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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:36,730 --> 00:01:38,866 Excuse me, miss. Is everything alright? 2 00:01:38,899 --> 00:01:40,734 Oh, yes, Mr Dowling. 3 00:01:40,768 --> 00:01:44,405 Um, I'm just taking notes on your circa-1970s cornicing 4 00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:48,075 and the silver hardware on your tootalie-wootalie. 5 00:01:58,286 --> 00:01:59,820 Mm-hm. 6 00:02:05,092 --> 00:02:06,460 -Swimmer? -Swimmer. 7 00:02:06,494 --> 00:02:08,061 -Is she? Yeah! -Yeah. 8 00:02:08,095 --> 00:02:09,430 She looks like it. 9 00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:11,599 -Shoulders. -Yes. Classic. 10 00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:12,966 Ohh! 11 00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:15,436 Oh, she was a beautiful dog. 12 00:02:15,469 --> 00:02:17,605 -Oh, yeah. 13 00:02:17,638 --> 00:02:19,207 Oh... 14 00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:21,875 Well, "Storms make trees take deeper roots." 15 00:02:21,909 --> 00:02:24,111 Oh, it's just a little Dolly Parton saying 16 00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:25,479 that I find helpful. 17 00:02:25,513 --> 00:02:26,980 -Oh, thank you. -Yeah. 18 00:02:27,014 --> 00:02:29,583 What, so the... the roots nestle in? 19 00:02:29,617 --> 00:02:30,984 Yeah. 20 00:02:31,018 --> 00:02:33,153 Yeah, like, um, you know... 21 00:02:33,187 --> 00:02:34,988 -And the trunk thickens up? -Yeah, yeah. 22 00:02:35,022 --> 00:02:37,225 Yeah, I like that. 23 00:02:37,258 --> 00:02:40,894 Ooh, um, uh... 24 00:02:40,928 --> 00:02:44,432 You've got a lovely two-bed, one-bath, one-car time warp. 25 00:02:44,465 --> 00:02:48,436 -And I have valued it highly. 26 00:02:48,469 --> 00:02:51,171 So you will definitely get your refinancing for your family. 27 00:02:51,205 --> 00:02:53,407 -Thank you. -Mm-hm. Look, I've gotta go. 28 00:02:53,441 --> 00:02:54,742 I've just... 29 00:02:54,775 --> 00:02:56,310 I've got a big office party tonight 30 00:02:56,344 --> 00:02:58,312 and I've gotta get dolled up and, you know... 31 00:02:58,346 --> 00:03:00,314 But thank you so much for sharing your life story. 32 00:03:00,348 --> 00:03:02,416 It was my whole life story. 33 00:03:02,450 --> 00:03:03,684 Yeah, it really was. 34 00:03:03,717 --> 00:03:05,919 -It's cathartic, sharing. -Yep. 35 00:03:26,674 --> 00:03:28,776 Franny, I'm going to have to meet you in there. 36 00:03:28,809 --> 00:03:30,378 I've only just finished my last valuation. 37 00:03:30,411 --> 00:03:32,346 It's dress-up! You know you've gotta dress up. 38 00:03:32,380 --> 00:03:33,947 I know! Yeah, I know, I know. 39 00:03:33,981 --> 00:03:36,049 -Well, who are you coming as? -Who do you think? 40 00:03:36,083 --> 00:03:38,185 -Are you OK, Red? 41 00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:40,220 Well, it's just I can't run! 42 00:03:40,254 --> 00:03:42,055 My fitness is just not up there. 43 00:03:42,089 --> 00:03:43,591 Oh! 44 00:04:36,910 --> 00:04:38,446 Whoops! 45 00:05:10,344 --> 00:05:12,480 Turn around. Just turn around and leave. 46 00:05:12,513 --> 00:05:14,782 -Hello, Dolly. -G'day. 47 00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:16,316 Hmm. 48 00:05:16,350 --> 00:05:18,919 Francis? 49 00:05:21,822 --> 00:05:23,491 I'm gonna kill you. 50 00:05:23,524 --> 00:05:25,258 I don't want to be a joke, Franny. 51 00:05:25,292 --> 00:05:27,895 I want to be taken seriously, for swear-word's-sake! 52 00:05:27,928 --> 00:05:30,798 I can't get anywhere when I look ridiculous! 53 00:05:30,831 --> 00:05:32,833 OK, well, the outfit doesn't help that. 54 00:05:32,866 --> 00:05:34,668 Oh, come on, Red. Loosen up! 55 00:05:34,702 --> 00:05:37,938 Don't tell me to loosen up. I am loose, I am loose! 56 00:05:37,971 --> 00:05:39,306 I hate you right now. 57 00:05:39,339 --> 00:05:41,975 Well, do you want to sneak out of here? 58 00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:43,511 Well, I'm not a coward. 59 00:05:43,544 --> 00:05:45,345 OK, so what are we doing? 60 00:05:47,280 --> 00:05:49,116 Come on. 61 00:05:49,149 --> 00:05:51,018 How do you feel? 62 00:05:51,051 --> 00:05:55,088 Well...before you killed me, 63 00:05:55,122 --> 00:05:57,758 I was feeling like a, you know, 64 00:05:57,791 --> 00:06:01,595 frothy, talented, successful Dolly Parton. 65 00:06:01,629 --> 00:06:03,296 OK, everybody, everybody! 66 00:06:03,330 --> 00:06:05,165 Welcome to the Presley Property Awards! 67 00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:07,367 And first up, a very special guest, 68 00:06:07,401 --> 00:06:10,438 the king himself, Elvis! 69 00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:13,441 Alright. 70 00:06:13,474 --> 00:06:15,275 Ooh! 71 00:06:55,916 --> 00:06:57,350 Yes, yes! 72 00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:08,729 The most outstanding valuer is... 73 00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:09,997 ..Lionel! 74 00:07:10,030 --> 00:07:12,566 -Whoo-hoo! 75 00:07:13,634 --> 00:07:14,968 -Sorry, babe. -Whoo! 76 00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:18,205 Thank you! Thank you! 77 00:07:20,774 --> 00:07:22,610 -I'm gonna get that next year. -Mm. 78 00:07:22,643 --> 00:07:24,377 And the last award tonight 79 00:07:24,411 --> 00:07:26,847 is a crowd-pleaser, a bit of fun. 80 00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:28,716 She's had a wobbly start to the job, 81 00:07:28,749 --> 00:07:32,119 but I'm excited to announce the Office Clown Award goes to... 82 00:07:32,152 --> 00:07:34,221 ..Raylene 'Red' Delaney. 83 00:07:34,254 --> 00:07:36,189 -I didn't know about this bit. 84 00:07:36,223 --> 00:07:38,526 And tonight she didn't disappoint. 85 00:07:38,559 --> 00:07:40,528 Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo! 86 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:48,068 Hmph. 87 00:07:49,169 --> 00:07:51,204 -Oh, hello! 88 00:07:51,238 --> 00:07:53,807 -Taxi! 89 00:07:54,908 --> 00:07:56,409 Um... 90 00:07:56,443 --> 00:07:59,880 It's my first award ever. Huh! 91 00:07:59,913 --> 00:08:01,949 And I would like to thank my mum 92 00:08:01,982 --> 00:08:03,651 for giving me this clown head. 93 00:08:19,667 --> 00:08:22,636 Well, there are two kinds of people. 94 00:08:22,670 --> 00:08:25,272 Those who know how to have a good time... 95 00:08:26,473 --> 00:08:29,509 ..and those who are willin' to learn. 96 00:08:29,543 --> 00:08:32,345 For the second group, let me introduce myself. 97 00:08:32,379 --> 00:08:35,448 My name is Dolly and I'm your teacher. 98 00:08:35,482 --> 00:08:37,951 -Yee-ha! 99 00:08:39,319 --> 00:08:44,692 I'd like to invite our esteemed boss, Forbes Presley, 100 00:08:44,725 --> 00:08:48,295 up onto the dance floor with his beautiful wife. 101 00:08:50,197 --> 00:08:51,965 -Come on! -Come on! 102 00:08:53,567 --> 00:08:56,970 I'd like to sing a little somethin' for ya. 103 00:10:22,823 --> 00:10:25,258 Huh! Kenny Rogers! 104 00:10:26,226 --> 00:10:28,095 He's our most successful client. 105 00:10:29,129 --> 00:10:31,198 We're gearing up for his Australasia tour. 106 00:10:31,231 --> 00:10:33,433 Twin Palms Theatre, Hong Kong, etc. 107 00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:35,869 Oh, Twin Palms? My mum loves that theatre. 108 00:10:35,903 --> 00:10:37,437 It's pretty impressive. 109 00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:38,806 Well, if the show sells out, 110 00:10:38,839 --> 00:10:40,640 we'll go to the USA, which I'm gunning for. 111 00:10:40,674 --> 00:10:41,975 Are you? 112 00:10:44,144 --> 00:10:46,079 How long you been performin' Dolly? 113 00:10:46,113 --> 00:10:48,281 Oh, no. Golly, no. 114 00:10:48,315 --> 00:10:50,250 Just mucking around, but, um... 115 00:10:50,283 --> 00:10:52,319 Tonight was just an unfortunate mistake. 116 00:10:52,352 --> 00:10:53,653 Yeah, right. 117 00:10:53,687 --> 00:10:54,955 Well, it took guts. 118 00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:56,724 -Especially with those people. 119 00:10:56,757 --> 00:10:58,826 It's the bland leading the bland in there. 120 00:10:58,859 --> 00:11:00,293 No offence. 121 00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:11,604 -I thought you did alright. -Cheers. 122 00:11:11,638 --> 00:11:14,908 -I'd watch that one. 123 00:11:14,942 --> 00:11:18,145 Kenny's performing at the Tamworth Country Music Festival. 124 00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:21,148 -You should come. Bring Dolly. -Oh, no. 125 00:11:21,181 --> 00:11:24,151 You know, only if you liked being an unfortunate mistake. 126 00:11:29,556 --> 00:11:31,191 Night. 127 00:11:36,296 --> 00:11:37,664 Welcome to my own 128 00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:38,832 little Tennessee cabin. 129 00:11:38,866 --> 00:11:41,468 Come here, baby. Come on. Come on. 130 00:11:48,541 --> 00:11:50,577 -Come on. 131 00:11:51,745 --> 00:11:53,146 OK. 132 00:11:57,350 --> 00:11:59,319 -Darlin' Dolly. -Yeah? 133 00:11:59,352 --> 00:12:03,056 -You're a straight-up fantasy. -Oh! OK. 134 00:12:07,861 --> 00:12:10,663 I gotta be honest with you, Dolly. 135 00:12:10,697 --> 00:12:13,400 -I hate these orange pants. -Oh. 136 00:12:13,433 --> 00:12:16,469 Take 'em off, you'd be close to perfection. 137 00:12:16,503 --> 00:12:19,239 -Yeah, OK. -Ah! Shh, shh. 138 00:12:19,272 --> 00:12:20,941 As Dolly. 139 00:12:22,509 --> 00:12:25,078 Oh, howdy-doody. 140 00:12:25,112 --> 00:12:27,380 Well, my pants are comin' off. 141 00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:32,352 Bathroom. Back in a sec. 142 00:12:54,975 --> 00:12:56,409 -Raylene! -Oh! 143 00:12:56,443 --> 00:12:58,611 Not on my beautiful grass! 144 00:12:59,579 --> 00:13:01,048 Ohh! 145 00:13:05,252 --> 00:13:06,786 Who was that? 146 00:13:06,820 --> 00:13:08,788 Elvis Presley. 147 00:13:08,822 --> 00:13:11,258 Oh, it was that good, was it? 148 00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:13,861 Ma, please stop locking me out. 149 00:13:13,894 --> 00:13:16,196 It's one o'clock in the morning! 150 00:13:16,229 --> 00:13:18,498 You chose to live in the garage! 151 00:13:19,466 --> 00:13:21,268 Bloody ridiculous. 152 00:13:49,596 --> 00:13:51,764 There are two kinds of people. 153 00:13:51,798 --> 00:13:55,035 Those who know how to have a good time... 154 00:13:56,103 --> 00:14:00,307 ..and those who are just trying. 155 00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:21,694 -Mum! 156 00:14:21,728 --> 00:14:23,196 Put your gown on! 157 00:14:25,132 --> 00:14:27,000 Nothing wrong with being comfortable 158 00:14:27,034 --> 00:14:29,202 in your skin, darling, 159 00:14:29,236 --> 00:14:31,771 au naturel. 160 00:14:31,804 --> 00:14:35,342 I just wish I looked a little bit more professional. 161 00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:39,812 You are a beautiful sunburnt mushroom. 162 00:14:40,813 --> 00:14:42,615 Um, thanks, Mum. 163 00:14:42,649 --> 00:14:46,653 It's not what I'm going for, but...thanks. 164 00:14:49,422 --> 00:14:51,191 Hurry up! 165 00:15:01,568 --> 00:15:04,337 You're late. Hopeless! 166 00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:15,148 I mean, look at her. 167 00:15:15,182 --> 00:15:17,784 All that nylon. It'll make your snatch sick. 168 00:15:18,885 --> 00:15:21,554 Well, they say natural perfection isn't everything. 169 00:15:21,588 --> 00:15:24,324 Um, perfection is a bitch. And do we have to be beautiful? 170 00:15:24,357 --> 00:15:27,027 Because it's not easy and it's not my preference. 171 00:15:30,363 --> 00:15:33,566 -Could I get a word, Raylene? -Yes, you may. 172 00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:36,069 I'll just get my... ..cup of ambition. 173 00:15:37,870 --> 00:15:40,440 -So... -Who do you remind me of? 174 00:15:40,473 --> 00:15:41,908 Scarlett Johansson. 175 00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:43,576 No. 176 00:15:48,982 --> 00:15:51,284 Raylene, I, uh...I have grounds 177 00:15:51,318 --> 00:15:53,553 to fire you for sexual harassment. 178 00:15:55,622 --> 00:15:56,856 Sorry? 179 00:15:56,889 --> 00:15:58,791 Sexual harassment. 180 00:16:11,071 --> 00:16:13,606 -'Cause I was touching crotches? -Many. 181 00:16:15,742 --> 00:16:17,577 #MeToo, too many crotches. 182 00:16:21,681 --> 00:16:24,651 I'm sorry. I...I've got this impulse control problem. 183 00:16:24,684 --> 00:16:26,919 No, it's not just about last night, Raylene. 184 00:16:26,953 --> 00:16:29,389 Your behaviour has been inappropriate 185 00:16:29,422 --> 00:16:31,458 prior to last night also. 186 00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:33,826 See, you're not bad at putting a value on a property. 187 00:16:33,860 --> 00:16:35,462 It's just the whole rest of the job 188 00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:37,297 that you're a mess. 189 00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:39,599 You know, in business you need to be 190 00:16:39,632 --> 00:16:43,103 a shiny, professional house-and-land package 191 00:16:43,136 --> 00:16:44,504 and you're like a, uh... 192 00:16:44,537 --> 00:16:46,739 -Converted garage? -Yes. 193 00:16:46,773 --> 00:16:49,976 Honestly, you don't really fit in in any office, Red. 194 00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:52,945 I mean, you're late every single day. 195 00:16:52,979 --> 00:16:56,449 You lost your driver's licence when half the job is driving 196 00:16:56,483 --> 00:16:58,951 and you had whisky with that little old lady at the auction. 197 00:16:58,985 --> 00:17:00,420 But she was so lonely! 198 00:17:00,453 --> 00:17:02,122 She hadn't spoken to anyone in two weeks! 199 00:17:02,155 --> 00:17:05,125 If you want to stay here, you need to shut down. 200 00:17:05,158 --> 00:17:07,594 -Shut myself down? -Mm-hm, yep. 201 00:17:07,627 --> 00:17:09,162 Tuck yourself in. 202 00:17:12,899 --> 00:17:16,002 OK, it's too much copper, which is why we're red 203 00:17:16,035 --> 00:17:18,371 and why we hardly charge and why we bleed lots. 204 00:17:18,405 --> 00:17:20,006 It's like bed them or bury them alive 205 00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:21,108 is what the ancient Egyptians... 206 00:17:21,141 --> 00:17:22,709 I don't care about your hair, Red. 207 00:17:22,742 --> 00:17:24,244 Please, Forbes. 208 00:17:25,645 --> 00:17:27,614 I can fit in. 209 00:17:27,647 --> 00:17:30,383 And I can tuck in. I can tuck right in. 210 00:17:30,417 --> 00:17:32,385 And I'd never bring up the size of your cock. 211 00:17:32,419 --> 00:17:33,886 You're fired. 212 00:17:33,920 --> 00:17:35,522 You're like the love child of Mick Hucknall 213 00:17:35,555 --> 00:17:37,390 and Ronald McDonald if they banged. 214 00:17:37,424 --> 00:17:39,892 -I quit! -Excuse me? 215 00:17:39,926 --> 00:17:42,229 This is a circus and you're the freak! 216 00:17:42,262 --> 00:17:44,197 You can't fire me because I quit! 217 00:17:44,231 --> 00:17:46,399 -Oh! -Shi... Oh! 218 00:17:46,433 --> 00:17:48,201 -Oooh! 219 00:17:48,235 --> 00:17:49,569 Ohh! 220 00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:52,839 Tuck that shit in! 221 00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:47,820 -I love you! 222 00:19:47,854 --> 00:19:50,590 Come back to my room. I love you! 223 00:19:56,296 --> 00:19:57,730 Thanks a lot. 224 00:19:59,566 --> 00:20:01,501 And this one. This one's for Trudy. 225 00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:05,037 -And this one too! 226 00:20:08,875 --> 00:20:10,610 Dolly. Where do I start? 227 00:20:10,643 --> 00:20:12,979 I mean she's old-school, but she's new-school relevant. 228 00:20:13,012 --> 00:20:15,348 -Mm. -She's funny and successful. 229 00:20:15,382 --> 00:20:17,216 And smart and talented. 230 00:20:17,250 --> 00:20:20,219 But she's heart-breaking and she's a poet, 231 00:20:20,253 --> 00:20:22,054 but she knows who she is, you know? 232 00:20:22,088 --> 00:20:24,657 She's just like that little bit of hope 233 00:20:24,691 --> 00:20:27,494 holding up humanity or at least my humanity. 234 00:20:28,895 --> 00:20:30,697 Why are you 'Teeth'? 235 00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:32,299 -Real name's Annie. -Oh. 236 00:20:32,332 --> 00:20:34,033 But I got my nickname 237 00:20:34,066 --> 00:20:36,336 'cause I had a sack of teeth growing in my ovaries. 238 00:20:39,372 --> 00:20:40,707 Every time. 239 00:20:40,740 --> 00:20:43,310 -What?! 240 00:20:43,343 --> 00:20:46,479 Hey, we're casting for a new Dolly at the moment 241 00:20:46,513 --> 00:20:50,817 for Kenny's show to boost his image and ticket sales 242 00:20:50,850 --> 00:20:54,721 and I'm submittin' you as my number one. 243 00:20:54,754 --> 00:20:56,088 What? 244 00:20:56,122 --> 00:20:57,657 There's a Dolly stand-up gig on tonight. 245 00:20:57,690 --> 00:20:59,726 -Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa. -Yeah. Come on. 246 00:20:59,759 --> 00:21:01,328 -Oh. -It's gonna be a tough crowd. 247 00:21:01,361 --> 00:21:02,962 Let's see what you're made of. 248 00:21:11,738 --> 00:21:14,173 Oh, wow. Alright. 249 00:21:14,206 --> 00:21:16,409 Yeah, make-up's a little extra. 250 00:21:16,443 --> 00:21:18,778 Thanks, Tay-Tay, you squeaky mouse. 251 00:21:18,811 --> 00:21:20,747 You said do my best. Best. 252 00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:22,715 Oh, no. Oh, no! 253 00:21:22,749 --> 00:21:24,717 -Is it too much? Is it too much? -No, look. 254 00:21:24,751 --> 00:21:26,218 It's...it's...it's fine. 255 00:21:26,252 --> 00:21:29,088 It's...it's fine. We don't have time. 256 00:21:29,121 --> 00:21:31,023 Plus, Kenny's here. 257 00:21:31,057 --> 00:21:32,792 Don't worry. You don't have to sing. 258 00:21:32,825 --> 00:21:34,461 Just, um, banter. 259 00:21:34,494 --> 00:21:36,529 I don't think this is such a good idea. 260 00:21:36,563 --> 00:21:38,531 -I feel carsick. -No, listen. Come on. 261 00:21:38,565 --> 00:21:40,266 Remember, it's about the audience 262 00:21:40,299 --> 00:21:41,968 and their nostalgia, right? 263 00:21:42,001 --> 00:21:44,537 It is more about them and less about you. 264 00:21:44,571 --> 00:21:45,605 -OK. -Yeah? 265 00:21:45,638 --> 00:21:46,906 Like you did at that office party. 266 00:21:46,939 --> 00:21:48,375 Unless you wanna go back to a boring nine-to-five. 267 00:21:48,408 --> 00:21:49,609 I really don't, I really don't. 268 00:21:49,642 --> 00:21:50,910 No, 'cause you'd neck yourself, mate. 269 00:21:50,943 --> 00:21:52,979 -And I'd probably help you. -Thank you. 270 00:21:53,012 --> 00:21:54,246 -Now... -Thanks. 271 00:21:54,280 --> 00:21:55,615 ..let me look at you. 272 00:21:56,916 --> 00:21:59,419 Well, mate, you're a bit of a hot mess. 273 00:21:59,452 --> 00:22:01,388 But the time is now. 274 00:22:01,421 --> 00:22:04,290 -OK. -Pony up. You can do it. 275 00:22:04,323 --> 00:22:06,125 That a girl. 276 00:22:25,478 --> 00:22:28,080 Welcome, Dolly! 277 00:22:29,782 --> 00:22:31,217 Best of luck. 278 00:22:33,185 --> 00:22:34,687 Howdy. 279 00:22:36,122 --> 00:22:37,657 I've gotta be honest. 280 00:22:37,690 --> 00:22:39,325 This is my first time properly. 281 00:22:39,358 --> 00:22:40,793 We'll be gentle! 282 00:22:40,827 --> 00:22:42,495 -Howdy, darling! 283 00:22:43,830 --> 00:22:45,331 Well, look at you all! 284 00:22:45,364 --> 00:22:46,599 Thanks, Doll. 285 00:22:46,633 --> 00:22:48,501 We'd rather be looked at than overlooked! 286 00:22:59,011 --> 00:23:00,680 Well, I really... 287 00:23:00,713 --> 00:23:04,050 ..I really patterned my look from a serious place, 288 00:23:04,083 --> 00:23:06,152 from a country girl's idea of glamour 289 00:23:06,185 --> 00:23:08,521 after what they called the "town tramp". 290 00:23:11,357 --> 00:23:13,025 In a country town, a mountain town, 291 00:23:13,059 --> 00:23:14,961 there's always a few loose women. 292 00:23:14,994 --> 00:23:16,729 That's me! 293 00:23:16,763 --> 00:23:19,699 And she had this beautiful peroxide hair 294 00:23:19,732 --> 00:23:22,702 piled on her head, red nails, high-heel shoes 295 00:23:22,735 --> 00:23:25,404 and I just thought she was the prettiest thing I've ever seen. 296 00:23:27,039 --> 00:23:30,042 But my momma, she said, "She ain't nothin' but trash." 297 00:23:30,076 --> 00:23:32,712 And I thought, "That's what I wanna be, Momma. 298 00:23:32,745 --> 00:23:34,013 "I want to be trash!" 299 00:23:36,783 --> 00:23:38,518 Opinionated mommas, we've all got 'em, 300 00:23:38,551 --> 00:23:39,919 burnin' in our ears. 301 00:23:41,187 --> 00:23:43,255 But thank you so much for listening, boys. 302 00:23:43,289 --> 00:23:44,824 One piece of advice. 303 00:23:44,857 --> 00:23:47,894 Always act like it's rainin' and wear your rubbers! 304 00:23:53,299 --> 00:23:54,667 Thank you and goodnight! 305 00:23:57,103 --> 00:23:58,671 -Doll. -Hey! 306 00:23:58,705 --> 00:24:02,008 I may look like a man, but inside I'm a lady. 307 00:24:02,041 --> 00:24:05,612 -Whoo-hoo! 308 00:24:05,645 --> 00:24:07,614 Hey, you did pretty good! 309 00:24:07,647 --> 00:24:09,448 Hey, who's that guy with Kenny? 310 00:24:09,482 --> 00:24:11,017 He looks like Neil Diamond. 311 00:24:11,050 --> 00:24:12,919 That's my boss, Wilson Stone. 312 00:24:12,952 --> 00:24:14,621 He runs Genuine Copy Management. 313 00:24:14,654 --> 00:24:16,589 -I didn't want to freak you out. -I freaked anyway. 314 00:24:16,623 --> 00:24:18,390 -I mean, I freaked! -No, but you were fine. 315 00:24:18,424 --> 00:24:19,726 I've gotta get Kenny to the hotel. 316 00:24:19,759 --> 00:24:21,227 -But make sure you call me. -I will. 317 00:24:21,260 --> 00:24:22,595 -You did well. -Thanks. 318 00:24:22,629 --> 00:24:24,230 I need a drink. 319 00:24:24,263 --> 00:24:27,099 Hey, Franny, I'm staying at this motel 320 00:24:27,133 --> 00:24:29,368 with this huge golden guitar... 321 00:24:29,401 --> 00:24:30,770 -Hey! -Thank you, Dolly. 322 00:24:30,803 --> 00:24:32,238 ..this huge golden guitar out the front 323 00:24:32,271 --> 00:24:33,773 and I just performed as Dolly, 324 00:24:33,806 --> 00:24:35,307 but I didn't touch any crotches. 325 00:24:35,341 --> 00:24:38,611 And I've got this new friend who grew teeth in her ovaries. 326 00:24:38,645 --> 00:24:41,313 OK. See you. Bye. 327 00:24:58,965 --> 00:25:00,533 Come in. 328 00:25:03,836 --> 00:25:05,605 Buddy! 329 00:25:05,638 --> 00:25:08,575 You get fired from work, you're five hours out of town 330 00:25:08,608 --> 00:25:10,677 with a woman with teeth in her vagina? 331 00:25:10,710 --> 00:25:13,580 Call me crazy, but terror ran through my brain. 332 00:25:13,613 --> 00:25:15,615 You're a silly, billy, willy, villy. 333 00:25:15,648 --> 00:25:18,517 Get up. 334 00:25:18,551 --> 00:25:20,252 Help me. 335 00:25:20,286 --> 00:25:21,688 Yep, yep. That's good, that's good. 336 00:25:21,721 --> 00:25:23,489 Come on, Red. Get in the shower. 337 00:25:23,522 --> 00:25:25,858 Yep, yep, yep, yep. Oh, my feet! 338 00:25:27,126 --> 00:25:29,929 This drag queen had the prettiest boob job. 339 00:25:29,962 --> 00:25:31,631 -Do not get bolt-ons! -I'm just saying... 340 00:25:31,664 --> 00:25:33,733 I'm just saying, what a professional. 341 00:25:37,036 --> 00:25:39,606 I smell Sunday roast chicken! 342 00:25:39,639 --> 00:25:41,674 It's hormone-free! 343 00:25:42,642 --> 00:25:44,210 Can't have my men growing breasts. 344 00:25:44,243 --> 00:25:45,645 -Red, hi. -Hey, Gramps. 345 00:25:45,678 --> 00:25:47,113 -Mwah! -Darlin'. 346 00:25:47,146 --> 00:25:48,648 Ooh! Bathroom. 347 00:25:50,049 --> 00:25:51,450 Where have you been? 348 00:25:51,483 --> 00:25:54,553 Francis's couch. 349 00:25:54,587 --> 00:25:56,723 Just 'cause you're old enough doesn't mean that I've... 350 00:25:56,756 --> 00:25:58,658 ..stopped being your mum. 351 00:25:58,691 --> 00:26:02,161 Oh, Franny, did you win that award, darling? 352 00:26:02,194 --> 00:26:03,696 -I forgot to ask. 353 00:26:03,730 --> 00:26:05,531 -Nope. -Maybe next year. 354 00:26:05,564 --> 00:26:08,067 Or Red might even get the award. 355 00:26:08,100 --> 00:26:09,902 -I will. -You got fired. 356 00:26:09,936 --> 00:26:12,839 You got fired? 357 00:26:12,872 --> 00:26:15,341 -Again? -I didn't. Mum, calm down. 358 00:26:15,374 --> 00:26:18,711 Well, it's not exactly soothing information. 359 00:26:18,745 --> 00:26:21,013 It's nothing. It's just a career glitch. 360 00:26:21,047 --> 00:26:23,850 Oh, sorry, Red quit. She quit. 361 00:26:23,883 --> 00:26:26,653 You got fired and quit, but in the same day? 362 00:26:26,686 --> 00:26:28,320 Well, that's new. 363 00:26:28,354 --> 00:26:31,824 You know, in all my career, I have never lost a job. 364 00:26:31,858 --> 00:26:34,360 I've always been a high achiever. 365 00:26:34,393 --> 00:26:38,765 I've had rounds of IVF and then being a single mum, 366 00:26:38,798 --> 00:26:41,400 very creative. 367 00:26:41,433 --> 00:26:44,603 I've managed to have my cake, decorate it and eat it, 368 00:26:44,637 --> 00:26:46,072 so to speak, hm? 369 00:26:46,105 --> 00:26:49,541 I just boggle at...you. 370 00:26:49,575 --> 00:26:54,413 I know! You can work with me at the Royal Blind Society. 371 00:26:54,446 --> 00:26:57,784 You could move back in here, we can rent out the garage... 372 00:26:57,817 --> 00:26:59,786 Mum, I'm not moving back in here. 373 00:26:59,819 --> 00:27:02,354 -I'm perfectly capable myself. -Are you? 374 00:27:02,388 --> 00:27:05,157 'Cause I'd say it's been quite the journey so far. 375 00:27:06,558 --> 00:27:08,094 What are you going to do? 376 00:27:10,830 --> 00:27:12,598 Well, I'll tell you. She is going... 377 00:27:12,631 --> 00:27:13,966 Mm! 378 00:27:15,334 --> 00:27:18,237 She's gonna tell you that Franny and I are dating. 379 00:27:19,438 --> 00:27:20,940 See? Partner, Mum. 380 00:27:20,973 --> 00:27:22,942 -Ticked that box. -Oh! Oh! 381 00:27:22,975 --> 00:27:24,210 That's the news to focus on. 382 00:27:24,243 --> 00:27:27,213 Ohh, my darlings! 383 00:27:27,246 --> 00:27:28,781 I know! 384 00:27:28,815 --> 00:27:30,717 Ha ha ha! 385 00:27:30,750 --> 00:27:32,418 Ohh! 386 00:27:36,355 --> 00:27:37,957 Where are you going? 387 00:27:37,990 --> 00:27:39,826 Obviously to yours. 388 00:27:39,859 --> 00:27:43,062 I just need a frickin' minute, just a minute, 389 00:27:43,095 --> 00:27:45,331 to work out me and my career thing 390 00:27:45,364 --> 00:27:47,133 without everyone's 50 cents. 391 00:27:49,035 --> 00:27:53,005 So Dolly... is moving in with you. 392 00:27:55,842 --> 00:27:57,744 -Ooh! -Ohh. 393 00:27:57,777 --> 00:28:00,446 She's brash, she's bubbly, 394 00:28:00,479 --> 00:28:01,981 real forward. 395 00:28:03,315 --> 00:28:04,650 Nipples to the sky. 396 00:28:05,718 --> 00:28:07,319 And be confident! 397 00:28:15,527 --> 00:28:17,163 Three bras does the trick. 398 00:28:17,196 --> 00:28:19,698 Hello, Kenny. My name is Dolly. 399 00:28:21,000 --> 00:28:23,535 Kenny, you're so hot. 400 00:28:23,569 --> 00:28:25,137 I will always love you. 401 00:28:25,171 --> 00:28:27,940 Oh, man, she's hard. Dolly's so hard. 402 00:28:27,974 --> 00:28:31,143 I will love you too if you keep your ass so tight. 403 00:28:31,177 --> 00:28:34,113 Should have gone with Britney Spears or something. 404 00:28:34,146 --> 00:28:36,849 Ooh! Cool Bowie! 405 00:28:41,020 --> 00:28:43,522 The Teeth is taking me to this secret club 406 00:28:43,555 --> 00:28:45,792 and hopefully I'll win over her boss somehow 407 00:28:45,825 --> 00:28:47,994 and he'll take me on as Kenny's Dolly. 408 00:28:48,027 --> 00:28:51,163 OK, so just a reminder that your track record with bosses 409 00:28:51,197 --> 00:28:53,532 or any authority ever is not great. 410 00:28:53,565 --> 00:28:56,068 So try and be a bit more Dolly 411 00:28:56,102 --> 00:28:57,970 and less Red when negotiating 412 00:28:58,004 --> 00:28:59,906 or even charming him 413 00:28:59,939 --> 00:29:01,707 'cause you're gonna need cash to pay off 414 00:29:01,740 --> 00:29:03,409 the credit debt you just cranked up. 415 00:29:03,442 --> 00:29:06,512 Yeah, well, big stars of the copy world make good coin. 416 00:29:06,545 --> 00:29:09,181 This isn't a game to me. This is business. 417 00:29:11,117 --> 00:29:12,384 Franny, can you help me? 418 00:29:12,418 --> 00:29:14,220 I can't do anything with these nails. 419 00:29:14,253 --> 00:29:15,922 Oh, just... 420 00:29:17,689 --> 00:29:19,325 Yeah. 421 00:29:19,358 --> 00:29:21,060 Here. 422 00:29:21,093 --> 00:29:23,362 My name is Dolly. Ain't you cute? 423 00:29:23,395 --> 00:29:25,097 -Ain't you sweet? Ain't you... -Is this right? 424 00:29:25,131 --> 00:29:27,099 Yeah. Can you do it up? 425 00:29:28,467 --> 00:29:30,269 Hurry, Franny. Come on. I'm running late. 426 00:29:31,237 --> 00:29:33,239 -And I got it. 427 00:29:33,272 --> 00:29:35,842 OK. How do I look? 428 00:29:35,875 --> 00:29:38,978 Ain't you a squeezy bag of peaches? 429 00:29:40,412 --> 00:29:41,547 OK. 430 00:30:16,115 --> 00:30:17,884 I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry I'm late. 431 00:30:17,917 --> 00:30:19,618 I'll have to knock that out of you 432 00:30:19,651 --> 00:30:21,553 'cause my time is no less valuable than yours, alright? 433 00:30:21,587 --> 00:30:23,122 And ease up on the 'sorry's. 434 00:30:23,155 --> 00:30:25,291 Dolly would do one tough 'sorry' and that's it. 435 00:30:25,324 --> 00:30:27,293 Sorry. 436 00:30:28,594 --> 00:30:30,229 Cool. 437 00:30:30,262 --> 00:30:32,231 -Ready to be Dolly? -Yeah. 438 00:30:33,866 --> 00:30:36,068 -That wig is so much better. -Thanks. 439 00:30:36,102 --> 00:30:38,971 You get one shot with Wilson, so don't mess it up, OK? 440 00:30:40,139 --> 00:30:41,908 It's cocktail hour 441 00:30:41,941 --> 00:30:45,644 with the one and only Miss Ton Vee! 442 00:31:12,471 --> 00:31:15,007 I told you I've got a Streisand back in the States. 443 00:31:15,041 --> 00:31:16,508 I don't need another, darling. 444 00:31:16,542 --> 00:31:18,877 Sorry to interrupt. Dolly, this is Wilson. 445 00:31:18,911 --> 00:31:21,613 Wilson, Dolly performed in Tamworth, remember? 446 00:31:21,647 --> 00:31:23,382 In...in drag. 447 00:31:25,317 --> 00:31:28,887 Take me back to Vegas with you, Neil Diamond. 448 00:31:30,056 --> 00:31:31,390 Mwah! 449 00:31:32,524 --> 00:31:34,994 Always with the kiss. 450 00:31:40,933 --> 00:31:42,734 Two, two. 451 00:32:00,252 --> 00:32:02,554 'I Will Always Love You'. 452 00:32:03,922 --> 00:32:05,457 Really? 453 00:32:06,892 --> 00:32:08,860 Good move not selling that song to Elvis 454 00:32:08,894 --> 00:32:11,363 and making a packet with Whitney Houston. 455 00:32:24,076 --> 00:32:25,211 Ladies and gentlemen, 456 00:32:25,244 --> 00:32:26,945 keep that applause going 457 00:32:26,979 --> 00:32:29,215 for your favourite master of ceremonies, 458 00:32:29,248 --> 00:32:32,351 the one, the only, Elvis! 459 00:32:36,989 --> 00:32:38,457 -Come here, baby. -Mmm! 460 00:32:38,490 --> 00:32:39,925 Come on. 461 00:32:39,958 --> 00:32:41,260 -Oh! 462 00:32:42,661 --> 00:32:46,465 Isn't she a sweetie? Miss Ton Vee! 463 00:32:46,498 --> 00:32:49,035 Could I have another round of applause for her, please? 464 00:32:52,004 --> 00:32:55,874 Oh, hello, Norma Jean. 465 00:32:55,907 --> 00:32:57,543 -Oh! -Later? 466 00:32:57,576 --> 00:32:59,878 We've got a fabulous show for you here tonight. 467 00:32:59,911 --> 00:33:01,880 We're gonna be following up with Lady Gaga... 468 00:33:05,184 --> 00:33:06,652 ..and Miss Amy Winehouse, 469 00:33:06,685 --> 00:33:08,387 so please hang onto your drinks, your wares. 470 00:33:08,420 --> 00:33:09,588 I'll be right back. 471 00:33:09,621 --> 00:33:10,956 We're gonna have a great time tonight. 472 00:33:10,989 --> 00:33:12,324 Going to the ladies. 473 00:33:24,203 --> 00:33:27,005 Hey, Wilson! How's it goin'? 474 00:34:09,915 --> 00:34:12,584 -Shit! -You sound amazing. 475 00:34:13,719 --> 00:34:16,322 -I was trying... -I'm a woman, not a drag act. 476 00:34:16,355 --> 00:34:19,525 Good for you. I'll tell Kenny. He was wondering. 477 00:34:20,492 --> 00:34:22,161 I want to make a living doing this. 478 00:34:22,194 --> 00:34:25,063 You and every other tribute performer. 479 00:34:25,097 --> 00:34:26,998 Doesn't mean it's a good idea. 480 00:34:29,835 --> 00:34:31,703 Give me a chance. 481 00:34:31,737 --> 00:34:35,040 Whatever happened to a good old-fashioned chance? 482 00:34:35,073 --> 00:34:37,509 They got phased out in the '80s. 483 00:34:39,378 --> 00:34:42,047 I have genuine copies, 484 00:34:42,080 --> 00:34:44,350 not copies of copies. 485 00:34:45,951 --> 00:34:49,087 Do you breathe, sleep and eat Dolly? 486 00:34:49,121 --> 00:34:50,556 It's hard work, OK, 487 00:34:50,589 --> 00:34:54,426 from every small, demeaning gig to the biggest venues. 488 00:34:55,394 --> 00:34:57,229 And you strike me as someone 489 00:34:57,263 --> 00:34:59,965 who doesn't stick to things, right? 490 00:35:01,900 --> 00:35:03,802 Yeah. I thought so. 491 00:35:05,571 --> 00:35:07,873 This is where I belong. 492 00:35:07,906 --> 00:35:09,508 I feel at home here. 493 00:35:09,541 --> 00:35:12,844 This is what I'm supposed to be doing! 494 00:35:12,878 --> 00:35:15,914 I mean, I've idolised Dolly since I was a kid. 495 00:35:17,249 --> 00:35:19,251 Please, Wilson. 496 00:35:19,285 --> 00:35:20,886 -Man, please! -Hey! 497 00:35:22,154 --> 00:35:23,522 Dolly don't beg. 498 00:35:23,555 --> 00:35:25,557 No begging. Sorry. 499 00:35:25,591 --> 00:35:27,092 No sorrys. 500 00:35:28,059 --> 00:35:29,995 No sorrys, no beggin'. 501 00:35:34,333 --> 00:35:37,135 I would've been tall if I didn't get bunched up at the top. 502 00:35:56,855 --> 00:35:59,658 Poof! Poof! 503 00:35:59,691 --> 00:36:01,960 Hmph. 504 00:36:01,993 --> 00:36:04,496 Yeah, you're weird enough. I'll give you that. 505 00:36:04,530 --> 00:36:06,932 We need more Dollys in the world. 506 00:36:14,640 --> 00:36:15,941 Listen to me. 507 00:36:15,974 --> 00:36:18,610 I've got someone else in mind for Kenny's tour. 508 00:36:18,644 --> 00:36:20,045 But... 509 00:36:21,012 --> 00:36:22,748 ..I like the '80s 510 00:36:22,781 --> 00:36:24,416 so I'm gonna throw you a bone. 511 00:36:26,818 --> 00:36:28,254 Show me what you're made of. 512 00:36:34,360 --> 00:36:36,795 Hey, I grabbed your favourite power juice. 513 00:36:38,163 --> 00:36:41,099 Did I tell you I saw Katy Perry making out with Katy Perry? 514 00:36:41,132 --> 00:36:42,768 Well, I want to see the Katys! 515 00:36:42,801 --> 00:36:44,936 Not until I'm a pro and not at the club 516 00:36:44,970 --> 00:36:46,605 'cause you're not a copy or a manager 517 00:36:46,638 --> 00:36:48,507 or a celebrity. 518 00:36:48,540 --> 00:36:50,476 Yeah, you wouldn't fit in. 519 00:36:50,509 --> 00:36:53,512 These people are so wonderfully unique. 520 00:36:54,846 --> 00:36:56,315 Can you try and keep Dolly 521 00:36:56,348 --> 00:36:58,284 tucked in to just one corner of the house? 522 00:36:58,317 --> 00:37:00,386 -Don't wait up! 523 00:37:00,419 --> 00:37:01,987 -You're welcome. 524 00:37:04,723 --> 00:37:06,658 So you just stick to the script, yeah, 525 00:37:06,692 --> 00:37:08,126 honouring the incredible work 526 00:37:08,159 --> 00:37:09,661 of iconic Australian actor Jack Thompson. 527 00:37:09,695 --> 00:37:10,896 Then you sing your Jack song. 528 00:37:10,929 --> 00:37:12,230 -And then you're off. -Yeah. 529 00:37:12,264 --> 00:37:14,866 George, the Minogue sisters are stuck together. 530 00:37:15,934 --> 00:37:17,469 Hang on, Dannii! 531 00:37:17,503 --> 00:37:20,205 If I pull down and you pull sideways, it might work. 532 00:37:20,238 --> 00:37:22,341 Kylie and Dannii were supposed to do a spot 533 00:37:22,374 --> 00:37:24,376 with Elvis and introduce Dolly. 534 00:37:24,410 --> 00:37:25,977 Dolly, you buffer with Elvis. 535 00:37:26,011 --> 00:37:27,479 Remember, banter is your forte. 536 00:37:27,513 --> 00:37:30,081 No, no, I can't do that. I can't improvise. 537 00:37:30,115 --> 00:37:31,983 -Yes, you can. -I have to prepare. 538 00:37:32,017 --> 00:37:34,353 -Let's go. -What's... 539 00:37:34,386 --> 00:37:36,655 You two, I'm gonna push you out. 540 00:37:36,688 --> 00:37:38,857 There's gonna be a lot of people coming through here. 541 00:37:41,860 --> 00:37:43,228 Thank you very much. 542 00:37:43,261 --> 00:37:45,263 Thank you very much, everybody. Thank you very much. 543 00:37:45,297 --> 00:37:47,733 Who's wearing a wig now? Who's wearing a wig? 544 00:37:50,035 --> 00:37:52,203 Oh, Madonna, darlin', you look so pretty there. 545 00:37:52,237 --> 00:37:55,273 I'm just not so sure about your hair. 546 00:37:55,307 --> 00:37:57,676 You take it down, you'd be close to perfect. 547 00:37:57,709 --> 00:38:00,011 May I come down there and give you a kiss, ma'am? 548 00:38:00,045 --> 00:38:01,246 Thank you, ma'am. Thank you. 549 00:38:02,948 --> 00:38:04,616 Improvise, Dolly. You've got this. You... 550 00:38:04,650 --> 00:38:06,718 Damn straight I do. 551 00:38:11,623 --> 00:38:14,460 -Why, howdy, Elvis! 552 00:38:14,493 --> 00:38:16,027 Ladies and gents, 553 00:38:16,061 --> 00:38:17,596 dollars and cents. 554 00:38:17,629 --> 00:38:19,264 Hello, Dolly. Look at you. 555 00:38:19,297 --> 00:38:21,700 Please do. I'd rather be looked at than overlooked. 556 00:38:21,733 --> 00:38:23,369 -Mm-mm! 557 00:38:24,803 --> 00:38:26,572 Madonna, don't listen to Elvis. 558 00:38:26,605 --> 00:38:28,974 I don't like to be like everybody else. 559 00:38:29,007 --> 00:38:31,076 That's the easiest thing in the world to do. 560 00:38:31,109 --> 00:38:32,378 Love you, Dolly! 561 00:38:32,411 --> 00:38:33,779 But you ain't 562 00:38:33,812 --> 00:38:35,747 the real deal now, are you, Dolly? 563 00:38:35,781 --> 00:38:38,149 Nothin' real about me, but my heart. 564 00:38:38,183 --> 00:38:41,487 I've seen you perform. I ain't so sure. 565 00:38:41,520 --> 00:38:44,322 I've seen you perform too, Elvis. 566 00:38:44,356 --> 00:38:47,493 -That's right. 567 00:38:47,526 --> 00:38:50,295 All men come back for an encore and a standin' ovation, 568 00:38:50,328 --> 00:38:52,330 but you weren't even standin'. 569 00:38:52,364 --> 00:38:54,666 Oh, thank you very much, Dolly. Thanks very much about that. 570 00:38:54,700 --> 00:38:56,602 Miss Dolly Parton here. Thank you very much. 571 00:38:56,635 --> 00:38:59,405 Has he left the buildin' yet? I'm just kiddin'. 572 00:38:59,438 --> 00:39:01,507 Isn't he a sweetie, ladies and gentlemen? 573 00:39:01,540 --> 00:39:03,942 Now, we've got a very special guest here tonight 574 00:39:03,975 --> 00:39:07,312 and I've got a little song for my friend Jack. 575 00:39:27,365 --> 00:39:29,935 Alright, the guest spot in Kenny's show, 576 00:39:29,968 --> 00:39:33,505 starting with five appearances at the Orchard Oriental. 577 00:39:33,539 --> 00:39:35,541 My cut is 35%. 578 00:39:35,574 --> 00:39:36,775 -20. -30. 579 00:39:36,808 --> 00:39:38,176 Done, with a cut of the merch. 580 00:39:38,209 --> 00:39:39,778 We don't have merch. But you know what? 581 00:39:39,811 --> 00:39:41,012 Actually, that's a very good idea. 582 00:39:41,046 --> 00:39:44,015 -Hm. -OK. What do you think? 583 00:39:44,049 --> 00:39:46,618 Dolly says, "You'll never do a whole lot 584 00:39:46,652 --> 00:39:48,654 "unless you're brave enough to try." 585 00:39:48,687 --> 00:39:51,457 Alright, Dolly. Pack your bags. 586 00:39:51,490 --> 00:39:53,859 Sunday, you're going to Hong Kong, baby. 587 00:39:53,892 --> 00:39:55,226 Yes! 588 00:39:59,565 --> 00:40:01,066 -Hmm... -Watch the bar. 589 00:40:01,099 --> 00:40:02,668 -Watch the bar! 590 00:40:03,902 --> 00:40:06,705 Are you gonna come out of the closet to Viv before you fly? 591 00:40:06,738 --> 00:40:08,574 Franny, don't take the piss. 592 00:40:08,607 --> 00:40:10,175 I'm nervous enough as it is. 593 00:40:10,208 --> 00:40:12,043 Come on. This is one bed, one bath. 594 00:40:12,077 --> 00:40:13,979 I am busting my arse right now! 595 00:40:14,012 --> 00:40:15,581 Old self is gone. 596 00:40:15,614 --> 00:40:17,516 I've torn down the fibro, chucked out the asbestos 597 00:40:17,549 --> 00:40:19,485 and the new brick has gone up. 598 00:40:19,518 --> 00:40:21,086 I'm a better house 599 00:40:21,119 --> 00:40:23,421 not ready to be appraised just yet. 600 00:40:23,455 --> 00:40:25,323 Hong Kong is a big deal! 601 00:40:25,356 --> 00:40:27,192 They're gonna start paying me well. 602 00:40:27,225 --> 00:40:29,327 Yeah, that's what I'm saying! It's a professional job. 603 00:40:29,360 --> 00:40:31,797 You can stop covering up. Viv will be proud. 604 00:40:34,099 --> 00:40:36,267 Do you think she might be mildly proud? 605 00:40:37,235 --> 00:40:39,237 It's a great Mother's Day gift. 606 00:40:39,270 --> 00:40:40,572 Mm. 607 00:40:41,707 --> 00:40:44,109 She does love her garden more than she loves me. 608 00:40:44,142 --> 00:40:46,011 That could be true. 609 00:40:46,044 --> 00:40:47,579 Yeah. 610 00:40:47,613 --> 00:40:50,482 -Ooh...! -Oh, Franny, don't. 611 00:41:01,259 --> 00:41:03,962 Well, I've got some news. 612 00:41:03,995 --> 00:41:06,765 Oh, here we go. Brace for it. 613 00:41:06,798 --> 00:41:09,300 -I've got some news too. -Oh. 614 00:41:09,334 --> 00:41:11,269 -But you go first. Go on. -OK. 615 00:41:11,302 --> 00:41:15,473 I sold one of my macrame thingies to a lady at work! 616 00:41:15,507 --> 00:41:17,475 Congrats, Ma. 617 00:41:17,509 --> 00:41:19,444 Is she blind? 618 00:41:19,477 --> 00:41:21,513 Well...yes. 619 00:41:22,514 --> 00:41:25,116 And I've started online dating. 620 00:41:25,150 --> 00:41:26,918 -Whoa. -Mm! 621 00:41:26,952 --> 00:41:28,654 It must be two decades since... 622 00:41:28,687 --> 00:41:30,956 -OK, Dad! Thanks. 623 00:41:30,989 --> 00:41:32,991 Yes, I'm pretty proud of myself. 624 00:41:33,024 --> 00:41:34,726 Very modern of me. 625 00:41:34,760 --> 00:41:37,663 Well, my news, also modern. 626 00:41:37,696 --> 00:41:40,666 -Job. -Oh! Fabulous! 627 00:41:40,699 --> 00:41:42,500 Oh, I couldn't bear another embarrassing 628 00:41:42,534 --> 00:41:44,536 career song and dance. 629 00:41:48,607 --> 00:41:50,842 I'm a Dolly Parton impersonator. 630 00:41:58,550 --> 00:42:01,186 Oh! 631 00:42:02,320 --> 00:42:05,624 OK, I mean, we all know how much you love her, 632 00:42:05,657 --> 00:42:08,026 but people are gonna pay to see you do that, are they? 633 00:42:08,059 --> 00:42:09,494 -Yes! 634 00:42:09,527 --> 00:42:11,663 As much as people pay for your cock and ball thingos. 635 00:42:12,664 --> 00:42:16,367 I manage to be normal, thank you, darling, 636 00:42:16,401 --> 00:42:20,205 while you're off on some wild, sequinned goose chase 637 00:42:20,238 --> 00:42:22,207 that isn't gonna end well. 638 00:42:22,240 --> 00:42:24,976 They're flying me to Hong Kong tonight for a gig 639 00:42:25,010 --> 00:42:27,979 with the world's best Kenny Rogers impersonator. 640 00:42:28,013 --> 00:42:30,716 And we're performing at this really posh hotel 641 00:42:30,749 --> 00:42:32,383 for a whole week! 642 00:42:32,417 --> 00:42:35,186 Much to your surprise, Mum, I'm not an idiot 643 00:42:35,220 --> 00:42:37,388 and it will end well if it kills me. 644 00:42:37,422 --> 00:42:39,224 Dolly or dead! 645 00:42:41,526 --> 00:42:44,029 So...end of discussion. 646 00:43:12,924 --> 00:43:14,860 You're enough. 647 00:43:14,893 --> 00:43:16,928 This will probably be your last job 648 00:43:16,962 --> 00:43:18,864 and you'll never work again. 649 00:43:18,897 --> 00:43:20,331 You're enough. 650 00:43:20,365 --> 00:43:21,933 You're gonna be fine. 651 00:43:21,967 --> 00:43:25,270 -I'm farting too, constantly. 652 00:43:25,303 --> 00:43:27,605 -Must be the plane food. -What? 653 00:43:27,639 --> 00:43:30,075 -I said, "Starting!" -Oh, golly, gotta...gotta go. 654 00:43:30,108 --> 00:43:32,077 I wish we had more time to prepare. 655 00:44:05,677 --> 00:44:07,245 Now, I gotta tell you, folks, 656 00:44:07,278 --> 00:44:11,750 this next song is one of my all-time favourites. 657 00:44:11,783 --> 00:44:13,384 He might be singing it by himself. 658 00:44:13,418 --> 00:44:15,153 -I know. Jesus! -I promised you a surprise. 659 00:44:17,622 --> 00:44:20,591 Oh, no, no, no. 660 00:44:20,625 --> 00:44:22,894 I'm such an idiot. 661 00:44:30,168 --> 00:44:31,336 Far out. 662 00:44:35,173 --> 00:44:37,175 -There she is! That's... -Did I miss it? 663 00:44:37,208 --> 00:44:38,777 -What happened? -Oh, my God. 664 00:44:38,810 --> 00:44:40,178 -It's fine. -It's not fine! 665 00:44:40,211 --> 00:44:41,579 It's not. Where are your other wigs? 666 00:44:41,612 --> 00:44:43,314 -In my dressing room. -We don't have time... 667 00:44:43,348 --> 00:44:45,016 -Go. Go! -It's fine, it's fine. 668 00:44:45,050 --> 00:44:46,752 -I'm going on. -It's not fine. You look crazy. 669 00:44:46,785 --> 00:44:48,653 -Just get it together, OK? -OK. Yeah. 670 00:44:48,686 --> 00:44:50,956 And remember to hold his hand. Be Dolly! 671 00:45:13,378 --> 00:45:15,046 Smile and get it together. 672 00:45:15,080 --> 00:45:16,815 This sexy man makes a girl speechless! 673 00:45:34,599 --> 00:45:36,067 A stream is a small body of water. 674 00:45:36,101 --> 00:45:37,235 Yeah, I know, but it's fine. 675 00:45:37,268 --> 00:45:38,970 There's no way an island fits in a stream. 676 00:45:39,004 --> 00:45:40,071 I know. 677 00:45:57,055 --> 00:45:59,757 Thank you very much. You have been a wonderful audience. 678 00:45:59,791 --> 00:46:01,326 Thank you very much! 679 00:46:03,962 --> 00:46:07,698 And thank you to the divine Dolly Parton. 680 00:46:07,732 --> 00:46:10,168 Well, thank you for havin' me, Kenny. 681 00:46:16,241 --> 00:46:18,743 Shall we sing it one more time? What do you say, folks? 682 00:46:18,776 --> 00:46:20,846 -Let's sing it one more time. 683 00:46:20,879 --> 00:46:23,414 Hey, Dolly, my little star, get...get back up here! 684 00:46:23,448 --> 00:46:26,017 -Come on! -Enunciate! 685 00:46:27,718 --> 00:46:28,887 Oh, my God. 686 00:46:50,108 --> 00:46:54,112 I'm landin', covered in make-up, glitter on my face. 687 00:46:54,145 --> 00:46:55,313 Glitter? 688 00:46:55,346 --> 00:46:57,048 And I hear... 689 00:47:00,251 --> 00:47:02,387 In walks Wilson 690 00:47:02,420 --> 00:47:05,323 and Mr Kenny Rogers himself 691 00:47:05,356 --> 00:47:07,959 and he says, 692 00:47:07,993 --> 00:47:10,595 "You do me better than I do me." 693 00:47:10,628 --> 00:47:12,630 Oh, I love that. 694 00:47:12,663 --> 00:47:14,265 I love that! 695 00:47:14,299 --> 00:47:18,303 Then he goes, "World's best. 696 00:47:18,336 --> 00:47:20,605 "You keep the dream alive, boy." 697 00:47:20,638 --> 00:47:22,540 Ohh! 698 00:47:25,977 --> 00:47:27,445 -Mmm. -Mm-hm. 699 00:47:27,478 --> 00:47:29,948 Oh, his... 700 00:47:29,981 --> 00:47:33,484 ..his music touched me deeply when I was growin' up. 701 00:47:33,518 --> 00:47:34,752 Mm-hm. 702 00:47:34,785 --> 00:47:36,854 And I look like him. 703 00:47:36,888 --> 00:47:39,624 -And he chose me. -Mm-hm. 704 00:47:39,657 --> 00:47:43,128 It's been my clear calling all of my life. 705 00:47:44,129 --> 00:47:47,298 Well, now he's gone, it's...it's just me. 706 00:47:47,332 --> 00:47:48,900 And, uh... 707 00:47:51,369 --> 00:47:53,038 Dolly. 708 00:47:56,407 --> 00:47:58,876 -Oh, Dolly. 709 00:47:58,910 --> 00:48:00,611 Oh, Kenny. 710 00:48:06,084 --> 00:48:08,286 -Get up. Get up. 711 00:48:08,319 --> 00:48:09,554 Oh! 712 00:48:13,391 --> 00:48:15,226 -Oh, Kenny... -Oh! 713 00:48:15,260 --> 00:48:16,827 Oh, Kenny! 714 00:48:17,762 --> 00:48:19,364 Oh, Kenny! 715 00:48:20,665 --> 00:48:22,333 -Oh! -Oh, Dolly. 716 00:48:22,367 --> 00:48:23,734 -Oh, Dolly. 717 00:48:23,768 --> 00:48:25,336 -Oh, Dolly! 718 00:48:25,370 --> 00:48:27,538 -OH, DOLLY! -OH, KENNY! 719 00:48:36,214 --> 00:48:37,582 Hm... 720 00:48:44,189 --> 00:48:45,590 Hmm. 721 00:49:02,373 --> 00:49:05,943 -I've got 'pwesents'! -Hey. 722 00:49:05,977 --> 00:49:07,712 I'm so sorry I didn't call, Franwa. 723 00:49:07,745 --> 00:49:10,915 It's just Hong Kong was just full-on, but it was amazing. 724 00:49:22,160 --> 00:49:25,863 This Kenny Rogers impersonator is such a professional. 725 00:49:25,896 --> 00:49:28,466 -What's his name? -Um... 726 00:49:28,499 --> 00:49:31,036 ..coincidentally, it's Kenny. 727 00:49:31,069 --> 00:49:33,271 His name is Kenny? 728 00:49:37,108 --> 00:49:38,609 Did you two get it on? 729 00:49:41,512 --> 00:49:44,415 -Mmm. -Good for you, mate! 730 00:49:44,449 --> 00:49:47,152 At least one of us is getting laid. 731 00:49:47,185 --> 00:49:49,287 Bring him to Sunday roast so we can all judge him. 732 00:49:49,320 --> 00:49:51,389 -Hmm. -I'm kidding. 733 00:49:51,422 --> 00:49:52,990 Let's not jump ahead, Franny. 734 00:49:53,024 --> 00:49:54,992 But he does bring out the best in me. 735 00:49:57,362 --> 00:49:59,797 If I were an impersonator, I'd want to be... 736 00:49:59,830 --> 00:50:01,332 Who would you be? 737 00:50:02,367 --> 00:50:05,236 -Mm? -I'd be you. 738 00:50:05,270 --> 00:50:07,004 As if you could be me. 739 00:50:07,038 --> 00:50:08,339 Because I blink a lot 740 00:50:08,373 --> 00:50:10,075 because it's really intense living my life 741 00:50:10,108 --> 00:50:11,742 because I've got really full-on hair 742 00:50:11,776 --> 00:50:13,344 and it's really full-on and hard, 743 00:50:13,378 --> 00:50:14,845 but some people just fly to Hong Kong 744 00:50:14,879 --> 00:50:16,781 and then you just become the most perfect Dolly, 745 00:50:16,814 --> 00:50:18,183 the perfect Dolly. 746 00:50:20,551 --> 00:50:22,687 I'm actually making a career out of this. 747 00:50:22,720 --> 00:50:25,456 Yeah, I know, but you can't just be 748 00:50:25,490 --> 00:50:27,692 a cardboard cut-out of an impersonator. 749 00:50:27,725 --> 00:50:29,127 I'm not. 750 00:50:29,160 --> 00:50:30,928 I'm just saying you've gotta bring more to it 751 00:50:30,961 --> 00:50:33,798 than a blonde wig and a bra full of socks, right? 752 00:50:33,831 --> 00:50:35,700 Creatively, 753 00:50:35,733 --> 00:50:37,502 emotionally, socially. 754 00:50:37,535 --> 00:50:39,137 I am bringing more! 755 00:50:50,748 --> 00:50:52,483 It's fibro walls. 756 00:50:52,517 --> 00:50:55,220 You should, um, start looking at rentals. 757 00:50:58,923 --> 00:51:01,058 Also, have you spoken to your mum yet? 758 00:51:01,092 --> 00:51:05,996 I'm wondering if I should "break up" with you or what? 759 00:51:06,030 --> 00:51:08,866 -Um, yeah. Um... 760 00:51:08,899 --> 00:51:12,837 Tell her that I broke up with you because I couldn't... 761 00:51:12,870 --> 00:51:14,372 -..commit. -Open up? 762 00:51:14,405 --> 00:51:16,040 Yeah, great. Perfect. 763 00:51:37,628 --> 00:51:39,564 It's an investment for my career, 764 00:51:39,597 --> 00:51:40,931 so as I was saying, 765 00:51:40,965 --> 00:51:43,334 I just, uh...I don't want to be so flat. 766 00:51:43,368 --> 00:51:46,103 You know, I want to have shape, you know, big'uns. 767 00:51:46,137 --> 00:51:49,106 Take a seat. Doreen, is it? 768 00:51:50,074 --> 00:51:52,610 Uh, it's actually Raylene. 769 00:51:52,643 --> 00:51:55,580 This is the size I am willing to do for you. 770 00:51:55,613 --> 00:51:58,316 They will be beautiful. 771 00:51:59,650 --> 00:52:02,220 The size you're asking for you'd have to work up to 772 00:52:02,253 --> 00:52:06,056 with multiple surgeries over an extensive lifetime career. 773 00:52:06,090 --> 00:52:07,192 Oh. 774 00:52:07,225 --> 00:52:08,793 If you decide to go under the knife, 775 00:52:08,826 --> 00:52:11,462 do you want them under the breast muscle or over? 776 00:52:11,496 --> 00:52:13,063 Let me think. 777 00:52:13,097 --> 00:52:14,765 What did Dolly do? 778 00:52:16,100 --> 00:52:19,069 -Jolene? -Um, yeah? Oh, sorry, yes. 779 00:52:19,103 --> 00:52:21,439 Um, under the breast muscle. 780 00:52:26,311 --> 00:52:28,613 Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together 781 00:52:28,646 --> 00:52:30,581 for the Copy Club's hottest duo, 782 00:52:30,615 --> 00:52:32,783 Kenny and Dolly! 783 00:52:40,491 --> 00:52:42,660 Yee-ha! 784 00:53:43,821 --> 00:53:46,056 OK, Kenny, if you could step out now. 785 00:53:46,090 --> 00:53:48,493 -Alright, baby. Over to you. -OK! 786 00:53:57,067 --> 00:53:59,036 Get over here! 787 00:53:59,069 --> 00:54:01,672 Kenny, I cannot believe this house! 788 00:54:01,706 --> 00:54:04,008 We smash the rest of this tour, baby, 789 00:54:04,041 --> 00:54:06,010 Nashville will be calling. 790 00:54:06,944 --> 00:54:08,746 Mmm. 791 00:54:08,779 --> 00:54:10,047 So... 792 00:54:11,282 --> 00:54:12,883 ..your real name. 793 00:54:12,917 --> 00:54:14,752 You're coming undone here. 794 00:54:14,785 --> 00:54:16,253 -Oh, golly. -Here. 795 00:54:16,287 --> 00:54:17,922 No, you're right, you're right. 796 00:54:21,459 --> 00:54:23,060 Kenny, Dolly. 797 00:54:23,093 --> 00:54:27,532 I'm...I'm Kenny Rogers, officially deed polled and all. 798 00:54:27,565 --> 00:54:30,167 You prefer Dolly, I assume? 799 00:54:30,200 --> 00:54:32,737 Like you have no idea. 800 00:54:35,139 --> 00:54:37,107 People think that I'm weird, 801 00:54:37,141 --> 00:54:39,910 that my behaviour is inappropriate or whatever, 802 00:54:39,944 --> 00:54:43,848 but being a mimic is not enough. 803 00:54:43,881 --> 00:54:46,717 It doesn't matter who you are or what industry you're in. 804 00:54:46,751 --> 00:54:49,286 You cannot be halfway in. 805 00:54:49,320 --> 00:54:51,556 Yeah, you've gotta bring everythin'. 806 00:54:51,589 --> 00:54:54,792 Emotionally, creatively, socially. 807 00:54:54,825 --> 00:54:56,160 I get it. 808 00:54:57,962 --> 00:55:00,264 You're just blossomin'. 809 00:55:02,266 --> 00:55:05,636 Dolly would be really proud of you, Dolly. 810 00:55:06,937 --> 00:55:09,440 And we just fit, you and I. 811 00:55:13,110 --> 00:55:16,246 Still, here we are, 812 00:55:16,280 --> 00:55:19,384 both of us lonely. 813 00:56:23,347 --> 00:56:24,949 Okey-dokey. 814 00:56:24,982 --> 00:56:26,651 Five, six, seven, eight... 815 00:56:26,684 --> 00:56:28,052 OK. 816 00:56:28,085 --> 00:56:30,054 Well... Alright. 817 00:56:30,087 --> 00:56:32,623 You got your own room for your private gal time. 818 00:56:32,657 --> 00:56:34,124 Mm-hm. 819 00:56:34,158 --> 00:56:36,894 And don't worry. I'm not too far away. Just over there. 820 00:56:36,927 --> 00:56:40,565 Spare key set cut for front and back door 821 00:56:40,598 --> 00:56:42,399 just in case you get locked out. 822 00:56:44,334 --> 00:56:45,536 Huh! 823 00:56:45,570 --> 00:56:47,572 I guess we're doin' this. 824 00:56:47,605 --> 00:56:49,173 Home, sweet home! 825 00:56:53,277 --> 00:56:54,712 -Oh, baby. -Mmm! 826 00:57:28,378 --> 00:57:29,614 Yeah! 827 00:57:32,950 --> 00:57:35,419 I know. I know. 828 00:57:35,452 --> 00:57:38,355 Ladies and gentlemen, would you please welcome 829 00:57:38,388 --> 00:57:41,458 our newest master of ceremonies, 830 00:57:41,492 --> 00:57:44,962 the Empress of Country, 831 00:57:44,995 --> 00:57:46,797 Ms Dolly Parton! 832 00:57:50,901 --> 00:57:53,270 Thank you! 833 00:57:53,303 --> 00:57:55,540 Welcome, my new friends. 834 00:57:55,573 --> 00:57:57,808 Oh, my golly, welcome! 835 00:57:57,842 --> 00:58:01,078 It is important to keep our homes open to everybody. 836 00:58:01,111 --> 00:58:04,715 It doesn't matter what size, colour, shape you are. 837 00:58:04,749 --> 00:58:07,985 You find out who you are and you do it on purpose. 838 00:58:11,689 --> 00:58:13,791 Ain't that right, Elvis? 839 00:58:14,759 --> 00:58:16,160 Truth is like the sun. 840 00:58:16,193 --> 00:58:18,896 You can shut it out for a time, but it ain't goin' away. 841 00:58:21,431 --> 00:58:24,835 Dolly! Dolly! Dolly! Dolly! 842 00:58:24,869 --> 00:58:28,272 Dolly! Dolly! Dolly! Dolly! 843 00:59:12,516 --> 00:59:14,919 That's Zhang, my new border. 844 00:59:18,355 --> 00:59:20,224 I'm assuming you're worried about me 845 00:59:20,257 --> 00:59:22,126 and you've come to apologise 846 00:59:22,159 --> 00:59:24,528 for falling off the face of the earth. 847 00:59:24,561 --> 00:59:27,164 I'm fine. Lost weight. Mm. See? 848 00:59:27,197 --> 00:59:29,399 I've come to give you some cash for the mortgage 849 00:59:29,433 --> 00:59:32,136 and invite you to my gig, 850 00:59:32,169 --> 00:59:34,905 which is at your favourite theatre, 851 00:59:34,939 --> 00:59:36,874 Twin Palms. 852 00:59:36,907 --> 00:59:40,544 Hmm. A step up from the school talent contest. 853 00:59:40,577 --> 00:59:42,813 I'll come for a laugh. 854 00:59:42,847 --> 00:59:45,716 No, Mum, don't come for a laugh. 855 00:59:46,951 --> 00:59:48,385 It's serious! 856 00:59:48,418 --> 00:59:51,455 I mean, they're talking Nashville and a US tour. 857 00:59:52,422 --> 00:59:54,892 I can't win with you. 858 01:00:04,234 --> 01:00:07,938 I was devastated to hear that you and Franny were a joke. 859 01:00:08,906 --> 01:00:10,440 How cruel. 860 01:00:54,518 --> 01:00:57,121 Alright! Alright! 861 01:00:57,154 --> 01:00:58,622 It's her problem! 862 01:01:01,692 --> 01:01:04,228 "Kenny in the Kimberley." Got a great ring to it. 863 01:01:04,261 --> 01:01:05,996 How long till you're back? 864 01:01:06,030 --> 01:01:09,399 It's only two weeks, baby, but...I'll miss you. 865 01:01:09,433 --> 01:01:11,501 -Mm-hm. -I will. 866 01:01:11,535 --> 01:01:13,303 At home, on stage, 867 01:01:13,337 --> 01:01:15,873 backstage, everywhere. 868 01:01:19,109 --> 01:01:20,745 I'll give you a call once I land. 869 01:01:20,778 --> 01:01:22,179 OK. 870 01:01:31,621 --> 01:01:35,659 My weapons of mass distraction. Hm. 871 01:01:36,626 --> 01:01:37,661 Hmm! 872 01:01:38,896 --> 01:01:41,698 Mm, let's do this. 873 01:01:56,413 --> 01:01:57,915 Here we go. 874 01:01:59,483 --> 01:02:01,651 Little sting. Little prick. 875 01:02:07,024 --> 01:02:09,359 Everything's gonna be alright. 876 01:02:11,095 --> 01:02:12,997 Yeah. 877 01:03:58,268 --> 01:03:59,836 Hey, it's OK. 878 01:03:59,870 --> 01:04:02,139 You're in recovery and this is normal. 879 01:04:02,172 --> 01:04:05,509 Your body is naturally going into protective mode 880 01:04:05,542 --> 01:04:07,577 and is rejecting the implants, which is absolutely... 881 01:04:07,611 --> 01:04:09,246 -Normal. -..normal. 882 01:04:09,279 --> 01:04:11,081 Oh. 883 01:04:11,115 --> 01:04:12,749 I'll go and get you some morphine. 884 01:04:12,782 --> 01:04:14,151 OK. 885 01:04:14,184 --> 01:04:17,587 Oh, and your next of kin is waiting for you outside. 886 01:04:17,621 --> 01:04:19,656 Oh, shit. 887 01:04:22,392 --> 01:04:25,529 Whoo-hoo! Whoo! Yes, yes! 888 01:04:25,562 --> 01:04:29,733 Franwa, hello! 889 01:04:30,834 --> 01:04:34,238 Do I look 'boobiful'? I can't say it! 890 01:04:35,672 --> 01:04:37,474 -Why are you so angry? 891 01:04:38,408 --> 01:04:40,410 Everything's gonna be alright. 892 01:04:55,359 --> 01:04:57,161 Cutting yourself to be beautiful 893 01:04:57,194 --> 01:04:59,463 is unbelievable to me. 894 01:04:59,496 --> 01:05:00,830 It's fucking stupid! 895 01:05:00,864 --> 01:05:02,699 Oh, why are you so jacked up 896 01:05:02,732 --> 01:05:04,468 about what I do with my body anyway? 897 01:05:04,501 --> 01:05:05,835 Because I'm your mate 898 01:05:05,869 --> 01:05:07,704 trying to stop you from making dumb choices. 899 01:05:07,737 --> 01:05:09,506 Well, I don't need saving. 900 01:05:09,539 --> 01:05:11,575 I'm not trying to save you. 901 01:05:11,608 --> 01:05:13,877 I'm trying to love you, you arsehole! 902 01:05:17,347 --> 01:05:19,849 Ow. 903 01:05:23,520 --> 01:05:25,555 If you hadn't had your head so far up your arse, 904 01:05:25,589 --> 01:05:27,891 you'd know I've actually met someone. 905 01:05:47,377 --> 01:05:49,179 That's right, ladies and gentlemen. 906 01:05:49,213 --> 01:05:51,848 I am back and I am better than ever! 907 01:05:55,986 --> 01:05:58,922 I've always had big'uns, just not this big. 908 01:05:59,889 --> 01:06:01,525 I used to be a little champagne glass 909 01:06:01,558 --> 01:06:03,093 and now I'm a watermelon. 910 01:06:03,127 --> 01:06:05,095 -Whoo! 911 01:06:34,991 --> 01:06:36,526 Oh... 912 01:06:41,331 --> 01:06:43,433 Who is the real Kenny? 913 01:06:54,378 --> 01:06:56,446 Oh, where is this guy? 914 01:07:00,450 --> 01:07:02,652 Kenny, Kenny, Kenny, Kenny, Kenny! 915 01:07:04,288 --> 01:07:05,822 You're part synthetic. 916 01:07:05,855 --> 01:07:08,692 Well, I think that's probably true. 917 01:07:08,725 --> 01:07:11,995 I think a part of what magic I may have 918 01:07:12,028 --> 01:07:13,797 as far as my personality 919 01:07:13,830 --> 01:07:15,799 is the fact that I look totally artificial 920 01:07:15,832 --> 01:07:17,601 and I like to think that I'm totally real. 921 01:07:18,835 --> 01:07:20,504 Do you see yourself as a sex symbol? 922 01:07:20,537 --> 01:07:22,172 I feel sexy. 923 01:07:22,206 --> 01:07:25,542 I...I try to be, uh, sexy, I guess... 924 01:07:25,575 --> 01:07:27,277 Is that my star man? 925 01:07:27,311 --> 01:07:30,514 I got an early flight 'cause I missed my girl! 926 01:07:31,515 --> 01:07:32,982 I got presents! 927 01:07:33,016 --> 01:07:36,486 Whoo-hoo-hoo, girl! 928 01:07:36,520 --> 01:07:39,055 Yeah...girls! 929 01:07:39,089 --> 01:07:41,691 I'm 100% committed. 930 01:07:41,725 --> 01:07:44,027 -Hmm. -You wanna feel 'em? 931 01:07:48,698 --> 01:07:51,101 -Right? 932 01:07:52,236 --> 01:07:53,737 Why'd you do that? 933 01:07:53,770 --> 01:07:56,005 Because the other ones weren't working. 934 01:07:58,442 --> 01:08:01,278 I hadn't noticed, but I'm a butt man, so... 935 01:08:02,279 --> 01:08:03,780 Huh. 936 01:08:04,781 --> 01:08:06,883 Well, these are real. 937 01:08:06,916 --> 01:08:10,187 Sure thing, Doll. I hope they make you happy. 938 01:08:12,856 --> 01:08:14,824 So...so, um... 939 01:08:14,858 --> 01:08:17,961 Yeah, it's a little messy, but I'm gettin' to it. 940 01:08:24,468 --> 01:08:26,102 Have, uh, you been... 941 01:08:27,103 --> 01:08:29,273 ..you been going through my things? 942 01:08:32,776 --> 01:08:35,179 Lookin' for what? 943 01:08:35,212 --> 01:08:38,382 Your momma. Your friends. 944 01:08:38,415 --> 01:08:40,284 More about the real you. 945 01:08:40,317 --> 01:08:42,452 I...I am real. 946 01:08:44,954 --> 01:08:46,890 So how'd you get here? 947 01:08:48,558 --> 01:08:50,560 Do you miss your old self? 948 01:08:53,797 --> 01:08:55,732 Come on, now. 949 01:08:56,933 --> 01:08:59,269 You can't just be a cardboard cut-out. 950 01:08:59,303 --> 01:09:00,937 Well... 951 01:09:04,474 --> 01:09:06,176 Kenny Rogers, baby. 952 01:09:23,460 --> 01:09:24,994 You OK? 953 01:09:28,164 --> 01:09:30,066 Red, the Twin Palms Theatre has sold out. 954 01:09:30,099 --> 01:09:31,968 -Mm. -Congratulations! 955 01:09:32,001 --> 01:09:33,437 Oh... 956 01:09:34,438 --> 01:09:36,773 Dolly's finally taken over, hey? 957 01:09:36,806 --> 01:09:38,808 What does Kenny think of your new equipment? 958 01:09:41,110 --> 01:09:43,146 He's a butt man. 959 01:09:43,179 --> 01:09:45,849 But I didn't do it for him. I did it for myself. 960 01:09:49,519 --> 01:09:52,155 You alright? 961 01:09:52,188 --> 01:09:54,190 -Oh! 962 01:09:54,224 --> 01:09:55,692 Night. 963 01:09:55,725 --> 01:09:58,395 -Oh. 964 01:10:01,231 --> 01:10:03,300 Hey, Dolly. 965 01:10:03,333 --> 01:10:05,835 So how's it been fillin' my shoes, 966 01:10:05,869 --> 01:10:08,171 takin' my job, hm? 967 01:10:08,204 --> 01:10:11,308 You think you're so fuckin' special. 968 01:10:11,341 --> 01:10:12,509 Nothin' real about me... 969 01:10:12,542 --> 01:10:14,478 -..'cept my heart. -'Cept my heart. Mm. 970 01:10:18,915 --> 01:10:21,318 Those look real fake. 971 01:10:21,351 --> 01:10:23,520 Your opinion means nothin' to me. 972 01:10:24,554 --> 01:10:26,523 Well, then, you won't mind me reminding you 973 01:10:26,556 --> 01:10:27,991 of who you really are. 974 01:10:28,024 --> 01:10:30,860 I know what's under that wig... 975 01:10:32,562 --> 01:10:34,298 ..Raylene. 976 01:10:34,331 --> 01:10:36,032 -Hey! 977 01:10:36,065 --> 01:10:37,200 I... 978 01:10:37,233 --> 01:10:39,336 -I... 979 01:10:41,271 --> 01:10:43,373 It's so easy for you. 980 01:10:46,510 --> 01:10:48,378 You have no idea. 981 01:10:53,583 --> 01:10:55,752 It's not easy for any of us! 982 01:11:22,446 --> 01:11:24,213 You're seriously red 983 01:11:24,247 --> 01:11:26,182 and you have no titties. 984 01:11:26,215 --> 01:11:28,117 It's nothin' personal, darlin', but, uh, 985 01:11:28,151 --> 01:11:30,454 the truth is like the sun. 986 01:11:30,487 --> 01:11:32,055 You can shut it out for a time, 987 01:11:32,088 --> 01:11:34,190 but it ain't goin' away. 988 01:11:34,223 --> 01:11:35,459 Oh! 989 01:11:55,645 --> 01:11:56,913 Mmm! 990 01:11:56,946 --> 01:11:59,048 Dolly, honey. 991 01:11:59,082 --> 01:12:00,650 -Quit, quit, quit... -Shh, shh, shh, shh. 992 01:12:02,118 --> 01:12:05,722 Baby, stop! Dolly, this is serious business, alright? 993 01:12:05,755 --> 01:12:08,091 Now, I want to show you something, alright? 994 01:12:20,303 --> 01:12:23,106 My daddy, he was in the army. 995 01:12:23,139 --> 01:12:25,509 He made me shave it all off. 996 01:12:25,542 --> 01:12:27,276 He was violent. 997 01:12:29,546 --> 01:12:31,381 He was a real piece of work. 998 01:12:33,316 --> 01:12:35,852 One of the saddest days of my childhood. 999 01:12:41,625 --> 01:12:44,260 Just because you lost your fuzz 1000 01:12:44,293 --> 01:12:46,396 don't mean you ain't a peach. 1001 01:12:51,000 --> 01:12:53,069 You're a good man, Kenny. 1002 01:12:55,472 --> 01:12:57,441 Hey. 1003 01:12:57,474 --> 01:12:58,975 You're a good man. 1004 01:13:03,547 --> 01:13:05,582 I wanna meet your mom. 1005 01:13:07,651 --> 01:13:09,853 Uh-huh. 1006 01:13:14,558 --> 01:13:16,092 Mm. 1007 01:13:19,395 --> 01:13:21,698 -And, darling? -Mm? 1008 01:13:21,731 --> 01:13:23,933 Breasts? 1009 01:13:25,569 --> 01:13:28,204 Well, I get to choose what I do with my body 1010 01:13:28,237 --> 01:13:29,873 because it's mine. 1011 01:13:29,906 --> 01:13:31,541 If people have gotta look at you, 1012 01:13:31,575 --> 01:13:34,177 at least give them somethin' decent to look at. 1013 01:13:34,210 --> 01:13:35,879 Ain't that right, Zhang? 1014 01:13:35,912 --> 01:13:37,681 And what about you two? 1015 01:13:37,714 --> 01:13:40,484 -Francis introduced us. -Mm! 1016 01:13:48,958 --> 01:13:50,393 Mm. 1017 01:13:52,295 --> 01:13:56,199 Viv...this chicken is delicious. 1018 01:13:56,232 --> 01:14:00,403 Oh, thank you...Kenny. 1019 01:14:00,436 --> 01:14:02,071 It's not too dry? 1020 01:14:02,105 --> 01:14:05,241 Oh! So tender. 1021 01:14:07,410 --> 01:14:08,578 I'll get it. 1022 01:14:08,612 --> 01:14:11,715 Thank you. 1023 01:14:12,916 --> 01:14:14,551 Hey, Zhang. 1024 01:14:14,584 --> 01:14:16,686 -Oh, darling, hello! -Hi! 1025 01:14:16,720 --> 01:14:19,055 -How are you? -Good to see you. 1026 01:14:19,088 --> 01:14:21,390 Red, this is Betty. 1027 01:14:21,424 --> 01:14:23,727 Oh, Dolly, Betty. 1028 01:14:23,760 --> 01:14:25,294 It's so great you're finally here 1029 01:14:25,328 --> 01:14:26,730 and I get to meet you! 1030 01:14:26,763 --> 01:14:30,066 It's funny. I get 'Ruby' all the time. 1031 01:14:30,099 --> 01:14:31,868 So sorry we're late, Viv. 1032 01:14:31,901 --> 01:14:34,270 I'm Kenny, man. Nice to meet you. 1033 01:14:34,303 --> 01:14:35,672 -Hi. -Pleasure. 1034 01:14:37,406 --> 01:14:39,108 Thank you. 1035 01:14:47,083 --> 01:14:48,718 You can trump last time. 1036 01:14:50,286 --> 01:14:52,121 So what do you do? 1037 01:14:52,155 --> 01:14:54,490 I'm...I'm a lawyer. 1038 01:14:54,524 --> 01:14:56,960 Very serious job, not like yours. 1039 01:14:58,962 --> 01:15:01,931 Oh, I'm very proud of my girl. 1040 01:15:01,965 --> 01:15:03,567 She has worked hard. 1041 01:15:03,600 --> 01:15:06,302 This little Dolly, she's dynamite. 1042 01:15:06,335 --> 01:15:09,105 The kid always had the spirit in her. 1043 01:15:09,138 --> 01:15:12,576 Nice one, Gramps. He's a wise guy. 1044 01:15:12,609 --> 01:15:16,279 Well, blessings don't come without difficulties. 1045 01:15:16,312 --> 01:15:17,847 Amen. 1046 01:15:20,216 --> 01:15:22,752 I'd love to see your garden, Viv. 1047 01:15:22,786 --> 01:15:25,421 Darling, of course! 1048 01:15:25,454 --> 01:15:28,958 I had let it go, but Lionel and Zhang and I 1049 01:15:28,992 --> 01:15:32,629 have been working very hard in the garden. 1050 01:15:32,662 --> 01:15:34,764 -Mm. Let's go. Let's go! -Let me get that. 1051 01:15:34,798 --> 01:15:37,000 -Come on! -Hm? OK, right now? 1052 01:15:37,033 --> 01:15:39,435 Oh, thank you. Aw! 1053 01:15:39,468 --> 01:15:41,337 -My pleasure. -Excuse me. 1054 01:15:41,370 --> 01:15:43,439 Come on, love. 1055 01:15:43,472 --> 01:15:45,675 Yours is a mashed potato! 1056 01:15:45,709 --> 01:15:46,943 Ahh! 1057 01:15:46,976 --> 01:15:49,412 Oh, it's good to see you, Red. 1058 01:15:50,580 --> 01:15:51,981 'Dwinks'! 1059 01:16:08,898 --> 01:16:10,667 Whee! 1060 01:16:10,700 --> 01:16:12,802 Whoo! 1061 01:16:12,836 --> 01:16:15,672 So what's the hardest case you've had? 1062 01:16:15,705 --> 01:16:20,376 Ooh, yeah, I had this one absolute... 1063 01:16:28,217 --> 01:16:30,319 You are out of your mind! 1064 01:16:30,353 --> 01:16:33,089 -Franny, Franny... -What are you doing? 1065 01:16:35,124 --> 01:16:38,427 Dolly Parton is about being the best version of yourself, 1066 01:16:38,461 --> 01:16:41,464 but to never take yourself too seriously. 1067 01:16:42,465 --> 01:16:44,600 You're living as someone else, 1068 01:16:44,634 --> 01:16:46,936 with someone else 1069 01:16:46,970 --> 01:16:49,005 who is also living as someone else! 1070 01:16:49,038 --> 01:16:51,374 Yeah, so? 1071 01:16:51,407 --> 01:16:53,509 That's the gig! 1072 01:16:53,542 --> 01:16:57,714 And life is working unbelievably better this way. 1073 01:16:57,747 --> 01:16:59,382 And he is who he is, 1074 01:16:59,415 --> 01:17:01,050 which is a version of someone else, 1075 01:17:01,084 --> 01:17:02,451 and you're you, which is you, 1076 01:17:02,485 --> 01:17:04,087 which I'm sure is a version of yourself 1077 01:17:04,120 --> 01:17:06,055 and I'm sure probably someone else! 1078 01:17:06,089 --> 01:17:07,290 You're lost. 1079 01:17:07,323 --> 01:17:09,325 If you're busy being someone else... 1080 01:17:12,095 --> 01:17:14,497 ..who's busy being you? 1081 01:17:47,430 --> 01:17:49,799 What am I gonna do, Dolly? 1082 01:17:52,501 --> 01:17:55,338 It's OK to be nervous. Tomorrow's show is a big deal. 1083 01:17:55,371 --> 01:17:56,973 I don't know what's wrong with me! 1084 01:17:58,374 --> 01:18:00,343 The more unique you are as a person, 1085 01:18:00,376 --> 01:18:02,645 the harder it is to be someone else. 1086 01:18:02,678 --> 01:18:04,848 That's why Kenny does it so well. 1087 01:18:04,881 --> 01:18:08,484 He was just a blank canvas before. 1088 01:18:08,517 --> 01:18:10,353 He was a starter kit. 1089 01:18:11,554 --> 01:18:13,089 Being Kenny Rogers 1090 01:18:13,122 --> 01:18:16,659 gave him more than he ever would've had without it. 1091 01:18:16,692 --> 01:18:18,627 Why did you stop being Neil Diamond 1092 01:18:18,661 --> 01:18:20,496 when you were so successful? 1093 01:18:21,898 --> 01:18:24,300 I was tired of ripping myself off... 1094 01:18:25,468 --> 01:18:28,805 ..ripping my wife off being someone else. 1095 01:18:31,040 --> 01:18:33,743 The only applause I ever really needed was from her. 1096 01:18:35,044 --> 01:18:37,113 I realised that too late. 1097 01:18:37,146 --> 01:18:39,082 But who are you? 1098 01:18:41,384 --> 01:18:46,022 I mean, are...are you a copy, are you a copy-copy? 1099 01:18:46,055 --> 01:18:48,624 You're still walking around like you're Neil Diamond. 1100 01:18:48,657 --> 01:18:50,994 You ever read about a frog who dreamed of being a king 1101 01:18:51,027 --> 01:18:52,695 and then became one? 1102 01:18:56,732 --> 01:18:59,502 Except for the names and a few other places, 1103 01:18:59,535 --> 01:19:02,906 when you talk about me, the story's the same one. 1104 01:19:41,644 --> 01:19:43,179 You got this, kid. 1105 01:20:25,955 --> 01:20:27,756 It's all a bit ridiculous. 1106 01:20:30,193 --> 01:20:33,262 You get your looks from me, though, obviously. 1107 01:20:51,514 --> 01:20:52,781 Hello, love. 1108 01:21:05,661 --> 01:21:07,964 Ladies and gentlemen, take your seats. 1109 01:21:07,997 --> 01:21:10,499 The show you've all been waiting for! 1110 01:23:25,268 --> 01:23:28,304 Thank you, folks! Thank you very much! 1111 01:23:28,337 --> 01:23:29,938 Yee-ha! 1112 01:23:29,972 --> 01:23:32,241 Oh, wow! Wow! 1113 01:23:34,643 --> 01:23:37,180 I, um... 1114 01:23:37,213 --> 01:23:42,985 I...I usually keep my cards pretty close to my chest. 1115 01:23:43,018 --> 01:23:45,788 But tonight I got something to say. 1116 01:23:45,821 --> 01:23:48,924 I LOVE you, baby! 1117 01:23:50,459 --> 01:23:53,262 I love you, I love you, I love you! 1118 01:23:53,296 --> 01:23:55,831 -Kenny... -Heaven and earth. 1119 01:23:56,832 --> 01:23:59,235 -Oh, no. 1120 01:24:04,507 --> 01:24:05,841 Marry me. 1121 01:24:05,874 --> 01:24:08,177 Oh, Kenny... 1122 01:24:08,211 --> 01:24:10,946 He's just foolin' around. Come on, baby. 1123 01:24:10,979 --> 01:24:12,648 Marry me, baby. This is it. 1124 01:24:12,681 --> 01:24:14,950 This is the way it's meant to be. 1125 01:24:14,983 --> 01:24:16,552 What do you say, folks? 1126 01:24:19,322 --> 01:24:20,823 It's definitely not a joke. 1127 01:24:20,856 --> 01:24:23,226 Well, he's never really been that funny. 1128 01:24:23,259 --> 01:24:26,095 I want all of you to share in this moment. 1129 01:24:27,596 --> 01:24:29,265 Babe, I love you. 1130 01:24:32,368 --> 01:24:34,803 Kenny, you're not in love with me. 1131 01:24:34,837 --> 01:24:36,705 I am. 1132 01:24:36,739 --> 01:24:38,407 Baby, I sure am. 1133 01:24:38,441 --> 01:24:40,309 Kenny, don't do this. 1134 01:24:42,010 --> 01:24:44,713 I thought that this was what you wanted. 1135 01:24:59,428 --> 01:25:01,197 -I can't do this. 1136 01:25:03,632 --> 01:25:05,801 I'm not the girl you want, Kenny. 1137 01:25:07,470 --> 01:25:09,305 I'm not her. 1138 01:25:15,778 --> 01:25:19,582 But that silly-billy Dolly... 1139 01:25:21,717 --> 01:25:25,221 ..taught me all the things that you loved, that I pretended. 1140 01:25:33,996 --> 01:25:37,733 To have confidence in yourself. 1141 01:25:39,802 --> 01:25:42,471 And that bravery is vulnerability. 1142 01:25:43,906 --> 01:25:46,475 And to not put a value on yourself, 1143 01:25:46,509 --> 01:25:48,277 but value the things you love. 1144 01:25:48,311 --> 01:25:49,712 -Oh, what... 1145 01:25:49,745 --> 01:25:51,280 Baby, what are you doin'? 1146 01:25:53,782 --> 01:25:55,884 Dolly's got some wisdom. 1147 01:25:55,918 --> 01:25:57,820 Dolly's got so much wisdom. 1148 01:25:57,853 --> 01:26:01,257 I haven't got any wisdom, but I do know 1149 01:26:01,290 --> 01:26:04,760 that I've got to learn to be all those things, but as me. 1150 01:26:06,094 --> 01:26:07,830 This is not an impulse reaction. 1151 01:26:07,863 --> 01:26:11,099 I'm stripteasing in a somewhat untidy fashion, 1152 01:26:11,133 --> 01:26:14,803 all in the name of saving myself... 1153 01:26:21,710 --> 01:26:23,779 ..and the skin that I'm in. 1154 01:26:30,118 --> 01:26:31,487 Oh! 1155 01:26:45,568 --> 01:26:47,303 Eeee! 1156 01:26:56,211 --> 01:26:58,213 I love you, Mum. 1157 01:27:00,082 --> 01:27:02,651 I love you too, darling. 1158 01:27:05,321 --> 01:27:07,823 -She's mine! 1159 01:27:13,262 --> 01:27:16,198 I propose and women drop their knickers! 1160 01:27:22,104 --> 01:27:24,307 You go back out there. That's for you. 1161 01:27:24,340 --> 01:27:26,642 It's OK. I don't need it. 1162 01:27:42,891 --> 01:27:44,560 Have a good night, folks. 1163 01:27:57,640 --> 01:27:59,408 Hm... Ohh! 1164 01:28:01,910 --> 01:28:03,679 Ohh. 1165 01:28:28,003 --> 01:28:29,472 Nice to see you. 1166 01:28:29,505 --> 01:28:32,408 Ain't you all glad that the king is back? 1167 01:28:39,247 --> 01:28:41,316 And later on today - and I'll say it again - 1168 01:28:41,350 --> 01:28:43,419 I want you to have a great day. 1169 01:28:43,452 --> 01:28:46,054 Later on today - and I'll say it again - 1170 01:28:46,088 --> 01:28:47,756 I want you to have a great day. 1171 01:28:47,790 --> 01:28:49,758 -Kenny! Showtime! 1172 01:28:49,792 --> 01:28:51,494 Thanks, Tom. 1173 01:28:51,527 --> 01:28:55,230 Now, to the most outstanding valuer of the year. 1174 01:28:55,263 --> 01:28:58,233 I'm excited to announce the winner is... 1175 01:28:58,266 --> 01:28:59,468 ..Francis! 1176 01:28:59,502 --> 01:29:02,938 -Whoo! 1177 01:29:02,971 --> 01:29:04,573 Whoo-hoo! 1178 01:29:04,607 --> 01:29:06,442 Good work, Francis! Good man! 1179 01:29:06,475 --> 01:29:08,110 Go, Francis! 1180 01:29:10,946 --> 01:29:13,916 Um, I'm terrified at public speaking 1181 01:29:13,949 --> 01:29:19,287 so I hoped wearing this would give me David Bowie guts 1182 01:29:19,321 --> 01:29:22,691 to get up here and say thank you. 1183 01:29:22,725 --> 01:29:24,527 So, um... 1184 01:29:26,662 --> 01:29:28,130 ..thank you. 1185 01:29:34,970 --> 01:29:36,639 Whoo! 1186 01:29:48,216 --> 01:29:49,852 I wasn't gonna miss it. 1187 01:29:52,187 --> 01:29:54,022 Awards are kind of stupid. 1188 01:29:55,591 --> 01:29:57,560 I'm really sorry, Franny. 1189 01:29:59,728 --> 01:30:01,497 You really pushed it. 1190 01:30:03,198 --> 01:30:05,668 -You pushed me. -I know. 1191 01:30:06,669 --> 01:30:08,036 I just wanted that feeling 1192 01:30:08,070 --> 01:30:10,473 that everyone else looks like they're having. 1193 01:30:10,506 --> 01:30:12,374 You know, that they're respected and... 1194 01:30:13,576 --> 01:30:15,110 ..you know. 1195 01:30:29,458 --> 01:30:32,260 What would the world do with two Dolly Partons? 1196 01:30:44,807 --> 01:30:46,609 Celebrate? 1197 01:30:53,248 --> 01:30:54,783 You know I'm doing a new thing. 1198 01:30:54,817 --> 01:30:56,184 -Oh, yeah? -Yeah. 1199 01:30:56,218 --> 01:30:57,920 I think I've kind of found my audience. 1200 01:30:57,953 --> 01:30:59,755 -As yourself? -Yeah. 1201 01:30:59,788 --> 01:31:02,024 Everyone else is taken. 1202 01:31:15,671 --> 01:31:19,241 My name is Red and I'm your teacher. 78230

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