All language subtitles for Documentary Now s04e03 Two Hairdressers in Bagglyport

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Original subtitles

โ™ช

โ™ช

โ™ช

Good evening. I'm Helen Mirren.

And you're watching "Documentary Now!" season 53.

In 1994, a BBC film crew spent a year in northern England

chronicling the inner workings of a beauty salon,

where they discovered not just a place to get one's hair styled,

but also a social club, a confessional, and a sanctuary.

This is "Two Hairdressers in Bagglyport."

[ Seagulls calling ]

โ™ช

โ™ช

Morning, Karen.

โ™ช

[ Keys jingle ]

Morning, Alice. You well?

Yes, Edwina. I'm well.

I'm well, indeed.[ Bell rings ]

Who have we got first, then?

I think we're fully booked today.

Oh, we are, yeah.

Just check that they're not in front.

[ Speaks indistinctly ]

Oh, no, I wondered what the smell was.

Hello, Mrs. Winterbottom.Morning, Barrow.

Good to see you back.

How you doing, then?

Oh, hello, Mrs. Graythorpe.

You look well. Can I take your cardigan for you?Oh!

You're a bit early.Oh, am I? I'm sorry.

Can I have a seat, then?Yeah, absolutely.

โ™ช

Hello, George.Good day, ladies.

How are you?Hi, George.

Some bills and a postcard from France for you.

Oh, that'll be Ann on a holiday.

Lovely picture, eh? Ta-ra.

Blue skies. Ta-ra, George.

Oh, that's nice.[ Door closes ]

Oh, dear. She fell ill.

She swallowed a bit of parsley, and her throat swelled up.

How horrible is that?

How's your daughter?Oh, thanks, Alice.

Oh, we're having an awful row.

Oh? What's that about?

Well, I woke up the other morning.

She's sat at me bedside.

She says to me, "Right, that's it, Mom.

There's no more gin for you."

Can you believe the nerve?

What was she, at your bedside? Is she staying with you?

Oh, no. I was in hospital.

Why were you in the hospital, then?

Well, I had a fall down the steps at the train station.

What were you doing at the train station?

I have no idea.

The last I remember, I were at the pub

having a double gin.

So your guess is as good as mine.

Edwina: Have you been to the new tapas?Woman: No, I have not.

You've never seen portions so small. No!

My Kevin ordered the prawns. He got three little ones

on a plate. No! Oh!

Says to the waiter, "I didn't know I'd ordered

off the children's menu."

[ Laughs ]

And then I had these crispy potato things called patatas.

I suppose in Spain.I suppose.

Or something like that.

And again, the portions were so small.

So my Kevin says to me,

"I suppose you ordered off the children's menu."

Yeah, I laughed.[ Laughs ]

A little bit less 'cause it was the same old joke.

Well, yeah. I suppose, yeah.

But you know my Kevin. Once he gets on he likes,

he sticks with it, doesn't he?He's lovely like that.

Isn't he? Yes, yeah.

Alice, love,

it does look like you're just moving the hair about.

Oh, dear. I am.

Well, Edwina took me on when I had nowhere else to go.

You see, my Harry died tragically on the job.

Here, I've got a picture. I'll show you.

There he is. Look at him.

He was a bricklayer.

Oh...

And he were always --

You know, before he laid the final brick,

he would always do this sort of celebratory dance.

Oh, and the lads loved watching him.

Well, there on the roof, dancing about,

waving his brick in the air.

And then last November,

they were finishing a warehouse job down by the pier.

He was in fine form.

He was, you know, doing his little, um...

Oh, I don't know what you'd call it.

Woman #2: Strut.A strut. That's it.

Yeah, he was doing his strut right on the edge.

And the bricks gave way.

Bricks he'd laid, it should be said,

but they gave way, and he fell to the ground.

Half the town was there to see it.

Yes. And, uh, the lads said

if the fall hadn't killed him,

that the hundreds of bricks that came down after

would have done him in.

And when they took him out,

he was still clutching that last brick.

And I think that speaks to how much he valued his craft.

But it wasn't the last brick, after all, was it?

Yeah, so we buried him with that brick.

And that's why they had to --

You know, and I were lost without him.

Didn't know what to do with myself.

And it were Edwina who sorted me out.

She came up to me at the funeral,

and she said, "Why don't you come by the salon on Monday,

and I'm sure we'll find something for you to do?"

Oh, I'm sorry. [ Sniffles ]

You know, but as Edwina says,

"Everyone who walks through that door can feel safe to cry here."

You need to be a bit careful, darling,

because they're making a documentary,

and they can hear you.Edwina: Well, Alicia --

Yeah, what can I say?

Well, it was easy having her join us -- Alice --

because, uh, well, you couldn't expect anybody to be nicer.

She's a lovely presence in the workplace.

But it was harder to find things for her to do.

[ Electricity crackles ]Ooh! Oh!

Well, let's say she lacks the gentle touch,

you know, that a hairdresser relies on.

Got it.

I'm happy to say, over the years,

our clientele has developed quite a high standard

of what they've come to expect of us.

Yeah, and he drove away, and it ripped the dress clean off her.

Oh! Horrible!

A great deal of this job is hairstyling,

but a great deal more is being a good listener.

Woman #3: When my Thomas came back from the war,

he was a totally different man.

Totally different.

He was two stone lighter, half a foot taller.

His red hair had turned jet black,

didn't speak a word of English.

Oh. Did you ever worry that it wasn't your Thomas?

No! No, no.

My Thomas would never pretend to be another man

pretending to be my Thomas. Oh.

Life is so confusing, isn't it?

[ Bell rings ]

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[ Seagull calling ]

Alice: Hiya, George.Hello, George.

Some boxes from a photography shop in Manchester.

Alice: Ooh, did you hear that, Edwina?

The photography boxes have arrived.

Yeah, I did hear that about the same time as you heard it.

Oh. Ooh!

And another postcard, this time from Majorca.

Ooh, Majorca? That would be Mary.

Look at that beach.Oh, that's lovely, that is.

Oh, isn't that lovely?

Oh, no. She's been kidnapped again.

Oh, that's awful.Ohh.

Oh, that's terrible.

Should I put out the ransom bucket?

Good idea. Well done, Alice.

Bit of initiative.

Oh, my Lord. ยฃ10,000 they want.

Mary's been kidnapped again. Anything you've got.

Oh, thank you, ladies. That's very, very generous of you.

All right. Thank you.

This is the Salon de Edwina stylebook.

We make it ourselves. We've been doing so since 1978,

with a new issue coming out every September.

We're very proud of this.

Yeah, that's Judy on the front cover.

The cover's the most important because it represents

the best of who we are as a salon.

Poor Judy. She died a few months after that picture was taken.

Yeah. [ Clicks tongue ]

Her daughter came up to me at the funeral

and said the nicest thing. She said,

"Do you know what, Edwina?

You made our mom's hair look nicer

than she'd ever been to any of us."

I don't know what to do with it.

Always so complicated. Ooh, dear!

[ Camera shutter clicks ]Oh!

[ Laughs ]

[ Camera shutter clicking ]

I could do this all day.

Oh, no, I certainly don't think I was Edwina's first choice

to take the photos for this year's stylebook.

But I do believe I was her onlychoice

because, apparently,

the local professionals in our photography field

are now refusing to work with Edwina

due to her what they call her rather exacting nature.

Man: Edwina? [ Scoffs ]

Yeah, I worked with Edwina.

I shot two stylebooks with Edwina. Two!

I mean, one's normally enough for any photographer.

I mean, don't get me wrong, she's probably a lovely lady,

you know, in every sense of the word.

But she has these unfair expectations

about what a camera can do.

I'll show you these proofs. And this is how they came back.

There's a question mark every now and again.

I said, "Well, what's that all about?"

She said, "The question mark, that is because

I couldn't, for the life of me, figure out

what you was trying to do."

I said, "Trying to do?! Figure it out?!"

I said, "What are you talking about, figure out?

You come in here, you couldn't figure out

your nash from your elbow.

This is not my hobby.

I've been doing it for 40 years.

I know what I'm doing.

Don't come in here talking about figuring it out."

I do know what I want,

but I don't see why I should apologize for that.

โ™ช

Woman #4: When my husband, uh, fell ill,

the doctor said he only had a week to live.

But I wouldn't listen. I knew he was a fighter.

I was with him every night, holding his hand.

And then after a week, he became so still, so quiet.

His hand was ice-cold.

Alice: Mm.

And they told me it was because he had, in fact, passed.

[ Clicks tongue ]But I still wouldn't listen.

I said I wanted to take him home with me,

where he'd get proper attention.

And then would you believe he sat bolt upright?

And I probably shouldn't tell you what he said.

Oh, it's a safe place here, love.

Well, he screamed, "Shit!"

[ Gasps ]

And then right after that, "Piss!"

Well, yeah, that weren't really him talking, were it?

Oh, it were. Certainly were.

But it was nice to hear his voice again.

I bet it was.

And then right after that, he died for certain.

And on that, we were all in agreement.

Oh, that's nice.

Yeah, it all ended very friendly.

โ™ช

Sadly, a lot of our clients are all widows,

so, uh, we keep a book

so that we can keep track of who lost which husband when,

you know, 'cause you don't want to get it wrong, do you?

Uh, for instance, here, you see?

Got Mary. Lost her Paul in 1986.

And Doris lost her Matthew 1968.

And then again Reg, in 1991.

Oh, and then there's Geraldine.

Lost nine husbands between 1971 and 1984,

because that was before we knew she was the Plumpton Poisoner.

That was a very difficult time for us

because she used the salon --

she used it as a -- Oh!

What's the word the police used, Alice?

Alibi. Alibi.

That's right. She used this place as an alibi.

She used to say, "If anyone asks,

I was in here Friday last."

Yeah, well, we didn't think anything of it

at the time, but...

Anyway, you can't stay angry with someone for that long,

can you, not after they've been through all that, you know,

losing all those husbands.

[ Metal clangs ]George: Hey!

[ Breathing heavily ]

[ Shouts ]

Hiya, Judy. Oh, don't you look lovely.

Oh, thank you!Lovely pink, isn't it?

Well, sit down. Make yourself comfortable.

Right. How do you want me?

Well, is Edwina happy with your hair?

I think so. Oh, great.

Well, we're good to go, then.

Get my fingers out. Don't want my fingers in, then.

Think of your husband.Oh!

[ Both laugh ]

Put your hand to your face. No, actually on your face.

Oh, on the face.Yeah, may-- Yeah, maybe not on your ear.

Oh, like a movie star.Like, the face part of your --

Yes. Like a movie star. You look like a movie star.

Hello, love. Hello.

Let me take your coat.Alice: Hello, Lois.

Let me take your coat.

Edwina! Yes!

Oh, it's been ages!

Has it now, love?I believe it has.

Alice: Lois was in here yesterday. Poor thing.

Her memory, it's just not what it was.

No, but Edwina would never turn her away.

No, no. She gives her what she calls a phantom trim.

Yes, I just think she wants someone to natter with.

Did I tell you a duck bit me?

What? I've never heard such a thing.

They have teeth, you know?

Alice: I think -- Um, what do they say?

Look up to the light.

Is that what the professionals say?

Oh, the shoulders -- lovely.

Oh! You look like a model, you do.

Um, a smile would be nice. Is that what you usually do?

All right.

Yeah, I think you should turn right back around,

'cause your hair looks particularly nice

from the -- from the back.

That's lovely. Yeah.

[ Breaks squeal ]

โ™ช

Patrick: Hi, ladies. All right. Hello.Edwina: Hello, Patrick.

All right. Who will be needing sandwiches today?

It depends what you've got.

Uh, butter and pickle, tomato and mayonnaise

and ham with vinegar.

Goodness me. You must have come here first today.

Ooh, sandwiches!Any news from Mary?

No, not as yet.

But you know how it is with Kidnappings.

I hope she makes it back. She promised me duty free.

She promised all of us, didn't she?

How's the photography going, Alice?

Oh, well, I'll know as soon as Edwina takes a look one time.

Ah.

[ Clicks tongue ]

That's a lovely one of Dorothy. Don't you think?

There's a real light in her eyes.

Well, I like her sweater, but her skin looks saggy.

Oh, I don't think so.Yeah, it does.

Not good in that. And there she's g--

What are you doing? Did you shock her

and take your clothes off or something?

She looks shocked to death.Oh.

No. No, no, no, no, no.

And as for her, she looks like she's on drugs.

Maybe if you look at them a little bit close up.

Yeah, but, you see...

No. No, no, look. Well, look, if we can't find one we like,

we'll just make a collage, put them all together

from the ones we got last year.

We'll put that on the cover. All right.

Yes. Yes. It would have been nice if she liked the photos.

But a collage of old photos, that will be nice, too.

[ Sighs ]

I would like to please her,

after everything she's done for me.

Yes, I'd like that very much.

Here eye in that one looks big.

โ™ช

Yeah, I think she's a bit cross-eyed.

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[ Bell rings ]

โ™ช

Edwina: Oh, I hate looking through these.

All I notice is the things I've done wrong as a hairdresser,

you know, my mistakes, what I should have done better.

It's my job t-to make them look their best.

I don't want to let them down.

These ladies have all had hard lives,

and this is the place where, you know,

it's supposed to be a bit easier.

No, it's a -- it's a small thing,

but when they first see that cover picture on the stylebook,

I -- I just want them to smile, you know?

Just smile because it reminds them

of what a special place this is.

But, no, it's got to do that,

and none of these are doing that.

[ Birds crying ]

Morning, Karen.

[ Keys jingle, bell rings ]

[ Wheels rolling ]

[ Bell rings ]

Morning, George.Oh, you're in early, Alice.

Who's this, then?

This is Gemma.

She's helping me out as part of her community service.

Right. Hello.Right over there.

What happened to your hand?

Oh, it's nothing.

I imagine these are the stylebooks.

Yes, I imagine so.

Did she go with the collage?

Well, I suppose we should find out, shouldn't we?

[ Grunts ]

Off we go.

Ta-ra, George.

Ta-ra.

[ Bell rings ]

[ Gasps ]

[ Chuckles ]

[ Cries ]

[ Cries ]

[ Indistinct conversations ]

Well, I had nothing to do with that.

No!

[ Conversations continue ]

And the way that hair, you see, that's right.

No, it doesn't.

I think it's a good...

Hey, Alice, don't you look wonderful.

Oh, well, that's the trick, girls.

When you're the photographer,

they have to use your photo, don't they?

Yeah, she pulled one over me, I can tell you.

I nearly died when I saw it, I did.

Oh, well, speaking of, did you hear the news about Gladys?

She died in the toilet.No!

On the toilet?!

Edwina: No, inthe toilet.

She dropped her wedding ring in. She reached in to get it,

and her hand got stuck.[ All gasp ]

She must have been there yelling for ages

'cause, you know, her Dave was off away.

And it wasn't till he got back from his work trip

that he found her.Oh, and poor Dave.

Can you imagine coming home

and finding your wife dead in the loo?

Look what came back from Majorca!

Oh, Mary!

Well, the ransom must have gone through, then.

Mary, come on in, love.

Mary!Look at that!

Welcome back!

There you go.

Oh, look, she's brought us the duty free!

[ All talking ]

Oh, we're going to have a feast.

[ Laughter ]

That's our Mary. She's always coming through for us,

isn't she? Oh!

All right, come and sit down. We'll make you lovely.

Oh, she never fails.

I think you brought it home, Mary.

[ Indistinct conversations ]

I'll get the glasses.

[ Conversations continue ]

All right.

โ™ช

All right, Mary, would you like a sherry?

How were the kidnappers, Mary,

you know, compared to the last time?

โ™ช

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โ™ช

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