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(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
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(SNICKERING)
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BRICK:Once upon a time, there was a TV show about
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00:00:26,294 --> 00:00:28,834
a group of brave, happy, well-adjusted sportsmen
5
00:00:28,897 --> 00:00:31,897
who competed in wholesome racing events well-suited for family viewing.
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00:00:31,966 --> 00:00:33,226
But that one got canceled.
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-(EXPLOSIONS)
-So we made this one,
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and gave it the same name
to fool the sponsors.
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-(ENGINES REVVING)
-(BRICK YELPS)
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BRICK:And there the Wacky Racers go.
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Zooming across the bonny hills of Scotland,
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00:00:42,944 --> 00:00:47,084
in a difficult display of professionalism and good sportsmanship.
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-(SHEEP BLEATING)
-Out of my way, you graying gadflies!
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(SIGHS) Another day,
another race.
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00:00:52,653 --> 00:00:54,293
Maybe we should try
something new?
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00:00:54,355 --> 00:00:56,755
Oh, I don't know.
Some things are perfect the way they are.
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00:00:56,824 --> 00:00:59,494
I just wish that something new
would happen.
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00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:02,060
(YAWNS) Muttley,
fire my brand-new
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reality-mangling meta missile.
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-(GRUNTS)
-(BEEPS)
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Now, that's new.
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00:01:12,340 --> 00:01:14,580
I think you kind of overdid it
this time, Dicky.
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00:01:14,641 --> 00:01:16,311
-Meh.
-PENELOPE: It's sucking us in!
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00:01:16,377 --> 00:01:18,577
BELLA: And believe me,
I know sucking.
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ALL: Whoa!
26
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What's happening?
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Your new meta missile
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opened a portal
to a different dimension.
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Dastardly, where did you get
those things?
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From Apocalypse Al's
All Discount, Third-Hand Doomsday Emporium
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and Exotic Cheese Bar.
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One more purchase,
and I get 10% off
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a nuclear-powered
Planet Destructo-matic.
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It's a Christmas gift
from me to me.
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(ALL SCREAMING)
36
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-Where's our cars?
-Uh-oh.
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00:01:45,372 --> 00:01:46,742
PETER: Oh, there they are.
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(ALL GROANING)
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Where are we?
40
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PENELOPE: What
an ordinary-looking place.
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(SIGHS) The locations just
haven't been the same since the art director quit.
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DASTARDLY: Never mind
the scenery, Pitstop.
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(WHIMPERS) Look, I've got
a boo-boo on my pinky!
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00:02:02,290 --> 00:02:04,090
-Oh, the pain, the pain!
-I.Q.: Whoa!
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You look fine to me,
Dastardly.
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Nonsense! I can feel
my life ebbing away
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as we speak.
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00:02:09,863 --> 00:02:11,273
Someone call a doctor!
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00:02:11,332 --> 00:02:13,302
(CLEARS THROAT)
Did someone call for a doctor?
50
00:02:13,367 --> 00:02:14,997
-Thank you, Mr. Doctor.
-(I.Q. GRUNTS)
51
00:02:15,069 --> 00:02:18,339
Look at my devastatingly
disfigured diminutive digit.
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DASTARDLY: Let me out of here
this instant!
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-I'll sue you for malpractice.
-It must be the Doctor's lunch break.
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00:02:22,644 --> 00:02:25,514
-(DASTARDLY SPEAKING
INDISTINCTLY) -(BURPS) Oh. Excuse me.
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00:02:25,580 --> 00:02:29,380
I think Mr. Hyde ate something
that's disagreeing with me.
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(RETCHING)
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(CAT YOWLS)
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(SNIFFING)
You smell like hot dogs.
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I was at a ballgame earlier.
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(RETCHES)
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Caught a foul ball, too.
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I'll say you're a foul ball!
How dare you?
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00:02:44,298 --> 00:02:47,498
Wait, wait!
Did you say, "Mr. Hyde"?
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00:02:47,567 --> 00:02:49,897
Then you're Dr. Jekyll.
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00:02:49,970 --> 00:02:51,570
Oh, I've always
wanted to meet you!
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00:02:51,639 --> 00:02:54,209
But, Dr. Jekyll is
just a character out of a storybook.
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-He's not real.
-Forgive me, fair lady.
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00:02:56,410 --> 00:02:59,180
Much is the experience
of long and toilsome voyaging,
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00:02:59,246 --> 00:03:00,646
that there are sights
and wonders
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00:03:00,714 --> 00:03:02,684
in this fair Earth
beyond the ken
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00:03:02,749 --> 00:03:04,549
of many a weary wander.
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00:03:04,618 --> 00:03:06,018
Who's this guy, now?
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00:03:06,086 --> 00:03:07,916
I have the honor of being
Captain Lemuel Gulliver,
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retired ship's master,
surgeon, and your obedient servant, sir.
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(STAMMERS) Gulliver?
FromGulliver's Travels?
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But that's my favorite book!
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Well, I... (GIGGLES NERVOUSLY)
Are you really "the" Gulliver?
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I am indeed, fair lady.
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00:03:20,901 --> 00:03:23,471
Oh! (GIGGLING)
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00:03:23,537 --> 00:03:24,837
(SNORTS) I'm uh...
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How handsome! (GASPING)
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Aren't you made up, too?
How are you here?
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(GIGGLING) Here's my hand...
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-He kissed my hand. (GASPS)
-(THUDS)
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All for one!
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00:03:38,119 --> 00:03:40,219
Musketeers,
our companion d'Artagnan
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needs assistancetout de suite, n'est-ce pas?
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(LAUGHS)
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-I'm not d'Artagnan.
-Our mistake.
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00:03:46,828 --> 00:03:50,928
I.Q.: Let me out!
I'm telling you, my name's not Alice!
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00:03:50,998 --> 00:03:53,528
Something very weird
is going on here.
92
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Did anyone lose an Alice?
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00:03:55,102 --> 00:03:57,272
And right in the middle
of our tea party.
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00:03:57,338 --> 00:04:00,138
You're very rude,
and I'm very mad about it.
95
00:04:00,207 --> 00:04:04,177
-Mad! Mad, I say!
-(RETCHES)
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00:04:04,245 --> 00:04:07,345
Oh! Wonderful! Anyone for tea?
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00:04:07,415 --> 00:04:09,415
(SLURPS)
Eh, you call this tea?
98
00:04:09,484 --> 00:04:11,054
Where are the frogs
and snail bits?
99
00:04:11,118 --> 00:04:12,848
Would you like one lump
or four?
100
00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:14,490
Four,s'il vous plait.
101
00:04:14,554 --> 00:04:16,294
(GRUNTING)
102
00:04:16,357 --> 00:04:19,057
Oh, I say, I'll have that tea
for the poor,
103
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-because I am--
-Let me guess... Robin Hood.
104
00:04:21,929 --> 00:04:23,559
Oh, does it show?
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00:04:23,630 --> 00:04:25,370
Avez, Musketeers.
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00:04:25,433 --> 00:04:27,873
We must protect these
small triangle sandwiches from this brigand,
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00:04:27,935 --> 00:04:29,795
with our very lives.
108
00:04:29,870 --> 00:04:31,040
(GROWLS)
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Give them all to me!
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00:04:32,406 --> 00:04:34,136
My last meal
disagreed with me.
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00:04:34,208 --> 00:04:36,638
Those sandwiches
belong to the poor, honest,
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00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:38,050
unwashed people of England.
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(ALL GRUNTING)
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00:04:39,781 --> 00:04:42,221
Is anyone else confused,
or is it just me as usual?
115
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-(ALL AGREEING)
-Join the club.
116
00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:47,716
(COUGHING)
117
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Perhaps I can clear the air.
118
00:04:49,457 --> 00:04:52,057
-And you are?
-I am Merlin.
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00:04:52,126 --> 00:04:56,196
Welcome, my fellow fictionites
to Wordsworld.
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-"Fictionites"?
-But, of course.
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00:04:57,932 --> 00:05:00,472
This is where all the greatest
fictional characters exist.
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00:05:00,535 --> 00:05:03,495
-"Fictional"?
You mean, made up? -But we're real.
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(LAUGHING) Good one.
124
00:05:06,073 --> 00:05:08,613
No, we're really real.
We're the Wacky Racers.
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00:05:08,676 --> 00:05:12,576
-Oh, right,
that sounds very real. -We're here by accident.
126
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Captain, you haven't been
approved by the Editor?
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"Editor"? Who's that?
128
00:05:17,752 --> 00:05:19,622
Oh, he's the one
who judges all the characters,
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00:05:19,687 --> 00:05:22,087
and whether they're worthy
of Wordsworld.
130
00:05:22,156 --> 00:05:23,956
And what precisely happens,
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if one isn't
Wordsworld worthy?
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-We edit you out. Forever.
-The handsome ones, too?
133
00:05:30,030 --> 00:05:31,770
Only the Great Maker
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00:05:31,833 --> 00:05:34,773
may reverse
the Editor's judgment of a character's worth.
135
00:05:34,836 --> 00:05:37,406
What kind of person
just judges others like that?
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00:05:37,471 --> 00:05:39,441
Eh, he got a degree
in screenwriting
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-and couldn't find other work.
-That figures.
138
00:05:41,676 --> 00:05:44,446
Oh, great, another crazy,
evil, unoriginal,
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00:05:44,512 --> 00:05:46,712
ugly, smelly,
overdressed goofball villain
140
00:05:46,780 --> 00:05:49,380
with bad hair,
bad breath, and--
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00:05:49,450 --> 00:05:52,450
And he's right behind us,
isn't he?
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Yes.
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00:05:54,088 --> 00:05:58,058
Who be these strangers
in our most strange land?
144
00:05:58,125 --> 00:06:00,385
Oh, wow, you're a big fella.
145
00:06:00,461 --> 00:06:03,331
Uh, hi, um,
we're the Wacky Racers.
146
00:06:03,397 --> 00:06:06,967
Famous quality characters
from children's, uh, entertainment.
147
00:06:07,034 --> 00:06:09,044
Oh! Never heard of you.
148
00:06:09,103 --> 00:06:11,943
You're not on that
television thing, are you?
149
00:06:12,005 --> 00:06:13,775
Uh, not really, no.
150
00:06:13,841 --> 00:06:16,111
-We were huge in the '60s.
-Well, our episodes are online...
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00:06:16,176 --> 00:06:18,876
-(STUTTERS) ...if you--
-(YELLS) "Online"?
152
00:06:18,946 --> 00:06:22,316
Nothing of quality is online!
153
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You shall be expunged
from existence!
154
00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:27,716
Not so fast, Editor.
155
00:06:27,788 --> 00:06:29,518
They say they are real.
156
00:06:29,590 --> 00:06:31,560
And you may only judge
the fictional.
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00:06:31,626 --> 00:06:34,686
Huh? But they're far too silly
and poorly written
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00:06:34,761 --> 00:06:36,161
to be anything but fictional.
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00:06:36,230 --> 00:06:39,600
(LAUGHS EXCITEDLY) I like
the way the dog giggles.
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(SNICKERING)
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00:06:41,769 --> 00:06:46,639
Enough! Nothing stands
between me and my sacred duty!
162
00:06:46,707 --> 00:06:48,577
(LAUGHS) He said "doody."
163
00:06:48,643 --> 00:06:51,383
I suggest you get to
the Great Maker, quickly!
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00:06:51,445 --> 00:06:53,105
Come on, everyone,
to the cars.
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00:06:53,180 --> 00:06:54,350
The Maker? No!
166
00:06:54,415 --> 00:06:56,845
PENELOPE:
Head to the mountaintop!
167
00:06:56,917 --> 00:06:58,417
Were they real?
168
00:06:58,485 --> 00:06:59,915
Is anyone?
169
00:06:59,988 --> 00:07:04,988
No poorly written
work of fiction escapes the Editor.
170
00:07:06,293 --> 00:07:08,203
BELLA: Brothers, look out!
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-Bella!
-Tiny!
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00:07:09,629 --> 00:07:11,579
They're gone.
173
00:07:16,571 --> 00:07:19,641
-I've got you now!
-PETER: Penny, look out!
174
00:07:19,706 --> 00:07:20,806
-Peter!
-Oh, no.
175
00:07:20,874 --> 00:07:22,844
But the Maker can still save--
176
00:07:22,910 --> 00:07:24,650
Oh, I.Q., darling.
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00:07:24,712 --> 00:07:27,252
Let's see if you can
take it as well as you can dish it out.
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00:07:27,314 --> 00:07:29,054
Muttley, give him
all we've got.
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00:07:29,116 --> 00:07:30,676
(MUTTLEY GRUNTS)
180
00:07:30,751 --> 00:07:33,821
Uh-oh.
181
00:07:33,887 --> 00:07:36,657
PENELOPE:
We got to keep going!
182
00:07:36,724 --> 00:07:39,364
That's the mountain
but the bridge is the only way across.
183
00:07:39,427 --> 00:07:40,927
DASTARDLY:
It'll never hold our cars.
184
00:07:40,994 --> 00:07:42,304
Do you have any missiles left?
185
00:07:42,363 --> 00:07:44,373
Well, just a little one,
and a rope and this bomb
186
00:07:44,432 --> 00:07:47,332
my mater got me
for my sweet 16 party.
187
00:07:47,401 --> 00:07:49,871
(EDITOR LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
188
00:07:49,937 --> 00:07:51,407
(YELLS)
189
00:07:51,472 --> 00:07:53,612
You go on, Dastardly,
I'll stay and distract him.
190
00:07:53,673 --> 00:07:55,283
You know what that means?
191
00:07:55,343 --> 00:07:57,843
Just make sure you find
this Great Maker and get our friends back.
192
00:07:57,911 --> 00:07:59,351
Dastardly, I'm trusting you.
193
00:07:59,413 --> 00:08:02,453
Yes. (STAMMERS)
Yes, you are, aren't you?
194
00:08:02,516 --> 00:08:04,846
-Get going, Dastardly.
-(TIRES SCREECHING)
195
00:08:04,919 --> 00:08:07,249
-(GROWLS)
-All right, Editor, I'm gonna prove to you
196
00:08:07,321 --> 00:08:08,821
just how real I am.
197
00:08:08,890 --> 00:08:11,830
If you weren't just characters
in a story,
198
00:08:11,892 --> 00:08:13,232
you couldn't be erased.
199
00:08:13,294 --> 00:08:15,204
Excuse me, Pitstop,
could you just hold this?
200
00:08:15,262 --> 00:08:16,332
Dastardly, what are you doing?
201
00:08:16,397 --> 00:08:20,997
-Betraying you.
-(BEEPS)
202
00:08:21,068 --> 00:08:22,298
I trusted you!
203
00:08:22,369 --> 00:08:24,499
Well, that wasn't
a very good idea, was it?
204
00:08:24,571 --> 00:08:25,571
Dastardly!
205
00:08:25,640 --> 00:08:27,940
We both know
I'd just mess it all up.
206
00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:29,378
You're the hero!
207
00:08:29,443 --> 00:08:31,653
I'm just the devilishly
handsome heartthrob.
208
00:08:31,712 --> 00:08:36,712
-I'll still edit her!
-Not without the bridge.
209
00:08:36,783 --> 00:08:38,053
Good luck, Pitstop.
210
00:08:38,118 --> 00:08:40,948
(CHUCKLES, GASPS)
211
00:08:41,021 --> 00:08:44,931
No!
212
00:08:44,992 --> 00:08:46,032
Jump, Muttley!
213
00:08:46,093 --> 00:08:47,533
Dastardly saved us both.
214
00:08:47,595 --> 00:08:50,555
You've escaped me,
but you're still just a story!
215
00:08:50,631 --> 00:08:53,171
-Come on, Muttley,
we have to get going. -(MUTTLEY WHIMPERS)
216
00:08:53,233 --> 00:08:54,843
Like Dastardly wanted us to.
217
00:08:54,901 --> 00:08:56,771
(BOTH GRUNT)
218
00:08:56,837 --> 00:08:59,307
Oh, it just never ends.
219
00:08:59,373 --> 00:09:02,183
There's always
another bridge to cross.
220
00:09:02,242 --> 00:09:03,812
(SIGHS) Oh, Muttley.
221
00:09:03,878 --> 00:09:06,448
-GREAT MAKER:
The metaphor is a bit heavy. -Hmm?
222
00:09:06,514 --> 00:09:09,084
I'll fix it
in the rewrite. Tea?
223
00:09:09,149 --> 00:09:10,619
So, you wanted to see me?
224
00:09:10,685 --> 00:09:14,455
My friends.
The Editor erased them.
225
00:09:14,522 --> 00:09:16,792
He said we weren't real,
and he just...
226
00:09:16,857 --> 00:09:19,387
(TEARFULLY) He just...
227
00:09:19,460 --> 00:09:21,630
I guess we were only stories
after all.
228
00:09:21,696 --> 00:09:23,826
What's wrong with being
a story?
229
00:09:23,898 --> 00:09:27,028
I think
the important thing is being a good story.
230
00:09:27,100 --> 00:09:28,440
But what about my friends?
231
00:09:28,502 --> 00:09:30,772
The characters
from our favorite stories
232
00:09:30,837 --> 00:09:32,207
never really go away.
233
00:09:32,272 --> 00:09:33,712
Not in our hearts.
234
00:09:33,774 --> 00:09:36,044
DASTARDLY: Pitstop?
PETER: Penelope?
235
00:09:36,109 --> 00:09:38,179
-Good evening.
-You're back!
236
00:09:38,245 --> 00:09:41,315
You're all back!
Oh, I thought I'd lost you!
237
00:09:41,382 --> 00:09:43,182
Stop that,
you malingering mongrel!
238
00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:45,450
You're giving my glove
dog breath!
239
00:09:45,519 --> 00:09:47,189
(STUTTERS) What happened?
240
00:09:47,254 --> 00:09:50,264
Uh, I think
I remember wearing a dress.
241
00:09:50,324 --> 00:09:51,864
I wake up like that
a lot, too.
242
00:09:51,926 --> 00:09:54,956
She brought you back!
She brought you all--
243
00:09:55,028 --> 00:09:56,798
-Where'd she go?
-Where'd who go?
244
00:09:56,863 --> 00:09:58,073
PENELOPE: The Great Maker.
245
00:09:58,131 --> 00:09:59,371
ALL: Whoa!
246
00:09:59,433 --> 00:10:03,203
(ALL SCREAMING)
247
00:10:03,270 --> 00:10:05,140
So, when I'm not
in most of an episode,
248
00:10:05,205 --> 00:10:06,835
I go do video game voices.
249
00:10:06,907 --> 00:10:09,807
(ALL SCREAMING)
250
00:10:09,876 --> 00:10:11,346
(ALL GROAN)
251
00:10:11,412 --> 00:10:14,482
Bleh, I feel like a dirty moat
at low tide.
252
00:10:14,548 --> 00:10:17,618
I think Mr. Dastardly's
reality-mingling meta missile
253
00:10:17,685 --> 00:10:19,145
must have
made us all hallucinate.
254
00:10:19,219 --> 00:10:20,219
Hmm.
255
00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:22,357
Well, what are we waiting for?
256
00:10:22,423 --> 00:10:24,263
Our story is
just getting started.
257
00:10:24,325 --> 00:10:29,055
(ENGINES REVVING)
258
00:10:29,129 --> 00:10:33,169
(SNICKERING)
259
00:10:33,233 --> 00:10:35,443
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
260
00:10:35,493 --> 00:10:40,043
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