Original subtitles

[twinkling music]

[twinkling music]

- I can't look, I can't look. - Yes, you can, yes you can.

Cuz you got the lead in the musical!

[Screaming]

Um, I just hope your singing is as good as your shrieking.

- Um! I'm sorry, Em,

but after years being at an all-girls school,

I'm psyched to be in a play where the male lead is actually a male!

And who is my male lead? - Me. At least off stage.

- Max! Guess what? - You got the lead? - Who told?

- So who's my competition? I mean, your co-star?

- Well, probably the same guy who always gets the lead. Wendel Wiggins.

- I - I'm not the lead?

I'm not the lead?!

[Giggles]

- [Casey]: Well, who is?

- Noel Covington.

- I don't know a Noel. - Oh, I'm sure he's fine.

I've heard nothing but good things about Mrs. Zeldin's musicals.

- Yeah, I heard that too. - But neither of you have heard for yourselves?

- [Chuckling]: Like I'd ever go to a musical!

♪♪♪ That you weren't in.

- Well, no one else I know would ever be in a musical except...

Derek?

- Derek?!

- ♪ Used to be my mother and my sister and me ♪

♪ A happy little family and all right with me ♪

♪ But Mom got married that's when everything changed ♪

♪ Some things were lost and others were gained ♪

♪ A new school, a new house ♪

♪ So many changes it makes my head spin ♪

♪ Now I've got a brother who gets under my skin ♪

♪ This is life with Derek ♪

♪ This is life with Derek ♪

♪ This is life with Lizzie, Edwin, George and Nora, Marti and Casey ♪

♪ Living life with Derek ♪

♪ Living life with Derek ♪

a car with Derek is bad enough.

Now I have to share a stage?

He's like a zit that won't pop,

a rash that won't heal, a nose that keeps running!

He just won't go away!

- You're in the male chorus?

- Say it ain't so, bro. - Oh it so is!

And not only am I in the male chorus,

but I am the male chorus, surrounded by some very talented chorus girls.

♪♪♪ - I knew there was a reason.

- I assumed it was to bug me. - Oh, no, I can do that here.

I mean, if my minor role happens to cause you major pain?

Well, then, that's just a bonus.

- So, what's the show? - It's a romantic musical about pirates.

- It's gonna be hilarious. - Only if you turn it into a joke!

But Miss Zeldin's letting me help her with the choreography! How cool is that?

- What's a musical? - It's a play where the actors get to both talk and sing.

- Yeah, like out of nowhere they just burst into song.

- ♪♪ Nora could you pass the potatoes? - Why certainly ♪

- ♪ Here you go, Da-ad ♪

- ♪ Thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you. ♪

- ♪ May I be excused? ♪

- ♪ [George & Nora]: Yes! ♪♪

[Laughing]

- [Rapping]: My name is Eddy V, and I'm dropping down lines,

this ain't no haiku, so I'd like it to rhyme.

Yo, check it! Check it! My name is Eddy V and I'm dropping down...

- Eddy V? - Oh, it's my rap handle.

- Right, but this is the games closet, not your recording studio.

- But the acoustics are great! - Actually, it did sound sorta good! Who knew you could rap?

- I was having trouble writing that poem for English,

so I turned it into a rap and the words just started flowing.

- Y'know of all the weird things you've done,

this one sorta makes sense.

- Thanks Liz, that's really...

Hey!

[Derek chatting] - Welcome to the theatre!

I'm Mrs. Zeldin, your guide on this magical, musical journey.

Now before we spread our wings and set sail on this artistic voyage,

let's introduce ourselves and share why we're here.

Lights please.

- I'm Wendel. I'm here because I'm always in the play.

Actually I'm always the lead in the play.

Ex, except this one.

I'll be playing the evil pirate, Pete.

- Casting against type.

- Um, hi! I'm, I'm Casey.

I'm playing the Maiden Marina and I'm here because I love to sing and dance

and I really look forward to working with all of you.

- Thank you, Maiden Marina. Now, where's our hero?

Hello, Noel!

We're just introducing ourselves.

Tell us why you're here? - My friends dared me to audition.

- You got the lead on a dare? - I'm the lead?

- Wendel, I understand you're disappointed. Noel, I sense you're surprised.

But the theatre is about making big discoveries!

And in the role of Deck Hand Hart,

Noel will be this year's big discovery.

Are you as excited as I am?

- What I'd really like to do is direct.

- Thank you Derek. I'd like to start with a breathing exercise.

I want everyone to hold their diaphragms.

Derek, hold your own diaphragm.

Inhale! And... huh, huh, huh.

- Ready for lunch?

- Oh, I can't. I'm having lunch with Noel.

- Are we dating other people? Cuz you could have sent me an email.

- It's not a date, silly.

Miss Zeldin wants me and Noel to develop chemistry

to help make the magic happen on stage so I'm supposed to have lunch with him.

- Okay. Just don't develop too much chemistry.

- Ah, you're jealous!

But, c'mon, a lead in the musical versus a big strong quarterback?

There's no competition.

- I knew that.

- Hey, Noel!

So, should we go get to know each other?

- It's cool. I think I got you pegged. - You do, do you?

- You dance, sing, study, write poetry. Ah, you love movies,

you're dating the captain of the football team

and you've got much better things to do than eat lunch with me.

- No, I don't!

So, let's go!

[Clearing her throat]

So, what grade are you in? - Eleven.

- Oh, me too. Guess we run in different circles.

- Yeah. Look, my auditioning on a dare was a big mistake.

I mean, Deck Hand Hart in Yo Ho Hip Hop?

I mean, I'll never live this down with my mateys.

- Well since you've already got me pegged, you'll know that I'm really into musicals.

And I was thrilled to get the lead,

so if you're not gonna take this seriously, would you please just drop out now?

- Maybe I will.

- Okay, then, it was nice not getting to know you.

[Bell ringing]

What are you doing?

- Uh, just looking over the script. Why does this play have so many songs?

- Uh, cuz it's a musical.

But I meant what are you doing at rehearsal? I thought you were gonna drop out.

- No, no, you asked me to drop out,

but I only do things on dares.

- Well, if you're not quitting, I hope you're totally committed

because this play already has a clown.

- Arggh!

♪♪♪

- Give me back my pirate chapeau!

- Ah! You'll have to fight me for it! Arrgh!

- Ah, there are my leads! Gather round Wendel, Noel, Casey.

Now, in this first scene

the Maiden Marina is about to be swept off her feet

by the Deck Hand Hart only to be thwarted

by the arrival of the evil Pirate Pete.

Noel, why don't you take the first verse?

- Y'know, I'd, I'd love to.

But I just ate and you should always wait 15 minutes before singing.

- That's swimming, funny guy!

- Yeah, let's hear it.

[Clearing throat]

- ♪♪ I gave my life to sail the sea ♪

♪ I never thought ♪

♪ You'd look at me ♪

♪ And that we'd be here face to face ♪

♪ And share in this sweet embrace ♪

- Wow! You're good!

- Wonderful, Noel. Casey, you take the next verse.

- ♪ This ship has carried me to you ♪

♪ And now I question ♪

♪ All I knew ♪

♪ When I look into your eyes ♪

♪ The feelings start to fly ♪

- Yes, yes! Now together on the chorus.

- ♪ [Sans harmony]: So let's show this pirate here ♪

♪ That we will never live in fear ♪

♪ Because as one we will be strong ♪

♪ And we know we both belong ♪♪

- We'll work on the harmonies, yeah?

Wendel, it's your turn!

- ♪ I've come aboard ♪ - Where's Wendel?

- ♪ To give you heck... ♪

- Wendel release the rope and the note!

- Ahhhh! Whoa! [Crashing]

♪♪♪

- You'll be happy to know, Wendel will be fine.

As soon as his broken leg heals.

- That's awful.

- Yeah. I guess the show's over then, huh?

- Oh, Noel!

The theatre is about keeping the magic alive

when it would seem all is lost.

- Well, who's gonna fill his turtleneck?

- Another promising male cast member... Derek Venturi.

- Hm? ♪♪♪

- Hey, Miss Z.

Marking hard, or hardly marking?

Ooh, somebody got a big fat F.

- Yes, somebody did.

- Did you even read Chekhov's play before writing that essay?

- No.

- Derek I know you took drama because you thought it was a bird course.

- And boy was I wrong.

- Yes, you were. It's insulting to those who have a passion for the theatre!

- Yeah, see, I get that now.

Which is why I should drop out of the musical

'cuz I don't have a passion for singing.

- Derek I've seen the way you swashbuckle around the school.

I know you can do this.

Of course I can't force you to stay.

- Sadly, no you can't. - But I can...

Force you to read Chekov's entire oeuvre

and present a written report for the drama class.

Or you can skip the report and make up for that 'F' by being in the musical.

Do we have a deal, Pirate Pete?

♪♪♪

- ♪ What's wrong Edwin? ♪

- I got an A on my poetry assignment.

- Uh, I know you don't get them often, but As are a good thing.

- What's NOT a good thing is that you told Mrs. McCabe

that I rapped while I wrote my poem.

So now she wants me to rap my poem at the next assembly!

Could it be any more humiliating?

- Just tell Mrs. McCabe you want out. - I can't!

She's so excited and she's so proud of me!

I'm trapped! So what are we gonna do?

- Who's we Eddy-V?

- Hey, you got me into this! - ♪ You clean it up ♪

- Oh! I'm sorry, Max. I was just working out some new choreography.

- Yeah, about the play. How mad would you be if I wasn't there opening night?

- Why wouldn't you be there? - See, my friend got me these tickets

for this band I really gotta see

not that I don't wanna see the musical cuz I know it's gonna be great!

- You're really not coming to your girlfriend's opening night performance?

- I'll catch the second show.

- That's not the same! Don't you wanna be there for me?

- Yeah, the next night. - Fine!

- Casey!

- Oh, you! You go over my new choreography?

Great! Let's go make some magic.

- Uh, actually, I was thinking of skipping the magic show.

And the play.

- Tell me you're not having second thoughts about being in the play again!

- More like "third" thoughts.

It's just public humiliation really isn't my thing. And your choreography is...

- Is really great! And if you want to avoid public humiliation,

we need to rehearse. So can you meet me in the caf after school?

Great! Bring your dancing shoes.

Noel, you can't dance in those.

- Darn!

And I was so looking forward to it!

Guess we'll just have to stick to singing

and do the dancing some other time.

- Okay, either you're really chicken and you don't wanna dance,

or you're really arrogant and you don't think you need to learn the moves.

Or you're an arrogant chicken! - Oh I love arrogant chicken.

With a little lemon and tomato sauce.

- You don't dance, do you? - What?

Of course I do!

Get up there! You lead, I'll follow.

♪♪♪

- ♪♪ Get up and dance ♪

♪ Like you never have before And take a chance ♪

♪ Let's do the oou-we oou-we ♪

♪ Get on the floor ♪

♪ Like you never have before ♪

♪ And take a chance Get up and dance ♪

♪ Look at me ♪

♪ Under the lights ♪

♪ I'm sparkling like a rich celebrity ♪

♪ Come feel the light ♪

♪ Come one and all ♪

♪ You've got to do more than just survive ♪

♪ Get up and dance ♪

♪ Like you never have before and take a chance ♪

♪ Oou-we Oou-we ♪

♪ Get up and dance ♪♪

- You're not the worst dancer. - Second worst.

- Pretty much, yeah.

But I could make the choreography less complicated.

- Oh really? - If you tell me why you're really in the play.

- I told you. I was dared.

- Yeah, and I buy that you auditioned on a dare but, why are you still here?

- Because I was born to dance!

Okay, fine. Ever since I started high school I've always played it safe.

So I figured that trying out for the musical might be my first bold move.

So when the guys dared me, I thought, why not?

- Well, I admire your courage.

My football player boyfriend would never be in the musical.

Or at the musical, for that matter.

And it's too bad cuz he is gonna miss the most ridiculous moment in theatre history.

- My costume?

My dancing? Our onstage kiss?

- Derek singing.

- Yeah. Definitely. - Yeah.

It's gonna be bad.

♪♪♪

You seem pretty relaxed for someone who has mangled their solo at every rehearsal.

- Can't talk, laryngitis? You can't have laryngitis! The show is tomorrow!

Huh...

Well, since you can't talk, you can listen.

See I'm really mad at Max cuz he's not coming to opening night...

"Go away Casey."

Alright, I'll go. Ooh! I'll go get my journal.

I wrote a great 45-stanza poem

about my feelings about Max and I would love to share it with you.

- Okay! I can talk!

But I can't sing. I signed up to goof off, not to make a fool of myself!

So whenever you're ready to help--

- Forget it. It serves you right for making a mockery out of the musical.

- 'Kay, then don't help me! Help make magic!

- It would take a team of magicians to get you outta this jam.

- Then think of it this way:

if I bomb on stage, then the whole musical bombs

no matter how good you are.

- Fine. You want help? Here's some advice.

- I don't need advice!

I need to learn how to carry the most ridiculous tune in music history!

- Derek, of course it's ridiculous, it's a musical!

No one bursts into song in real life.

But for 2 hours tomorrow night, you have got to buy into it,

fully and completely. There's no halfway!

- But... - [Casey repeatedly]: No. - But, no, that's...

The only way I know how to do things! - Uh uh!

- You'll never steal the precious cargo of Captain Carl!

So, avast ye, Pete, and show your pirate face!

[Seagulls]

Uh, Pete? Aren't you supposed to be shivering my timbers?

[Clearing throat]

♪♪♪ - 'Tis now, uh, my ship.

Don't give me no...

Lip?

♪♪ Avast ye, mateys ♪

♪ Start crying some tears ♪

♪ My handle is Pete ♪

♪ The mad, baddest buccaneer ♪

♪ I've been checkin' for booty from yonder and far ♪

♪ But up in this ship, yo is where you all arrrre... ♪

♪ So stop bustin' my barnacles ♪

♪ Step off and stay clear ♪

♪ Get outta my face or the plank ye be steered ♪

♪ I'll pillage and plunder ♪

♪ 'Cuz that's how I roll ♪ [Cheering]

♪ This vessel's my treasure Pirate Pete's in control ♪

♪ Your booty is mine your bling is my thing ♪

♪ So gimme your loot ♪

♪ I'm the captain and king ♪♪ [Cheering]

♪♪♪

[Applause]

- Sorry, Pete.

But this ship is for sailors and passengers only.

So I'm gonna have to ask you to walk the plank.

- You and what arrrrrmy?

♪♪♪

- Oh, Hart! I'm so proud of you!

After everyone abandoned ship, you came to my rescue.

[Seagulls]

How can I ever thank you? - With one dance at sea,

♪♪♪ under the stars.

- ♪♪ I never thought that in this place ♪

♪ We'd end up, face to face ♪

- ♪ I can't believe that this is real ♪

♪ I never thought that I would feel ♪

- ♪ I know it's true, I feel the same ♪

- ♪ Oh - oh ♪

- ♪ I know this isn't just a game ♪

- [Duet]: ♪ So let's not waste another chance ♪

♪ To share in this final dance ♪

♪ And when it's through ♪

♪ You'll look at me ♪

♪ And I'll close my eyes and hopefully ♪

♪ Some magic there will be ♪

[Applause & cheering]

- Ah, the magic of theatre.

- [Crowd]: Derek! Derek! Derek! Derek!

[Applause and cheering]

[Girls giggling] - Ladies I'd be happy to discuss the play at Wendel's cast party.

- Okay. - Might even teach you how to... - [Casey]: Unbelievable!

We were in almost every scene, sang almost every song

and Derek's the hit of the show?

- Well, despite popular opinion, I'd say the real star was you.

- He's right.

- Max! When did you get here?

- I was here the whole time. I couldn't miss your big night.

And I'm really sorry I didn't figure that out sooner,

but we football players take a lot of hits.

- Apology accepted.

Oh, and thank you so much for the flowers. They're beautiful.

- Uh, I didn't send any flowers.

♪♪♪

- See, this friend of mine got tickets for this band...

What is that line?

I don't know about it?

- ♪ They call me Eddie V! - Lizzie M is my name ♪

- ♪ We're step brother-sister rappers! - Put all others to shame ♪

- ♪ Don't play with words like we do. - You mess up all your rhymes ♪

- ♪ Rapping poems is our way. - We're ahead of our time. Now break it down! ♪

- Yeah! - Whooo!

- ♪ Don't play with words like we do. - You mess up all your rhymes ♪

- Some... Something, something.

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