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(SNICKERING)
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HOST:Hey, hey, Wacky Race fans.
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Welcome to the legendary enchanted forest,
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where today's magical race from here to Granny's house will be taking place.
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And speaking of magical,
this race will have a guest racer.
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That wonderful
world-famous wizard, Winsome Witch.
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Hello.
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It's great to have you racing
with us today, Miss Witch.
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Oh, that's very, um, nice.
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Uh, thank you.
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And good luck to all our racers.
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Look at this place.
Oh, it's just all so, magical.
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Um, huh, yeah. It is, isn't it?
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I thought you'd be
happy about that, being magic yourself.
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(STUTTERS) Oh, I haven't
had so much luck with the magic.
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See, I lost my confidence.
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(STUTTERS) Well, see,
I've had...
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A few of my spells
have gone a little terribly, terribly wrong.
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Just atrocities, actually.
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Oops.
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(WOMAN SCREAMING)
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Oops.
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I'm gonna be a real boy.
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Oh, Pinocchio?
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Oh, that's just awful.
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I thought if I won a race,
that might restore my confidence.
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I'm sure you'll succeed.
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Yes, at failing.
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Dastardly, be positive.
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Fine. I'm positive she'll fail.
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What kind of ridiculous racer
always has their actions backfire on them.
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(BLASTING)
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(SCREAMING)
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Drat!
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Yes, I see the irony.
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Racers, to your cars.
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(ENGINES REVVING)
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Oh.
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(CHUCKLING)
My, this is very exciting.
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Oh, just you wait, Winnie,
there should be an exciting complication any time now.
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Yes, this is about the time
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in every episode, when
Dastardly thinks of an ingenious way to cheat.
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Muttley, I've just thought
of an ingenious way to cheat.
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(SNICKERING)
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(GRUNTING)
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There, place your puppy peepers
on this perfectly placed
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postero predicament incidentally
inspired by a similar trap set by the big bad wolf.
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Aha! Hurry, you lingering mutt,
get the basket in place.
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Here they come.
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(SCREECHING)
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TINY: Goody. Good.
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I don't see any goodies.
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TINY:Goodies bad.
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Hah, this is going to be easier
than Humpty Dumpty falling off a wall.
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(GROANING) Not cool, bro.
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Not cool.
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Hey, that guy can't use
my big basket of goodies trap.
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That thing's trade marked.
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Muttley, aren't you done yet?
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-It better be deep enough.
-(GROWLING)
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Geniuses wish free.
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Hey, I'm a genius.
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What should I wish for?
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-(SNIGGERING)
-(SCREAMING)
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I wish I wasn't falling
into a wishing well.
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This is too easy.
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We should do
all our racing here.
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(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
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Hey, who put
an unauthorized wishing well here?
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-Yo, it's still skidding.
-Hi ho, wolfie.
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Hey, you know
what's going on here?
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Yeah, it's some purple guy
with a snickering rat
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is setting traps for
these weirdos trying to get to Grandma's house.
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Is he a licensed
fairy tale villain?
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I haven't seen him
in any union meetings.
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Call everybody. We're gonna
drop some classic fairy tale beat down on this fool.
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(TIRES SCREECHES)
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What the... Well, look at that.
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That's suspiciously placed
magic spinning wheel.
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I'd love to try it even though
there's every chance I'd prick my finger on
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the magic spinning needle
and fall under it's spell.
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Oh, well. I guess
I'll just get back to the race.
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(GROANING)
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Thank goodness.
I didn't prick my finger.
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-Little help?
-(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
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-Evil is fun.-I'm in a lot of pain.
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PETER: Someone call
a chiropractor.
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Oh, hello, Rumple.
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Well, he just used
my spinning wheels
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slash anvil, stick on some guy
with a chin you wouldn't believe.
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Yeah. Well, okay.
I'll be right there.
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Yoo hoo.
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Won't you stop and help
a harmless old lady?
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Oh, dear. A harmless old lady
with a mustache needs help.
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Don't worry. I know a place
that does great facial wax.
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No, no, my dear.
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I just need someone to
walk into my perfectly normal cottage
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and check to see
if there are any dragons in it.
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Well, of course.
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Hello? No dragons here.
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Hey, what's happening?
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Dastardly, is that you?
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Miss Penelope.
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This will teach you
to cheat like that.
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By the powers of
this mighty mage, I capture you in a smelly cage.
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Yep, I really should have
seen that one coming.
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(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
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I wouldn't have had to say
smelly cage.
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This isn't working out
like a fairy tale is supposed to at all.
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For one thing,
this whole episode's got a smarmy tone.
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For another,
the bad guy is winning.
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And there hasn't even
been a decent song.
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(CHIRPING)
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Maybe that's why
you're here, little guy.
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(THROWING RASPBERRY)
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I'm free.
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We're not.
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It seems nothing ever
works out like it does in the old stories.
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♪ Have you ever sat and wondered ♪
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♪ If people have the dreams you do ♪
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♪ About walking out that door and never coming back ♪
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♪ Have you ever read a storyAbout someone lost or trapped ♪
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♪ You thought it hit a little close to end ♪
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♪ Well, I've read this story And I know how it ends ♪
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♪ A dream in that you're special ♪
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♪ Doesn't make your dreams come true ♪
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♪ It takes a risk A leap of faith ♪
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♪ I'm ready to jump So just give me space ♪
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♪ Adventure is calling out my name ♪
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♪ It's telling me that it's time to escape ♪
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♪ Sun and wind and the air in your hair ♪
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♪ It's calling from so far away ♪
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♪ It's hard to hear ♪
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♪ Every day ♪
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♪ But I know in my heart That I'm ready to start ♪
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♪ It takes a risk ♪
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♪ A leap of faith ♪
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♪ I'm ready to jump So just give me some space ♪
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♪ I'll go as far away as I can ♪
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♪ I was meant for more Than these ♪
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♪ I just need some space ♪
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♪ To fly ♪
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Huh? Oh, Philly.
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Why does that never work?
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(GRUMBLES)
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This episode's
even worse than usual.
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-Thanks, Penelope.
-You're welcome.
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Now, let's get the others.
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(GASPING)
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Oh, no. Looks like
Dicky's in trouble again.
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This certainly spells trouble.
Spells! That's it.
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Winnie can use her magic
to sign Dastardly.
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What? Oh, no.
I'll just make things worse.
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Well, probably. But worst case,
Dastardly just gets eaten or something.
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That's a risk
I'm willing to take.
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All you need to do
is believe in yourself, Winnie.
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That's easy for you to say.
You're... you.
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You get to sing special songs.
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You have that
hip to waist ratio.
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Winnie, you need to try.
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A man you've only just met
and who locked in a cage is counting on you.
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00:09:02,009 --> 00:09:03,509
You're right.
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00:09:03,577 --> 00:09:06,747
Ippity, pippity, hoppity, hop.
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(EXCLAIMING IN AWE)
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(ALL SCREAMING)
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This is working out great.
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Oops.
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(STRAINING)
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What makes someone feel
good about themselves?
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Ooh, a transfusion.
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Kitten sandwiches.
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-The Internet?
-Singing two songs in one episode?
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♪ It takes ♪
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Nice try.
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00:09:27,201 --> 00:09:29,101
The answer is friends do.
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If your friends believe in you,
then you have to believe in yourself.
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I don't have any friends.
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-Sure you do.
-Huh?
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(EXCLAIMING)
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Well, it's about time.
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To save this racer
from being torn, turn those spellings to beeline torn.
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(ALL MEWING)
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You would've save me sooner
but for that silly song.
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Snacks.
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Winnie, thanks
for saving the day.
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You can join us racers
any time you want to.
187
00:10:02,536 --> 00:10:04,306
Ah, well, thank you, Penelope.
188
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I think we all learned
an important lesson today.
189
00:10:06,574 --> 00:10:08,884
-Um, I don't think so.
-I never do.
190
00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:10,942
Kittens tasty.
191
00:10:11,011 --> 00:10:12,181
What?
192
00:10:12,246 --> 00:10:15,476
Friends make magic. Good.
193
00:10:15,549 --> 00:10:17,379
So true, big fella.
194
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-That they do.
-You said it too, brother.
195
00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:21,917
WINNIE: Indubitably.
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00:10:21,990 --> 00:10:24,890
PENELOPE: Tiny, you ate
the kittens, didn't you?
197
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(TINY BELCHING)
198
00:10:26,538 --> 00:10:31,088
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