All language subtitles for Life With Derek s04e11 How I Met Your Stepbrother.eng

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Original subtitles

[twinkling music]

[twinkling music]

- Emily! - Bonjour.

- Oh, you look amazing! - Thank you!

- How was France? - Magnifique! And what do you

think about my new look for the new year? - I love it!

Can you believe that grade 12 starts in 3 days.

- I know! What do you think you'll be changing for the new year?

- Other than trading in my stepbrother, I hadn't really thought about it.

- Emily, you look amazing! - Thank you!

Are you excited about Vancouver? - Ah! If by excited you mean,

terrified, then yeah. My flight leaves Sunday afternoon.

- Oh, c'mon! It'll be an adventure.

And what a perfect way to get rid of your annoying boyfriend.

- Casey, I don't want to get rid of Derek.

Even the thought of saying goodbye and...

well, I feel like crying.

- So maybe you should take him with you! - Oh! I only wish I could.

- How does Derek feel about you leaving? - Well, doesn't seem

to be affecting him. - Hey, Sals! Check it out... I can juggle.

Oh!

- Ah! - I can do better than that.

- Well, it's definitely affected his juggling skills.

- Spoons!

- ♪ Used to be my mother and my sister and me ♪

♪ A happy little family and all right with me ♪

♪ But Mom got married, that's when everything changed ♪

♪ Some things were lost and others were gained ♪

♪ A new school... A new house... ♪

♪ So many changes it makes my head spin ♪

♪ Now I've got a brother who gets under my skin ♪

♪ This is life with Derek ♪

♪ This is life with Derek ♪

♪ This is life with Lizzie, Edwin, George and Nora ♪

♪ Marti and Casey ♪

♪ Living life with Derek ♪

♪ Living life with Derek ♪

- For teenagers, the real New Year is the New School Year.

Time for new resolutions to make... and break.

Like, Derek could resolve to be

a kinder and gentler soul

as opposed to the insensitive, immature,

inconsiderate stepbrother he is.

- Boy, am I looking forward

to 3 days of R & R.

- Are you kidding? Three days is barely enough time

to get everyone ready to go back to school.

- What's wrong with the stuff they already have? - None of these clothes fit.

- Have a growth spurt overnight? - No, they don't fit the way

I want to look now. Any of them.

- Lizzie, buying all new clothes isn't reasonable.

- Then I refuse to go back to school. Is that reasonable?

- I told you this weekend was gonna be busy.

- So one out of 5 kids is having... issues. [Door open]

Hey, there! Did you have fun biking with Ella?

- Nope. - Do you want to talk about it?

- Nope. - Well, you want to go upstairs

with me to see if you need any new school clothes for Tuesday?

- Nope. - Because you don't need any clothes?

- Because I'm not going to school!

Ever again! - Okay,

2 out of 5, but I still like our odds.

- Lose that. Garbage. Junk. Pathetic.

- Freaking out already? School hasn't even started yet.

- If you must know, I've decided what I'm changing before school starts.

- Oh, your address? - No! My room.

This is the old me, not the new me so

I'm completely redoing it.

Oh, would you like my nesting doll collection?

- Well, I do need a goodbye gift for Sally. - Oh! Classy!

Hey, I have an idea. Why don't you change

your address and follow Sally out West?

Ah, think how well we'd get along

with 3 prairie provinces and the Rockies between us!

- Y'know, that's not a bad idea.

- Oh, good! Great. I'm glad I could help.

Now take this lovely parting gift and get out.

- Hey, Smarti, what's with Lizzie's clothes?

- I'm not in here. And I don't want to talk about it.

- That's cool. Just tell me when you're ready.

I think it'd be okay if I gave Edwin

Casey's old dolls, right?

- Hey, Ed! Nora thinks you might need some

back to school clothes or supplies. - No thanks. I am fully clothed

and fully stocked. I can't wait to get back to school!

- Good! Why?

- 'Cuz my girlfriend Michelle!

You know, someone to walk the halls with,

do my homework with and, ah, share my lunch with.

- When does Michelle get back from camp?

- Today. So I gotta go grab her a welcome back gift.

- Oh, while you're at it, can you pick up Sally a "Hey, sorry you're leaving" gift.

- Oh, classy! - Derek.

Nora wants to know if you need any school supplies.

- I don't study. Why would I need supplies?

- Since you brought that up, um...

- I'll leave you two alone. - No, Nora, you come.

- Derek, I want to talk to you about your attitude about school.

Grade twelve? It's a make or break year for you.

- Hey, make a break. Good idea.

- I know Sally leaving is going to be hard,

but without a girlfriend you'll be able to focus on your studies

and your university applications. - No girlfriend,

lots of studying, university applications.

Great! Thanks, Dad.

- You're welcome.

[Knock! Knock!] - I'm busy.

- I made you a grilled cheese sandwich.

Mmm... Unless you don't like grilled cheese any more either?

Ah! It's just a joke.

C'mon, Lizard, what's going on?

- What's going on is that my clothes are ugly and boring.

And, please, don't call me Lizard.

- Oh, I thought your clothes were cute and practical, Lizar... eee.

- Mom, you buy my clothes from the boy's section!

- Yeah, but boy's clothes are cheaper and stronger.

- Well, maybe now I'd like more expensive and girlier clothes.

- Okay. I'll go get that big box of Casey's clothes.

- Why am I the one that has to wear hand-me-downs? Casey doesn't!

- Yeah, well she's the oldest.

- Well, what about those clothes from Icky Cousin Vicky she refused to wear?

How come I'm the that has to wear hand-me-downs and boy's clothes?

You're the worst mother in the whole world!

- In the whole world? - Well,

maybe not in the whole world,

but definitely in all of Ontario!

- Someone wants to change and all before school starts in 2 days.

- How did you know?

You are the best Mother in the whole world.

- I don't know! Maybe in Ontario.

Ha, uh, Casey, what's going on here?

- Oh, I need to redecorate my room. Basically nothing works.

- But I thought you had such a nice room.

- For a girl.

I am a year away from university, Mom!

My room should define me.

And how can I define myself if my room isn't who I am now?

- And who are you now? - I don't know!

Am I a colorful hippy or an avant-garde anti-trendoid

or a whimsical poet. I mean, it is amazing

that I can even get dressed in the morning without knowing the answer to that question!

- So you have to figure out who you are before you redecorate your room?

- Yes and I don't have a lot of time to pick a new identity!

- But a whole new identity costs a whole lot of money.

- Mom, are you saying I'm not worth it?

- Ah, ah...

No.

Now it's 3 out of 5 having back-to-school issues.

Casey's having an identity crisis,

Lizzie's having a wardrobe crisis and Marti's eaten her second meal in her tent

and she won't tell me why. - Interesting how it's only the girls of the house

who are in crisis mode. - You think?

- Now that I think about it, not interesting in the slightest.

- Can you believe this is the last time we'll share a meal together?

Maybe in our whole lives? - You know, the service here

is lousy! Maybe we should just wait on ourselves?

- You make jokes, but I know you feel it, too.

I don't know how I'm gonna say goodbye to you.

- Hey, we do not have to say our real goodbyes until tomorrow at the airport.

- I know, I know.

But, ah, just, ah, get ready for the tears.

- You're not gonna cry are you?

- No! I meant my Dad! He's a total mush.

But, ah,

I'll probably be crying, too. I'm probably going to cry all the way to Vancouver.

- Yeah! By Saskatchewan,

you'll have forgotten all about me.

- No.

I won't.

- Oh, no, please

don't... look it! I can juggle cutlery, eh?

- No you can't.

- Ah, please. Then don't be sad.

For me?

- Okay, okay.

I'm not upset.

- Dad, I need the couch. - Hnh? Forget it!

- Please! It's an emergency! - Is something wrong, Ed?

- Yeah. ‘kay, Brent is wrong.

- Brent who? - Michelle's new boyfriend-she met-doing-archery-at-camp,

that's who. He shot an arrow through her heart

and now my heart's broken. - Ah, sorry, Ed.

You know, I bet it's gonna hurt like heck for a few days,

then you'll get back to school, you'll forget all about her.

- I'm not going back to school. How can I get over Michelle

when I'm going to see her every day? You'll just have to home-school me.

- Ed, I work. - Fine. I'll watch educational television.

Thanks for your concern.

- Four out of five kids freaking out. - Dad... need to talk to you.

- Don't tell me you have a problem too? - No.

But I'm gonna drop out of high school and move out West,

get a job so I can be near Sally. Well, goodnight.

[Knock! Knock!]

- Casey, I need to talk to you about something

really important. - Mom,

I am mid-crisis! I thought mauve was my colour,

but now it leaves me cold. My room should reflect who I am, right?

But am I fun, serious, sardonic, bold, subtle?

- How about self-absorbed? - Ha! That is not really a style,

but okay. - Look, Casey, I'm sorry.

It's just that last night, out of the blue,

Derek told us that he was dropping out

of high school to follow Sally to Vancouver.

- What? Where did he come up with a crazy idea like that?

- I don't know! - Oh! Unless he got it from me. - Casey!

- It was a joke! - Ah! Good one! - Figures.

The only time Derek would take anything I say seriously is when I'm kidding around.

- Ooh, maybe if you joked him into it, you could joke him out of it!

- Isn't that a George thing?

- George is just trying to keep calm.

- What is wrong with this family?

Marti is living in her tent, Lizzie hates her clothes,

you hate your room, Edwin says he'll never love again

and now Derek? He wants to drop out of school!

- Well, what did he say when you tried to talk him out of it?

- He won't say anything to anything. I've tried reasoning,

yelling, bribing. Nothing works.

- George. I am willing to set aside

my problems to try and talk some sense into your problem child.

- I appreciate that, Casey, but I mean why?

I'd have thought you'd want him to leave.

- Because I don't want to see him do

something monumentally stupid,

even if it was my suggestion.

- Your what? - It was a joke!

- Well, good one! - Okay, George! It is okay.

I can fix this. Now you and Nora go for a quiet relaxing meal,

while I mobilize my team.

Hey, Liz, I need your help.

- And I need clothes, new ones.

And not your hand-me-downs ‘cuz I'm not you. - Okay, um...

What kind of clothes do you want? - I don't know!

I just know I want to change my look before school starts.

And if I don't do it on the first day, I'll have to wait a whole other year.

- How ‘bout I take you to a few stores tomorrow?

- Okay! But what about your re-decorating project?

- Well, I've put my issues on hold temporarily.

In fact, we all have to because there's a real family crisis

and Mom and George need our help.

- What did Derek do? - He's threatening to drop out of school

to follow Sally to Vancouver. - Does Edwin know about this?

- Edwin hasn't been himself since Michelle dumped him.

- Edwin got dumped?! Where have I been?!

- Hey! Can't a guy just wallow in peace?

- I'm sorry to hear about Michelle.

- Yeah. I got dumped. For an archer!

- An archer? - Yeah, and apparently he's also quite the gletcher.

- Wait, what's a gletcher? - Glass etcher.

- Sounds lame. And Michelle's lame for dumping you.

But in a few months, she'll be sorry, but you'll have moved on.

- I will? - Edwin, I never told you this ‘cause I didn't want it

going to your head, but a couple of my friends like you.

- Really? Well, which ones?

- I can't name names. That wouldn't be fair.

But pull yourself together, man. Girls like a guy with confidence.

- But, Lizzie, all my confidence was stolen by the gletcher-archer!

- That's a blow, I have to admit. But fake it.

I'll help. Meanwhile, we gotta solve a bigger problem.

- There's a bigger problem than mine?

- Derek's dropping out of school. - What?

Why is this the first I'm hearing of this?

- My analysis is that it's not a bluff.

Derek's deluded enough to actually follow through on a plan like this.

- But Sally can't want Derek to drop out.

- Well, my guess is that he hasn't told her yet. - So there might still be

enough time to change his mind. - Well, we'll just have to go in there together and tell him

that he's making a terrible mistake. - Let's do it!

- No! That would be the worst thing you could possibly do.

Whenever you tell Derek not to do something he always does it!

Like when he was 6 and Dad told him not to eat worms.

- Gross! - Ew.

- So, he likes to play the opposite game.

I'm going in. - Good luck, soldier.

[Knock! Knock!] - Dad, there is nothing to talk about.

I've made up my mind. - Actually, it's me.

- My Dad sent you to talk to me out of going?

- Heck, no! Because I agree with what you're doing.

Actually, I applaud it. - Oh, you do?

- Yes! And I am deeply touched

that you took my suggestion.

Ah! It's so crazy, it's so

romantic, to just throw away your whole future like that

to follow your heart. My goodness,

Derek, did I ever have you figured wrong.

- Casey, it's not that big of a sacrifice.

I could always go back to high school a year later.

- Now, come on, who'd want to go back to school

when he'd be a year older than everyone else?

Actually, you'd be 2 years older

because of failing grade one, right? - Nice try, Casey,

but pretending to admire what I'm doing

to get me to change my mind isn't working.

- I'm not pretending!

I admire you very much! Please, go! I insist!

- Oh. Okay, well then I will, thanks, Case.

- Wait, wait! I didn't mean that.

- But you just said it. - We were playing the opposite game!

- Nnnnn. - Derek,

you can't drop out of school!

Even you're not stupid enough to do that!

- Ha! That's what you think.

- It doesn't fit.

- How'd it go?

- Well, I lost the opposite game and then I called him stupid.

- Curious strategy.

You know, how about I take a more sensitive, psychological approach?

- Can't do worse.

- Ed, finish my packing.

- Derek, I know why you're leaving.

- Yeah, everybody does. I want to be with Sally.

- Well, if you don't mind me saying so,

I think your reason is more... psychological.

You have a problem with emotions and you're afraid of the pain

of splitting up with Sally so you're trying to avoid it.

Believe me, as a man in pain,

I can relate.

- That's ridiculous.

So, why don't you stop relating

and start folding?

- Forget it, Derek!

No, I refuse to help you wreck your life.

- Then what good are you?

- Strike two. Now up to bat...

- Derek... - Lizzie... - Maybe...

- No. - But... - Sorry.

- Okay. - Bye.

[Bell]

- Sally? Hey!

I've been trying to call you. Doesn't your flight leave in 3 hours?

- Yes. But I've been doing some thinking...

and, uh... I can't get on that flight.

- Ah, did you lose your ticket?

Because I'm pretty sure that's all electronic. - No. I don't want to leave you.

So I'm going to go to university here instead!

Ah...

I said I'm going to go to university here instead!

- Sally, you can't do that.

- ‘Kay. Not really

the reaction that I was going for.

- UBC is an amazing opportunity.

You know, you have been dreaming about going out West since you were a little girl and you

and you shouldn't

give that up for me.

- But it hurts too much to leave you. - I feel the same way

and as Edwin pointed out,

I would go to any length to avoid feeling that bad.

- Well, it seemed like you were handling it pretty well. - Well,

I am a master of denial and even though I beat Casey

at the opposite game,

I think she might be right.

- The opposite game? - Yeah, she was trying to con me out of my plan

to drop out of high school. To follow you to Vancouver.

- You were really going to do that for me?

- I was. Then everyone freaked

and I realized that, you know,

as much of a pain high school is,

I should probably see it through.

- Hm.

Well, then this is it.

I'm really leaving and

we're really breaking up.

- Yeah.

- Okay. Well, I'm going to give you the ten-second warning.

- Tears? - Ten, nine,

eight, seven...

Aren't you gonna run?

- Not this time.

- Ahh!

- You guys can't watch... that's private!

What'd he say?

- He's not going. - He actually listened.

- What! We changed his mind? We did it!

- So Sally's gone, huh?

Need a hug?

- Thanks.

Because I needed that.

- Hi there.

- Everything okay? - Relax.

I have decided to stay and finish grade 12.

- Derek! That's terrific.

- Yeah, it is. Oh! - Enough hugging.

Eh, ye, ye, ye!

- I don't know what you did,

but I cannot thank you enough. - It was a team effort.

Edwin, Lizzie and me. - Oh! Speaking of Edwin and Lizzie!

- Edwin is standing upright and Lizzie and I are going shopping

for some new clothes and stuff for my room. So I need some money.

- You do as much back to school shopping as you want to

just as long as you go back to school!

- What about Marti? - Ah, she's still camping out in her tent.

- Smarti, get out here. - No, Smerek.

- Fine. But...

Sally left for Vancouver and

I'm really sad.

I could really use a, uh...

Special Smarti Smug.

That's the one!

Now,

why are you living in a tent?

- 'Cuz Ella can ride her bike

without training wheels and I can't.

- And that's why you don't want to go back to school?

- I'm in grade 3 and I still have training wheels.

Everyone's going to laugh at me.

- Hey, no one's gonna laugh at you

‘cause I'm gonna teach you to ride without training wheels.

- But I'm afraid to fall.

- Then we'll go to the park and you can fall on the grass.

And I'll run behind the bike holding on to it.

- No matter how fast I go?

- Oh, I would hold that bike even if it flew!

Like this!

Oh, did you lose a shoe?

- C'mon, everybody! Let's hustle!

- Whoa. You look different.

- Bad different or good different?

- Good different. Hey, c'mon! I wanna find out which one of your friends likes me!

- Oh, Liz, you really do look great.

- Thanks, Casey. For everything.

- Remember, Derek?

- Yep! The park, after school.

- Yep! - What for?

- Secret. Hey, you want a lift to school?

- I pay for gas? - Yeah. - We'll be on time?

- Ah, I'll see. - Down in a sec.

Closed Captioning by sette inc.

- Disclaimer: I‘m not funny in this scene.

- Casey, I need to talk to you...

- Well, make or break! I'm going...

- Derek's de-lu-oo-ded enough to actually follow through on...

- ♪ Living life with Derek ♪

♪ Living life with Derek ♪

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0

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