All language subtitles for That.70s.Show.S07E08.BDRip.x264-FGT

hey, thanks for coming down to meet my sister, man.
I had dinner with her and my dad last night,

it was the first family dinner I had ever been to where
we didn't have to sneak out of the restaurant one at a time.

Man, hyde, first a new dad,
now a new sister--

it's like you hit
the orphan lottery.

Look, your dad's got a whole jar
of peppermint patties.

That's class, baby.

That's nothing, you guys. I found
20 bucks just sitting on the desk,

and I kind of
wanna steal it.

Wow, I'm really starting to see
the underbelly of not having a job.

Check it out, hyde--
your dad knows Skynyrd.

I heard when you first meet them, if you just yell
"free bird" really loud, they'll start playing it.

Ah, angie, meet your
new brother's friends--

they're scruffy, but they
don't seem to be dangerous.

Hey, guys,
check it out-

family 'fro.

I know what
you're thinking.

What are the odds that steven would have
a previously unknown black half-sister?

Well, I'll tell you--
2,437 to 1.

I'm a math major.

A math major? Awesome. I need
some help building a homemade rocket,

and we also need a hamster that's
not afraid of heights or being blown up.

- You must be kelso.
- Yeah, I am.

Boy, am I glad you showed up. It's a lot of pressure
being the only good-looking one in the room.

Michael, that
is so rude.

You know there's two of us.

And that makes
you Jackie.

That's right. Hi.

Okay, so let me bring you
up to speed on the group.

Too skinny, too tall, too horny,
too foreign, too-riffic.

Look at this-- my two kids
together and getting along.

That's it, 20 bucks
for everybody.

It's okay. I
already got mine.

I took it off
your desk.

I'm at a really weird
place in my life.

Hey, man.

Hey, I brought
everyone cupcakes.

- Cool!
- Cupcakes!

Here's a special one for you-- vanilla on
the outside and chocolate on the inside.

what are you doing? You knew
I was gonna take that one.

Oh, well, too late.

You're always doing that.

That is the reason
why we broke up.

We broke up because you
were always cheating on me.

That and the cupcake thing.

So this is where
you hang out, huh?

Do the people who own this
place know we're down here?

Yeah, they kind of adopted me.

You don't know this about me,
but I've had, like, 13 dads.

You know, I don't know
so much about you.

I mean, like, what kind of stuff
did you do growing up?

Did you play sports?

Well, I used to play this
one game called stoop.

What you do is
you sit on a stoop

and you chuck things
at passersby.

I was a pro.

I was a passerby.

Did you know that I am a shampoo
boy down at the beauty salon?

Yes,

ladies come from miles around
to be touched by these magic hands.

Is that why they're
all dry and chapped?

No.

That's from
my day off.

So, angie, are you excited about your
first day at work at dad's office tomorrow?

Yeah, but I'm a little nervous.
I mean, it's my first job out of college.

Oh, believe me, this is
the easiest job I've ever had.

Wait. What about the time you got paid 2 bucks to eat everything
out of forman's fridge and then you threw it up all over the place?

That was you.

Oh, yeah.

That was awesome.

So it's cool if we
slack off at work.

Look, any time I even think about
work, I remember one thing--

I'm the
boss's son,

then I head down to the nearest
bar to chug beer and play darts.

Ah, beer and darts-- keeping the eye
patch industry alive since the 1800s.

Kitty,

you told me we were going
to the hardware store.

And you told me I'd have a fur coat
by winter. People say a lot of things.

But this is no
place for a man.

But it's 25 ladies and me.
I think I like my chances.

Kitty, I gotta
get out of here.

One of these ladies is likely to come
over here and try to talk me into a toupee.

Okay, Fez...

give me
the gossip.

Is that glitter
in your hair?

Are you making
me a pi�ata?

No. I was working on a new outfit
for eric to wear at the roller disco.

Roller disco? Eric is
into roller disco?

Uh-oh.

I'm sorry. We're gonna have to reschedule 'cause
I have to go spread this embarrassing news.

You can't tell anyone.
I promised eric I'd keep it a secret.

Besides, you used to
roller disco with jackie.

Sure, when I
was a child,

but I'm a man now.

I moved on to
robot dancing.

Hey, you wanted to see me?

Have a seat, steven.

It's come to my attention you've been
sneaking off from work to go play darts.

Well, in my defense, it's just something to do
to pass the time while I'm drinking beer.

Yes, Angie
mentioned that, too.

What?

You ratted me out on my
midday dart-and-booze?

What? No, I just thought
it was a funny story.

Steven, I'm so sorry.
Daddy, please don't fire him.

I'm not gonna fire him.

You're not?
I mean...

you're not--
excellent choice.

S teven,

you may be the boss' son, but you
still have to show up and do some work.

Come on, man, even you said yourself it
was fine if I slack off every now and then.

Look, I want you to succeed here,
Steven, so no more darts.

Fine.

Oh, but can I start
succeeding next week?

See, there's a tournament tomorrow.
I'm already signed up and everything.

There's my little
roller disco king.

Mom !

Look, at any given moment, there at least three kids in
this house who would use that information to destroy me.

We have to keep
it our secret.

Well,

I was just
reading the bible,

and it says that keeping
secrets is a sin.

It goes lust, gluttony,
sloth, keeping secrets.

Mom, we don't even
have a bible.

Remember last christmas you spilled
peppermint schnapps all over it?

Honey, just share
your secret.

People are gonna find out
eventually because

that is a surprisingly difficult
thing to keep secret.

Okay, I don't know
if you know this about me,

but I already take quite a bit of crap just
walking around being regular me, so,

No, I'm not gonna
tell anybody.

Do you want me
to tell them?

- No.
- Yes?

No.

I'll think about
it, okay?

Maybe there's a way I can
kind of feel everybody out.

Good.

and by the way,

I did not spill peppermints
chnapps on the bible.

It was sambuca.
I am not trailer trash.

I know something
you don't know.

Fez, you know a lot
of things I don't know,

mostly because they're disgusting
and I don't wanna know them.

True,

but this is
about eric.

What do you think he's doing every
wednesday night when he's not with you?

He's taking an at-home
spanish course.

He doesn't wanna be disturbed,
so he locks himself in his room.

You know, I think he's self-conscious
because he can't roll his "R"s.

Oh, believe me, donna,

he is rolling his ass off.

Okay, fez,
what's going on?

Is there another woman?

Yes...

and it's eric.

Angie totally set
me up, man.

I should have seen this coming when
I found out she was a math major.

Those girls are
always bitches.

You know what
your problem is, hyde?

I'm too good-looking.

Who does angie think
she is, anyway?

She can't just walk in here and pull your
strings like you're some kind of puppet.

That's my job.

Hey, guys, just to jump
off topic here for a sec,

when you're dancing to say,like,

Donna Summer,
whoever,

do you ever wish that
you were on wheels?

Forman,

so many parts of what you just said
make me wanna kick your ass.

Eric,

you know what
your problem is?

I'm too good-looking.

Okay, it's wednesday night, so you guys know what
that means-- off to my room for a little espa�ol,

or should I say off
to my room-o?

You got a lot of nerve
showing up here.

All right, back
off, hyde.

She's here for me.

Hey, mama.

Hey, so what the hell
was that all about today?

Look,

my dad said that if I did well in college,
some day the business would be mine,

and I did my part,

so there's no way I'm gonna share everything
with some frizzy-haired kid fresh out of juvie.

Okay, I'm working at that company
because our dad wants me there,

and don't insult me
with that juvie crap.

I'm over 18. If I get pinched,
I'm doing big boy time.

Running this company is my dream,
so if you don't quit tomorrow,

it's gonna be war.

He's your friend. Talk
some sense into him.

If you wanted my help, you should
have brought more cupcakes.

Fez, come on. Just tell
us what eric's up to.

Donna, if I learned anything
from all my years as a virgin,

it's that seeing it is much
better than talking about it.

what the hell
was that?

That, donna,

that's what's left
of your boyfriend.

So, steven, what are you
gonna do about angie?

How are you
gonna fight back?

I don't know that I am.

I mean, you're asking me
to fight for a job.

That's a tough sell.

But this is my
company at stake.

Jackie, would you stop saying
that everything that's mine is yours?

Okay, steven, last valentine's day I gave you
a card that said "be mine," and you said yes.

And by saying yes,

you agreed that everything you had, have or will
have from now until the end of time is mine as well.

Read the fine
print, steven.

This whole work thing is a mess. I
miss my glory days of being an orphan.

A little piece of advice
about having a family--

get used to being
screwed over.

Well, that's a very
cynical view of family.

Oh, yeah,

and you and your sister
get along so well.

Oh, I talked to a lawyer.
She's not getting a damn thing.

Red, we have
something to tell you.

It's pretty shocking.

I'm not sure how
to break it to you.

Okay, you'd better
let me handle this.

All right,

Everybody whose son

is not a roller disco-er, take one
step forward. Not so fast, red.

Someone's been working
on their spin, susie.

Nice, very nice.

It's magic time.

Hey, everybody, let's give a great
bigroller palace welcome to the one,

the only rainbow!

nice shorts, rainbow.

Hey,

did you come up
to pack up your office?

Listen, sis, about
the whole job thing,

I thought about going head-to-head with you,
but I decided I just can't stoop to your level.

Well, good.

But she can.

Right now she's telling
everybody we work with

that you stripped your
way through college.

Please, like anybody's
gonna believe her.

My dad's rich.

Oh, no, no, no. You didn't strip
because you needed the money.

Word around the
water cooler is

you stripped
because you liked it.

Yeah, I know, I know.
What a whore.

Stop laughing at me.

I am not a stripper.
I am a math major.

Jackie,

if there was ever a game show
called "make that girl cry,"

I'd go on with you.

Oh, we'd so
win the car.

all right, everybody
clear some space.

It's rainbow!

Now look, eric,
they love you,

so it's a good
thing I told fez.

I didn't tell you
I told fez.

I didn't tell fez.

Eric, how did
this happen?

I mean, you don't just wake up one morning, throw on
some skates, and start doing cartwheels to sister sledge.

It all started when I went down
to the sporting goods store.

I saw this pair of roller skates,
and when I tried them on,

well, it was like the first time
Joe Namath laid his hands on a bat.

The next thing I can
remember is spinning,

just spinning and
spinning and spinning.

When I finally stopped,
I found myself at the park.

That's where I met
up with these people.

Wait, those skate freaks that hang
out down by the basketball court?

Every time we wanna shoot hoops, we
gotta scare them off with bottle rockets.

Kelso, they're not freaks.
They're just like you and me,

but on wheels.

Eric,

let me tell you
a little story.

When I was a boy, there was a kid
who wanted to be a ballet dancer,

and all the other kids
made fun of him.

But years later when he came back
to town, he had achieved his dream--

he was a dancer

with the New York City Ballet.

And you know
what happened?

You learned your little lesson
about judging people unfairly, huh?

No, a bunch of guys got together
and beat the crap out of him.

Hey, red,

you know what
your problem is?

I'm too good-looking.

Okay, dad, I hear
what you're saying,

but I honestly don't
know if I can give it up.

Why don't you try
something else?

I suggest robot dancing.

feel the beat.
Disco robot.

Daddy,

I can't work with him.
He's telling lies about me.

Actually, that's not true.

She's telling them.

Steven, why is that girl
always in the office?

And why has she been passing out
dress code memos to my employees?

Hum... Well,

she's against the casualization
of the workplace.

She doesn't belong here,
and neither does he.

I can't believe
what I'm seeing--

a brother and sister
fighting each other.

Hey, we are a family.

Look, if you want him to stay, that's fine.
But if he stays, I'm out of here.

Well, that's too bad, because I'm opening up a new
record store and I wanted the two of you to run it,

but maybe I'll just let
Steven run it by himself.

Hell yeah!

Nice going, sis.

No. You know I've always
wanted my own store.

Well, if you two can't find
a way to work this out--

We can. I know we can.
He's my brother.

I tried to get him fired, he calls
me a stripper-- this is how we play.

Well, I'm glad, because
if this kept going,

I would have had to send the two of you
to your offices without any dinner.

That's a bad joke.
I love it.

So

looks like you're gonna have
to put up with me after all.

Hey, I said I'd work with you.
It doesn't mean I like you.

You not liking me doesn't bother me
that much now that I won.

And by "I won,"

I mean you lost.

Oh, and also...

you know, here I'm
just an average kid,

but down there...

down there I was a star.

what?

Oh, did I make the kissy
face too early again?

No, no, it's nothing.

What?

Why do you keep
laughing at me?

I'm gonna go home

and I'm gonna watch a really sad movie
and I'm gonna try to come back later.