Original subtitles

You realize this draft isn't

anywhere near being ready to defend?

- I thought it was pretty good progress considering.

- Bullshit!

- Excuse me?

Ben, you and I both know that's bullshit.

- I have the ideas there.

- Look, I get it.

It's a lot more fun to spin theories out loud than it is

to sit at your computer and make things make sense.

- With a little more time.

- You don't have any more time.

This is your seventh year.

Your clock has run out, man.

If you don't defend on schedule

all your coursework becomes invalid.

Now, your argument and dialectic isn't bad,

an overview of the philosophical spread

of Calvinism across Western Europe.

- I'm focusing on how the idea

of predestination shaped society.

How it affected politics, culture.

- Yeah, yeah, I get it.

Not bad.

But, you gotta stop procrastinating.

That may have gotten you through your masters,

but it won't work here.

Now, focus and get to work.

You started it!

No, you started it!

No, you started it!

No, you started it!

No, you started it.

No, you started it.

No, you started it.

No, you started it.

- Stop it.

Mohammed, be nice to your sister.

She's a girl.

- But, she started it.

- Mohammed, drink your orange juice.

- I want apple juice!

- Enough!

We ran out.

Ara, is that food almost ready?

- Almost.

- She let us have donuts last time.

- Ara!

- I didn't give them donuts.

- Myriam, you know what Allah says about lying.

I spoke to your grandmother today.

Every time I call her she's asking about you.

When are you going to call that woman?

- It's always the same conversation about great-grandkids.

I'll give her a call later.

- Oh, and Najeeb's mother called.

She's insisting that you join them for dinner this week.

- It's not a good week for that.

- When is it going to be a good week?

A good man like Najeeb isn't going to chase you forever.

Ara, you have to start taking your place in the community.

I take it you're finished for the night?

- I just started proofing.

I'd like to get a little more finished

before I have to get up tomorrow and do it all over again.

- Maybe it's time to give the dissertation

a break for the night.

Give yourself some rest.

- Mom.

- For your own sake.

Remember the scriptures says, "To the righteous soul

it will be said: O thou soul,

in complete rest and satisfaction."

- What would a righteous woman do tonight?

- Didn't you say something about your friend's art exhibit?

Why don't you take the evening off and go support her?

- Sasha wouldn't miss me.

- Would you stop it.

Go see it, if just for curiosity's sake.

- I guess I'm obsessing over this

because it's my last paper as a student.

- If you give it too much power it will control you.

Sweetheart, go to the gallery.

- Hey.

- Hey, how's the work coming?

- Slow.

- Okay, well are you going to be there all night?

- I don't know.

I may break for a few, then get back to it.

- All right, well, you are still coming

to the family dinner on Sunday, right?

- Nah, I need to skip this week.

- Please, stop being a martyr

because you could come if you wanted to.

And do you understand that you're wasting your time

on a PhD that is essentially worthless?

- I don't need this from you right now.

- You are afraid of the real world.

- What is the real world?

- Really?

Here we go again.

- No, tell me.

Accounting firms are the real world and academia isn't.

Is that right?

You're going to cure cancer with your MBA?

- You know what I think?

I think that I'm going to go out with Manny tonight.

Is that cool with you?

- What, are you asking me now?

- People change and frankly, I really don't need

any more drama in my life.

So, yes, I'm asking.

- That's the deal, right?

We can see whoever we want.

- Name, please.

- Vivian.

- Okay, you're good.

- Name, please.

- Ara Jalali.

- Sasha's friend, right?

- Yeah.

- Go ahead.

- Thanks.

- Name, please.

- Alice.

- Excuse me.

I didn't think you'd make it.

- Wow.

It all looks so beautiful.

- Thank you.

- It's amazing.

- I am so glad you are here.

Me, too.

You know, here's going

to be coming here later.

Okay, which one is it this time?

Jean-Marc, of course.

My Frenchman.

Hmm.

What about you?

What about me?

- Don't play dumb.

- There's no time.

- Why don't you make time?

You keep staring at my champagne.

You want some?

- No.

I just like the smell.

I love you, Ara.

- Excuse me.

You have a buyer.

- Excuse me.

- Okay.

- What were you thinking?

- Beg your pardon?

- When they took the photograph of you.

What were you thinking?

- Don't know.

My friend took it.

It's more of a favor to her.

- Hmm.

You didn't answer the question though.

- The answer is nothing.

It was a windy day, kind of chilly.

I was just looking up at the clouds.

- That's impossible.

No one really thinks about nothing.

- Excuse me?

- Maybe you were thinking about how cold it was outside,

or about how you want this to turn out for your friend.

- It's just a turn of phrase.

- Why not say, "my mind was wandering",

or "nothing in particular"?

Saying just "nothing" is inaccurate.

- You take things pretty literally.

I go to school with you.

We're in the same department.

Ben Johnson.

- Oh.

- It's an amazing photograph.

Everyone's really raving about your work.

You about to defend?

Fourth year in?

- Is it every really ready?

What about you?

- I am woefully behind actually.

That was helpful.

- What?

- What we did earlier.

Back and forth about nothingness.

It was helpful.

Thank you.

Do you have five minutes actually?

Just to bounce some ideas off of you.

If that's cool?

- Okay.

- Yeah?

- Sure.

- I'm writing about the concept of fate

and John Calvin's teachings on predestination.

How they effected western philosophy.

- So where's your trouble?

- I compiled this great reading list,

I did all this research,

and then my first draft just sucked.

- You didn't send any segments to your adviser?

- Something like that.

I don't know, I think philosophy is more about

the talking, and flushing out of truths.

- Sounds like maybe you procrastinate.

- How do you know its procrastination?

- You're in your last stage of a PhD program.

You must have written papers in your masters

that were good enough to get you here, right?

- Right.

- So, you've probably had this habit for awhile.

- What about yours?

- My dissertation?

- Yeah.

- It's about Cameroonian Philosophy, pre-colonization.

How their ideas might have been different

without European intrusion.

It's like trying to un-graft a vine from a tree.

- How would it have looked, you think?

Better?

- That's subjective.

I believe thought develops best out of captivity,

so in that respect, yeah, better.

What about you and Calvin?

- Would it have been better had he not come along?

- Or if his teachings never took off.

- I don't know.

I never really weighed in on that specific topic.

- You don't have an opinion on how a major

movement like that affected your religion?

- I'm agnostic.

I don't have a religion.

- Ah.

- Well, that can't be a surprise.

Most of the department's that way.

- Not everyone.

- Sorry.

Um, I'm not religious, but I think the reformation

was more about freedom from Rome and the Pope.

I mean, King Henry, come on.

That had nothing to do with God, he just wanted a divorce.

I mean, maybe separation from the papacy was a good thing.

Who wants to be Catholic, right?

- Um, I'd better get going.

It was nice running into you.

- Yeah, you, too.

Um, do you want to maybe meet up again?

Like, can I get your number?

- Uh, sure.

Okay, um, here.

Let me have yours.

- Well, I'll text it to you.

Nice try.

Just put it in here.

- Here you go.

- Thanks.

- It was good running into you.

- You, too.

Ara, don't forget to schedule dinner with

Najeeb's parents this week.

I know you hear me!

- My faith in Allah has been a source

of strength and peace for me.

It feels like a lifeline really.

Something that saves me from drowning when I'm at my lowest.

That's why staying pure before Allah is so important.

We're created to crave God, to want Allah,

but its the human challenge to make our bodies

and our minds sync up with Allah.

Last Friday we talked about how The Holy Prophet,

sallallaho alaihi wasallam said,

"The best treasure is an obedient wife

"having a good disposition so that her husband

"is pleased to see her and when the husband

"is not home, she protects her chastity."

But, at the same time I feel like God wants us to explore

the world that He gave us.

I think that's a big part of our relationship with Him, too.

Hello?

- Dr. Jalali, I presume?

- Not yet, Mom.

- Can you stop by the Mosque and get the tablecloth

that I loaned to Najeeb's mom?

- Okay.

- Why don't you have dinner with them this week?

- Mom.

Uh, Mom, I'll think about it.

I have to go.

Love you.

Bye.

- Here you go.

- Thanks.

- You're welcome.

- So, did you make any progress today?

- Yeah, I finally started my second draft last night.

- Wait.

You're just now writing your second draft?

- I know.

I'll make it.

- You're crazy.

- You'd be proud.

I spent all morning writing.

I got through 10 pages.

- Out of what 150?

You should be chained to your desk.

- Nah, I work better under pressure.

- Why not set an appointment to write everyday?

Set an alarm if you have to.

- What gave you the inspiration for your topic?

- My experiences in Cameroon.

I would always hear my grandmother talk about

the cycle of the human soul.

It wasn't until I was in undergrad that I realized

that that's how my people preserved their philosophies.

A lot of our ideas survived.

Even though the country's been Chrisianized,

people still practice some form of ancestor worship.

- What do they say about the cycle of the soul?

- Well, my tribe believes that it's synced

with the world around us, particularly the ocean.

And that the spirit of our ancestors live in the sea.

The good ones act as an intermediary between us and God.

- Is that what you believe?

- Well, I believe that when you die,

your soul enters an in-between stage.

The souls of good people are in a state of paradise

awaiting the Last Day.

- What about the bad people?

- For them it's not so nice.

- Hmm.

Are there many other Muslims in Cameroon?

- Some.

I actually grew up Christian, and then my mom got married

to my step-dad, who's Muslim, and then we converted.

He was an American visiting Africa.

- He was a missionary?

- No, he was a lawyer.

- But, he converted you guys though.

- Well, he wasn't an official missionary.

- Did you ever know your biological dad?

- No, he died when I was a baby.

My step-dad died a few years ago.

- I'm sorry.

- Time to get back to work.

- Come on, that was like two minutes.

- That's how it should be.

Go write.

I don't want you failing to be on my conscience.

- Meet me again tomorrow?

- Um, sure.

If I have time.

- Okay, bye.

- Bye.

- Oh, you look tired.

Sit down, have some tea.

- Najeeb and his father came by today.

Mr. Seyed just made partner and Najeeb

is going to be an associate at the same firm

when he's passed the bar.

- Nice.

- You know what they came by to talk about, right?

- I thought if I played dumb I could avoid the subject.

- Najeeb is a hot commodity, and he's not going

to be on the market for long.

- Mom.

- You don't even act interested in men.

- That's because it's rare to find one who's interesting.

- You mean all these years in college

you haven't been interested in anyone?

- So?

- You do like men, don't you?

- Yes!

- All I'm saying is that you could give him a chance.

Its time.

- When I'm done with my dissertation I'll deal with it.

- You know, Ara, maybe that's your problem.

You look at love as something to be dealt with.

- Tomorrow, I want us to stay at my place.

- Why?

- Because, it's fucking clean!

I mean, your parents, they hooked you up with this place.

The least that you could do is actually keep it clean.

- I'll clean when I'm more ahead with this.

- Yeah, well,

I think that you have done

enough work for today.

- I need to finish this, okay?

- Seriously?

I mean, God forbid that we actually take our clothes off

and touch each other.

I'm going to Manny's.

French roast with half and half, right?

- Thanks.

- Welcome.

- Do you have a table inside?

- You know, actually, I've been sitting all day long.

Do you want to maybe take a walk?

- Sure.

So, you never told me about your family.

What would you like to know?

Where are you from?

I was born in Texas, but we moved to Seattle

when my mom got out of the Air Force.

So, it was just you and your mom?

- My step-mom, too.

Oh.

- She's a lesbian.

- Yeah, I got that.

So, you never knew your Dad?

- Yeah, he was a bad guy.

Roughed us up a bunch.

One night he beat us up both pretty bad.

She grabbed me and left.

- I'm so sorry.

You don't have to be.

Shit happens, you know?

I don't think stuff like that just happens.

- I can talk about it now.

Seems like a bad dream I used to have when I was a kid.

- Is that when you lost your faith?

- In what?

God?

I don't recall ever having any.

- Your parents weren't Christian?

- No, both atheists, grandparents, too.

I guess you could say like a third generation skeptic.

- So you've always doubted?

- I've always maintained that anything people say

that they know about God, is uncertain.

- So, you're first generation agnostic

because your parents were atheist.

- No, they felt same way.

- Right, but you just said that they were atheists.

Atheists aren't unsure.

They're certain that there is no God.

- There are levels of atheism.

- Which one are you?

- Atheist-lite.

Was it weird when your mom came out?

- It was odd at first, but she was so much more happy

I didn't care and I love my step-mom, too.

- I wonder if you would have felt the same way in Texas.

- Why would that have mattered?

- Places can affect people's attitudes.

- I think if you're strong enough you can keep stuff out.

Like water-resistant wood.

When you go back to Cameroon does it affect your attitude?

- Of course.

My grandma's crazy.

She's not religious, but somehow

our converting to Islam traumatized her.

- You ever feel oppressed by your religion?

Like having to wear the headscarf?

- Its called a hijab and I wear it because I want to.

My grandma bugs me about it, too.

- Does it make you feel angry?

- No, just alienated.

I don't fit in back home

and I don't quite fit in here either.

Makes me wish there was an in-between place.

- Like somewhere you can just be without offending anyone?

- Yeah.

Well, it's time to get back to work.

- Ara Jalali?

- Yeah.

God, she's Sasha's friend.

So, how did you two meet?

- I've known her for awhile, actually.

We're in the same department.

Met her in an art gallery and we started talking.

You?

- Uh,

she's Sasha's good friend.

So, um,

are you guys going to start seeing each other more often?

- No.

- Well,

I'm gonna go spend the night

at Manny's house tomorrow night.

- Okay, have fun.

That's a good one.

- Come on Ara, you should have got that.

I'm out of practice.

- You used to be really good, right?

- Good enough to not be embarrassing.

- You ever miss it?

- I miss all my free time.

- I play in a league.

It helps me blow off steam.

Wanna come watch me sometime?

Maybe we'll grab some food after?

I.

- Woo!

Hi, Manny.

Hey, baby.

- I was up late writing last night

and it all of a sudden came to me.

I'm gonna throw in a section of Spinoza's theory.

- You added a section about Rationalistic Pantheism?

- Mm-Hmm.

- That has nothing to do with your topic.

- It has everything to do with it.

I'm gonna show that Calvin paved the way

for other thinkers like Spinoza.

So, in a way Calvinism helped move along the Renaissance.

- You have to show evidence.

Are you sure you're not just a Rationalistic Pantheist

and this isn't your way of infusing

your personal beliefs into your argument?

- I'm agnostic.

I don't think it's possible to know if any deity exists.

Not even Spinoza's.

- Maybe some people can.

- There's no certainty, though.

Certainty is gravity, cell division, death.

- Okay, but wouldn't you say that some people innately

have a better understanding of physics than others?

I mean, maybe the same is true for supernatural things.

Maybe there are physical ways to study metaphysics

that we just don't know about.

- Based on what people know, right here and now,

there's no certainty.

- Well, Spinoza would argue

that the universe is deterministic.

Everything that has happened, or will happen,

could not have unfolded in any other way.

And you're welcome.

- Why?

- Spinoza's deterministic theory is a tie-in

to Calvin's predestination.

- Would you mind taking a look at some of my writing?

- Sure.

I'm curious at this point.

Not bad.

Your prose and ideas are great.

- Thanks.

- Ever heard of spell check?

I hate spell check.

- That being the hardest part about writing a paper.

I got a call from my friend Sasha the other day.

She said you were seeing one of her friends.

Gabrielle?

- Yeah.

Gab mentioned meeting you once or twice.

- Is it weird for her that we're hanging out?

- No.

Why would that be weird?

- Seems like she'd be jealous.

- Nah, we have an open relationship.

- What?

- We both see other people.

She has another guy named Manny.

I'm cool with it.

- And how many women are you seeing?

- So far, just her.

I'm pickier than she is.

- You're all crazy.

- Why?

- Don't you find that the least bit abnormal?

No, we don't.

- You don't want to get married?

- No.

Not right now, no.

She feels the same way.

I mean, if it changes, it changes.

- Only in grad-school.

- You're telling me that you've never had a boyfriend

who you didn't want to spend the rest of your life with?

- I haven't really dated any.

- That's a little abnormal.

Jerk.

When everyone started dating in high school

none of the boys seemed interested in me.

So, by the time we got into college, I was too busy.

- Did you make yourself too busy?

- Well, my parents wouldn't allow it,

and I wasn't ready for marriage yet,

so I put all that on the shelf.

- You couldn't date until you were ready to get married?

- No.

Plus, I was coping out.

- How so?

- Well, I guess I used my beliefs as a way

of avoiding all the awkwardness.

It was easier to hide behind them.

Well, I've been hiding a bit myself lately.

- You?

From what?

- I don't know, life?

It's my seventh year in.

I could have defended my fifth year if I had won.

- Why didn't you?

- I've been a student all my life.

I don't know what I'd do with myself.

Are you nosing through my mp3 list?

- Maybe.

- I don't think we're at the music sharing stage

in our relationship, yet.

See anything you like?

- Um, yeah.

I used to catch my mom listening to music like this

when she thought no one was watching.

- Shit.

Shit, I'm sorry.

It goes off each day to remind me to write.

- You listened.

Has it helped?

- Yeah, yeah.

I feel like I'm caught up.

- Maybe I can use my super powers to help you

with other problems in your life.

- Oh, you have super powers, huh?

- Yes.

What were you going to write about?

- Spinoza and the ripples in the universe.

About how everything that is, or will be,

are like ripples in a pond.

All outside our control and nothing can change them.

- What about Calvin?

- I was going to use the tie-in that you gave me.

About how Calvin's predestination

is a Christian version of Spinoza's theory.

- Do you believe that?

- That Spinoza copied Calvin?

- No.

In their theories.

- I believe that what we do causes things to happen.

And that the consequences, they're unavoidable sometimes,

but it's only because of the choices.

- So, cause and consequence.

- Yeah.

- You don't believe in destiny then?

- No.

- Okay, well if reality is all action and reaction,

then could the thing that started it all be destiny?

- So, you're saying that whatever caused

the ripples in the universe, that's destiny?

- Maybe.

In Islam we call it Qadar.

- Qadar?

- Yeah, it's the Arabic word for destiny.

We believe that everything that has happened,

or will happen, is known by Allah.

- So, everything is determined by God then?

- No, its still cause and consequence,

it's just that Allah sees everything.

What?

- Nothing.

It's just you.

Just you.

Where's your silverware?

- Drawer, to the left.

Mind if we eat standing up?

- Okay.

- At home we have to sit until everyone's done.

You ever get tired of the lifestyle?

Yes and no.

- Which parts?

Like having to save yourself for marriage?

- No, but when everyone else is doing it,

it's like you're missing out on something.

- You think what we did the other day is a sin?

- Yeah.

- Can you let it be on me?

- Doesn't work that way.

I have to take care of it.

- Go to confession?

- You've got your religions mixed up.

Sorry.

- Our repentance is called tawba

and you do it only to Allah.

- All that because we made out?

- Is that so hard to believe?

- Yeah.

A little bit, yeah.

- You've never repented over anything you did?

- Not anything like that, no.

It sounds horrible to me.

Having to tell someone you're sorry all the time.

Like your constantly going to the spiritual

principal's office or something.

- You're thinking about it the wrong way.

Its reconciliation to God.

You repent to get closer to God.

- What else do you ask God for?

- All kinds of things.

- Yeah, like what?

- I ask Him to help people.

I also pray for my step-dad.

- You said he was passed away, right?

- Yeah, its a dua prayer.

You say it for the dead.

- What do you ask God to do for the dead?

- I ask him to make them among the guided ones

and fill their graves with light.

You ever pray before?

Yeah.

Once when I was a little boy, I saw bunch of Mormons

praying in a restaurant, then I prayed

and asked God for a million bucks.

He didn't give it to me.

It didn't work.

- I'm going to pray say a prayer for you.

- Come on, get out.

- I'm going to.

- No, you don't have to.

- What would you pray for?

- My Mom's sick.

- What's her name?

Andrea.

- Andrea.

Allah, you are ever merciful and kind.

Great healer, please have mercy on Andrea

and cure her from her illness.

- Hey Ben, what are you making?

Oh.

Hi, Ara.

How are you?

- I'm good.

- So,

making pasta.

Good thinking, Ben.

Hmm.

No wine?

Come on.

You're being a bad host, Ben.

- She doesn't drink, Gab.

- Really?

You're missing out.

I'm gonna have some, though.

So, tell me.

What else can't you all have?

- A few things.

Actually, I have to go.

Lots of meetings tomorrow.

- Hey, hey, I'll walk you out.

- No, it's fine.

Well, that was weird.

Be careful with her.

- Oh my god, you're kidding?

- I swear I'm not.

- My little girl's all grown up.

- Hardly.

- You kept everything intact, right?

- Wow.

- I just wanna make sure you're all locked up down there.

But, seriously though, how do you feel?

- I can't shake the feeling that I'm screwing everything up.

- Screwing what up?

- My life, family, God.

- Sometimes you have to do what's right for you.

- Come in.

- Oh, hi, guys.

- It's been awhile.

- Hi, Ara.

- Hi.

- I actually wanted to talk with you a moment.

- Okay.

- Well, unless you guys are in the middle of something.

- No, it's fine.

- I'll leave you girls to talk.

- Look,

I know the whole thing with you and Ben.

I just wanted to let you know I'm cool with it.

- So, you both have other people?

Well, I don't believe

that you ever truly have somebody.

I think we're more like jellyfish.

They don't really ever hold onto their mates.

They just kind of float around touching each other.

- Is that what you believe?

- It's what I think is true.

And I like you.

And just because you're connecting with Ben,

doesn't mean that there should be any

awkwardness between us.

- Mind if I have a beer?

- Sure, go ahead.

- What does it taste like?

- It has the bite like a soda,

but there's no sweetness to it.

So, bitter and sharp.

- That doesn't sound very good.

- Want a sip?

- Okay.

That's gross!

- Eileen, tell your daughter I said thank you

for watching the kids.

- She was glad to do it.

How long before Ara finishes her degree?

- This semester, thank Allah.

- Is that Ara?

- You need your eyes checked.

Ara's a good two inches shorter than her.

- You okay?

- It's just that all my life I've been taught

never to this before marriage.

- Is that what you want?

Hey, hey.

We don't have to do anything

that you don't want to do, okay?

I think people should be able to explore

this kind of stuff when they're ready.

If you're not, that's okay.

That's okay.

Hey.

- I can't stay here.

I just need my things.

So, what?

You're not gonna give us a chance?

- There is no us.

Hi, Mom.

- Hi.

- Are you okay?

- I'm just a little tired.

Did you have a good time last night?

- It was all right.

- Hmm.

- Allah, forgive me.

Allah, forgive me.

Allah, forgive me.

Hey.

Can we talk for a minute?

- Yeah, come.

- I owe you an apology for the other night.

- I just want to know what I did

to make you run out of there like that.

- No, it has nothing to do with you, I swear.

I know you don't get it, but I can't live like this.

You're a great guy and it wasn't fair for me

to make you think that I could.

I'm sorry.

- Well, apology accepted, I guess.

- You sure?

- Yeah, I'm fine.

I was worried about you.

- I'll be okay.

- Tawba?

- Tawba.

- Okay.

- Well, I have to go.

- Okay.

- Okay.

Bye.

Did you have a bad weekend or something?

- No, I was just thinking about us and I reconsidered.

- Okay.

- I was torn between what I wanted and God.

I didn't think I could have both.

- But, you're not torn anymore?

- I think...

I have hope that God won't

cast me out for being with someone.

- What if there wasn't a god and you spent

your entire life doing things you didn't have to do

to impress an imaginary friend?

- You really believe God is imaginary?

- Most intellectuals in society think so.

- There are other intellectuals in the world

besides the ones in the US and the UK.

If you interview professors in India

they'd give you very different answers.

- That doesn't mean they're right.

- Look at the cognitive difference between us and insects.

You have creatures whose memory lasts a few seconds

and then there's humanity that

can decipher how stars function.

- So?

- So, if we're that much greater than creatures

we can observe, doesn't it stand to reason

that there are creatures higher than us?

- Sure.

Worthy of our worship?

Not so much.

- So arrogant.

- Why, because I don't want to pay senseless homage

to something that could be as made-up as Santa Clause?

- No, because you think there's a possibly

that a God exists, but you don't think it's worth our time.

- I was reading the other day how a group of scientists

figured out how to create matter out of light.

Why isn't that praiseworthy?

Why can't humanity focus on our own accomplishments?

- The atheist is most happy when he gets to play god.

- All cultures invent these tall tales,

or exaggerate things, to give themselves significance.

Like what you were telling me about your tribe

submersing themselves in the ocean

so they can talk to ghosts.

You actually believe that?

- What if I did?

The West declared the City of Troy was a myth

until someone found it and then they had to eat their words.

The earth was flat until the West decided it was round.

Before they were forcing us to be Christians,

now they want us to be agnostic.

God only exists when you say He does, right?

Those ideas and stories you're mocking

are the dignity of a lot of people.

- I think it's the kind of thing

you make up when you have none.

- This was a mistake.

Thanks for clearing it up for me.

- So, are you going to tell me what's wrong?

Ara, please.

Sweetheart, tell me.

I'm here for you.

I know what you're going through.

I thought I was in love with a man I met at university, too.

- Before you met my father?

- Yes.

It's hard when you meet folks in a certain way

at a certain time.

It's like they were tailored just for you.

- What was he like?

- Oh, you know, nice, and fun.

For the first time I felt free, like I had my own life

and I could do whatever I wanted.

Why didn't it last?

- I realized he wasn't really serious about life.

He was more interested in going to one party after another

than settling down and having a family.

His lifestyle was unstable.

Just too crazy for me.

When I came to my senses, I broke off with him,

and soon after that, I met your father,

and he was the right man for me.

- Did you ever hear about these couples

in open relationships?

- Of course, it happens back home all the time.

Some of the women, they just put up with.

Ara, are you?

Oh, why would you be in that kind of relationship, huh?

- He has this woman he's been seeing since before we met.

- Ara, you know that isn't right.

I can see how unhappy you are about it.

Ara, this is going to make you an outcast in our community.

You know that, right?

The men in this country, they will not

understand something like that.

They'll judge you.

- I just don't know how I got wrapped up in it.

- You can unwrap yourself.

Sweetheart, you deserve better.

When all this fire and passion dies away, and it will,

you'll only find true freedom and peace in Allah.

- Come in.

- You're Ben Johnson?

- Yeah.

You must be Ara's mom?

- No, sir.

I do not wish to shake your hand.

- I beg your pardon?

- You have been defiling my daughter

and you should make this right.

- I don't know what you're talking about.

- You have been with her.

She's never been with a man before.

You understand?

You're ruining her for her husband.

My daughter is a good woman and she deserves to be with

someone who's going to treat her with respect.

- I don't think there's anything wrong with what we did.

- If you want what's best for her, leave her alone,

or you have to marry her.

And women in Islam cannot marry outside it.

So, are you going to convert and then break up

with that other friend of yours?

Do you see yourself married to Ara?

You heard what I asked you.

You understand?

You're making her an outcast

in the community if this continues.

She'll have trouble finding a good husband, and for what?

So you can feel like a big man?

If you don't have honorable intentions for her,

then leave her alone and let someone

who deserves her step up.

- Hey.

I hate to just drop in on you like this.

It's okay.

- Look, I know you're busy,

but have you seen Gabrielle today?

- No, it's been a couple of days.

- Not a word?

- No.

She does this all the time.

She's probably with her folks.

- She hasn't been returning my calls and I just got worried.

Anyways, I just wanted to make sure she's all right.

- I'm sure she's okay.

Is there something else on your mind, man?

- Do you love her?

- I don't know.

- Right, that's a no.

- What is love?

- Jesus, I forgot I'm talking to damn philosopher.

- I'm not being facetious.

How do you know you're in love with someone?

- I can't stop thinking about her.

I go crazy when she's gone, I go crazy when she's over here.

I have never felt like this with another woman.

- Yeah?

- When we're together it just feels,

it feels dangerous and right.

You feel the same way?

- No.

With Gabrielle, it's comfortable and easy.

But no,

the planets don't align.

- What about with the other woman you're seeing?

- In a weird way, yeah.

- There's your answer, man.

Do the right thing.

Make us all happy.

I think she should move in with me.

- Hey, I am so sorry I was such an ass.

Can you forgive me, please?

I'm sorry.

Sorry.

- You're better than this.

You know that.

- Mom, I just need some time alone with him

to figure some things out.

- Have you thought about the example

you're setting for Mohammed and Myriam?

- Did you tell them?

- No.

Are you going to marry this man?

Have children with him?

- Mom, I love you, but I have to go.

- How are you feeling after today?

- Good.

- That's good.

- Are you still talking to Gabrielle?

- No.

- Did you love her?

- There were times when I thought I did.

Being with her was comforting, easy.

But, we, uh,

we didn't fit in a lot of ways,

and I felt guilty for not making it fit.

Was afraid of being alone, I guess.

- Why?

- Ever since I moved out of my Mom's house,

I always have to have a woman around me.

It's ironic, since I was afraid of committing myself.

It felt like the beginning of death.

Thought love would step in and solve everything,

but what is love?

You believe God hears all your prayers?

- Of course.

Hmm.

- You think its crazy, I know.

- Nah, actually I'm a little jealous.

- Why would that make you jealous?

- Because its something I can't experience.

I need evidence for everything.

The fact that you're so sure without it, well,

makes me a little jealous.

- You've never thought there might be a God?

I thought there could be one once.

- When?

- This one time I was thinking about

the origins of everything, and the universe.

- What do you think about the soul?

- I don't know.

Define it and I will tell you what I think about it.

- Its your immaterial essence.

The youness of you.

- Like a part of you that's separate from your body?

Yeah.

- Sounds like a nice idea.

Makes me wish I had one.

- You have a soul, silly.

- I'm Nosferatu.

- Stop it.

- I'm Nosferatu.

I'm gonna have some friends over tomorrow.

Is that okay?

- Okay.

- You sure?

- Yeah, I'm fine.

They want to meet you.

Yo, shot.

- All right, all right, all right.

Okay, um, black horsey.

- Checkmate.

That's on you.

- Fuck you, asshole.

Huh?

I yield.

- No, it's not.

- Are you even listening?

- No, listen to me.

What I'm telling you, it's complete and utter bullshit.

- No, it's not.

- You're telling me with a straight face

that the sexual revolution didn't liberate women?

- What I'm saying is that women, as a group,

stopped paying attention to who they gave it up to.

That's caused us to be objectified more, that's all.

Its true.

We usually don't say no if its offered.

- But, why shouldn't a woman fuck whoever she wants to fuck?

- Because we're the ones who get stuck with the kids

when the asshole runs.

Like you.

You wouldn't want a baby with some random dude, would you?

Morning.

Sorry to interrupt.

- That's okay.

- You all done?

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

Every morning, right?

- Yeah.

Did you have fun last night?

- Yeah, it wasn't bad.

It was kind of awkward for you.

Sorry.

- A little bit.

- Yeah.

My friends drink a lot, sorry.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

- The girls were pretty funny.

They were talking about what kind of man

they'd want to have kids with.

- God.

- You ever want kids?

- Uh, one day, yeah.

Think it'd be a nightmare now though, jeez.

- Why would it be a nightmare?

- Take over your life.

Tie you down to some screaming spawn.

- Well, You were a screaming spawn once, too, you know?

- Yeah.

Drove my dad nuts.

Think it's partly why he was such a psycho.

One half PTSD and the other half unwanted children.

You know he won all these medals in the Air Force

for leadership, so it couldn't have been the stress.

He used to throw glasses at my head.

Crazy shit.

I honestly think that if he would have had just the room

to be himself, he could have been a better man.

- You busy today?

I've got a meeting with my adviser.

You?

- I was going to work on my dissertation.

- Okay.

I'm going to be late.

- Okay.

Don't clean, okay?

- Okay.

- Ara, can we talk to you?

This isn't the answer.

I love you.

Allah loves you.

- Mom.

- Is this what you want?

Are you really happy like this?

- Mom, you know I love you.

This is just something I need to figure out on my own.

- I will wait on you forever.

Do the right thing, Ara.

- Wow.

I don't know how you did it, but this looks ready to defend.

- Not bad, huh?

- It's good.

Thoughtful, well-written.

What happened?

I'm serious.

This is a world away from your last draft.

- Yeah, I guess it is.

- Ergo my question, what happened?

Do the right thing, Ara.

- Ara.

Hi.

Hey.

- So, how did your meeting go?

- Great.

All I have to do is defend now.

- Hmm.

Well, I have some good news.

I was accepted into Georgetown law.

- Wow.

Congrats.

Thank you.

It was the first school that I applied to.

- So, you'll be moving there after the summer?

- Right after graduation, actually.

- You didn't even tell me you were applying.

- Yeah, well, I'm probably going to be heading there in May

because I want to get the lay of the land

before the fall semester starts.

And, um, well,

I wanted to see if you would come with me.

I'm pregnant.

- Are you sure?

- Yep.

I missed my period and I went to the doctor

and I got the call today.

I'm keeping the baby.

- I'm not saying this to be an ass,

but are you sure it's mine?

- Yes, I'm sure it's yours.

You are the only one I have had unprotected sex with.

You know, I just assumed that you would

want to be involved in the life of your child.

- No, I mean, you're right.

I'm just processing this.

Brr, it's getting chilly.

Should have brought a jacket today.

Oh, it's Ben.

Hi, Ben.

What's going on, stranger?

I miss talking to you.

- Tell Ben I love him.

- Lana says hi and that she loves you.

- I missed you all.

Sorry, I've been busy getting my dissertation together.

How's it coming?

- It's ready to go.

- Are you all right, Benny?

You're voice sounds strange.

- I haven't been too careful here lately.

Gabrielle's pregnant.

- Oh, wow.

- Crazy, huh?

How do you feel about this?

- Shaken up.

She's going to Georgetown in the fall

and she wants me to come with her.

- And you don't want to?

- No.

There's someone else.

Someone else?

Benny, this is soap opera stuff, hon.

- We have an open relationship.

I'm an idiot for getting myself into this.

Gabrielle, she and I were just good

for the time being, you know?

Then, I met this other girl who I have a real

connection with, and I just think I ruined it.

Just like that.

- Ben, Ben, Benjamin.

You couldn't be like that man if you tried.

Do you want to live the rest of your life with Gabrielle?

- No.

No.

- Well, could you be a good father

if you weren't living with her?

- Yeah.

- Well, it sounds to me like you've

answered your own question.

Hey.

- Hey.

How'd your day go?

- Not bad.

I didn't mean for you to clean all this.

- It's okay.

- I said I'd clean.

- It's fine.

- You're too good to me.

You shouldn't have to take care of my mess.

- I work better when things are clean.

You hungry?

- Yeah, food sounds good.

There's something I've got to tell you.

- Something wrong?

- Yeah.

I had a weird day today.

I got some news.

- What is it?

- I don't know how to tell you this.

What?

- Gabrielle's pregnant.

I just found out today.

Listen, I'm going to tell her that even with the baby,

I'm still going to be with you.

Ara.

Can you listen?

Fuck.

I didn't do this on purpose.

Can you give me the dignity of listening to me for a second?

I need you to listen to me.

- It's very early in your first trimester,

so you have lots of options.

I have an opening as early as next Wednesday.

- Will it hurt?

- Some women have pain like cramps during the procedure,

but it's very safe.

But, you don't have to make a decision today.

- Hi.

I talked to your mom.

She's worried about you.

- I figured as much.

I've been worried about you, too.

There anything I can do?

- I don't think anyone can help me now.

- Ara, my father and I have been pushy.

I'm sorry for that.

Look, I don't care what's happened.

I want to help you, if you'll let me.

- Professors, thank you for your time here today.

My dissertation focuses on the tenants of Calvinism

and how that philosophy's spread across Western Europe.

It affected the politics, and culture.

- And contrary to statistics, Cameroonian philosophies

still thrive within Christianity much like

the Cult of Isis survives within Roman Catholicism

as the veneration of Mary.

That was brilliant, Ara.

- Thank you.

Congratulations on a remarkable defense

and on your engagement.

- Thank you.

So, will you be Dr. Jalali?

- No, I'm choosing to take my husband's name.

- Just have a seat over there.

How'd it go in there?

- I did okay.

You?

- Pretty sure I passed.

- You think so?

- If I would have done this a month ago

I would have said no.

You?

- I passed, I think.

- I heard you got engaged.

- Yeah.

- Congrats.

- Thanks.

What are you going to do after this?

- Move to DC to be near Gabrielle.

I got a teaching fellowship there.

I hope you two are happy.

Ben, Ara.

- Listen, I just want to say.

- No, Ben.

Not here.

They're ready for you, Ben.

What were you going to write about?

Spinoza and the ripples in the universe.

About how everything that is, or will be,

are like ripples in a pond.

All outside our control and nothing can change them.

Do you believe that?