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That's her, all right.

Captain...

Why don't we just go in there and pull her out?

It's the mayor's daughter, Harris.

One false move and the whole thing crumbles.

The ransom note said the place was booby-trapped.

We go waltzing in there, house goes boom,

dead mayor's daughter. Not on my watch.

I guess it's up to Garrett now.

Unfortunately.

You don't think he's up to it?

It's a simple money exchange.

He takes the money to the warehouse.

The kidnappers tell us the safe way in. Yeah, he's up to it.

The problem is, he'll do it his way.

Sam Garrett always has to do it his way.

Man: we should keep all the money,

let that little bitch stew inside the house.

No way. We don't fuck the boss.

We follow the plan, or it's our asses.

How are you doing?

I wasn't supposed to hear that little interchange, was I?

Well, you know, actually--

What the fuck was that?

Come on. Let's check it.

( engine starts )

Go, go!

Is this Compton or East LA?

Gotta be Compton.

( gunfire continues )

( hissing )

Aaah!

Something's wrong. I can feel it.

( horn honking )

( honking )

( gunfire )

This is not good.

That's it! I'm moving to Lauderdale!

- Something's happening. - What is it?

I don't know.

I can't see her anymore.

( helicopter overhead )

You didn't make the exchange.

I don't have time to explain.

- You're ad-libbing again, Sam. - Yeah, I know.

- Is the girl still in there? - We don't know.

I would like to know why you've chosen once again to directly disobey--

Where the hell do you think you're going?!

Son of a...

( helicopter whirrs )

( muffled noise )

( ringing )

( ringing )

Oh, you bastards. Fuck the boss.

Sam: My, my, my.

What language you young people use.

You learn to talk like that in private school?

Or just how to shake down your old man?

- A phony kidnap scheme. - Do you know who I am?

I'm the fucking mayor's daughter.

You have the right to remain silent,

which I suggest you do.

- You can't do this to me! - Well, I'm doing it.

What is it? You get the call after the money drop,

disappear, and then it's "missing and presumed dead"?

Is that it?

There's a bomb on that table.

I know it's a bomb. I've seen millions of these.

Look-- Start, stop.

Stop.

No stop?

Get down! Get down!

Here they come.

Sam: get down!

( people yelling )

What the fuck is going on?

Get the cuffs off of her.

Captain, she staged this whole thing.

- They're hurting me. - Shut up.

That's the mayor's daughter. The kidnap victim.

You got proof? You got witnesses? Anything?

- Where's my father? - I said, shut up.

Captain...

Captain, listen.

I'm going through a transitional period in my life right now.

I need to know that both emotionally and financially,

I'm going to have the continued

and unwavering support of the LAPD.

- You're full of shit. - I know.

I've got no options. I've got to investigate.

It's political. She's the mayor's daughter.

That's what she said when she blew up the house.

Take unpaid suspension, collect unemployment.

That's the best I can do until I sort this out.

Let me take the case and I can sort it out.

- I can't do that! - There's perps out there with submachine guns!

She wasn't in this thing alone.

Sam, you'd be a hell of a cop except for one thing--

You do not know when to quit.

Where's my dad?

Both: Shut up!

( ringing )

Yeah.

Female voice: this is Ready Credit calling for Sam Garrett.

( fake Chinese accent ) Oh-- Mr. Garrett, he no here!

He go very far away!

Long, long trip!

Two, maybe three month! Yeah.

Call back two, maybe three month. Thank you. Bye bye.

Female voice: I need to leave him a message, sir.

( wrapper crinkling )

Go away! Nobody's home.

Breaking and entering is against the law, you know.

Want a beer?

You need to upgrade your lifestyle a bit.

I can't afford a lifestyle, thanks to you.

What's the story on the mayor's daughter?

Nothing.

She's in therapy. We can't get at the case files.

So basically, I'm screwed.

Be patient, son. In the meantime,

I've got a proposition for you.

How would you like to become a big TV star?

"The world's drunkest out-of-work cops"?

Captain: I'm serious, Sam.

I've got a friend who's producing

one of these new reality TV shows.

You know, a bunch of idiots stuck on an island together.

I know. The winner gets to be on "Celebrity Checkers"

and the loser goes on the Shopping Channel.

I don't think so, Ellis.

Look.

His cast is not playing well with the test audiences.

They're not heroic enough.

He thought if he could add a real live, red-blooded,

all-American cop into the mix, he could improve his demographics.

He asked me if I could spare one. You I can spare.

What's the pay?

The grand prize is 10 million bucks--

If you win.

Plus, you get 30 grand to spend one week

in a tropical Pacific paradise.

Why me? What's the catch?

There's no catch. The producer is a friend of mine.

That's very nice, Captain. I appreciate your generosity.

But what's in it for you?

All right.

The same producer has made me a tentative offer.

You've got to keep this to yourself.

My landlord and I aren't speaking. Who am I going to tell?

I am going to be the new host

of "The World's Biggest Police Busts."

It's a great salary, it's a nice nest egg.

Do me this favor, and I will find a way

to get you back on the force, with full back pay.

Let me think about it.

( phone rings )

Recording: This is Garrett, leave a message.

Female voice: This is the Acme Finance Company, Mr. Garrett.

We would appreciate it if you'd call us--

( machine stops )

What's the show called?

"Treasure Hunt."

Host: A tropical island-- Beautiful sandy beaches,

fabulous Pacific sunsets,

waves lapping upon silky untrodden shores.

And hidden somewhere among it all...

$10 million in cash.

Now, let's meet our contestants:

here comes Mindi Rain,

professional fashion model from Chicago;

John Turner, a security guard from Texas.

The lovely Tina Mason

works in a Los Angeles used record store

and rescues stray dogs in her spare time.

Phillip Edwards, retired Navy SEAL

with three tours of duty in Vietnam,

and the beautiful Kim Nelson, a teacher from New York

who owns her own school.

How about that Steven Chaney?

A newspaper reporter with a degree in English Literature.

Susan Billings, a stockbroker

and marathon runner,

and a genuine American hero,

detective Sam Garrett, on special leave

from the LAPD.

Modern day pirates, stranded on a deserted island.

One week to stay alive, or maybe die trying.

And they're all here for-- A "Treasure Hunt"!

That's right.

I like that.

God, we look great.

Speak for yourself.

I don't know, I thought you looked stunning.

Yeah, really hot.

Why don't you boys put your brains

back in your pants, where they belong,

and we'll all get along just fine.

- Thanks for the help, pal. - What did I say?

( glass clinking )

You people--

The most famous people on network television.

In less than 24 hours, you're gonna be marooned

on a beautiful island paradise.

And here's executive producer, Stuart McMahon,

to tell you why.

- Thanks, Jack. - You bet.

And thank all of you for joining our treasure hunt.

I'm very glad you're here.

And I think we all know why we've come.

For $10 million, in cash,

buried somewhere on Palm Key Island.

You will all be given treasure maps

with certain key clues missing,

and a piece of parchment, with a pirate's poem.

These final clues, they might be the ones

that help you land the treasure.

It's all in your travel bags.

Good hunting,

and try to stay alive.

What do they mean, "try to stay alive"?

I wasn't aware of anything in our contract

that would allow you to put us in any kind of danger.

No, no. It's all in good fun, Ms. Mason.

- Jack, explain. - Certainly, Stu.

We have hired our own...

"Pirates."

They're ex-Navy SEALs,

and their job is to take you all

out of the hunt.

They're silent and deadly.

You will not hear a sound until they take you down.

You sure this isn't cable?

Oh, no. It's perfectly harmless.

They carry paintball guns.

The paintballs just sting a little bit.

Besides, we can't really let them kill you,

because this show airs during the family hour.

That's it folks. Eat, drink, enjoy--

This is the last good meal you're gonna have in days.

Congratulations.

Can I talk to you for a minute, Stuart?

Yeah, sure.

If this is about another cash advance--

- No, no, Stu. - Forget it.

I'm not helping you out of any more financial messes.

I got you this job, that's enough.

I'm not going to ask you for more money, Stu.

I've got everything taken care of now.

I want to thank you... For your generosity.

Okay. That's fine. I'm glad to do it.

Anyway, get to bed, all right?

You've got a busy day tomorrow.

Everything's taken care of, Stu.

Thank you.

Thanks.

I'm sorry about that exchange at the table.

I got a little annoyed at that Turner guy.

That's all right. He just had too much to drink.

As a matter of fact, so have I.

You meant well and it was a nice thing to say.

I shouldn't have overreacted.

It's the world we live in. If I had done that in the workplace,

you could have me fired for sexual harassment.

For the next week, this is the workplace.

And in my office you can say anything you'd like.

It just better be good.

I'll do my best.

So, why are you doing this?

I was running low on beer and hot dogs.

How about you? Looking for your 15 minutes?

Maybe.

This is gonna be a boatload of fun.

You folks ready to get it on?

Turner: this isn't exactly what I expected.

This isn't what we saw last night.

Can't we wait until it's nice?

You want nice? Go on vacation.

This is national television. We got six days.

That helicopter is heading to the other side of the island,

where the showers, the wet bar, and the hot food are located.

The first to find the treasure gets to enjoy that side,

until the chopper takes you back to civilization.

Some of us have jet lag and a little hangover.

What's to keep us from hiking to the other side

and taking a nap and a shower?

We do have you outnumbered.

And we sign the paychecks.

Remember that. Play along. Enjoy yourselves.

The crew and I will stay with you at base camp,

through the trees.

And I can promise you that our huts,

well, at least mine,

is just a little bit nicer than yours.

How nice?

We have to maintain climate control in my hut.

That's where the satellite uplink

is located for the day's tape.

We're going to be shooting videotape of all of you

as you get used to your surroundings and start the treasure hunt.

I promise you. You're gonna forget we're even there.

All right? Let's make some TV!

Come on!

Watch it up ahead. It's narrow, okay?

I don't want to lose any of you right off the bat.

Let's go!

- Come on! Move it! - We're coming!

How are you gonna survive a week like this?

What's with all these huts?

Why so many? There must be 50 of them.

Ladies and gentleman, these huts were built for last year's

multimillion dollar blockbuster hit--

"Monkey See, Monkey Do."

- I hated that movie. - At least they're still standing.

All right, it's time for you to split into teams.

Start strategizing.

Let's find some treasure!

Strategizing?

That's probably the longest word he knows.

All right, teams, come on.

This is going to be a piece of cake.

I've seen guys like this in the service. They're wimps.

Since you've made me the team leader,

I think we should come up with a plan.

If we're going to play, we might as well play hard.

This is war. Let's huddle up.

No touching.

Only my dogs get to do that.

It's just instinct. I'm a herding animal.

Relax. He's being cute.

Gender traitor.

Oh, God!

I think she digs me.

It's a good start.

Julie?

- What satellite are we bouncing off of? - Westar 3.

I'm rolling the show open now for levels.

Give me a schedule rundown.

7:00 p.m.-- Jack sends the unedited video

from today's tape to us via satellite uplink.

We'll start cutting into the first episode for airing on Friday.

Jack does a live stand-up Friday with the cast to close the show.

And what about tonight's show?

Tonight's episode is a bio piece,

scheduled to promote the Friday premiere.

So we've got edited interviews,

B-rolls on contestants, profiles, etcetera.

That's all tape. I want something live tonight.

Already taken care of. We'll cut to a live shot

of the island, followed by some of today's tape.

Don't give away any secrets.

No, no, it's video of the contestants on the beach,

moving into their huts, stuff like that.

Call Jack. See if he can do a live stand-up intro

to tonight's show.

More immediacy. That's what we need.

I don't know if he can. The island's got bars up.

I'm getting a little noise. I can't guarantee a clean signal.

- It must be the weather. - I didn't know we were expecting any.

All right, I'll go see Bill at the forecast center.

All right.

Summer of 1968-- That was the last one?

All right. Thanks, Danny.

All right, Bill. Tell me some good news.

I've got my eye on a system.

A big weather system just east of Midway.

Is it a storm?

It will be as soon as this small air mass

from the south hits the main front-- Then boom.

- But it's not a storm. - No. Not yet.

Just give it time.

You just tell me when it is a storm, will you?

The ratings for the pre-show special were through the roof.

I'll be damned if I'm going to blow that on a few drops of rain.

Hell, a typhoon will be good for the ratings.

Big waves mean big numbers.

I'm not sure we can justify risking people's lives over ratings.

It ain't "we," it's me.

Our audience wants to see these people in jeopardy.

They want to see the cast picked off one by one.

And I always give my audience what they want.

If you're not careful, they're all gonna get

picked off that island, at once.

Hey.

Drinking?

It gets me through the day.

Day's over.

You see? It works.

- What are you reading? - It's Bloody Morgan's biography.

He wrote it himself in an English prison.

All these pirates fancied themselves poets.

I guess on-board ship there was nothing better to do.

Except each other. What's it got to do with us?

They like to sprinkle clues

into the verses.

Like, "A place for stout ship and sail,

where the four winds never find.

Due west from Kingston jail,

golden bounty in kind."

It's a description of a lagoon, surrounded by palm trees,

off the coast of Jamaica.

It's where Bloody Morgan's treasure was buried.

The same kind of clues in this parchment.

You think understanding this pirate stuff

is gonna help you find the treasure?

It could.

I don't know. It's a theory.

But if I work this out properly,

we could get to that treasure before anyone else.

If I were you, I'd keep it to myself.

You've got to be careful what you say around here.

There's a lot of money at stake.

As a cop you develop an instinct about people?

Sort of a feeling in your gut?

Sometimes.

Usually it just turns out to be gas.

But I think it's still safe to be suspicious of everybody.

As a matter of fact,

for the next couple of weeks,

I think a little paranoia is justifiable.

You know what I mean?

Gotcha.

You really lord this police stuff over all of us, don't you?

Just because you're team leader? I hate cops.

Everybody hates cops.

I hate cops.

I saw what you did to that man. You scared him to death.

Am I forgetting something?

Aren't you and I supposed to be on the same team?

You saw everybody listening to us.

Your cash split would be better if you slimmed down the team.

Get that poor man so paranoid,

one of those ex-Navy SEALs gets him.

I suppose you've made your alliance

with your favorite cast members--

Like that Susan bitch.

You know, Tina,

you've been watching way too much reality TV.

Whatever.

- Just a second. - Sure.

Do you think there's a storm coming?

I don't know.

Clouds are coming in. It's getting windy.

I can hear the breakers building. Could be.

So, what was that all about?

I don't know. Either she's in a real bad mood today,

or she doesn't like me very much.

Tina? Nah.

She's young, but she's harmless.

Really?

She just called you "that Susan bitch."

She did?

Accused me of spreading dissension and anger

among the contestants.

Maybe we should form an alliance.

Susan!

You like me! You really like me!

Not particularly.

But as team leader, you have your uses.

If you go down, I'll shed a tear.

But just one.

Think about it.

Bill: Right here.

Just west of Lisianski Island.

These two systems will probably hit near Midway.

Form the biggest hurricane to hit the Pacific in years.

And head in what direction?

North by northwest. Straight for Palm Key.

So the cast and crew are definitely in danger.

- Have you told Stuart? - Didn't do any good.

His attitude was, "So what if they're stranded?"

I know. "Death is temporary. TV is forever."

This is chopper 1138. We're approximately

two clicks away from the insertion zone.

Jared, we're coming up on the drop zone.

- You ready to hit it, Rance? - Locked and loaded.

Locked and loaded.

Those folks won't know what hit them.

( helicopters whirring )

You're up early, Detective.

What's going on?

Could you go back and come out again?

Try to show a little more surprise for the camera.

I thought this was supposed to be reality.

Yeah, TV reality.

Asshole.

- Sam, sticks and stones-- - Oh, shut up.

( alarm buzzing )

All right, boys. Let's move out!

Let's go!

( siren blasting )

Rise and shine, folks!

- What's happening? - What is that noise?

Sam: Just keep repeating, "It's only TV."

Are those helicopters?

It's pandemonium and panic here on Palm Key,

as the island is apparently under armed invasion!

We're down. Head for the extraction point, and wait for us.

Pilot: Copy that. Roger.

Let's go.

What is this bullshit?

Yeah.

How's anybody supposed to get some sleep?

- I need my eight hours. - Don't count on it.

The first challenge of the island--

The first lesson of the jungle--

Be alert, be watchful,

and maybe you'll survive.

Was that the Navy SEALs?

You never know, my young friend...

Until you feel their hot breath

and their cold steel

take you down.

- ( phone rings ) - Excuse me.

It's his boyfriend.

( ringing )

Yeah.

How did we do?

Absolutely fantastic, gentlemen.

You scared them like sheep to the slaughter.

Good. I'll see you in the morning.

Sleep well. Don't let the bedbugs bite.

Great.

Get some rest, guys.

- Good morning, Sam. - Good morning.

Just packing our gear.

- Hey, Sam. - Good morning.

Ready to find that treasure?

I'm all a-twitter.

You think I'm a real worrier, don't you?

To be honest, I don't think about you much.

Here's the deal. Somebody's gonna win a lot of money

and the rest of us are going to go home.

Maybe, maybe not.

Get a look at that shoreline.

It's a lousy day.

I used to cover hurricanes for the "Herald" in Miami.

See how choppy those waves are?

Sam: What's it mean?

Take a guess.

All right, team one, let's go.

I think it's this way.

Susan: Detective? Team leader?

Sorry, Sam.

If we're supposed to follow this map in order,

then where's the competition?

The maps are all different. And all the clues.

They just lead to the same place.

Turner: Yep, this way.

I think we're right on the money.

Turner. He must have overheard me last night.

So let's follow Turner.

Won't do us any good. Like Steve said, all the maps are different.

What's that first stanza of the pirate's poem?

"A pint of grog is nearly game,

by pool that's cool on nearby plain."

That's a stupid poem.

- I know it is. - What's "grog"?

It's rum. And game means "old or spoiled."

"Old and spoiled." That would be like our team leader.

I prefer "vintage."

Tina: This poem doesn't make any sense.

Sometimes you can't go with the literal meaning of the words.

Tina: whatever.

Sometimes you can.

You are the bomb.

Bomb? Aren't you a little old to be talking like that?

Ooh-- A little grouchy today?

Curmudgeonly. It's more dignified.

Okay, guys.

New heading.

North.

If those guys get picked off,

maybe you and I can form a loyalty alliance.

You know, when we get the treasure?

Like sisters against the world? A "Thelma & Louise" thing?

Yeah, I loved that movie.

Do you remember that cop that followed them around?

- Uh-huh. - I'm following him right to the cash,

and you can try and compete--

If you think you can handle this "Susan bitch."

Well, la-de-da.

So...

How do we start?

- Start what? - You know, a little trust.

We get in bed together and get the treasure first.

That's great. But who's to say you won't betray me?

It's $10 million. I totally intend to.

Now I'm starting to like you.

I feel the same way.

Hey.

"In bed together"?

I think this is the place to look.

Look right there.

Turner: Let's spread out and start looking.

Where?

It could be anywhere.

Turner: This looks like a likely spot over here.

What's your story, mate?

What are you talking about?

The GI Joe-Rambo deal?

I just wanna be ready for anything, okay?

You remind me of a captain I had in Vietnam.

I think he saw "Patton" once too often.

Maybe you guys have the same tailor, huh?

Okay, Mr. Edwards-- Not that it's any of your business--

Five years ago I was working for Great Eastern Armor.

Every night, we made a little milk run to the local bank.

One night we got hit--

Hard.

Three of my friends were taken down.

I spent a year in recovery.

I swore no one would ever take me down again.

Nobody.

Take a break in place. I'm just talking shit.

Yeah, quiet's nice, too.

Check this out.

I found something.

I'll take that, Mr. Edwards.

Go to hell.

- I'm the team leader. - I didn't vote for you.

Find your own damn clues.

Those aren't the rules. We're supposed to share in the discovery.

- A team effort, remember? - Exactly. So let's have it.

You are looking like assholes on national television.

- Exactly. - Okay, you win.

Pick it up, old man.

- "Old man"? - You heard me.

Get your hands off him!

I thought you said you were a teacher.

- I am. - What kind of school?

Martial arts.

That's right, boys. A new pecking order.

Bitch.

Goddamn it. You and I got to talk.

Damn it-- A woman.

Yeah, could you hold for a minute?

This better be important. I got the network affiliates

on a conference link-up.

You wanted to know when it's a storm?

Well, it's a storm.

Sam, wait a second. I just got an idea.

Listen to this line-- "Davy Jones' locker

is as shallow as low tide."

What's that sound like to you?

- It's a tidal pool. - Exactly.

That's where the treasure is buried. I'd stake your life on it.

That's comforting.

We're still gonna need the exact coordinates.

There must a hundred tidal pools on this island.

But only one on this map.

They're not gonna let us find the money that quickly.

It's worth a shot. Anything better to do?

I'll be brave.

She's got a point.

That was a little obvious, wasn't it?

I had a good teacher.

Stuart: What? Talk to me!

It's getting bad.

Hurricane warnings. Gale force.

I suppose you better contact the island.

I did, nobody's listening. You need to get a chopper in.

Get those people out of there!

I can't blow a 13-week network commitment

for a little rain and wind. Come on!

These people are being paid

to be on that island and survive,

so damn it, let 'em survive.

You are such a bastard.

Really?

And what part of "currently seeking new employment"

don't you understand?

What is happening down there?

What kept you guys?

Shut up and dig.

Not me. I am strictly white collar.

Just do it, Rance.

- Did you bring my stuff? - Yeah.

A check for one million, fresh passport...

You're gonna be fine, Jack.

If this passport isn't fine, I'll be dead.

How much you owe, Jack?

You mean, just to the IRS, or to Vegas and Miami?

Oh, I don't know.

Just pick a number out of the air.

Enough to get me killed.

Enough to get you killed.

That's what I can't figure out, Jack.

If you're such a big a celebrity,

how's a fake passport going to help you

once you get off the island?

This show hasn't been picked up by the foreign TV buyers yet.

After this week,

I'm sure it won't be.

All right, I give up. What kind of car are you going to buy?

- Ooh, a Cadillac. No! - This way.

No, no. A beemer.

Tina: This is gonna be fun!

Tina: Oh, yes!

Let's go. Whoo!

What was that?

Get ready, guys.

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

There wasn't supposed to be any killing.

I didn't get into it for that.

Stop your whining.

You got in for the money, the same as the rest of us.

Rance: Got it!

( laughs )

- Whoo-hoo-hoo! - We hit a Jackpot.

Yee-hah!

( men laughing )

- Fantastic. - I thought it was gonna be a check.

( muffled male voices )

Hey, are they supposed to be hunting for treasure?

I thought they were supposed to be hunting us.

Those aren't paintball guns.

The easiest money you ever made.

We got company.

- Jack: Oh, my god. - Take them out.

- What do you mean--? - Take 'em out!

( gunfire )

Move, move, move!

No! Stop it, goddamn it! Stop them!

I hear guns.

I'm sure it's just the paintball guns.

I carry a gun for a living.

Real weapons don't sound like that.

- Are you sure? - Yeah, I'm sure.

Where did the cameraman go?

He said something about getting some batteries.

Is the weather getting really bad, or is it me?

It ain't you, sister.

Susan: Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

There they go!

Man: Split! Right, right!

Two!

Stay with me.

Move it, move it! Let's go!

Oww!

Got one! Move it, move! Come on!

Go, go, go, go!

Come on, move it!

Let's go! She's went down here.

Man: spread out! Find her!

Keep looking! Let's go!

Check there! Damn it.

- Oh-hh! - Shh.

- Man: Wait! Whoa! - Don't make a sound.

- I can't breathe. - Shh! Shh-shh.

- Nothing, nobody. - I ain't got time for this shit. Let's go.

Okay.

This is gonna hurt, but it's a free ride.

- ( groans ) - Come on.

( thunderclap )

So, how did we do, Jack?

Think we're ready for prime time?

( retching )

I'm gonna go check on the guys.

Go ahead.

- ( Jack retches ) - ( laughs )

Hey!

Come on!

I think we should go back!

- I think we should go back! - Don't stop!

He's a cop. He knows what he's doing!

Get to camp!

( wind gusting )

Which way?

I don't know, I think it's this way.

Ow.

( gasps )

( yelps )

Come on!

( screams )

Just go! Go on!

No! I'm not leaving without you!

I can't!

Come on! I'm bigger and I'm older.

Let's go! Come on!

This is getting really bad.

Treasure or no treasure, I'm going back to those huts

- until this blows over. - I'm with you, lady.

Hey, wait a minute. I think I'm onto something!

Edwards: Get over here.

This wasn't supposed to be like this!

You're telling me!

I thought it was supposed to be sunshine and bikinis.

That's not what I mean!

( thunderclap )

Kim: What's going on?

She's hurt.

- One of the paintballs get her? - No, she's been shot!

- Shot?! - They're using live ammo! Real bullets!

We've got to get back to camp! Come on!

Let's get out of here!

I wounded one of the contestants!

I didn't know how much time you wanted us to waste,

so we came back here!

There's another team out there!

What do you want me to do, kill everybody?

Fuck them! Let's take the money and get out of here!

They can implicate us!

You kind of dropped that ball, didn't you, Jack?

The way I see it, it's your worry, not ours.

We're all anonymous.

You? You're on the cover of those TV mags.

At least in this country.

And with all those bodies all over the island,

I don't think you'll ever be able to use that passport.

Oh, my God... Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God!

- Now what happens? - Bad news, Jack!

Your ratings are in,

and we're your mid-season replacement.

No! No, no, no!

Give me the radio!

I'm going to higher ground to call a chopper in for extraction.

Let's go!

Okay, move out.

Make sure this goes out right away.

It's got a name-- Hurricane James.

Named after the great sea explorer,

captain James Cook. He died on an island in the Pacific.

Yeah, right. So when does it blow over?

It doesn't.

The hurricane is nature's great slate cleaner.

It goes where it wants, destroys everything in its path,

and moves on.

So, what happens next?

The fun begins.

We have to go back! We have to go find them!

No, we stay here.

Look! They're coming!

Hey!

Kim: I'll take Susan and look for bandages.

- Good! - Listen,

we need a hired gun on this deal.

It's down to you or me!

Or me! I'm a licensed security guard

it the state of Texas, you know.

Great, a Texas security guard. God help us.

Mr. Chaney, I work in a dangerous business!

I carry a gun for a living, okay?

Yeah, yeah, I know.

In the state of Texas they require

a thousand hours of training to carry a hair dryer,

and only 40 to carry a gun.

Let's just let Phil do it! He's ex-military!

No, I'm too old and tired to lead! You do it!

Yeah!

- Is that okay with you? - Yeah, I'm okay with that.

All right, look--

We know they're coming after us,

So here's what we do:

Steve, you and Turner go and check the hut

for food or weapons, or anything you can dig up!

- Okay! - I'll take the first watch.

- I'll take the first watch. - No, I'll do it!

- No, I got it. - Be careful!

Bad news--

The chopper pilot refuses to fly.

What do you mean, "refuses"?

We paid him enough money. I'll cut his--

- Why? - He says a storm system's tearing up the whole Pacific.

He doesn't want to risk an ocean flyover.

How are we supposed to get to the fucking pickup ship?

There's a chopper on the other side of the island.

- We can take that. - All right. Let's move!

If that pilot won't fly, I'll put a gun to his fucking head!

You don't think they're gonna try the same damn thing?

Our number one priority as of this moment,

is to eliminate these people.

Yes, sir!

No witnesses, no crime.

Let's go.

Dumb shit!

What-- What is that line?

Tsunami.

Tidal wave.

Stirred up by the hurricane.

It should make landfall on those folks in six hours.

All right. That's it. I'll call in the choppers

and get those people out of there.

It's too late. Choppers are grounded.

You're going to go down in TV history

as the first producer to kill off his entire first season cast.

Should make a hell of a bargaining tool

next time you negotiate actors' contracts.

They're not going to die! I won't let them.

You won't?

That island may not survive.

That's not even the best part.

See that tail section of the wave?

That may hit us.

If it does-- We're driftwood.

Hello?

- Hello? - Recording: Hello.

This is your carnival princess coming to you...

This is Palm Key Island. Somebody help!

Help. Hello? We're under attack!

- Help! - ( buzzes )

( thunderclap )

How's she doing?

Kim's a good nurse.

I got a merit badge in this in Girl Scouts.

I think I stopped the bleeding,

but she's gonna need antibiotics.

- Anything in the huts? - Nothing but bandages.

We found some satellite gear.

We might be able to use it to call for help.

Yeah, maybe Steve can help you figure it out.

If there's time.

Well, we better get going.

Susan, you ready for some aerobics?

Sure.

You may feel like hell, but you look great.

Hey.

Thanks for pulling me out back there.

Don't mention it.

I found all the canned goods, cheese and crackers

and stuff I could. Water, too,

but no weapons. Only my knife.

I got a couple of radios.

Steve, you think you can get that satellite uplink working?

I don't know, maybe.

You were right. They're coming from the north.

- They're five minutes away. - Satellite uplink?

No time! Here's what we're gonna do.

We're gonna head south,

then we're gonna double back.

Get the other women, and let's move out!

There they are!

Do 'em!

( distant whistling )

Incoming! Go, go, go!

( yells )

Steve, help!

Come on!

( rocket whistling )

Let's go! Come on!

Steve: Come on!

Come on!

Steve: Wait, wait!

I think the explosions have stopped.

Who do we have to fuck to get off this island?

My money's on the helicopter pilot.

These guys aren't finished with us yet, goddamn it!

- Let's get to the chopper! - Let's go!

Okay, gentlemen...

No more witnesses.

Let's go get us a chopper.

( constant thunder )

Sailor: This is the U.S.S. Intrepid.

We are tracking the storm

on all primary and secondary grids.

The latest coordinates indicate

a north by northwest track at approximately five knots.

We have two reports of foundering vessels.

The first, 70 clicks southeast of Palm Straits,

bearing 1-5-0.

The second, 55 clicks north of our current position,

bearing 1-7-9.

We will advise as to weather conditions

as you approach the vessel, chopper commander.

Please state current position and estimated ETA

Woman: This is chopper command.

We are approximately 20 clicks from distress coordinates.

ETA, 1400 hours, over.

- Prepare the secondary rescue team. - Aye, sir.

Secondary rescue team, prepare to launch.

Repeat, secondary rescue team, prepare to launch.

Load all necessary personnel aboard chopper bravo tango zero.

Soldier: Go, go, go!

Move it, move it!

Chopper Command: Chopper bravo tango zero--

I want you out of there ASAP,

before the winds pick up any further.

Roger that.

Get us something, anything.

Okay, call me back.

Can the Coast Guard help?

They've only got three, four hours flying weather left

and they have too many other grids to cover.

Downed planes. Sinking boats.

Shouldn't they have warned us?

They couldn't. Nobody could.

This storm appeared out of nowhere.

I hope to god it leaves the same way.

- I haven't got time to hope. - ( phone rings )

Station? Yes.

Whoa.

Island team to pick-up. What's your position? Over.

I'm 200 nautical miles southwest of the island.

These conditions are impossible. I'm taking an alternate course.

If the weather gets much worse than this,

we won't be able to fly.

You cannot alter our pickup time!

I don't have any choice.

If I continue to plow through this, I'm gonna sink!

- How much time? - I don't know!

Well, give me a guess!

Bryant!

Oh, my God...

( people screaming )

( static )

Shit!

Fuck 'em.

( rapid thunder )

Kim: Jesus, it looks like where I grew up on the farm.

- Hey, Garrett. - There's a cot over there.

That lamp is new.

Sam: Yeah, it is. And these matches.

- Okay, okay. - ( Susan groans )

This is all just a little too convenient.

Maybe it was something we were meant to stumble across

for a scene in the show.

Or maybe a hideout for the Navy SEALs.

Navy SEALs don't kill innocent people. That's bullshit.

Whatever. If this is their cabin,

won't they come back soon?

I hope we won't be here that long.

- You're gonna be fine. - Thanks.

- Let's talk outside. - Come on.

How is she?

I'm not really sure.

Her body temperature is dropping

and she's lost a lot of blood

with all the exertion and the trauma.

Sam: Think she'll go into shock?

It's a possibility.

I don't know what I can do about it.

- Hey. - Hey.

She's not giving you very good odds, is she?

You heard that?

I'm sorry.

It doesn't matter.

I wanted an adventure and I got one.

Yeah. How come?

I guess I realized that stocks and bonds were all I knew.

I mean, my entire world

was this office in Oklahoma City,

and the gym.

I wanted to live.

- I wanted to have some fun. - So, that's it?

Just running around naked, communing with nature?

I've always been an optimist.

I also thought I might win the big prize.

And if you did, what then?

Back to your office in Oklahoma City?

No, I was--

I was going to open a homeless shelter

for runaway kids.

Have I been flirting with Mother Teresa?

I had a kid sister

who went out to Hollywood with big dreams,

and she lost all of them.

And then we lost her.

It happens to kids like her every day.

Yep, I see it a lot.

I can't imagine being a cop.

I like it.

You get to carve out your little piece of the world.

Try to make a difference.

I guess I've been flirting with a saint, too.

By no means.

No, my motivations are purely selfish.

If I have a good day, I sleep better.

So, Sam...

What would you have spent the money on--

If you won?

Hot dogs and beer.

You think I'm kidding?

Rance: How are we supposed to get out of here

- with no rendezvous ship? - Don't worry about it.

We'll take the chopper and fly to Hawaii.

There's a guy in Maui that will give us fresh passports.

Suppose he takes only cash?

That won't be a problem.

Think the storm has passed?

I don't know.

I'm just glad the rain has let up.

Steve, you've covered hurricanes, what do you think?

No... This is just the calm

before it all hits the fan.

Little pockets of easy weather

are all over these storm systems.

We better enjoy it while we can.

How far do you think we are from the beach?

It's not that big of an island. Maybe a couple of hours.

We're ready to go.

Okay, let's move out.

Watch your step.

( screams )

Turner: What happened?

What the hell was that?!

Okay, check it out! You guys go that way!

Split up!

Shit!

What are you looking at? Okay, let's move.

Oh, my God! They fell!

Kim: I can't believe I did this!

How can I be so fucking clumsy?

Hey. Are you okay?

- I think so. - Son of a fucking bitch!

- How bad is it? - It's a sprain.

We'll just walk a little slower.

We can't. They'll find us on this road.

They blew up the camp. They think we're dead.

Not for long. We're walking the same path.

It's a matter of time before we knock heads with them.

Wait a minute. If a couple of us

could double-time back to that chopper,

we could fly our asses out of here.

If that chopper is still there.

If Sam and Phil could take the shortcut along that path,

they'd hit the beach in half an hour.

- It's a tough climb. - We can make it.

- You can't leave us here! - Turner: She's right!

The rest of us will have no chance on this road.

There's no protection. There's no place to hide! We won't have a chance.

- You will, if we lower the odds a little. - What are you thinking?

If we double back and take them by surprise, they won't expect it.

- You okay with that? - Good to go.

Sam--

If you wait any longer you're not gonna be able to fly.

- You've got to go now. - We're gonna need one of your radios.

Steve, you and Turner keep an eye on the jungle in case they come after you.

- Let's go. - Stay on channel 2.

- Right. - We can't fight those guys!

- They're professionals. - So are you, and so am I!

You're the big bad-ass security guard!

You've been wanting to lead this group, now's your chance.

What do we do if they come back?

Use your head... And keep moving.

- Okay, let's go up here. - Let's go.

We never should have split up!

It's our only chance.

( moaning )

( groans )

( cracks )

Aaah!

You have the right to remain silent!

Anything you say will be used against you!

( chuckles )

- ( rifle cocks ) - Hey, brother...

- Time to die. - ( whirring )

Ooh!

( sighs )

I'm getting too old-time for this shit!

So am I! Let's go find that chopper.

Hold it! What's that?

Shit.

It's Logan!

The contestants are still alive.

That's bullshit.

It can't be them. We torched the bastards.

Who else?

Did you see any burning bodies in the village?

I didn't think so.

It looks like we've got a fight on our hands.

From who? These TV pricks?

One man dead, one man missing--

Maybe we underestimated these "pricks."

These "pricks" now have weapons.

So do we.

Rance: Fuck 'em. Let's get off this island.

Let's go.

Leave the transmitter on.

What? Why?

I'm sending reports to the local TV station

trying to warn residents on the island.

My last few live reports.

I've routed the rooftop camera, satellite maps,

barometer-- Anything I can send.

Not tonight. Come on, come on.

I've seen enough. Let's go.

No one's going anywhere now, Stu.

No boats, no helicopters are gonna fly in this.

For good or bad, we're here for the duration.

Oh, and Stu...

Yellow's not your color.

You know what? You're fired, too.

You wanted reality TV? You got it.

Bill: How would you like to do some real work for a change?

Put something useful on the airwaves.

Do what we got in this business to do,

before it became all about the money.

Maybe save some lives.

All right...

All right, show me what to do.

We have to get out in the open. This road's about to flood!

- No, no! - We'll get electrocuted!

We have to keep moving! It's the fastest way!

I'm stiff! Why am I stiff?

Runner's high.

There it is, we made it.

Not yet.

Hey! Great to see somebody. Anybody.

- Where you people been? - Did they send help?

I haven't heard from anybody

since I dropped you people on the beach.

I'm having a hurricane party.

Have a drink.

Get this thing started!

No, I'm not flying up in this shit. That's how you get killed.

( cocks gun ) So's this.

( screams )

Mindi!

Help!

Help me!

( screaming )

We have to help them!

No! No, there's nothing we can do.

We have to keep moving!

Come on!

Hold up!

Hold up!

Sam?

Sam, come in! It's me, Steve!

Yeah, Steve, I hear you.

Give me your position. Where are you?

About a mile south from where you left us.

We lost two. Mindi and Turner.

- Mercs do it? - No, lightning.

Okay, I got you. We're right above you now. Stand by.

- Take us down. - Where?

Steve, is there any kind of a clearing nearby you?

Yes!

Right in front of us!

It's a little plateau. It looks like it might be drier.

Okay, I see it!

( gun cocks )

Steve, you copy?

Steve, come in!

Looks like our ride's here, guys.

What the hell's going on down there?

I don't watch your show, Sammy, so I haven't seen your bio.

You're good. Real good.

How's this grab you?

( screaming )

Put it down in that clearing.

If I take it down I might not be able

to get it back up again.

I'm just bouncing around in the wind!

I said, take us down, now!

I can't wait to meet you, Sammy.

I hope you brought the guns,

or I start picking your friends off, one by one.

You ever done any sniper work?

- A little bit. - One more thing...

I'm gonna need your knife!

All right. Jeffries.

Watch them. Rance!

Follow me.

Put the money in the bags! Let's go.

What are you thinking, little girl?

I'm not staying on this island.

Put your hands behind your head.

Sammy!

Where's the old man-- The vet?

I heard he was with you.

He's dead!

Dead?

How?

Heart attack. On the trail.

I'll check it out.

Sammy, how many of my men did you kill?

How many you got left?

Is this the way it's gonna go down, Sammy?

Huh?

Jeffries: Thank you, ladies...

But it's time to call it a night.

( gunshot )

- Are you okay, baby? - Yeah! Are you okay?

Wait!

Here's your money. I just need a ride!

Please?

Yeah...

I could use a hostage.

There goes a real piece of work.

Get in there!

Take us up, now!

All right! No guarantees.

Just do it! Do it!

I've got the map.

- Let's get the hell out of here! - Okay.

- You okay? - Yeah. Yeah. Go.

It's gonna be a bad one!

But we'll be safe up in this tree.

With the surf coming in here we could be hit by a tidal wave

and wipe out these fucking trees!

Guys, look at this. There's a cave on the side of this cliff.

It's high enough above the beach to keep us safe.

The cave is on the south side of the island!

It could give us just enough shelter,

but we've got to move fast!

No, we can't! Susan's in bad shape!

- Susan isn't dead yet. - All right, let's go!

And we're up in three, two, one-- Now.

Eastern edge of the storm is approximately

six miles west of Waimea Point, at last reading.

Maximum sustained winds, 140 miles per hour.

We expect landfall on the outer island

in less than 20 minutes.

- We're clear. - All right.

Let's go again in five minutes.

You think they'll make it on the island?

I don't know if the island will make it.

God help them.

God help us all.

We're gonna crash!

Get us up above this thing! There's a million in it for you.

I don't know where "up" is! It's all black outside.

- Sweet Jesus. - I don't think you're on his A-list.

Bastard! You're gonna kill us!

Go!

Will we be safe in here?

Safest place on the island, I guess.

That's not saying much.

Hey, how's she doing?

I think she's in shock.

- ( alarm sounds ) - Here it comes.

Holy shit!

Hang on! I'm trying to get above it!

( screams )

Kim: Oh, my God, guys. It's the money.

You know, that rescue team

will probably be here any minute.

Let's get to work.

- Command: Any sign of them? - Not yet.

Keep looking.

Pilot: Wait a minute-- We have visual confirmation.

The island is still intact.

Send in the airlift rescue choppers on the double.

I guess you aren't coming back, huh?

What do you care?

You've got a big new TV career.

It didn't work out.

They said I'm not camera friendly.

Tough town.

Tell me about it.

I hear you're signed for "Treasure Hunt 2."

I guess that makes you the big TV star now.

Doesn't he look like one?

You must be "Mother Teresa."

You can call me Susan.

- Susan? - Yeah.

- Sam's a good cop. - Yes, ma'am, he is.

If he ever wants to come back on the force,

I'd love to have him.

I took care of his little political problem.

Page one.

Well, thank you, Captain. I will be back...

Right after the hiatus.

And after you help me build my homeless shelters.

That's right.

- Cheers. - No, ma'am.

You drink one for me. I'm still on duty.

Susan: He seems like a nice guy.

Sam: He's kind of an asshole, but he's okay.

Would you mind getting us another round of drinks?

- I'm not your wife. - Not yet.

Is that a proposal?

Well, call it a proposition.

The first of many.

That'll cost you more.

Now, isn't that nice?