,636 --> 00:24:32,264
All fuckin' traitors, all fake.
600
00:24:32,264 --> 00:24:34,016
Like this fuckin' set. Look at this!
601
00:24:34,016 --> 00:24:36,476
Supposed to be a street.
It's a fuckin' carpet!
602
00:24:36,476 --> 00:24:38,312
[NO ACCENT]: Man, I really, I
don't know how you got on set,
603
00:24:38,312 --> 00:24:40,230
but I'm just trying to...
We're just trying to do our job.
604
00:24:40,230 --> 00:24:41,523
Oh, I'm sorry. Am I ruining
605
00:24:41,523 --> 00:24:43,358
your little student film
here? Is that what's happening?
606
00:24:43,358 --> 00:24:45,527
No, this is History of the
World, Part II for Hulu.
607
00:24:45,527 --> 00:24:47,446
- Mel Brooks? You ever heard of him?
- Yeah, I heard of...
608
00:24:47,446 --> 00:24:49,615
There's no way that Mel
Brooks is a part of this.
609
00:24:49,615 --> 00:24:50,824
Where's crafty?
610
00:24:50,824 --> 00:24:53,243
- I need a fucking warmer for my Dunkin'.
- [BEEP]
611
00:24:53,243 --> 00:24:56,246
[GET BACK-STYLE RIFF]
612
00:24:56,247 --> 00:25:01,247
- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
44636
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