Original subtitles

Kind: captions Language: en

thank you

[Music]

Birds

Birds

Birds [Music]

[Music]

[Music] thank you

thank you

thank you [Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause] [Music]

oh I think she's so pretty

oh I think she's so pretty

oh I think she's so pretty what

what

what I love you

wow

wow

wow [Music]

[Music]

[Music] I guess you didn't think I was gonna

I guess you didn't think I was gonna

I guess you didn't think I was gonna make it did you Earl oh Lord help me

now

hey

hey

hey make all the ugly and the world go away

make all the ugly and the world go away

make all the ugly and the world go away okay

[Music]

now who's in church

now who's in church

now who's in church helps us late

lord it's tough enough to dinner

lord it's tough enough to dinner

lord it's tough enough to dinner [Music]

friends

[Music]

sky

sky

sky [Music]

and I've used to say to the sinner

and I've used to say to the sinner

and I've used to say to the sinner who's to say and who you can learn if

who's to say and who you can learn if

who's to say and who you can learn if you can't well it's easy

you can't well it's easy

you can't well it's easy [Music]

[Music]

[Music]

time to give a damn

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] it a [ __ ]

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] realize

realize

realize [Music]

eyes

my work

my work

my work hold on to get in here you are not gonna

hold on to get in here you are not gonna

hold on to get in here you are not gonna believe this hoarder's house I can't I

believe this hoarder's house I can't I

believe this hoarder's house I can't I am late from a Hospital visitation

am late from a Hospital visitation

am late from a Hospital visitation duties and I am taking no leader with me

duties and I am taking no leader with me

duties and I am taking no leader with me to see her mama

to see her mama

to see her mama no later

lay down my ponytail I wonder why

lay down my ponytail I wonder why

lay down my ponytail I wonder why Brenda's house makes no leaders try to

Brenda's house makes no leaders try to

Brenda's house makes no leaders try to look tidy collects dolls because her

look tidy collects dolls because her

look tidy collects dolls because her daughter down when Brenda was passed out

daughter down when Brenda was passed out

daughter down when Brenda was passed out drunk tragic

I am just glad to see you back in front

I am just glad to see you back in front

I am just glad to see you back in front of that TV you've had your nose stuck in

of that TV you've had your nose stuck in

of that TV you've had your nose stuck in the Bible for the last few months

the Bible for the last few months

the Bible for the last few months you done almost I had to take a break

you done almost I had to take a break

you done almost I had to take a break Revelation scares a Dickens out of me

Revelation scares a Dickens out of me

Revelation scares a Dickens out of me barely slept last night

barely slept last night

barely slept last night I just do not know what possessed you to

I just do not know what possessed you to

I just do not know what possessed you to read the entire Bible cover to cover I

read the entire Bible cover to cover I

read the entire Bible cover to cover I think I'd kill myself

think I'd kill myself

think I'd kill myself with time Kyle flitting from one state

with time Kyle flitting from one state

with time Kyle flitting from one state to another getting gay married and

to another getting gay married and

to another getting gay married and coupled with that Supreme Court decision

coupled with that Supreme Court decision

coupled with that Supreme Court decision and now what's going on down at the

and now what's going on down at the

and now what's going on down at the church house

church house

church house I just needed to figure out some things

I just needed to figure out some things

I just needed to figure out some things from a theft

from a theft

from a theft just to me if David can have bathsheba's

just to me if David can have bathsheba's

just to me if David can have bathsheba's husband killed in battle

husband killed in battle

husband killed in battle so he can marry that adulterating

so he can marry that adulterating

so he can marry that adulterating pregnant [ __ ]

pregnant [ __ ]

pregnant [ __ ] to add to his [ __ ] ton of other wives

to add to his [ __ ] ton of other wives

to add to his [ __ ] ton of other wives our nephew can marry the one man that he

our nephew can marry the one man that he

our nephew can marry the one man that he loves you're being too hard on Bathsheba

loves you're being too hard on Bathsheba

loves you're being too hard on Bathsheba David used his position as king to have

David used his position as king to have

David used his position as king to have his way with her do not blame the victim

his way with her do not blame the victim

his way with her do not blame the victim how is nolita's Mama test still pending

how is nolita's Mama test still pending

how is nolita's Mama test still pending they've narrowed it down to

they've narrowed it down to

they've narrowed it down to either stomach cancer or a severe case

either stomach cancer or a severe case

either stomach cancer or a severe case of tomane which she might have gotten

of tomane which she might have gotten

of tomane which she might have gotten from her very own leftover tuna

from her very own leftover tuna

from her very own leftover tuna casserole which she left out all night

casserole which she left out all night

casserole which she left out all night in this heat then she ate it for

in this heat then she ate it for

in this heat then she ate it for breakfast

breakfast

breakfast or kid's nose better than that it's

or kid's nose better than that it's

or kid's nose better than that it's summer and

summer and

summer and tuna casserole for breakfast [ __ ] tents

tuna casserole for breakfast [ __ ] tents

tuna casserole for breakfast [ __ ] tents can I borrow a pack of cigarettes I'm

can I borrow a pack of cigarettes I'm

can I borrow a pack of cigarettes I'm running low yes but you pay me back this

running low yes but you pay me back this

running low yes but you pay me back this time there's a high now to make us all

time there's a high now to make us all

time there's a high now to make us all quit

quit

quit I'm gonna pray Hortense has Tomei

I'm gonna pray Hortense has Tomei

I'm gonna pray Hortense has Tomei instead of stomach cancer

well

well

well no that's all right I'll just read just

no that's all right I'll just read just

no that's all right I'll just read just read my look on my way over to visit

read my look on my way over to visit

read my look on my way over to visit mama you wouldn't have that problem if

mama you wouldn't have that problem if

mama you wouldn't have that problem if you just choose a look and stick to it

you just choose a look and stick to it

you just choose a look and stick to it that's right me and Sissy's hair has

that's right me and Sissy's hair has

that's right me and Sissy's hair has stood still for decades

just the latest on a developing story we

just the latest on a developing story we

just the latest on a developing story we have confirmed that convicted serial

have confirmed that convicted serial

have confirmed that convicted serial killer Billy Joe Dawson speak with Jesus

killer Billy Joe Dawson speak with Jesus

killer Billy Joe Dawson speak with Jesus he's that serial killer from over in

he's that serial killer from over in

he's that serial killer from over in Longview who picked up hitchhikers and

Longview who picked up hitchhikers and

Longview who picked up hitchhikers and killed him I conquered him on the head

killed him I conquered him on the head

killed him I conquered him on the head with a sledgehammer he stole while

with a sledgehammer he stole while

with a sledgehammer he stole while working at a meat packing plant right

working at a meat packing plant right

working at a meat packing plant right over in Tyler he is so hot I guess I

over in Tyler he is so hot I guess I

over in Tyler he is so hot I guess I won't be hitchhiking anytime soon or

won't be hitchhiking anytime soon or

won't be hitchhiking anytime soon or I'll end up in the graveyard all right

I'll end up in the graveyard all right

I'll end up in the graveyard all right well Mama

well Mama

well Mama it's been 17 years since you died

it's been 17 years since you died

it's been 17 years since you died the day you cost so much chaos and all

the day you cost so much chaos and all

the day you cost so much chaos and all hell broke loose

hell broke loose

hell broke loose my son came out as gay right in front of

my son came out as gay right in front of

my son came out as gay right in front of your coffee

your coffee

your coffee and is now legally married to me

and is now legally married to me

and is now legally married to me thanks to the U.S Supreme Court

thanks to the U.S Supreme Court

thanks to the U.S Supreme Court I'll give you a moment to roll over in

I'll give you a moment to roll over in

I'll give you a moment to roll over in Your Grave

oh mama

oh mama

oh mama so much has happened

so much has happened

so much has happened we'll select me

we'll select me

we'll select me took my credit card

my beautiful home

my beautiful home

my beautiful home I had to move into a 1700 square foot

I had to move into a 1700 square foot

I had to move into a 1700 square foot house back here in Winters Texas where

house back here in Winters Texas where

house back here in Winters Texas where there's a constant parade a crazy

there's a constant parade a crazy

there's a constant parade a crazy dancing in the street

dancing in the street

dancing in the street You Got Me Wrong so I'm doing you right

You Got Me Wrong so I'm doing you right

You Got Me Wrong so I'm doing you right you'll find your bag out on the porch

you'll find your bag out on the porch

you'll find your bag out on the porch tonight don't gotta get that same song

oh Peggy Peggy piggy

oh Peggy Peggy piggy

oh Peggy Peggy piggy 17 years ago these song [ __ ]

17 years ago these song [ __ ]

17 years ago these song [ __ ] killed the love of my life

killed the love of my life

killed the love of my life well now technically it wasn't them some

well now technically it wasn't them some

well now technically it wasn't them some [ __ ] GW remember no leader burnt up

[ __ ] GW remember no leader burnt up

[ __ ] GW remember no leader burnt up them wooden legs to kill Peggy I know

them wooden legs to kill Peggy I know

them wooden legs to kill Peggy I know that you idiot you don't have to get

that you idiot you don't have to get

that you idiot you don't have to get nasty

nasty

nasty you look on the bright side at least you

you look on the bright side at least you

you look on the bright side at least you once had a wife and a mistress

once had a wife and a mistress

once had a wife and a mistress some of us ain't never found love

some of us ain't never found love

some of us ain't never found love maybe it's because no one wants you

maybe it's because no one wants you

maybe it's because no one wants you Odell you got that right God damn it

Odell you got that right God damn it

Odell you got that right God damn it halfway I was struck by lightning

halfway I was struck by lightning

halfway I was struck by lightning that's why I'm a little slow

that's why I'm a little slow

that's why I'm a little slow made you smarter in my opinion

made you smarter in my opinion

made you smarter in my opinion Princess Margaret was Queen Elizabeth's

Princess Margaret was Queen Elizabeth's

Princess Margaret was Queen Elizabeth's sister and her former daughter-in-law

sister and her former daughter-in-law

sister and her former daughter-in-law Sarah Ferguson is a duchess and Prince

Sarah Ferguson is a duchess and Prince

Sarah Ferguson is a duchess and Prince Charles

Charles

Charles had a mistress Camilla Parker Bowles

and that's what killed Diana

and that's what killed Diana

and that's what killed Diana well that's good to know Juanita well I

well that's good to know Juanita well I

well that's good to know Juanita well I ain't never seen any love in your life

ain't never seen any love in your life

ain't never seen any love in your life neither me and lavonda had a good thing

neither me and lavonda had a good thing

neither me and lavonda had a good thing going at one time yeah until she dumped

going at one time yeah until she dumped

going at one time yeah until she dumped your ass like a million years ago

your ass like a million years ago

your ass like a million years ago victory

victory

victory that's a new one I made up just right

that's a new one I made up just right

that's a new one I made up just right now B for victory you see

now B for victory you see

now B for victory you see looks like a big hairless vagina to me

looks like a big hairless vagina to me

looks like a big hairless vagina to me I don't like that I got something to

I don't like that I got something to

I don't like that I got something to make you feel better GW a bullet through

make you feel better GW a bullet through

make you feel better GW a bullet through my head no I'm putting back together

my head no I'm putting back together

my head no I'm putting back together that 15-year tribute for Peggy That was

that 15-year tribute for Peggy That was

that 15-year tribute for Peggy That was supposed to have two years ago got

supposed to have two years ago got

supposed to have two years ago got derailed by that hail storm and Odell

derailed by that hail storm and Odell

derailed by that hail storm and Odell getting struck by lightning and then

getting struck by lightning and then

getting struck by lightning and then last year Juanita went missing for two

last year Juanita went missing for two

last year Juanita went missing for two days

days

days did you find me you got locked in the

did you find me you got locked in the

did you find me you got locked in the storage closet passed out drunk from

storage closet passed out drunk from

storage closet passed out drunk from trying each and every one of my Liquors

trying each and every one of my Liquors

trying each and every one of my Liquors in there

in there

in there Good Times

I never should have tried to catch them

I never should have tried to catch them

I never should have tried to catch them hail balls in my mouth like peanuts

hail balls in my mouth like peanuts

hail balls in my mouth like peanuts error judgment we'll just make it a

error judgment we'll just make it a

error judgment we'll just make it a 17-year anniversary

17-year anniversary

17-year anniversary we can get together and sing Peggy's

we can get together and sing Peggy's

we can get together and sing Peggy's favorite hymns just like the good old

favorite hymns just like the good old

favorite hymns just like the good old days that's going to be like the good

days that's going to be like the good

days that's going to be like the good old days when the love of my life Peggy

old days when the love of my life Peggy

old days when the love of my life Peggy is six feet under you can't kill love GW

is six feet under you can't kill love GW

is six feet under you can't kill love GW that life can carry you

that life can carry you

that life can carry you and you don't want that

did she just make sense

did she just make sense

did she just make sense out even a blind hog finds an acre never

out even a blind hog finds an acre never

out even a blind hog finds an acre never now then

come to me Tammy I need you

come to me Tammy I need you

come to me Tammy I need you why don't you ever come to me anymore

yeah

yeah

yeah I'm gonna call my [ __ ]

I'm gonna call my [ __ ]

I'm gonna call my [ __ ] no no no no

no no no no

no no no no no oh bless your heart

hello

brother boy how are you hon

brother boy how are you hon

brother boy how are you hon see I've been having this dream my

see I've been having this dream my

see I've been having this dream my fantasies of Wardell and I'm getting

fantasies of Wardell and I'm getting

fantasies of Wardell and I'm getting married have started up again but it was

married have started up again but it was

married have started up again but it was a beautiful wedding

thanks for asking me

thanks for asking me

thanks for asking me it was a dream [ __ ]

it was a dream [ __ ]

it was a dream [ __ ] but then the dream turns into an awful

but then the dream turns into an awful

but then the dream turns into an awful awful Nightmare and the wedding becomes

awful Nightmare and the wedding becomes

awful Nightmare and the wedding becomes Mama's funeral but Dr Abe remember that

Mama's funeral but Dr Abe remember that

Mama's funeral but Dr Abe remember that mean old store big titty Doctor Who was

mean old store big titty Doctor Who was

mean old store big titty Doctor Who was trying to dehobal sexualize me after

trying to dehobal sexualize me after

trying to dehobal sexualize me after Looney being I do indeed I do not care

Looney being I do indeed I do not care

Looney being I do indeed I do not care for her yeah well Dr Eva said Mama's

for her yeah well Dr Eva said Mama's

for her yeah well Dr Eva said Mama's coffin not mama and she tries to get him

coffin not mama and she tries to get him

coffin not mama and she tries to get him to well to [ __ ]

to well to [ __ ]

to well to [ __ ] to have carnal relations with me right

to have carnal relations with me right

to have carnal relations with me right there in the church house

Thursday ah Mama's death date

Thursday ah Mama's death date

Thursday ah Mama's death date she died 17 years ago she's haunting me

she died 17 years ago she's haunting me

she died 17 years ago she's haunting me because she never wanted me to be happy

because she never wanted me to be happy

because she never wanted me to be happy oh sweet baby Jesus how time flies

oh sweet baby Jesus how time flies

oh sweet baby Jesus how time flies seems like this yesterday that Peggy

seems like this yesterday that Peggy

seems like this yesterday that Peggy tripped over them wooden legs and hit

tripped over them wooden legs and hit

tripped over them wooden legs and hit her head on that nasty old sink at the

her head on that nasty old sink at the

her head on that nasty old sink at the Galaxy Motel while having that affair

Galaxy Motel while having that affair

Galaxy Motel while having that affair with GW nether caught

with GW nether caught

with GW nether caught hello sweet boy hey Mama I'm calling you

hello sweet boy hey Mama I'm calling you

hello sweet boy hey Mama I'm calling you from Dallas Dallas you're so close

with Jake yes ma'am

with Jake yes ma'am

with Jake yes ma'am this last part is what I like to call

this last part is what I like to call

this last part is what I like to call the Weeping and gnashing of teeth part

the Weeping and gnashing of teeth part

the Weeping and gnashing of teeth part of the tour uh-huh well y'all sure did

of the tour uh-huh well y'all sure did

of the tour uh-huh well y'all sure did get a lot of press that was the point

get a lot of press that was the point

get a lot of press that was the point great for your cause not always easy on

great for your cause not always easy on

great for your cause not always easy on mothers in Winners Texas well I'm sorry

mothers in Winners Texas well I'm sorry

mothers in Winners Texas well I'm sorry that exposing bigotry has caused you

that exposing bigotry has caused you

that exposing bigotry has caused you such grief mama

such grief mama

such grief mama don't worry about it I'm used to being

don't worry about it I'm used to being

don't worry about it I'm used to being gossiped about by now but how

gossiped about by now but how

gossiped about by now but how son I'm just now finding out Kyle's up

son I'm just now finding out Kyle's up

son I'm just now finding out Kyle's up for a big job at Mitchell Gold Bob

for a big job at Mitchell Gold Bob

for a big job at Mitchell Gold Bob Williams

Williams

Williams head design associate

head design associate

head design associate I have to choose between Dallas and

I have to choose between Dallas and

I have to choose between Dallas and Atlanta oh choose Dallas

Atlanta oh choose Dallas

Atlanta oh choose Dallas I could come up there and Shop Kyle gets

I could come up there and Shop Kyle gets

I could come up there and Shop Kyle gets family discounts right I need new shades

family discounts right I need new shades

family discounts right I need new shades in tow we'll get right on that and you

in tow we'll get right on that and you

in tow we'll get right on that and you can visit winners often yes that would

can visit winners often yes that would

can visit winners often yes that would be

be

be horrible

horrible

horrible although

although

although maybe we could make Texas number 50 in

maybe we could make Texas number 50 in

maybe we could make Texas number 50 in Winters

Winters

Winters and you could throw us our wedding that

and you could throw us our wedding that

and you could throw us our wedding that would certainly get lots of attention

would certainly get lots of attention

would certainly get lots of attention now aren't these flowers pretty it's

now aren't these flowers pretty it's

now aren't these flowers pretty it's your name's death day I'm in the

your name's death day I'm in the

your name's death day I'm in the cemetery as we speak I wish you were

cemetery as we speak I wish you were

cemetery as we speak I wish you were here but you'll always find a reason not

here but you'll always find a reason not

here but you'll always find a reason not to visit winners I just gave you a

to visit winners I just gave you a

to visit winners I just gave you a reason for me to come home and you

reason for me to come home and you

reason for me to come home and you change the subject oh let's not fight

change the subject oh let's not fight

change the subject oh let's not fight time you know I love you I do and I'm

time you know I love you I do and I'm

time you know I love you I do and I'm really happy that you and Kyla found

really happy that you and Kyla found

really happy that you and Kyla found each other I just well

each other I just well

each other I just well just not exactly the kind of wedding

just not exactly the kind of wedding

just not exactly the kind of wedding that I always envisioned me neither

that I always envisioned me neither

that I always envisioned me neither because I never thought it was possible

because I never thought it was possible

because I never thought it was possible because I was taught by you and

because I was taught by you and

because I was taught by you and everybody else okay you're right you're

everybody else okay you're right you're

everybody else okay you're right you're right let's uh change the subject

right let's uh change the subject

right let's uh change the subject um because I've been saving the big news

um because I've been saving the big news

um because I've been saving the big news and I mean big

and I mean big

and I mean big hey Latrell what would you prefer to be

hey Latrell what would you prefer to be

hey Latrell what would you prefer to be called Grandma Mima Nana or my personal

called Grandma Mima Nana or my personal

called Grandma Mima Nana or my personal favorite because you're So Glamorous

favorite because you're So Glamorous

favorite because you're So Glamorous glamor wait what

glamor wait what

glamor wait what are you here yes our surrogate just

are you here yes our surrogate just

are you here yes our surrogate just finished her first trimester and we

finished her first trimester and we

finished her first trimester and we wanted to wait you know just to be sure

wanted to wait you know just to be sure

wanted to wait you know just to be sure but you are going to be a glamor of

but you are going to be a glamor of

but you are going to be a glamor of twins

good to see you Mitchell

good to see you Mitchell

good to see you Mitchell boss man just arrived hey Mitchell Bye

boss man just arrived hey Mitchell Bye

boss man just arrived hey Mitchell Bye Mom oh welcome good to see you guys too

Mom oh welcome good to see you guys too

Mom oh welcome good to see you guys too come on back let's talk so I saw all the

come on back let's talk so I saw all the

come on back let's talk so I saw all the Press on the recent weddings perfect

Press on the recent weddings perfect

Press on the recent weddings perfect media intention for faith in America

media intention for faith in America

media intention for faith in America great job Ty that was incredible and

great job Ty that was incredible and

great job Ty that was incredible and UConn what's it going to be Dallas or

UConn what's it going to be Dallas or

UConn what's it going to be Dallas or Atlanta

come on

come on

come on I don't speak I don't speak grunting

I don't speak I don't speak grunting

I don't speak I don't speak grunting Aunt little Macy

Aunt little Macy

Aunt little Macy [Music]

[Music]

[Music] oh hello there brother boy

oh hello there brother boy

oh hello there brother boy lavanda

lavanda

lavanda I need your help

I need your help

I need your help my talents are being wasted here in Long

my talents are being wasted here in Long

my talents are being wasted here in Long [ __ ] View Texas I need you to rescue

[ __ ] View Texas I need you to rescue

[ __ ] View Texas I need you to rescue me uh-huh well did you hear that the

me uh-huh well did you hear that the

me uh-huh well did you hear that the hitchhiker murderer has escaped the pan

hitchhiker murderer has escaped the pan

hitchhiker murderer has escaped the pan from Longview you know and he's killed

from Longview you know and he's killed

from Longview you know and he's killed people all over that area had sex with

people all over that area had sex with

people all over that area had sex with those he murdered he's supposed to be

those he murdered he's supposed to be

those he murdered he's supposed to be executed next week lavonda please you

executed next week lavonda please you

executed next week lavonda please you know I front and easily I'm fragile it's

know I front and easily I'm fragile it's

know I front and easily I'm fragile it's a little baby kitten

a little baby kitten

a little baby kitten and Mama's ghost is helping me

and Mama's ghost is helping me

and Mama's ghost is helping me it's not the good hunting like when

it's not the good hunting like when

it's not the good hunting like when Tammy comes to me it's a bad hunting and

Tammy comes to me it's a bad hunting and

Tammy comes to me it's a bad hunting and they've made lavonda this new crack

they've made lavonda this new crack

they've made lavonda this new crack Queen head of the show and she has me of

Queen head of the show and she has me of

Queen head of the show and she has me of profession she is saying that I have to

profession she is saying that I have to

profession she is saying that I have to give up Tammy

give up Tammy

give up Tammy I have to give a flow red and I have to

I have to give a flow red and I have to

I have to give a flow red and I have to give up dolly

give up dolly

give up dolly I have no show my new show is called we

I have no show my new show is called we

I have no show my new show is called we three queens

I mean who am I supposed to do lavanda

I mean who am I supposed to do lavanda

I mean who am I supposed to do lavanda Carrie Underwood

Carrie Underwood

Carrie Underwood our kind of Christianity frightens me

our kind of Christianity frightens me

our kind of Christianity frightens me I mean one minute she's asking for Jesus

I mean one minute she's asking for Jesus

I mean one minute she's asking for Jesus to please take the wheel and then the

to please take the wheel and then the

to please take the wheel and then the next minute she's beating out the

next minute she's beating out the

next minute she's beating out the headlights of her cheating

headlights of her cheating

headlights of her cheating ex-boyfriend's truck

ex-boyfriend's truck

ex-boyfriend's truck what about that other what am I supposed

what about that other what am I supposed

what about that other what am I supposed to do I heard the little fleshy the real

to do I heard the little fleshy the real

to do I heard the little fleshy the real sweet one married to Blake Shelton

sweet one married to Blake Shelton

sweet one married to Blake Shelton Miranda Lambert they're getting divorced

Miranda Lambert they're getting divorced

Miranda Lambert they're getting divorced and she's lost weight well I hadn't my

and she's lost weight well I hadn't my

and she's lost weight well I hadn't my biggest Dallas a half of Fort Worth it

biggest Dallas a half of Fort Worth it

biggest Dallas a half of Fort Worth it looked like my water is about to break

looked like my water is about to break

looked like my water is about to break and I can't pull off them young ones

and I can't pull off them young ones

and I can't pull off them young ones lavonda I mean you can just dim the

lavonda I mean you can just dim the

lavonda I mean you can just dim the lights solo and then you're in the dark

and move me up to Dallas where

and move me up to Dallas where

and move me up to Dallas where opportunity is rampant

opportunity is rampant

opportunity is rampant I heard about this bar lavonda called

I heard about this bar lavonda called

I heard about this bar lavonda called The Rose Room

The Rose Room

The Rose Room seats 500 people

seats 500 people

seats 500 people I need that kind of appreciation

I need that kind of appreciation

I need that kind of appreciation I wonder

I wonder

I wonder I need that kind of applause

I need that kind of applause

I need that kind of applause I need

I need

I need so much for what I need my precious

so much for what I need my precious

so much for what I need my precious presence

for me

[Applause]

[Music]

oh

hello Trail

hello Trail

hello Trail gotta meet the new preacher

gotta meet the new preacher

gotta meet the new preacher Jimmy Ray

Jimmy Ray Bruton he's my nephew and he's

Jimmy Ray Bruton he's my nephew and he's

Jimmy Ray Bruton he's my nephew and he's gonna carry on now that Cecil has has

gonna carry on now that Cecil has has

gonna carry on now that Cecil has has gone on to glory to meet Jesus

gone on to glory to meet Jesus

gone on to glory to meet Jesus Jimmy Ray this is Latrell Williamson

Jimmy Ray this is Latrell Williamson

Jimmy Ray this is Latrell Williamson she's the one I told you about with the

she's the one I told you about with the

she's the one I told you about with the Sun

Sun

Sun another good Lord sure did bless you

another good Lord sure did bless you

another good Lord sure did bless you with beauty Latrell

with beauty Latrell

with beauty Latrell oh did indeed

oh did indeed

oh did indeed thank you

we'll have a question

we'll have a question

we'll have a question now that marriage equality is the law of

now that marriage equality is the law of

now that marriage equality is the law of the land uh how is this revival well

the land uh how is this revival well

the land uh how is this revival well gonna change things spring course not

gonna change things spring course not

gonna change things spring course not the law of this land

the law of this land

the law of this land word of God's law of this land well

word of God's law of this land well

word of God's law of this land well actually if memory serves me right uh

actually if memory serves me right uh

actually if memory serves me right uh it's not exactly

it's not exactly

it's not exactly the Constitution is the law the land not

the Constitution is the law the land not

the Constitution is the law the land not the Bible

the Bible

the Bible the separation of church and state

the separation of church and state

the separation of church and state something we all should have been taught

something we all should have been taught

something we all should have been taught in school

in school

in school she's a fast dealer ain't she indeed she

she's a fast dealer ain't she indeed she

she's a fast dealer ain't she indeed she is oh I could tell you stories I'm sure

is oh I could tell you stories I'm sure

is oh I could tell you stories I'm sure you already have

you already have

you already have fact of the matter is five liberal

fact of the matter is five liberal

fact of the matter is five liberal justices and an ungodly

justices and an ungodly

justices and an ungodly Muslim president

Muslim president

Muslim president can't take away my

your biblical and constitutional right

your biblical and constitutional right

your biblical and constitutional right to live according to your deeply held

to live according to your deeply held

to live according to your deeply held beliefs

you wanna you've lost me because as I

you wanna you've lost me because as I

you wanna you've lost me because as I said it's the law well that's true but

said it's the law well that's true but

said it's the law well that's true but as Christian Warriors we have to fight

as Christian Warriors we have to fight

as Christian Warriors we have to fight for our Lord

for our Lord

for our Lord and here's your answer we are going to

and here's your answer we are going to

and here's your answer we are going to make Reynolds County a sanctuary County

make Reynolds County a sanctuary County

make Reynolds County a sanctuary County for the institution of biblical marriage

for the institution of biblical marriage

for the institution of biblical marriage one man one woman and to never have a

one man one woman and to never have a

one man one woman and to never have a gay marriage performed in this County

gay marriage performed in this County

gay marriage performed in this County ever ever we want our rainbow back we do

ever ever we want our rainbow back we do

ever ever we want our rainbow back we do indeed and there have been consequences

indeed and there have been consequences

indeed and there have been consequences to the moral Decay this country caused

to the moral Decay this country caused

to the moral Decay this country caused by the gays and the acceptance of their

by the gays and the acceptance of their

by the gays and the acceptance of their lifestyle and there will be more 9 11

lifestyle and there will be more 9 11

lifestyle and there will be more 9 11 AIDS Obama's election Hurricane Katrina

AIDS Obama's election Hurricane Katrina

AIDS Obama's election Hurricane Katrina and Sandy oh and don't forget that

and Sandy oh and don't forget that

and Sandy oh and don't forget that Japanese tsunami and fire ants all

Japanese tsunami and fire ants all

Japanese tsunami and fire ants all because of the gays well you know I

because of the gays well you know I

because of the gays well you know I consider myself a God-fearing Christian

consider myself a God-fearing Christian

consider myself a God-fearing Christian but I find it hard to believe that the

but I find it hard to believe that the

but I find it hard to believe that the gays wield enough power to control the

gays wield enough power to control the

gays wield enough power to control the weather

weather

weather and disease

and disease

and disease in insects

in insects

in insects will allow me to

will allow me to

will allow me to correct you here you see God has the

correct you here you see God has the

correct you here you see God has the power to respond appropriately to

power to respond appropriately to

power to respond appropriately to immorality

immorality

immorality it's our responsibility to protect this

it's our responsibility to protect this

it's our responsibility to protect this County from his Wrath

will Things become a little cloudy

will Things become a little cloudy

will Things become a little cloudy and complicated when

I'm sure you've been told that my son is

I'm sure you've been told that my son is

I'm sure you've been told that my son is gay

gay

gay I have heard that

I have heard that

I have heard that I'm so so sorry

I'm so so sorry

I'm so so sorry that cross must be so hard for you to

that cross must be so hard for you to

that cross must be so hard for you to carry

carry

carry now you just might need this revival

now you just might need this revival

now you just might need this revival more than anybody in this town

won't you come by on Friday on the trail

won't you come by on Friday on the trail

won't you come by on Friday on the trail and I promise you that everything will

and I promise you that everything will

and I promise you that everything will become crystal clear

hmm

you know what I think I will I just

you know what I think I will I just

you know what I think I will I just can't come right now I'm here at the

can't come right now I'm here at the

can't come right now I'm here at the hospital sitting with Evelyn Crawley's

hospital sitting with Evelyn Crawley's

hospital sitting with Evelyn Crawley's Aunt little Niecy and little Niecy who

Aunt little Niecy and little Niecy who

Aunt little Niecy and little Niecy who used to have all them feral cats and a

used to have all them feral cats and a

used to have all them feral cats and a pet skunk well I thought she died

why are you setting with The Afflicted

why are you setting with The Afflicted

why are you setting with The Afflicted lavonda that is so unlike you Evelyn has

lavonda that is so unlike you Evelyn has

lavonda that is so unlike you Evelyn has had something on me for years which I do

had something on me for years which I do

had something on me for years which I do not want to discuss and she has just

not want to discuss and she has just

not want to discuss and she has just been waiting to collect what's wrong

been waiting to collect what's wrong

been waiting to collect what's wrong with that little Niecy besides

with that little Niecy besides

with that little Niecy besides maintenance and insanity

maintenance and insanity

maintenance and insanity well Evelyn was in her kitchen pickling

well Evelyn was in her kitchen pickling

well Evelyn was in her kitchen pickling Oak was from her garden and she put Aunt

Oak was from her garden and she put Aunt

Oak was from her garden and she put Aunt little Niecy in front of the television

little Niecy in front of the television

little Niecy in front of the television to keep her occupied and to keep her

to keep her occupied and to keep her

to keep her occupied and to keep her from going through her underwear drawer

from going through her underwear drawer

from going through her underwear drawer again she

again she

again she she's underwear likes to try every one

she's underwear likes to try every one

she's underwear likes to try every one of them all there's nothing crazy about

of them all there's nothing crazy about

of them all there's nothing crazy about that

that

that well it it stretches them out wow anyway

well it it stretches them out wow anyway

well it it stretches them out wow anyway Aunt little Niecy just loves that show

Aunt little Niecy just loves that show

Aunt little Niecy just loves that show where the sponges talk I mean whoever

where the sponges talk I mean whoever

where the sponges talk I mean whoever came up with that show had to be on

came up with that show had to be on

came up with that show had to be on drugs if you ask me

drugs if you ask me

drugs if you ask me looks up at the clock heavy honey is

looks up at the clock heavy honey is

looks up at the clock heavy honey is this as boring to you as it is to me

who looks better fat anyway she goes in

who looks better fat anyway she goes in

who looks better fat anyway she goes in there tries to change the channel on the

there tries to change the channel on the

there tries to change the channel on the TV and that's when the trouble started

TV and that's when the trouble started

TV and that's when the trouble started that is a lot of detail lavanda

that is a lot of detail lavanda

that is a lot of detail lavanda you asked and I listened to your SOB

you asked and I listened to your SOB

you asked and I listened to your SOB sister story for 30 [ __ ] minutes okay

sister story for 30 [ __ ] minutes okay

sister story for 30 [ __ ] minutes okay okay proceed

okay proceed

okay proceed came a battle over that remote Ellen

came a battle over that remote Ellen

came a battle over that remote Ellen could not pry that remote out of Aunt

could not pry that remote out of Aunt

could not pry that remote out of Aunt little niecy's hand grip of death and

little niecy's hand grip of death and

little niecy's hand grip of death and during the struggle that remote landed

during the struggle that remote landed

during the struggle that remote landed upside Evelyn's head well that did it

upside Evelyn's head well that did it

upside Evelyn's head well that did it Evelyn lost her temper and little Niecy

Evelyn lost her temper and little Niecy

Evelyn lost her temper and little Niecy lost hers so right

she goes into a full-blown epileptic

she goes into a full-blown epileptic

she goes into a full-blown epileptic seizure and bit off her tongue met up

seizure and bit off her tongue met up

seizure and bit off her tongue met up for tongue yes Lord

for tongue yes Lord

for tongue yes Lord put that bit off tongue in the pickle

put that bit off tongue in the pickle

put that bit off tongue in the pickle jar she was using for putting up her

jar she was using for putting up her

jar she was using for putting up her okra dump that good okra right in the

okra dump that good okra right in the

okra dump that good okra right in the sink Pat that jar with ice great

sink Pat that jar with ice great

sink Pat that jar with ice great thinking sure was and she got Aunt

thinking sure was and she got Aunt

thinking sure was and she got Aunt little Niecy here to the hospital where

little Niecy here to the hospital where

little Niecy here to the hospital where Dr Lloyd was able to reattach that bit

Dr Lloyd was able to reattach that bit

Dr Lloyd was able to reattach that bit off tongue but all that blood just

off tongue but all that blood just

off tongue but all that blood just ruined Evelyn's brand new y carpet

ruined Evelyn's brand new y carpet

ruined Evelyn's brand new y carpet indoor outdoor but Evelyn says that the

indoor outdoor but Evelyn says that the

indoor outdoor but Evelyn says that the good news is the doctors say that Aunt

good news is the doctors say that Aunt

good news is the doctors say that Aunt little Niecy will speak again with

little Niecy will speak again with

little Niecy will speak again with speech therapy which in my humble

speech therapy which in my humble

speech therapy which in my humble opinion is not good news because that

opinion is not good news because that

opinion is not good news because that crazy old bat never [ __ ] shuts up and

crazy old bat never [ __ ] shuts up and

crazy old bat never [ __ ] shuts up and I strongly believe that Evelyn will

I strongly believe that Evelyn will

I strongly believe that Evelyn will regret packing that tongue on ice what

regret packing that tongue on ice what

regret packing that tongue on ice what does Evelyn have on you anyway well it

does Evelyn have on you anyway well it

does Evelyn have on you anyway well it has to do with her witnessing a

has to do with her witnessing a

has to do with her witnessing a Justified crime that I was an accomplice

Justified crime that I was an accomplice

Justified crime that I was an accomplice to years ago involving a goat oh my God

to years ago involving a goat oh my God

to years ago involving a goat oh my God was it sexual no

was it sexual no

was it sexual no and that is all you need to know well

and that is all you need to know well

and that is all you need to know well Evelyn was just plain stupid buying that

Evelyn was just plain stupid buying that

Evelyn was just plain stupid buying that white carpet but la banda

white carpet but la banda

white carpet but la banda honey I'm desperate I need

she's throwing things I gotta go get me

what took you so long did you bring me

what took you so long did you bring me

what took you so long did you bring me my payday and my flamingo pink little

my payday and my flamingo pink little

my payday and my flamingo pink little stick I mean the nurses the orderlies

stick I mean the nurses the orderlies

stick I mean the nurses the orderlies the new preacher they had to look at me

the new preacher they had to look at me

the new preacher they had to look at me all day without my lips on yes ma'am I'm

all day without my lips on yes ma'am I'm

all day without my lips on yes ma'am I'm sorry oh just give me my lipstick if I'm

sorry oh just give me my lipstick if I'm

sorry oh just give me my lipstick if I'm going to die I want to look presentable

going to die I want to look presentable

going to die I want to look presentable oh just cremate me I mean you would

oh just cremate me I mean you would

oh just cremate me I mean you would never be able to do these eyebrows mama

never be able to do these eyebrows mama

never be able to do these eyebrows mama you are not going to die

you are not going to die

you are not going to die stomach cancer runs in this family

stomach cancer runs in this family

stomach cancer runs in this family you're probably going to die of it too

you're probably going to die of it too

you're probably going to die of it too just give me my lipstick and my payday

just give me my lipstick and my payday

just give me my lipstick and my payday okay oh there it is okay payday payday

okay oh there it is okay payday payday

okay oh there it is okay payday payday good lipstick

good lipstick

good lipstick and quit eating you'll never get another

and quit eating you'll never get another

and quit eating you'll never get another manager's size Mama I'm a size 10.

manager's size Mama I'm a size 10.

manager's size Mama I'm a size 10. in what country

I'm not gonna let you push my buttons

I'm not gonna let you push my buttons

I'm not gonna let you push my buttons mama you may have installed them but I

mama you may have installed them but I

mama you may have installed them but I am not going to let you push him I heard

am not going to let you push him I heard

am not going to let you push him I heard that um Oprah's life classes oh shut up

that um Oprah's life classes oh shut up

that um Oprah's life classes oh shut up Oprah's full of [ __ ]

Oprah's full of [ __ ]

Oprah's full of [ __ ] now if you'll excuse me I am going to

now if you'll excuse me I am going to

now if you'll excuse me I am going to see if they have your pending test back

see if they have your pending test back

see if they have your pending test back to see how much longer I'm going to have

to see how much longer I'm going to have

to see how much longer I'm going to have to put up with this [ __ ] which Oprah is

to put up with this [ __ ] which Oprah is

to put up with this [ __ ] which Oprah is not full of

no yelling in the hallways are sick

no yelling in the hallways are sick

no yelling in the hallways are sick people in here didn't your mother teach

people in here didn't your mother teach

people in here didn't your mother teach you to be considerate no ma'am she just

you to be considerate no ma'am she just

you to be considerate no ma'am she just taught me to feel inferior and worthless

taught me to feel inferior and worthless

taught me to feel inferior and worthless trash

hey there pretty lady could you come in

hey there pretty lady could you come in

hey there pretty lady could you come in here

here

here me well I don't see no other privilege

me well I don't see no other privilege

me well I don't see no other privilege nearby

nearby

nearby hey would you be an angel and hand me

hey would you be an angel and hand me

hey would you be an angel and hand me them crutches over there God damn mean

them crutches over there God damn mean

them crutches over there God damn mean nurse helped me to this chair and told

nurse helped me to this chair and told

nurse helped me to this chair and told me she'd be back in 30 minutes been over

me she'd be back in 30 minutes been over

me she'd be back in 30 minutes been over an hour oh damn Nation

an hour oh damn Nation

an hour oh damn Nation your bird

your bird

your bird well I don't see no wedding ring no no

well I don't see no wedding ring no no

well I don't see no wedding ring no no more no rain I pawned it after my

more no rain I pawned it after my

more no rain I pawned it after my divorce 17 years ago same

divorce 17 years ago same

divorce 17 years ago same see my husband had an affair on me with

see my husband had an affair on me with

see my husband had an affair on me with my best friend's 70 year old mother and

my best friend's 70 year old mother and

my best friend's 70 year old mother and our friendship survived but the marriage

our friendship survived but the marriage

our friendship survived but the marriage did not my friend lavonda oh that that's

did not my friend lavonda oh that that's

did not my friend lavonda oh that that's Peggy's daughter Peggy is the old

Peggy's daughter Peggy is the old

Peggy's daughter Peggy is the old adulterating dead woman is sitting in

adulterating dead woman is sitting in

adulterating dead woman is sitting in that room across from you with Evelyn

that room across from you with Evelyn

that room across from you with Evelyn crawleys ain't lonely see my aunt Lil

crawleys ain't lonely see my aunt Lil

crawleys ain't lonely see my aunt Lil Niecy is crazy as a sack full of

Niecy is crazy as a sack full of

Niecy is crazy as a sack full of [ __ ] bless her heart and I'm here

[ __ ] bless her heart and I'm here

[ __ ] bless her heart and I'm here visiting my mama who either has stomach

visiting my mama who either has stomach

visiting my mama who either has stomach cancer or severe case of tomate I mean

cancer or severe case of tomate I mean

cancer or severe case of tomate I mean we're praying that it's domain but she

we're praying that it's domain but she

we're praying that it's domain but she is so damn mean sometimes I just wish

is so damn mean sometimes I just wish

is so damn mean sometimes I just wish she would die oh shoot I meant to just

she would die oh shoot I meant to just

she would die oh shoot I meant to just think that my husband GW well my

think that my husband GW well my

think that my husband GW well my ex-husband now 17 years no ring Sango he

ex-husband now 17 years no ring Sango he

ex-husband now 17 years no ring Sango he is a Vietnam vet and he has two wooden

is a Vietnam vet and he has two wooden

is a Vietnam vet and he has two wooden legs well technically they're fiberglass

legs well technically they're fiberglass

legs well technically they're fiberglass and one day I got real mad and I took

and one day I got real mad and I took

and one day I got real mad and I took one of them legs and I bashed in all the

one of them legs and I bashed in all the

one of them legs and I bashed in all the windows on his pickup truck while he was

windows on his pickup truck while he was

windows on his pickup truck while he was taking a bath not a pretty sight with

taking a bath not a pretty sight with

taking a bath not a pretty sight with them stubs years ago then I set them

them stubs years ago then I set them

them stubs years ago then I set them legs on fire in the bed of his pickup

legs on fire in the bed of his pickup

legs on fire in the bed of his pickup truck vans as I was so upset after

truck vans as I was so upset after

truck vans as I was so upset after Peggy's funeral you know about that fair

Peggy's funeral you know about that fair

Peggy's funeral you know about that fair not her her death but first I soaked

not her her death but first I soaked

not her her death but first I soaked them legs in gasoline because I think

them legs in gasoline because I think

them legs in gasoline because I think that [ __ ] through tossed in a match boom

that [ __ ] through tossed in a match boom

that [ __ ] through tossed in a match boom it's hard to make a marriage work after

it's hard to make a marriage work after

it's hard to make a marriage work after that

that

that remind me never to piss you off Okay I

remind me never to piss you off Okay I

remind me never to piss you off Okay I uh I don't mean to make it

uh I don't mean to make it

uh I don't mean to make it what happened to your leg

what happened to your leg

what happened to your leg well I crossed you're working on norig

well I crossed you're working on norig

well I crossed you're working on norig uh

uh

uh my crutches oh Ryan sorry okay here you

my crutches oh Ryan sorry okay here you

my crutches oh Ryan sorry okay here you go thank you

go thank you

go thank you hey will you get behind me put both

hey will you get behind me put both

hey will you get behind me put both their hands around my waist and give me

their hands around my waist and give me

their hands around my waist and give me a show up okay

don't look at my ass

uh here we go okay it worked my buddy

uh here we go okay it worked my buddy

uh here we go okay it worked my buddy Hank's supposed to bring me some sweats

Hank's supposed to bring me some sweats

Hank's supposed to bring me some sweats but are you looking at my ass no well

but are you looking at my ass no well

but are you looking at my ass no well maybe just a little good

come Lord Jesus

come Lord Jesus

come Lord Jesus the grace of the Lord Jesus be with all

the grace of the Lord Jesus be with all

the grace of the Lord Jesus be with all amen

best in and if you ask me

Corner Stop where Jesus is Alive and

Corner Stop where Jesus is Alive and

Corner Stop where Jesus is Alive and Well and everything is convenient this

Well and everything is convenient this

Well and everything is convenient this is Vera how may I help you

is Vera how may I help you

is Vera how may I help you hello Mary

hello Mary

hello Mary well I just now finished reading the

well I just now finished reading the

well I just now finished reading the entire Bible

entire Bible

entire Bible I've been dealing with brother boy this

I've been dealing with brother boy this

I've been dealing with brother boy this morning

morning

morning more troubles in Christ on Cross mail

more troubles in Christ on Cross mail

more troubles in Christ on Cross mail bless his heart I've been praying for

bless his heart I've been praying for

bless his heart I've been praying for Jesus to turn him straight well Vera I

Jesus to turn him straight well Vera I

Jesus to turn him straight well Vera I think that perhaps that is a wasted

think that perhaps that is a wasted

think that perhaps that is a wasted prayer if you have faith the size of a

prayer if you have faith the size of a

prayer if you have faith the size of a mustard seed you can say to a mulberry

mustard seed you can say to a mulberry

mustard seed you can say to a mulberry tree be uprooted and be planted in the

tree be uprooted and be planted in the

tree be uprooted and be planted in the sea that's in Luke

sea that's in Luke

sea that's in Luke hi Leticia you're mixing up the sweet

hi Leticia you're mixing up the sweet

hi Leticia you're mixing up the sweet spots of chili Doritos with the spicy

spots of chili Doritos with the spicy

spots of chili Doritos with the spicy nachos again yes Vira

[Music]

that's one of my favorites why do you

that's one of my favorites why do you

that's one of my favorites why do you think anybody would want to uproot a

think anybody would want to uproot a

think anybody would want to uproot a mulberry tree and plant it in the sea

mulberry tree and plant it in the sea

mulberry tree and plant it in the sea how would they pick their mulberries

how would they pick their mulberries

how would they pick their mulberries hmm

hmm

hmm some things in the Bible that just do

some things in the Bible that just do

some things in the Bible that just do not make a wicked sense to me well I

not make a wicked sense to me well I

not make a wicked sense to me well I live by the Bible [ __ ] I don't need it

live by the Bible [ __ ] I don't need it

live by the Bible [ __ ] I don't need it to make sense now I'm going to need you

to make sense now I'm going to need you

to make sense now I'm going to need you on my anti-quality calling committee the

on my anti-quality calling committee the

on my anti-quality calling committee the Revival starts tomorrow we got to get

Revival starts tomorrow we got to get

Revival starts tomorrow we got to get the final word out they're coming for

the final word out they're coming for

the final word out they're coming for our religious freedoms and good

our religious freedoms and good

our religious freedoms and good Christians are being persecuted by who

Christians are being persecuted by who

Christians are being persecuted by who Obama Hillary Clinton five liberal

Obama Hillary Clinton five liberal

Obama Hillary Clinton five liberal judges and Miley Cyrus

oh Lord there I gotta go oops Latrell

oh Lord there I gotta go oops Latrell

oh Lord there I gotta go oops Latrell [Music]

well you're just never gonna believe

well you're just never gonna believe

well you're just never gonna believe what the church is doing you just want

what the church is doing you just want

what the church is doing you just want their time have any anti-quality Revival

their time have any anti-quality Revival

their time have any anti-quality Revival that's what they're calling it starts

that's what they're calling it starts

that's what they're calling it starts tomorrow I just met the new preacher

tomorrow I just met the new preacher

tomorrow I just met the new preacher Jimmy Ray Bruton handsome

Jimmy Ray Bruton handsome

Jimmy Ray Bruton handsome very argumentative well you know all

very argumentative well you know all

very argumentative well you know all about that

about that

about that it's not always a bad thing

it's not always a bad thing

it's not always a bad thing I want to just hung up from time he and

I want to just hung up from time he and

I want to just hung up from time he and Kyle may be moving to death

Kyle may be moving to death

Kyle may be moving to death Kyle's got a big designer job offer from

Kyle's got a big designer job offer from

Kyle's got a big designer job offer from Mitchell Gold Bob Williams Furniture

Mitchell Gold Bob Williams Furniture

Mitchell Gold Bob Williams Furniture Store very upscale

Store very upscale

Store very upscale high end

high end

high end gorgeous

gorgeous

gorgeous maybe you can get some free furniture

oh the baker news

oh the baker news

oh the baker news the boys are having twins oh twins I got

the boys are having twins oh twins I got

the boys are having twins oh twins I got a deal

what's wrong with my furniture

a Banda

a Banda

a Banda la banda

la banda

la banda this is hardy hardy this is lavonda

this is hardy hardy this is lavonda

this is hardy hardy this is lavonda Hardy's new in town and who are you the

Hardy's new in town and who are you the

Hardy's new in town and who are you the Welcome Wagon

Welcome Wagon

Welcome Wagon are you two smoking in the hospital yeah

are you two smoking in the hospital yeah

are you two smoking in the hospital yeah we were smoking we gotta go I'm gonna be

we were smoking we gotta go I'm gonna be

we were smoking we gotta go I'm gonna be late for work done here okay

late for work done here okay

late for work done here okay why don't anything good like this ever

why don't anything good like this ever

why don't anything good like this ever happen to my life did you see the size

happen to my life did you see the size

happen to my life did you see the size of his feet I sure did come on

of his feet I sure did come on

of his feet I sure did come on foreign

do their business in a cup instead of a

do their business in a cup instead of a

do their business in a cup instead of a sock

sock

sock and it goes to some science lab where it

and it goes to some science lab where it

and it goes to some science lab where it then fertilizes some stray woman's eggs

then fertilizes some stray woman's eggs

then fertilizes some stray woman's eggs that they choose from a book of donors

that they choose from a book of donors

that they choose from a book of donors then fertilized eggs are put into the

then fertilized eggs are put into the

then fertilized eggs are put into the surrogate's uterus that will then carry

surrogate's uterus that will then carry

surrogate's uterus that will then carry the babies it was very scientific

the babies it was very scientific

the babies it was very scientific lordy lordy the things they can do these

lordy lordy the things they can do these

lordy lordy the things they can do these days they use this agency called growing

days they use this agency called growing

days they use this agency called growing Generations that did everything put

Generations that did everything put

Generations that did everything put everything together

everything together

everything together and that oldest Winkler girl just had

and that oldest Winkler girl just had

and that oldest Winkler girl just had her fourth baby out of wedlock

her fourth baby out of wedlock

her fourth baby out of wedlock they could have just slipped her 20 and

they could have just slipped her 20 and

they could have just slipped her 20 and had a little white trash baby no thank

had a little white trash baby no thank

had a little white trash baby no thank you I do not want a Winkler grandchild

you I do not want a Winkler grandchild

you I do not want a Winkler grandchild no telling what's swimming in that gene

no telling what's swimming in that gene

no telling what's swimming in that gene pool

pool

pool they want it they wrong

they want it they wrong

they want it they wrong and with today's technology

and with today's technology

and with today's technology one can have their very own biological

one can have their very own biological

one can have their very own biological oh one white one and one cute little

oh one white one and one cute little

oh one white one and one cute little mulatto oh my

mulatto oh my

mulatto oh my is a girl Halle Berry is so beautiful

is a girl Halle Berry is so beautiful

is a girl Halle Berry is so beautiful [ __ ] That Word mulatto

[ __ ] That Word mulatto

[ __ ] That Word mulatto it's no longer politically correct

it's no longer politically correct

it's no longer politically correct mixed is preferred

mixed is preferred

mixed is preferred next time

next time

next time well if you say so

well if you say so

well if you say so mulatto sure has a prettier ring to it

mulatto sure has a prettier ring to it

mulatto sure has a prettier ring to it Lord and I cannot give up

Lord and I cannot give up

Lord and I cannot give up is African-American still right

is African-American still right

is African-American still right I believe so only there are some who

I believe so only there are some who

I believe so only there are some who don't care for that either

don't care for that either

don't care for that either oh I cannot wait to tell me life crashes

oh I cannot wait to tell me life crashes

oh I cannot wait to tell me life crashes well so niggy's gonna be your grandpa

I am a Christian Lord but I'm a woman

I am a Christian Lord but I'm a woman

I am a Christian Lord but I'm a woman too finish Tammy and then I gotta get

too finish Tammy and then I gotta get

too finish Tammy and then I gotta get into the Loretta

into the Loretta

into the Loretta velcro girl

velcro girl

velcro girl that'll solve this [ __ ]

that'll solve this [ __ ]

that'll solve this [ __ ] hello

hello

hello we're not open yet

we're not open yet

we're not open yet you were the pathetic freak you can kiss

you were the pathetic freak you can kiss

you were the pathetic freak you can kiss your precious Tammy goodbye cause it

your precious Tammy goodbye cause it

your precious Tammy goodbye cause it ain't all working no don't wake up to

ain't all working no don't wake up to

ain't all working no don't wake up to eight I

okay

okay

okay oh yes man appearance

oh yes man appearance

oh yes man appearance working on the transition from Tammy

working on the transition from Tammy

working on the transition from Tammy into Loretta

into Loretta

into Loretta it's part of the skit I come up with

it's part of the skit I come up with

it's part of the skit I come up with The Big Show is Loretta Tammy Dolly we

The Big Show is Loretta Tammy Dolly we

The Big Show is Loretta Tammy Dolly we three queens of Opry are

three queens of Opry are

three queens of Opry are how about you be a good little girl and

how about you be a good little girl and

how about you be a good little girl and pour me a strong drink we ain't open yet

it's gonna kill me I'm gonna be late for

it's gonna kill me I'm gonna be late for

it's gonna kill me I'm gonna be late for work

work

work let's do the ride boy now and those

let's do the ride boy now and those

let's do the ride boy now and those beautiful princess William and Harry

beautiful princess William and Harry

beautiful princess William and Harry were left motherless and I will never

were left motherless and I will never

were left motherless and I will never forgive Camilla Parker Bowles oh who

forgive Camilla Parker Bowles oh who

forgive Camilla Parker Bowles oh who gives us [ __ ] Juanita Queen Elizabeth

gives us [ __ ] Juanita Queen Elizabeth

gives us [ __ ] Juanita Queen Elizabeth tragic Juanita

tragic Juanita

tragic Juanita hey GW O'Dell hi Wardell hi Bonnie are

hey GW O'Dell hi Wardell hi Bonnie are

hey GW O'Dell hi Wardell hi Bonnie are y'all doing all this for my mama yep

y'all doing all this for my mama yep

y'all doing all this for my mama yep and I'd like for you to come tomorrow

and I'd like for you to come tomorrow

and I'd like for you to come tomorrow night is my date for Old Times Sake

night is my date for Old Times Sake

night is my date for Old Times Sake I think I'd like that yeah

I think I'd like that yeah

I think I'd like that yeah I'm oral

I'm oral

I'm oral folks just call me

folks just call me

folks just call me brother boy

brother boy

brother boy name I'm Billy Joe

name I'm Billy Joe

name I'm Billy Joe and up on the smoke why don't you like

and up on the smoke why don't you like

and up on the smoke why don't you like two at once

two at once

two at once sorry they're kind of girly

sorry they're kind of girly

sorry they're kind of girly I'm bisexual

I'm bisexual

I'm bisexual I'd send them a feminine side oh

I'd send them a feminine side oh

I'd send them a feminine side oh bisexual huh

what just wanted to pass a howdy what's

what just wanted to pass a howdy what's

what just wanted to pass a howdy what's up

up

up well Mama's in the hospital either

well Mama's in the hospital either

well Mama's in the hospital either stomach cancer or tomane and she told me

stomach cancer or tomane and she told me

stomach cancer or tomane and she told me I'd never get another man at my size

I'd never get another man at my size

I'd never get another man at my size then right after she said that I got

then right after she said that I got

then right after she said that I got laid by a younger man hot as hell with

laid by a younger man hot as hell with

laid by a younger man hot as hell with both legs in a hospital bed mama was

both legs in a hospital bed mama was

both legs in a hospital bed mama was wrong

wrong

wrong so what's up with ugw staying busy

5209 5209 5209 5209

5209 5209 5209 5209

5209 5209 5209 5209 5209

5209

5209 5209 5209

5209 5209

5209 5209 5209 and 5209

5209 and 5209

5209 and 5209 will there be anything else

for that I can't even afford to eat

for that I can't even afford to eat

for that I can't even afford to eat anymore have you given any more thought

anymore have you given any more thought

anymore have you given any more thought to being on my anti-quality calling

to being on my anti-quality calling

to being on my anti-quality calling committee

committee

committee she buy me this Baby Ruth I had a

she buy me this Baby Ruth I had a

she buy me this Baby Ruth I had a craving for something sweet well hello

craving for something sweet well hello

craving for something sweet well hello Latrell

Latrell

Latrell I heard that your ex-husband has been

I heard that your ex-husband has been

I heard that your ex-husband has been shacking up with a much much younger

shacking up with a much much younger

shacking up with a much much younger more beautiful woman in your former mini

more beautiful woman in your former mini

more beautiful woman in your former mini mansion that you lost in the divorce

mansion that you lost in the divorce

mansion that you lost in the divorce over in San Angelo how you hold tonight

over in San Angelo how you hold tonight

over in San Angelo how you hold tonight I'm fine Vera thanks well you've been on

I'm fine Vera thanks well you've been on

I'm fine Vera thanks well you've been on my prayer list ever since your husband

my prayer list ever since your husband

my prayer list ever since your husband ran off with that mulatto IHOP waitress

ran off with that mulatto IHOP waitress

ran off with that mulatto IHOP waitress prayers mean so much mulatto is no

prayers mean so much mulatto is no

prayers mean so much mulatto is no longer politically correct Vera they

longer politically correct Vera they

longer politically correct Vera they prefer mixed these days and I've been

prefer mixed these days and I've been

prefer mixed these days and I've been praying for you when you're struggled

praying for you when you're struggled

praying for you when you're struggled with obesity and gluttony too

with obesity and gluttony too

with obesity and gluttony too we have faith you can move from Mountain

go dead that's the saucer you'll be

go dead that's the saucer you'll be

go dead that's the saucer you'll be looking for new trabajo

looking for new trabajo

looking for new trabajo I don't speak Mexican

I don't speak Mexican

I don't speak Mexican and I am not a glutton I have glandular

and I am not a glutton I have glandular

and I am not a glutton I have glandular problems oh there are his struggled so

problems oh there are his struggled so

problems oh there are his struggled so with her white battle ever since we were

with her white battle ever since we were

with her white battle ever since we were kids Dr Oz says it's a disease just like

kids Dr Oz says it's a disease just like

kids Dr Oz says it's a disease just like being an alcoholic well then perhaps

being an alcoholic well then perhaps

being an alcoholic well then perhaps it's time for you to get sober

it's time for you to get sober

it's time for you to get sober people don't like you Latrell

people don't like you Latrell

people don't like you Latrell it's the one thing we have in common

it's the one thing we have in common

it's the one thing we have in common Vera

Vera

Vera come on [ __ ]

I know what that teardrop tattoo means

I know what that teardrop tattoo means

I know what that teardrop tattoo means it means you've been in the Pokey ugh

it means you've been in the Pokey ugh

it means you've been in the Pokey ugh damn I needed that I'm about a real bad

damn I needed that I'm about a real bad

damn I needed that I'm about a real bad day

day

day you know who I am

you know who I am

you know who I am um

um

um should are you famous

should are you famous

should are you famous my precious precious Tammy was famous

my precious precious Tammy was famous

my precious precious Tammy was famous it was her blessing in her curse

I'm just a lost soul roaming the

I'm just a lost soul roaming the

I'm just a lost soul roaming the highways

highways

highways no well that's probably

no well that's probably

no well that's probably you know I like the way you look

you know I like the way you look

you know I like the way you look rough

rough

rough rough trade rough trade

rough trade rough trade

rough trade rough trade yeah I'm rough all right

yeah I'm rough all right

yeah I'm rough all right you know why they call it the Pokey

you might like to get poked in the Poke

you might like to get poked in the Poke

you might like to get poked in the Poke oh you shut up

be right back

be right back

be right back forgot something in my truck

oh I have my question though

oh I have my question though

oh I have my question though but I'm alone too

but I'm alone too

but I'm alone too boom boom boom

boom boom boom

boom boom boom hello

hello

hello [Music]

Billy Joe

Billy Joe

Billy Joe what the hell is all this

what the hell is all this

what the hell is all this well hello Marty it's nice to be greeted

well hello Marty it's nice to be greeted

well hello Marty it's nice to be greeted by such a rare Sunshine

by such a rare Sunshine

by such a rare Sunshine shut up who the hell is Billy Joe my

shut up who the hell is Billy Joe my

shut up who the hell is Billy Joe my imaginary friend who watches me rehearse

imaginary friend who watches me rehearse

imaginary friend who watches me rehearse you are certifiable when the hell are

you are certifiable when the hell are

you are certifiable when the hell are you gonna learn this is not working okay

you gonna learn this is not working okay

you gonna learn this is not working okay no okay and if you can't perform some

no okay and if you can't perform some

no okay and if you can't perform some new material and not the tired old [ __ ]

new material and not the tired old [ __ ]

new material and not the tired old [ __ ] from the has been dead and it has been

from the has been dead and it has been

from the has been dead and it has been almost dead then you leave me no choice

almost dead then you leave me no choice

almost dead then you leave me no choice but to fire you're prissy and talented

but to fire you're prissy and talented

but to fire you're prissy and talented ass Loretta and Dolly are not almost

ass Loretta and Dolly are not almost

ass Loretta and Dolly are not almost dead and they're certainly not has bands

dead and they're certainly not has bands

dead and they're certainly not has bands no one that's dead and she

no one that's dead and she

no one that's dead and she is certainly will never be a house

anymore

anymore

anymore I was chosen I don't think you're

I was chosen I don't think you're

I was chosen I don't think you're capable of even understanding that kind

capable of even understanding that kind

capable of even understanding that kind of commitment and obligation so why

of commitment and obligation so why

of commitment and obligation so why don't you just settle on back to

don't you just settle on back to

don't you just settle on back to Singapore I'm Filipino born in Cleveland

Singapore I'm Filipino born in Cleveland

Singapore I'm Filipino born in Cleveland when I was in the looney bin at Big

when I was in the looney bin at Big

when I was in the looney bin at Big Sprites famous Ghost came to me now

Sprites famous Ghost came to me now

Sprites famous Ghost came to me now for me oh I cannot hear that Cocker made

for me oh I cannot hear that Cocker made

for me oh I cannot hear that Cocker made me [ __ ] country Legend ghost story

me [ __ ] country Legend ghost story

me [ __ ] country Legend ghost story again you own a mental institution for a

again you own a mental institution for a

again you own a mental institution for a reason okay Case Closed

reason okay Case Closed

reason okay Case Closed Martina oh no no

Martina oh no no

Martina oh no no but I haven't planted that little

but I haven't planted that little

but I haven't planted that little surprise visit I want Wilson to be

surprise visit I want Wilson to be

surprise visit I want Wilson to be filled with regret the moment he sees me

filled with regret the moment he sees me

filled with regret the moment he sees me African-American Asian mix Roger I'm so

African-American Asian mix Roger I'm so

African-American Asian mix Roger I'm so so sorry that I'm like but someone came

so sorry that I'm like but someone came

so sorry that I'm like but someone came up and it was hard for her to get away I

up and it was hard for her to get away I

up and it was hard for her to get away I know Lita hi Latrell hey it's always

know Lita hi Latrell hey it's always

know Lita hi Latrell hey it's always something oh it was something all right

something oh it was something all right

something oh it was something all right well I guess I missed whatever the

well I guess I missed whatever the

well I guess I missed whatever the something was no later could you fix my

something was no later could you fix my

something was no later could you fix my French manicure please Focus this time

French manicure please Focus this time

French manicure please Focus this time on it

on it

on it you've been missing that something your

you've been missing that something your

you've been missing that something your entire life Latrell Ally Canton has

entire life Latrell Ally Canton has

entire life Latrell Ally Canton has never been my forte

never been my forte

never been my forte or like some Hells Bells Latrell my

or like some Hells Bells Latrell my

or like some Hells Bells Latrell my alley cat and ears are a distant memory

alley cat and ears are a distant memory

alley cat and ears are a distant memory and there was only one old cowboy that

and there was only one old cowboy that

and there was only one old cowboy that ever did anything for me in the first

ever did anything for me in the first

ever did anything for me in the first place

I'd never have another [ __ ] orgasm in

I'd never have another [ __ ] orgasm in

I'd never have another [ __ ] orgasm in I'll buy you one for Christmas Latrell

I'll buy you one for Christmas Latrell

I'll buy you one for Christmas Latrell well wait my birthday's next month

well wait my birthday's next month

well wait my birthday's next month and this folks is the perfect example

and this folks is the perfect example

and this folks is the perfect example that people can change [ __ ]

that people can change [ __ ]

that people can change [ __ ] you want a rabbit no ma'am I do not like

you want a rabbit no ma'am I do not like

you want a rabbit no ma'am I do not like rodents don't make me do Carrie

rodents don't make me do Carrie

rodents don't make me do Carrie Underwood

Underwood

Underwood or Blake Shelton's formerly fleshy

or Blake Shelton's formerly fleshy

or Blake Shelton's formerly fleshy ex-wife or that Butch one from Sugar

ex-wife or that Butch one from Sugar

ex-wife or that Butch one from Sugar Land I can't do it already I just can't

Land I can't do it already I just can't

Land I can't do it already I just can't you will if I say you will no no no Dr

you will if I say you will no no no Dr

you will if I say you will no no no Dr Eve get out of my head stop just go go

Eve get out of my head stop just go go

Eve get out of my head stop just go go go go go go go no no I'm not going

go go go go go no no I'm not going

go go go go go no no I'm not going anywhere I need a new boss the one who

anywhere I need a new boss the one who

anywhere I need a new boss the one who had no say in hiring you but can sure

had no say in hiring you but can sure

had no say in hiring you but can sure [ __ ] fire you so come up with a new act

[ __ ] fire you so come up with a new act

[ __ ] fire you so come up with a new act or you can hang up your tired tattered

or you can hang up your tired tattered

or you can hang up your tired tattered heels apologize to the lady

heels apologize to the lady

heels apologize to the lady who are you what are you doing in here

who are you what are you doing in here

who are you what are you doing in here [ __ ] you excuse me who the hell do you

[ __ ] you excuse me who the hell do you

[ __ ] you excuse me who the hell do you think you're talking to I'm talking to

think you're talking to I'm talking to

think you're talking to I'm talking to you [ __ ] now apologize to the lady or

you [ __ ] now apologize to the lady or

you [ __ ] now apologize to the lady or you have me to [ __ ] deal with all

you have me to [ __ ] deal with all

you have me to [ __ ] deal with all right you have 10 seconds to leave this

right you have 10 seconds to leave this

right you have 10 seconds to leave this bar before I call the police to have

bar before I call the police to have

bar before I call the police to have your dumb redneck white trash ass

your dumb redneck white trash ass

your dumb redneck white trash ass arrested all right then oh my God that's

arrested all right then oh my God that's

arrested all right then oh my God that's the Escape he's like a burger

you just shot at the wrong person

go you'll splatter blood on my costumes

go you'll splatter blood on my costumes

go you'll splatter blood on my costumes and I've worked so hard on them you're

and I've worked so hard on them you're

and I've worked so hard on them you're gonna be [ __ ] me no I'm not [ __ ]

gonna be [ __ ] me no I'm not [ __ ]

gonna be [ __ ] me no I'm not [ __ ] you blood and splattered brines is so

you blood and splattered brines is so

you blood and splattered brines is so messy blood will not come out of chiffon

messy blood will not come out of chiffon

messy blood will not come out of chiffon she's right about that no

she's right about that no

she's right about that no I made a Billy Joe don't you kill him

all right then

this

so I will come back here and slice you

so I will come back here and slice you

so I will come back here and slice you from your [ __ ] to your appetite got

from your [ __ ] to your appetite got

from your [ __ ] to your appetite got it hey dude this never happened

well I guess so

well I guess so

well I guess so under the circumstances my options are

under the circumstances my options are

under the circumstances my options are rather Limited

oh good lord

oh good lord

oh good lord oh my God I wish you would look at

oh my God I wish you would look at

oh my God I wish you would look at Olvera

Olvera

Olvera oh I guess a life committed to riding a

oh I guess a life committed to riding a

oh I guess a life committed to riding a scooter is better than going on a diet

scooter is better than going on a diet

scooter is better than going on a diet you know some people just don't care

you know some people just don't care

you know some people just don't care about their health

about their health

about their health [Music]

[Music]

[Music] now I've got a good man goal there and

now I've got a good man goal there and

now I've got a good man goal there and knock them off that scooter and Claw

knock them off that scooter and Claw

knock them off that scooter and Claw them to death with that [ __ ] Hammer

them to death with that [ __ ] Hammer

them to death with that [ __ ] Hammer Roger hunt you don't mean that murder is

Roger hunt you don't mean that murder is

Roger hunt you don't mean that murder is never a good option I have just been

never a good option I have just been

never a good option I have just been beaten down all my life by the Bible

beaten down all my life by the Bible

beaten down all my life by the Bible and at some point

and at some point

and at some point there are no more cheeks to turn and no

there are no more cheeks to turn and no

there are no more cheeks to turn and no more [ __ ] to give

her sling disabled she cannot be trusty

her sling disabled she cannot be trusty

her sling disabled she cannot be trusty come on come on get in here she's not

come on come on get in here she's not

come on come on get in here she's not Southern happy Ian God jeez what is all

Southern happy Ian God jeez what is all

Southern happy Ian God jeez what is all that it's my stand for my show now let's

that it's my stand for my show now let's

that it's my stand for my show now let's go

go

go goodbye

goodbye

goodbye [Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause] hell ass Billy Joe

hell ass Billy Joe

hell ass Billy Joe lady you sit so good that all of you are

lady you sit so good that all of you are

lady you sit so good that all of you are here together

here together

here together we really want you to come to our

we really want you to come to our

we really want you to come to our Revival

Revival

Revival I cannot be on your anti-quality calling

I cannot be on your anti-quality calling

I cannot be on your anti-quality calling committee [ __ ] you don't believe in

committee [ __ ] you don't believe in

committee [ __ ] you don't believe in equality do you I most certainly do

equality do you I most certainly do

equality do you I most certainly do what's going on [ __ ] believes in

what's going on [ __ ] believes in

what's going on [ __ ] believes in equality now hell then you don't believe

equality now hell then you don't believe

equality now hell then you don't believe the Bible and you're not right with your

the Bible and you're not right with your

the Bible and you're not right with your maker Jesus spoke to us he said no

maker Jesus spoke to us he said no

maker Jesus spoke to us he said no service to the gays no cakes no flowers

service to the gays no cakes no flowers

service to the gays no cakes no flowers no photos and nobody to perform the

no photos and nobody to perform the

no photos and nobody to perform the weddings no gay marriage ever ever

Jesus is speaking to me too right here

Jesus is speaking to me too right here

Jesus is speaking to me too right here and now and the voice that I'm hearing

and now and the voice that I'm hearing

and now and the voice that I'm hearing is telling me

is telling me

is telling me what's he saying he's telling me

what's he saying he's telling me

what's he saying he's telling me that he never said debt to you and that

that he never said debt to you and that

that he never said debt to you and that you're a liar and a wolf in sheep's

you're a liar and a wolf in sheep's

you're a liar and a wolf in sheep's clothing a very large stop your fat

clothing a very large stop your fat

clothing a very large stop your fat shaming lavanda

shaming lavanda

shaming lavanda has nothing to do with what's on the

has nothing to do with what's on the

has nothing to do with what's on the outside but

outside but

outside but the awfulness inside these two

the awfulness inside these two

the awfulness inside these two Hypocrites what has gotten into you

Hypocrites what has gotten into you

Hypocrites what has gotten into you [ __ ] you're hurting my feelings love

and compassion

and compassion

and compassion wasn't that

wasn't that

wasn't that Christ's real message

Christ's real message

Christ's real message and now I'm using my heart

and now I'm using my heart

and now I'm using my heart and the intelligence the good Lord give

and the intelligence the good Lord give

and the intelligence the good Lord give me to figure things out for myself well

me to figure things out for myself well

me to figure things out for myself well I'm not

I'm not

I'm not I didn't say that right no fear and

I didn't say that right no fear and

I didn't say that right no fear and nothing you say is right

nothing you say is right

nothing you say is right come on Latrell head over to San Angelo

come on Latrell head over to San Angelo

come on Latrell head over to San Angelo so we can tell your [ __ ] ex-husband

so we can tell your [ __ ] ex-husband

so we can tell your [ __ ] ex-husband off because I'm on a roll and whoo

off because I'm on a roll and whoo

off because I'm on a roll and whoo you are ready get out of my way

you are ready get out of my way

you are ready get out of my way foreign

foreign

foreign ers

oh Roger could you do a quick touch up

oh Roger could you do a quick touch up

oh Roger could you do a quick touch up on my hair I want to look my best for

on my hair I want to look my best for

on my hair I want to look my best for the Revival tomorrow night get your

the Revival tomorrow night get your

the Revival tomorrow night get your bacon eating Baptist asses out on my

bacon eating Baptist asses out on my

bacon eating Baptist asses out on my shop and now that the Winter's hairport

shop and now that the Winter's hairport

shop and now that the Winter's hairport is closed and Lila Walker is no longer

is closed and Lila Walker is no longer

is closed and Lila Walker is no longer the oldest living beautician in the

the oldest living beautician in the

the oldest living beautician in the entire state of Texas because she is

entire state of Texas because she is

entire state of Texas because she is dead who the [ __ ] gonna do your hair

dead who the [ __ ] gonna do your hair

dead who the [ __ ] gonna do your hair yeah [ __ ] anti-equality works both

yeah [ __ ] anti-equality works both

yeah [ __ ] anti-equality works both ways now you get the hell out of here

ways now you get the hell out of here

ways now you get the hell out of here before

this guy

[Laughter]

so where you want to go Dallas

so where you want to go Dallas

so where you want to go Dallas to the Rose Room well opportunity is

to the Rose Room well opportunity is

to the Rose Room well opportunity is rampant we're gonna need some money

rampant we're gonna need some money

rampant we're gonna need some money I'll be right back you stay put

I'll be right back you stay put

I'll be right back you stay put don't move

don't move

don't move will you get me a Coco what kind Dr

will you get me a Coco what kind Dr

will you get me a Coco what kind Dr Pepper oh and some cigs I'm down to my

Pepper oh and some cigs I'm down to my

Pepper oh and some cigs I'm down to my last 20. I should have grabbed that

last 20. I should have grabbed that

last 20. I should have grabbed that stash of tips keep it don't need it

stash of tips keep it don't need it

stash of tips keep it don't need it well for the gentleman

[Music]

foreign

I need to speak to Wilson have you ever

I need to speak to Wilson have you ever

I need to speak to Wilson have you ever heard of the telephone or email have you

heard of the telephone or email have you

heard of the telephone or email have you ever heard of age-appropriate dressing

ever heard of age-appropriate dressing

ever heard of age-appropriate dressing whatever

whatever

whatever [ __ ] perfect your ex-wife Patrice here

[ __ ] perfect your ex-wife Patrice here

[ __ ] perfect your ex-wife Patrice here look Trail

look Trail

look Trail you know it's the trail

you know it's the trail

you know it's the trail about to bust my bladder throw the

about to bust my bladder throw the

about to bust my bladder throw the [ __ ] money in a [ __ ] bag that's

[ __ ] money in a [ __ ] bag that's

[ __ ] money in a [ __ ] bag that's right [ __ ] move all the money in that

right [ __ ] move all the money in that

right [ __ ] move all the money in that [ __ ] Mac that's it right there give

[ __ ] Mac that's it right there give

[ __ ] Mac that's it right there give me the [ __ ] money give me the [ __ ]

me the [ __ ] money give me the [ __ ]

me the [ __ ] money give me the [ __ ] money or I'll put her in the [ __ ]

money or I'll put her in the [ __ ]

money or I'll put her in the [ __ ] face

face

face I'm not a bit off more than I can chill

well if I know I'm just gonna commit

well if I know I'm just gonna commit

well if I know I'm just gonna commit armed robbery I would not have won my

armed robbery I would not have won my

armed robbery I would not have won my kitten hey yo come on

foreign

foreign

foreign what the hell do you want

do you mind whatever you want to say in

do you mind whatever you want to say in

do you mind whatever you want to say in front of me you can say in front of my

front of me you can say in front of my

front of me you can say in front of my wife

wife

wife what

what

what right after my divorce is final last

right after my divorce is final last

right after my divorce is final last month and we were both free of our

month and we were both free of our

month and we were both free of our horrible past we had a simple private

horrible past we had a simple private

horrible past we had a simple private ceremony in San Antonio with a mariachi

ceremony in San Antonio with a mariachi

ceremony in San Antonio with a mariachi band it was perfect for our simple yet

band it was perfect for our simple yet

band it was perfect for our simple yet pure love

pure love

pure love well I I didn't know well what would you

well I I didn't know well what would you

well I I didn't know well what would you expect Latrell wedding invitation

expect Latrell wedding invitation

expect Latrell wedding invitation you're gonna be a grandpa Wilson what

you're gonna be a grandpa Wilson what

you're gonna be a grandpa Wilson what Ty and Kyle surrogate is pregnant with

Ty and Kyle surrogate is pregnant with

Ty and Kyle surrogate is pregnant with twins I can explain how that works if

twins I can explain how that works if

twins I can explain how that works if y'all need me to works against God's

y'all need me to works against God's

y'all need me to works against God's nature is what it does just as their

nature is what it does just as their

nature is what it does just as their relationship and their lifestyle works

relationship and their lifestyle works

relationship and their lifestyle works against God's will that's right we

against God's will that's right we

against God's will that's right we believe that God created Adam and Eve

believe that God created Adam and Eve

believe that God created Adam and Eve and not Adam and Steve that marriage is

and not Adam and Steve that marriage is

and not Adam and Steve that marriage is between a man and a woman shouldn't that

between a man and a woman shouldn't that

between a man and a woman shouldn't that be between a man his first wife and then

be between a man his first wife and then

be between a man his first wife and then a couple of trashy waitresses did she

a couple of trashy waitresses did she

a couple of trashy waitresses did she just call me trashy well if the hooker

just call me trashy well if the hooker

just call me trashy well if the hooker Hill fits and I am a singer not a

Hill fits and I am a singer not a

Hill fits and I am a singer not a waitress at the bowlerama Wilson are you

waitress at the bowlerama Wilson are you

waitress at the bowlerama Wilson are you going to allow her to talk to me like

going to allow her to talk to me like

going to allow her to talk to me like this oh wow oh honey he never had that

this oh wow oh honey he never had that

this oh wow oh honey he never had that kind of control over me Greta hun do you

kind of control over me Greta hun do you

kind of control over me Greta hun do you all believe all the Bible

this feels like a trick question we

this feels like a trick question we

this feels like a trick question we absolutely do we hate the sin but we

absolutely do we hate the sin but we

absolutely do we hate the sin but we love the sinner the trail we're going to

love the sinner the trail we're going to

love the sinner the trail we're going to need some rocks right yes hun I hate to

need some rocks right yes hun I hate to

need some rocks right yes hun I hate to inform you but the Bible is very clear

inform you but the Bible is very clear

inform you but the Bible is very clear on Stone and adulterers covered in

on Stone and adulterers covered in

on Stone and adulterers covered in several passages so I guess me and

several passages so I guess me and

several passages so I guess me and Latrell are going to have to Stone you

Latrell are going to have to Stone you

Latrell are going to have to Stone you and Wilson ooh but right here in the

and Wilson ooh but right here in the

and Wilson ooh but right here in the driveway be acceptable Cecily with these

driveway be acceptable Cecily with these

driveway be acceptable Cecily with these bricks that I lined this flower bed with

bricks that I lined this flower bed with

bricks that I lined this flower bed with well they do oh [ __ ] go on get off my

well they do oh [ __ ] go on get off my

well they do oh [ __ ] go on get off my property you are gonna be a grandpa

property you are gonna be a grandpa

property you are gonna be a grandpa Wilson our gay son is gonna be a daddy

Wilson our gay son is gonna be a daddy

Wilson our gay son is gonna be a daddy and he will parent with the gay man who

and he will parent with the gay man who

and he will parent with the gay man who he loves and is legally married to so

he loves and is legally married to so

he loves and is legally married to so get used to it stop being such a

get used to it stop being such a

get used to it stop being such a terrible father get off the property

terrible father get off the property

terrible father get off the property yeah or I'm gonna call the police the

yeah or I'm gonna call the police the

yeah or I'm gonna call the police the property you stole from me

property you stole from me

property you stole from me gladly come on [ __ ] nice to meet you

gladly come on [ __ ] nice to meet you

gladly come on [ __ ] nice to meet you Greta I am real happy we didn't have to

Greta I am real happy we didn't have to

Greta I am real happy we didn't have to Stone you

Stone you

Stone you Wilson

Wilson

Wilson good job Latrell I felt it went well

good job Latrell I felt it went well

good job Latrell I felt it went well give it to me Daddy

what

what

what I'm sorry

I'm sorry

I'm sorry we have to come up with a better way to

we have to come up with a better way to

we have to come up with a better way to talk Dirty I don't think we can use

talk Dirty I don't think we can use

talk Dirty I don't think we can use daddy like that anymore right

wow

I'm gonna be daddy's Ty

we are going to be the best and daddies

we are going to be the best and daddies

we are going to be the best and daddies God ever put on this Earth

foreign

foreign

foreign hey

bringing us down literally

talk dirty baby

talk dirty baby

talk dirty baby come on BBC my um

come on BBC my um

come on BBC my um hot

hot

hot black man

hurry up I don't want aunt little Niecy

hurry up I don't want aunt little Niecy

hurry up I don't want aunt little Niecy to see me she's become attached

to see me she's become attached

to see me she's become attached did you miss me well Canada I'm not

did you miss me well Canada I'm not

did you miss me well Canada I'm not wearing any

wearing any

wearing any uh your mama oh right test pending are

uh your mama oh right test pending are

uh your mama oh right test pending are no longer pending well if it's bad news

no longer pending well if it's bad news

no longer pending well if it's bad news you come back here and I will come for

you come back here and I will come for

you come back here and I will come for you but if it's good news you come back

you but if it's good news you come back

you but if it's good news you come back here and we'll celebrate

here and we'll celebrate

here and we'll celebrate yeah how the [ __ ] is this happening to

yeah how the [ __ ] is this happening to

yeah how the [ __ ] is this happening to you

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] we just need to hang out here a couple

we just need to hang out here a couple

we just need to hang out here a couple hours

hours

hours I feel like it's dark

I feel like it's dark

I feel like it's dark get a little sleep let things cool down

get a little sleep let things cool down

get a little sleep let things cool down then we'll take the back roads on up to

then we'll take the back roads on up to

then we'll take the back roads on up to Dallas

life of crime is so exciting

life of crime is so exciting

life of crime is so exciting I love being on the lab with you

a bear one bed

oh my God

oh my God

oh my God [Music]

[Music]

[Music] I'll give Glory keep Glory

come on

nolita

it looks like a bald naked Jesus

it looks like a bald naked Jesus

it looks like a bald naked Jesus Jesus had tattoos which he did not

Jesus had tattoos which he did not

Jesus had tattoos which he did not you don't have a snowball's chance in

you don't have a snowball's chance in

you don't have a snowball's chance in hell with this one you little monkey

hell with this one you little monkey

hell with this one you little monkey freak no

freak no

freak no even prison trash is above you you do my

even prison trash is above you you do my

even prison trash is above you you do my masturbation exercises look at these no

masturbation exercises look at these no

masturbation exercises look at these no I'm masturbate but I'm not picking you

I'm masturbate but I'm not picking you

I'm masturbate but I'm not picking you with no cargo titties I'm gonna think

with no cargo titties I'm gonna think

with no cargo titties I'm gonna think about Billy Joe guns at The Hitchhiker

about Billy Joe guns at The Hitchhiker

about Billy Joe guns at The Hitchhiker you'll think of me if I say you will no

you'll think of me if I say you will no

you'll think of me if I say you will no no go away no no

who the hell are you talking to

who the hell are you talking to

who the hell are you talking to you

you

you [Music]

[Music]

[Music] it's a

it's a

it's a silly wave

silly wave

silly wave waking you up uh beats the hell out of

waking you up uh beats the hell out of

waking you up uh beats the hell out of rise and shine give God the glory glory

rise and shine give God the glory glory

rise and shine give God the glory glory dude you are [ __ ] crazy

I like crazy

I wonder which one is the next train

foreign

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] I need you to come home

winners need you

winners need you

winners need you why don't you scare me

why don't you scare me

why don't you scare me I think my killing days are over

I think my killing days are over

I think my killing days are over maybe you can see it sad

maybe you can see it sad

maybe you can see it sad well it works in my favor

well it works in my favor

well it works in my favor come over here buddy

foreign

The Killing was all connected to sex

The Killing was all connected to sex

The Killing was all connected to sex I'm attracted to women and men just

I'm attracted to women and men just

I'm attracted to women and men just about everything

about everything

about everything except farm animals

except farm animals

except farm animals but my attraction is only for dead

but my attraction is only for dead

but my attraction is only for dead people

besides I can get this monster dick come

besides I can get this monster dick come

besides I can get this monster dick come on up no more

on up no more

on up no more days are over

days are over

days are over monster

monster

monster um where's it and

um where's it and

um where's it and you might be a killer but you ain't a

you might be a killer but you ain't a

you might be a killer but you ain't a liar

killer

I'll take full responsibility but

I'll take full responsibility but

I'll take full responsibility but I had a childhood that was like a

I had a childhood that was like a

I had a childhood that was like a goddamn horror movie

can't go there

there's just something

there's just something

there's just something they're killing

they're killing

they're killing I couldn't control

I tried

so hard

my kind ain't too popular in the big

my kind ain't too popular in the big

my kind ain't too popular in the big house

some inmates cut my nuts off okay

some inmates cut my nuts off okay

some inmates cut my nuts off okay actually numb itself yep

actually numb itself yep

actually numb itself yep and guards just stood back and laughed

and guards just stood back and laughed

and guards just stood back and laughed almost bled to death

almost bled to death

almost bled to death put him in for this

put him in for this

put him in for this big old black queer named rib eye I

big old black queer named rib eye I

big old black queer named rib eye I would

maybe that's why I like you

maybe that's why I like you

maybe that's why I like you you kind of remind me of Old River not

you kind of remind me of Old River not

you kind of remind me of Old River not what you've lost me

what you've lost me

what you've lost me oh yeah

oh yeah

oh yeah he was real real [ __ ]

he was real real [ __ ]

he was real real [ __ ] Muslim woman oh yeah well that makes

Muslim woman oh yeah well that makes

Muslim woman oh yeah well that makes complete sense

complete sense

complete sense forever I saved my life

forever I saved my life

forever I saved my life so my nut sack shut hurt like a

so my nut sack shut hurt like a

so my nut sack shut hurt like a [ __ ]

[ __ ]

[ __ ] and nursed me back to health real

and nursed me back to health real

and nursed me back to health real tenderloin

felt more love than I'd ever felt in my

felt more love than I'd ever felt in my

felt more love than I'd ever felt in my life

you didn't want sex

you didn't want sex

you didn't want sex nothing

just

let then rib eye made his maker

got into some bad drugs [ __ ] and was

got into some bad drugs [ __ ] and was

got into some bad drugs [ __ ] and was stabbed right in front of me

everybody I ever loved just

everybody I ever loved just

everybody I ever loved just these

I'm scared to die

because I know with all I've done here

because I know with all I've done here

because I know with all I've done here on this Earth I don't have no chance of

on this Earth I don't have no chance of

on this Earth I don't have no chance of going to heaven

going to heaven

going to heaven [Music]

[Music]

[Music] and we'll be burning in that Lake of

and we'll be burning in that Lake of

and we'll be burning in that Lake of Fire for eternity

Fire for eternity

Fire for eternity them for hell

so

so

so that's why I escaped

that's why I escaped

that's why I escaped say It was supposed to execute me in a

say It was supposed to execute me in a

say It was supposed to execute me in a few days I was scared shitless

so

so

so I guess

I guess

I guess in a way

in a way

in a way those are my notes was the best thing

those are my notes was the best thing

those are my notes was the best thing that could have happened to me

that could have happened to me

that could have happened to me and you

and you

and you cause if I still had my nuts I'd have

cause if I still had my nuts I'd have

cause if I still had my nuts I'd have killed you

killed you

killed you and we'd have sex which you couldn't

and we'd have sex which you couldn't

and we'd have sex which you couldn't enjoy because you would be dead but then

enjoy because you would be dead but then

enjoy because you would be dead but then I'd certainly be attracted to you

thank you

thank you

thank you sure makes me feel better about myself

sure makes me feel better about myself

sure makes me feel better about myself dear sweet Jesus this is the strangest

dear sweet Jesus this is the strangest

dear sweet Jesus this is the strangest conversation I have ever had in my

conversation I have ever had in my

conversation I have ever had in my entire life

what

foreign

in other news now Texas Attorney General

in other news now Texas Attorney General

in other news now Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton is telling County officials

Ken Paxton is telling County officials

Ken Paxton is telling County officials they can deny losers if you ask me

they can deny losers if you ask me

they can deny losers if you ask me if it conflicts with their relations

if it conflicts with their relations

if it conflicts with their relations of your mama Wardell wants me to bring

of your mama Wardell wants me to bring

of your mama Wardell wants me to bring some over to Bubba's for Mama's memorial

some over to Bubba's for Mama's memorial

some over to Bubba's for Mama's memorial service

service

service breaking news just into our Newsroom The

breaking news just into our Newsroom The

breaking news just into our Newsroom The Hitchhiker murderer Billy Joe Dobson is

Hitchhiker murderer Billy Joe Dobson is

Hitchhiker murderer Billy Joe Dobson is still on the loose but he was spotted

still on the loose but he was spotted

still on the loose but he was spotted today during what appears to be the

today during what appears to be the

today during what appears to be the kidnapping of an elderly woman now that

kidnapping of an elderly woman now that

kidnapping of an elderly woman now that hostage looks Vaguely Familiar if you

hostage looks Vaguely Familiar if you

hostage looks Vaguely Familiar if you know this woman well

this is it

this is it

this is it I'm gonna miss you

yeah I'm

yeah I'm

yeah I'm well

well

well okay

okay

okay get out

you deserved a better life

you're gonna need this

you're gonna need this

you're gonna need this plenty more where that came from thank

plenty more where that came from thank

plenty more where that came from thank you Billy child

you Billy child

you Billy child I learned something very valuable for

I learned something very valuable for

I learned something very valuable for meeting you

meeting you

meeting you what's that

what's that

what's that never judge a serial killer

foreign

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] still taking away keys and driving all

still taking away keys and driving all

still taking away keys and driving all the drunks home huh keeps me in business

the drunks home huh keeps me in business

the drunks home huh keeps me in business you're a good man more Dale

amateur dry competition The Rose Room

it's a sign

so no

so no

so no plus two

plus two

plus two and then a big strange city you're not

and then a big strange city you're not

and then a big strange city you're not here

here

here [Laughter]

here

here

here don't belong anywhere [ __ ] you don't

don't belong anywhere [ __ ] you don't

don't belong anywhere [ __ ] you don't know I'm here

know I'm here

know I'm here you start about big titted

you start about big titted

you start about big titted alcoholic Homer hating damn popping

alcoholic Homer hating damn popping

alcoholic Homer hating damn popping [ __ ]

[ __ ]

[ __ ] you go away forever

ding dong the [ __ ] is dead

foreign

[Music]

but you gotta start somewhere

but you gotta start somewhere

but you gotta start somewhere you moving in

you moving in

you moving in no I'm not moving in I just wanted

no I'm not moving in I just wanted

no I'm not moving in I just wanted choices for the competition oh

choices for the competition oh

choices for the competition oh you know Andrew Christians are not real

you know Andrew Christians are not real

you know Andrew Christians are not real quick

do you need a shot of Courage yeah I'm

do you need a shot of Courage yeah I'm

do you need a shot of Courage yeah I'm nervous

girl I love this dress and this one is

girl I love this dress and this one is

girl I love this dress and this one is divine now I made a must-have shut the

divine now I made a must-have shut the

divine now I made a must-have shut the front door you're gonna be fabulous baby

front door you're gonna be fabulous baby

front door you're gonna be fabulous baby oh thank you

grandmother did they let you out of the

grandmother did they let you out of the

grandmother did they let you out of the home Crystal sign up Angie Dickinson

home Crystal sign up Angie Dickinson

home Crystal sign up Angie Dickinson here don't pay any attention to Cassie

here don't pay any attention to Cassie

here don't pay any attention to Cassie she's bipolar

she's bipolar

she's bipolar I'm precious I'm not Angie Dickinson I

I'm precious I'm not Angie Dickinson I

I'm precious I'm not Angie Dickinson I am Tammy Wynette more like Tammy why not

am Tammy Wynette more like Tammy why not

am Tammy Wynette more like Tammy why not big red one is delicious wait till you

big red one is delicious wait till you

big red one is delicious wait till you hear this audience

oh God

oh God

oh God this is where I learned to be gay

this is where I learned to be gay

this is where I learned to be gay Underwood tables

Underwood tables

Underwood tables ladies and Gentlemen please make welcome

ladies and Gentlemen please make welcome

ladies and Gentlemen please make welcome to the stage

hey you crazy [ __ ]

hey you crazy [ __ ]

hey you crazy [ __ ] welcome welcome to the amateur show here

welcome welcome to the amateur show here

welcome welcome to the amateur show here in the Rose Room at S4 can we talk about

in the Rose Room at S4 can we talk about

in the Rose Room at S4 can we talk about how gay this [ __ ] looks

how gay this [ __ ] looks

how gay this [ __ ] looks I'm in a freaking grant that he is gayer

I'm in a freaking grant that he is gayer

I'm in a freaking grant that he is gayer than I am and he's wearing more makeup

than I am and he's wearing more makeup

than I am and he's wearing more makeup stole the crown and one neat please how

stole the crown and one neat please how

stole the crown and one neat please how you doing

you doing

you doing I don't know other side

he's laughed his ass I don't care about

he's laughed his ass I don't care about

he's laughed his ass I don't care about his ass

his ass

his ass oh his face

oh his face

oh his face now tonight we are being sponsored by

now tonight we are being sponsored by

now tonight we are being sponsored by Stoli so lift your glasses with me in

Stoli so lift your glasses with me in

Stoli so lift your glasses with me in the name of the Lord and all that is

the name of the Lord and all that is

the name of the Lord and all that is Holy cheers to queers the Lord look how

Holy cheers to queers the Lord look how

Holy cheers to queers the Lord look how young I was

young I was

young I was yeah that was about the time that I

yeah that was about the time that I

yeah that was about the time that I kissed the most beautiful gal I'd ever

kissed the most beautiful gal I'd ever

kissed the most beautiful gal I'd ever seen

seen

seen down by the old cow Pond and I was

down by the old cow Pond and I was

down by the old cow Pond and I was barely 16. yeah

barely 16. yeah

barely 16. yeah yeah oh

yeah oh

yeah oh and that's not all we did down by the

and that's not all we did down by the

and that's not all we did down by the cow Pond if I remember correctly

cow Pond if I remember correctly

cow Pond if I remember correctly ah Young Love nothing like it

ah Young Love nothing like it

ah Young Love nothing like it well maybe there is Vonnie

because you're still the most beautiful

because you're still the most beautiful

because you're still the most beautiful gal I've ever laid eyes on

[Music]

[Music]

I never stop loving you Bonnie

ladies and gentlemen

great job girl great job you see this is

great job girl great job you see this is

great job girl great job you see this is the gold Queen this is the goal all

the gold Queen this is the goal all

the gold Queen this is the goal all right y'all for this next Entertainer I

right y'all for this next Entertainer I

right y'all for this next Entertainer I want y'all to keep y'all's expectations

want y'all to keep y'all's expectations

want y'all to keep y'all's expectations real low cause this next Old Country

real low cause this next Old Country

real low cause this next Old Country Queen is short as [ __ ] ladies and

Queen is short as [ __ ] ladies and

Queen is short as [ __ ] ladies and gentlemen Miss Tammy why not

gentlemen Miss Tammy why not

gentlemen Miss Tammy why not [Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause] give me

[Music]

he said Hold On Patricia I only tried to

he said Hold On Patricia I only tried to

he said Hold On Patricia I only tried to kiss you she said okay but then said

kiss you she said okay but then said

kiss you she said okay but then said don't you dare

don't you dare

don't you dare foreign

foreign

foreign [Music]

[Music]

now thank you

[Applause]

George Jones drank to calm his nerves it

George Jones drank to calm his nerves it

George Jones drank to calm his nerves it did not work for me

excuse me but I'm so sorry y'all had to

excuse me but I'm so sorry y'all had to

excuse me but I'm so sorry y'all had to witness this catastrophe I got on stage

witness this catastrophe I got on stage

witness this catastrophe I got on stage and I just bunched up my throat I just I

and I just bunched up my throat I just I

and I just bunched up my throat I just I couldn't I froze

couldn't I froze

couldn't I froze I think you're my uncle brother boy

I think you're my uncle brother boy

I think you're my uncle brother boy you're the trials boy I am

you're the trials boy I am

you're the trials boy I am this is my husband Kyle your husband

love those Nails oh they'd look good

love those Nails oh they'd look good

love those Nails oh they'd look good with your color

do you live here I hitchhike up here

do you live here I hitchhike up here

do you live here I hitchhike up here from Longview it's just a really long

from Longview it's just a really long

from Longview it's just a really long story

story

story um

um

um everything how old is in a sack

everything how old is in a sack

everything how old is in a sack oh my possessions my worldly possession

oh my possessions my worldly possession

oh my possessions my worldly possession turns the side

turns the side

turns the side we're headed back to Winter's uncle

we're headed back to Winter's uncle

we're headed back to Winter's uncle brother boy do you want to come home

brother boy do you want to come home

brother boy do you want to come home with us hell no I haven't been home

with us hell no I haven't been home

with us hell no I haven't been home since I saw you last time at Mama's

since I saw you last time at Mama's

since I saw you last time at Mama's funeral that was always a bigger

funeral that was always a bigger

funeral that was always a bigger disaster than to die

disaster than to die

disaster than to die I think you should reconsider

I think you should reconsider

I think you should reconsider it's time we all be a family again

[Music]

foreign

foreign

foreign [Music]

[Music]

[Music] guilty

where have you been all night oh [ __ ]

where have you been all night oh [ __ ]

where have you been all night oh [ __ ] me and Wardell got back together

in the world are you expecting anybody

what happens to them

what happens to them

what happens to them oh you must be calm welcome to Winners

oh you must be calm welcome to Winners

oh you must be calm welcome to Winners it's a pleasure to be here and look who

it's a pleasure to be here and look who

it's a pleasure to be here and look who we found just wandering the streets of

we found just wandering the streets of

we found just wandering the streets of Dallas

[Music]

Billy Joe Dobson is dead kill during a

Billy Joe Dobson is dead kill during a

Billy Joe Dobson is dead kill during a shootout with police and after a

shootout with police and after a

shootout with police and after a dramatic car chase through Dallas late

dramatic car chase through Dallas late

dramatic car chase through Dallas late last night take a close look here this

last night take a close look here this

last night take a close look here this elderly woman is believed to be The

elderly woman is believed to be The

elderly woman is believed to be The Hitchhiker murderer's final victim

Hitchhiker murderer's final victim

Hitchhiker murderer's final victim police are currently looking for her

police are currently looking for her

police are currently looking for her body we will keep you updated as we

body we will keep you updated as we

body we will keep you updated as we learn more the Fallen Angel has returned

learn more the Fallen Angel has returned

learn more the Fallen Angel has returned to heaven and she has that poor old

to heaven and she has that poor old

to heaven and she has that poor old woman wonder why she he's hitchhiking at

woman wonder why she he's hitchhiking at

woman wonder why she he's hitchhiking at her age

oh well got everything planned it's all

oh well got everything planned it's all

oh well got everything planned it's all mapped out all right well let's discuss

mapped out all right well let's discuss

mapped out all right well let's discuss everything over breakfast I got plenty

everything over breakfast I got plenty

everything over breakfast I got plenty it's almost ready

it's almost ready

it's almost ready like cold biscuit

like cold biscuit

like cold biscuit look who we brought

brother boy

you look very pretty

I missed you

I missed you

I missed you do I know you

well I guess I deserve that but I'm

well I guess I deserve that but I'm

well I guess I deserve that but I'm trying oh she's still a [ __ ]

trying oh she's still a [ __ ]

trying oh she's still a [ __ ] but it's just not non-stop anymore

but it's just not non-stop anymore

but it's just not non-stop anymore do you mind

rather poor that's awful to you

rather poor that's awful to you

rather poor that's awful to you I

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

I'm sorry it's just that it's not just changed

it's just that it's not just changed

it's just that it's not just changed is changing

I guess it just took me a while oh wow

I guess it just took me a while oh wow

I guess it just took me a while oh wow too long okay

too long okay

too long okay I want to make up for lost time

I want to make up for lost time

I want to make up for lost time can we

can we go back to the way it was

can we go back to the way it was

can we go back to the way it was when we were little

when we were little

when we were little we used to play dress up together

we used to play dress up together

we used to play dress up together whoa

whoa

whoa what size dress are you

I love you

I love you

I love you I love you I love you too little proud

I love you I love you too little proud

I love you I love you too little proud thank you Ty y'all just sit down

thank you Ty y'all just sit down

thank you Ty y'all just sit down anywhere now you did some remodeling I

anywhere now you did some remodeling I

anywhere now you did some remodeling I did now I can watch my shows while I'm

did now I can watch my shows while I'm

did now I can watch my shows while I'm eating and cooking oh he is black I

eating and cooking oh he is black I

eating and cooking oh he is black I prefer hot chocolate milk then cheese of

prefer hot chocolate milk then cheese of

prefer hot chocolate milk then cheese of course that's hot chocolate mocha

course that's hot chocolate mocha

course that's hot chocolate mocha replaced African-American no I'm just

replaced African-American no I'm just

replaced African-American no I'm just being silly and I'm guessing this pretty

being silly and I'm guessing this pretty

being silly and I'm guessing this pretty later must be nolita thank you yes

later must be nolita thank you yes

later must be nolita thank you yes nolita and why can't even tan and I'm in

nolita and why can't even tan and I'm in

nolita and why can't even tan and I'm in love too I think but it's not the gay

love too I think but it's not the gay

love too I think but it's not the gay love can't go there sometimes I think

love can't go there sometimes I think

love can't go there sometimes I think it'd be easier less complicated but I am

it'd be easier less complicated but I am

it'd be easier less complicated but I am attracted to black men wow I'm a

attracted to black men wow I'm a

attracted to black men wow I'm a African-American Man black works I've

African-American Man black works I've

African-American Man black works I've never been to Africa oh yeah I sure am

never been to Africa oh yeah I sure am

never been to Africa oh yeah I sure am excited about your one wide and one

excited about your one wide and one

excited about your one wide and one mixed twins we prefer biracial biracial

mixed twins we prefer biracial biracial

mixed twins we prefer biracial biracial Lord I cannot keep up

girl you've been busy I tried to do my

girl you've been busy I tried to do my

girl you've been busy I tried to do my best and that's what matters I believe

best and that's what matters I believe

best and that's what matters I believe the intention is more important than the

the intention is more important than the

the intention is more important than the words all good to know but we got to get

words all good to know but we got to get

words all good to know but we got to get organized for the anti-equality Revival

organized for the anti-equality Revival

organized for the anti-equality Revival tonight we gotta get busy because [ __ ]

tonight we gotta get busy because [ __ ]

tonight we gotta get busy because [ __ ] is about to hit the fan

would you leave us in an opening word of

would you leave us in an opening word of

would you leave us in an opening word of prayer well of course ladies

prayer well of course ladies

prayer well of course ladies Let the church house be packed to the

Let the church house be packed to the

Let the church house be packed to the rafters oh Lord yes Lord let Sinners

rafters oh Lord yes Lord let Sinners

rafters oh Lord yes Lord let Sinners come in that front door what's going on

come in that front door what's going on

come in that front door what's going on here Juanita hun we're right in the

here Juanita hun we're right in the

here Juanita hun we're right in the middle of our final

middle of our final

middle of our final anti-equality committee meeting that

anti-equality committee meeting that

anti-equality committee meeting that doesn't sound right well it is now we

doesn't sound right well it is now we

doesn't sound right well it is now we would just love for you to join us

would just love for you to join us

would just love for you to join us tonight if you would I have a conflict

tonight if you would I have a conflict

tonight if you would I have a conflict there's something going on real

there's something going on real

there's something going on real important over at that bar that I

important over at that bar that I

important over at that bar that I sometimes frequent uh

sometimes frequent uh

sometimes frequent uh called uh I forget

called uh I forget

called uh I forget Bubbas that would be the one

Bubbas that would be the one

Bubbas that would be the one might as well be called the den of

might as well be called the den of

might as well be called the den of iniquity I think that one's over in New

iniquity I think that one's over in New

iniquity I think that one's over in New Orleans hey biggin uh packing my

Orleans hey biggin uh packing my

Orleans hey biggin uh packing my cigarettes and uh these Cheetos

cigarettes and uh these Cheetos

cigarettes and uh these Cheetos the name is Vera Vera lisso not biggen

the name is Vera Vera lisso not biggen

the name is Vera Vera lisso not biggen we've been through this a few hundred

we've been through this a few hundred

we've been through this a few hundred times big and Suits You better

times big and Suits You better

times big and Suits You better the best people make a cheese

the best people make a cheese

the best people make a cheese at a raw milk that is aged in a cave for

at a raw milk that is aged in a cave for

at a raw milk that is aged in a cave for four or five months how do you know that

four or five months how do you know that

four or five months how do you know that Juanita I forget

keep the chains big and it's two pennies

keep the chains big and it's two pennies

keep the chains big and it's two pennies all yours

all yours

all yours and it's ripened with mold and they

and it's ripened with mold and they

and it's ripened with mold and they scrape the mold off before you eat it

scrape the mold off before you eat it

scrape the mold off before you eat it and that's where the best people lost me

and that's where the best people lost me

and that's where the best people lost me the gates are down and the lights are

the gates are down and the lights are

the gates are down and the lights are flashing

flashing

flashing but the train is not coming will the

but the train is not coming will the

but the train is not coming will the circle

circle

circle Be Unbroken

hurry up Latrell they've already started

yes

yes

yes [Music]

[Music]

there's a better

there's a better

there's a better home away

in the sky Lord in the sky

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] yes brothers and sisters let's keep our

yes brothers and sisters let's keep our

yes brothers and sisters let's keep our circle from being broken by sodomite

circle from being broken by sodomite

circle from being broken by sodomite Sinners amen

Sinners amen

Sinners amen yes and please forgive our appearance

yes and please forgive our appearance

yes and please forgive our appearance today because Roger and about homosexual

today because Roger and about homosexual

today because Roger and about homosexual has decided not to fix anybody's hair

has decided not to fix anybody's hair

has decided not to fix anybody's hair who believes in this good book

who believes in this good book

who believes in this good book amen

amen

amen are y'all ready for some good

are y'all ready for some good

are y'all ready for some good old-fashioned preaching amen

please welcome to Southside Baptist

please welcome to Southside Baptist

please welcome to Southside Baptist our new pastor

our new pastor

our new pastor give me Ryan

Roger

Roger

Roger

Roger this is my husband Kyle nice to meet you

this is my husband Kyle nice to meet you

this is my husband Kyle nice to meet you Roger and you

Roger and you

Roger and you lower these people are not going to know

lower these people are not going to know

lower these people are not going to know whether to be racist or homophobic

whether to be racist or homophobic

whether to be racist or homophobic did I miss anything nothing you haven't

did I miss anything nothing you haven't

did I miss anything nothing you haven't heard a hundred million times before but

heard a hundred million times before but

heard a hundred million times before but that preacher is hotness

that preacher is hotness

that preacher is hotness Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with

Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with

Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind

womankind

womankind it is an Abomination Amen brother no

it is an Abomination Amen brother no

it is an Abomination Amen brother no Satan was the first to ask for equal

Satan was the first to ask for equal

Satan was the first to ask for equal rights yeah that's right flip over to

rights yeah that's right flip over to

rights yeah that's right flip over to Isaiah 14 14 where Lucifer proclaims I

Isaiah 14 14 where Lucifer proclaims I

Isaiah 14 14 where Lucifer proclaims I will be like the most high

will be like the most high

will be like the most high wanted to be equal with God but Satan

wanted to be equal with God but Satan

wanted to be equal with God but Satan never got his equal rights did he no no

never got his equal rights did he no no

never got his equal rights did he no no he fell down to the bows of hell

he fell down to the bows of hell

he fell down to the bows of hell just like the gays will

just like the gays will

just like the gays will I just love this church you know they're

I just love this church you know they're

I just love this church you know they're not all like this anymore you can't

not all like this anymore you can't

not all like this anymore you can't swing a cat in this town without hitting

swing a cat in this town without hitting

swing a cat in this town without hitting a bigot

a bigot

a bigot I remember but you know hearts and minds

I remember but you know hearts and minds

I remember but you know hearts and minds are changing

are changing

are changing and hey these bigots actually inspired

and hey these bigots actually inspired

and hey these bigots actually inspired me to do what I do

me to do what I do

me to do what I do I work for faith in America and we try

I work for faith in America and we try

I work for faith in America and we try to help people work through the damage

to help people work through the damage

to help people work through the damage and to prove to them that

and to prove to them that

and to prove to them that God includes us too

God includes us too

God includes us too you question the creation

you question the creation

you question the creation you question the Creator

you question the Creator

you question the Creator lots of affirm in churches popping up

lots of affirm in churches popping up

lots of affirm in churches popping up everywhere my mama's the pastor of one

everywhere my mama's the pastor of one

everywhere my mama's the pastor of one over in Phoenix lucky you

you put a face on gay Roger

you put a face on gay Roger

you put a face on gay Roger when I was a little boy I used to sit

when I was a little boy I used to sit

when I was a little boy I used to sit and watch Roger do mama and have lavanda

and watch Roger do mama and have lavanda

and watch Roger do mama and have lavanda and had Susie's Hair and I used to

and had Susie's Hair and I used to

and had Susie's Hair and I used to pretend that I was Roger from The

pretend that I was Roger from The

pretend that I was Roger from The Beehive I read my dial Susie Q's hair

Beehive I read my dial Susie Q's hair

Beehive I read my dial Susie Q's hair until she was bald

until she was bald

until she was bald thank you

thank you

thank you inspired me to accept all of me so

inspired me to accept all of me so

inspired me to accept all of me so thank you

you don't know what that means to me

oh we better get in the Mama's about to

oh we better get in the Mama's about to

oh we better get in the Mama's about to explode are you coming oh hell no I can

explode are you coming oh hell no I can

explode are you coming oh hell no I can hear the hate just fine from out here

thank y'all oh that was my mama's

thank y'all oh that was my mama's

thank y'all oh that was my mama's favorite ham oh that's just beautiful

favorite ham oh that's just beautiful

favorite ham oh that's just beautiful wardale you know Bonnie last night was

wardale you know Bonnie last night was

wardale you know Bonnie last night was really special for me me too

really special for me me too

really special for me me too that's it

that's it

that's it don't even think about it hey you zombie

don't even think about it hey you zombie

don't even think about it hey you zombie what the hell oh hi GW I didn't say

what the hell oh hi GW I didn't say

what the hell oh hi GW I didn't say you're standing there get your goddamn

you're standing there get your goddamn

you're standing there get your goddamn white trash hands off you're the white

white trash hands off you're the white

white trash hands off you're the white trash

trash

trash into me are d-i-b-o-r-c-e I can't find

into me are d-i-b-o-r-c-e I can't find

into me are d-i-b-o-r-c-e I can't find her 17 years ago ran out loud Wardell do

her 17 years ago ran out loud Wardell do

her 17 years ago ran out loud Wardell do something they're ruining my mama's

something they're ruining my mama's

something they're ruining my mama's tribute

oh

God kick his ass

y'all ought to be ashamed of yourselves

y'all ought to be ashamed of yourselves

y'all ought to be ashamed of yourselves we are trying to honor the life of a

we are trying to honor the life of a

we are trying to honor the life of a good woman here today

good woman here today

good woman here today and y'all are ruining it no leader you

and y'all are ruining it no leader you

and y'all are ruining it no leader you came in here just seeking trouble now

came in here just seeking trouble now

came in here just seeking trouble now you get out of my bar get yourself a

you get out of my bar get yourself a

you get out of my bar get yourself a room at the Galaxy Motel

room at the Galaxy Motel

room at the Galaxy Motel and GW stopped this damn nonsense you

and GW stopped this damn nonsense you

and GW stopped this damn nonsense you forfeited every right you had in your

forfeited every right you had in your

forfeited every right you had in your marriage to nolita Peggy was the one you

marriage to nolita Peggy was the one you

marriage to nolita Peggy was the one you really loved buddy

really loved buddy

really loved buddy you love Peggy

you love Peggy

you love Peggy let's show her that tonight huh okay

let's show her that tonight huh okay

let's show her that tonight huh okay I'm sorry Wardell

I'm sorry Wardell

I'm sorry Wardell lavanda Hardy will give me a ride home

lavanda Hardy will give me a ride home

lavanda Hardy will give me a ride home I'm sure he will

I'm sure he will

I'm sure he will now put your leg back on

you see the Supreme Court is not the

you see the Supreme Court is not the

you see the Supreme Court is not the Supreme Being

Supreme Being

Supreme Being and I thank the good Lord for Texas and

and I thank the good Lord for Texas and

and I thank the good Lord for Texas and I talked to Gail Wade our County Clerk

I talked to Gail Wade our County Clerk

I talked to Gail Wade our County Clerk today into Tinky Walker or Justice of

today into Tinky Walker or Justice of

today into Tinky Walker or Justice of the Peace they're sitting right back

the Peace they're sitting right back

the Peace they're sitting right back there y'all stand up

there y'all stand up

there y'all stand up good Christian Warriors they have

good Christian Warriors they have

good Christian Warriors they have assured me

assured me

assured me that exercise on their religious freedom

that exercise on their religious freedom

that exercise on their religious freedom will no longer allow same-sex couples to

will no longer allow same-sex couples to

will no longer allow same-sex couples to get married in Reynolds County

get married in Reynolds County

get married in Reynolds County you know what that means gays can't get

you know what that means gays can't get

you know what that means gays can't get married in the church

married in the church

married in the church gays can't get married in the courthouse

gays can't get married in the courthouse

gays can't get married in the courthouse no place to get married nobody to marry

no place to get married nobody to marry

no place to get married nobody to marry them we have shut out the sodomites

them we have shut out the sodomites

them we have shut out the sodomites those pedophiles will no longer

those pedophiles will no longer

those pedophiles will no longer persecute good God fearing Christians

persecute good God fearing Christians

persecute good God fearing Christians and tonight I Proclaim that runnels

and tonight I Proclaim that runnels

and tonight I Proclaim that runnels County be a sanctuary County free of gay

County be a sanctuary County free of gay

County be a sanctuary County free of gay marriage we have stopped equality oh no

marriage we have stopped equality oh no

marriage we have stopped equality oh no you haven't

you haven't

you haven't sister do you have something to say

sister do you have something to say

sister do you have something to say oh yes brother I have plenty to say

oh yes brother I have plenty to say

oh yes brother I have plenty to say all right let's hear what the good

all right let's hear what the good

all right let's hear what the good sister has to say

sister has to say

sister has to say come on [ __ ]

come on [ __ ]

come on [ __ ] crabby Pop I got it

my son

my son

my son is gay

is gay

is gay and um my sweet aunt [ __ ] here has been

and um my sweet aunt [ __ ] here has been

and um my sweet aunt [ __ ] here has been doing research on his behalf read the

doing research on his behalf read the

doing research on his behalf read the Bible from cover to cover [ __ ] what

Bible from cover to cover [ __ ] what

Bible from cover to cover [ __ ] what does Jesus say about homosexuality

does Jesus say about homosexuality

does Jesus say about homosexuality not one blessed word that is not true

not one blessed word that is not true

not one blessed word that is not true yes it is First Corinthians that was

yes it is First Corinthians that was

yes it is First Corinthians that was Paul not Jesus if you have a degree in

Paul not Jesus if you have a degree in

Paul not Jesus if you have a degree in theology get it right Jesus said nothing

theology get it right Jesus said nothing

theology get it right Jesus said nothing nothing

do you believe in all the Bible of

do you believe in all the Bible of

do you believe in all the Bible of course we do

course we do

course we do then why do you eat bacon

then why do you eat bacon

then why do you eat bacon Deuteronomy 14 8.

Deuteronomy 14 8.

Deuteronomy 14 8. and the swine it is unclean unto you ye

and the swine it is unclean unto you ye

and the swine it is unclean unto you ye shall not eat their flesh

the Bible says to all of us who eat

the Bible says to all of us who eat

the Bible says to all of us who eat bacon and pigs feet and

bacon and pigs feet and

bacon and pigs feet and pork chops and Doritos sausage casserole

pork chops and Doritos sausage casserole

pork chops and Doritos sausage casserole that eating pork is wrong

that eating pork is wrong

that eating pork is wrong but bacon is good and we eat it because

but bacon is good and we eat it because

but bacon is good and we eat it because this scripture don't make a lick of

this scripture don't make a lick of

this scripture don't make a lick of sense that's the Old Testament Jesus

sense that's the Old Testament Jesus

sense that's the Old Testament Jesus gave us the new law that includes me

gave us the new law that includes me

gave us the new law that includes me getting to eat bacon

getting to eat bacon

getting to eat bacon yet Vera you were the first to scream

yet Vera you were the first to scream

yet Vera you were the first to scream amen when the pastor read from the Old

amen when the pastor read from the Old

amen when the pastor read from the Old Testament Thou shalt not lie with

Testament Thou shalt not lie with

Testament Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind it is an

mankind as with womankind it is an

mankind as with womankind it is an abomination

abomination

abomination ever lied with a woman once the way I

ever lied with a woman once the way I

ever lied with a woman once the way I lie with you back in the New Testament

lie with you back in the New Testament

lie with you back in the New Testament certainly tells women to be silent

certainly tells women to be silent

certainly tells women to be silent and Vera Mrs Barnes

and Vera Mrs Barnes

and Vera Mrs Barnes poor tents

poor tents

poor tents y'all never shut up and tanky

y'all never shut up and tanky

y'all never shut up and tanky Gail

Gail

Gail y'all issue three of my five wedding

y'all issue three of my five wedding

y'all issue three of my five wedding licenses and adultery is riddled all

licenses and adultery is riddled all

licenses and adultery is riddled all over both Testaments and says that

over both Testaments and says that

over both Testaments and says that adulterers should be stoned to death I

adulterers should be stoned to death I

adulterers should be stoned to death I demand that you sit down right now and

demand that you sit down right now and

demand that you sit down right now and stop hijacking this service with your

stop hijacking this service with your

stop hijacking this service with your own agenda and support for this deviant

own agenda and support for this deviant

own agenda and support for this deviant perverted Behavior I am not done

perverted Behavior I am not done

perverted Behavior I am not done and unless you want a scene that

and unless you want a scene that

and unless you want a scene that involves kicking and screaming and

involves kicking and screaming and

involves kicking and screaming and scratching and clawing out some eyeballs

scratching and clawing out some eyeballs

scratching and clawing out some eyeballs and taking that Bible and beating you

and taking that Bible and beating you

and taking that Bible and beating you with it the way you beat people with it

with it the way you beat people with it

with it the way you beat people with it then I would advise you to back off and

then I would advise you to back off and

then I would advise you to back off and regroup until I am done call the trail

regroup until I am done call the trail

regroup until I am done call the trail the Trail's not normally this violent

the Trail's not normally this violent

the Trail's not normally this violent but you have set her off so just

[ __ ]

[ __ ]

[ __ ] please read the scripture that I have

please read the scripture that I have

please read the scripture that I have chosen for my sermon

John 4 7.

dear friends

dear friends

dear friends let us love one another

that's all

that's all

that's all simple

simple

simple just love

just love

just love says it all doesn't it

my son time

my son time

my son time his husband Kyle

his husband Kyle

his husband Kyle have now gotten married in every state

have now gotten married in every state

have now gotten married in every state except Texas gay activists there called

except Texas gay activists there called

except Texas gay activists there called they did it as a publicity thing for

they did it as a publicity thing for

they did it as a publicity thing for Todd's job which helps the gays

Todd's job which helps the gays

Todd's job which helps the gays and we taught our son to fight for what

and we taught our son to fight for what

and we taught our son to fight for what is right

is right

is right and I'm

and I'm

and I'm ashamed to say that I always found a

ashamed to say that I always found a

ashamed to say that I always found a reason not to attend their weddings and

reason not to attend their weddings and

reason not to attend their weddings and I'm sorry Ty Kaya truly sorry

I'm sorry Ty Kaya truly sorry

I'm sorry Ty Kaya truly sorry I guess

I guess

I guess Because deep down

Because deep down

Because deep down just went against everything that I was

just went against everything that I was

just went against everything that I was taught right here in South Side Baptist

taught right here in South Side Baptist

taught right here in South Side Baptist but then something happened that

but then something happened that

but then something happened that changed my heart

changed my heart

changed my heart [Music]

[Music]

[Music] Ty

Ty

Ty and Kyle

and Kyle

and Kyle they're gonna be daddies

they're gonna be daddies

they're gonna be daddies and you Reverend Bruton just preached

and you Reverend Bruton just preached

and you Reverend Bruton just preached the gay should not be parents that they

the gay should not be parents that they

the gay should not be parents that they are pedophiles that is the truth liar it

are pedophiles that is the truth liar it

are pedophiles that is the truth liar it is so far from it

I know my boy he is not that

I know my boy he is not that

I know my boy he is not that he is not capable

he is not capable

he is not capable he has a good heart

he has a good heart

he has a good heart pure

and you know him too

and you know him too

and you know him too and I know you love him

all those sermons like this one tonight

all those sermons like this one tonight

all those sermons like this one tonight calling my beautiful son and his

calling my beautiful son and his

calling my beautiful son and his beautiful husband pedophiles

beautiful husband pedophiles

beautiful husband pedophiles Abominations

Abominations

Abominations sinner sweat

sinner sweat

sinner sweat those sermons are wrong I preach the

those sermons are wrong I preach the

those sermons are wrong I preach the word of God no you cherry pick what

word of God no you cherry pick what

word of God no you cherry pick what serves your agenda

serves your agenda

serves your agenda says he has proven that tonight

says he has proven that tonight

says he has proven that tonight and we must

and we must

and we must stop

stop

stop feeling nice in our own children

telling them that they are not worthy of

telling them that they are not worthy of

telling them that they are not worthy of God's love because they are

just as they are

and right now

and right now

and right now foreign

they are celebrating the life of my mama

they are celebrating the life of my mama

they are celebrating the life of my mama who did not die from a tumor that was

who did not die from a tumor that was

who did not die from a tumor that was present against the sexual part of her

present against the sexual part of her

present against the sexual part of her brain I lied okay a real Sin to cover up

brain I lied okay a real Sin to cover up

brain I lied okay a real Sin to cover up the truth

but no more cover-ups

but no more cover-ups

but no more cover-ups [Music]

[Music]

[Music] my son

my son

my son is gay

and I am proud of him

all of him

all of him

all of him and so I would like to turn my mama's

and so I would like to turn my mama's

and so I would like to turn my mama's celebration of life into a celebration

celebration of life into a celebration

celebration of life into a celebration of love and end this hateful night led

of love and end this hateful night led

of love and end this hateful night led by this hateful person so I invite all

by this hateful person so I invite all

by this hateful person so I invite all of you

of you

of you come with me and with my aunt [ __ ] and

come with me and with my aunt [ __ ] and

come with me and with my aunt [ __ ] and with my son and son-in-law

with my son and son-in-law

with my son and son-in-law and my brother

and my brother

and my brother Paul

Paul

Paul [Music]

I guess y'all didn't think I was gonna

I guess y'all didn't think I was gonna

I guess y'all didn't think I was gonna make it did you bigot come on the trail

make it did you bigot come on the trail

make it did you bigot come on the trail I got a show to do

I got a show to do

I got a show to do [Music]

[Music]

[Music] ladies and gentlemen would you please

ladies and gentlemen would you please

ladies and gentlemen would you please help me welcome to the state the first

help me welcome to the state the first

help me welcome to the state the first lady of country music miss m a y Nat he

lady of country music miss m a y Nat he

lady of country music miss m a y Nat he said hold on Katrina

said hold on Katrina

said hold on Katrina I only tried to kiss you she said okay

I only tried to kiss you she said okay

I only tried to kiss you she said okay but then said don't you dare

but then said don't you dare

but then said don't you dare foreign

foreign

foreign [Music]

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] what are you doing oh it's

what are you doing oh it's

what are you doing oh it's just it's called we three queens of

just it's called we three queens of

just it's called we three queens of operation I gotta get these boots off

that's my weight is it is

he sure is second Loretta

he sure is second Loretta

he sure is second Loretta [Applause]

tell me

tell me

tell me [Music]

[Music]

I want you to meet my wife

I want you to meet my wife

I want you to meet my wife and I would like you to meet my husband

and I would like you to meet my husband

and I would like you to meet my husband I'm Kyle

hello

hello

hello [Music]

[Music]

thank you

thank you

thank you [Music]

[Music]

[Music] if I had these two days I'd love them

if I had these two days I'd love them

if I had these two days I'd love them down

[Music]

[Music]

situation

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] I am so confused

I am so confused

I am so confused [Music]

[Music]

[Music] betrayal betrayal

betrayal betrayal

betrayal betrayal [Music]

come on come on

come on come on

come on come on [Music]

ah

ah

ah get off

get off

get off Oh Come Back

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] [Applause]

I'm just amazing

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] feel good

[Music]

thank you

thank you

thank you [Music]

[Music]

[Music] I don't want to steal the ride's Thunder

I don't want to steal the ride's Thunder

I don't want to steal the ride's Thunder is my hair too big too big what does

is my hair too big too big what does

is my hair too big too big what does that even mean

what's up

what's up

what's up [Music]

oh stop that but not anytime soon

I feel like a big bird I think this one

I feel like a big bird I think this one

I feel like a big bird I think this one can be repeated

is she doing looks like she's taken upon

is she doing looks like she's taken upon

is she doing looks like she's taken upon herself to be the flower girl she's

herself to be the flower girl she's

herself to be the flower girl she's ruined the ribbon

ruined the ribbon

ruined the ribbon foreign

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] seriously

seriously

seriously [Music]

[Music]

[Music] let's get over shoes

let's get over shoes

let's get over shoes [Music]

what the [ __ ]

foreign

foreign

foreign [Music]

[Music]

[Music] family is falling apart because of

family is falling apart because of

family is falling apart because of inbreeding

[Music]

pinch me so I'll know this is really

pinch me so I'll know this is really

pinch me so I'll know this is really happening

happening

happening ouch yeah it's really happening

ouch yeah it's really happening

ouch yeah it's really happening [Music]

[Music]

[Music] you found love Bubba

surprise everybody it's gonna be a

surprise everybody it's gonna be a

surprise everybody it's gonna be a double wedding Ramos county is now a

double wedding Ramos county is now a

double wedding Ramos county is now a sanctuary of love and we are having our

sanctuary of love and we are having our

sanctuary of love and we are having our first gay wedding [ __ ] yeah

first gay wedding [ __ ] yeah

first gay wedding [ __ ] yeah [Music]

[Music]

[Music] is everybody at work in a smaller please

is everybody at work in a smaller please

is everybody at work in a smaller please well

well

well we are here to celebrate love

we are here to celebrate love

we are here to celebrate love now who in their right mind would have

now who in their right mind would have

now who in their right mind would have ever thought that we could have such a

ever thought that we could have such a

ever thought that we could have such a beautiful wedding for such wonderful

beautiful wedding for such wonderful

beautiful wedding for such wonderful couples right here in the state of Texas

couples right here in the state of Texas

couples right here in the state of Texas amen amen amen

amen amen amen

amen amen amen First Corinthians 13 says love is

First Corinthians 13 says love is

First Corinthians 13 says love is patient

patient

patient and I think that scripture

and I think that scripture

and I think that scripture fits

fits

fits these two couples how can anybody look

these two couples how can anybody look

these two couples how can anybody look upon these units and question love

upon these units and question love

upon these units and question love if you are here and you can't see the

if you are here and you can't see the

if you are here and you can't see the love that's going on in here something's

love that's going on in here something's

love that's going on in here something's wrong with you amen amen

wrong with you amen amen

wrong with you amen amen amen

amen

amen amen

amen

amen I don't say do not speak

I don't say do not speak

I don't say do not speak I don't say forever hold your peace

I don't say forever hold your peace

I don't say forever hold your peace I say get up

I say get up

I say get up get your ass out of here you need to

get your ass out of here you need to

get your ass out of here you need to leave

leave

leave you need to go now get out

now I think we're all right

now I think we're all right

now I think we're all right everybody's good here

everybody's good here

everybody's good here that's not to say they're not [ __ ]

that's not to say they're not [ __ ]

that's not to say they're not [ __ ] out there

out there

out there hey this is my kind of preaching but

hey this is my kind of preaching but

hey this is my kind of preaching but it's the truth it's the truth bigots

it's the truth it's the truth bigots

it's the truth it's the truth bigots folks who want to tell you how to live

folks who want to tell you how to live

folks who want to tell you how to live your lives but I want you son to live

your lives but I want you son to live

your lives but I want you son to live your life with the beautiful man you

your life with the beautiful man you

your life with the beautiful man you love

love

love and I want the two of you what's your

and I want the two of you what's your

and I want the two of you what's your name again lavonda lavonda that's a fair

name again lavonda lavonda that's a fair

name again lavonda lavonda that's a fair black man and what's your name I'm

black man and what's your name I'm

black man and what's your name I'm ordell two of them thank you and the two

ordell two of them thank you and the two

ordell two of them thank you and the two of you we want you to live in the love

of you we want you to live in the love

of you we want you to live in the love that you've been holding for each other

that you've been holding for each other

that you've been holding for each other for such a long time

for such a long time

for such a long time it's manifested because love is here

it's manifested because love is here

it's manifested because love is here cause it's nobody's business

cause it's nobody's business

cause it's nobody's business telling you who to love how to love

telling you who to love how to love

telling you who to love how to love nobody

nobody

nobody I want to welcome you Ty and you and

I want to welcome you Ty and you and

I want to welcome you Ty and you and your crazy kind of family the little

your crazy kind of family the little

your crazy kind of family the little difference a little different but you

difference a little different but you

difference a little different but you know what we're celebrating differences

know what we're celebrating differences

know what we're celebrating differences we're going to celebrate the differences

we're going to celebrate the differences

we're going to celebrate the differences because that's what life is that's what

because that's what life is that's what

because that's what life is that's what love is

love is

love is now who wants to go first when it comes

now who wants to go first when it comes

now who wants to go first when it comes to the vows

to the vows

to the vows well since this is our 50th time I think

well since this is our 50th time I think

well since this is our 50th time I think we'll just make ours short and sweet

we'll just make ours short and sweet

we'll just make ours short and sweet in my home state of Texas

in my home state of Texas

in my home state of Texas I take you

I take you

I take you Kyle Coleman to be my lawfully wedded

Kyle Coleman to be my lawfully wedded

Kyle Coleman to be my lawfully wedded husband

husband

husband again ditto

all right

all right

all right Princess Diana would approve the mount

Princess Diana would approve the mount

Princess Diana would approve the mount and Wardell

and Wardell

and Wardell do you take lavanda to be a lovely

do you take lavanda to be a lovely

do you take lavanda to be a lovely wedded wife

wedded wife

wedded wife I do

I do

I do look at him grinning yeah and miss

look at him grinning yeah and miss

look at him grinning yeah and miss lavanda

lavanda

lavanda do you you could just skip all that

do you you could just skip all that

do you you could just skip all that other [ __ ] because I do too the one

other [ __ ] because I do too the one

other [ __ ] because I do too the one that are the power's Best in Me

that are the power's Best in Me

that are the power's Best in Me I pronounce you husband and husband and

I pronounce you husband and husband and

I pronounce you husband and husband and husband and wife you may kiss your

husband and wife you may kiss your

husband and wife you may kiss your respective loved ones

respective loved ones

respective loved ones [Applause]

it's a [ __ ]

it's a [ __ ]

it's a [ __ ] [Music]

sorry

sorry

sorry sorry

[Music]

the tears welled up so high inside I

the tears welled up so high inside I

the tears welled up so high inside I thought that I might drown

thought that I might drown

thought that I might drown [Music]

[Music]

[Music] everything's different but it all looks

everything's different but it all looks

everything's different but it all looks the same

I just hope that they will see

I just hope that they will see

I just hope that they will see what is always

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] how much do I love you

how much do I love you

how much do I love you will they understand

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] always pretty and

always pretty and

always pretty and the time seems far but twins and turns

the time seems far but twins and turns

the time seems far but twins and turns to learn Growing Pains of scars

to learn Growing Pains of scars

to learn Growing Pains of scars but it's time for me to say this is Who

but it's time for me to say this is Who

but it's time for me to say this is Who We Are

when I was a small boy I never thought

when I was a small boy I never thought

when I was a small boy I never thought there'd be

there'd be

there'd be that perfect happy ending for anyone

that perfect happy ending for anyone

that perfect happy ending for anyone like me

like me

like me I could read the signals

I could read the signals

I could read the signals smiles and bless his hearts

smiles and bless his hearts

smiles and bless his hearts still hear the whisper the words that

still hear the whisper the words that

still hear the whisper the words that said I've never heard

said I've never heard

said I've never heard now I'm walking

now I'm walking

now I'm walking [Music]

[Music]

[Music] the strength of you and me

the strength of you and me

the strength of you and me [Music]

[Music]

[Music] do I love you

do I love you

do I love you will they understand

will they understand

will they understand everything it means for us to have those

everything it means for us to have those

everything it means for us to have those wedding bands

wedding bands

wedding bands you know it's pretty and home sometimes

you know it's pretty and home sometimes

you know it's pretty and home sometimes seems far with twists and turns

seems far with twists and turns

seems far with twists and turns let's learn

some scars

some scars

some scars but it's time for me to say

but it's time for me to say

but it's time for me to say this is Who We Are

this is Who We Are

this is Who We Are [Music]

[Music]

[Music] dance stood before you and I made that

dance stood before you and I made that

dance stood before you and I made that bow

bow

bow [Music]

[Music]

[Music] wasn't just a promise for the hearing

wasn't just a promise for the hearing

wasn't just a promise for the hearing now

now

now rings are just the start of all that we

rings are just the start of all that we

rings are just the start of all that we can be and I want the world to see

can be and I want the world to see

can be and I want the world to see because

because

because how much I love

what I miss