Original subtitles

Handsome

Handsome, of course.

Obviously.

- Blond. - Rich.

Single.

Young.

A good kisser.

- But a virgin. - Yes, pure.

With soft skin, white teeth.

Polite.

Brave.

- Loving his work. - But not obsessed by it.

- Spending time with her. - Yes, altruistic.

Faithful.

Tender.

A good horseback rider.

And a good dancer.

Yes, athletic.

Intelligent.

An intelligent athlete?

I mean as a quality, "intelligent."

Why not.

Intelligent athlete?

SOMEDAY, MY PRINCE

All right.

Dear fairies, the situation is serious.

In 5 days, Sleeping Beauty will have slept 100 years

and no prince charming has come to kiss her.

All of you were at her christening.

As Godmothers of this poor child, you know the curse.

If no prince comes to wake her, she'll vanish.

And so will we.

Godmother, let's wait a little more.

The time isn't up, someone will come.

Really?

Where from? Do you know many prince charmings around here?

There is!

There is one... what's his name? Snow White's prince!

He's Snow White's.

Can't he kiss Beauty to wake her

and go back to Snow White?

Don't talk nonsense. She needs her own prince.

If we don't act know, she'll vanish.

I'm letting 2 of you go out into the world for the 1st time.

Blondine, Melusine, find a prince in Paris, city of love.

Why them?

They speak French. It can be helpful.

- I speak French too. - Poorly, Rose Petal.

Let's keep it simple.

Paris, the city of love!

Paris! Awesome.

Are you sure, Godmother?

It's risky, I know, but I see no other solution.

It's incredible!

Paris, Notre-Dame, Sacré-Coeur,

Moulin Rouge!

Nevertheless,

I've heard it's very dangerous!

Nonsense!

Paris is the most romantic city in the world!

I advise you to be as discreet as possible there,

while using your powers.

Don't transform people at the least offense. Is that clear?

- Crystal clear. - But...

we know no one there.

Do not worry.

We have correspondents all over the world. In Paris, it's...

- Puck. - That's it, Puck.

- He'll help you out. - Handsome?

Yes, but that's not the point.

I'm not sending you there to fool around.

If you lose your virginity, you lose your immortality.

Focus on your mission. Five days is short.

Beauty can rest easily, we'll find her prince.

Lucky you!

Will you bring back some perfume?

They won't have time for shopping.

A change of scenery?

My nieces are from out of town. It's a real shock to them.

- How do you open the windows? - The magic button on the side.

Don't get carried away. It's not a toy.

Look.

Here's two.

- And on the other side, look. - Yes!

- He'd be a match. - Sure.

And that one.

- It's going to be so easy! - I live a block away.

We're near the Champs-Élysées?

- What floor are you on? - The fifth.

- Without an elevator? - No elevator.

I'll put one in right away.

Put that away!

- Good evening, Mr. Puck. - Hello, Mrs. Desrivière.

- Here are my nieces. - Hello, ma'am.

- I didn't know you had nieces. - I do.

They're very pretty.

Have a good evening, Mr. Puck.

Goodbye, Mrs. Desrivière.

This isn't first class.

Come in, please.

Careful! I just varnished the parquet floor.

You'll feel at home here.

Please, come in.

THE ENCHANTED FOREST

This is from home.

I can't wait to go home!

2 years to go.

Why? Don't you like it here?

Oh... it's so different. You'll see.

It's kind of you to have us.

Titania told me all about Beauty!

She asked me for a prince, but I can't be everywhere.

Being a storyteller

and having to catch kids' attention isn't easy.

They have to keep believing in fairy tales.

Not easy, with all those video games!

You don't own a TV?

What for? I don't have a moment to myself,

between my work and my hobby.

Let me show you my elf cabinet.

Elves, now?

It may not seem like much, but this amounts to hours of work.

It's beautiful! Look at the 7 dwarves.

Yes, it's truly... splendid.

But it's fragile.

Let me show you your room.

You each have your linen, so everyone's happy.

I'll go check on the soup.

Does he think we're dwarves? Have you seen the size of the towels?

Stop it. It's sweet, he even embroidered our initials.

And only 2 hours away from the Champs-Élysées!

Who cares? At least we're in Paris.

- Girls, it's ready! - Coming!

Stop sulking. Come on!

I think we have everything. The Smurf left?

I guess.

- He left us money. - Which metro

to go shopping? - We'll deal with that later.

First: the prince.

Don't worry. Yesterday, they were everywhere.

- It'll take 5 minutes. - Blondine...

Wait up!

See.

- We have to go! - Coming.

Look, mom, fairies are leaving Puck's place.

- Hello, fairies. - Hello.

Take your bag, honey. Goodbye, fairies.

Let's go.

She looks like she's homeless!

Who cares? It's men we need to deal with.

I love those dresses.

That one is only wearing half her clothes.

Man, this is wild!

I swear to God, look at those chicks!

Hey miss, looking good. How about chatting?

- What are they saying? - Never mind.

Calm down. Pardon us, we're looking for the Champs-Élysées.

What's with the lame accent?

My accent? You think you're speaking normally?

Is this a joke? Looking for trouble, Céline Dion?

No joke. Go back to your Titanic.

Do you wish to frighten me?

Why am I speaking so?

Quiet down, the rest of you.

- They got it. Have a nice day. - Have a nice day, ma'am.

"Have a nice day"! What's with him?

- It wasn't my doing! - This sucks.

They were crazy. Chill, bro.

What is that, my dear friend?

It's like he's in Molière, man!

Intelligent, yes.

Athletic?

- And... are you rich? - What's it to you?

Well!

- I'm sorry, sir. - No.

What? He's blond.

But I think he dyed his hair.

He's gone, now.

Now he's really blond!

Excuse us, sir.

- Yes? - Hello.

We have a small problem.

We're looking for a man who might wake Sleeping Beauty,

and no one wants to participate.

Wake Sleeping Beauty? I'd love to.

Really? How kind.

We just have a couple of questions to see if you match.

- Go ahead. - Handsome and blond, yes.

- Are you single? - Yes.

- Rich? - Oh, yes.

- A virgin? - Of course.

- Brave? - I think so.

- Can you ride a horse? - No. Is it important?

- Yes. - What a shame.

I wish I could help you out. Go see in the metro.

It's full of prince charmings.

Really?

- Thank you! - You're welcome.

I don't know where he saw any princes down here.

Was he messing with us?

When we say we're fairies looking for a prince,

it doesn't work at all. People laugh at us.

What should we say?

First, change styles. They think we're nuts.

We'll blend in better.

- Do you suggest we go shopping? - Yes.

Thank you.

It's really gross.

I like it.

All right, but hurry up. We're not here to go shopping.

Don't worry. We're just dressing up as Parisians.

Come on.

Can you smell that?

It's your breath!

Is it because of what you drank?

I don't know. I feel totally relaxed.

That looks good.

Puck's money won't do.

We can't!

Should we rob a bank?

Do you think we have enough?

- Aren't your jeans too tight? - No.

I love it.

- I can't even bend my knees. - Walk without bending.

- Or take some with holes in them. - They can't sell torn clothes!

If I can be of any help, let me know.

What's this? It's wild!

An album by...

No, what you're holding.

The remote?

Do you sell them?

No, we only sell clothes here.

- Can you ride a horse? - Yes. Why?

Someone, finally! I'd been waiting.

What's this?

This embroidery?

So marvelous!

Is it silk?

This hair...

What's going on?

Why isn't he kissing me?

Oh my God! I've become ugly. I must have aged horribly.

I must be all wrinkled.

If only I could see myself!

A mirror! A mirror! No one has a mirror?

Girls! May I?

Hi Puck, what's up?

What's this?

Emily Loizeau. Never heard of her?

I'm the bearded woman Come on my block, it's carnival

The bearded woman! Do you want me in your capital?

Watch out!

- Have you found the prince? - Yes.

The TV!

What TV? What TV?

That's it! Come in.

- Jean-Jacques Puck? - Yes.

- Sign here. - But...

I didn't agree on a TV.

Don't touch anything here!

- And I trusted them! - Move out of the way!

Is there a remote?

It's magic! See that?

The Crow? What's he doing here?

Can you hear me?

Er, yes.

Er... yes!

A man who likes men just won't do.

Try to be more careful next time.

A man who likes men?

Look!

The "Parc des princes"!

There's a park with princes?

We've been wasting our time in the streets,

there was a park all along!

Big Game at the Parc des Princes

It's the fairies who live next door.

What a baby! She believes in fairies.

- You don't? - No, they don't exist.

You'll see if I don't exist.

- Where's Kevin? - Can't you see him?

With his little pointed ears. Believe in me now, don't you?

Mom, Kevin disappeared! Mom!

Was he bothering you in any way?

Make up your mind.

Turn him back into a boy.

If we can't have any fun...

So mature, huh?

A fairy, scaring kids! I mean, really!

Mom!

You think it's here?

- The driver said so. - It doesn't look like a park.

PARC DES PRINCES

How do we get in?

It looks closed.

Look at the pictures!

- Are they the princes? - Probably.

Good-looking fellows!

- We have abundance of choice. - Hello, princes!

How does it work? Where do we find them?

Are they roaming free?

How many can we send?

As many as we like.

They have numbers, how practical.

Look at numbers 18, 20, 24...

Excuse me, sir.

- We'd like to see the princes. - The princes?

The princes in the park.

The players?

- Yes. Them. - You should come for a game.

When is that?

Next one is on... Saturday.

No! Saturday will be too late.

We need a prince for Sleeping Beauty by Friday.

Sleeping Beauty?

- Oh, the show! - I've seen it.

The fairies guided the prince to the chamber in the tower

where the princess lay.

The look on her face!

Hush!

And how she's dressed!

I'm suing.

The prince saw Beauty

and moved towards her to give her the softest kiss.

What do you think?

He's perfect.

Excuse us, sorry.

Am I dreaming?

I bet it's for me.

They're messing with me!

Go take a hike. I'd rather be dead.

Lucky me.

Missed.

Missed again.

Missed.

Missed. Missed.

A bald guy, can you imagine? Just what we needed.

What a joke! Who do they think they are?

Those fairies changed Kevin.

Stop it now, darling.

It's that one.

Don't point at people.

Fairies don't really exist, like Santa Claus.

Santa Claus doesn't exist?

Sure, of course he does.

Not fairies. Not here. No fairies in the supermarket.

Sorry. You know what it's like.

Children have a wild imagination.

No, it's flattering to be mistaken for fairies.

You have a very sweet girl.

Are you staying with Puck?

Yes, we're his nieces, we're here for the week.

No, I already told you it was too expensive.

Wait. Take one, we have a bunch.

No, thank you. Keep your savings.

I'm not really in favor of candy.

We live in the middle of nowhere, in the countryside.

At least it's peaceful.

Very peaceful. Too peaceful: there are no young people.

Especially no young men.

We'd like to take the opportunity to meet people.

Don't we all? It's not so easy in Paris.

- Really? - Didn't we see your husband?

Guillaume? He's my brother. Aurore and I live with him.

I'm divorced and it's hard to find an apartment.

- Security deposits, agency fees... - She's still here?

It's been a month. You see more each day.

If not for my brother, it could be me.

- How about a drink? - We'd love to.

It's crazy! When did they do that?

The owners kept refusing to do any renovations, and now...

They're even installing an elevator.

An elevator? It's Christmas every day!

Look, darling. They repainted.

Sorry for the mess.

Aurore, put away your dolls. Your uncle doesn't like a mess.

- Here. - Thanks, mom.

Do you draw?

Yes, thanks to this job, I hardly make a living.

- It's for children's books. - Little red riding hood!

I love fairy tales.

I named my daughter like Sleeping Beauty.

I hope she won't wait 100 years

for the right man to kiss her.

That's for sure.

I'll get something to drink.

Dad, I'm scared.

Mom's new friends turned Kevin into a pig.

He surely deserved it, honey.

And mom said fairies are make-believe,

like Santa Claus, they don't exist.

Of course they do. Everyone exists.

Fairies, Santa Claus, Mickey Mouse: everyone.

My publisher's throwing a party.

Artists and writers will be there. If you're interested...

- Definitely! - Is your brother coming?

He'll watch Aurore. He doesn't like parties.

Hi everyone.

- Sorry I didn't warn you. - Hey.

I invited our neighbors.

Sure, it's your home.

My brother, Guillaume.

Blondine and Melusine.

"Blondine and Melusine." How original.

I love it. It fits them well.

Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you, Guillaume.

First time in Paris? A nice city, right?

I invited them tonight.

It's better than going on your own.

- I'll show you for dinner. - See you.

What did you cook?

He's perfect!

- Well... - What's wrong?

We don't have to rush and grab the first one we see.

You want to keep him for yourself.

"Nice to meet you, Guillaume."

Really! What are you implying?

It's just not him we need.

- Why not? He's free. - It's impossible.

Why? I don't understand.

- Because. - Because?

Because...

he can't have children.

So what?

So...

there's no end!

"They lived happily ever after and had many children."

- It won't work. - How do you know?

I heard the girl tell her dad over the phone.

"He's crying because he can't have any kids."

How sad.

Don't worry. We'll find one tonight.

I mean it's sad for him.

Well... that's life.

Plus, he prefers horses.

My brother's carriage.

What a beautiful dress.

5 E and a night of sewing, let's hope it works.

If you look poor at a party, no one talks to you.

- Why not? - It might be contagious.

I'll type the address.

We have cellphones, but can't use them.

Can you show us? Puck is still raising pine cones.

No problem.

Are there a lot of men who like men, in Paris?

Homosexuals?

Like everywhere, I guess, no more, no less.

No. There aren't any back home.

There must be. But in small towns, they often hide it.

How does one know if they're home...se...

They don't look at you the same.

They're not staring at your cleavage.

Try to kiss him, so you'll know.

If he recoils screaming, he's homosexual.

"Virginie...

"with love, Bernard."

If you're looking for a best-seller, this isn't it.

We just told a story that touched people.

Sure, of course.

My favorite moment is when Jonathan...

We were a really hit on the beaches, in St-Tropez.

Half the people read it.

It was awesome!

Summer publications, aside from us...

Since it's a big book, it's good to have all summer.

Thanks.

Boycotting champagne?

It's not really my thing.

- Know anyone? - Not really.

Except...

my cousin, and a friend. Here she is.

Finally, a non-celebrity! I was dying to meet one.

Are you mocking me?

No, not at all.

- Are you ok? - I'm sorry.

- I'm so sorry. - It's all right.

- Come with me. - Thank you.

- What's your name? - Pauline.

- Stan. - How mysterious.

Thanks.

- It's going to be a movie? - Fox is buying the rights.

We're off to Hollywood tomorrow.

Enough about us. And you?

I'm a manager in an agency...

Excuse me!

- You got it all over me! - Be careful.

- I stumbled. - You could apologize at least.

- I interrupted you. - "Delivered" us, actually.

- Another drink? - Please.

So...

apparently, you're rich, smart,

and yet still single. - I guess...

anything can happen.

Cheers.

Cheers.

- Fidelity, to you is... - Paramount!

It's fundamental. Without trust...

You smoke?

- Hello, sir. - Hello, Georges.

Careful.

So...

- Is riding your passion? - It always has been!

We're vice champions in hurdling.

There's no merit: our parents own a ranch.

A ranch!

- Do you like to dance? - We love to dance.

- Yes! Tango, salsa... - Cha-cha-cha!

Is your skin soft?

Very soft.

- How about some coke? - Some what?

No thank you.

I want to try. Have some. It can't hurt you.

One last thing.

Kiss him.

Perfect.

- So you're not homosexual. - Not really, no.

We're looking for a prince for...

No, no, no.

No, no, no. No!

It's not for us. It's for Sleeping Beauty.

What?

Which one first?

What are you going to do with that?

Send you over there.

Give it back!

What the fuck is going on?

What assholes!

Did we make a mistake?

I don't think so.

I'd like to get my hands on more of that...

Come on, let's go.

Bye, froggies.

Hear that? They're following us!

What creeps!

We don't care about them.

I can't see them!

Where are they? Poor guys, I feel sorry for them!

- I don't. - Should I change them back?

They got it now.

Now they're sexy.

I'm not impressed, Blondine!

Do you want any?

You should be looking for princes

instead of waving your wand!

Where are the princes?

Tell me where the princes are!

Where are the princes?

Oh my God! Bulls!

What do we do now?

What did Titania think? There'd be herds of prince charmings

in the city of love? "Your prince didn't show up?

"No problem. We'll send a fairy to find you one." Really!

Hey! The Eiffel Tower.

Blondine, will you stop? Blondine, listen to me.

- I'll turn it off. - You're not well.

- Make it sparkle. - Blondine, listen to me.

We won't make it. There are no princes.

Put it back, now.

Don't worry!

Look!

There's one.

Here we go!

Kissy kissy!

What did you do? Did you just send that bum?

My ring! Why not take my crown while you're at it?

D-3.

- Careful. - Watch your dog, bitch!

Here, ma'am.

He's just shaken up. You should hold him on a leash.

Thank you!

He saved a dog.

- Who did? - Your brother.

I didn't know how to thank you for the party.

- I hope you like brioche. - I love it!

Guillaume's leaving early.

Too bad, huh?

Oh no, no.

All my friends are into him, I'm used to it.

- He's focused on his work. - It's good to like your work.

Yeah... Did you meet anyone yesterday?

Not really...

Did you?

I'm sorry, I'll leave you.

Please. Stay.

Well...

I'll call you.

OK. Bye.

Thanks.

- You'll call him? - I didn't take his number, so...

You can't fall in love every time.

I don't know.

That's nice!

"What matters is love."

- Here. - No, I can't accept it!

Sure you can. I love it, but it was a gift from Aurore's dad.

I have to move on.

I'll do like everyone else, sign up on Adoptaprince.com.

- As for the magic of meeting... - Adopt a prince?

Never heard of it?

It's like a catalogue with men. Just chose your model.

Type "man," "blond," "dark-hair," whatever you like.

Type in his age, and a bunch of guys pop up.

Then you arrange a date.

Look, it's super easy.

If we had known earlier!

OK. Go ahead.

Click on "man."

Click on "blond."

Tada!

Just what we were looking for.

Melusine?

Are you...

Arnaud Clément? - Yes.

That's me.

So...

you're single.

And rich?

Yes.

I'm sorry... Are you really 30 years old?

Yes. 32, to be exact.

I've always looked older than my age.

And you said "blond." It's rather "bald," no?

- Are you sure you're 30? - Yes.

32, to be exact. I've always looked younger than my age.

This isn't going to work.

Let me try.

From the top.

How old are you?

I'm 15.

Well... I'll be 15 next month.

See. That wasn't so difficult.

I don't know if it's very moral.

Yes, I'm married. Living alone is sad.

You need someone for the kids, housework.

But I manage to cheat on my wife as much as I can.

I'm a real bullshitter.

What I get chicks to believe is incredible.

Whores are expensive.

At least Internet is free.

I can't take it anymore!

I can't take it!

What I like is for the woman to be asleep,

almost dead,

and that she let me do anything.

We'll never make it. 50 morons just came by,

and not a prince in sight. It's gone to pieces.

Well... I'll leave you.

I suck!

Why can I turn this moron into a cheese cover

but not into a prince charming?

Stop it. Don't be deterred. We've been unlucky,

but we'll find him.

Maybe if we speak with Pauline. Turn him back.

That Pauline, aside from charming losers

to fool around on her brother's sofa,

isn't much help.

Go easy on liquor. When you drink, you're not yourself.

It makes you jealous and aggressive.

I'm sorry, I...

Jealous? Me? Of her?

I'm sick of hearing you complain.

Since we got here, aside from waving your wand,

what have you done?

I'm a fairy, it's what I do.

You're not brain-impaired. Use it.

No, I don't have a brain, I have a wand.

So fuck you!

Looks good.

I can wave my wand too. Here.

- You're the bearded woman. - Bitch!

Shit. It's the Crow. He's at Puck's!

- I'm disappointed. - Understandably.

You're not up to the task.

I personally insisted that you be sent on this mission.

And now I find you in a bar,

fighting with the tip of your wands? Bravo! Great job!

And drugs.

- I found some in their room. - What?

- Drugs? - Yes, cocaine.

Not only is it a health hazard, but it's prohibited by the law!

We never brought cocaine.

- What does it look like? - This.

- How do you know that, Puck? - I... Young people.

Never mind. You're on a mission and we're counting on you.

We know.

It's not easy. Prince charmings don't grow on trees.

Oh, my babies! Just look through the window,

I see 10 who would do the trick!

We're not asking for the moon! A normal guy.

Not a bum, not a moron, a man.

So send them in.

You have 2 days left. Get on it.

And you, watch out. You let them bring in drugs!

I'm sorry, Crow. They're a lot to handle.

I'm sorry.

You're right, I shouldn't drink.

Tomorrow I'll stop. I promise.

Sure. We'll make it.

A normal one,

we can find that.

Not just normal, great!

We'd have to meet him by chance.

By chance... but this week.

Lose your virginity, and you lose your immortality.

- Your dress? - I'm not used to those jeans.

It's torture. And it's so ugly!

It's better if we split up. It'll add to our chances.

Good idea. You heard what the Crow said: send them in!

Puck circled all the places

where we'll find a bunch of perfect men.

Why not do it before? We lost 3 days!

First, I also have a job.

Second, I wasn't given this mission.

OK. Let's not mess up.

I'll take the men's department store

in several places.

You take the firehouses,

sports fields,

the stock market,

and the car show.

The car show?

- That attracts men? - Sure.

- Bye! - Good luck!

- Hi. How are you? - Great.

I'm so happy to run into you by chance.

I don't really know how to tell you this...

It's stupid for a country-girl...

I can't ride a horse and I'd love to learn.

It's not stupid at all. Many country folk never ride.

Pauline told me you were a good teacher.

Typically her.

Come to the arena,

I'll teach you. - Really?

Sure. Come by later.

We'll have lunch, and I'll give you a gentle horse.

For lunch, ok.

Ask Pauline for the address.

- See you later! - Yes! All right!

I'll ask for the address!

Bye.

I get where the bills came from.

I'm seeing your brother at the arena,

and I was wondering... Will he like it?

- You have a date? - He's teaching me how to ride.

Oh, I see. I didn't know you liked horses.

I do, a lot.

Okay. They're more into big sweaters and rubber boots.

Guillaume likes natural girls.

Oh... I messed up, didn't I?

I don't have a sweater. I'm never cold.

You can borrow mine.

- Here, take this one. - Thanks.

Your book is moving along.

You're never cold in winter?

No. For us fairies, heat and cold are the same.

"Us fairies"....

We're all fairies, aren't we?

- Away with the fairies. - Right.

- Hello, Guillaume? - Yes.

- It was bus 114, right? - There's a problem.

- Orlando's hurt. - Is it serious?

- Yes. It's the left foreleg. - The foreleg?

Surely a fetlock sprain.

I'm waiting for the vet, so for our date...

I understand, no problem.

I'll keep you up to date. See you later.

OK.

Hey.

Recognize me?

We met at that publisher's party.

Wait.

How's this?

Oh! Yes.

How funny.

You vanished with the Kleber brothers.

It's crazy what happened to them. You don't know?

They disappeared. A publicity stunt.

- Anything to get attention. - Yeah.

Still, I hate their book.

- You have a date? - No, not at all.

- Want to come posting? - Posting?

My pictures. Come, I'll show you.

I don't have time, I have a lot to do.

5 minutes. It's nearby.

OK. 5 minutes.

- All right? - Yes.

What's your name? I didn't ask you.

Melusine.

- Isn't that a fairy's name? - Yes.

And you?

Jack.

Like... Jack Bauer.

24?

- The TV show? Haven't seen it? - No. I've never had a TV.

You're not missing much.

- Why are you pasting pictures? - You think it's weird?

No, it's just I'd never heard of it.

Actually... I didn't want to put them in a museum.

Some I'm posting them everywhere with my magic wand.

- Will you help me out? - Sure.

- Unfold it. - OK.

- Like this? - Yes.

Who are these... But... Who...

Out of the way!

Oh, Father!

What idiots!

All at the same time! Move it!

What's all this about?

Please, quiet down. Quiet down!

Calm down, everyone will get in.

Be patient, please. Come on. Let's go...

Okay. Go ahead, sir.

Kiss her!

Can't he shave? It's really unpleasant.

Next one! You see she hasn't awoken.

Next!

It's a woman! Morons.

"They lived happily ever after and had many children"!

Next!

Mona Lisa?

No. Sleeping Beauty.

- Sleeping Beauty? Photo? - No, no photo. Kiss. Kiss.

A photo? Really! A photo!

Hey! It's the story of a girl

who hasn't washed her hair in 100 years!

- Next! - No, no photo. Kiss.

- Is that Beauty? - No, my grandma.

Of course it's Sleeping Beauty!

Wait till I tell my wife!

If you're already married, sir, it won't work.

Come on.

What do you do?

Do you write?

Yes.

Novels?

Yes... stories, tales.

Writing one now?

I don't like talking about it.

Go on. I'm interested.

Right now it's the story of... 2 fairies who come to Paris

to find a prince charming for Sleeping Beauty.

There's no prince charming, where they're from?

No. They're all out, as a matter of fact.

A shortage...

And then?

It turns out to be very hard.

No wonder! Prince charmings don't grow on trees.

Are you cold?

A little.

I'm never cold, usually.

Here.

Thanks.

- What's this about a wand? - My magic wand

to go back to Fairyland. It's valuable!

I told you. It was in my bag.

Don't blame me.

You shouldn't let your bag lying around. We're in Paris.

What is this place? You're always on the watch out!

- Make a deposition. - Is it long?

I don't know! There's a line.

Stop! Hey! What's wrong with you?

Do you see how they treat us? Like dogs!

Your shoe.

What police officers you are!

Thanks.

Have a nice day.

I'm sorry about earlier.

It was a fetlock sprain, but not too serious.

We'll keep an eye on it.

You must have been scared. But I'm relieved.

Sure, OK.

Bye.

- I'm sorry, I have to go. - Nothing serious?

No. I'm meeting up with my cousin.

See you soon?

- Any plans tomorrow? - Tomorrow?

Tomorrow.

No, tomorrow...

I'm supposed to do something, but I'll call you.

OK.

Here, so you have my number.

No, keep it.

Thanks.

Bring it back tomorrow. So I'll see you.

Bye.

Let's go. Jogging... Éric,

you look like a toad on a matchbox. Sit up. There.

One last round, and dismount.

Everybody dismount.

We'll work on a high trot next week.

All right? As we see with Éric today,

riding is a dangerous sport.

Let's review the basic safety steps. Mouth-to-mouth...

Yes, Michel, mouth-to-mouth. Heart massage, tourniquet.

Here, Michel, you smart alec.

Lie on the ground as if you'd just fainted.

Come on. Let's start with mouth-to-mouth.

Be very precise.

You have to take his pulse

by pressing two fingers on his neck.

Then bend over and breath in regularly.

Michel! How old are you?

- 18. - Fine.

There you are. Let me finish, I'll be right there.

Be careful.

Don't be afraid.

People are surprised to get kicked,

but think about it.

- To him, you're a monster. - I didn't mean to scare him.

- He's still in shock. - I can imagine.

Here.

What if I slept here? He could be feverish again during the night.

You and Pauline have the same locket.

- It's hers. She gave it to me. - Really?

I'm glad you're friends. She's a very neat girl.

Although on certain things... Her marriage, for instance.

You get married, it's for life. Especially if you have children.

When I say that... people say I'm old-fashioned.

Don't stay there. You'll catch an allergy.

Hold on to him.

Yes, doctor. I was waiting to hear from you.

No, he's better. He calmed down.

Yes, yes. I thought about it.

Blondine's waiting for me. I'll leave you two.

Yes. What? No, nothing.

I think I'll sleep here.

It's best.

Wait a second.

What's wrong?

You're crying.

I feel so stupid, nothing's working.

It's awful here. They're all crazy.

Calm down. What happened?

Someone stole my wand.

I went to the police station, they gave me this instead.

What am I supposed to do?

Poor kid.

- And... you couldn't send anybody? - Sure, tons.

- Hundreds. - Hundreds?

You said to.

How would you like it if hundreds of guys kissed you?

It's disgusting!

A first kiss should be unique.

Anyway, it never works out.

Nobody managed to wake her. I'm getting bored of this.

There are more serious things.

Did you notice the number of beggars in the metro?

All those starving?

I'm not here to change the world.

The Crow is sending us text messages.

Do you realize we have one day left?

I want to go home, but I can't.

There are no princes, just morons.

Don't say that. We met a lot of great people.

At least it was a change.

Aren't you tired of the same people?

No. I miss them. And we don't have all these weirdos at home.

If I'm not mistaken, Bluebeard killed his last 7 wives.

What is she doing here?

We can't let her sleep outside. There's a 3rd bed here.

We'll never find that damn prince.

Neither does mine.

I didn't manage to bake my cake.

Absolutely, having sex over 3 times a week

makes you smarter,

thinner, and, gentlemen, is excellent for...

No news from a group of Japanese tourists,

a rugby team, a dozen firefighters,

and 2 clerics, who vanished during the day.

We add to it the disappearance of the Kleber brothers

and the Eiffel Tower's eclipse on Wednesday.

And now, the weather forecast.

Blondine!

- Blondine, wake up! - What?

- We'll end up getting in trouble. - Here we go again!

The candidates aren't back,

the Kleber brothers... - They're frogs now.

I'm not kidding.

Blondine...

I've thought about it,

and I don't think we've searched for Beauty.

- We've done nothing but. - Really for her!

We're not looking for just any prince,

but for the she will like, not us.

How does that help us any?

To know her tastes, we'd have to talk with her, awake:

a prince has to kiss her.

But we used to know her.

Let's remember how she was.

We could guess what kind of prince she'd like.

It's been a while...

She was rather wild.

She was an animal-lover.

Always with her dog, "Stupid."

She slept in her horse's box when something was wrong.

Yes, her horse.

She cried so bad when he died. She wasn't much fun.

- Almost looney. - Great.

Get dressed.

He was under our eyes, our very eyes!

Who?

Guillaume! He's exactly like her.

Handsome, looney, not much fun...

No kids.

Actually... he can have kids.

I kind of liked him so... I lied to you.

You lied to me! But you can't!

You're a fairy!

Hush!

I know that.

I've been a fairy for 500 years and all I can do

is wave my wand and smile idiotically.

What's gotten into you?

What's gotten into me is that I want to have fun, to travel,

to work, to have kids, to belong in the world.

- Don't you? - No.

Are you going to leave us?

Of course not.

Hurry up, we don't have much time.

So?

What do you mean "so"?

So what? We're finished.

The wands don't work anymore, it's a sign.

We're headed for a catastrophe. If she doesn't wake up,

her disappearance will lead to ours.

It's inevitable.

- What's wrong? - We must see Guillaume.

He's asleep. He came in late.

- Guillaume! - What?

This may seem weird, but we have to send you to Fairyland.

What time is it?

Only you can wake Sleeping Beauty.

- Is this a joke? - I see what you mean.

This is an emergency, so we'll see about it later.

What is she doing?

Why isn't it working?

Pauline?

- Go get yours. - It was stolen, I told you.

What do we do?

Message from Titania:

the wands are all broken, we're in for it!

- What? - Without a prince, we'll all die!

What is this?

Beauty has been asleep for 100 years.

That's why everything is breaking down.

Oh, all right! It's much clearer now.

I understand we may seem insane...

- Oh no, not at all. - We may seem so, but we're not.

Do you want the fairies' death on your conscience?

- No. - It's enough a mess as it is.

Half of the world is starving, the other is at war.

Imagine humanity without tales, without stories.

Children need us to grow.

This if for your mental health.

We're headed for a cosmic catastrophe.

Don't you realize?

Let's take the car and rush home.

- We might make it in time. - So,

we take a car and rush on to Fairyland.

There, I wake Sleeping Beauty

and we save humankind. - If you don't mind.

It's kind of you.

No problem. As a neighbor, it's the least I can do.

Except today my schedule is rather full.

How about this weekend?

The deadline is tonight. It'll be too late.

We have to go now... without meaning to rush you.

All right, joke's over.

If you could leave while I get dressed...

Can you send your friends back to Fairyland?

He's so matter-of-fact, you'd never convinced him.

You'll have fun with dad.

All right! What's going on?

I have a problem, I'm leaving her. She has her bag.

Are you crazy? It's 6 a.m.!

Drop her off at school.

I want to go with you to Fairyland.

- Something wrong? - Not at all.

- Hello. - Hello.

Hi, darling.

Take me to Fairyland.

That's enough. It's not for children.

So, if Beauty doesn't wake up...

We're all in for it.

All of us?

Yes... all of us.

How unfair!

That's how it is. If one of us disappears,

the rest of us go down too.

Let's hope they find someone!

It was you, in the staircase!

You repainted it like new.

Well, yes.

And her, for your deposit.

We made a ton, so...

That's what I thought! I still can't believe it.

I'm talking with actual fairies.

Well, yes.

- What are you doing? - We need gas.

- Will it take long? - We have to stop!

I can't believe it!

Going to Fairyland!

They're insane! You hit me over the head.

While I was always there for you.

- You could have killed me. - Not with a trophy.

"Not with a trophy."

Don't you see they're crazy? You believed in their tale!

I was doing my best!

You're worse than I thought.

Seek help. Increase the dosage. Move up to 2 shots.

Calm down.

You two and the uncle, I don't want a word out of you.

One word and I'll call the cops. Off to jail.

Can't he get off our backs! He took our car!

My car! I'm taking it back!

I told you it wouldn't work. It's your fault.

It should have been earlier. She wanted him for herself.

It's wrong! Everything's screwed!

No, it's not screwed. OK...

We can't bring the prince. Let's try the opposite.

How? We don't have a car.

Come on, go, go, go!

My car!

No so bad a day, huh? Going to Fairyland!

Move Beauty! It's the world turned upside down.

We can't move Beauty. That's not how it was written.

The rules are strict. The prince must come here.

Yes, you're right. What matters is obeying the rules.

If we vanish...

Our ancient rules must be followed.

Too ancient.

It's time to change the rules. Our future is at stake.

We wouldn't be here if you had done better.

It's useless. Let us prepare to die with dignity.

- Exactly. - Stop, Melusine.

It's useless. We messed up.

- We must accept it. - No way.

Titania, you sent us to Paris to get a prince.

Is that in the rules?

You set things going, now stick to it.

Why accept to disappear when we still have a chance?

You can still save us. I beg you.

- Would you like to vanish? - No.

- And you? - No.

- And you? - No.

- And you? - No.

Nobody wants to breathe, dance and laugh?

- Yes, sure. - Yes.

- And you, Blondine? - You're right.

Sure, it took us some time to find the prince, but now

he's the right one.

Great, except he didn't come.

Of course. Who would want to come here?

No one believes in us.

Except kids. After they turn 6, it's over.

People laughed at us when we said we were fairies

Really?

Even Pauline, who draws them all day, didn't believe it.

That is, until tonight, no. But now...

You can trust us. We have to bring her there.

Let's say I agreed to move Beauty.

- She still has to be kissed. - I have an idea.

- Now's not the time! - Cellphones?

Going posting, want to come?

Yes, to communicate.

What about using telepathy?

No. You're not going to cut her hair, are you?

She'll break her neck!

It'll never work.

We'll end our lives in an old minivan that reeks of weed.

I'll never see Titania again!

She'll never know how I feel.

She knows. Everyone does.

Stop being so pessimistic.

You'll bring bad luck.

I know, but she dropped the kid off at 6 a.m.

Daddy, come! There's no prince in my book.

One second, dear. I'm on the phone with your uncle.

She said to wait at the club.

Except I have to go. It's almost midnight.

Just dropping her off!

She got roped into something with two lunatics. A cult.

The ideal clients.

With her stories of elves and fairies.

She hit me over the head. I'm worried for her

and the kid. Can you watch her if she isn't back tomorrow?

Okay, but that's all. We have plans for a wine-tasting weekend.

It's not for kids.

Guillaume, I had an accident, just outside. Come quickly.

Ma'am?

She jumped out of nowhere.

I don't know...

Ma'am?

Are you ok?

Yes.

I think so.

Can you get up?

She's awake! Beauty is awake!

I knew it, I knew it.

That was a close call.

We knew he was the right one!

A true prince charming.

Calm down. He's not that great.

What do you mean? Here's a prince.

But there wasn't one before.

Sure, he just appeared by magic.

It's crazy how he looks like your uncle.

Time to go to bed, it's past midnight. Come on, sweetheart.

- You didn't read the end. - It's always the same.

"They lived happily ever after, had many children."

Yes. The end is always the same.

Guillaume and Beauty had many children,

who were handsome, brave, generous, hard-working, altruistic, tender,

non-smokers, faithful, athletic... and intelligent.

Jack and Melusine got married, or became civil partners,

pasted many posters and had many children.

Well, one. It's good enough.

Blondine happily regained Fairyland.

At least, it's not full of weirdos...

except Bluebeard.

So, in that dream, they made you kiss Sleeping Beauty.

Yes. Well, I wasn't the only one.

But I couldn't, so...

Since I'm already married,

the Crow...

didn't let me kiss her.

Right...

We were going to Hollywood!

Yeah... We'd need a princess to kiss us.

Princesses don't grow on trees.

Shit.

Subtitles: Eclair Media