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1
00:00:55,220 --> 00:00:56,915
Onward, Ohauncey!
2
00:00:57,055 --> 00:00:59,649
To the highest room
of the tallest tower...
3
00:00:59,791 --> 00:01:04,888
...where my princess awaits rescue
from her handsome Prince Oharming!
4
00:01:16,241 --> 00:01:20,007
This is worse than " Love Letters" .
I hate dinner theater!
5
00:01:20,145 --> 00:01:21,908
Me, too.
6
00:01:23,248 --> 00:01:25,239
Whoa there, Ohauncey!
7
00:01:26,651 --> 00:01:30,109
Hark! The brave Prince Oharming
approacheth.
8
00:01:30,255 --> 00:01:34,624
Fear not, fair maiden. I shall slay
the monster that guards you...
9
00:01:34,760 --> 00:01:37,695
...then take my place as rightful king.
10
00:01:37,829 --> 00:01:39,421
What did she say?
11
00:01:43,201 --> 00:01:44,600
It's Shrek!
12
00:01:44,870 --> 00:01:46,531
Whoo, Shrek, yeah!
13
00:01:48,774 --> 00:01:50,867
Prepare, foul beast...
14
00:01:51,009 --> 00:01:55,673
...to enter into a world of pain
with which you are not familiar!
15
00:01:55,814 --> 00:01:58,374
Happy birthday to thee
Happy birthday to thee
16
00:01:58,517 --> 00:01:59,779
Do you mind?
17
00:02:00,118 --> 00:02:03,281
Do you mind? Boring!
18
00:02:07,793 --> 00:02:10,125
Prepare, foul beast...
19
00:02:19,137 --> 00:02:21,833
Someday you'll be sorry.
20
00:02:21,973 --> 00:02:24,134
We already are!
21
00:02:49,267 --> 00:02:50,564
Mommy...
22
00:02:54,506 --> 00:02:57,998
You're right. I can't let this happen.
23
00:02:58,844 --> 00:03:00,175
I can't !
24
00:03:01,346 --> 00:03:05,112
I am the rightful King of Far Far Away.
25
00:03:05,250 --> 00:03:07,343
And I promise you this, Mother...
26
00:03:07,686 --> 00:03:10,416
...I will restore dignity to my throne.
27
00:03:15,026 --> 00:03:16,118
And this time,
28
00:03:16,261 --> 00:03:20,425
no one will stand in my way.
29
00:03:37,382 --> 00:03:39,043
Good morning.
30
00:03:40,051 --> 00:03:41,712
Good morning.
31
00:03:43,388 --> 00:03:44,412
Morning breath.
32
00:03:44,556 --> 00:03:47,719
I know. Isn't it wonderful?
33
00:03:48,393 --> 00:03:50,224
Good morning, good morning
34
00:03:50,896 --> 00:03:53,296
The sun is shining through
35
00:03:53,431 --> 00:03:55,626
Good morning, good morning
To you
36
00:03:55,767 --> 00:03:57,894
And you!
And you!
37
00:04:01,806 --> 00:04:03,501
They grow up so fast.
38
00:04:03,642 --> 00:04:05,735
Not fast enough.
39
00:04:07,812 --> 00:04:10,508
You'll be filling in
for the King and Queen.
40
00:04:10,649 --> 00:04:13,846
Several functions
require your attendance, sir.
41
00:04:13,985 --> 00:04:17,284
Great! Let's get started.
42
00:04:17,422 --> 00:04:20,255
Oome on, lazybones. Time to get moving!
43
00:04:21,092 --> 00:04:23,356
You need to get a pair ofjammies.
44
00:04:30,802 --> 00:04:34,033
I got some sleep and I needed it
45
00:04:34,172 --> 00:04:36,902
Not a lot, just a little bit
46
00:04:37,042 --> 00:04:40,136
Someone's always
trying to keep me from it
47
00:04:40,278 --> 00:04:43,111
It's a crying shame
48
00:04:43,782 --> 00:04:46,148
It's a royal pain in the neck
49
00:04:46,284 --> 00:04:47,945
I knight thee.
50
00:05:09,808 --> 00:05:12,936
If you're filling in for a king,
you should look like one.
51
00:05:13,078 --> 00:05:16,138
Oan somebody come in
and work on Shrek?
52
00:05:17,983 --> 00:05:19,473
I will see what I can do.
53
00:05:40,672 --> 00:05:42,333
Yeah, wow.
54
00:05:43,174 --> 00:05:45,665
Is this really necessary?
55
00:05:46,444 --> 00:05:48,105
Quite necessary, Fiona.
56
00:05:48,246 --> 00:05:51,044
- I'm Shrek, you twit.
- Whatever.
57
00:05:51,182 --> 00:05:54,879
This isn't a rehearsal, peoples.
Let's see some hustle!
58
00:05:55,020 --> 00:05:56,954
Smiles, everyone! Smiles!
59
00:05:57,088 --> 00:06:00,546
I don't know how much longer
I can keep this up.
60
00:06:00,692 --> 00:06:03,627
I'm sorry, but can you
just try to grin and bear it?
61
00:06:03,762 --> 00:06:05,787
It's just until Dad gets better.
62
00:06:07,866 --> 00:06:09,197
Shrek?
63
00:06:10,535 --> 00:06:12,127
You look handsome.
64
00:06:12,270 --> 00:06:14,204
Oome here, you.
65
00:06:28,553 --> 00:06:33,217
My butt is itching up a storm and
I can't reach it in this monkey suit.
66
00:06:34,059 --> 00:06:36,994
Hey, you! Oome here. What's your name?
67
00:06:37,128 --> 00:06:39,494
Fiddlesworth, sir.
68
00:06:39,631 --> 00:06:40,723
Perfect.
69
00:06:43,401 --> 00:06:45,767
Ladies and gentlemen...
70
00:06:45,904 --> 00:06:49,067
...Princess Fiona and Sir Shrek!
71
00:06:53,411 --> 00:06:55,174
Ahh! You've got it.
72
00:06:55,313 --> 00:06:56,837
A little to the left.
73
00:06:58,083 --> 00:07:00,278
That's it! That's good.
74
00:07:00,418 --> 00:07:03,512
Oh, yeah! Scratch
that thing! You're on it.
75
00:07:03,655 --> 00:07:05,088
Shrek!
76
00:07:09,994 --> 00:07:11,120
My eye!
77
00:07:11,262 --> 00:07:12,422
What are you doing?
78
00:07:19,003 --> 00:07:19,992
Fiona!
79
00:07:23,108 --> 00:07:26,339
- Are you okay?
- Yeah. I'm fine.
80
00:07:29,948 --> 00:07:32,280
Shrimp! My favorite!
81
00:07:42,794 --> 00:07:45,490
- That's it! We're leaving!
- Oalm down.
82
00:07:45,630 --> 00:07:50,567
Oalm down? Who do you think
we're kidding? I am an ogre.
83
00:07:50,702 --> 00:07:54,297
I'm not cut out for this, Fiona,
and I never will be.
84
00:07:58,376 --> 00:07:59,741
I think that went well.
85
00:07:59,878 --> 00:08:01,106
Donkey!
86
00:08:01,246 --> 00:08:02,975
Oome on, Shrek!
87
00:08:03,481 --> 00:08:06,712
Some people just don't
understand boundaries.
88
00:08:15,994 --> 00:08:20,590
Just think. A couple more days
and we'll be back home...
89
00:08:20,732 --> 00:08:24,031
...in our vermin-filled shack
strewn with fungus...
90
00:08:24,169 --> 00:08:27,070
...and filled with the stench
of mud and neglect.
91
00:08:27,205 --> 00:08:29,833
You had me at "vermin-filled" .
92
00:08:30,675 --> 00:08:35,510
And, um... maybe even the pitter-patter
of little feet on the floor.
93
00:08:36,014 --> 00:08:38,710
That's right, the swamp rats
will be spawning.
94
00:08:38,850 --> 00:08:40,215
Uh, no.
95
00:08:40,351 --> 00:08:44,048
What I'm thinking of is a little bigger
than a swamp rat.
96
00:08:44,189 --> 00:08:45,213
Donkey?
97
00:08:45,356 --> 00:08:49,019
No, Shrek. What if, theoretically...
98
00:08:50,295 --> 00:08:52,422
...they were little ogre feet?
99
00:08:58,870 --> 00:09:02,237
Honey, let's be rational about this.
100
00:09:02,373 --> 00:09:04,739
Have you seen a baby lately?
101
00:09:04,876 --> 00:09:08,073
They just eat and poop, and they cry...
102
00:09:08,213 --> 00:09:11,580
...then they cry when they poop
and poop when they cry.
103
00:09:11,716 --> 00:09:14,514
Now, imagine an ogre baby.
104
00:09:14,652 --> 00:09:18,452
They extra-cry and they extra-poop.
105
00:09:18,590 --> 00:09:22,185
Shrek, don't you ever think
about having a family?
106
00:09:22,327 --> 00:09:25,888
Right now, you're my family.
107
00:09:29,901 --> 00:09:32,062
Somebody better be dying.
108
00:09:34,005 --> 00:09:36,235
I'm dying.
109
00:09:38,576 --> 00:09:39,736
Harold?
110
00:09:41,913 --> 00:09:45,007
Don't forget
to pay the gardener, Lillian.
111
00:09:45,149 --> 00:09:47,083
Of course, darling.
112
00:09:48,820 --> 00:09:49,878
Fiona.
113
00:09:50,021 --> 00:09:51,545
Yes, Daddy?
114
00:09:51,689 --> 00:09:54,419
I know I made many mistakes with you.
115
00:09:55,426 --> 00:09:56,893
It's okay.
116
00:09:57,028 --> 00:09:59,155
But your love for Shrek has...
117
00:10:00,098 --> 00:10:01,497
...taught me much.
118
00:10:03,635 --> 00:10:05,626
My dear boy...
119
00:10:05,770 --> 00:10:09,035
...I am proud to call you my son.
120
00:10:09,173 --> 00:10:12,301
And I'm proud to call you my frog...
121
00:10:12,443 --> 00:10:14,877
...King dad-in-law.
122
00:10:15,013 --> 00:10:20,610
Now there is a matter
of business to attend to.
123
00:10:30,962 --> 00:10:33,954
The Frog King... is dead.
124
00:10:42,140 --> 00:10:44,108
Put your hat back on, fool.
125
00:10:44,242 --> 00:10:45,834
Shrek...
126
00:10:45,977 --> 00:10:47,638
...please come hither.
127
00:10:51,482 --> 00:10:52,847
Yeah, Dad?
128
00:10:52,984 --> 00:10:56,147
This kingdom needs a new king.
129
00:10:57,488 --> 00:11:02,152
You and Fiona
are next in line for the throne.
130
00:11:03,828 --> 00:11:08,026
Next in line. You see, Dad,
that's why people love you.
131
00:11:08,166 --> 00:11:11,499
Even on your deathbed,
you're still making jokes.
132
00:11:15,173 --> 00:11:18,870
Oome on, Dad. An ogre as king?
133
00:11:19,010 --> 00:11:21,535
That's not such a good idea.
134
00:11:21,679 --> 00:11:24,978
There must be somebody else. Anybody!
135
00:11:25,116 --> 00:11:30,315
Aside from you, there is
only one remaining heir.
136
00:11:30,455 --> 00:11:33,652
Really? Who is he, Dad?
137
00:11:33,791 --> 00:11:35,850
His name is...
138
00:11:37,228 --> 00:11:38,286
...is...
139
00:11:38,429 --> 00:11:40,056
What's his name?
140
00:11:40,198 --> 00:11:41,790
...is...
141
00:11:43,701 --> 00:11:44,793
Daddy!
142
00:12:02,053 --> 00:12:04,021
His name is Arthur.
143
00:12:04,155 --> 00:12:05,554
Arthur?
144
00:12:09,894 --> 00:12:13,091
I know you'll do...
145
00:12:13,231 --> 00:12:15,893
...what's right.
146
00:12:18,936 --> 00:12:20,267
Harold?
147
00:12:20,405 --> 00:12:21,963
Dad? Dad!
148
00:12:23,408 --> 00:12:24,636
Dad?
149
00:12:25,243 --> 00:12:26,835
Do your thing, man.
150
00:12:56,774 --> 00:13:00,642
When you were young and your heart
151
00:13:00,778 --> 00:13:02,939
Was an open book
152
00:13:04,949 --> 00:13:09,079
y ou used to say live and let live
153
00:13:09,220 --> 00:13:12,553
y ou know you did, you know you did
y ou know you did
154
00:13:13,357 --> 00:13:18,420
But if this ever changing world
In which we live in
155
00:13:19,297 --> 00:13:23,461
Makes you give in and cry
156
00:13:25,970 --> 00:13:28,131
Say live and let die
157
00:13:31,576 --> 00:13:33,237
Live and let die
158
00:14:09,747 --> 00:14:13,513
Hey, lady
y ou, lady
159
00:14:14,519 --> 00:14:16,680
Cursing at your life
160
00:14:17,355 --> 00:14:20,017
y ou're a discontented mother
161
00:14:21,692 --> 00:14:24,354
And a regimented wife
162
00:14:50,054 --> 00:14:53,217
What does a prince
have to do to get a drink here?
163
00:14:54,559 --> 00:14:56,254
Ah, Mabel!
164
00:14:56,394 --> 00:15:00,797
Why they call you an ugly stepsister,
I'll never know.
165
00:15:01,899 --> 00:15:04,993
Where's Doris? Taking the night off?
166
00:15:05,136 --> 00:15:08,902
She's not welcome here,
and neither are you.
167
00:15:10,575 --> 00:15:12,600
What do you want, Oharming?
168
00:15:12,743 --> 00:15:16,804
Not much. Just a chance at redemption.
169
00:15:18,416 --> 00:15:19,883
And a Fuzzy Navel.
170
00:15:20,017 --> 00:15:23,077
And Fuzzy Navels for all my friends!
171
00:15:27,525 --> 00:15:29,152
We're not your friends.
172
00:15:31,362 --> 00:15:33,489
You don't belong here.
173
00:15:33,631 --> 00:15:37,795
You're absolutely right,
but, I mean, do any of us?
174
00:15:37,935 --> 00:15:39,562
Do a number on his face.
175
00:15:39,704 --> 00:15:44,300
Wait, wait, wait!
We are more alike than you think.
176
00:15:44,442 --> 00:15:48,344
Wicked Witch! The Seven Dwarfs
saved Snow White, and what happened?
177
00:15:48,479 --> 00:15:49,571
Oh, what's it to you?
178
00:15:49,714 --> 00:15:51,978
They left you the unfairest of them all.
179
00:15:52,116 --> 00:15:56,644
Now here you are,
hustling pool to get your next meal.
180
00:15:56,787 --> 00:15:58,618
How does that feel?
181
00:16:04,095 --> 00:16:05,687
Pretty unfair.
182
00:16:05,830 --> 00:16:07,229
And you!
183
00:16:07,365 --> 00:16:11,995
Your star puppet abandons the show
to go and find his father.
184
00:16:13,504 --> 00:16:15,597
I hate that little wooden puppet.
185
00:16:15,740 --> 00:16:17,708
And Hook.
186
00:16:17,842 --> 00:16:19,434
Need I say more?
187
00:16:23,147 --> 00:16:25,911
- And you, Frumpypigskin!
- Rumpelstiltskin.
188
00:16:26,050 --> 00:16:28,678
Where's that firstborn
you were promised?
189
00:16:31,088 --> 00:16:34,990
Mabel. Remember how you
couldn't get your little fat foot...
190
00:16:35,126 --> 00:16:37,026
...into that tiny glass slipper?
191
00:16:39,697 --> 00:16:43,224
Oinderella is
in Far Far Away right now...
192
00:16:43,367 --> 00:16:48,395
...eating bonbons, cavorting with
every last fairy tale creature...
193
00:16:48,539 --> 00:16:51,007
...that has ever done you wrong!
194
00:16:51,142 --> 00:16:56,079
Once upon a time, someone decided
that we were the losers.
195
00:16:56,213 --> 00:16:59,080
But there are
two sides to every story...
196
00:16:59,250 --> 00:17:01,775
...and our side has not been told!
197
00:17:01,919 --> 00:17:06,788
So who will join me? Who wants
to come out on top for once?
198
00:17:06,924 --> 00:17:08,585
Who wants their...
199
00:17:08,726 --> 00:17:11,889
..." happily ever after" ?
200
00:17:29,080 --> 00:17:30,741
This way, gents.
201
00:17:42,093 --> 00:17:47,121
It's out of my hands, senorita. The
winds of fate have blown on my destiny.
202
00:17:47,264 --> 00:17:51,064
But I will never forget you.
You are the love of my life.
203
00:17:51,202 --> 00:17:53,636
As are you.
204
00:17:53,771 --> 00:17:56,137
And, uh, you.
205
00:17:56,273 --> 00:17:59,436
I don't know you, but I'd like to.
206
00:18:00,611 --> 00:18:01,942
I got to go!
207
00:18:03,347 --> 00:18:05,042
I don't wanna leave you either.
208
00:18:05,182 --> 00:18:08,015
But you know how Shrek is.
The dude's lost without me.
209
00:18:08,953 --> 00:18:12,286
But don't worry. I'll send you
airmail kisses every day!
210
00:18:13,624 --> 00:18:14,989
Be strong, babies.
211
00:18:15,126 --> 00:18:17,560
Ooco, Peanut, listen to your mama.
212
00:18:17,695 --> 00:18:21,688
Bananas, no roasting marshmallows
on your sister's head.
213
00:18:23,701 --> 00:18:25,328
That's my special boy!
214
00:18:25,469 --> 00:18:28,563
Oome here, all of you!
Give your daddy a big hug!
215
00:18:35,146 --> 00:18:36,477
Shrek?
216
00:18:37,481 --> 00:18:41,781
Maybe you should just stay and be King.
217
00:18:41,919 --> 00:18:45,446
Oome on. There's no way
I could run a kingdom.
218
00:18:45,589 --> 00:18:48,581
That's why your cousin Arthur
is a perfect choice.
219
00:18:48,726 --> 00:18:51,251
It's not that. You see...
220
00:18:51,395 --> 00:18:55,855
And if he gives me trouble,
I always have persuasion and reason.
221
00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:59,333
Here's persuasion... and here's reason.
222
00:19:01,739 --> 00:19:03,138
Fiona...
223
00:19:03,274 --> 00:19:06,539
...soon it's just going to be you, me...
224
00:19:06,677 --> 00:19:08,338
...and our swamp.
225
00:19:10,181 --> 00:19:12,672
It's not going to be just you and me.
226
00:19:13,951 --> 00:19:15,851
All aboard!
227
00:19:17,021 --> 00:19:19,854
It will be. I promise.
228
00:19:21,025 --> 00:19:22,515
I love you.
229
00:19:29,133 --> 00:19:30,794
That's lovely.
230
00:19:30,935 --> 00:19:32,527
Bye-bye, babies!
231
00:19:40,110 --> 00:19:41,304
Shrek!
232
00:19:42,546 --> 00:19:44,741
- Wait!
- What is it?
233
00:19:44,882 --> 00:19:46,372
I'm ... I'm ...
234
00:19:50,387 --> 00:19:52,252
I love you, too, honey!
235
00:19:52,389 --> 00:19:55,222
No! I said I'm ...
236
00:19:58,229 --> 00:19:59,662
You're what?
237
00:19:59,797 --> 00:20:02,231
I said I'm pregnant!
238
00:20:06,403 --> 00:20:07,870
What was that?
239
00:20:08,005 --> 00:20:11,065
You're going to be a father!
240
00:20:12,910 --> 00:20:14,707
That's great!
241
00:20:14,845 --> 00:20:18,110
Really? I'm glad you think so!
242
00:20:18,249 --> 00:20:19,648
I love you!
243
00:20:19,783 --> 00:20:21,774
Yeah!
244
00:20:21,919 --> 00:20:24,251
Me, too! You!
245
00:20:28,125 --> 00:20:31,617
I'm going to be an uncle!
I'm going to be an uncle!
246
00:20:31,762 --> 00:20:34,822
And you, my friend, are royally...
247
00:21:13,537 --> 00:21:14,526
Home.
248
00:21:26,817 --> 00:21:28,148
Shrek!
249
00:21:30,487 --> 00:21:31,818
Fiona!
250
00:21:35,826 --> 00:21:37,157
Fiona?
251
00:21:56,380 --> 00:21:57,779
Oh, no.
252
00:22:00,951 --> 00:22:03,852
Better out than in, I always say.
253
00:22:13,530 --> 00:22:14,861
No, no, no!
254
00:22:17,034 --> 00:22:19,594
It's okay. It's gonna be all right.
255
00:22:24,875 --> 00:22:27,036
Stop! Hey, wait!
256
00:23:16,427 --> 00:23:17,951
Donkey. Donkey!
257
00:23:18,095 --> 00:23:19,323
Wake up!
258
00:23:21,765 --> 00:23:23,096
Dada!
259
00:23:25,536 --> 00:23:27,527
Shrek! Are you okay?
260
00:23:29,273 --> 00:23:34,802
I can't believe I'm going to be
a father. How did this happen?
261
00:23:34,945 --> 00:23:39,143
Allow me to explain. When a man
has feelings for a woman...
262
00:23:39,283 --> 00:23:41,808
...a powerful urge sweeps over him.
263
00:23:41,952 --> 00:23:44,443
I know how it happened.
264
00:23:45,289 --> 00:23:47,348
I just can't believe it.
265
00:23:50,127 --> 00:23:51,958
How does it happen?
266
00:23:58,969 --> 00:24:04,236
And the cat's in the cradle
and the silver spoon
267
00:24:04,374 --> 00:24:07,002
Little Boy Blue and the Man in the Moon
268
00:24:07,144 --> 00:24:09,738
When you coming home, son?
I don't know when
269
00:24:09,880 --> 00:24:12,178
But we'll get together then, Dad.
270
00:24:12,316 --> 00:24:14,307
Donkey! Oan you just cut to the part
271
00:24:14,451 --> 00:24:16,976
where you're supposed
to make me feel better?
272
00:24:17,721 --> 00:24:20,246
You know I love Fiona, boss. Right?
273
00:24:20,390 --> 00:24:24,451
What I am talking about
is you, me, my cousin's boat...
274
00:24:24,595 --> 00:24:30,192
...an ice cold pitcher of mojitos
and two weeks of nothing but fishing.
275
00:24:30,334 --> 00:24:32,199
Don't listen to him!
276
00:24:32,336 --> 00:24:35,032
Having a baby
isn't going to ruin your life.
277
00:24:35,172 --> 00:24:39,700
It's not my life I'm worried
about ruining, it's the kid's .
278
00:24:39,843 --> 00:24:44,143
When have you ever heard the phrase
"as sweet as an ogre" ...
279
00:24:44,281 --> 00:24:46,715
...or " as nurturing as an ogre" ...
280
00:24:46,850 --> 00:24:51,219
...or "You'll love
my dad. He's a real ogre."
281
00:24:51,355 --> 00:24:53,118
Okay. I get it.
282
00:24:53,257 --> 00:24:56,715
It's not going to be easy.
But you got us to help you.
283
00:24:56,860 --> 00:24:58,555
That's true.
284
00:24:58,695 --> 00:25:00,162
I'm doomed.
285
00:25:00,297 --> 00:25:01,958
You'll be fine.
286
00:25:02,866 --> 00:25:04,766
You're finished.
287
00:25:07,037 --> 00:25:09,699
Uh, with yourjourney.
288
00:25:17,881 --> 00:25:22,318
"Wor-ces-ters-shiree" ?
Now that sounds fancy!
289
00:25:22,452 --> 00:25:23,783
It's Worcestershire.
290
00:25:23,921 --> 00:25:25,752
Like the sauce?
291
00:25:25,889 --> 00:25:27,220
It's spicy!
292
00:25:31,061 --> 00:25:32,892
They must be expecting us.
293
00:25:38,802 --> 00:25:41,600
What in the shista-shire
kind of place is this?
294
00:25:41,738 --> 00:25:46,937
Well, my stomach aches and my palms
just got sweaty. Must be a high school.
295
00:25:47,077 --> 00:25:48,237
High school?
296
00:25:48,378 --> 00:25:49,936
Ready? Okay!
297
00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:52,514
Wherefore art thou headed, to the top?
298
00:25:52,649 --> 00:25:56,608
Yeah, we think so, we think so! And
dost thou thinkest thine can be stopped?
299
00:25:56,753 --> 00:25:59,221
Nay, we thinkst not, we thinkst not!
300
00:26:04,494 --> 00:26:08,487
All right, Mr. Percival,
ease up on the reins.
301
00:26:11,835 --> 00:26:15,532
For lo, bro, don't burn
all my frankincense and myrrh.
302
00:26:15,672 --> 00:26:19,164
I'm feeling nauseous from memories
of wedgies and swirlies!
303
00:26:19,309 --> 00:26:23,973
How did you receive wedgies when you are
clearly not the wearer of underpants?
304
00:26:24,114 --> 00:26:27,015
Let's just say some things
are better left unsaid.
305
00:26:27,150 --> 00:26:31,211
So I was all like, " I'd rather get
the black plague than go out with you."
306
00:26:31,355 --> 00:26:33,687
- Oh, totally.
- Pardon me.
307
00:26:33,824 --> 00:26:36,622
- Totally ew-eth.
- Yeah, totally.
308
00:26:38,228 --> 00:26:40,822
I just altered my character level
to +3 superb-ability.
309
00:26:40,964 --> 00:26:43,524
Hi. We're looking for someone named...
310
00:26:43,667 --> 00:26:48,195
Who rolled a +9 dork spell and
summoned the beast and his quadruped?
311
00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:54,534
I know you're busy not fitting in, but
can you tell me where I can find Arthur?
312
00:26:54,678 --> 00:26:55,975
He's over there.
313
00:27:16,166 --> 00:27:20,569
There is no sweeter taste
on thy tongue than victory!
314
00:27:23,006 --> 00:27:25,873
Strong, handsome, face of a leader.
315
00:27:26,009 --> 00:27:29,342
Does Arthur look like a king or what?
316
00:27:30,514 --> 00:27:31,845
Sorry.
317
00:27:32,582 --> 00:27:35,210
Did you say you were looking for Arthur?
318
00:27:35,352 --> 00:27:37,786
That information is
on a need-to-know basis.
319
00:27:37,921 --> 00:27:39,616
It's top secret!
320
00:27:39,756 --> 00:27:43,351
Now, gentlemen, let's away.
To the showers!
321
00:27:45,862 --> 00:27:47,489
Greetings, Your Majesty.
322
00:27:47,631 --> 00:27:49,189
This is your lucky day.
323
00:27:50,033 --> 00:27:52,126
What are you supposed to be?
324
00:27:52,269 --> 00:27:55,534
Some kind of giant mutant leprechaun
or something?
325
00:27:56,540 --> 00:28:00,032
Giant mutant... You made a funny.
326
00:28:00,544 --> 00:28:02,478
Unhand me, monster!
327
00:28:02,612 --> 00:28:04,580
Stop squirming, Arthur.
328
00:28:04,715 --> 00:28:07,047
I'm not Arthur.
329
00:28:09,052 --> 00:28:11,577
I am Lancelot.
330
00:28:11,722 --> 00:28:14,384
That dork over there is Arthur.
331
00:28:20,464 --> 00:28:22,659
This is, like, totally embarrassing...
332
00:28:22,799 --> 00:28:25,393
...but Tiffany thinkest
thou vex her so soothly.
333
00:28:25,535 --> 00:28:28,936
She thought perchance thou would
ask her to the Homecoming Dance.
334
00:28:29,072 --> 00:28:30,164
Excuse me?
335
00:28:30,307 --> 00:28:34,243
Like, whatever. She's into college guys
and mythical creatures.
336
00:28:37,681 --> 00:28:39,774
Oh, Arthur...
337
00:28:39,916 --> 00:28:43,613
...come out, come out, wherever you are!
338
00:28:45,655 --> 00:28:48,283
You better run,
you little punk no-goodniks!
339
00:28:48,425 --> 00:28:51,826
The days of Donkey Dumpy Drawers
are over!
340
00:28:57,934 --> 00:28:59,265
Hold it.
341
00:28:59,936 --> 00:29:01,995
We're here for the mascot contest.
342
00:29:06,676 --> 00:29:09,873
We're here for the mascot contest, too.
343
00:29:10,013 --> 00:29:12,538
This is a costume?
344
00:29:12,682 --> 00:29:14,673
Worked on it all night long.
345
00:29:16,019 --> 00:29:17,816
Looks pretty real to me.
346
00:29:17,954 --> 00:29:20,354
If he were real, could I do this?
347
00:29:22,025 --> 00:29:23,686
Or this?
348
00:29:24,961 --> 00:29:29,830
If it were real, that would have been
agonizingly painful.
349
00:29:29,966 --> 00:29:33,163
- Now watch this!
- That's quite enough, boys.
350
00:29:33,303 --> 00:29:37,103
Thank you to Professor Primbottom
and his lecture...
351
00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:38,639
...on "just say nay" .
352
00:29:39,576 --> 00:29:43,842
And now, without further ado, let's give
a warm Worcestershire hoozah...
353
00:29:43,980 --> 00:29:47,472
...to the winner
of our mascot contest, the...
354
00:29:48,652 --> 00:29:49,641
...ogre?
355
00:29:51,721 --> 00:29:54,019
That's right. I'm the new mascot.
356
00:29:54,157 --> 00:29:57,786
So let's really try and beat
the other guys at...
357
00:29:57,928 --> 00:30:01,056
...whatever it is they're doing!
358
00:30:04,601 --> 00:30:07,593
This is all a bit unorthodox...
359
00:30:07,737 --> 00:30:11,400
Where can I find Arthur Pendragon?
360
00:30:13,677 --> 00:30:15,167
Hey, wait...
361
00:30:19,282 --> 00:30:20,909
Olassic.
362
00:30:21,051 --> 00:30:22,746
You should be ashamed of yourself!
363
00:30:22,886 --> 00:30:25,286
I didn't do it. They did.
364
00:30:30,093 --> 00:30:31,822
Please don't eat me.
365
00:30:31,962 --> 00:30:34,294
Eat him! Eat him! Eat him!
366
00:30:35,298 --> 00:30:37,960
I'm not here to eat him!
367
00:30:39,436 --> 00:30:42,064
Time to pack up
your toothbrush and jammies.
368
00:30:42,205 --> 00:30:44,435
You're the new King of Far Far Away.
369
00:30:44,574 --> 00:30:46,235
What?
370
00:30:47,777 --> 00:30:51,975
Artie a king?
More like the Mayor of Loserville!
371
00:30:56,720 --> 00:30:57,709
Burn.
372
00:31:01,324 --> 00:31:02,450
Is this for real?
373
00:31:02,592 --> 00:31:06,995
Absolutely. Olean out your locker, kid.
You have a kingdom to run.
374
00:31:07,130 --> 00:31:09,792
So, wait...l'm really the only heir?
375
00:31:11,134 --> 00:31:12,465
The one and only.
376
00:31:13,803 --> 00:31:15,464
Give me a second.
377
00:31:17,807 --> 00:31:19,468
My good people...
378
00:31:19,609 --> 00:31:22,339
...there's a lesson here for all of us.
379
00:31:22,479 --> 00:31:26,779
Next time you're about to dunk a kid's
head in a chamber pot, stop and think,
380
00:31:26,917 --> 00:31:29,408
" Hey, maybe this guy has feelings.
381
00:31:30,153 --> 00:31:32,519
Maybe I should cut him some slack.
382
00:31:32,656 --> 00:31:36,023
Cause maybe... just maybe...
383
00:31:36,159 --> 00:31:39,856
...this guy's gonna turn out to be,
I don't know, a king?
384
00:31:39,996 --> 00:31:45,024
Maybe his first royal decree will be to
banish everyone who ever picked on him."
385
00:31:45,168 --> 00:31:48,035
I'm looking at you, jousting team!
386
00:31:48,371 --> 00:31:51,568
And Guin? Oh, Guin.
387
00:31:52,442 --> 00:31:53,773
I've always loved you.
388
00:31:55,645 --> 00:31:58,205
Good friends, it breaks my heart, but...
389
00:31:58,348 --> 00:32:01,840
...enjoy your stay here in prison
while I rule the free world!
390
00:32:01,985 --> 00:32:03,577
Okay, let's not overdo it.
391
00:32:03,720 --> 00:32:07,053
I'm building my city, people...
on rock 'n ' roll!
392
00:32:07,190 --> 00:32:09,055
You just overdid it.
393
00:32:18,201 --> 00:32:19,828
Look at you!
394
00:32:19,970 --> 00:32:21,494
You look darling.
395
00:32:21,638 --> 00:32:23,833
Just precious. Look at her.
396
00:32:23,974 --> 00:32:26,340
Any cravings since you got pregnant?
397
00:32:26,476 --> 00:32:29,104
No. Not at all.
398
00:32:29,946 --> 00:32:31,675
Do you smell ham?
399
00:32:31,815 --> 00:32:34,943
It's present time!
400
00:32:36,820 --> 00:32:40,881
Fiona, please open mine first.
It's the one in front.
401
00:32:41,024 --> 00:32:45,654
" Oongratulations on your new
mess mak..." Oh, mess maker!
402
00:32:45,795 --> 00:32:48,787
" Hopefully this helps.
Love, Oinderella."
403
00:32:50,133 --> 00:32:51,794
- Look at that!
- What is it?
404
00:32:53,370 --> 00:32:55,838
It's for the poopies.
405
00:32:55,972 --> 00:32:57,530
Wait... babies poop?
406
00:32:57,674 --> 00:32:59,005
Everyone poops, Beauty.
407
00:32:59,142 --> 00:33:00,609
Fiona!
408
00:33:00,744 --> 00:33:03,577
We all chipped in
for a little present, too.
409
00:33:04,481 --> 00:33:06,039
Ta-da!
410
00:33:07,250 --> 00:33:10,083
You know the baby will love it,
because I do!
411
00:33:10,220 --> 00:33:13,189
Guys, that's so sweet. Thank you.
412
00:33:13,323 --> 00:33:14,722
Who's this one from?
413
00:33:14,858 --> 00:33:17,793
I got you the biggest one,
because I love you most.
414
00:33:17,927 --> 00:33:20,987
" Have one on me. Love, Snow White."
415
00:33:23,833 --> 00:33:25,460
What is it?
416
00:33:25,602 --> 00:33:27,126
He's a live-in babysitter.
417
00:33:27,270 --> 00:33:28,362
Where's the baby?
418
00:33:28,505 --> 00:33:32,566
You're too kind, Snow,
but I can't accept this.
419
00:33:32,709 --> 00:33:35,075
It's nothing. I have six more at home.
420
00:33:35,211 --> 00:33:36,974
- What does he do?
- Oleaning.
421
00:33:37,113 --> 00:33:38,705
- Feeding.
- Burping.
422
00:33:38,848 --> 00:33:41,316
So, what are
Shrek and I supposed to do?
423
00:33:41,451 --> 00:33:43,578
Work on your marriage.
424
00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:47,588
Thanks, Rapunzel.
What's that supposed to mean?
425
00:33:47,724 --> 00:33:51,751
Oome on now, Fiona.
You know what happens.
426
00:33:52,696 --> 00:33:54,721
You're tired all the time.
427
00:33:54,864 --> 00:33:56,593
You start letting yourself go.
428
00:33:56,733 --> 00:33:57,893
Stretch marks.
429
00:33:58,034 --> 00:33:59,365
Say goodbye to romance.
430
00:34:01,705 --> 00:34:05,141
I'm sorry, but how many
of you have kids?
431
00:34:05,275 --> 00:34:06,833
She's right!
432
00:34:06,976 --> 00:34:11,413
A baby will only strengthen the love
Shrek and Fiona have.
433
00:34:11,548 --> 00:34:14,381
How did Shrek react when you told him?
434
00:34:15,552 --> 00:34:18,715
When he first found out, Shrek said...
435
00:34:31,568 --> 00:34:35,902
Onward, my new friends!
To our happily ever afters!
436
00:34:41,578 --> 00:34:43,739
Now... bombs away!
437
00:35:00,263 --> 00:35:03,130
Well, well, well. If it isn't Peter Pan.
438
00:35:03,266 --> 00:35:05,734
- His name's not Peter.
- Shut it, Wendy.
439
00:35:24,287 --> 00:35:27,950
Enough pillaging! To the castle!
440
00:35:46,309 --> 00:35:47,776
You go! Take care of the baby!
441
00:35:47,911 --> 00:35:51,074
Everybody stay calm! We're going to die!
442
00:35:55,485 --> 00:35:57,612
Everyone in! Now!
443
00:35:57,754 --> 00:35:59,881
Oome on! Put some back into it!
444
00:36:03,226 --> 00:36:04,716
We don't have time. Now go!
445
00:36:04,861 --> 00:36:06,658
Quickly, ladies!
446
00:36:08,932 --> 00:36:10,490
We'll hold them off as long as we can!
447
00:36:26,182 --> 00:36:28,582
Where are Shrek and Fiona?
448
00:36:28,718 --> 00:36:30,879
The name doesn't ring a bell.
449
00:36:31,020 --> 00:36:32,715
No bell.
450
00:36:32,856 --> 00:36:36,223
I suggest you freaks cooperate...
451
00:36:36,359 --> 00:36:38,953
...with the new King of Far Far Away!
452
00:36:39,095 --> 00:36:42,792
The only thing you're ever gonna
be king of is King of the Stupids!
453
00:36:42,932 --> 00:36:45,230
- Hook!
- Right!
454
00:36:45,368 --> 00:36:47,598
Avast, ye cookie.
455
00:36:50,206 --> 00:36:51,867
Start talking.
456
00:36:56,246 --> 00:36:57,736
- Gingy!
- Papa!
457
00:36:57,881 --> 00:36:59,246
Settle down now.
458
00:37:13,229 --> 00:37:16,528
On the good ship Lollipop
459
00:37:16,666 --> 00:37:20,102
It's a sweet trip to the candy shop
460
00:37:20,236 --> 00:37:21,225
You!
461
00:37:22,071 --> 00:37:24,266
You can't lie.
462
00:37:24,407 --> 00:37:28,070
So tell me, puppet... where is Shrek?
463
00:37:31,080 --> 00:37:34,311
Well... I don't know where he's not.
464
00:37:34,450 --> 00:37:36,645
You don't know where Shrek is?
465
00:37:36,786 --> 00:37:39,380
It wouldn't be inaccurate to assume...
466
00:37:39,522 --> 00:37:43,788
...that I couldn't exactly not say that
is or isn't almost partially incorrect.
467
00:37:43,927 --> 00:37:45,292
So you do know where he is!
468
00:37:45,428 --> 00:37:47,953
On the contrary,
I'm possibly more or less
469
00:37:48,097 --> 00:37:50,327
not definitely rejecting the idea
470
00:37:50,466 --> 00:37:54,129
that in no way,
with any amount of uncertainty...
471
00:37:54,270 --> 00:37:55,259
Stop it!
472
00:37:55,405 --> 00:37:57,532
...I do not know where he shouldn't be.
473
00:37:57,674 --> 00:38:00,142
If that indeed wasn't where he isn't .
474
00:38:00,276 --> 00:38:03,871
Even if he wasn't not where
I knew he was, it could mean...
475
00:38:04,013 --> 00:38:06,243
On the good ship Lollipop
476
00:38:06,382 --> 00:38:10,785
Enough! Shrek went off
to bring back the next heir!
477
00:38:13,790 --> 00:38:15,587
He's bringing back the next heir?
478
00:38:15,725 --> 00:38:17,215
No!
479
00:38:18,461 --> 00:38:21,658
Hook! Get rid of this new " King" .
480
00:38:21,798 --> 00:38:23,663
But bring Shrek to me.
481
00:38:23,800 --> 00:38:26,997
I have something special
in mind for him.
482
00:38:27,136 --> 00:38:29,297
He'll never fall for your tricks!
483
00:38:30,974 --> 00:38:32,635
Oh, boy.
484
00:38:42,485 --> 00:38:45,511
I can't believe it. Me, a king?
485
00:38:45,655 --> 00:38:48,681
I knew I came from royalty, but...
486
00:38:48,825 --> 00:38:50,918
...I figured everyone forgot about me.
487
00:38:51,060 --> 00:38:54,791
Oh, no. In fact the King
asked for you personally.
488
00:38:54,931 --> 00:38:57,491
Really? Wow.
489
00:38:58,835 --> 00:39:01,065
But I know it's not all fun and games.
490
00:39:01,204 --> 00:39:04,196
It really is
all fun and games, actually.
491
00:39:04,340 --> 00:39:07,935
Sure, you have to knight a few heroes,
launch a ship or two.
492
00:39:08,077 --> 00:39:12,411
By the way, make sure you hit the boat
just right with the bottle.
493
00:39:12,548 --> 00:39:15,346
Any idiot can hit a boat with a bottle.
494
00:39:16,185 --> 00:39:19,120
Well, I've heard
it's harder than it looks.
495
00:39:19,255 --> 00:39:21,223
This is going to be huge.
496
00:39:21,357 --> 00:39:26,226
Parties, princesses,
castles. Princesses.
497
00:39:26,362 --> 00:39:29,229
You'll be living in the lap of luxury.
498
00:39:29,365 --> 00:39:31,833
The finest chefs
will wait for your order.
499
00:39:31,968 --> 00:39:34,937
And fortunately,
you'll have the royal food tasters.
500
00:39:35,071 --> 00:39:36,766
What do they do?
501
00:39:36,906 --> 00:39:41,502
Taste the food before the King eats,
to make sure it's not poisoned.
502
00:39:41,644 --> 00:39:44,238
- Poisoned?
- Or too salty.
503
00:39:44,380 --> 00:39:47,907
Don't worry. Your bodyguards
will keep you safe.
504
00:39:48,051 --> 00:39:50,315
All of them willing
at a moment's notice
505
00:39:50,453 --> 00:39:53,286
to lay down their lives
out of devotion to you.
506
00:39:53,423 --> 00:39:54,856
Really?
507
00:39:54,991 --> 00:39:58,017
The whole kingdom will look
to you for wisdom and guidance.
508
00:39:58,394 --> 00:40:00,328
Make sure they don't die of famine!
509
00:40:00,463 --> 00:40:02,192
- Or plague.
- Plague is bad.
510
00:40:02,331 --> 00:40:05,232
The coughing, the groaning,
the festering sores.
511
00:40:06,803 --> 00:40:11,240
Festering sores!
You are one funny kitty cat.
512
00:40:11,908 --> 00:40:13,307
What did I say?
513
00:40:13,443 --> 00:40:15,809
We don't want Artie
getting the wrong idea.
514
00:40:16,579 --> 00:40:17,739
Artie?
515
00:40:22,018 --> 00:40:23,781
There goes my hip!
516
00:40:23,920 --> 00:40:26,081
Artie! What are you doing?
517
00:40:28,024 --> 00:40:30,151
What does it look like?!
518
00:40:32,829 --> 00:40:35,297
This really isn't up to you.
519
00:40:35,431 --> 00:40:38,298
I don't know anything about being king!
520
00:40:38,434 --> 00:40:40,368
You'll learn on the job!
521
00:40:42,271 --> 00:40:44,796
Sorry, but I'm going back.
522
00:40:44,941 --> 00:40:47,375
Back to what? Being a loser?
523
00:40:50,947 --> 00:40:52,505
Now look what you did!
524
00:40:53,282 --> 00:40:57,116
Look what I did?
Who's holding the wheel, chief?
525
00:40:58,121 --> 00:40:59,611
Shrek!
526
00:41:11,968 --> 00:41:13,959
Land ho!
527
00:41:26,482 --> 00:41:28,313
How humiliating.
528
00:41:29,318 --> 00:41:32,253
Oh, nice going, Your Highness.
529
00:41:32,388 --> 00:41:36,085
Now it's "Your Highness" ?
What happened to " loser" ?
530
00:41:36,225 --> 00:41:39,126
If you think this is getting you
out of anything, it isn't .
531
00:41:39,262 --> 00:41:43,028
We're heading back to Far Far Away
one way or another...
532
00:41:43,166 --> 00:41:45,600
...and you're going to be a father!
533
00:41:45,735 --> 00:41:47,168
What?
534
00:41:48,004 --> 00:41:49,562
You just said "father" .
535
00:41:49,705 --> 00:41:52,435
King! You're going to be king!
536
00:41:52,575 --> 00:41:55,567
"You're going to be king!" Yeah, right.
537
00:41:56,779 --> 00:41:58,212
Where are you going?
538
00:41:58,347 --> 00:42:00,815
Far Far Away... from you!
539
00:42:00,950 --> 00:42:02,918
Get back here, young man!
540
00:42:04,887 --> 00:42:07,378
Boss? I don't think he's coming back.
541
00:42:07,523 --> 00:42:10,720
Maybe it's for the best.
He's not exactly king material.
542
00:42:10,860 --> 00:42:14,091
When did you plan to tell him
you were supposed to be king?
543
00:42:14,230 --> 00:42:17,063
Oome on. Why would I do that?
544
00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:20,260
Besides, he'll be ten times
better at it than me.
545
00:42:20,403 --> 00:42:24,362
Then change your tactics
if you want to get anywhere with him.
546
00:42:26,709 --> 00:42:28,540
You're right, Donkey.
547
00:42:30,880 --> 00:42:32,404
What about this?
548
00:42:32,548 --> 00:42:36,382
- Shrek!
- Oome on. It's just a joke.
549
00:42:37,954 --> 00:42:39,285
Still...
550
00:42:56,072 --> 00:42:57,733
Listen, Artie.
551
00:42:58,307 --> 00:43:03,438
If you think this whole mad scene
ain't dope, I feel you, dude.
552
00:43:03,579 --> 00:43:07,709
I'm not trying to get up in your grill
or raise your roof.
553
00:43:07,850 --> 00:43:09,977
But what I am screamin' is, yo...
554
00:43:10,119 --> 00:43:13,316
...check out this
kazing thazing, bazaby!
555
00:43:13,456 --> 00:43:15,549
If it doesn't groove, or what I'm saying
556
00:43:15,691 --> 00:43:18,626
ain't straight trippin',
say, " Oh, no, you didn't !
557
00:43:18,761 --> 00:43:21,195
You're getting on my last nerve."
558
00:43:21,330 --> 00:43:24,322
And then I'll know it's ...
I'll know it's wack!
559
00:43:25,935 --> 00:43:27,129
Help!
560
00:43:27,270 --> 00:43:30,671
I've been kidnapped by a monster
who's trying to relate to me!
561
00:43:30,806 --> 00:43:34,435
- Artie, wait.
- Oome on! Help! Hello?
562
00:43:35,945 --> 00:43:39,642
Greetings, cosmic children
of the universe.
563
00:43:39,782 --> 00:43:41,716
Welcome to my serenity circle.
564
00:43:41,851 --> 00:43:45,981
Please leave any bad vibes
outside the healing vortex.
565
00:43:46,122 --> 00:43:47,953
Now prepare to...
566
00:43:53,629 --> 00:43:56,462
I knew I should have got that warranty!
567
00:43:59,368 --> 00:44:00,835
Mr. Merlin?
568
00:44:00,970 --> 00:44:02,437
You know this guy?
569
00:44:02,571 --> 00:44:06,837
Yeah. He was the school magic teacher,
until he had his nervous breakdown.
570
00:44:06,976 --> 00:44:10,343
Technically, I was merely a victim
of a level 3 fatigue.
571
00:44:10,479 --> 00:44:12,572
At the request of my therapist,
572
00:44:12,715 --> 00:44:16,344
and the school authorities, I retired
to the tranquility of nature
573
00:44:16,485 --> 00:44:18,646
to discover my divine purpose.
574
00:44:20,156 --> 00:44:23,557
Oan I interest anyone
in a snack or beverage?
575
00:44:23,693 --> 00:44:24,785
Uh, no.
576
00:44:24,927 --> 00:44:28,260
Sure you don't want to try
my Rock Au Gratin?
577
00:44:31,167 --> 00:44:32,634
It's organic.
578
00:44:32,768 --> 00:44:35,202
Thanks. I ate a boulder on the way in.
579
00:44:35,338 --> 00:44:38,273
We need directions to Far Far Away.
580
00:44:38,407 --> 00:44:40,932
"We" ? Who said I was going with you?
581
00:44:41,077 --> 00:44:45,446
I did. People are counting on you,
so don't try to weasel out of it.
582
00:44:45,581 --> 00:44:47,640
If the job's so great, you do it.
583
00:44:48,184 --> 00:44:52,450
Understand this, kid. No more
Mr. Nice Guy from here on out.
584
00:44:52,588 --> 00:44:54,886
That was your Mr. Nice Guy?
585
00:44:55,024 --> 00:44:56,958
Yeah, and I'm going to miss him.
586
00:44:57,093 --> 00:45:01,496
Why don't you go terrorize a village
and leave me alone!
587
00:45:01,630 --> 00:45:06,158
Was that a crack about ogres? You get
your royal highness to Far Far Away...
588
00:45:06,302 --> 00:45:10,329
...before I kick it there!
Now, which way am I kicking?
589
00:45:10,473 --> 00:45:12,304
I could tell you, but since you're
590
00:45:12,441 --> 00:45:14,966
in the midst
of a self-destructive rage spiral,
591
00:45:15,111 --> 00:45:17,636
it would be karmically irresponsible.
592
00:45:17,780 --> 00:45:21,443
Self-destructive...?
Are you going to help us or not?
593
00:45:21,584 --> 00:45:24,178
Most definitely, but only after you
594
00:45:24,320 --> 00:45:27,517
take the journey to your soul!
595
00:45:27,656 --> 00:45:29,021
I don't think so.
596
00:45:29,158 --> 00:45:32,992
It's either that
or primal scream therapy.
597
00:45:35,064 --> 00:45:37,726
All right. Journey to the soul.
598
00:45:38,567 --> 00:45:40,432
Now, all of you,
599
00:45:40,569 --> 00:45:43,094
look into the Fire of Truth
600
00:45:43,239 --> 00:45:46,231
and tell me what you see.
601
00:45:49,078 --> 00:45:50,943
Ooh, charades!
602
00:45:51,080 --> 00:45:55,847
Okay, I see a Dutch fudge torte
with cinnamon swirls!
603
00:45:55,985 --> 00:45:58,579
Okay, monster... go for it.
604
00:46:07,263 --> 00:46:08,958
I see a rainbow pony.
605
00:46:09,098 --> 00:46:11,032
Excellent work! Now the boy.
606
00:46:11,167 --> 00:46:12,634
This is lame.
607
00:46:12,768 --> 00:46:15,032
You're lame! Now just go for it.
608
00:46:16,605 --> 00:46:17,936
Okay.
609
00:46:18,774 --> 00:46:23,211
There's a baby bird and a father bird
sitting in a nest.
610
00:46:23,345 --> 00:46:25,336
Yes! Stay with it!
611
00:46:26,182 --> 00:46:30,175
The dad just flew away. Why did
he leave the little bird all alone?
612
00:46:30,853 --> 00:46:34,289
It's trying to fly,
but it doesn't know how to.
613
00:46:35,191 --> 00:46:37,352
It's going to fall!
614
00:46:42,198 --> 00:46:46,191
Proper head case you are.
Really messed up.
615
00:46:49,538 --> 00:46:54,532
Okay, I get it. The bird's me.
My dad left. So what?
616
00:47:06,555 --> 00:47:09,217
Look, Artie, um...
617
00:47:13,562 --> 00:47:16,326
Just thought I'd help set the mood...
618
00:47:16,465 --> 00:47:19,798
...for your big heart-to-heart chat.
619
00:47:28,244 --> 00:47:31,577
I know what it's like
to not feel ready for something.
620
00:47:33,916 --> 00:47:36,248
Even ogres get scared.
621
00:47:37,086 --> 00:47:39,919
You know... once in a while.
622
00:47:41,924 --> 00:47:45,690
I know you want me
to be king, but I can't .
623
00:47:45,828 --> 00:47:48,695
I'm not cut out for it,
and I never will be.
624
00:47:49,598 --> 00:47:52,089
Even my own dad knew
I wasn't worth the trouble.
625
00:47:52,234 --> 00:47:55,431
He dumped me at that school
first chance he got...
626
00:47:56,105 --> 00:47:58,437
...and I never heard from him again.
627
00:48:00,109 --> 00:48:03,943
My dad wasn't really
the fatherly type, either.
628
00:48:04,446 --> 00:48:06,607
I doubt he was worse than mine.
629
00:48:07,449 --> 00:48:08,746
Oh, yeah?
630
00:48:08,884 --> 00:48:12,945
My father was an ogre.
He tried to eat me.
631
00:48:13,789 --> 00:48:15,984
I guess I should have realized it.
632
00:48:16,125 --> 00:48:20,391
He bathed me in barbecue sauce and
put me to bed with an apple in my mouth.
633
00:48:22,298 --> 00:48:24,789
I guess that's pretty bad.
634
00:48:27,136 --> 00:48:29,331
It may be hard to believe,
635
00:48:29,471 --> 00:48:32,929
what, with my obvious charm
and good looks,
636
00:48:33,075 --> 00:48:36,010
but people used
to think I was a monster.
637
00:48:36,145 --> 00:48:39,808
And for a long time, I believed them.
638
00:48:41,817 --> 00:48:43,409
But after a while,
639
00:48:43,552 --> 00:48:47,079
you learn to ignore
the names people call you
640
00:48:47,223 --> 00:48:49,555
and just trust who you are.
641
00:48:51,660 --> 00:48:54,823
You know... you're okay, Shrek.
642
00:48:55,664 --> 00:48:59,225
You just need to do a little less
yelling and use a little more soap.
643
00:49:00,569 --> 00:49:02,196
Thanks, Artie.
644
00:49:02,338 --> 00:49:06,001
The soap's because
you stink... really bad.
645
00:49:07,176 --> 00:49:09,667
Yeah... I got that.
646
00:49:13,682 --> 00:49:16,549
This place is filthy!
647
00:49:16,852 --> 00:49:18,444
I feel like a hobo.
648
00:49:19,688 --> 00:49:22,452
I'm sorry, but this
isn't working for me.
649
00:49:22,591 --> 00:49:27,153
Everything's always about you.
It's not like your attitude is helping.
650
00:49:27,296 --> 00:49:30,993
Maybe itjust bothers you
I was voted fairest in the land.
651
00:49:31,133 --> 00:49:33,226
You mean in that rigged election?
652
00:49:33,369 --> 00:49:36,338
Give me a break. " Rapunzel, Rapunzel...
653
00:49:36,472 --> 00:49:39,600
...let down thy golden extensions!"
654
00:49:39,742 --> 00:49:44,543
Ladies, let go of your petty complaints
and let's work together!
655
00:49:47,516 --> 00:49:50,508
So I guess the plan is
we just wander aimlessly
656
00:49:50,653 --> 00:49:52,746
in this stinkhole until we rot.
657
00:49:52,888 --> 00:49:56,415
No, we get inside and find out
what Oharming's up to.
658
00:49:56,558 --> 00:49:59,254
I know he's a jerk and everything,
659
00:49:59,395 --> 00:50:03,559
but that Oharming
makes me hotter than July.
660
00:50:04,900 --> 00:50:06,231
That's it!
661
00:50:34,263 --> 00:50:36,629
Oome on! This way!
662
00:50:36,765 --> 00:50:37,754
Rapunzel, wait!
663
00:50:47,276 --> 00:50:49,107
Oharming, let go of her.
664
00:50:49,244 --> 00:50:51,872
But why would I want to do that?
665
00:50:57,419 --> 00:50:58,408
What?
666
00:50:58,554 --> 00:51:03,651
Say hello, ladies,
to the new Queen of Far Far Away.
667
00:51:07,663 --> 00:51:09,460
Rapunzel, how could you?
668
00:51:09,598 --> 00:51:11,862
Jealous much?
669
00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:14,434
Soon you'll be back
where you started,
670
00:51:14,570 --> 00:51:17,198
scrubbing floors
or locked away in towers.
671
00:51:17,339 --> 00:51:20,968
That is, if I let you last the week.
672
00:51:23,278 --> 00:51:25,872
Pookie, you promised not to hurt them.
673
00:51:26,014 --> 00:51:30,007
Not here, kitten whiskers.
Daddy will discuss it later.
674
00:51:30,753 --> 00:51:33,278
Now forgive us.
We have a show to put on.
675
00:51:33,422 --> 00:51:36,687
Shrek will be back soon,
and you'll be sorry.
676
00:51:36,825 --> 00:51:38,224
Sorry?!
677
00:51:38,360 --> 00:51:42,626
Don't you realize once Shrek
sets foot in Far Far Away...
678
00:51:42,765 --> 00:51:44,528
...he's doomed?
679
00:52:24,072 --> 00:52:25,699
Look out! They got a piano!
680
00:52:25,841 --> 00:52:29,208
Kill them all... except the fat one.
681
00:52:29,344 --> 00:52:33,713
King Oharming has something special
in mind for you, ogre.
682
00:52:33,849 --> 00:52:35,146
King Oharming?
683
00:52:35,284 --> 00:52:36,308
Attack!
684
00:52:42,591 --> 00:52:43,751
Artie, duck!
685
00:52:58,307 --> 00:52:59,569
Ready the plank!
686
00:53:15,290 --> 00:53:16,951
- Shrek!
- Help!
687
00:53:36,278 --> 00:53:37,575
Oowards!
688
00:53:37,713 --> 00:53:40,079
What has Oharming done with Fiona?
689
00:53:40,215 --> 00:53:42,809
She's going to get what's coming to her.
690
00:53:43,385 --> 00:53:48,288
And there ain't nothing
you can do to stop him!
691
00:53:48,423 --> 00:53:50,948
- We've got to save her.
- But she's so far far away!
692
00:53:51,894 --> 00:53:54,192
Get yourself back
to Worcestershire, kid.
693
00:53:54,329 --> 00:53:57,821
No, Shrek. Hold on. I've got an idea.
694
00:53:57,966 --> 00:54:00,230
I am a buzzing bee.
695
00:54:00,903 --> 00:54:04,100
Mr. Merlin?
They need a spell to get them...
696
00:54:04,239 --> 00:54:07,265
...I mean us, back to Far Far Away.
697
00:54:07,409 --> 00:54:10,845
Forget it. I don't have that kind
of magic in me anymore.
698
00:54:10,979 --> 00:54:14,676
How about a hug?
That's the best kind of magic.
699
00:54:14,816 --> 00:54:17,182
Please. I know you can do it.
700
00:54:17,319 --> 00:54:19,116
I said forget it!
701
00:54:19,254 --> 00:54:20,585
But...
702
00:54:27,996 --> 00:54:29,588
What's with you?
703
00:54:30,933 --> 00:54:34,096
It's just so hard, you know?
704
00:54:34,770 --> 00:54:38,900
They need to get back,
cause their kingdom's in trouble.
705
00:54:39,041 --> 00:54:41,566
Cause there's a really bad man.
706
00:54:41,710 --> 00:54:43,473
It's just so hard!
707
00:54:43,612 --> 00:54:45,739
Take it easy.
708
00:54:45,881 --> 00:54:49,248
No! I don't think you understand!
709
00:54:49,384 --> 00:54:53,912
There's a mean person doing
mean things to good people.
710
00:54:54,056 --> 00:54:55,751
Have a heart, old man.
711
00:54:55,891 --> 00:55:00,055
They really need your help to get back.
Why won't you help them?!
712
00:55:03,899 --> 00:55:05,491
Okay.
713
00:55:05,634 --> 00:55:07,625
I'll go get my things.
714
00:55:10,405 --> 00:55:11,599
Piece of cake.
715
00:55:11,740 --> 00:55:15,267
Well, well. You want eggs with that ham?
716
00:55:15,410 --> 00:55:19,107
I am a little rusty, so there
could be some side effects.
717
00:55:19,247 --> 00:55:20,714
- Side effects?
- Don't worry.
718
00:55:20,849 --> 00:55:24,615
Whatever it is, no matter
how excruciatingly painful,
719
00:55:24,753 --> 00:55:27,916
it will wear off eventually. I think.
720
00:55:29,891 --> 00:55:32,121
- Oops.
- You sure about this?
721
00:55:32,260 --> 00:55:36,390
If Artie trusts him,
that's good enough for me.
722
00:55:36,531 --> 00:55:38,396
Even if his robe doesn't cover...
723
00:55:38,533 --> 00:55:41,058
Alacritious expeditious...
724
00:55:41,203 --> 00:55:43,899
...a-zoomy-zoom-zoom!
725
00:55:44,039 --> 00:55:46,872
Let's help our friends get back...
726
00:55:49,611 --> 00:55:50,942
...soon!
727
00:55:58,286 --> 00:55:59,878
It worked!
728
00:56:08,597 --> 00:56:11,623
I haven't been on a trip
like that since college!
729
00:56:12,067 --> 00:56:13,329
Donkey?
730
00:56:13,468 --> 00:56:16,301
What? Is something in my teeth?
731
00:56:18,740 --> 00:56:23,734
Oh, no! I've been abracadabra-ed into
a Fancy Feastin', second-rate sidekick!
732
00:56:26,081 --> 00:56:30,142
At least you don't look
like some kind of bloated pi๏ฟฝata!
733
00:56:30,285 --> 00:56:32,344
You should think about going on a diet!
734
00:56:32,487 --> 00:56:37,083
You should get yourself a pair of pants.
I feel all exposed and nasty!
735
00:56:38,760 --> 00:56:41,092
So you two think this is funny?
736
00:56:43,598 --> 00:56:45,395
I'm really sorry, guys.
737
00:56:45,534 --> 00:56:48,002
Don't be. You got us back, kid.
738
00:56:53,675 --> 00:56:55,802
How in the Hans Ohristian Andersen
739
00:56:55,944 --> 00:56:58,708
am I supposed to parade around
in these goofy boots?
740
00:56:58,847 --> 00:57:01,680
Hey, hey, hey!
Be very careful with those.
741
00:57:03,118 --> 00:57:06,451
They were made in Madrid
by the finest...
742
00:57:07,122 --> 00:57:09,113
You'll learn to control that.
743
00:57:12,027 --> 00:57:17,021
Seriously. Ow! You need some comfort
inserts or arch supports or something.
744
00:57:23,205 --> 00:57:28,074
Watch it. I'm walking here
and I'm gonna keep going until...
745
00:57:28,210 --> 00:57:29,302
Pinocchio!
746
00:57:30,045 --> 00:57:32,070
Shrek! Help me!
747
00:57:32,214 --> 00:57:35,411
- What happened?
- Oharming and the villains took over!
748
00:57:35,550 --> 00:57:39,316
Fiona and the Princesses got away.
Now she's ...
749
00:57:39,454 --> 00:57:40,978
She's what?! What?!
750
00:57:43,325 --> 00:57:45,156
Puss! Loan me five bucks.
751
00:57:45,293 --> 00:57:47,523
You heard him. Help the brother out.
752
00:57:47,662 --> 00:57:49,755
Do you see any pockets on me?
753
00:57:49,898 --> 00:57:51,729
Hold on a second.
754
00:57:54,236 --> 00:57:58,400
I had no idea, really. I... I swear.
755
00:57:59,574 --> 00:58:01,769
Quick! Where is Fiona?
756
00:58:01,910 --> 00:58:05,676
Oharming has her locked away
someplace. You have to find him!
757
00:58:05,814 --> 00:58:08,681
He's probably getting ready
for the show!
758
00:58:08,817 --> 00:58:11,149
Wait, Pinocchio! What show?
759
00:58:16,158 --> 00:58:18,558
" It's a Happily Ever After After All" .
760
00:58:18,693 --> 00:58:21,025
" Shrek's final performance" ?
761
00:58:21,163 --> 00:58:25,293
Shrek! You didn't tell us
you were in a play!
762
00:58:25,433 --> 00:58:28,891
I guess I've been so busy
I forgot to mention it.
763
00:58:29,037 --> 00:58:30,595
The ogre! Get him!
764
00:58:31,940 --> 00:58:34,272
Don't worry, jefe. I got this.
765
00:58:40,816 --> 00:58:42,443
Uck! Kill it!
766
00:58:43,451 --> 00:58:48,582
Look. Don't you know who
he thinks he is? How dare you!
767
00:58:48,723 --> 00:58:50,247
We're dealing with amateurs.
768
00:58:50,392 --> 00:58:55,329
He's a star, people! Hello?
I'm so sorry about this, Mr. Shrek.
769
00:58:55,463 --> 00:58:56,987
I'm going to lose it!
770
00:58:57,132 --> 00:59:00,932
Is everything ready? You did get
the list for the dressing room?
771
00:59:01,069 --> 00:59:04,163
Breakfast croissant stuffed
with seared sashimi tuna.
772
00:59:04,306 --> 00:59:07,605
And I hope you have the saffron corn
with jalapeno honey butter.
773
00:59:07,742 --> 00:59:10,734
Our client cannot get
into his proper emotional state
774
00:59:10,879 --> 00:59:12,676
withoutjalapeno honey butter!
775
00:59:12,814 --> 00:59:14,213
I just lost it.
776
00:59:14,983 --> 00:59:17,508
They should talk to Nancy
in Human Resources.
777
00:59:17,652 --> 00:59:21,144
Oh, we will have much to say
to Nancy, I promise!
778
00:59:22,824 --> 00:59:26,521
"With this sword, I do..." No. "With..."
779
00:59:26,661 --> 00:59:30,324
"With this sword, I do smote thee!"
780
00:59:31,233 --> 00:59:33,701
Is " smote" the right word? " Smoot" ?
781
00:59:33,835 --> 00:59:35,700
I don't think that's a word.
782
00:59:35,837 --> 00:59:40,171
Maybe I should just " smite" him.
Let's try this again. Now...
783
00:59:41,343 --> 00:59:44,506
Shrek attacks me.
I pretend to be afraid.
784
00:59:45,247 --> 00:59:49,650
" Now the kingdom will get the happily
ever after they deserve. Die, ogre!"
785
00:59:49,784 --> 00:59:53,447
Blah, blah, blah. Oh,
itjust doesn't feel real enough!
786
00:59:55,357 --> 00:59:57,382
Who told you to stop dancing?!
787
00:59:57,525 --> 00:59:58,992
Wink and turn.
788
00:59:59,127 --> 01:00:02,358
What are you laying around for?
Get up! Honestly!
789
01:00:11,039 --> 01:00:14,236
Our happily ever after
is nearly complete, Mummy.
790
01:00:14,376 --> 01:00:16,571
And I assure you...
791
01:00:16,711 --> 01:00:21,705
...the people of this kingdom
will pay dearly for every second...
792
01:00:22,884 --> 01:00:24,545
...we've had to wait.
793
01:00:26,154 --> 01:00:27,587
Break a leg.
794
01:00:27,722 --> 01:00:30,486
On second thought,
let me break it for you.
795
01:00:30,625 --> 01:00:34,925
Thank goodness. I was afraid
you wouldn't get back in time.
796
01:00:35,063 --> 01:00:36,690
Where's Fiona?
797
01:00:36,831 --> 01:00:41,063
Don't worry. She and the others
are safe... for now.
798
01:00:50,245 --> 01:00:53,578
Let me guess. Arthur.
799
01:00:54,249 --> 01:00:56,274
It's Artie, actually.
800
01:00:56,418 --> 01:01:01,412
This boy is supposed to be
the new King of Far Far Away?
801
01:01:03,325 --> 01:01:04,622
How pathetic.
802
01:01:04,759 --> 01:01:07,626
Stand still, so I won't make a mess.
803
01:01:07,762 --> 01:01:11,198
Oharming, stop! I'm here now.
You got what you wanted.
804
01:01:11,333 --> 01:01:12,994
This isn't about him.
805
01:01:13,768 --> 01:01:18,102
Then who's it about?
I'm supposed to be king, right?
806
01:01:19,441 --> 01:01:23,810
You weren't really next in line
for the throne.
807
01:01:23,945 --> 01:01:25,344
I was.
808
01:01:25,480 --> 01:01:28,813
But you said the King
asked for me personally.
809
01:01:28,950 --> 01:01:30,781
Not exactly.
810
01:01:30,919 --> 01:01:32,352
What does that mean?
811
01:01:32,487 --> 01:01:34,978
I said whatever I had to say, all right?
812
01:01:35,123 --> 01:01:38,820
I wasn't right for the job,
so I needed some fool to replace me.
813
01:01:38,960 --> 01:01:42,623
And you fit the bill. So just go!
814
01:01:45,700 --> 01:01:47,759
You were playing me the whole time.
815
01:01:47,902 --> 01:01:49,665
You catch on real fast, kid.
816
01:01:49,804 --> 01:01:52,898
Maybe you're not
as big of a loser as I thought.
817
01:01:59,314 --> 01:02:01,680
You know, for a minute...
818
01:02:01,816 --> 01:02:03,716
- ...I actually thought...
- What?
819
01:02:03,852 --> 01:02:07,344
That he cared about you? He's an ogre.
820
01:02:07,489 --> 01:02:09,320
What did you expect?
821
01:02:19,300 --> 01:02:23,327
You really do have a way
with children, Shrek.
822
01:02:35,683 --> 01:02:39,483
Leave me out with the waste
823
01:02:39,621 --> 01:02:42,556
This is not what I do
824
01:02:42,690 --> 01:02:46,387
It's the wrong time
825
01:02:46,528 --> 01:02:49,224
She's pulling me through
826
01:02:49,364 --> 01:02:53,061
It's a small crime
827
01:02:53,201 --> 01:02:55,829
And I got no excuse
828
01:02:55,970 --> 01:02:58,370
And is that all right, yeah?
829
01:02:59,841 --> 01:03:01,866
Is that all right with you?
830
01:03:02,710 --> 01:03:07,044
Is that all right, yeah?
831
01:03:07,549 --> 01:03:11,542
If I give my gun away when it's loaded?
832
01:03:13,721 --> 01:03:18,385
If you don't shoot it
how am I supposed to hold it?
833
01:03:21,563 --> 01:03:24,430
Is that all right?
Is that all right?
834
01:03:24,566 --> 01:03:28,002
Is that all right with you?
835
01:03:28,136 --> 01:03:29,001
No.
836
01:03:29,337 --> 01:03:31,168
Had we stayed put like I suggested,
837
01:03:31,306 --> 01:03:34,104
we'd be sipping tea
out of little heart-shaped cups.
838
01:03:34,242 --> 01:03:35,766
Yeah, heart-shaped cups.
839
01:03:35,910 --> 01:03:38,538
And eating crumpets
smothered with loganberries.
840
01:03:38,680 --> 01:03:40,272
Yeah, loganberries.
841
01:03:40,415 --> 01:03:42,280
- Shut up, Oindy.
- Yeah, shut up.
842
01:03:42,417 --> 01:03:45,284
- No, you shut up.
- Stay out of this.
843
01:03:45,420 --> 01:03:48,218
Who cares who's " running the kingdom" ?
844
01:03:48,356 --> 01:03:51,587
- I care.
- You should all care.
845
01:03:55,563 --> 01:03:58,464
I have your badge number, tin can!
846
01:03:58,600 --> 01:04:00,465
- Donkey?
- Princess!
847
01:04:00,602 --> 01:04:01,591
Puss?
848
01:04:01,736 --> 01:04:05,797
I am Puss, stuck here
inside this hideous body.
849
01:04:05,940 --> 01:04:06,964
And I'm me!
850
01:04:07,108 --> 01:04:08,234
But you're...
851
01:04:08,376 --> 01:04:11,038
Everything's fruity in the loops,
but what happened is
852
01:04:11,179 --> 01:04:13,147
we went to high school,
the boat crashed
853
01:04:13,281 --> 01:04:15,841
and we got bippity-boppity-booped
by the magic man.
854
01:04:15,984 --> 01:04:18,179
You poor sweet things.
855
01:04:18,319 --> 01:04:19,718
I don't get it.
856
01:04:19,854 --> 01:04:23,585
The cat turned into a little horse
that smells like feet. What's to get?
857
01:04:23,725 --> 01:04:25,090
Who dat?
858
01:04:25,226 --> 01:04:26,250
Where's Shrek?
859
01:04:26,394 --> 01:04:30,387
Oharming has him. He plans to kill Shrek
tonight in front of the whole kingdom!
860
01:04:31,799 --> 01:04:35,963
All right, everyone.
We need to find a way out now.
861
01:04:36,104 --> 01:04:39,631
You're right.
Ladies, assume the position!
862
01:04:44,512 --> 01:04:45,706
What are you doing?
863
01:04:46,481 --> 01:04:47,846
Waiting to be rescued.
864
01:04:47,982 --> 01:04:49,950
You've got to be kidding me.
865
01:04:50,084 --> 01:04:52,848
What else can we do? We're just four...
866
01:04:52,987 --> 01:04:56,286
...I mean three, super-hot princesses...
867
01:04:56,424 --> 01:05:00,485
...two circus freaks, a pregnant ogre
and an old lady!
868
01:05:01,329 --> 01:05:05,663
Excuse me. Old lady coming through.
869
01:05:14,275 --> 01:05:16,072
Mom!
870
01:05:16,211 --> 01:05:20,477
You didn't think you got your fighting
skills from your father, did you?
871
01:05:20,615 --> 01:05:23,345
Excuse me. There's still one more.
872
01:05:33,528 --> 01:05:35,860
Why don't you just lie down?
873
01:05:38,533 --> 01:05:41,400
Okay, girls, from here on out...
874
01:05:41,536 --> 01:05:44,004
...we take care of business ourselves.
875
01:06:01,055 --> 01:06:05,583
The Far Far Away Theatre at the
Charming Pavilion is proud to present...
876
01:06:05,727 --> 01:06:07,490
..."It's A Happily Ever After
After AII."
877
01:06:07,629 --> 01:06:10,928
Enjoy your evening
of theatrical reverie, citizen.
878
01:06:11,065 --> 01:06:14,398
Oi! No food or beverages in the theater!
879
01:06:28,249 --> 01:06:29,614
Places, everyone!
880
01:06:34,756 --> 01:06:35,882
Easy!
881
01:06:36,024 --> 01:06:39,926
Sorry. I was showing off
for the little one.
882
01:06:40,662 --> 01:06:44,257
It's Bring Your Kids to Work Day.
Oome here, beautiful.
883
01:06:47,435 --> 01:06:50,427
Well, she's got your eye.
884
01:06:51,673 --> 01:06:56,610
Who would have thought a monster like
me deserved something as special as you?
885
01:07:38,286 --> 01:07:41,312
Little birdies, take wing
886
01:07:42,156 --> 01:07:44,784
Flitting down from the trees they appear
887
01:07:44,926 --> 01:07:47,394
And to chirp in my ear
888
01:07:48,663 --> 01:07:51,655
All because I sing
889
01:08:21,295 --> 01:08:22,353
Move it! Go!
890
01:08:28,970 --> 01:08:30,699
My babies!
891
01:08:31,706 --> 01:08:32,695
Help!
892
01:09:18,252 --> 01:09:20,243
Hey, how's it goin'
893
01:09:30,932 --> 01:09:32,866
O to the K. The coast is clear.
894
01:09:33,000 --> 01:09:35,628
Let's do this. Go, Team Dynamite!
895
01:09:35,770 --> 01:09:39,604
I thought we agreed to use the name
Team Super Oool.
896
01:09:39,740 --> 01:09:41,970
I recall it was Team Awesome.
897
01:09:42,109 --> 01:09:44,043
I voted for Team Alpha Wolf Squadron.
898
01:09:44,178 --> 01:09:46,146
Okay! From henceforth,
899
01:09:46,280 --> 01:09:50,410
we will be Team Alpha Super Awesome
Oool Dynamite Wolf Squadron.
900
01:09:50,551 --> 01:09:54,783
Ach de liebe! There is some strange
little girl over there staring at us!
901
01:09:55,723 --> 01:09:57,088
Artie!
902
01:09:57,225 --> 01:09:58,590
Wait, wait!
903
01:09:58,726 --> 01:10:00,921
Where is the fire, se๏ฟฝor?
904
01:10:01,062 --> 01:10:03,087
Please. Don't act so innocent.
905
01:10:03,231 --> 01:10:06,997
You both knew what was going on
and kept it to yourselves.
906
01:10:07,134 --> 01:10:08,726
It's not like it seems.
907
01:10:08,870 --> 01:10:11,703
It's not? I think it seems pretty clear.
908
01:10:11,839 --> 01:10:14,364
He was using me. That's all.
909
01:10:14,509 --> 01:10:16,943
Using you? You really don't get it.
910
01:10:17,078 --> 01:10:20,070
Shrek only said
those things to protect you.
911
01:10:20,748 --> 01:10:25,412
Oharming was going to kill you, Artie!
Shrek saved your life.
912
01:10:35,997 --> 01:10:37,589
Oue the spot!
913
01:10:41,435 --> 01:10:43,960
I wait alone up here
914
01:10:44,105 --> 01:10:46,801
I'm trapped another day
915
01:10:46,941 --> 01:10:50,138
Locked up here, please set me free
916
01:10:50,278 --> 01:10:53,304
My new life I almost see
917
01:10:53,447 --> 01:10:56,143
A castle, you and me
918
01:10:56,284 --> 01:11:01,381
Yes, a castle, you and me
919
01:11:03,457 --> 01:11:04,515
Oherubs!
920
01:11:08,462 --> 01:11:12,262
Tis I, Tis I
Upon my regal steed
921
01:11:12,400 --> 01:11:14,027
Princess, my love
922
01:11:14,168 --> 01:11:16,932
At last you shall be freed
I'm strong
923
01:11:17,071 --> 01:11:19,039
And brave
And dashing my way there
924
01:11:19,473 --> 01:11:25,139
With speed! With might!
With soft and bouncy hair!
925
01:11:26,113 --> 01:11:29,879
- Through the blistering desert
- Hot!
926
01:11:30,017 --> 01:11:33,043
- Across the stormiest sea
- Wet!
927
01:11:33,187 --> 01:11:35,178
Facing creatures so vile
928
01:11:35,323 --> 01:11:36,449
Foul!
929
01:11:36,591 --> 01:11:40,721
So you can gaze upon me!
930
01:11:42,029 --> 01:11:44,361
I knew you'd come for me
931
01:11:44,498 --> 01:11:48,332
And now we finally meet
932
01:11:48,469 --> 01:11:49,936
I knew you'd wait
933
01:11:50,071 --> 01:11:54,599
And from my plate of love you'd eat
934
01:12:14,528 --> 01:12:17,861
Who is this terribly ugly fiend
Who so rudely intervened?
935
01:12:17,999 --> 01:12:19,830
Will Charming fight or flee?
936
01:12:19,967 --> 01:12:21,025
Please rescue me!
937
01:12:21,168 --> 01:12:22,863
From this monstrosity!
938
01:12:23,004 --> 01:12:28,032
Fear thee not, honey lamb!
I will slice this thing up like a ham!
939
01:12:29,210 --> 01:12:30,677
Oh, boy.
940
01:12:30,811 --> 01:12:34,406
You are about to enter a world of pain
941
01:12:34,548 --> 01:12:38,882
With which you are not familiar!
942
01:12:42,323 --> 01:12:46,726
It can't be any more painful
than your lousy performance.
943
01:12:50,398 --> 01:12:52,389
" Prepare, foul beast."
944
01:12:54,502 --> 01:12:57,767
Prepare, foul beast, your time is done!
945
01:12:57,905 --> 01:13:01,068
Oould you kill me and then sing?
946
01:13:02,576 --> 01:13:04,271
Be quiet!
947
01:13:04,412 --> 01:13:08,542
I'm just having fun with you.
That's actually a very nice leotard.
948
01:13:08,683 --> 01:13:09,945
Thank you.
949
01:13:10,084 --> 01:13:12,177
Do they come in men's sizes?
950
01:13:15,256 --> 01:13:16,985
Now that be funny!
951
01:13:17,124 --> 01:13:19,092
Enough!
952
01:13:21,495 --> 01:13:25,295
Now you'll finally
know what it's like...
953
01:13:25,433 --> 01:13:28,960
...to have everything you worked for...
954
01:13:29,103 --> 01:13:33,130
...everything that's precious to you,
taken away.
955
01:13:33,274 --> 01:13:36,607
Now you'll know how I felt.
956
01:13:43,951 --> 01:13:45,612
Sausage roll!
957
01:14:02,970 --> 01:14:05,495
Pray for mercy from Puss!
958
01:14:05,639 --> 01:14:07,129
And Donkey!
959
01:14:07,341 --> 01:14:08,399
D
960
01:14:19,420 --> 01:14:20,682
Hi, honey.
961
01:14:20,821 --> 01:14:23,847
Sorry we're late. You okay?
962
01:14:23,991 --> 01:14:26,323
Much better, now that you're here.
963
01:14:28,996 --> 01:14:34,195
So, Oharming, you want to let me out of
these so we can settle this ogre-to-man?
964
01:14:34,335 --> 01:14:38,669
Ooh, that sounds fun.
But I have a better idea.
965
01:14:54,522 --> 01:14:56,922
No! Let go of me!
966
01:14:57,057 --> 01:15:01,187
You will not ruin things
this time, ogre. Kill it.
967
01:15:05,032 --> 01:15:06,795
Everybody, stop!
968
01:15:08,636 --> 01:15:10,729
Oh, what is it now?!
969
01:15:10,871 --> 01:15:12,133
Artie?
970
01:15:21,816 --> 01:15:24,284
Who thinks we need
to settle things this way?
971
01:15:28,556 --> 01:15:32,253
You mean you want to be villains
your whole lives?
972
01:15:32,393 --> 01:15:36,193
But we are villains!
It's the only thing we know.
973
01:15:36,330 --> 01:15:38,764
You never wish
you could be something else?
974
01:15:38,899 --> 01:15:42,357
Easy for you to say. You're not
some evil enchanted tree.
975
01:15:42,503 --> 01:15:45,267
You morons! Don't listen to him! Attack!
976
01:15:45,406 --> 01:15:48,204
What Steve means is
it's hard to come by honest work
977
01:15:48,342 --> 01:15:50,367
when the whole world's against you.
978
01:15:50,511 --> 01:15:52,240
Right. Thanks, Ed.
979
01:15:52,379 --> 01:15:56,782
Fair enough. You're right.
I'm not a talking tree.
980
01:15:56,917 --> 01:15:58,009
But you know...
981
01:15:58,152 --> 01:16:01,280
...a good friend once told me...
982
01:16:01,422 --> 01:16:06,450
...just because people treat you
like a villain, or an ogre...
983
01:16:06,594 --> 01:16:08,585
...orjust some loser...
984
01:16:10,097 --> 01:16:11,997
...doesn't mean you are one.
985
01:16:14,869 --> 01:16:18,737
What matters most
is what you think of yourself.
986
01:16:18,873 --> 01:16:23,173
If there's something you really want,
or someone you want to be...
987
01:16:23,310 --> 01:16:26,939
...the only person standing
in your way is you.
988
01:16:27,448 --> 01:16:29,211
- Me?
- Get him!
989
01:16:29,350 --> 01:16:30,749
No, no, no!
990
01:16:30,885 --> 01:16:33,820
What I mean is each of you...
991
01:16:33,954 --> 01:16:36,218
...is standing in your own way.
992
01:16:40,127 --> 01:16:42,618
I always wanted to play the flute.
993
01:16:42,763 --> 01:16:46,426
I'd like to open up a spa... in France!
994
01:16:46,567 --> 01:16:51,129
I grow daffodils. And they're beautiful.
995
01:17:39,853 --> 01:17:43,016
A new era finally begins!
996
01:17:44,858 --> 01:17:46,519
Now all of you...
997
01:17:47,361 --> 01:17:49,761
...bow before your King!
998
01:17:56,203 --> 01:17:58,535
You need to work on your aim.
999
01:18:00,874 --> 01:18:03,741
This was supposed to be
my happily ever after!
1000
01:18:03,877 --> 01:18:06,368
Well, you need to keep looking...
1001
01:18:08,382 --> 01:18:10,441
...because I'm not giving up mine.
1002
01:18:15,723 --> 01:18:16,883
Mommy?
1003
01:18:28,235 --> 01:18:30,396
It's yours if you want it.
1004
01:18:31,071 --> 01:18:33,403
But this time it's your choice.
1005
01:18:56,096 --> 01:18:57,120
Author!
1006
01:18:57,264 --> 01:19:00,597
Artie! Artie! Artie! Artie!
1007
01:19:04,938 --> 01:19:07,930
Excuse me. That's my seat.
1008
01:19:08,942 --> 01:19:13,709
Okay, Se๏ฟฝor Hocusy-Pocusy, the time
has come to rectify some wrongs!
1009
01:19:13,847 --> 01:19:16,372
Though I have been enjoying
these cat baths.
1010
01:19:16,517 --> 01:19:18,007
Please say you didn't .
1011
01:19:18,152 --> 01:19:20,052
All right! Look.
1012
01:19:20,187 --> 01:19:23,486
You'll feel a pinch and possibly
lower intestinal discomfort...
1013
01:19:23,624 --> 01:19:25,956
...but this should do the trick.
1014
01:19:30,197 --> 01:19:32,665
- Are you...?
- I'm me again!
1015
01:19:32,800 --> 01:19:35,064
- And I am not you!
- All right!
1016
01:19:36,637 --> 01:19:37,797
Oops.
1017
01:19:39,807 --> 01:19:41,206
Ah, never mind.
1018
01:19:45,212 --> 01:19:49,273
What did I tell you?
The kid's going to be a great king.
1019
01:19:49,416 --> 01:19:52,977
Well, for what it's worth,
you would have, too.
1020
01:19:54,488 --> 01:19:57,480
I have something
much more important in mind.
1021
01:20:23,016 --> 01:20:24,244
Finally.
1022
01:20:31,024 --> 01:20:32,355
Dada.
1023
01:20:34,461 --> 01:20:38,830
Was I wrong about the world?
It's a beautiful new place
1024
01:20:38,966 --> 01:20:41,457
I smell Shrek Junior!
1025
01:20:41,602 --> 01:20:44,264
Where else could a creep like me
1026
01:20:44,404 --> 01:20:47,134
Meet such a pretty face
1027
01:20:47,274 --> 01:20:51,210
Meeting every day with the rising sun
1028
01:20:54,014 --> 01:20:56,915
Looking up, it's looking like
1029
01:20:57,050 --> 01:20:59,712
My losing streak is done
1030
01:21:00,621 --> 01:21:01,918
Peek-a-boo!
1031
01:21:02,055 --> 01:21:03,386
Peek-a-boo!
1032
01:21:06,593 --> 01:21:08,424
A bouncy, bouncy, boy!
1033
01:21:08,562 --> 01:21:11,258
Used to always feel like
1034
01:21:11,398 --> 01:21:14,060
Wished that I was dressed better
1035
01:21:15,068 --> 01:21:16,729
Where's the baby?
1036
01:21:16,870 --> 01:21:21,239
Never had a lot of luck
Until I finally met her
1037
01:21:30,751 --> 01:21:34,744
Meeting every day with the rising sun
1038
01:21:37,424 --> 01:21:39,585
Looking up, it's looking like
1039
01:21:40,260 --> 01:21:43,093
My losing streak is done
1040
01:21:45,265 --> 01:21:47,597
My losing streak is done
1041
01:21:58,445 --> 01:22:01,107
Well... what shall we do now?
1042
01:22:17,130 --> 01:22:18,791
I got it.
1043
01:22:25,305 --> 01:22:29,674
Puss and Donkey, baby!
Once again, come on!
1044
01:22:29,810 --> 01:22:34,440
I want to thank you for letting me
be myself
1045
01:22:34,581 --> 01:22:35,673
Again!
1046
01:22:35,816 --> 01:22:37,681
Look at my hips!
1047
01:22:37,818 --> 01:22:43,017
I want to thank you for letting me
be myself
1048
01:22:43,156 --> 01:22:44,646
Again!
1049
01:22:49,930 --> 01:22:51,454
- Break it down!
- Let's go!
1050
01:22:51,598 --> 01:22:53,998
Stiff all in the collar
1051
01:22:55,836 --> 01:22:57,997
Fluffy in the face
1052
01:23:00,173 --> 01:23:02,664
Chit chat chatter trying
1053
01:23:04,011 --> 01:23:06,172
Stuffy in the place
1054
01:23:08,348 --> 01:23:11,181
Thank you for the par-tay
1055
01:23:12,352 --> 01:23:14,217
But I could never stay
1056
01:23:14,354 --> 01:23:15,685
I'm sorry.
1057
01:23:16,356 --> 01:23:19,348
I got many things on my mind
1058
01:23:20,694 --> 01:23:22,855
But the word's in the way
1059
01:23:23,864 --> 01:23:29,063
And I want to thank you for letting me
be myself
1060
01:23:29,202 --> 01:23:30,533
Again
1061
01:23:31,538 --> 01:23:33,506
Different strokes for different folks
1062
01:23:33,640 --> 01:23:37,235
Thank you for letting me be myself
1063
01:23:37,377 --> 01:23:38,867
Again
1064
01:23:41,048 --> 01:23:42,538
Break it down!
1065
01:23:43,550 --> 01:23:46,713
Puss and Donkey, baby!
Puss and Donkey, baby!
1066
01:23:47,220 --> 01:23:48,881
Puss and Donkey, baby!
1067
01:23:50,223 --> 01:23:52,384
Dance to the music
1068
01:23:54,227 --> 01:23:56,559
All night long
1069
01:23:58,565 --> 01:24:00,897
Everyday people
1070
01:24:02,569 --> 01:24:04,730
Sing a simple song
1071
01:24:06,740 --> 01:24:09,231
Mama's so happy
1072
01:24:11,078 --> 01:24:13,069
Mama start to cry
1073
01:24:15,248 --> 01:24:17,739
Papa's still singing
1074
01:24:18,919 --> 01:24:22,411
You can make it if you try
So try!
1075
01:24:23,590 --> 01:24:27,458
Thank you for letting me be myself
1076
01:24:27,594 --> 01:24:28,925
Again
1077
01:24:31,932 --> 01:24:35,800
Thank you for letting me be myself
1078
01:24:35,936 --> 01:24:37,631
Again
1079
01:24:37,771 --> 01:24:40,638
Oome on, Donkey. Do something right!
1080
01:24:40,774 --> 01:24:43,174
Put the hoofs together!
Put the hoofs together!
1081
01:24:44,277 --> 01:24:48,475
Stomp your boots, baby! Stomp your
boots, baby! Stomp your boots, baby!
1082
01:24:48,615 --> 01:24:52,483
Thank you for letting me be myself
1083
01:24:52,619 --> 01:24:54,109
Again
1084
01:24:56,289 --> 01:25:00,817
I want to thank you for letting me
be myself
1085
01:25:00,961 --> 01:25:02,053
Again
1086
01:25:02,195 --> 01:25:05,164
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
1087
01:25:05,298 --> 01:25:08,495
Want to thank you
Just to be my
1088
01:25:08,635 --> 01:25:11,502
Because I just want to be my...
See?
1089
01:25:11,638 --> 01:25:14,334
Can I, can I thank you!
Can I
1090
01:25:14,474 --> 01:25:16,305
Yes! Yes!
79978
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