Original subtitles

Our time has come.

- You want me to get rid of Nicu ? - I want you to kill Nicu.

Previously, on UMBRE...

Kid, you're too good to be frothing at the mouth in a shitty club.

The Captain asked me to...

I didn't kill you, man.

I'll tell the world about you and the Captain and all you assholes.

Paganel is not a problem. I'll vouch for him.

We'll cover the damage. Please, don't prosecute him.

We're here for Mrs. Gina and especially for Mr. Relu. Relu Oncescu.

This oxygen you're breathing is paid for with my money.

Happy birthday, daddy !

Knock-knock !

Good day, sir.

I've no blood left to give you.

Come on, man, what the hell ? Do I look like a leech ?

You're not a doctor, then ?

- I am. - Hold on, there...

Sort of.

A hobbyist.

I enjoy studying the anatomy of the human body

from all possible angles.

If you're not a doctor, what do you want ? Who are you ?

That's a fundamental philosophical question, isn't it ?

Who am I ?

You're a parrot.

You're something else, pops.

Nico told me you're a hoot, but, wow, you're next-level.

Oh.

So you know Nicoleta.

Better than I'd ever hoped to.

But not as well as I'd want to.

If you're friends with Nico, you're probably not the brightest bulb.

Come on, dad-in-law...

Why so quick to think bad of me ?

Give me a chance, get to know me.

I'm a real keeper.

Look, how about a game of Go Fish ?

Or rummy ? Or Canasta ?

- Wanna talk about the King ? - Who're you calling dad-in-law, putz ?

Daddy-o...

Can I call you "daddy-o", then ?

Here it is: when the planets align...

...and Cupid pricks you...

...not even a charming geezer like you can get you out of it.

His hands are tied.

I can kick you the fuck out ! Go on, out !

- Get out ! - Theoretically, you can.

In practice...

Yeah. I can't even wipe my own ass anymore.

So, you're right on time.

I appreciate the offer, but I'll pass.

Then, you're useless to me.

But maybe you're of use to me.

Pops...

Do you do crossword puzzles ?

What are you rambling about, you namby-pamby ?

What bedlam let you go, you fruitcake ?

- Get out, man ! - Chill, pops.

You know you do crossword puzzles. All geezers do.

You know that feeling when you've got all the words, but one ?

And, no matter how hard you try, you can't crack it.

That's how I see Nicoleta.

How about...

W-H-O-R-E ?

- Did you try that ? - That's nasty.

That's nasty.

Here's the deal, pops. Nico and I - we're doing important work.

I won't bore you with the details.

But, you know Nico.

Slippery. One minute she's charming the pants off you,

the next, she'll go with the truth.

You know her better than anyone. Tell me how to get in with her.

How to read her.

Look, I even brought you a gift, to win you over.

- Oranges. - What is it with people and oranges ?

Oranges upset my stomach. What the hell ?!

I know they do.

I thought so.

What could Nicoleta see in you ?

I see it now.

You're both a couple of jerks.

- Listen here. - Jerks.

You're trying my patience.

I didn't come to ask, I came to get answers.

Look at you, getting all ballsy.

Hey...

Try as you might,

you're still a twerp compared to...

And remember...

a woman never forgets the first man who bent her over.

And then she measures everyone against him.

The only one who didn't pay for it.

Wanna know how to get in with Nico ?

From behind.

- Let me help you out. - What...

Hey...

- You... you... idiot ! - Shhh !

- Nurse ! Help ! - Shhh !

- Help me, he's gonna kill me ! - Shut up.

- Get off ! - Shut up, shut it !

- Get out, leave me alone ! - Shut up !

Help ! Motherfucker - go fuck...

Get off me ! Help ! He's gonna kill me !

Nurse ! Nurse ! Help me !

You fucker ! Hey !

- Hey ! - How's it feel getting fucked back ?

That's it. That's it. Give your lungs a rest...

Let go... That's it. Go... Rest...

See the light ? Go towards the light !

Go towards the light.

Tanase, come out. Outside, now !

- Have you lost your mind ? - What did I do ?

I told you to stop her if she went to the cops.

- And I did, man. - With your words, Tanase, your words.

- Not your fists ! - You weren't there to see her.

My guy could barely talk her down. She's insane.

She's gonna sell us all out.

What happened to you, Tanase ?

You used to be a cop who took the odd bribe.

But you were still human. When did you turn into a savage ?

You're lecturing me ? Someone like you, who does what you do ?

- Go home. - What do I do about her ?

She saw my face when she came to.

That's what you're worried about ? Mariana seeing your face ?

Better worry when I see your face next, you hear ?

- Go home and keep your mouth shut. - Are you mad ?!

She wants to rat us all out and I should keep my mouth shut ?

Let some stupid bitch decide our fates ?

If the Captain says to leave her be, I'll leave her be. Otherwise...

You forget about Mariana right now.

And then maybe, I forget about you and Pop Puiu.

Go home.

Oh, man...

Jesus !

I had food waiting for you.

I saw that. Sorry.

Dinner, and then breakfast too.

Oh, now I get why both pasta and omelette.

- The combo seemed a little weird. - That's why.

Omelette for dinner and pasta for breakfast.

No... The other way around.

Sorry, sorry, sorry...

And I woke up at 5, didn't get to clear the table

from last night, 'cause you said you'd be coming.

- But I fell asleep. - No sweat. Hang on.

- What are you doing? Let's go to bed. - But you'll get hungry in your sleep.

We'll just grab a quick bite now and go to bed after. OK ?

God, where do you get your energy ?

The lads at the bar made me three Albanian espressos.

- What's that ? - A whole lot of coffee in a tiny cup.

Then I drank a Red Bull on the way, so I don't fall asleep at the wheel.

That's all ?

- That's all ? - What's that ?

That's all ?

That's all, what ?

You're like this just from the espresso and the Red Bull ?

Meaning ?

I don't know. I'm just asking.

Ask me what you really wanna ask.

That's what I'm really asking: if all this energy

is only down to the Albanian espressos and the Red Bull.

What you're really asking is, am I lying to you ?

- You're gonna burn your omelette. - I don't give a fuck.

OK.

After all I've been through, you think I'd be stupid enough to go again...

And after all I've been through I can't even ask if you're using ?

When my dad drops money off for us, it's not OK, 'cause I'm his bitch.

When I make my own money - it's not OK, 'cause I'm coked up.

What else would've kept me up all night long ?

A goal in life ? Me ? No way !

How can I get it right ?

- Your omelette's burning. - Fuck the omelette !

You tell me what to do to get it right.

How to behave.

Not like this !

- Mister Alin ? - Who wants to know ?

- Tanase. - Tanase, who ?

White-hair Tanase.

Do you have any brothers, Relu ?

No.

I have a brother. Silviu.

Older ? Younger ?

Two minutes younger.

Your twin ?

Yeah, but not the lookalike kind, you know ?

Some twins don't look the same.

So he got the looks.

- Yeah. - Which makes you the smart one.

That's him as well.

When we were 12,

he was diagnosed with leukemia.

For three months, every day, my mom took him to hospital.

She'd take me along, she had no one to babysit.

It was winter. She'd wake us up at 5.

We'd ride the 47, all 13 stops to the hospital.

Floreasca.

And always, every single morning,

the crows were cawing - like now.

So I got it in my head that

they were waiting for him to die, to come pick at his eyes.

After we buried him, every time I went to visit his grave,

if I ever saw a crow, I stoned it till it was good and dead.

I wonder how your brother feels about sharing his grave

with all those crows.

He's cussing me out, what else ?

"Go to hell" - that's what he'd say.

Imagine, he was 12.

Hadn't had time to go all rotten.

I hate crows so much. Up there.

No care in the world. And us, down here...

- Here... - Never mind the crows.

No one's dying this time.

How would you know ? Who do you think you are ? God ?

I'm not God.

Wouldn't wanna be God.

Why would I ?

To have all the losers in the world on my conscience ?

No, thanks.

I just mind my people, that's it.

And you should do the same.

Have you talked to your wife yet ?

- No, these fuckers won't let me. - I'll ask Nico to make some calls.

And, when you do talk to Mariana, tell her to keep her mouth shut.

- My wife's not your business. - True that. She's their business.

Don't you talk about my wife.

You don't know what I'm capable of.

But you do know what they're capable of.

These concrete walls, the barbed wire...

I can see them, don't you worry.

But two years fly by.

And, sure, I might not be God,

but I know what a man's capable of when he's cornered.

Tell your wife to keep her mouth shut.

Or others will do it for her.

Pop Puiu...

People here nap between 1 and 3. You can't go blasting the TV

like you owned the place.

Oh.

And you can't smoke inside.

- Between 1 and 3 ? - No. Ever.

So, when can I watch TV ?

- Uhm... before 1 and after 3. - And can I also smoke then ?

Are you pulling my leg, pops ?

Dunno - I've got Alzheimer's.

Pops - you can't smoke ever.

- Not even when I want to ? - Outside. By the "Smoking area" sign.

What if I brought the sign in here ?

Then this would be a smoking area.

That's it. Go to bed.

Acute cardiopulmonary failure.

He suffocated in his sleep.

I wonder how he could sleep.

He did end up doing one thing right.

He died before the 6 months doctors gave him were up.

Saved me the hospital bills.

If you want a full autopsy, I know a good coroner...

Why would I want a full autopsy ?

If you wanna know the exact details of his death.

I didn't care about his life. Why should I care about his death ?

Just saying.

Maybe he had help, dying. Who knows ?

Who would...

Why ?

You tell me.

The only person who had motive was me.

I just never got up the nerve.

I wouldn't say that out loud if I were you.

Especially not around cops.

Am I a suspect ?

- If there's an inquest, who knows ? - Will there be an inquest ?

With cases like this, only if the relatives ask for one.

I've made cremation arrangements.

Then, no inquest.

So, if someone did kill him...

I'll never know who ?

Maybe it was one of the Four Horsemen.

I'm not bursting into tears and I don't need a hankie.

Don't want you to hold me, stroke my hair and say,

"there, there, it'll be OK."

There, there.

It'll be OK.

I don't believe you.

I don't think it will be OK.

Show me.

Show me, if you want me to believe you.

Show me.

You know what ?

Maybe it will be OK.

It will be OK for sure.

If I catch them trafficking.

I've gotta catch them, Nicoleta.

You don't know these people.

If you want things to be OK, you've gotta help me.

Can't do it alone.

They know everything.

What do you mean ?

They know I told you about the truck.

I was this close to getting chopped to pieces.

They came to my house at night.

With cling wrap. Get it ?

Who ?

My cousin Nicu.

And Relu.

And they let you go ?

So you'd handle me, with them pulling the strings.

I tell you everything I know. I swear.

But I only know bits and pieces, the minor stuff.

- Paganel knows more. - Paganel isn't talking.

Paganel is gonna talk. If you know how to ask.

There, there.

Take it easy.

Hey.

Why are you sneaking up on me ? Is that your idea of a joke ?

I came in through the front door. Came straight to your table.

- You came up behind me. -Because you had your back to the door.

The door I came in through.

Right.

- How long have we got ? - What ? Why ? What do you mean ?

Half an hour ? 45 minutes ?

- Should I order all the food at once ? - Oh, no, no.

No, I took the day off.

I thought we...

we could have some time alone.

I'm very sorry about last time.

Which time ?

When we went out for coffee and had a row.

I didn't sleep a wink that night, you know.

I don't know. You weren't sleeping in my bed.

I spent the whole night thinking about you.

Chuckie too, of course.

That smile on your face doesn't really go well with

"I was thinking about Chuckie."

Gina, I'm really sorry. Forgive me. I was, I wasn't...

I never truly considered what you told me about.

The hell you went through with Relu and...

I'm sorry.

I never said that.

Maybe you didn't use those words, sure, but...

Just, honestly, it never really sunk in,

what it's like, being married to a mobster, like you said.

I never said Relu was a mobster.

But you did say he lied to you...

You lie to your wife, too.

- Does that make you a mobster ? - No, no...

No, I meant how you didn't know how he made his money.

Or how he was hanging out with shady characters.

He drives a cab, it comes with the territory.

Sorry.

Speaking of, where is he ? Relu.

That's what's making you so nervous ?

Relax - he's not here.

I am relaxed. I'm not scared of the guy.

Gina - I know what kind of man I am.

And I know I'm an exceptional dad.

So, Chuckie's on my mind a lot.

I can't even talk to Relu, OK ?

He can't see Chuckie, everything's off limits.

Why ? Why ?

He got mixed up in something, as usual, only now it's gotten so bad that...

- Never mind. We should order. - Yeah, sure.

But... what's he gotten himself into ?

What's going on ? I mean... What's he up to ?

Where is he now ?

Let me check my phone and find out for you.

Oh, OK.

- When we broke up... - Yes ?

I asked him to let me stick a GPS up his ass.

So I'd always know where he's at.

- Don't you keep tabs on your wife too? - Well... my wife...

...isn't wanted by the cops, like...

What do you mean ?

Sorry. I'm so sorry.

I can't do this.

I can't. Regretfully.

- Who're you talking to ? - No one. Just myself. You.

Please, forgive me, I just can't do it.

I can't. It's over.

- You didn't just do this ! - Good day, ma'am.

I'm sorry. I can't go on, it's done.

Boss, we're here now.

We don't need the mic. We can hear you fine.

I thought, since you're taping this, to have it on the record.

Sebby, you can go now.

Your contribution to this investigation has been invaluable.

- Go on. - I'm so...

Forgive me, Gina, I didn't want to. They did... they forced me...

I'll just leave this...

Please, forgive me...

I...

He's a catch, that one.

Don't let him get away, you won't find another one like him.

This is Mister Remi. I'm Mister Emilian.

We go back a while already, you and I.

I don't know where Relu is.

What kind of wife are you, with no idea where her man's at ?

- The separated kind. - So you're not a wife anymore.

Are you still a mom, though ?

If you go to jail too, as an accessory,

you won't get 20 years, like Relu, but I'm sure they'll find you 7.

So, you won't be a mom to Chuckie anymore either.

He can handle himself.

A 14 year-old ? With no mom and no dad ?

He'll swipe a credit card.

Steal the odd car. He won't go hungry.

And when they catch him, then what ?

Same way you caught his dad ?

Oh. Touché.

But here's my counter. Mister Paganel.

- One of Relu's friends. - Don't know him.

Mister Paganel got caught a few days back

and he's gonna be inside several years.

Go ahead and call Mrs. Paganel.

Boss...

Oh, yeah...

Gotta say, she's not looking too good these days.

Talk to her, exchange recipes...

Since you'll both end up taking casseroles up to Rahova jail.

Don't you worry.

We'll catch Relu, too.

Uhum. You'll catch him...

if you can.

Hm.

He will rot in jail, you know.

Men have this tendency, to pretend they're well-hung...

...when they're really not.

- That's what you think ? - That's what Relu used to say.

And he was right.

Have a nice day.

Listen.

How long are we gonna sit out here ? My prostate's asleep.

Where are you going, pops ?

Hello there.

What are you doing here ?

What's up, pops ?

- Magda ? - Gina.

I was testing you.

He got kicked out of the nursing home. That's what's up.

I didn't get kicked out. I left.

Because you got kicked out. Go on.

Go through, I need a word with Gina.

- But... I need a word too. - Go through, I said.

Hold on. Take a seat here.

That's it, sit down.

- Don't move from there. - And do what ?

Check out the view.

We talked about this. What are you doing here ?

Relationship troubles ? Did you come for tips ?

They got Paganel ?

And you're next, huh ?

Why are they after you ?

Why are they after me ?

They got bored of busting grannies who sell parsley with no permit.

Who's the guy with the sideburns and the mustache ?

Who looks like a pervert ?

He was at the station when they took Chuckie in for shoplifting.

He just looked like a loudmouth, didn't think much of him.

- But then he showed up again today. - Where ? Was he at your place ?

- I've been dating this guy. - No way ! Dating, huh ?

- Do you wanna go into this now ? - No, into the panda situation.

I hear they're dropping like flies.

In fact, I wanted to ask you: how do we help'em ?

- It's keeping me up at night. - We've been broken up a year.

We didn't break up.

- You kicked me out of the house. - Because you lied to me.

I didn't lie.

- I didn't tell you the truth. - And the difference is ?

You didn't ask.

I didn't tell you, 'cause you didn't ask.

Hey, girl, I got you a present for your birthday.

It's from one of those bipolar foxes.

Where did you steal that from, pops ?

I made it myself. It's bison.

Pops, my birthday's six months away. Better you take it back.

- Where you took it from. - I said I made it !

It's beaver fur. I hunted them myself.

Where did you find beavers at the nursing home ?

- I flushed them out. - Where from ?

- In the woods. - Beavers live under water.

There was a river in the woods.

- Take that crap and go, let us talk. - You idiot !

Where are you gonna get another coat made from real jaguar fur ?

You didn't need to send him off like that.

Tell me where the cop showed up. At your place ?

I was at a restaurant with this person

- who I was dating... - Was dating ? Not anymore ?

And he kept asking me about you, where you were.

- Why ? Does he wanna fuck me, too ? - Relu, please !

- Go on. - They had him wear a wire.

So ? What did you say ?

Nothing, which is what I know.

And even if I did know something...

Anyway, he froze, gave himself away. That's when they showed up.

The perv and some other guy.

- Did he lay a hand on you ? - No.

- He said... - What ?

He said I'd go to jail as an accessory and Chuckie will be left all...

Don't bother, boss, just tell me the cell number.

Aww...

Got a touch of the springtime blues ?

Or did you catch a bit of AIDS ?

Haven't been sleeping.

I'll get you some of that great weed we took off you.

Me, I sleep like a baby.

Tell me, what's the news on our free will exercise ?

On what ?

- Tell me what I wanna know. - That I'm your dad ? Yeah, guilty.

Now I get what Mrs. Paganel sees in you.

It's not your looks, can't really be your smarts...

...but you're a hoot and a half.

Well-hung, too.

So you make her happy, too.

By the way, has she come to visit since you've been in here ?

Or are these jerks not letting her in ?

No worries, I'll talk to them, make it happen.

Though, I doubt she's able to come, you know...

What with her being in the ER, with three broken ribs...

...a shattered eye socket...

I hear they're not sure they can save the eye.

Oh, you didn't know ?

She got jumped in the street.

It was the damnedest thing.

She'd just come out of the police station.

She went in to make a statement about some guy, the Captain,

and some others.

But she kicked up a real fuss in there.

Real fire in her belly, man.

Mate...

This is only the beginning.

So.

"Alea jacta est" - in the words of the poet.

In other words, the die is cast.

Are you white on this board ? Or are you black ?

- I'm... - This is the time to make a call.

Now.

I'm on the clock, you know.

Three trucks with Ukraine plates.

Crossing at Galati.

Is Relu gonna be there ?

Atta boy.

We'll see about those 10 kilos of weed.

Maybe they go away.

I smoked more than half of it anyway.

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