Original subtitles

[波蘭語] ♪在那高高的山頂上♪ On the mountain top

♪我看見黑色的影子♪ I see something black

♪那是一團牛糞♪ Is it cow shit

♪還是我的愛人？♪ Or my beloved

晚上好，女士們先生們... Good evening, ladies and gentlemen...

歡迎來到"狂野雛菊秀"——— and welcome once again to The Crazy Daisy Show.

這是個窺探現實的窗口 We have sophisticated entertainment, a window into reality...

是來自另一個世界的清新的空氣 a breath of cold air from another world.

在今天的節目裏，貞操帶基金會和 亞里斯多德利斯·阿普拉那普連鎖店... As the Chastity Belt Foundation and the Aristotlese Aplanalp chain stores...

將聯手推出1984年度 世界小姐競賽的半決賽選手 proudly present the semifinalists in the Miss World 1984 Contest!

現在，女士們先生們 我非常榮幸地... And now, ladies and gentlemen, it gives me a great deal of pleasure...

向你們隆重介紹 瑪莎·阿普拉那普女士 一位著名的慈善家 to present Mrs. Martha Aplanalp, well-known philanthropist...

兼貞操帶基金會的主席 and chairman of the Chastity Belt Foundation.

她是此次節目的最大贊助商 也是一位偉大的母親 A great sponsor and a great mother.

親愛的瑪莎女士，我的第一個問題是 "為什麼要設立貞操帶基金會？" Dear Mrs. Martha, first the question, why the Chastity Belt Foundation?

在這樣的現代化時代 這個基金會似乎有點兒老套 Surely in these modern times that seems to be a bit old-fashioned.

哦，這可沒過時... - 一點兒也沒有 Oh, we're not old-fashioned - not in the least.

在貞操帶基金會沒有金屬帶... At Chastity Belt, there are no metals...

沒有彈性支座... no elastic supports...

也沒有鎮定劑 no tranquilizers.

我們所設計出的了不起的方法能夠指引你... Through the guidance of our sensational method...

使你的身體戰勝獸性 your own body kills the animal.

我們提倡純粹的意志力的勝利 We advocate simple triumph of the will.

它毫無痛苦並且非常有益... It is painless and ever so rewarding.

再沒有狂亂的幻想 No wild dreams.

也沒有古隆的舉止 No- No peculiar behavior.

只有真正的健康和目標明確的指引 Solid health and purposeful direction.

在現今這樣病態的時代能夠聽到"真正的健康和目標明確的指引"是件好事 It's so good to hear about health and purposeful direction in these sick times.

對極了！... Right on! Sock it to me, baby.

在骨盆處一些肌肉組織構成了保護區 A network of muscles forms the protective armor around the pelvic region.

如果不能對其進行有力的控制... If not controlled and kept at bay...

狂野的衝動會將每個人都變成野獸... wild impulses will turn everyone into beastly animals...

混亂的，只知道服從天性的生物 chaotic natural beings.

來自77個國家的半決賽選手們 將角逐今天晚上的比賽 Semifinalists from 77 countries have been selected and sent here this evening.

她們是最令人滿意的，最優秀的... They are, of course, the most desirable, prominent...

保存完好的處女 and well-preserved virgins available.

今年幸運的冠軍將會得到五百億美元的獎金 This year's stake for the lucky young winner is $50 billion.

五百億美元———這是對阿普拉那普先生財富的估價 Fifty billion dollars, the estimated fortune of Mr. Aplanalp...

他是瑪莎·阿普拉那普女士的兒子也是她的驕傲，她的快樂之源 uh, Mrs. Martha Aplanalp's boy, her pride and joy.

世界上最富有的單身漢 The richest bachelor in the world...

他突然決定要在這個夏天獻出自己的獨身生活 who decided suddenly this summer to give up his bachelorhood...

來贊助世界小姐競賽並與冠軍 to sponsor the Miss World Contest and marry the winner...

地球上最值得珍借的女孩...結婚 the most cherished girl on the planet Earth.

阿普拉那普家族有一句俗話 There's a saying in the Aplanalp family:

"我們買東西的時候必定要買最好的要買最新的" ''When we buy something, we buy the best, and we buy it brand-new.''

現在，女士們先生們讓我們歡迎米特芬格醫生 And now, ladies and gentlemen, Dr. Mittlefinger.

過來，醫生 Turn over here, Doctor.

是的 米特芬格醫生是個不同尋常的人 Yes, uh, Dr. Mittlefinger certainly is an extraordinary man.

他接生過三位將軍 Um, has to his credit the delivery of three army generals...

四位國會議員 愛斯基摩族的六胞胎，呃... four members of Parliament, Eskimo sextuplets, uh...

還有許許多多人...和女人 and, of course, many, many more people... and women.

我，呃...我能夠起到如此重要的作用 讓我非常興奮 I, uh - I'm really thrilled to be able to perform at this important function...

呃...希望我的試驗樣品都能讓人感覺愉快 and, uh, I'm anticipating some delightful specimens.

每一朵新鮮的花兒都能帶來全新的喜悅，和全新的激情 Each new flower brings a new joy, a new excitement.

節目可以開始了嗎？ Can we start the show?

當然 好的，讓我們請出第一位參賽者... Of course. Uh, so let's meet now the first contestant...

南羅得西亞小姐 Miss Southern Rhodesia.

又一個歷史性的一刻一扇通往現實的窗戶 Another historical moment, a window into reality...

一個從來沒有在電視上直播的事件 an event never attempted live on television before...

將在"狂野雛菊秀"中為您展現 and coming to you on The Crazy Daisy Show.

請站上來 If you'll just step up here.

能把你的小內褲脫了嗎？ Would you be good enough to remove your pants?

噢，我很樂意 Oh, my pleasure.

- 米特芬格醫生 - 真好 - Dr. Mittlefinger- - So kind.

具有非常深邃的洞察力 brilliant master of deep insights and even deeper insights.

能夠探知人類身體及靈魂最深處的秘密 Innovative explorer of the abysses of the human body and soul.

告訴我們，小姐，呃，南羅得西亞小姐 你現在感覺如何？ Tell us, Miss, uh, Southern Rhodesia. Tell us, how do you feel now?

噢，好極了，噢！ Oh, I'm great. Oh!

怎麼了？ What's happening?

你在撓我癢癢 You're tickling me.

我非常敏感 你那盞小燈撓得我癢癢 I'm really sensitive. You're tickling me with your little light.

這盞小燈 This little light.

現在，女士們先生們我們隆重介紹剛果小姐 Now, ladies and gentlemen, we proudly present Miss Congo.

親愛的，請把你的內褲脫了 Remove your panties please, honey.

嗨，寶貝，你是說我的香蕉嗎？ Hey, baby. You mean my bananas?

哦，是的，當然 看上去很好吃 Oh, yes, of course. Delicious.

處女膜有好幾種 它是一小塊脆弱的皮膚... There are different types of hymen, a delicate little piece of skin...

是一個女孩踏入成人歡愉世界的第一步 that informs us about a girl's initiation into the world of adult pleasures.

我是指那罪惡的，令人噁心的肉體上的歡愉... I mean the sinful, disgusting pleasures of the flesh...

和不尋常的感官上的... and unusual sensual...

興奮 excitation.

現在出場的是南斯拉夫小姐活力四射的健康的象徵 Now, here comes Miss Yugoslavia, a picture of radiant health.

是的，這位年輕的小姐非常自信 Yes, well, this young lady is certainly self-assured.

現在，我們繼續 Now, moving right along, folks...

讓我們請出加拿大小姐 let's meet Mademoiselle Canada.

能請你把內褲脫下來嗎？ Would you take your pants off, please?

我不穿內褲 I don't wear any.

你從不穿內褲嗎？ You never wear any pants?

在這樣一個特殊的場合當然不會穿 Not for a special occasion like this.

很好，很好 Splendid. Splendid.

是目前為止這裏最美妙的東西 By far the most beautiful thing here.

在我的事業生涯中從沒見過如此甜美的東西 In all my years of practice, I've never seen anything so sweet.

一朵美麗的花蕾 A rosebud.

[意大利語] ♪整個世界都是我們的國家♪ The whole world is our country

♪自由是我們的法則♪ Liberty is our law

♪只有一個想法♪ And just one thought...

♪整個世界都是我們的國家♪ The whole world is our country

♪自由是我們的法則♪ Liberty is our law

♪只有一個想法 在我們心中燃燒♪ Just one thought burns in our hearts

♪大地上的流浪者♪ Wanderers on land

♪海洋上的流浪者♪ And sea

♪為了一個念頭♪ For an idea

♪我們將摯愛拋在身後♪ We leave our loved ones behind

♪整個世界都是我們的國家♪ The whole world is our country

♪自由是我們的法則♪ Liberty is our law

♪只有一個想法♪ And just one thought...

♪整個世界都是我們的國家♪ The whole world is our country

♪自由是我們的法則♪ Liberty is our law

♪只有一個想法 在我們心中燃燒♪ Just one thought burns in our hearts

♪但所有流浪的人們啊♪ But all your exiled people

♪會回到你的身邊♪ Shall return to you

♪揮舞著火炬♪ And brandish the torch

♪要求他們的權利♪ To demand their rights

♪整個世界都是我們的國家♪ The whole world is our country

♪自由是我們的法則♪ Liberty is our law

♪只有一個想法♪ And just one thought...

♪整個世界都是我們的國家♪ The whole world is our country

♪自由是我們的法則♪ Liberty is our law

♪只有一個想法在我們心中燃燒♪ Just one thought burns in our hearts

我買東西的時候總是買最好的 When I buy something, I always buy the best.

知道嗎，就在昨天我買了南非一座鑽石礦 You know, yesterday, I bought a diamond mine in South Africa.

今天，要買另一座 Today, another buy.

最養尊處優的新娘 The best-bred bride available.

最養尊處優的新娘 The best-bred bride available.

[百年好合]

上面肯定有大概785顆鑽石，你知道嗎？ Must be about 7 85 diamonds in there. You know that?

- 這個嗎？ - 是的，也許還多些 - About that? - Oh, yeah. Maybe more.

這些都來自我的鑽石礦 And they all came from my diamond mine.

是的！ Yeah!

是的，先生，寶貝 就這樣 Yes, sir, baby. Here we go.

♪[威廉泰爾序曲] [Vocalizing: William Tell Overture]

是的，手工雕刻的 Yeah. Hand-carved.

- 知道這是誰嗎？ - 不知道 - You know who this fella is? - No.

這是卡爾 卡爾馬克思！ That's Karl. Karl Marx!

是的 Yeah.

他就是那個槍殺俄國沙皇的人 是的，槍子兒正中腦袋，一槍斃命 He's the guy that shot the Russian czar. Yeah. Shot him dead, right in the head. Yeah.

這引發了第一次世界大戰，甜心 是的！ That started World War I, honey. Yeah!

我是從一位與我有生意來往的俄國人那裏得到的 I got it from a Russian business connection. Yeah.

他買了許多我的鑽石 He buys a lot of my diamonds.

- 看到下面的瀑布了嗎？ - [加拿大小姐]是的 - You see that little fountain down there? - Yes.

那是我下一個購買目標，是的 That's my next buy. Yeah!

那將是我在造園術方面一筆最大的投資 It's gonna be my biggest undertaking in landscape architecture.

我要從加拿大政府那裏將它購買過來 I'm gonna buy it from the Canadian government.

我要將它改頭換面一番 I'm gonna renovate it, redecorate it.

把水抽幹，不再有瀑布 Get rid of the water, turn off the falls.

我要安裝一個電子合成的 I'm gonna install an electronic, synthetic...

色彩豐富的移動的激光影像 laser moving image in livin' color.

各種各樣的顏色，甜心！是的 In livin' color, honey! Yeah.

我們還要安裝一個四聲道的音響系統 And we're gonna have a huge quadraphonic sound system.

是的！來改變這原本屬於皇室的瀑布 Yeah! Of the royal waters. Yeah!

我們將用上最好的視覺和音響系統 We're gonna have the best sight and sound system available. Yeah.

它們將不受氣候影響 Unaffected by weather conditions.

這是我的帝國 My empire.

為整個國家提供牛奶 Milk for the entire country.

讓我們看看新娘 Let's see the bride.

- 哦呵 - 嗨 - Whoo! - Hey!

媽媽！ Mama!

哦呵！ Whoo!

現在你們也許會問我真的有時間去結婚嗎？ Now, you may ask, do I have time for marriage?

現在我可以說結婚是節省金錢與時間的最好良方 And I simply state that marriage is a great gimmick for saving money and time...

時間就是金錢哪！ which is money!

我已經理解了婚姻的真正含義 I have come to understand the real meaning of marriage.

我不能再浪費了 I simply can't afford any more waste.

我不能再承受我混亂的性生活了 I can't afford any more chaos in my sex life.

是的，每個人都有必要放鬆自己但為什麼要浪費呢？ All right. Everyone has to relieve himself, but why waste it?

比如說你和一個女人上了床在那麼一兩秒鐘裏感到非常快樂 Okay. You bang some broad, you feel good for a half a second...

隨後你就意識到得趕緊給醫生打個電話 but then you realize you've gotta run to the phone to call your doctor...

去做性病檢查 'cause you gotta have a V.D. test.

你撫慰了你的肉慾 You soothe your balls...

卻將為此頭疼不已 and you get a headache.

- 沒錯，兒子 - 呃，我不會再那樣兒了 - That's right, my son. - Well, not for me no more.

我保證 I guarantee that.

我媽媽總是跟我說： "兒子，注意你的健康" My mama kept telling me, ''Son, look after your health.''

現在，媽媽，我保證會注意的 Well, Ma, I sure as hell aim to.

過來，親愛的城裏最迷人的小母牛也是世界上最迷人的 Come over here, honey. Best little heifer in town. In the world!

沒有任何化學替代品 No chemical substitutes.

所有的成分都經過了檢驗再檢驗 All ingredients checked and double-checked...

全都純淨無比 and certified pure.

現在要找到這樣的東西可不容易，不是嗎？ Not an easy thing to find these days, is it?

呃，可我找到了 Well, I done it.

現在我得到了一位純潔的家庭主婦 So now I have acquired a lady of the house...

一個值得珍藏的珠寶 a personal jewel...

然而最重要的是 but above all...

這是一套對未知廢品的淨化設備 a purified sanitation system for unchecked waste.

嗨！嗨！ Hey! Hey!

嗨，哦嗨！ Hey, Mama! Yahoo!

嗨，哦嗨！ Hey, Mama! Yahoo!

[英語] ♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

♪活著是快樂的♪ It's a joy to be alive

♪快樂是幸福的♪ It's good to be glad

♪生存也是幸福的♪ Good to survive

♪瘋狂多麼偉大♪ It's great to be mad

♪一無所有也相當有趣♪ It's fun to have nothing

♪讓大家看著我們的所作所為♪ Do things in the nude

♪噢，飢餓的感覺真是美妙♪ Oh, it's sweet to be hungry

♪美味無比♪ It's finger-licking good

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

♪瘋狂是快樂的♪ It's a joy to be crazy

♪悲傷是幸福的♪ It's good to be sad

♪無所事事是快樂的♪ It's good to be lazy

♪邪惡也是幸福的♪ Great to be bad

♪幸運是快樂的♪ It's good to be lucky

♪犯罪是幸福的♪ Good to practice deadly sin

♪為某個原因而逝去也是快樂的♪ To die for a cause

♪活著吧品嚐勝利吧 To be alive and to win

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

嗨，波坦金！ Hey, Potemkin!

你是不是參加了那場著名的失敗了的革命？ Aren't you from that famous revolution that failed?

我是說1905年發生的那次革命 I mean the one in 1 905.

[法語] 船長我是你的新歡 Captain, I am your new lover.

[荷蘭語] 真是喜從天降！ The annunciation!

[法語] 我為愛飢渴 I'm starving for love.

我渴望愛 I'm hungry for love.

[荷蘭語] 那些飢渴的人知道如何做愛 Those who starve know how to make love.

他們的電量儲蓄已久 They're charged with electricity.

[法語] 這條船是去哪兒的？ Where is this boat going?

[波蘭語] 任何一個地方 All the way.

[法語] 任何一個地方？ All the way?

[波蘭語] 直到世界盡頭 To the bottom.

[法語] 你得為這條船找個好水手 來吧，我會好好對你的 You need a good sailor on this boat. Come. I'll treat you well.

[波蘭語] 真高興能遇上 What a joy to meet...

一位可靠的... an authentic...

性感的...無產者！ sexual proletarian!

野獸！ Beast!

太美妙了！ Fascination!

[波蘭語] 奮力前進吧！ Forward!

真是美麗的災難！ Optimistic tragedy!

噢，我的水手！ Oh, sailor!

[克羅地亞語) 把你的劍狠狠地刺進去吧！不會傷害到她的！ Stick your sword in! You won't hurt her!

[波蘭語] "男人"———這個詞聽起來真是太有力了！ ''Man'' - how proud that word sounds!

[意大利語] ♪前進吧，人們，去戰鬥♪ Forward, people, to battle

♪紅色的旗幟，紅色的旗幟♪ The red flag, the red flag

♪前進吧，人們，去戰鬥♪ Forward, people, to battle

♪紅色的旗幟將獲得勝利♪ The red flag will triumph

♪紅色的旗幟將獲得勝利♪ The red flag will triumph

♪紅色的旗幟將獲得勝利♪ The red flag will triumph

♪紅色的旗幟將獲得勝利♪ The red flag will triumph

♪共產主義萬歲 自由萬歲♪ Long live communism and freedom

♪前進吧，人們，去戰鬥♪ Forward, people, to battle

♪紅色的旗幟，紅色的旗幟♪ The red flag, the red flag

♪前進吧，人們，去戰鬥♪ Forward, people, to battle

♪紅色的旗幟將獲得勝利♪ The red flag will triumph

♪前進吧，人們，去戰鬥♪ Forward, people, to battle

♪紅色的旗幟，紅色的旗幟♪ The red flag, the red flag

♪前進吧，人們，去戰鬥♪ Forward, people, to battle

♪紅色的旗幟將獲得勝利♪ The red flag will triumph

♪紅色的旗幟將獲得勝利♪ The red flag will triumph

♪紅色的旗幟將獲得勝利♪ The red flag will triumph

這和我原本期望的一點兒也不一樣 I expected something else to happen.

別胡說，他任何事都做得到 他是世界上最有勢力的百萬富翁 Nonsense. He can do anything. He's the most powerful millionaire in the world.

也就是說，很簡單，為了你自己好，你得忘掉這段婚姻 Which means, quite simply, that for your own good, you better forget this marriage.

那麼我可以得到贍養費 Then I think I should get alimony.

我強烈地建議你... I advise you strongly...

別想這麼多 to refrain from thinking anything.

思考有時候是件危險的事 Thinking sometimes can be a very dangerous exercise.

非常危險 Very dangerous indeed.

唔，這太瘋狂了 Hmm. This is insane.

是的 Yes.

也許我們該去做個精神病檢查 Maybe we should ask for a psychiatric examination.

許多人有類似的癥狀 他們的精神狀況變得混亂不堪 There are people with similar symptoms. They become confused.

只好在精神病院渡過餘生 They spend the rest of their lives behind the walls of asylums.

- 這幢房子是我的！ - 你休想！ - This house is mine! - Forget it!

- 贍養費！ - 哦，是嗎？ - Alimony! - Oh, yeah?

永遠都別想！ Never!

理智點吧！ Be reasonable!

傑瑞米，傑瑞米 Jeremiah. Jeremiah.

你來照應一下，傑瑞米 Take care of her, Jeremiah.

這是我的！ 這是我的！ This is mine! This is mine!

這是我的！我的！ This is mine! Mine!

你處理吧，傑瑞米 Take care of her, Jeremiah.

她太累了 She's overtired.

感覺有點不舒服 She doesn't feel very well.

可憐的女孩 Poor girl.

[質量保證純淨牛奶有限公司]

我在哪兒？噢！ Where am I? Oh!

希特勒！骯髒的猶太人 Hitler I Dirty Jew.

他們叫我穴居人 They call me Neanderthal.

法西斯豬！ Fascist pigI

我可不是普通人 I'm not just anybody.

骯髒的共產主義者 Dirty Commie.

他們甚至想把我放到 Why, they even wanted to put me on exhibit...

自然科學博物館裏展覽 in the Museum of Natural Sciences.

我的模型被用於贊迪的試驗中 My portrait is used in Szondy's test. [贊迪：句牙利著名醫學家]

我的名字曾出現在 卡夫·艾賓的著作裏 I am listed in Krafft-Ebing. [卡夫·艾賓：德國精神病學家]

我是一個得到認證的精神病患者 I am a certified psychopath.

甚至龍勃羅梭也引用我為例證 I am even quoted by Lombroso. And... [龍勃羅梭：意大利犯罪學家，精神病學家，刑事人類學派的創始人]

而且我那玩意兒可是巨無霸 my size is superhuman.

- 害怕了？ - 才沒有 - Afraid? - No.

唔... Hmm.

我為自己編了一句廣告語： I have my own advertising slogan:

歡迎品嚐，美味無比 Try me. I'm delicious.

看到這如巧克力般的膚色嗎？ See this chocolate complexion?

嘗嘗吧 Try it.

是很甜 It's sweet.

美味得讓你放不下手 Finger-licking good.

噢 Ooh.

我是天主教徒這對我具有某種精神意義 I'm Catholic, and it's a spiritual thing for me.

我是穆斯林我這東西可是真實存在的 I'm Muslim, and I have a real thing for you.

噢，你這個混蛋！ Oh,you damned fool!

這是我唯一的財產是我的鑽石礦 This is my only property. This is my diamond mine.

我要用我父親教給我的東西對付你 I'll do something to you that my father taught me.

爽了？ Are you happy?

- 嗨，先生，今天去哪兒？ - 噢，巴黎 - Hello, sir. Where are you off to today? - Oh. Paris.

可以看看你的票嗎？ 謝謝 May I have your ticket, please? Thank you.

這有一噸重呢裏面裝的是什麼？ It weighs a ton. What have you got in there?

噢，書，很多書 Oh, books. Lots of them.

書的確很重 我選修了哲學課 Books weigh a lot. I'm taking a refresher course in philosophy.

馬爾庫塞，蘇佩克，弗蘭尼茨基，薩特 Marcuse, Supek, Vranicki, Sartre. [註：上述均為著名哲學家]

- 你知道，這些書都很重 - 超重了55磅 - You know, i-i-it's heavy. - That would be 5 5 pounds overweight.

超重的部分我會付錢的 Oh, I'll pay the difference.

非常感謝 Thank you very much.

謝謝 Thank you.

[法語] 我有禮物給你 I have presents for you.

一塊真正的阿拉伯地毯 A real Arabian carpet.

喜歡嗎？ You like it?

中國製造的 Made in China.

還有加利福尼亞州伯克利出產的伏特加酒 Vodka from Berkeley, California.

給你的 For you.

還有我的朋友 And my friend...

利奧尼 Leonide.

我的名字叫盧夫巴庫寧 And my name is Luv Bakunin.

喜歡我的朋友嗎？ Do you like my friend?

噢 Oh.

[法語] 別把你的命運繫在任何一個人身上 Entrust your fate to no one!

那些人！ People!

警察的鐵靴將踏碎你的慾望和情感 The policeman's boot crushes your desires and feelings.

讓我們現實一點要求一些不可能得到的東西吧 Let's be realistic and demand the impossible.

比如說舒舒服服洗個澡 A good bath, for instance.

我四個月沒洗過澡了 I haven't had one in four months.

[法語] ♪讓我們現實一點同志們♪ Let's be realistic, comrades

♪提一些不可能被滿足的要求♪ And demand the impossible

♪比如說舒舒服服洗個澡♪ A hot bath, for instance

[法語] 別呆在這兒 Don't stay here.

這條船上都是軍人 This boat is full of corpses.

沒關係 It doesn't matter.

整個世界都擠滿了軍人 The whole world is full of corpses.

[卡廷森林] IN THE KATYN FOREST (註：蘇軍在此屠殺了約1.5萬名波蘭軍人)[卡廷慘案]

[法語] ♪讓我們現實一點同志們♪ Let's be realistic, comrades

♪提一些不可能被滿足的要求♪ And demand the impossible

[英語] ♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

♪活著是快樂的♪ It's a joy to be alive

♪快樂是幸福的♪ It's good to be glad

♪生存也是幸福的♪ Good to survive

♪瘋狂多麼偉大♪ It's great to be mad

♪一無所有也相當有趣♪ It's fun to have nothing

♪讓大家看著我們的所作所為♪ Do things in the nude

♪噢，飢餓的感覺真是美妙♪ Oh, it's sweet to be hungry

♪美味無比♪ It's finger-licking good

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

♪地球上是否有生命♪ Is there life on the Earth

♪出生後是否能生存♪ Is there life after birth

畫像，畫像 誰照看一下畫像？ The portrait. The portrait. Somebody.

畫像，把畫像放好 The portrait. Get the portrait in place.

[英語] 請看著相機露出兇惡的墨西哥表情 I want you to face the camera and look terribly Mexican...

我讓你飛到這兒來可不是為了看到一個法國臨時演員... 'cause I didn't fly you all over here to look like a French extra.

然後大聲唱起來 And start to sing very nobly.

[西班牙語] ♪看看這充滿暴力的世界♪ To see this world of violence

♪如此多的痛苦讓我興奮難耐♪ And so much suffering makes me high

♪如此努力地生活會讓我死去♪ To live more fully I will die

♪我熱切地渴望寬恕♪ Such passion cries out for forgiveness

♪血流成河，屠殺♪ River of blood, carnage

♪我要吶喊♪ I will shout

♪"我想得到更多！"♪ ''I want more!''

♪陽光燦爛的黑夜 噢 我的心 在慶祝激情噴發的時刻♪ Night of the sun, oh my heart, to celebrate the explosion

♪歷史的車輪帶著我前行♪ With the motor of history driving me on

♪我是一頭狂野的牡馬♪ I'm a wild stallion

♪金黃的鬃毛在風中飄揚♪ My golden mane flies in the wind

♪我四處尋找快樂時光♪ As I seek out good times

♪我勇敢的寶劍堅挺無比♪ My valiant sword stands ever ready

停！停！你怎麼了？ Cut! Cut! What's the matter, love, now?

你怎麼回事？ 不知道我們的預算有限嗎？ What's got into you? Don't you know we're working on a limited budget here?

不知道我明晚就得趕回倫敦嗎？ Don't you know I've got to be back in London by tomorrow night?

再來一次 這一次一定要正確無誤！ Let's do it again, and this time, let's get it bloody right!

回放，回放 Rewind. Rewind.

- 那麼，你準備好了嗎？ - 好了 - So, are you ready? - Ready.

[西班牙語] ♪看看這充滿暴力的世界♪ To see this world of violence

♪如此多的痛苦讓我興奮難耐♪ And so much suffering makes me high

♪如此努力地生活會讓我死去♪ To live more fully I will die

♪我熱切地渴望寬恕♪ Such passion cries out for forgiveness

♪血流成河，屠殺♪ River of blood, carnage

♪我要吶喊♪ I will shout

♪"我想得到更多！"♪ ''I want more!''

♪陽光燦爛的黑夜 噢 我的心 在慶祝激情噴發的時刻♪ Night of the sun, oh my heart, to celebrate the explosion

♪歷史的車輪帶著我前行♪ With the motor of history driving me on

♪我是一頭狂野的牡馬♪ I'm a wild stallion

♪金黃的鬃毛在風中飄揚♪ My golden mane flies in the wind

♪我四處尋找快樂時光♪ As I seek out good times

♪我勇敢的寶劍堅挺無比♪ My valiant sword stands ever ready

♪這頭狂野的牡馬決不會被馴服♪ This wild stallion cannot be tamed

♪在我所到之處燃起熱情的火焰♪ Stirring up passion wherever I go

♪這是我的讚歌♪ This is my song

♪在我的墳前 將出現成千上萬匹戰馬♪ A thousand steeds will rise from my grave

♪無法馴服，毫不畏懼♪ Untamed and unafraid

[英語] 你真美 You are so beautiful.

[英語] 我知道 I know.

你的眼睛讓人無法杭拒 Your eyes are irresistible.

今晚我必須見到你 I must see you tonight.

現在就可以見到我 See me now.

唔... Mmm.

[意大利語] 我們來拍張聖心大教堂的照片！ Let's get a picture of Sacre Coeur!

就站在那兒！ Stand right there!

是他！大師我們來拍張照 It's him! Master, we must have a picture.

噢！ Oh!

噢 - Oh.

喔 Ow.

[英語]終於看到了！ At last! At last!

直播電影！ Instant cinema!

[英語] 你叫了醫生嗎？ Have you sent for the doctor?

[法語] 我的小牛排呢？ Where's my veal chop?

[英語] 你好，大師 Hello, maestro.

我知道你是個好情人 可這一幕真是讓我震驚啊 I knew you were a hell of a lover, but this really knocks me out.

我可不是個容易嚇一跳的人 And I am not easily surprised.

[英語] 我也吃了一大驚，先生 Knocks me out too, senor.

[法語] 這可真是愛的牽絆... It's a real love cramp.

男人的那玩意兒勃起之後 The man's organ is erect.

被女人的性器緊緊裹住 The woman's love muscle closes tightly around it.

有時候這讓人舒服無比 但有時候... Sometimes it tickles, but sometimes

它們會粘在一起 they get stuck.

狗兒也會那樣 Happens to dogs too.

[西班牙語]

- [英語] 你要把它割掉嗎？ - 別擔心，沒什麼好害怕的 - You're gonna cut it off? - Don't worry. Have no fear.

- 拉丁愛人 - 是啊 - Latin lover. - Si.

[法語] 12號桌上點心了 Hors d'oeuvres for table 1 2.

啊！ Ah!

歡呼吧！ Arriba!

- [英語] 能給我簽個名嗎？ - 當然，當然 - Can I have an autograph, please? - Si. Si.

- [法語] - 大師，可以為我們唱一曲嗎？ Will you sing something for us, maestro, please?

[西班牙語] ♪歷史的車輪帶著我前行♪ With the motor ofhistory driving me on

♪我是一頭狂野的牡馬♪ I'm a wild stallion

♪金黃的鬃毛在風中飄揚♪ My golden mane flies in the wind

♪我四處尋找快樂時光♪ As I seek out good times

♪我勇敢的寶劍堅挺無比♪ My valiant sword stands ever ready

♪這頭狂野的牡馬決不會被馴服♪ This wild stallion cannot be tamed

♪在我所到之處燃起熱情的火焰♪ Stirring up passion wherever I go

♪這是我的讚歌♪ This is my song

♪在我的墳前 將出現成千上萬匹戰馬♪ A thousand steeds will rise from my grave

♪無法馴服，毫不畏懼♪ Untamed and unafraid

[法語]

[波蘭語] 我去西班牙的時候... When I left for Spain...

還是戰爭時期 in the war

那是一場反對戰爭 反對法西斯的戰爭 against all war and against fascism...

那時我的醫生告訴我... my doctor said to me,

"同志... ''Comrade...

別去！ don't go!

你太虛弱 You're too weak.

太脆弱了" You're so delicate.''

他說，"生命是如此脆弱 He said, ''Life is so fragile.

必須得到保護使其不受傷害" It must be protected.''

"不受什麼傷害？" 我問 ''From what?'' I asked.

"水嗎？火嗎？ ''From water? Fire?

還是風？ Wind?

或者是人？ Men?

"帶著你一文不值的建議滾吧" 我跟他說 You can wipe your ass with your advice,'' I told him.

我跟我的丈夫說 I told my husband...

"自由和共產主義今天即將開始" ''Freedom and communism start today.''

"愛情始於今日"... ''Love starts today''...

我這樣告訴我的情人 I told my lover.

"我們不能靠謊言發動革命"... ''We can't wage revolution with lies,''

我這樣告訴黨書記 I told the secretary of my party cell.

我告訴我的士兵們 I told my soldiers,

"我們打仗的目的不是為榮譽而死... ''Our aim in this war isn't to die on the field of honor.

赴死的人是真正的傻瓜 Whoever falls and dies is a real schmuck,

徹底的笨蛋！" a total idiot!''

大家都遺棄了我 Everyone has deserted me.

只有一些老兵們時不時地會來看看我 Only a few old soldiers come visit me now and then.

別呆在這兒 Don't stay here.

喔 Wow.

[英語] 我的名字叫安娜普蘭妮塔 My name is Anna Planeta.

♪[外語]

♪[外語]

♪[外語]

♪[外語]

[英語] 要是你足夠幸運就能和我上床了，甜心先生 You can fuck me if you are lucky, Mr. Sugar.

[英語] ♪三隻瞎眼的老鼠♪ Three blind mice

♪三隻瞎眼的老鼠♪ Three blind mice

♪看它們如何奔跑♪ See how they run

♪看它們如何奔跑♪ See how they run

♪它們跟在農夫妻子的後面 就是她用刀子割斷了它們的尾巴♪ They all ran after the farmer's wife, who cut off their tails with a carving knife

♪在你的生命中是否見過三隻瞎眼的老鼠♪ Did you ever see such a thing in your life as three blind mice

♪三隻瞎眼的老鼠♪ Three blind mice

♪看它們如何奔跑看它們如何奔跑♪ See how they run, See how they run

- ♪它們跟在農夫妻子的後面♪ They all ran after the farmer's wife

♪[波蘭語]

[外語]

[外語]

[外語]

[英語] 我正搭建聖靈感孕的... I'm building the head...

重要部分 of Immaculate Conception.

用你的腦子... Conceive your child in the brains...

受孕吧... of a -

[法語]

[西班牙語] 放好放平 這樣我就可以切成小塊兒了 Nice and flat so I can cut little slices.

可以切了嗎？ Can I cut it now?

沒人回答 我可以切了嗎？ No one's answering. Shall I cut it?

噢！ Oh!

真好吃！ 誰要來一塊？ Delicious! Who wants a slice?

啊！ Aaah!

[波蘭語] ♪那是一團牛糞♪ Is it cow shit

♪還是我的愛人♪ Or my beloved

- ["快樂頌"] - [外語]

♪[德語"快樂頌"]

[第二部分 體操 為了健康 衛生學 體育]

[嬰兒體操由柏林諾曼 神經研究中心發明並演示]

♪[德語"快樂頌"]

♪[德語]

[外語]

[外語]

- [外語]

噢！噢！ Oh! Oh!

[外語]

[外語]

♪[華爾茲舞曲]

[波蘭語] 我所愛的每個人都死了 Everyone I loved is dead.

[法語] 我感覺很好 I feel good.

[波蘭語] 總是這樣開始 It always starts out that way.

開始總是那麼美好 It always starts out so well.

[法語] 糖，到處都是糖 Sugar everywhere.

真不敢相信 I don't believe it.

[法語] 這條船上到處都是糖 This boat is full of sugar.

糖很危險 Sugar is dangerous.

[法語] 今天天氣不錯 Fine weather today.

[波蘭語] 你怎麼能這麼說？ How can you say that?

[法語] 糖很危險 Sugar is dangerous.

[法語] 讓你活在危險當中 Makes you live dangerously.

你害怕過去嗎？ Are you afraid of the past?

[波蘭語] 這裏的糖都是我買的 I brought all this sugar here,

但苦澀的味道依然滯留不去 but the bitter taste still lingers.

[法語] 在任何情況下過去的痕跡都無從抹煞 In any case, the traces can't be erased.

[波蘭語] 證人呢？ What about the witnesses?

證人必須消失 The witnesses must disappear.

噢 Oh.

[法語] 真好 That's good.

繼續 Go on.

[波蘭語] 沒有任何解釋嗎？ No explanation?

[法語] 並不是每件事情都有解釋的 Not everything can be explained.

[法語] 當瓦庫林哈克被殺害的時候 我都要嫉妒得發狂了 I was so jealous when Vakulinchuk was killed.

[法語] 當瓦庫林哈克被殺害的時候 我都要嫉妒得發狂了 I was so jealous when Vakulinchuk was killed.

["國際歌"]

["國際歌"]

[波蘭語] 上帝啊你是如此悲傷 My God, how sad you are!

準備好眼淚了嗎？ Is the tear ready?

[法語]

安娜！ Anna!

[英語] 親愛的，這將是你職業生涯的高峰 Darling, this is going to be the highlight of your career.

從現在開始當人們吃巧克力的時候... From now on, when people eat chocolate-

我是指我們為其拍廣告的這個牌子的巧克力... I mean the brand we advertise-

他們的感覺會完全不同 they will not feel the same.

我要讓他們感覺他們吃的...是你 I want them to feel as they're eating you.

開拍 Action.

巧克力 Chocolat.

[法語] 放鬆點，放鬆點 Easy, easy.

很好 Perfect.

很好 太美了 Perfect. Very beautiful.

- [英語] 好的 - [法語] 非常好 - Okay. - Sensational!

[英語] 好了 Okay.

[英語] 唔..太棒了 Mmm. Right.

我們會賣出很多巧克力 We're gonna sell the chocolate.

美極了 Beautiful.

美極了 Beautiful.

[英語] 讓一切都為人所知... Let everything be known...

讓一切都純淨無比 and let everything be clean.

[英語] 我們在世界各地的探訪人員遇到了一些問題 Our scouts had trouble in certain parts of the world.

現在要找到一位美麗的處女可不容易 It's not easy to find a girl who's both pretty and a virgin.

我要跟你說我們的男孩們可費了不少力氣 Our boys did quite a job, I'll tell you.

♪[希臘語] ( Maria Katira - The Urchins Down In The Meadow )

♪[希臘語]