Original subtitles

♪ ♪

Hombre: Lyle! Levantarse, Lyle!

Levántate.

Hombre: Facebook en vivo, la encontró desmayado, hombre.

La encontró inconsciente en su cara ... (indistinto).

No lo sé. Pero podría estar muerto, hermano. Espera, hermano.

(Mujer que habla indistintamente) Sí, espera, engañar.

Él might-- podría estar muerto, Jack.

Alan Spanos: Nosotros, los médicos estaban equivocados en el pensamiento

que los opioides no se pueden utilizar a largo plazo.

Ellos pueden ser, y que deberían ser.

Estamos acostumbrados a pensar que dejaran de trabajar

o que los pacientes se convertirían en los adictos

o que les gustaría ser sedados en la inactividad.

♪ ♪

Spanos: ahora nos encontramos con que estos medicamentos son mucho más seguros,

mucho más potente, mucho más versátil que utilizamos para pensar,

y creemos que deben ser utilizados mucho más liberalmente

para las personas con todo tipo de dolor crónico.

Hombre: Algunos pacientes pueden tener miedo de tomar opioides

porque se perciben como demasiado fuerte, o adictiva ...

pero eso está lejos de ser un hecho real.

Menos del uno por ciento de los pacientes que toman opiáceos

de hecho convertirse en adictos.

Hombre: ruidos de toma de Ella.

Ella está haciendo ruidos. ¡Yo!

Mujer: La respiración de ella. She's-- Vamos, bebé.

Hombre: La respiración? Mujer: Sí. Ella es ...

Ella está tratando a-- Vamos, chica.

Vamos, Jerry, despierta.

Jerry, despierta! Mírame.

Mírame, Jerry.

Oficial: Jerry, mírame! ¡Venga!

♪ ♪

Hombre: Despierta, chica! ¡Ahí tienes! Hombre 2: Woo-hoo!

Quédate con nosotros. Aférrate. Quédate con nosotros.

Cinco de alto, que estás vivo. Estás bien. Estas bien.

Hombre: ¿Estás bien? Estás con nosotros?

¿Estás haciendo bien?

Hey, quédate conmigo, hombre. Quédate conmigo.

Hombre: ¿Se puede despertar? Mujer: ¿Vas a estar bien?

¿Se encuentra ella bien?

Hombre: Yo, que está sobredosis. Al igual que, ¿qué coño, hombre?

Hombre: ¡Despierta! Hombre 2: ¡Hey!

(Gritando indistinta)

Hombre: ¡Despierta, despierta!

Despertar, muchacho!

Obtener agua, conseguir agua, conseguir agua!

Hombre 2: Verter agua en la primera.

El hombre: lo quieren también? Hombre 2: Joder, tío, porque ...

(Man 2 hablando)

Hombre: Lo sé. Hombre 2: Cualquier cosa podría haber sucedido.

(Niño que llora) ... Mami Mami!

Hombre: Oh, Dios mío.

¡Mamá! (llorando)

¡Mamá!

♪ ♪

Periodista: Aplicación de la ley dice que nunca han visto el abuso

de una seta de medicamentos recetados fuera de control tan rápido.

Newsman 2: Estos medicamentos todos pertenecen a una familia de medicamentos llamados opioides.

Mujer: Y analgésicos recetados conducen a la heroína.

Newswoman: Es un narcótico, estrechamente relacionada con la heroína y la morfina

con el mismo potencial de adicción.

♪ ♪

Stephany Gay: Si somebody'd me dijo hace seis años

que iba a ser un adicto a la heroína,

Yo hubiera pensado que estaban locos.

Ni en un millón de años.

Yo no salgo con niños malos.

No he tenido problemas.

II acaba nunca habría pensado alguna vez que le puede pasar a mí.

Cuando tenía unos 16 años,

Empecé a recibir los cálculos renales,

y que me iban a dar medicamentos para el dolor por ello,

porque eso es prácticamente todo lo que podían hacer.

Kathy Kelly: Los rayos X mostraría los cálculos renales.

No hubo fingiendo, nada.

Es decir, aquí es un niño, 15, 16 ...

que había estado sobre la edad que comenzó a conseguir 'em,

um, y ella está haciendo 'em every-- par de veces al año.

Stephany: Me dio una inyección de Dilaudid,

que es un analgésico muy potente.

Y entonces recuerdo que me enviar a casa,

con una prescripción de Oxycontin

y una receta de Vicodin.

Kelly: Y recuerdo que pensé en ese momento,

"Wow, esas son la clase de medicamentos de alta potencia para una persona tan joven,"

pero yo confiaba en los médicos.

Stephany: En el principio, me gustaría simplemente tomar mi Vicodin

según lo prescrito cuando estaba en el dolor,

pero, al igual que, gradualmente empeoró con el tiempo.

Se adormece mis sentimientos y me hizo sentir como ...

bien de todo.

Usted sabe, "Estoy bien. Estoy-- estoy bien."

(Lamentos sirena)

Ya sabes, me gustaría tener uno extra aquí o allá,

y luego, si se me acabó, me gustaría fingir

al igual que yo no sabía lo que estaba mal conmigo, para que yo pudiera conseguir más.

Ya sabes, fingiendo dolor para ir al hospital para obtener analgésicos.

Es decir, sería algo de Oxycontin,

a Vicodin a Norcos.

A continuación, se pasó de tomar la dosis prescrita

como uno de cada seis horas

a tomar, como, 20 Norcos un día.

Estoy pasando por una receta mes en dos días.

Y llamé a mi madre llorando, y yo estaba como, "No sé lo que me pasa."

"Mamá ... No puedo dejar de tomar estos,

Porque cuando deje de tomarlos, no me siento bien ".

Le dije: "Bueno, tenemos que hablar con su médico."

Y él me escribió otra receta para Percocets,

lo que era más fuerte que los Norcos que había estado tomando.

Mi hermana, Ashley ...

ella era la persona más cercana a mí en todo este mundo.

Lo hicimos todo juntos.

Me gustaría conseguir analgésicos, y me gustaría, como, ya sabes,

cuando empecé a recibir mal con ellos

ella era curioso, porque lo que hizo, lo hizo.

Por lo tanto, para ir a dormir, ella sería como, "A ver si uno de sus pastillas.

A ver si uno de sus analgésicos para ir a dormir. Dame un Vicodin ".

Y me gustaría darle uno, ya sabes,

y ella sería como, "Oh, Dios mío, me encanta esto."

Kelly: Se compartiría ellos entre sí.

"Oh, tengo un dolor de cabeza." "Oh, bueno, aquí, se puede tomar una de mis pastillas."

Um ... los dolores menstruales.

Una hermana compartir medicamentos con otra hermana.

Stephany: Nunca había estado expuesto a las drogas como eso.

No sabíamos lo que podría suceder, ¿sabes?

Sólo pensamos, como,

"Bueno, nuestro médico nos empezó a dar, ya sabes,

estos analgésicos, por lo que no puede ser tan malo ".

Bueno, entonces él la cortó en ellos,

y entonces ella no se sentía bien.

Sus amigos dicen, "Oh, bueno, aquí, voy a dar usted-- tomar la mía."

Sino que se hicieron caro comprar privada de los amigos,

y los médicos no 'em darían a ella nunca más.

Por lo tanto, este amigo le dio una pequeña bolsa,

y dijo: "Sólo oler esto.

"Te va a hacer lo mismo que hacen las píldoras,

"Lo único, no es necesario tomar cinco pastillas.

"Basta con echar la bolsita, olerlo,

y se sentirá mejor ".

¡Y funcionó!

Ella lo tomó y funcionó.

Recuerdo que pensé, como, "Wow. Esta es la mejor sensación del mundo."

Fue realmente, como ...

Tenía, como, no es una preocupación en el mundo.

Me hizo sentir como si pudiera hacer nada.

Me sentía como mujer estupenda.

Es mucho más barato que ...

la compra de 15 Norcos al día a cinco dólares cada uno.

Ya sabes, "Aquí está una bolsa de diez dólares de heroína,

y que le va a durar tres días ".

No tenía ansiedad o no me sentía deprimido.

Me sentía feliz, me sentí caliente.

Sentí que me quería, y me encantó volver.

Se sentía como si estuviera en, como, una relación con ella,

al igual que, me sentí como si tuviera una relación con la heroína.

Fue simplemente la mejor sensación del mundo.

Aspiré a la heroína durante aproximadamente un año.

Yo y Ashley tanto lo hizo.

Kelly: Ellos no sabían

el alcance de la adicción a las que se enfrentaban,

como una ola.

Ya sabes, que está de pie en una playa, y tienes esta ...

50 pies de ondas que vienen en usted.

Y recuerdo Ashley diciendo:

"No es como que estamos pegando agujas en los brazos, mamá."

Stephany: "Eso es para los adictos reales.

"Usted sabe, nunca haré eso.

"Nunca voy a tocar una aguja.

Eso es repugnante, eso es grave ".

Y en alguna parte ... a lo largo de ese tiempo,

alguien introduce la aguja a ellos.

Stephany: es suficiente con hacer un poco pequeña,

y se obtiene, ya sabes, diez veces más alta,

y tiene una duración de diez veces más largo,

pero entonces, que, al igual que, hace tan fuera de control tan rápido.

Si tenía suerte, ya sabes,

sólo me tomaría diez minutos para golpear una vena,

y entonces podría ir acosté.

No tenía las venas que quedan.

Es decir, en el cuello, y el lado de mi cara,

palmas de las manos, los dedos,

Es decir, al igual que, en el pecho,

y que estaría cubierto de sangre.

Sólo quiero dormir todo el día,

hasta que me desperté de estar enfermo de nuevo,

y entonces tendría que pasar por todo de nuevo.

Cuando empecé a usar ...

Tenía mi propia casa de tres dormitorios, dos pisos.

Yo era una madre y ama de casa con mi hija de dos años de edad, hija.

Yo y mi hija de padre,

cada uno tenía nuestros propios coches nuevos.

Hemos tenido una piscina en nuestro patio trasero, que tenía dos perros.

Tenía, al igual que, la vida perfecta.

En el momento en que empecé a inyectarse heroína,

Había perdido mi casa.

Habíamos vendido tanto de nuestros coches,

y he perdido la custodia de mi hija.

Kelly: Me acuerdo Ashley diciendo:

"No quiero seguir con esto."

Ya no era una fiesta,

y ella era un esclavo de ella.

(Cuerno toca la bocina)

Stephany: Se metió en una pelea con su prometido,

y ella fue a buscar un motel.

Estaba limpia en el momento, y yo ...

No pensé que ella estaba usando.

Kelly: Ashley había estado en tratamiento.

Se había quedado en apenas el tiempo suficiente

para obtener a través del tiempo de espera,

y se sentía bien,

y luego salió de un tratamiento temprano.

Fue entonces cuando se puede tomar ellos porque piensan

que pueden utilizar lo que estaban utilizando antes.

Ellos dicen: "Bueno, lo hice mucho"

um "por lo que puedo manejarlo", y que no pueden.

Su cuerpo es volver a lo que era.

Y cuando me diría a mi hija,

"Estoy muy preocupada por ti, Ashley,"

ella dirá,

"Mamá, estoy-- yo soy demasiado joven y bonita para morir.

Estaré bien. Voy a vencer a este ".

Stephany: Pienso que tal vez pensó

ella sólo podía hacerlo una vez más

y conseguir que la muy buena altura,

y luego no hacerlo más.

Y es como ... que una vez, nunca se sabe.

(Llamando a la puerta)

Stephany: Su novio me llama, y ​​él estaba en el motel,

y ella no estaba respondiendo a su teléfono.

(Detonaciones se hace más fuerte)

Stephany: Me llamó y estaba, como, histérica.

(Golpes en la puerta)

Stephany: Empezó a golpear las puertas.

He called 911, and told the operator,

"My girlfriend is a heroin addict.

"She's not answering her phone.

"I know she's in trouble.

Please come to this hotel and help me."

(pounding continues)

Stephany: I remember where I was at.

I was at the Taco Bell drive thru.

I remember seeing the police station's number come up on my phone.

And I remember picking up the phone,

and it being a man's voice.

He was like, "I'm sorry for your loss."

And I was just like...

I was like, "What are you talking about?"

And, um, he's like,

"I need you to come into the police station."

And I just-- I knew.

And...

It was like my whole world just, like, stopped.

It was the worst nightmare that anybody could have.

I miss her every day.

Desde la mañana hasta la noche, que es una cosa todo el día.

Stephany: Yo era un suicida cuando perdí a mi hermana.

Me acaba de hacer grandes cantidades,

$ 200 en medicamentos,

en una hora, en una sesión.

Sólo la oración, como,

"Por favor, no me dejes despierto.

Yo no quiero vivir más ".

Stephany: Ella era como una segunda madre a Audrey.

Ella actuó como Audrey era su hija.

Ya sabes, ella would--

Ella se haría cargo cuando me estreso o ...

Kelly: Ustedes dos eran inseparables.

Stephany: Nunca se puede imaginar volver a ...

vivir como yo era.

Nunca pude imaginar volver a ...

pegue a mí mismo con agujas,

15 veces al día durante horas a la vez.

He estado limpia durante el tiempo suficiente para dónde ...

me da miedo, la idea de usar,

porque sé que una vez me podría matar.

Se trata de un tiempo-- fundamental

ahora que usted, usted tiene el tiempo de limpieza.

Ella tenía eso, que el tiempo de limpieza,

y luego se utiliza ...

y me siento como si estuviera ...

estás ahí, y es tan aterrador.

Cada vez que recibo una llamada en medio de la noche,

II conseguir que la sensación de la tripa.

Todo se contrae.

No podía imaginar ...

que le pone a través de la pérdida de otra ... niño.

(estornudos)

(olas del mar rompiendo)

(Gaviota llorando)

Britt Doyle: Esa foto ...

fue tomada cuando era, creo, seis años de edad.

En cierto modo me acuerdo de ese día, como un poco,

pero recuerdo que esa foto fue ...

en su habitación siempre, porque ella dijo que era su foto favorita de nosotros,

y me gusta mucho también. (risas)

Esta cruz ...

ella me dio cuando mis padres se separaron,

porque told--

Yo estaba muy triste un día, y yo estaba como ...

"Mamá, no voy a ser capaz de volver a verte.

Yo no voy a vivir contigo"

y ella era como,

"Tengo el mismo collar.

"Te voy a dar a éste,

"Y si usted lo usa, entonces estamos gonna--

"Sólo sabemos que estamos juntos,

y sólo sé que yo estoy pensando en ti ".

"Estimado Preston,

"He disfrutado cada minuto de nuestro tiempo en Tahoe.

"Usted es este joven asombrosa

que me hace orgullosos todos los días,

"Y más cada año.

"Hay cosas increíbles que le esperan en el futuro.

"Usted es un éxito en la vida ...

"Y siempre lo será, porque tiene esa chispa especial

"Que hacer y disfrutar la vida al máximo.

te quiero. XO, mamá ".

Y leí que ...

literalmente cualquier momento tengo ningún tipo de problema en mi vida,

porque no es sólo el hecho de que ella escribió eso.

Es sólo que ... no sé,

sólo demuestra qué clase de persona que tenía a mi lado durante todos esos años.

Aquí hay una captura de pantalla de un texto que me envió.

(Texto de lectura de Harry)

Y, eh, que no quiere decir que enviar.

Le gusta...

era sólo probablemente alta de la cabeza.

♪ ♪

(Risas) Eso quiere decir imagen.

Lo sé, lo siento. divertida de éste.

Espere. Britt: Whoa!

Britt: Bajar! Estoy delicado, y no me gustan las cosquillas.

Wynne: No se le cosquillas. (Britt ríe)

Yo estaba tratando de pedir un deseo en su barriga, grandísimo Biddy.

(Chillando, la risa)

(Wynne hablando)

(Britt ríe)

¡Ay! ¡No esta pasando!

Britt: Y ella se limpia la nariz con mi pelo.

(Riendo)

Doyle: Cada uno de nuestros tres hijos fueron cesáreas,

but the third one was a particularly hard pregnancy,

so when Wynne got out of the hospital,

they gave her a lot of...

uh, prescriptions, I mean, in a row.

I had no idea

that she'd been given Oxycontin,

or Vicodin or any of the opiates that we all know about now.

We had no idea that there were any dangers.

About a month and a half after the baby was born,

Wynne was starting not to get out of bed.

And that's when I started finding

the pill bottles around the house.

All of a sudden, now there's pills all the time,

and there's more and more doctor visits,

and there's more and more trips to the pharmacy,

and she's getting less and less interested in anything.

She was hiding 'em,

and she was getting 'em from multiple doctors.

Different doctors that started showing up on pill bottles.

Los médicos se acaba de tirar las pastillas en ella.

Y para el final del año,

usted sabe, ella sólo era una persona totalmente diferente.

Completamente diferente.

Era como Jekyll y Hyde.

♪ ♪

Cuando estábamos saliendo,

Nunca había pensado en cualquier tipo de adicción,

o alcohol, es decir, nada.

Salimos un par de veces a la semana.

Nos gustaría ir a restaurantes y beber vino.

Es decir, no había nada.

Es decir, nunca vi nada.

Ella fue impulsado, y divertido estar cerca,

y se sintió bien.

Tuvimos un par de niños, que era una gran madre.

Nos íbamos de vacaciones.

Fuimos a visitar con la familia.

Tuvimos amigos a través de todo el tiempo. Tendríamos las cenas.

Se crió muy bien.

Ella era, como, una estrella de la pista,

a campo traviesa, a la animadora, todo el mundo la quería.

Yo sólo miraba siempre hacia ella cuando era pequeña,

and being like, "That is the most beautiful woman, like, ever."

And I'd wear all of her clothes, all of her jewelery,

I would do makeup with her

ever since I was-- I could walk, I feel like. (chuckles)

Doyle: Christmas morning of 2000,

about five or six months after the baby was born,

I woke her up, and it had been a couple of days

since she'd been up,

and, uh, I got the kids out of bed,

and, you know, she didn't even realize it was Christmas.

I asked her if she would consider

going to a treatment facility,

and I had already talked to Betty Ford Clinic down in Palm Springs.

She stayed for three days and then went missing.

I went down and tried to find her.

She'd checked into a motel, and...

she was passed out.

I had just no idea what was going on.

She went to a second rehab facility,

y pensé, ya que podría permitir en el momento,

quizás este lugar sería mejor porque era tres veces más caro.

Cuando ella desprotegido 28 días más tarde,

que tenía un montón de nuevas pastillas ...

y sucedió de nuevo.

Ella iría en torno a diferentes médicos,

diciéndoles que no tenía dolor.

Ya sabes, que haría algo para herir.

La vi cerrar de golpe la mano en la puerta del coche una vez

simplemente para que pudiera ir a la sala de emergencias,

y los médicos siempre le darían algo,

Vicodin o Oxy o algo así.

Ella rompió ambas muñecas,

y ella tenía ...

um, esto- no sé cómo ...

que tenía como un molde en ambos de ellos,

y tan pronto como todos eran sanados de nuevo,

ella hizo algo que se rompió de nuevo.

En repetidas ocasiones, al igual que el ciclo había terminado, y otra vez,

donde ella había hecho daño a sí misma,

y luego obtener la medicación, y luego se iría fuera, y se van.

Mi padre siempre me dijo que era "escuela de cocina."

Una vez que fui creciendo, empezamos a darnos cuenta de que, al igual que,

ella va a rehabilitación en este momento, pero ...

Es no-- ... no es gonna-- no va a funcionar.

Se llegó al punto en que era tan común,

Yo estaba como, "Tal vez ella era realmente así."

Pero luego me di cuenta cuando estaba limpio,

su estado de salud y apenas se veía increíble,

pero cuando ella era alta, era como ...

era como si estuviera caminando dormido,

al igual, que no era en absoluto a sí misma.

Simplemente, como, sus ojos eran diferentes,

su discurso era diferente,

su forma de andar, todo en ella era realmente fuera.

Preston: Cuando estaba limpia, que era un ser humano increíble,

y simplemente la mejor madre,

and I'd trust her with my life when she was sober,

but I had to do things that most kids wouldn't have to.

It almost felt like I was the parent.

It's like the roles switched,

where I'd be searching her room for-- for drugs.

Whenever I'd open drawers, there would be pills hidden.

There would be pills in the bathroom counters.

You know, in her coat pockets, or in her shoes,

in her sock drawer,

I mean, in the back of the food pantry, or wherever.

They were everywhere.

Her family was ashamed.

Every Christmas was a disaster.

All of a sudden, we're losing friends,

people didn't want to be around us.

Doyle: I think at this point, the kids...

they were just starting to understand it.

The reason why I would keep them out in the evenings, you know,

and always filled their days with things, you know.

I mean, at one point, I had all three of 'em in Little League,

which was a disaster for me,

because I'm driving all over the place.

Two practices and a game for each one of 'em every week.

You know, we'd have dinner out all the time,

and movies, and you know.

It was exhausting.

I'm trying to keep them away

from wanting to go upstairs and see their mom in bed.

We knew there was a problem, but there was nothing that

we could say or do that was gonna change it,

so it just became part of our life.

Doyle: In 2008, like seven years into it,

a rehab facility in Malibu called and said,

"Are you not coming for family week?" And I said, "No, I've had it.

"You know, I'm not coming to anymore family weeks.

I've been to too many already."

And they said, um...

"Well, it sounds to me like you're done."

And I said, "I don't even know what that means."

He said...

"Well, if you're thinking about a divorce,

"we... we really ought to think about that while she's here,

"so that she doesn't come home to that

and not have a support group."

I mean, it was the first time anybody had ever said...

that I actually...

you know, could get out, so...

um, I...

I filed...

and moved the kids out.

♪ ♪

When we divorced,

Wynne got half custody,

and started living in San Francisco.

The kids would visit her.

They're getting older.

They're starting to really develop

a relationship with their mom

that's separate from me.

Harry: The last house that we lived at with her

was in the South Market, and the Embarcadero.

And I used to skate on the Embarcadero at 10:30,

'cause she would allow me to, like, leave the house,

like, she gave us that much freedom.

It was just like my favorite feeling in the world.

♪ ♪

This was her house, you see, with all these candles.

Man: Oh, that's cool, yeah.

Doyle: When the kids were with her,

I was always on edge.

Then it really just became about safety.

I became this hyper-vigilant sort of guy,

and she was fine,

but I knew it wasn't gonna last.

It just slowly deteriorated again.

♪ ♪

I heard from the kids that she was going into the hospital

because she had a kidney stone that they had to remove.

She had been taking a lot of opiates,

and once she got to the hospital,

they were giving her what a normal person

would be getting as a dose when you have pain,

but it wasn't near the amount she'd been taking on her own.

So, there she is in a confined spot,

for four days going through withdrawals,

and it was just getting worse.

So, she left the hospital,

and they gave her a bunch of opiates on the way out.

Preston and Harry were staying with their mom.

Harry: Like, she had all these pills on the side of her bed.

"The hospital told me to take these," and I was just like,

just... please don't overdo this.

Like, there's a lot of pills here.

Eight bottles filled to the top,

and I was like, "Who gave you all of these?"

And she said, "Oh, my doctor did."

Like, "I'm still in a lot of pain from the kidneys."

And then, in the morning, she was just laying there

with her arms spread out, and her eyes were kind of open.

We said goodbye, and got no response,

and we thought that was odd.

Preston, like, pulled out his phone to, like,

take a video to just, like, show our father,

like, what was, like, going on.

And I told him, like,

"Put down the phone, like, right now."

And he's like, "Why?"

And like I, that was-- I was like grabbing her foot,

and it was just ice-cold.

And I called 911, they were telling me to do chest compressions on her.

I was just yelling at Preston to stop,

and he was just like, said, "We need to do everything we can."

and... it was, um...

I mean, that's when I had to call, like, my father.

And it just was surreal,

in having the conversation with Harry

as I can hear Preston in the background.

"Mom's dead. Like we-- we need to do something,"

and he just-- he didn't believe me, and I was just like,

"Just get to the city, like, right now."

And then hearing Preston screaming on the other--

You know, he's, um...

trying to give her compressions. (sniffles)

(sighs)

Doyle: By the end...

at the funeral, there were hardly any of her friends.

♪ ♪

Britt: When I saw the pills on her bedside table,

when she had passed,

that was probably the most anger I could feel ever,

because she's been to that hospital

easily like 50 times.

They've seen her there, unconscious, had to, like, pump her stomach

so many times,

and yet, she comes in there,

and they leave her, like, with more?

Doyle: I firmly believe that there are so many people

that are being prescribed opiates

without any direction or support

that have no idea what they're getting into,

and then, once they can't get out of it

the shame and the inability to actually confront it

and talk about it with somebody... makes it worse,

because now, all of a sudden, they're an addict.

(rain pattering)

(thunder rumbles)

(Kelly speaking indistinctly)

Do you like it so far?

I love it, I think it's beautiful.

I was thinking, maybe we would make one for your mommy.

That's what I would like to do when,

when I'm done with yours, if that's okay.

Let her know that we're thinking of her.

Kelly: I have adopted Audrey.

She needed stability, security,

and until my daughter could recover,

she just couldn't give her that.

Kelly: I'm trying to keep her a child.

I don't want her to grow up too fast.

But she's part of this,

and she's kind of my partner.

We have the Narcan,

and I dropped some off for her.

If something happened,

and I couldn't get over there,

do you remember what you would do?

Where-- where do I keep it?

In the top.

So I keep the Narcan right here.

This one is real easy access

for Audrey if she needs to.

I keep a couple of packs inside here.

Three, actually,

and it's two... two doses per box.

But this is really easy for her to reach.

I can get at it.

It's very visible in the red bag.

If she wasn't moving,

try to shake her? I would check if she was breathing.

Okay.

And, then, what's the next thing you would do?

Rub, rub the lips, try to stimulate her.

And then what would you do

if she didn't wake up?

Then I would take the... the Narcan...

Okay.

...and I would... and I would place it on her thigh,

her butt,

or right here. Yep.

Exactly. And then what do you do?

Then, call 911.

Right.

I'm gonna say a special prayer for your mommy today,

'cause she really needs it.

I know she's trying very hard,

and I know she misses you.

(both laugh)

I'm gonna bring some to Stephany.

I don't know what she's doing...

but it's always good to have it there, just in case.

And also...

a lot of times, they don't use alone.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

(kisses)

They're so pretty.

(sniffles)

♪ ♪

Gail Cole: When we found him,

the two of us pulled him off the bed.

I'll never forget the sound

of just the air coming out of his lungs.

For the longest time, I couldn't come in this room.

It's literally like the day he died.

It took me a year to come in

and throw his garbage out,

and I think I did that,

because I saw that the medical examiner

left the wrapper for the body bag in there.

I just-- I can't go through it.

I feel like it's like getting rid of him.

Brian Cole: Part of me takes great comfort in all of this stuff too.

Just reminds me of his personality, you know.

♪ ♪

Brian: I did everything possible

to-- to create a perfect life for a family.

Brendan: Brothers get together!

Brian (in video): All the brothers, hold on.

Brian: To have this happen is just

not even conceivable to me.

Brian (in video): Come on, Connor.

Gail (in video): Here's Brendan!

Hey baby, I'm not four yet!

Brian (in video): Yeah, Brendan!

(Gail speaking indistinctly)

Brian: That's his calendar, he was marking off the days when he was first...

Gail: Sober? Brian: ...sober.

I just thought it would be important for him to be able to

look at the calendar at the end of every day,

and cross it off, and say, you know,

"There's another day, I've done it."

You know? I just wanted him to have

some type of way of measuring his success.

Gail: When he had come out of rehab,

he looked the best he had in years,

He looked so healthy and was so positive.

And he said, "Oh, can I borrow the car? I want to go to the mall."

And I said, "Sure."

And he's only gone 45 minutes.

He's texting Brian pictures of shoes, of all things.

And he came back.

He poked his head in, I said, "You know,"

I said, "It's so nice to have you back."

He goes, "Thanks, Mom, I love you. Thanks for giving me another chance."

And, with that, I look at his face

and I'm, like, "Wow! He's high."

And, you know, the yelling, the screaming, and...

we agreed tomorrow would be another day.

And, um, I went to sleep.

Brian fell asleep on the, on the couch,

and woke up at around one o'clock, by the grace of God.

He found him kind of laying at an odd angle on the bed.

He turned on the light and screamed.

His lips were turning blue.

He was unconscious. He was barely breathing.

And you were screaming, we're shaking him,

calling 911.

The police came, the ambulance came,

and then Mobile Intensive Care came

and they revived him with Narcan...

and he walked out the front door to the ambulance.

When we got into the emergency room,

nobody really talked about the withdrawal from the Narcan,

and there was no real game plan

for what to do after overdosing.

So, we got in the car and I drove him home,

and I could, could barely even speak to him.

I was just so furious.

He was, you know, sleeping in the front seat,

and we pulled in the garage and I said,

"Do me a favor, would you just take a shower and try to get yourself together?"

And he goes, "I can't."

And I didn't really understand,

but I've learned, after the fact,

that when you're going through withdrawal,

it hurts to shave, it hurts to shower, it hurts to brush your teeth.

He went up in his room.

The door was open.

We had his laptop, we had his cellphone.

We had taken all those away,

so he was, you know, kind of in lockdown.

That was at 1:30 in the afternoon.

And then about 2:30, Brian came up

and said to him, he goes,

you know, kind of tussled his hair, and said,

"You know... you got a second chance.

Not everyone gets a second chance."

He goes, "You better not waste that second chance."

And that was probably the last thing anyone said to him.

It was about quarter to three, and I came upstairs,

and he was kneeling with his hands on his head.

And, to this day, I wish I would have said something to him.

I wish I would have come over and said,

"You know, B, I love you. It's going to be okay."

Connor came home.

It was 20 after three, or so, and he said, "Where's B?"

I said, "I don't know. He's upstairs kneeling next to his bed."

And he went upstairs.

And he must've tried to...

move him and shake him, and he screamed.

And we called 911 immediately.

And everyone-- Connor's throwing up,

and everyone's screaming,

and Brian had run over and got our neighbor

who was a doctor.

It was a nightmare.

They, uh, made us leave the room.

And they tried to revive him again with the Narcan,

but it didn't work.

They had worked on him for about 40 minutes.

I knew. I just, I knew he was gone.

You know, you prayed, you hoped. You did everything, but...

And probably at about 4:20,

our neighbor pronounced him dead.

He had used heroin again.

We found this old stuffed animal

that had old baggies of heroin and a syringe in it.

I had the hardest time, and so did Brian,

wrapping our head around that.

Why would he have done that?

Like... he knew we loved him.

He knew we wanted to, you know,

send him back to rehab and get him help.

And what could you be thinking,

that, like, that love wasn't enough.

Brian: One of the things that's always a regret

is that you completely underestimate

how hard the battle of addiction is.

I mean, you think that, if you drop everything,

and, you know, you get the right help,

that you'll be able to see your way through this

and help somebody, but it's not quite that easy.

I mean, I thought I knew Brendan like the back of my hand,

but it's a different person once this addiction kicks in.

As a father, you have this,

this guilt that it, it happened on your watch.

And it's just, you know, you can explain it away all you want,

and other people can tell you, you know, you did everything you could.

But that always will linger in the back of your mind.

You taking that also? Yeah.

And this? Yep.

(engine starts)

Gail: When Brendan overdosed,

we didn't know what happened.

Heroin? Like, you know, here we are, we're in...

we're in Allendale, we're in "Mayberry."

Heroin, you think a dark alley,

you think, you know, somebody on the streets,

not in towns like this.

♪ ♪

Gail: Just sign in. Nice to see you.

Man: Good to see you too.

Yeah, just sign in, make a name tag.

Gail: We formed a group "Hope and Healing After an Addiction Death,"

and we meet twice a month,

and it's for people who have lost somebody

to the disease of addiction.

I thought we would start by sharing our stories,

um, and, if you have a picture, that would be great.

Um, you know, just,

share your story and, and talk about what you went through.

I have two pictures of Georgia.

(Gail chuckles)

This is my favorite.

Gail: That's Georgia. Group: Georgia, Georgia.

This is her. This is her.

She's just all energy.

All, like, "Yeah!"

You know? And that's how she was.

(laughing)

David (on tape): Georgia. Hey, Georgia.

Come here. What?

David: When Georgia was born,

I remember that I was in the delivery room with her,

and I started talking to her.

I didn't talk to her like she was a newborn baby.

I talked to her like she was somebody who...

we had been waiting for,

and that she had been waiting to arrive.

Who is that?

David: Within minutes, we had our first conversation.

It was one-sided, but...

but it was, uh...

Judy: But she was special,

she was the first grandchild, first niece. David: Yeah.

And we took a lot of pictures of her doing nothing.

We thought it was so exciting.

Judy: She was just very happy.

It was a very special, happy time of life.

David: I had a nickname for her, I called her "Soda Pop,"

because she was bubbly,

and she was, like, you know...

you didn't want to shake her before opening her.

(laughing)

David: It was just a constant amazement.

You know, watching her unfold

into an amazingly bright, young child.

She died, um, Thanksgiving Day a year ago.

She was 26.

It's like she never knew what hit her.

But the way she described it with me was,

that, um, she was working with a group

that ran several group homes,

and she was an assistant in these group homes,

and one day, she was taking a break.

She was on the porch, and this was in 2011,

and she fell through a guard rail,

or a hand rail, on the porch.

Took a fall and went down.

Hurt her back and her hip,

and went and got prescribed these,

you know, monster painkillers.

It could have been anything from Vicodin,

OxyCodone, I'm not sure.

I know it was one of the heavier ones just by the way she described it.

And they gave her enough

that, by the time the prescription ran out,

she needed more.

And, then, this one night,

I came up the stairs to go into the bathroom,

and Georgia was in the doorway of her room,

and she was upset about not being able to find something.

So I said, "Okay."

I went into the bathroom,

and as I shut the door, in the middle of the floor,

was a glasses case.

David: Right? So.

Somebody dropped their glasses case.

I picked it up to put it on the counter,

and it felt weird.

And I opened it up,

and there was six bags of heroin,

and a syringe, and a couple of other things in there, and I just went...

"Oh, no, no, no, no." You know?

And she said she didn't know where it came from.

"Oh, my God," you know, it was just the whole thing.

And, and... (sighs)

So this was probably a month before it happened.

On Thanksgiving morning,

Judy woke me up about five o'clock, I guess.

And she said, "Something's wrong with Georgia.

I can't wake her up, and she's really cold."

So I went into the living room,

and Georgia was sitting,

the television was on,

she was sitting between the couch

and the coffee table on the floor

with her feet out in front of her,

and her hands folded in her lap.

She had just leaned forward like this.

And we had this little carpet-covered stool thing, you know, right there.

There was a syringe laying right on top of it,

and it looked like she had just dozed off.

And I went over to her and I--

and I could-- as soon as I touched her...

I don't know, at that point, you're just in something that you can't even...

describe.

Well, all of you probably could.

So, I put my hand around her neck looking for a pulse,

and her skin was starting to get that

real stiff kind of, you know...

If you've ever had a dead pet

that you've had to pick up, you know that feeling,

and I knew I wasn't going to find a pulse,

and then I got around, you know, I had turned on the lights.

So I got around in front of her,

and I picked her head up,

and I looked--

(exhales sharply)

(sobbing)

♪ ♪

David: I had called the police,

and they were on their way.

And whatever I said to Judy,

I let her know that Georgia was gone.

And we finally went outside

with our son, Eli, and

a man pulled up in a car,

parked across the street, and he got out with a camera,

a big camera in his hand,

and it was obvious that he was going to photograph the scene,

but as he was walking toward me,

we made eye contact,

and he said, "I'm sorry for your loss."

Pretty soon after that,

they were rolling her out of the front door on a gurney...

in a body bag. (sniffles)

That was the last time she was here.

This person that had been a part of my life

for more than 26 years...

(sniffles) would never be again.

I know she's, uh, she's here.

I feel her.

And I talk to her the same way I always have.

I miss her.

♪ ♪

Kelly: The last time I was with her,

she seemed fine.

Her outlook on things was hopeful.

And then...

all of a sudden, nothing.

She's not answering the phone.

She's not answering the door.

She started this relapse around the time

of Ashley's birthday.

(small dog barking)

(knocking on door)

Stephany?

Kelly: And, when she's using, it's a very dark,

small, closed world.

Stephany?

Steph?

Kelly: What happened?

We were together.

We were making plans.

(Stephany speaking)

Kelly: Nobody's given up on you, please.

Please, honey.

You can't do it on your own, sweetie.

You tried, you gotta go in.

(Stephany speaking)

Kelly: Why don't you get up, and...

you come back to the house, take a nice hot shower.

You'll feel better. Get dressed.

Okay? You ready?

Yeah.

Kelly: Okay.

♪ ♪

Oh, it feels a lot nicer in here.

Laura: Better than the majority of my clients.

I'm going to sit here.

Kelly: You want to try a little protein?

Whatever. Looks good.

Kelly: They're not chilled. I was drinking... (indistinct)

Laura: I can get some for you if you want--

Like ice tea, like this is really good.

Well, drink the ice tea. There's a, a pot of it in there, too.

If you want, I'll chill this, this is good for you.

All right. Kelly: I don't know how well you've been eating.

I haven't eaten in like two days.

I just need my clothes.

Kelly: Clothes? You've got them.

(Kelly speaking)

Laura: Mm-hmm.

I'm worried about that too.

Steph?

What are you doing? Stephany: I'm taking my medication!

You okay? Yes.

(Stephany speaking)

And I can't straighten it or close it.

Laura: This is the spoon of a heroin user.

She had it in her bag.

Stephany is feeling very anxious right now.

She's gonna be going into rehab.

She knows that she can't use.

♪ ♪

The program that we started is called "A Way Out."

We have seven police departments

in our county that are participating,

and someone can walk into the police department and say,

"I need help."

No repercussions whatsoever.

(Laura speaking)

Okay. (retches)

Okay.

Okay.

All right.

(door closes)

If you do have any sort of paraphernalia or drugs--

Stephany: I got-- gave it all to my mom.

Yeah, I've done her laundry before,

and I've asked her, "Is there anything in there that will poke me?"

Like how-- how many bags?

I just have, like, a backpack and, like, a carry bag

with clothes in it for when I go. Okay. So, what we'll do on, on our end,

is we'll go through it. Okay? Kelly: Yeah, that's...

just in case, she might-- It's part of the program,

so, whatever we find, it just gets disposed of.

(pills rattling)

Stephany: I definitely did not know that that one was there, Officer.

Just a little bit.

Kelly: What is it?

It's like really embarrassing. Officer: Okay.

It happens.

♪ ♪

Hi, this is Officer Jake Anderson with the Mundelein Police Department.

I am calling with an "A Way Out" participant.

Hi.

Oh.

Sure.

Well, I have, I've suffered with kidney stones.

Así es como me hice adicto a los opiáceos era

Había estado recibiendo cálculos renales desde que tenía dieciséis años,

Pero eso es todo.

Bueno.

♪ ♪

Stephany: Está bien.

Kelly: Yo culpo opioides de prescripción

para la adicción de mi hija.

Nunca monté

cómo se convierte uno en un usuario de drogas IV.

Eso fue ... eso fue el puente allí mismo.

Oficial: ¿Estás listo?

Sí. Yo te ayudaré a llevar algunas cosas aquí.

Kelly: Ella era todavía un adolescente cuando comenzó con ellos ...

estas píldoras realmente de alta potencia.

Y yo confiaba en los médicos.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪