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1
00:00:06,280 --> 00:00:09,320
Daddy, paint the colors
of heaven with your tongue!
2
00:00:10,280 --> 00:00:11,880
I dreamed about this.
3
00:00:11,960 --> 00:00:13,400
Your whole life?
4
00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:14,920
Since fourth grade.
5
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:16,600
I teach fourth grade.
6
00:00:16,680 --> 00:00:17,680
What?
7
00:00:20,240 --> 00:00:21,560
-The janitor!
-What?
8
00:00:21,640 --> 00:00:22,560
The janitor!
9
00:00:23,840 --> 00:00:26,720
I don't get it, school is as terrible
10
00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:28,400
As the Xbox 360
11
00:00:28,480 --> 00:00:31,800
Stupid kids.
They leave their clothes everywhere.
12
00:00:31,880 --> 00:00:33,120
It's getting hotter.
13
00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:35,560
Those annoying kids
don't notice anything
14
00:00:35,640 --> 00:00:38,240
Princess Peach is hot
I'd like to fuck her
15
00:00:41,680 --> 00:00:44,520
Shit, shit, shit!
16
00:00:45,600 --> 00:00:47,440
I knew this wasn't a good idea!
17
00:00:47,520 --> 00:00:49,800
Hey! Calm down. Nothing happened.
18
00:00:49,880 --> 00:00:51,080
You really think so?
19
00:00:51,160 --> 00:00:53,800
I mean, where God locks a door...
20
00:00:55,200 --> 00:00:58,080
-he opens a window.
-It's the third floor.
21
00:00:59,280 --> 00:01:02,480
My kids will not scrape
our bodies off the schoolyard.
22
00:01:02,560 --> 00:01:03,880
Even if I lose my job.
23
00:01:03,960 --> 00:01:06,440
Okay, before you do that,
24
00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:07,640
shall we...
25
00:01:08,840 --> 00:01:09,680
at least...
26
00:01:11,680 --> 00:01:13,360
extinguish our fire?
27
00:01:14,080 --> 00:01:16,080
Something is very wrong with you.
28
00:01:22,840 --> 00:01:24,440
Insane situation, right?
29
00:01:24,520 --> 00:01:27,400
The fire brigade showed up
and we have smocks on.
30
00:01:27,480 --> 00:01:29,120
So embarrassing.
31
00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:32,880
Just to be clear,
my fantasy definitely had a different end.
32
00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:36,160
And? Did it cost the teacher her job?
33
00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:43,560
Yes.
34
00:01:44,240 --> 00:01:45,280
How do you feel?
35
00:01:46,920 --> 00:01:48,320
I didn't want that.
36
00:01:51,080 --> 00:01:55,760
I swore that after Stella, Milla,
I would take things
37
00:01:55,840 --> 00:01:57,280
slowly the next time...
38
00:01:57,360 --> 00:01:59,920
Sounds like you really took things slow.
39
00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:03,440
-It wasn't intentional.
-You accidentally fucked in a school?
40
00:02:03,520 --> 00:02:06,640
I was going to pick
Claudia up after work to...
41
00:02:06,720 --> 00:02:08,280
get to know her better.
42
00:02:08,360 --> 00:02:10,320
I didn't want to have sex!
43
00:02:11,280 --> 00:02:13,920
I saw the trap
when she stood in front of me.
44
00:02:15,160 --> 00:02:17,880
-She set a trap for him.
-Come on.
45
00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:20,320
Sex in a school? With a teacher?
46
00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:23,400
That's easily
top three on a sex bucket list.
47
00:02:23,440 --> 00:02:25,960
I had no choice! Fate shuffles the cards.
48
00:02:26,600 --> 00:02:28,760
-We play.
-That's really good, Ben.
49
00:02:28,840 --> 00:02:30,160
That's Schopenhauer.
50
00:02:30,240 --> 00:02:31,960
Yes, well spotted, Anja.
51
00:02:32,040 --> 00:02:33,240
I write too.
52
00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:35,280
Feminist texts.
53
00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:39,360
Sorry.
54
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:43,320
Though her body was brilliant
55
00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:47,640
She did not get a happy end
56
00:02:53,360 --> 00:02:54,960
That's feminist?
57
00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:57,280
Yes. I love women.
58
00:02:57,360 --> 00:03:00,520
You love sex.
There's definitely a difference.
59
00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:03,160
I live with a woman and we don't have sex.
60
00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:04,680
With your mother, right?
61
00:03:07,840 --> 00:03:09,960
-Well.
-Back to the classroom.
62
00:03:10,040 --> 00:03:13,280
Do you think that was
just about an unfulfilled fantasy?
63
00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:16,320
Sure.
64
00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:19,160
Okay.
65
00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:25,600
I recommend you do
a radical fasting cure for recovery.
66
00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:27,080
Purging?
67
00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:29,120
Abstinence.
68
00:03:29,200 --> 00:03:30,680
Sex vacation?
69
00:03:30,760 --> 00:03:32,040
A break.
70
00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:36,320
Yes, okay. Less is more.
71
00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:37,360
That's good.
72
00:03:42,160 --> 00:03:44,040
I'd try it for a week first.
73
00:03:46,840 --> 00:03:51,240
DIETER SEEMS LONELY-
74
00:03:51,320 --> 00:03:56,040
HE NEEDS CONTACT!
75
00:03:59,120 --> 00:04:01,360
My grandma isn't feeling so well.
76
00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:04,440
So this weekend
my parents are coming to town.
77
00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:07,360
They want to have
dinner with us and Yvonne...
78
00:04:07,440 --> 00:04:09,200
wants to ask for permission.
79
00:04:09,280 --> 00:04:10,680
To have dinner?
80
00:04:10,760 --> 00:04:12,280
To marry Dennis.
81
00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:17,000
Dennis? Do you know why our dear Dieter
82
00:04:17,120 --> 00:04:20,000
procrastinates successfully
here in his own gym?
83
00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:21,800
What?
84
00:04:22,240 --> 00:04:25,120
I mean, why he lets things slide?
85
00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:26,800
Why?
86
00:04:27,240 --> 00:04:29,120
He has to clean for his aunt.
87
00:04:29,200 --> 00:04:31,520
And he shares his car with his ex-wife.
88
00:04:31,600 --> 00:04:34,520
And his big sister
still buys his clothes for him.
89
00:04:36,120 --> 00:04:37,600
You mean I'm like Dieter?
90
00:04:38,560 --> 00:04:40,520
You're exactly like Dieter.
91
00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:44,120
You need an excuse.
92
00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:47,440
Tell Yvonne
you have to work on the weekend.
93
00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:52,800
A new project for the o:ha stuff
and then you just blame your boss for it.
94
00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:54,920
Hang on. You work at o:ha-Intim?
95
00:04:55,440 --> 00:04:58,240
The pussy cream company? I love them.
96
00:04:58,360 --> 00:05:02,000
Yes. I'm an intern so far...
97
00:05:03,080 --> 00:05:05,520
but also a product tester.
98
00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:08,320
For pussy creams?
99
00:05:08,360 --> 00:05:11,040
For intimate and vaginal cosmetics.
100
00:05:11,120 --> 00:05:16,240
My boss said I should climb the ladder
of success from the bottom rung.
101
00:05:16,360 --> 00:05:18,360
You've been there for a long time.
102
00:05:18,440 --> 00:05:21,800
I want to get into product development.
It's exciting.
103
00:05:21,880 --> 00:05:23,920
We work with vegan organic products
104
00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:26,600
and don't use any invertebrate materials.
105
00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:28,280
The lube is really awesome.
106
00:05:28,360 --> 00:05:30,120
It tingles nicely when you...
107
00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:33,760
What? I have sensitive butt skin.
108
00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:37,440
Okay.
109
00:05:37,520 --> 00:05:41,240
Yeah. After my flat burned down
because of the candles...
110
00:05:41,320 --> 00:05:43,360
You mean the wax psycho?
111
00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:45,800
Actually, he was really nice.
112
00:05:45,880 --> 00:05:46,720
Yes.
113
00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:51,760
Yet I believe Dieter
wouldn't want to change anything.
114
00:05:55,880 --> 00:05:56,800
Yes.
115
00:05:57,600 --> 00:06:02,360
So the wax man probably came
from a very problematic family situation.
116
00:06:03,640 --> 00:06:07,160
Now I moved into the youth hostel,
and I feel great there.
117
00:06:08,760 --> 00:06:10,040
-Youth hostel?
-Yes.
118
00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:12,440
Yes. I feel really great there.
119
00:06:13,280 --> 00:06:15,080
I'm learning to be grateful...
120
00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:18,080
Good. That's enough.
Now let's try something else.
121
00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:21,920
You're all here for a reason.
122
00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:24,560
Concentrate only on bobbing.
123
00:06:24,640 --> 00:06:26,120
Shut up, will you!
124
00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:28,080
When I throw the ball to you,
125
00:06:28,160 --> 00:06:31,200
I want to hear the reason.
Without thinking. Now!
126
00:06:32,080 --> 00:06:33,080
Romance.
127
00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:35,560
Tits.
128
00:06:36,640 --> 00:06:38,320
Yvonne and my mother.
129
00:06:38,840 --> 00:06:40,600
-What?
-Yvonne and my mother.
130
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:47,120
Zoé?
131
00:06:47,560 --> 00:06:48,440
No idea.
132
00:06:50,960 --> 00:06:51,920
Stand up.
133
00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:53,680
Stand up, now!
134
00:07:06,480 --> 00:07:07,520
What the hell?
135
00:07:09,960 --> 00:07:11,320
What just scared you?
136
00:07:15,520 --> 00:07:18,640
Romance, tits, Yvonne and your mother.
137
00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:21,360
We'll figure it out.
138
00:07:22,840 --> 00:07:24,080
See the connection?
139
00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:29,320
These issues are killing you, and yet...
140
00:07:29,400 --> 00:07:31,800
you give them a huge place in your life?
141
00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:35,600
Yes, fate shuffles the cards.
142
00:07:35,680 --> 00:07:39,240
And you decide how you play and with whom.
143
00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:42,120
And most importantly...
144
00:07:42,920 --> 00:07:45,200
a good player knows when to stop.
145
00:07:46,360 --> 00:07:47,320
Amen.
146
00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:49,320
A stop sign. Cool.
147
00:07:51,720 --> 00:07:52,760
Nele?
148
00:07:53,480 --> 00:07:54,920
Want to move in with me?
149
00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:57,800
-What?
-I have room, I live alone.
150
00:07:58,840 --> 00:08:00,320
And I'll allow closeness.
151
00:08:01,440 --> 00:08:02,920
That's it, right, Anja?
152
00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:05,720
Yes, I do.
153
00:08:08,640 --> 00:08:09,760
The new wind.
154
00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:14,480
Oh, guys.
155
00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:16,560
Nele, honestly.
156
00:08:17,320 --> 00:08:22,080
Is this thing with Zoé really a good idea?
I mean you're different.
157
00:08:22,160 --> 00:08:24,320
-It's a business relationship.
-Okay.
158
00:08:24,400 --> 00:08:28,640
We're not going to spend
evenings together on the sofa.
159
00:08:28,720 --> 00:08:31,560
We're not going to eat my favorite chips.
160
00:08:31,640 --> 00:08:32,760
ASHA: THX for the invitation.
161
00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:36,000
And we're not going to give
our vaginas funny names.
162
00:08:36,040 --> 00:08:37,400
The FemArt Collective
is looking forward to the gig.
163
00:08:37,480 --> 00:08:40,880
I'm not going near a vagina this weekend.
164
00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:42,960
I'll channel my feelings into art
165
00:08:43,040 --> 00:08:48,080
by organizing an art slam
for the FemArt Collective.
166
00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:49,200
You'll do what?
167
00:08:49,280 --> 00:08:51,120
-Abstain from sex.
-The other.
168
00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:54,000
I'll host an event
for the FemArt Collective.
169
00:08:54,080 --> 00:08:55,640
They do nice art slams.
170
00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:58,400
Those are feminists and you're a disaster.
171
00:08:58,480 --> 00:09:01,840
Maybe the old Ben was, okay?
But the new one,
172
00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:03,600
sees them as colleagues.
173
00:09:04,320 --> 00:09:07,400
Feminists plus poetry plus Ben...
174
00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:11,760
-I call it fate.
-I call it your funeral.
175
00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:46,400
Wow!
176
00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:51,160
Good morning,
dearest roommate in the world!
177
00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:54,960
What are you doing here?
What time is it anyway?
178
00:09:55,040 --> 00:10:00,520
Just the right time
to start our life together.
179
00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:05,880
Wait. You are moving in, like now?
180
00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:10,080
I couldn't stand it in the youth hostel
anymore. It was so messy...
181
00:10:12,520 --> 00:10:13,360
and dirty.
182
00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:14,440
Oh God.
183
00:10:15,040 --> 00:10:18,880
Shall we maybe make a toast first?
Prosecco?
184
00:10:19,880 --> 00:10:22,440
Or not. So do you often throw...
185
00:10:23,480 --> 00:10:24,320
parties here?
186
00:10:25,120 --> 00:10:26,760
This is my creative order.
187
00:10:27,280 --> 00:10:28,600
Do you bake with this?
188
00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:30,480
Not directly.
189
00:10:30,520 --> 00:10:33,320
And it's obviously not for you.
Give it to me.
190
00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:35,440
-Make me a coffee?
-Sure.
191
00:10:35,520 --> 00:10:37,240
Then we can talk about rent.
192
00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:39,040
-The rent?
-Yeah.
193
00:10:39,120 --> 00:10:41,840
-750 a month.
-Euro?
194
00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:43,440
No. Peseta.
195
00:10:45,280 --> 00:10:47,080
I really thought...
196
00:10:48,320 --> 00:10:49,400
Oh, it was a joke.
197
00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:50,720
Yes, this is Hamburg.
198
00:10:50,760 --> 00:10:53,760
Yes, business relationship.
Of course I pay.
199
00:10:53,840 --> 00:10:54,720
No problem.
200
00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:57,040
Of course.
201
00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:04,960
Good. Then we agree
and I'll just clean up here later and...
202
00:11:05,880 --> 00:11:08,560
I'm going to work now.
We have a huge event.
203
00:11:08,640 --> 00:11:11,960
200 people and a breathtaking wedding.
204
00:11:13,320 --> 00:11:15,400
Do I get my own key?
205
00:11:17,680 --> 00:11:20,080
Sure. You can look for it yourself.
206
00:11:21,720 --> 00:11:23,840
Those stupid things hide from me.
207
00:11:28,560 --> 00:11:30,840
This feels like winning the lottery.
208
00:11:37,560 --> 00:11:38,600
Take care...
209
00:11:39,520 --> 00:11:41,200
best roommate in the world.
210
00:11:42,800 --> 00:11:44,520
I'll be back at five! Bye!
211
00:11:53,440 --> 00:11:56,440
Lovely fiancé, where are you?
I got our lunch.
212
00:12:05,560 --> 00:12:09,600
I finished writing
the speech for your mother.
213
00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:13,560
She won't be able to say no.
Just like you. My raccoon.
214
00:12:19,080 --> 00:12:22,640
The secret covenant
of those who found a partner for life.
215
00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:28,400
Speaking of dying...
216
00:12:29,840 --> 00:12:31,560
Don't you have the feeling...
217
00:12:32,400 --> 00:12:33,280
we're young.
218
00:12:34,640 --> 00:12:36,000
And...
219
00:12:38,440 --> 00:12:40,120
We have to cancel dinner.
220
00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:43,800
-What?
-I have to work.
221
00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:46,120
A huge project.
222
00:12:47,480 --> 00:12:48,560
It's Mina's fault.
223
00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:54,200
You've never had
to work on the weekend before.
224
00:12:55,880 --> 00:12:57,920
True. But...
225
00:12:59,920 --> 00:13:03,680
I want to climb up the ladder,
so I have to show commitment.
226
00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:06,280
On the weekend.
227
00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:08,480
This weekend.
228
00:13:08,560 --> 00:13:10,120
Is this about the wedding?
229
00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:11,920
What? No.
230
00:13:16,520 --> 00:13:19,240
Come on, Dennis.
You can't fool me. I know you.
231
00:13:23,480 --> 00:13:25,680
I am so proud of you.
232
00:13:26,320 --> 00:13:29,240
My honey bear finally
wants to earn his own money!
233
00:13:31,200 --> 00:13:32,080
So...
234
00:13:32,160 --> 00:13:34,000
you get yourself a promotion
235
00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:37,840
and then I'll ask
your mother for your hand in marriage.
236
00:13:40,760 --> 00:13:42,200
That's how we do it.
237
00:13:43,240 --> 00:13:44,160
Thanks.
238
00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:48,240
This really is my chance
to prove myself, right?
239
00:13:48,680 --> 00:13:50,800
Although, the task, it's really...
240
00:13:51,480 --> 00:13:52,800
For a wombat like me,
241
00:13:53,640 --> 00:13:55,000
it's almost impossible.
242
00:13:55,800 --> 00:13:57,360
I hope I don't mess it up.
243
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:02,000
No.
244
00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:03,800
No?
245
00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:06,560
No.
246
00:14:07,040 --> 00:14:08,960
You need me. I'll go with you.
247
00:14:10,280 --> 00:14:12,080
No, that's not possible.
248
00:14:12,160 --> 00:14:14,520
Don't argue. Your path is also my path.
249
00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:20,600
Come on.
250
00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:44,120
1.80 meters? On stilts maybe.
251
00:14:44,680 --> 00:14:46,600
Short, but hard
like stone...
252
00:14:46,680 --> 00:14:48,000
and you wanted
distraction
253
00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:55,520
You little pig. Interested in role play?
254
00:15:05,160 --> 00:15:08,080
You don't know it closes at five.
Close the door.
255
00:15:08,720 --> 00:15:11,920
Last time you were at day care
was four years ago, Jan!
256
00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:13,680
Typical Jan!
257
00:15:15,240 --> 00:15:17,960
My mother will pick them up.
It doesn't matter.
258
00:15:18,040 --> 00:15:19,560
She's used to filling in.
259
00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:21,880
Good-for-nothing.
260
00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:22,920
Idiot!
261
00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:26,240
Why do men have to be so useless?
262
00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:29,480
Well, Dennis? What's new?
263
00:15:30,120 --> 00:15:32,320
Or did someone forget you too?
264
00:15:32,400 --> 00:15:33,720
I can pick up myself.
265
00:15:34,840 --> 00:15:35,760
I wanted to...
266
00:15:37,600 --> 00:15:38,680
I wanted to ask if
267
00:15:38,760 --> 00:15:41,760
I could work this weekend
because of this project.
268
00:15:41,840 --> 00:15:44,040
We don't. And even if...
269
00:15:45,080 --> 00:15:46,400
you're just an intern.
270
00:15:46,480 --> 00:15:49,200
That's right.
But I'd like to prove myself.
271
00:15:49,280 --> 00:15:53,080
So I would like to make an effort
for o:ha Intim and for you.
272
00:15:53,840 --> 00:15:56,720
You have problems at home.
I know how that is.
273
00:15:57,160 --> 00:16:00,560
-I have problems with my Jan.
-Your partner's named Jan?
274
00:16:00,640 --> 00:16:01,720
No, Yvonne.
275
00:16:02,320 --> 00:16:03,960
But if it would help you,
276
00:16:04,040 --> 00:16:06,880
because it would help me,
if I could show you,
277
00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:08,640
how useful men can be. So...
278
00:16:11,760 --> 00:16:13,480
Despite having a girlfriend...
279
00:16:13,560 --> 00:16:16,840
you want to work
on the weekend to prove to me how
280
00:16:17,800 --> 00:16:19,080
useful a man can be?
281
00:16:20,880 --> 00:16:22,960
Please. I'll do anything you want.
282
00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:26,440
-Are you serious?
-Absolutely, yes.
283
00:16:28,160 --> 00:16:32,080
-This never happened to me before.
-You've never given me a chance.
284
00:16:32,640 --> 00:16:33,640
You know what?
285
00:16:36,920 --> 00:16:37,880
Why not?
286
00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:42,000
Prove it to me.
287
00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:45,640
You will not regret it. I promise.
288
00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:47,000
I very much hope so.
289
00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:50,760
The new vaginal creams need to be tested.
290
00:16:50,840 --> 00:16:55,680
Great! I honestly find
our products really awesome.
291
00:16:55,760 --> 00:16:56,800
That stuff is crap!
292
00:16:56,880 --> 00:16:59,560
People go crazy
because it says vegan on it.
293
00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:02,880
But you are right.
Jan really is a problem.
294
00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:05,840
And I deserve better.
295
00:17:07,920 --> 00:17:08,840
Me too.
296
00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:14,400
I'm home, roomie!
297
00:17:17,280 --> 00:17:21,320
I got us some wine and chips.
And I thought that...
298
00:17:22,080 --> 00:17:25,080
-Why are you here?
-I need to read the water meter.
299
00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:26,640
The door was open, so...
300
00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:28,680
You come in while I'm showering?
301
00:17:28,760 --> 00:17:30,560
I have to read the meter.
302
00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:32,320
-Scumbag.
-You're crazy.
303
00:17:33,280 --> 00:17:35,480
-Help!
-Now hold still!
304
00:17:40,680 --> 00:17:42,440
FIRE EXTINGUISHER
305
00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:47,520
Yes!
306
00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:51,080
-Come on! Stand still!
-Oh, God! Please!
307
00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:54,320
You are a dirty little pig.
308
00:17:54,800 --> 00:17:56,200
Help! Help!
309
00:17:56,280 --> 00:17:58,760
Zoé, I'll save you! Eat that, you asshole!
310
00:18:16,320 --> 00:18:17,280
Shit!
311
00:18:19,480 --> 00:18:20,880
Oh, man!
312
00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:33,320
Do you want coffee?
313
00:18:40,680 --> 00:18:44,040
Look, about yesterday,
I'm really sorry. Okay?
314
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:48,040
-I'm just...
-Psycho?
315
00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:51,080
I know. I saw it.
316
00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:52,680
Break the habit.
317
00:18:56,800 --> 00:18:58,440
Get a new extinguisher.
318
00:19:03,960 --> 00:19:07,080
And try not to kill anyone
while I'm gone. Okay?
319
00:19:20,320 --> 00:19:23,000
Jerry! Have you
hung up all the breasts yet?
320
00:19:23,080 --> 00:19:24,320
I think we need more.
321
00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:26,440
Are you Ben?
322
00:19:26,720 --> 00:19:29,920
Yo! Ben, king of men.
323
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,080
Asha. The main organizer.
324
00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:38,200
You make the organization
for the ladies convention by selection
325
00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:41,560
You would make a great poet.
326
00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:44,080
I write stuff here and there.
327
00:19:44,880 --> 00:19:47,680
It looks awesome in here!
328
00:19:47,760 --> 00:19:48,920
Thanks a lot, Ben.
329
00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:52,720
You're welcome. That's what feminists
330
00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:54,480
-should do.
-You, a feminist?
331
00:19:54,560 --> 00:19:57,320
Yes. Sure!
332
00:19:57,400 --> 00:19:59,680
I love equality,
333
00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:04,560
-218?
-218.
334
00:20:04,680 --> 00:20:06,040
Two-one-eight. Sure.
335
00:20:06,080 --> 00:20:07,960
-How many women work here?
-Women?
336
00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:09,160
Yes.
337
00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:14,280
Women are all in management here.
338
00:20:15,080 --> 00:20:16,920
They're in the executive chair.
339
00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:20,320
Yeah. We men are at the front
340
00:20:20,440 --> 00:20:21,920
and we take care of the...
341
00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:24,720
guests.
342
00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:27,320
-Male and female guests.
-Right. All right.
343
00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:33,320
See you around.
344
00:20:47,520 --> 00:20:49,280
Dude, what?
345
00:20:49,320 --> 00:20:50,560
Surprise!
346
00:20:50,640 --> 00:20:53,080
-You've been kondoed.
-Kon-what?
347
00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:55,560
Kondoed.
348
00:20:55,960 --> 00:20:59,760
Organizing one's home is the magic
that creates a happy life.
349
00:21:03,800 --> 00:21:06,200
Everything's clean and organized.
350
00:21:06,280 --> 00:21:10,560
Because a chaotic room
reflects a chaotic soul.
351
00:21:11,400 --> 00:21:15,560
And now there's
really good energy in here.
352
00:21:15,680 --> 00:21:16,920
For us.
353
00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:18,800
Oh, yeah.
354
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:22,240
Does it make you happy?
355
00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:25,720
-That's my asstray.
-Exactly.
356
00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:29,160
Look! Here. Here you go.
357
00:21:29,240 --> 00:21:32,400
Red means: "Stop, privacy."
358
00:21:32,480 --> 00:21:35,480
And green means: "Welcome, roomie!"
359
00:21:37,160 --> 00:21:39,080
You don't have to lock the door.
360
00:21:39,160 --> 00:21:40,680
-Unbelievable.
-Right?
361
00:21:40,760 --> 00:21:42,560
-It's great.
-No.
362
00:21:42,640 --> 00:21:43,680
No!
363
00:21:43,760 --> 00:21:47,560
It looks like IKEA fucked
a sterile infirmary, and had a baby.
364
00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:48,480
And this?
365
00:21:49,080 --> 00:21:51,600
I need your permission for nothing.
366
00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:52,960
Hands off my shit.
367
00:21:56,680 --> 00:21:58,200
Where are the glasses?
368
00:21:58,280 --> 00:22:00,520
I probably shouldn't have moved in!
369
00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:02,240
Probably? Definitely!
370
00:22:06,880 --> 00:22:09,120
Why is Tobi doing in the dishwasher?
371
00:22:15,120 --> 00:22:17,920
I say true feminism...
372
00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:20,560
also fights for BIPOCs.
373
00:22:21,760 --> 00:22:25,240
Also fights for LGBTQAI-plus.
374
00:22:25,320 --> 00:22:26,360
For FLINTAs.
375
00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:30,520
And most of all
for non-binary and trans people.
376
00:22:33,160 --> 00:22:36,480
-We are not this. We are not that.
-What do you think?
377
00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:43,720
I think so too.
Wait till you see the next act.
378
00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:48,240
Today we're free of gender construct.
379
00:23:00,320 --> 00:23:02,480
Look at me, feel me
380
00:23:03,520 --> 00:23:06,240
I'm Asha
I exist
381
00:23:07,400 --> 00:23:09,680
A feminist without crap
382
00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:13,880
I know who I am
My conscience is clear
383
00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:17,720
I announce the happy ending
Nipplegate was my fate
384
00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:22,240
You unpack your dick, your balls
I show you my nipples
385
00:23:22,320 --> 00:23:25,120
You say I talk like a man
I talk like a queen
386
00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:28,840
Listen and look closely
387
00:23:29,880 --> 00:23:32,000
Or are you afraid?
388
00:23:32,080 --> 00:23:33,400
Afraid to lose control
389
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:34,880
My breasts give milk
390
00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:37,160
Women are special
391
00:23:37,240 --> 00:23:38,720
We can lactate
392
00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:42,640
Does the cow need to hide?
393
00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:48,240
I know the topic is important,
but she should leave cows out of it.
394
00:23:48,320 --> 00:23:49,760
No, you don't get it.
395
00:23:49,840 --> 00:23:53,120
It's about the constant battle
between cock and vagina.
396
00:23:53,200 --> 00:23:54,760
Put your dicks away
397
00:23:54,840 --> 00:23:59,400
The tits are taking over
Tell your sons
398
00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:01,280
To behave themselves
We decide
399
00:24:01,360 --> 00:24:04,040
What we do with our tits
400
00:24:04,120 --> 00:24:06,920
As it's anti-woman
As it's anti-human
401
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:08,040
So let's say
402
00:24:08,120 --> 00:24:11,720
Animals that suck
Open your eyes
403
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:17,480
Free the nipples!
404
00:24:24,360 --> 00:24:26,440
I wasn't expecting that.
405
00:24:27,400 --> 00:24:28,600
That's art.
406
00:25:13,880 --> 00:25:17,760
So that your keys
don't always hide from you.
407
00:25:17,840 --> 00:25:19,240
Your friend, Nele
408
00:25:31,160 --> 00:25:32,560
Yes, I love how I am
409
00:25:32,640 --> 00:25:34,680
Heavy bones
That's fat
410
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:36,520
44 plus
That's fine
411
00:25:36,600 --> 00:25:38,520
Fits to the beat
412
00:25:38,600 --> 00:25:40,680
Love the dents
Your fat ass
413
00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:42,200
So let me bark
414
00:25:42,280 --> 00:25:45,800
Sexual, sit on my face
Geek machine
415
00:25:45,880 --> 00:25:47,840
Dream guys
416
00:25:47,920 --> 00:25:49,480
Fat queen
417
00:25:49,560 --> 00:25:53,960
Finger-licking good like whipped cream
418
00:25:54,040 --> 00:25:57,720
Fit, thick, skin-tight jeans
419
00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:05,960
Give it up for Keke!
420
00:26:08,040 --> 00:26:09,760
But before we close here
421
00:26:09,840 --> 00:26:13,640
we'd like to invite to the stage
the one who invited us to this.
422
00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:17,000
And from what we've heard he also does
423
00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:25,240
Ben! Ben!
424
00:26:25,320 --> 00:26:27,840
-No, Ben. You can't.
-Ben!
425
00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:31,920
-Ben!
-Come on. It's okay.
426
00:26:37,440 --> 00:26:40,320
Finally, a hot jerk we can objectify.
427
00:26:43,360 --> 00:26:45,440
-I'm Ben.
-Hi, Ben.
428
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:50,320
-King of men at the poetry slam.
-King of men!
429
00:26:56,360 --> 00:26:58,560
Freedom-seeking.
430
00:26:58,640 --> 00:27:01,760
Feminism-loving.
431
00:27:01,840 --> 00:27:05,560
I'm the beau. I'm the bro.
432
00:27:05,640 --> 00:27:09,480
Women-understander with standards.
433
00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:10,720
What is he doing?
434
00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:13,720
-Ridiculous.
-I love you women, my kryptonite,
435
00:27:13,800 --> 00:27:16,920
My knees...
436
00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:19,400
-go weak when I see you.
-Cringe.
437
00:27:19,480 --> 00:27:23,480
The reason why I get up in the morning.
438
00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:31,120
-What is he thinking?
-This is shit.
439
00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:55,600
Honestly?
440
00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:00,640
I'm no master.
441
00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:04,160
For women, I'm a disaster.
442
00:28:05,840 --> 00:28:07,520
A friend of mine told me so.
443
00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:09,200
And then I got it too.
444
00:28:12,360 --> 00:28:13,960
I'm a construction project.
445
00:28:28,880 --> 00:28:30,040
Cool, dude.
446
00:28:39,240 --> 00:28:40,080
Yes, Ben!
447
00:28:40,160 --> 00:28:43,000
Hand me the test
Sex ban until the end of life
448
00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:46,120
I think it's pretty hot
449
00:28:46,200 --> 00:28:48,120
Because I believe in freedom for
450
00:28:48,200 --> 00:28:49,040
All!
451
00:28:49,120 --> 00:28:51,520
Hey women
We can rely on you
452
00:28:58,040 --> 00:28:59,320
Ben!
453
00:28:59,880 --> 00:29:01,480
Hey, we are all just fruit
454
00:29:01,560 --> 00:29:03,720
And that's the truth
455
00:29:03,800 --> 00:29:06,480
Some have peaches
And some have bananas
456
00:29:07,120 --> 00:29:09,560
Fruit salad is the best mix ever
457
00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:11,560
Hey, folks, nobody can deny that
458
00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:13,920
Fruit salad!
459
00:29:14,000 --> 00:29:16,920
Assassination
Meat salad
460
00:29:17,000 --> 00:29:20,640
Fruit salad!
461
00:29:30,000 --> 00:29:32,720
Yeah, Magic Ben, show us!
462
00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:46,920
At least you haven't had sex.
463
00:29:48,800 --> 00:29:52,200
The ending was embarrassing,
but the beginning was...
464
00:29:54,640 --> 00:29:56,200
kind of embarrassing too.
465
00:29:56,720 --> 00:29:58,000
But honest too.
466
00:29:59,960 --> 00:30:01,280
Anja would be proud.
467
00:30:11,840 --> 00:30:12,840
Listen...
468
00:30:14,560 --> 00:30:16,240
I don't say it often...
469
00:30:17,880 --> 00:30:20,120
But I'm sorry. Okay?
470
00:30:22,960 --> 00:30:25,000
You're a good roommate.
471
00:30:28,280 --> 00:30:29,920
Slightly invasive.
472
00:30:30,760 --> 00:30:36,120
Especially when you're in my bathroom
like a psycho with a fire extinguisher.
473
00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:38,560
I kind of respect that too.
474
00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:46,040
Will you please move back in?
475
00:30:46,120 --> 00:30:46,960
Yes.
476
00:30:52,040 --> 00:30:56,600
Hey, Ben.
How are things with your fruit salad?
477
00:30:57,120 --> 00:30:58,600
Fruit salad is sold out.
478
00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:01,400
Fruit salad.
479
00:31:11,440 --> 00:31:14,280
How am I supposed to test
vag rejuvenation cream?
480
00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:19,200
I think I have an idea how.
481
00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:25,960
What are you doing?
482
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:32,920
I...
483
00:31:43,200 --> 00:31:44,280
Take a second one.
484
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:08,600
The cleaners?
485
00:32:15,720 --> 00:32:17,520
You really came.
486
00:32:17,600 --> 00:32:20,000
To be honest, I wasn't so sure you would.
487
00:32:21,440 --> 00:32:23,360
You already got the cream ready.
488
00:32:23,440 --> 00:32:28,200
Let's get on with the rejuvenating.
Things must be going really badly at home.
489
00:32:28,960 --> 00:32:30,720
With your girlfriend.
490
00:32:32,480 --> 00:32:34,360
You mean with his fiancée?
491
00:32:34,880 --> 00:32:38,600
And if Dennis is going
to rejuvenate anyone's vagina, it's mine.
492
00:33:33,360 --> 00:33:35,360
Translated by Jill Heather Schmidt
31440
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