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1
00:00:06,283 --> 00:00:07,450
Eric...
2
00:00:07,769 --> 00:00:11,257
I found this in the garage
and I want an explanation.
3
00:00:11,283 --> 00:00:16,917
Okay, when people write stories and glue the
pages together, it forms what we call a book,
4
00:00:17,384 --> 00:00:22,834
I don't want "the joy of sex"
polluting my house.
5
00:00:24,059 --> 00:00:28,927
"The joy of sex."
What a load of crap.
6
00:00:29,777 --> 00:00:32,227
That book's
for perverts, Red.
7
00:00:32,443 --> 00:00:35,643
You should give it to me
so I can sell it to Fez.
8
00:00:36,347 --> 00:00:38,308
Red, the book is mine.
9
00:00:38,411 --> 00:00:42,159
I put it in the garage
so you would find it.
10
00:00:43,693 --> 00:00:46,093
Uh-oh. I'm late for work.
11
00:00:46,160 --> 00:00:52,010
No, no, no, I am serious. It's high time you
and I put some zip back in the bedroom.
12
00:00:53,960 --> 00:00:55,810
I got a great idea.
13
00:00:55,860 --> 00:00:59,680
We'll put a TV in the bedroom.
There's your zip.
14
00:01:04,071 --> 00:01:06,055
Okay, I want
the full Fez treatment...
15
00:01:06,105 --> 00:01:10,205
a wash, cream rinse and a lot of that
wiggly stuff you do with your fingers.
16
00:01:10,255 --> 00:01:12,049
It's magical.
17
00:01:12,122 --> 00:01:14,538
Abracadabra, baby.
18
00:01:15,072 --> 00:01:20,038
So, Danielle, what's on your schedule today?
I mean, besides looking beautiful.
19
00:01:20,355 --> 00:01:23,916
Well, looking beautiful is from
10 to 12, then I have a date.
20
00:01:23,966 --> 00:01:27,399
Ooh, hot date alert.
Tsss!
21
00:01:30,066 --> 00:01:32,533
It's not that hot. The guy's
kind of a knucklehead.
22
00:01:32,583 --> 00:01:36,116
I mean, he's really cute, but it's like,
when I talk, he's not paying attention to me.
23
00:01:36,166 --> 00:01:37,466
Oh!
24
00:01:39,363 --> 00:01:42,513
I hear this complaint
20 times a day.
25
00:01:43,113 --> 00:01:46,863
You're a treasure. He should
worship you like a big stone head.
26
00:01:47,746 --> 00:01:50,146
You're so great. You know,
you really get women.
27
00:01:50,196 --> 00:01:53,263
Well, if you mean "get" as in
"understand," then, yes, I get them.
28
00:01:53,296 --> 00:01:55,613
But if you mean "get"
as in "get,"
29
00:01:56,313 --> 00:01:57,946
then, no, never.
30
00:01:59,346 --> 00:02:03,530
If I had a woman like you, I would
give her anything her heart desired.
31
00:02:05,446 --> 00:02:08,700
Maybe I should blow off my date
and go out with a guy like you.
32
00:02:08,733 --> 00:02:13,117
And when I say, "a guy like you,"
I mean you, specifically.
33
00:02:16,383 --> 00:02:18,095
Wow.
34
00:02:18,795 --> 00:02:21,895
But just to be clear, I still
have a tip coming, right?
35
00:02:25,294 --> 00:02:28,561
That 70's Show - Saison 7 Episode 07
"Mothers little helper"
36
00:02:28,594 --> 00:02:31,928
Traduction par Guzo et Fabregues
Synchro par Kiff
37
00:02:31,978 --> 00:02:35,044
Merci � Raceman
38
00:02:35,084 --> 00:02:38,167
www.forom.com
39
00:02:38,268 --> 00:02:41,368
Pre�asoval / Retiming
blsho
40
00:03:06,663 --> 00:03:11,213
Steven. Steven, would you please stop
doing that? You're gonna get all Eric-Y.
41
00:03:12,069 --> 00:03:13,303
Give.
42
00:03:14,269 --> 00:03:18,786
Jackie, boys have to play fight because
they secretly want to touch each other.
43
00:03:21,069 --> 00:03:23,549
Yeah, you guys wish
you could play fight.
44
00:03:23,599 --> 00:03:26,999
But girls can't, 'cause it
always turns into a real fight.
45
00:03:27,133 --> 00:03:30,649
Are you seriously telling me that if Jackie
and i wanted to play fight, we couldn't?
46
00:03:30,699 --> 00:03:33,016
Um, let me listen for the
echo of what I just said.
47
00:03:33,066 --> 00:03:36,166
Girls can't play fight.
Yep! That's what I think.
48
00:03:37,916 --> 00:03:40,916
I agree. Girls
are bitches.
49
00:03:41,821 --> 00:03:43,237
Really?
50
00:03:44,387 --> 00:03:46,537
- Come on, Jackie. Put your dukes up.
- Okay.
51
00:03:46,587 --> 00:03:49,287
Watch and learn, boys.
52
00:03:52,281 --> 00:03:54,764
See, it's all fun and games.
53
00:03:54,814 --> 00:03:57,464
Ow, you scratched me!
54
00:03:58,098 --> 00:03:59,765
Get off of me, bigfoot!
55
00:03:59,815 --> 00:04:03,548
Let go of my hair or I'll
pound your tiny ass!
56
00:04:08,131 --> 00:04:10,653
- Spoilsport.
- Hey,
57
00:04:11,003 --> 00:04:13,169
yours is gonna kill mine.
58
00:04:17,319 --> 00:04:19,840
Ladies, that was pathetic.
59
00:04:19,886 --> 00:04:22,302
What?
That wasn't even real.
60
00:04:22,352 --> 00:04:23,452
- We're fine.
- Yeah.
61
00:04:23,502 --> 00:04:26,102
I don't know what you're
talking about. I had fun.
62
00:04:26,219 --> 00:04:28,669
Oh, you're so immature!
63
00:04:33,319 --> 00:04:36,152
You guys aren't going
to believe this.
64
00:04:36,719 --> 00:04:37,769
Wait.
65
00:04:37,919 --> 00:04:40,719
Were two hot girls
just fighting in here?
66
00:04:41,636 --> 00:04:42,802
No.
67
00:04:43,252 --> 00:04:44,928
Someone is lying.
68
00:04:45,995 --> 00:04:47,195
Anyway,
69
00:04:47,278 --> 00:04:50,345
I was just shampooing this foxy girl
Danielle, and the next thing I know,
70
00:04:50,378 --> 00:04:53,228
we're making out
in the shampoo closet.
71
00:04:53,495 --> 00:04:57,007
Wait a second, you're trying to tell me that you
were shampooing a girl and she got so horny,
72
00:04:57,048 --> 00:04:59,836
she had to make out with you
in the shampoo closet?
73
00:05:00,029 --> 00:05:02,995
That doesn't sound real, man.
That sounds like a mad lib.
74
00:05:06,349 --> 00:05:09,849
Yeah, are you sure you
weren't just kissing a mop?
75
00:05:12,616 --> 00:05:14,760
'Cause, man, I've
seen you do that.
76
00:05:15,660 --> 00:05:17,110
No, no.
77
00:05:17,144 --> 00:05:20,616
Danielle kept going on and on about this
adorable knucklehead she was dating,
78
00:05:20,633 --> 00:05:23,171
and I just sympathized
with her problems.
79
00:05:23,527 --> 00:05:25,127
Well, that makes sense.
80
00:05:25,157 --> 00:05:28,107
I mean, all a woman really
wants is a man who listens.
81
00:05:28,157 --> 00:05:29,457
I listen.
82
00:05:29,707 --> 00:05:32,273
And doesn't pat
himself on the back.
83
00:05:33,540 --> 00:05:35,807
I never pat myself
on the back.
84
00:05:36,096 --> 00:05:38,379
So, yeah, I got that
going for me.
85
00:05:39,296 --> 00:05:43,346
You guys, something happened today
that has never happened to me before.
86
00:05:43,404 --> 00:05:45,846
Oh, you did long division?
87
00:05:47,004 --> 00:05:48,871
No, I got stood up.
88
00:05:48,921 --> 00:05:52,504
I was supposed to meet this girl Danielle
after her haircut, and she never showed.
89
00:05:52,578 --> 00:05:53,972
Danielle!
90
00:05:54,485 --> 00:05:56,135
Danielle?
91
00:05:56,402 --> 00:05:59,302
Okay, wait a second, first
a girl fight and now this?
92
00:05:59,335 --> 00:06:01,902
I vote "Best day ever."
93
00:06:04,969 --> 00:06:08,452
Kelso is the adorable knucklehead.
94
00:06:09,036 --> 00:06:12,202
Hey, thanks, Fez, but I'm
trying to tella story here.
95
00:06:13,019 --> 00:06:15,737
Okay, so I've been trying to figure
out why she didn't show,
96
00:06:15,785 --> 00:06:18,319
and I've come to the only
logical conclusion...
97
00:06:18,369 --> 00:06:20,069
she's dead.
98
00:06:22,702 --> 00:06:25,587
Kelso, maybe Danielle met a guy
that she likes better than you.
99
00:06:25,637 --> 00:06:29,404
Don't be crazy, Fez. Danielle is dead,
and we can never bring her back.
100
00:06:33,920 --> 00:06:37,370
Kitty, we don't need
"The joy of sex."
101
00:06:37,404 --> 00:06:42,720
Well, why not? It's not dirty. This book...
it doesn't even have photographs, just
102
00:06:42,937 --> 00:06:44,970
sketches.
103
00:06:45,554 --> 00:06:49,287
But they're so detailed.
They draw in every single part.
104
00:06:49,320 --> 00:06:51,620
And it's not to scale.
105
00:06:52,587 --> 00:06:55,387
Oh, here's a fun idea.
106
00:06:55,421 --> 00:06:56,804
Okay.
107
00:06:57,804 --> 00:07:03,473
Instead of throwing away our old dish
towels, we can use them as blindfolds
108
00:07:03,523 --> 00:07:08,440
and play a sexy bedroom
version of marco polo.
109
00:07:09,448 --> 00:07:13,448
Oh, come on. Don't you want to be
one of those fun, older couples?
110
00:07:13,498 --> 00:07:18,481
Kitty, I want us to grow old
and withdraw into ourselves.
111
00:07:20,280 --> 00:07:22,063
Hey, what's for lunch?
112
00:07:22,630 --> 00:07:26,596
Well, I was thinking of making something, but that
would mean I would have to look at a cookbook,
113
00:07:26,646 --> 00:07:30,446
and I don't like to learn
new things from books.
114
00:07:32,313 --> 00:07:34,729
Yeah, so is
lunch off or, um...
115
00:07:35,313 --> 00:07:38,313
I mean, what's the lay
of the lunch land here?
116
00:07:38,363 --> 00:07:43,563
I don't see why I have to read
a book on bodily functions.
117
00:07:43,980 --> 00:07:47,980
I've never read a book on eating,
yet I'm extremely well fed.
118
00:07:48,163 --> 00:07:50,563
But I'm not.
Could I, like...
119
00:07:51,896 --> 00:07:54,596
seriously, like a
sandwich or...
120
00:07:54,979 --> 00:07:56,629
Well, you know what?
121
00:07:56,896 --> 00:08:01,063
Nobody is eating unless you
give this book a try. Until then,
122
00:08:01,096 --> 00:08:03,213
I quit cooking.
123
00:08:05,815 --> 00:08:08,532
Wow, I can't believe I'm
asking you this, but
124
00:08:08,865 --> 00:08:11,499
please have kinky sex
with my mother.
125
00:08:18,682 --> 00:08:23,049
No, Danielle, I love your outfit. But
I just think you can always go tighter.
126
00:08:23,866 --> 00:08:26,775
Oh, my god!
Danielle, you're alive!
127
00:08:26,825 --> 00:08:28,708
Yeah, why
wouldn't I be?
128
00:08:29,192 --> 00:08:30,208
Well,
129
00:08:30,258 --> 00:08:34,108
then if you're not dead, then...
then why did you blow off our date?
130
00:08:34,158 --> 00:08:36,891
Look at him try
and put it together.
131
00:08:37,941 --> 00:08:40,274
He's got it now.
132
00:08:40,758 --> 00:08:42,608
No, wait, he doesn't.
133
00:08:43,141 --> 00:08:46,208
Yeah, now... wow.
Not yet. Wow.
134
00:08:46,408 --> 00:08:49,528
This is, like, the
slowest burn ever.
135
00:08:49,620 --> 00:08:53,894
This is like how burns were in the
1800s before we had electricity.
136
00:08:53,935 --> 00:08:57,864
Danielle stood you up so she could make out
with the adorable new man in her life.
137
00:08:57,869 --> 00:08:59,718
Ah... me.
138
00:08:59,768 --> 00:09:02,706
That's right.
Ah.. him.
139
00:09:18,080 --> 00:09:20,111
Don't bump me.
140
00:09:20,243 --> 00:09:22,189
Don't get in
my way.
141
00:09:22,437 --> 00:09:28,727
Well, maybe I wouldn't be in your way if you could sit
still like a normal person instead of a vibrating spazoid.
142
00:09:29,404 --> 00:09:30,576
Really?
143
00:09:30,609 --> 00:09:34,803
Well, guess what.
You fight like a poor girl.
144
00:09:35,678 --> 00:09:37,544
Get off me!
145
00:09:37,570 --> 00:09:39,390
Get off me!
146
00:09:39,440 --> 00:09:41,850
This ain't over, squatty!
147
00:09:42,210 --> 00:09:44,890
Get off. I'm going.
148
00:09:47,137 --> 00:09:51,082
Hey, if they're gonna keep this up,
we should invest in a video camera.
149
00:09:52,508 --> 00:09:57,411
All right, Fez, stand up so I can kick your ass.
How dare you steal a girl out from under me!
150
00:09:57,444 --> 00:10:00,466
First of all, I can do
whatever I want.
151
00:10:00,664 --> 00:10:05,062
Second of all, when I stole her,
she was not under you, she was under moi.
152
00:10:05,739 --> 00:10:06,531
That's it.
153
00:10:06,564 --> 00:10:09,206
Whoa! Whoa!
Guys, listen.
154
00:10:09,256 --> 00:10:13,840
I just realized I am not strong enough
to hold you two apart. Hyde, come on.
155
00:10:17,935 --> 00:10:19,057
Kelso,
156
00:10:19,107 --> 00:10:22,591
Maybe you shouldn't be asking what he did.
You should be asking what you did to let it happen.
157
00:10:22,624 --> 00:10:24,540
Or what you didn't do.
158
00:10:24,606 --> 00:10:26,719
You know, maybe you
just lost your mojo.
159
00:10:26,769 --> 00:10:31,094
Look, a guy can't
just lose his mojo, okay?
160
00:10:32,316 --> 00:10:33,702
Can he?
161
00:10:34,560 --> 00:10:37,384
Well, when was the last time
you made out with two girls at once?
162
00:10:37,433 --> 00:10:38,539
That was...
163
00:10:40,025 --> 00:10:41,395
Oh, no.
164
00:10:42,833 --> 00:10:44,484
I can't remember.
165
00:10:44,533 --> 00:10:47,274
Kissed four different girls
in the same day?
166
00:10:47,307 --> 00:10:49,321
I don't know!
167
00:10:49,800 --> 00:10:52,442
You guys, I might've
lost my mojo.
168
00:10:53,086 --> 00:10:56,289
And I got it.
I got your mojo.
169
00:10:57,296 --> 00:11:00,818
Which reminds me,
I also have your yo-yo, so...
170
00:11:01,934 --> 00:11:03,642
I want 'em both back.
171
00:11:03,675 --> 00:11:07,572
You know, how can I lose a girl to you?
You don't even speak English.
172
00:11:08,117 --> 00:11:09,850
Well, Kelso, look at
the bright side.
173
00:11:09,883 --> 00:11:13,004
Danielle is a wonderful girl
who likes me better than you.
174
00:11:13,565 --> 00:11:16,298
Why is that
the bright side?
175
00:11:16,711 --> 00:11:19,237
Because...
Burn !!!
176
00:11:31,070 --> 00:11:32,738
These are stale.
177
00:11:33,976 --> 00:11:36,684
Well, eat slow.
We gotta make 'em last.
178
00:11:37,526 --> 00:11:38,748
Hey ya, Red.
179
00:11:39,276 --> 00:11:43,779
Eric told me you and Kitty are having a little
trouble in the old hee-hoo department.
180
00:11:44,538 --> 00:11:46,321
You told Bob?
181
00:11:46,371 --> 00:11:49,260
Are you
out of your puny mind?
182
00:11:49,689 --> 00:11:52,034
Look, you have to work
this stuff out with mom.
183
00:11:52,069 --> 00:11:54,612
She hasn't fed us in
three days. Dad,
184
00:11:54,645 --> 00:11:57,237
I can't afford
not to eat.
185
00:11:57,584 --> 00:12:00,688
Yesterday I ate a
raisin off the floor.
186
00:12:01,398 --> 00:12:04,188
I'm not even sure
if it was really a raisin.
187
00:12:04,941 --> 00:12:06,526
Look, Red,
188
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:09,844
you should take Kitty's request
for a love life spice up seriously.
189
00:12:09,894 --> 00:12:12,255
When Midge wanted
to turbo charge our love life,
190
00:12:12,288 --> 00:12:15,507
it was really a symptom
of a much deeper marital problem.
191
00:12:15,557 --> 00:12:17,741
Yeah, that you
were deviants.
192
00:12:17,918 --> 00:12:22,298
Deviants? Well, the couple we were
dating sure didn't seem to think so.
193
00:12:22,662 --> 00:12:25,966
I'm tellin' you, this problem
is not just about sex.
194
00:12:26,012 --> 00:12:27,062
It isn't?
195
00:12:27,279 --> 00:12:30,820
Well, maybe she's just unhappy emotionally.
Wouldn't that be wonderful?
196
00:12:30,886 --> 00:12:34,486
No, Red. It means you have a problem.
And you have to deal with it.
197
00:12:35,320 --> 00:12:36,686
Yeah, okay.
198
00:12:37,553 --> 00:12:42,213
Yeah, I guess it's important that Kitty get
listened to. Eric, go listen to your mother.
199
00:12:42,246 --> 00:12:43,063
Why me?
200
00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:46,013
Because without food,
you'll die first.
201
00:12:50,146 --> 00:12:53,513
So, Danielle, tell me again how much
more you like me than Kelso.
202
00:12:53,563 --> 00:12:56,163
Well, you're sensitive
203
00:12:56,329 --> 00:12:58,663
and thoughtful
and understanding
204
00:12:58,696 --> 00:13:00,449
and very, very sexy.
205
00:13:00,482 --> 00:13:03,032
Lady, don't ever
stop talking.
206
00:13:03,366 --> 00:13:05,482
And you're funny
and sweet.
207
00:13:05,516 --> 00:13:07,799
And did I mention?
Very, very sexy.
208
00:13:07,832 --> 00:13:10,082
Lady, you gotta shut up.
209
00:13:15,442 --> 00:13:18,492
So, mom, in the
interest of returning
210
00:13:18,542 --> 00:13:22,609
regular meal service
to my now shattered life...
211
00:13:23,675 --> 00:13:27,225
I'm here to help. So, uh, just
tell me the problem beneath
212
00:13:27,275 --> 00:13:29,534
the dirty,
gross problem.
213
00:13:29,851 --> 00:13:31,734
Honey, there is none.
214
00:13:31,767 --> 00:13:37,501
I just want your father and me to have
more adventurous sexual intercourse.
215
00:13:38,001 --> 00:13:41,421
Well, this is one of those times
I'm kinda happy my stomach's empty.
216
00:13:41,488 --> 00:13:43,771
Um, look, instead
of calling it,
217
00:13:43,804 --> 00:13:46,588
uh, sexual inter--ah.
Ahem.
218
00:13:48,171 --> 00:13:49,921
Instead of
calling it that,
219
00:13:50,088 --> 00:13:53,248
why don't we call it,
like, a walk in the park?
220
00:13:53,948 --> 00:14:00,531
Fine. I want your father and I to have
more adventurous walks in the park.
221
00:14:00,581 --> 00:14:04,111
I want to walk in the
park in the kitchen.
222
00:14:04,644 --> 00:14:07,594
walk in the park
on a tuesday.
223
00:14:07,694 --> 00:14:10,277
I even want to walk
in the park in the park.
224
00:14:10,311 --> 00:14:11,694
Okay, okay, okay.
225
00:14:12,311 --> 00:14:13,877
Okay, um...
226
00:14:14,794 --> 00:14:18,077
Okay, um, mom, I think you're--
you're playing this all wrong.
227
00:14:18,144 --> 00:14:21,054
Dad wants you to have
a deeper emotional issue.
228
00:14:21,104 --> 00:14:22,621
Invent one.
229
00:14:23,021 --> 00:14:26,154
He'll give you anything you
want to avoid talking about
230
00:14:26,271 --> 00:14:28,037
walks in the park.
231
00:14:28,238 --> 00:14:32,538
So think big. You know, I might be able to
get you diamonds here. Maybe even a new car.
232
00:14:32,588 --> 00:14:36,410
This is like emotional "price is right,"
baby. You're in the showcase.
233
00:14:36,843 --> 00:14:38,060
Oh!
234
00:14:38,243 --> 00:14:42,527
I also want to walk in the
park during "the price is right."
235
00:14:53,452 --> 00:14:55,268
Well, what's the news?
236
00:14:56,985 --> 00:14:58,958
You better start studying.
237
00:15:09,309 --> 00:15:10,426
All right.
238
00:15:11,193 --> 00:15:14,309
So I spent the whole day thinking
about what happened with Danielle.
239
00:15:14,343 --> 00:15:17,543
And I realized that
I shouldn't be mad at you.
240
00:15:17,843 --> 00:15:20,169
I should be asking
you for help.
241
00:15:20,736 --> 00:15:23,853
Holy crap, man. Now you're
asking Fez for girl advice?
242
00:15:23,903 --> 00:15:27,653
Next thing you know Donna's gonna be
asking Forman how to throw a ball.
243
00:15:28,136 --> 00:15:30,119
Look, he's the one
with the girl.
244
00:15:30,153 --> 00:15:32,186
All right, Fez. So
where'd I go wrong?
245
00:15:32,236 --> 00:15:36,369
Well, Danielle said you were a bad listener
and I'm a good listener. I heard her.
246
00:15:36,569 --> 00:15:39,619
But so what?
I hurt girls all the time.
247
00:15:39,669 --> 00:15:42,552
No, not "hurt."
Heard. I heard.
248
00:15:42,602 --> 00:15:45,335
- You heard what?
- Danielle. I heard Danielle.
249
00:15:45,385 --> 00:15:49,235
Why'd she choose you over me?
Jeez. It's like talking to a 2 year old here.
250
00:15:50,719 --> 00:15:56,191
She chose Fez because he listens when a
woman talks instead of staring at her chest.
251
00:15:58,891 --> 00:16:00,908
Stop staring
at my chest!
252
00:16:00,975 --> 00:16:04,865
I'm sorry. Look, I've been
screwed by darwinism.
253
00:16:05,208 --> 00:16:10,075
I never needed to evolve listening skills
'cause my looks are so highly developed.
254
00:16:10,842 --> 00:16:13,590
Oh, that's not
how evolution works.
255
00:16:13,624 --> 00:16:15,157
Yeah, sure it is.
Look,
256
00:16:15,190 --> 00:16:18,807
say I had to catch my own food, right?
But I only ate really fast animals.
257
00:16:18,840 --> 00:16:22,140
My feet would eventually
evolve into rockets.
258
00:16:25,707 --> 00:16:29,606
Man, it's amazing your brain
doesn't evolve into pudding.
259
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:32,635
All right, Fez, come on.
I need your help.
260
00:16:32,668 --> 00:16:34,568
Why should I help you?
261
00:16:34,685 --> 00:16:36,218
B-because you owe me.
262
00:16:36,268 --> 00:16:40,685
Think about all the times that I set you up
with my dates' less-pretty friends.
263
00:16:41,352 --> 00:16:44,180
That's true. You have
thrown me some uggos.
264
00:16:45,130 --> 00:16:48,064
All right, so show
a little appreciation.
265
00:16:48,430 --> 00:16:49,630
Fine.
266
00:16:49,830 --> 00:16:53,147
But you have to promise not to use what
I teach you on Danielle to get her back.
267
00:16:53,191 --> 00:16:54,841
- She's mine.
- Done.
268
00:16:55,307 --> 00:16:57,241
Okay, Donna,
I need your help.
269
00:16:57,424 --> 00:17:00,591
Now sit here
and pretend to be a girl.
270
00:17:01,257 --> 00:17:03,641
Now tell a girlie story.
Kelso,
271
00:17:03,707 --> 00:17:06,407
you listen and repeat
back whatever she says.
272
00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:09,590
- Okay, you ready?
- Yeah.
273
00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:12,790
Kelso, I had the worst day.
274
00:17:12,823 --> 00:17:15,907
I didn't know what shoes to wear--
with a heel, without a heel...
275
00:17:15,957 --> 00:17:18,340
I'm running out of firecrackers.
276
00:17:19,448 --> 00:17:22,681
I bet I could a been best
friends with spider-man.
277
00:17:24,375 --> 00:17:26,275
Is that a new muscle?
278
00:17:26,841 --> 00:17:30,858
Well, hello, new muscle.
Welcome to Kelso town.
279
00:17:30,925 --> 00:17:32,525
Kelso.
280
00:17:32,575 --> 00:17:34,042
Kelso!
281
00:17:34,075 --> 00:17:34,942
What?
282
00:17:34,992 --> 00:17:36,925
You weren't
even listening.
283
00:17:36,958 --> 00:17:37,992
How do you know?
284
00:17:38,025 --> 00:17:41,458
'Cause you were staring at the ceiling
with your tongue hanging out.
285
00:17:41,675 --> 00:17:43,558
Kelso, when a woman talks,
286
00:17:43,592 --> 00:17:47,542
you have to look her in the eyes and pretend
her words are like oxygen and without them,
287
00:17:47,575 --> 00:17:49,309
you can't breathe.
288
00:17:51,275 --> 00:17:53,909
But I don't care
what she says.
289
00:17:55,666 --> 00:17:57,682
How the heck
did you ever get a girl?
290
00:17:57,732 --> 00:18:02,149
I don't know. I just stare at her
until she stops talking, then I kiss her.
291
00:18:02,566 --> 00:18:04,232
Unbelievable.
292
00:18:15,329 --> 00:18:16,704
All right, Kitty.
293
00:18:17,387 --> 00:18:19,837
I want you to be
happy, I really do.
294
00:18:19,920 --> 00:18:24,520
And to make that beautiful,
illusive dream come true,
295
00:18:25,037 --> 00:18:28,910
I'm willing to try
page 46.
296
00:18:30,177 --> 00:18:31,927
Really?
297
00:18:32,127 --> 00:18:35,427
Oh, Red, thank you.
298
00:18:36,210 --> 00:18:37,743
Oh.
299
00:18:39,225 --> 00:18:43,792
Page 46--
that is so fancy.
300
00:18:44,509 --> 00:18:45,725
What?
301
00:18:46,425 --> 00:18:48,892
Oh, dear god, no!
Not, uh,
302
00:18:48,942 --> 00:18:53,237
not page 46. I meant
page 47. Page 47.
303
00:18:53,803 --> 00:18:56,670
And no funny stuff
after I fall asleep.
304
00:19:00,850 --> 00:19:04,433
And I didn't know what to do because I had
just polished my nails and I didn't wanna
305
00:19:04,467 --> 00:19:07,483
mess up my manicure.
306
00:19:07,917 --> 00:19:11,155
You're such a good listener.
I can't take it anymore.
307
00:19:11,288 --> 00:19:13,305
What are you doing?
Get off my lady!
308
00:19:13,338 --> 00:19:16,172
- Fez!
- You shut your hot little mouth.
309
00:19:16,738 --> 00:19:18,972
You promised you wouldn't use
anything I taught you on Danielle.
310
00:19:19,005 --> 00:19:22,520
Come on, you can't give me a gun
and expect me not to shoot people with it.
311
00:19:23,154 --> 00:19:25,004
Danielle, you have to choose.
Him or me?
312
00:19:25,054 --> 00:19:27,420
- But I--
- I said choose, woman!
313
00:19:27,770 --> 00:19:31,970
Well, Fez, if I have to choose between the
two of you, I mean, the choice is obvious.
314
00:19:33,350 --> 00:19:34,917
I choose you, Fez.
315
00:19:34,967 --> 00:19:36,950
What are you, stupid?
316
00:19:37,650 --> 00:19:41,100
I mean, I mean, of course.
Yes, good choice. Yes.
317
00:19:41,167 --> 00:19:43,100
Wait. Him? How can
you choose him?
318
00:19:43,142 --> 00:19:47,075
I don't know. I guess I have this thing
for guys who boss me around.
319
00:19:47,408 --> 00:19:51,125
I'll meet you in the car, or
wherever you tell me to meet you.
320
00:19:51,975 --> 00:19:54,765
Oh, you'll meet me in
the car, and you'll like it.
321
00:19:55,198 --> 00:19:56,548
I will.
322
00:20:00,498 --> 00:20:01,565
Okay,
323
00:20:02,015 --> 00:20:03,848
Here's the thing, Fez...
324
00:20:04,665 --> 00:20:07,688
She's clearly a lunatic,
325
00:20:08,405 --> 00:20:13,472
Which means that she's gonna be super
hot in bed, so congratulations on that one.
326
00:20:13,655 --> 00:20:18,041
But you did snake her from me.
So I get a free punch.
327
00:20:19,674 --> 00:20:22,424
But you did snake her back, so...
328
00:20:35,176 --> 00:20:39,105
How do guys play fight
without getting into a real fight?
329
00:20:39,488 --> 00:20:44,838
Well, maybe'cause when they fight, Michael
doesn't elbow everything like a blonde tard-O.
330
00:20:46,272 --> 00:20:49,258
See? Now that is gonna
get your ass kicked.
331
00:20:49,725 --> 00:20:53,208
Oh, I'm gonna punch you
in your fat melon head.
332
00:20:53,258 --> 00:20:56,808
Good luck reaching
it, tiny loser.
333
00:21:12,314 --> 00:21:14,131
Thanks, Tommy.
334
00:21:18,031 --> 00:21:20,347
Is that bacon I smell?
335
00:21:20,714 --> 00:21:23,077
Oh, what a perfect morning.
336
00:21:24,535 --> 00:21:26,069
- Marco!
- Polo!
337
00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:27,927
Oh, my god!26986
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