Original subtitles

It's a squirrel.

That squirrel's gonna go...

Get it. Get it.

Get it.

It's a squirrel.

Go. Go.

Don't play with it.

I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it.

Eat it.

We're wild animals, me and you.

We're wild.

Come here.

Come here.

Okay, piggyback.

The reintroduction was always for one reason.

That was to put a wildcat back into the wild again.

But it's just hard.

It's hard to let go of something you love.

Especially when you're letting him go into, like,

one of the most dangerous environments in the world.

Private Harry Turner is just 18,

one of the youngest soldiers here.

He only finished training in March and is now on a six-month tour.

My mum was a little bit, like,

shocked because she thought I was only going to be out here

for two weeks, but nah, my mum, dad, they're all supportive about it.

I was medically discharged

with recurrent depression and PTSD.

After Afghanistan, I struggled so badly.

I felt that life wasn't worth living

and maybe I should just pack up all of my things

and just go where no one knows where I am,

no one knows if I'm alive, no one knows if I'm dead.

And then when I met Sam,

that's when my life really took a turn.

You know, when I came across Harry,

he was extremely misunderstood.

This, you know, boy who went to war instead of going to college,

which is what a lot of people see when they look at him.

But I obviously saw something super special in him.

He spent his time in the jungle

volunteering and helping me with, like, this greater cause.

Just carrying a sloth on my back through the jungle.

Gonna get him back, give him some food, put him back up a tree.

Sam could've easily stayed at home and just studied at university.

You know, the usual.

But she was out there in the jungle, physically doing it.

I started Hoja Nueva after I first came to Peru.

I came as a student to do wildlife research.

Yeah, look how big these are.

Huge ocelot.

Poop, poop, poop, poop.

And I stayed because I saw a need

not just for research but for being a part of the conservation efforts as a whole.

I'm saying I'm going to pay five dollars per sample collected of cat scat.

Now, that is how you motivate people.

Right? Am I right?

And it's just morphed and-and grown a lot since then.

We as an NGO

try very hard to prevent deforestation and hunting.

It's a Peruvian nonprofit, and it's a place that

animals that don't have another chance can come to.

Hi!

Hi! Hi!

Hi, I'm Samantha. I'm good, you?

Nice to meet you.

You have a family of animals. I like it a lot.

It's like my family.

I think it will take time to be wild again,

but little by little he can.

Let's see.

Banana.

Yeah? Okay.

It's okay.

We get animals because of things like logging, mining,

wildlife trafficking, people selling animals in markets.

And we have to do what we can to get the younger animals rehabilitated.

Their alternative is living in a cement box

or getting euthanized

or dying in a much worse way.

Billy!

They live, basically, in larger herds on the other side of the river from us,

but we're still gonna try to reintroduce him

because pigs are quite easy in that way.

He never had a mama. You can tell.

You can always tell when they've never had a mama.

He's a baby.

Baby paca-rana.

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

It's hard to describe, like,

the feeling of being in a place that still has beauty like this.

Being around animals, being around nature,

not having that many people around.

Harry, what you looking at?

- Oh, you got a leaf in your hair. - Oh.

Oh, my God!

I've seen the jungle here change people.

Whoa!

Harry, no.

Oh, my God!

Three, two, one.

We became, you know, a team,

best friends and partners,

and when Khan came into our hands,

that's when my life really had a purpose.

Yesterday we rescued him

from some illegal loggers.

He was in a tree that they cut down.

We've named him Khan.

We're gonna try and do a reintroduction program with him.

It was an incredible feeling to know

that this animal wasn't gonna be going onto the black market,

to know that its claws weren't gonna be clipped

or its teeth weren't gonna be ground down.

No more biting of the face.

Good baby. Good baby!

Khan.

- You want to go to Daddy? - Khan.

- Good boy. - You got it.

The goal was always that Khan would be a wild ocelot.

That it was better than living a life in the zoo.

Good boy.

I started doing all the research possible

to come up with a reintroduction plan.

Come join Mummy up in the tree.

Good boy.

The biggest kind of challenge was

no one had done it before.

They've never actively spent time with a wildcat for a year,

a year and a half, two years, and then reintroduced it.

It's just never been done.

Mosquitoes are bad tonight, as you can tell.

But I just found this little dude.

Khan.

He's here.

Where is it?

Did you lose it?

Right, when you get something, you have to kill it.

You have to.

Otherwise, you're gonna die out here.

I didn't know if it was gonna be doable,

but Sam had a lot of faith in me.

I don't think there's anyone that's better-suited for this project.

It doesn't matter if you come from an academic background

or you have a master's or a PhD.

Most people couldn't survive here.

A lot of people come down and do research projects

that last three months and can't even usually last that long,

living day-to-day in the Amazon rain forest.

So, Harry's history and experience with being in harsh environments,

it makes him suited for this project.

He can smell something.

I'm gonna have to teach Khan that this caiman here can be food.

It's moving.

Okay.

Khan got bitten by him, so now he's a bit scared of...

He doesn't know what to do.

Khan, you've got to grab the neck.

I've got him.

Good boy.

Good boy. Good boy.

I'd like to say a huge thank-you for the amount of support that we've had

through the Khan ReWilding project.

Um, we would not be able to do this without you at all,

and he is growing up very, very quickly.

He's getting very, very boisterous.

And soon,

hopefully, he'll be off in the wild by himself.

Look how fat this little bugger is.

Look at your belly!

It really just makes me think, "You're okay, you know?

"This... this world that you live in is...

isn't so bad after all."

He's saving me, and I'm saving him.

- Good boy. - Khan.

Okay.

Ow! That's my ear.

These claws there...

fucking size of them go into you.

Ow. Fucking hell.

He clawed me straight in the fucking face.

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah! The ear.

Ah, shit.

I'm recording this so that...

No, that's my hat.

Because, when I miss you,

when I'm back in England,

I can look back on this video and think what a little shit he was.

Khan, where are you?

Shit!

Hi. Hi.

You're okay.

Come here.

My poor boy.

My poor boy is so fucked.

His fucking front paw's hanging off.

It's okay, boy.

The vets are on their way.

I was walking with Khan.

There was a gun which has a bit of string that triggers it

when something walks in front of it

that hunters put out.

Shot him in the front leg.

I'm trying to keep positive,

but I'm so fucking angry and sad at the same time.

And in my head, I keep thinking,

"Right, he's gonna be okay, he's gonna be okay."

I don't know what to do.

When Khan died, he became closed off.

He told me that he would never find the capacity

to love anything again the way that he loved Khan.

Yeah. He used to write letters all the time.

I don't think I would go a day without, like, coming back and having, like,

a poem or a letter, like, waiting on my bed.

I think that Khan's death kind of killed any happiness

that he had built up over the two years before that.

He's a totally different person now.

It took me, like...

...a good two hours to get out of bed.

It only kind of slowly occurred to me

that there was, like, a much deeper darkness.

And that was what worried me the most...

That Harry would react in a way that would be harmful to himself.

We just got a message on the sat phone

from a friend in the community of Lucerna.

They're holding a baby ocelot that they've gotten

from some loggers passing downriver.

This will be the... the first time that this kind of call has come in since Khan.

Hello.

Thank you.

Thank you.

1.64 pounds.

All right, he can get a full .5 milliliters of both of these, so...

Ooh.

Hey.

This little dude is Keanu,

and...

He is our second ocelot rescue.

He will be reintroduced into the wild in about a year and a half,

and he will be a very aggressive wildcat.

Because of what happened to Khan,

we are planning on moving Keanu.

Moving him to, um, a larger, safer, more remote area.

Great.

Tres, dos, uno.

This is where I'm gonna live from now on.

This is me, this is permanent,

and I'm gonna be here until, um... until Keanu leaves.

This is your new home.

Let's see how you like it.

Eh?

Don't give up. Don't give up.

I gotcha. I gotcha.

Want some milk?

I know that my life's gonna get very hard in the next few months

with him growing big and strong,

and...

I just hope I can be strong for him, you know?

Where is he?

There he is.

Hey, Keanu.

Let's go on a walk.

Come on, let's go.

I feel like...

the Keanu project is gonna be a success because of Khan.

Everything that I'd learned with Khan

is now gonna be put into action with Keanu.

But, then again, Keanu is a different cat.

You just farted.

I love you so much, but you stink.

Such a little kitten still, running through the jungle

and, like, attacking leaves and stuff.

I can't wait to see him when he's...

when he's about three months older,

when he's just stalking animals.

It's gonna be great.

Mm-hmm.

- Big male ocelot. - Oh, shit.

That's a big male.

Look at the fucking size of his front arms.

Look at the size of his balls.

Holy crap.

He's gonna be a problem.

We know that breeding programs

and then setting a bunch of cats free in the jungle does not work.

So, if this is successful and Keanu survives,

I think that people will gain that respect for us as carnivore scientists,

as people who work directly with carnivores,

that we'll hopefully be the first people that they call,

that they think of, when they capture that kind of animal.

It's okay now. Come on over.

Do you have a protocol?

Yes.

We had to make one because there wasn't one before.

There wasn't one.

He likes to walk a lot,

so he walks with Keanu two or three times every day and night.

He walks at night?

Yes, they walk like seven hours every day and night.

And he doesn't get away?

No, no, because he likes to learn from Harry

and he's comfortable with Harry.

Should we go back?

- Let's go. - Yeah.

I grew up thinking I was gonna study wolves

and get a PhD in wolf ecology

and protect all the wolves in the United States.

And then you slowly realize that,

I mean, there's very little that can be done

because of, you know, politics and everything else,

whereas I, as, like, an individual,

actually had some power to contribute to change here.

¡Hola!

- Samantha! - Yes?

Lola, Neron, and Bobby have fleas.

So you use this for fleas.

You put it on their backs.

Thank you, Sam.

- Oh, look. - A kitten!

His eye is a little infected,

so you have to clean it with warm water.

Nowadays, I don't see you anymore.

What's happening in your life?

I have to travel frequently to the States now

because I just have one year left to finish my doctorate.

And they're like, "Samantha, you have to write,

you can't spend all your time in Peru."

I've got my PhD that I'm trying to finish this year,

which my advisory committee really wants me to be in Seattle full-time,

and so it's just, I think I'm being pulled from a lot of different directions,

and I just feel bad that I can't be here all the time this year.

Is that how long could you hold that for?

- Hmm? - I thought we was doing

the "how long can we hold that kiss for?"

Oh.

Four seconds.

Hmm?

Let me know when you get to America, okay?

Mm-hmm.

- Take it easy. - Mm-hmm.

Look what I've got you.

Hey, this.

This.

This is good food, good protein.

He's getting big.

He's getting beautiful.

And, uh, yeah, hopefully in the next month or so,

I'm gonna start taking him out

so he can start eating outside the enclosure

and, uh, catch some cool animals.

I'm gonna teach you how to become a killer.

Okay?

Amazon tree boa.

Remember this. Common snake.

This is the snake.

You see it? You smell it?

I've got it.

Look here.

This insect here.

Here.

Look.

There's a frog right there.

Frog, right there.

I just did all my washing.

Because the sun was out.

Hey, Keanu.

This way. Come on.

This way.

You know what lives in the water? Hmm?

You know what lives in the water? Caiman.

And one day, I'm gonna teach you how to kill a caiman.

I'm trying to teach Keanu that...

he can fucking eat this, you know?

And he's just playing... Like, I don't understand what…

You grab it by the head.

That's what you do... you grab it.

What is it?

What are you doing?

It's food.

I made such a mess of everything.

You were just a happy kid.

I guess I fixed that, huh?

The sweat bees are attacking our faces.

Just absolutely covered.

He's now been playing with this dead mouse opossum

for like 25 minutes now, and...

the mosquitoes have... they're driving me a little bit insane.

Eat it. Eat it.

Just eat your rodent.

My body is beaten right now.

I'm-I'm sick constantly.

Oh, that might have been poo.

Oh, no. I think I pooped myself.

And I still have months ahead of me.

Keanu, come here.

We need to go back 'cause Harry doesn't feel great.

Hey, come on.

No, no, don't lay in it.

Follow me. Good boy.

I've not seen my little brother in 15 months.

I don't even know how tall he is anymore.

Don't even know what size shoe he is.

Like, I-I can be like, "Oh, yeah, I'm doing these great things,"

and I'm in the jungle, but...

I'm also missing out on everything,

missing out on all my friends' and family's lives.

Based on, like, all of my notes

and some habitat data, I did the road kind of versus trail and...

Larger predators like cats provide stabilizing functions within ecosystems.

We know they increase biodiversity.

The proceeds from tonight are benefiting Hoja and the work that we do.

My name is Samantha Zwicker.

I am the founder of Hoja Nueva.

What brought me to the Amazon was wildlife.

I've always been inspired, felt connected to wildlife, wild animals.

I think when I made this, I mean, of course, I loved all animals,

and I had an affinity for cat species, but at that point, I didn't know

that I wanted to work in conservation.

I loved biology. I thought I was gonna be

a biologist or a zoologist.

What?

- When I'm around animals, I feel like... - I love you.

...I can actually be myself and be happy,

whereas being in my family, I was kind of always on pins and needles

about, like, what was gonna happen that night.

Sammy gonna love Harley?

Give Harley a kiss?

I think growing up, I just had s-such a connection

to each of the animals that I had

that made me trust them more than I trusted other people in my life.

- Are you recording? - Uh-huh.

- Sammy? - Mom, what's this?

Sammy.

Mees!

What?

Can you say, "I love you, Daddy"?

I love you, Daddy.

- Sammy. - What?

Say, "I love you, Daddy."

I love you, Daddy.

You better.

Growing up, going to dinner was

such a horrible experience with my dad,

whether it was, like, him throwing things,

you know, like, hitting me across the table

or, you know, like, just, like, horrible experiences,

something so simple as going to dinner with your family.

Come on!

Alcoholism makes people say and do really horrible things.

Hey.

We would actually play a game of, like, counting my dad's shots,

and he always landed around 27 a night.

But...

He was also one of the most kind of playful dads.

Like, a lot of, like, wrestling games.

He always spent a lot of time with us.

Look at that top!

Oh, my gosh!

Oh, no, look! No, look at that!

I was scared of him, but at the same time,

I knew it wasn't him, if that makes sense.

Like, from a really young age, like, I-I could separate

the person that he was when he was drunk from the person that he really was.

There she is, the woman of my dreams.

But my mom and I have this, like...

we have the same, like, tick...

Like, this, like, thing that keeps telling us

to, like, not give up on someone,

because there is that small chance

that what you're doing is making a difference.

And...

And, yeah, I mean, that's the last thing

that my dad ever said to me was: "Thank you for not giving up on me."

- Hello? - Hi.

Are you okay? What's going on, Harry?

I don't know.

I'm just... I'm just struggling.

You still think you'll be here Friday or Saturday?

Harry, you cut out.

I'm here. Can you hear me?

When I was in Afghanistan,

I had to stop this person

from going to bury his child.

And when I lifted up that blanket

and I saw that little girl's hand that was just full of blood...

...and then there's my hands, right?

I lifted that blanket up, and I had my gloves on,

and I had a gun, and I had...

grenades and everything on me.

And then that poor innocent child was on that bike,

and it's like...

I have no right to be here.

It occurred to me today that no matter where I am,

who I'm with, what I'm doing,

I'm always gonna have this fucking problem up here.

I'm in the most beautiful place in the world,

and I can't fucking be happy.

Samantha! Samantha!

- I missed you. - I missed you, too.

Yeah.

Mum, wake up.

Mum, I'm gonna scratch my butt on your face.

Wake up.

Mum, wake up.

Okay. I'm already awake, Max.

Kiki?

Mum's here.

Is that my boy? Is that my boy?

Are you bigger?

Coming back now,

seeing how large he is and how, like, confident and how he's, like,

slightly standoffish, you know, we want him to get to the point

where he doesn't want to see me,

he doesn't want to know me, he doesn't want to have a connection with me.

He's becoming so independent

that it's best that the-the relationship that he has

is just with a single person, which is me.

We have to make that, like, line that says,

"Okay, you only can trust this one person,"

because he needs to realize that people are dangerous.

He had this way already of communicating with Keanu

and teaching him, and you could just see that relationship of mother and son.

Keanu.

Come here.

Good boy. How you doing?

Are you hungry?

You're hungry, aren't you?

That's okay. We'll get some food, huh?

Let's go get some rodents. Come on.

Let's go do it.

Don't bite me, all right?

Just pissed on me.

That's great.

Come on, Keanu.

Got to be quicker than that, mate.

Hey!

Keanu, right there.

Keanu.

Keanu almost just caught his first rodent.

He ran after it, but he didn't manage to get it.

He was so close, though.

He caught his first rodent. He caught his first rodent!

I'm so happy. I'm so happy.

Mmm, tasty?

Good boy. I'm proud of you.

I love you.

Ooh, ooh. Thank you for that kiss.

All right, we'll go back.

Try to find some food on the way.

You looking? I am.

Keanu, that's a wandering spider.

Jesus.

No, that-that's dangerous.

That's a wandering spider.

You see the threat of that wandering spider there?

That's dangerous, dude.

You okay? Did he get you on the nose?

Keanu.

Hey.

You okay?

Keanu?

Talk to me.

Are you okay?

It's okay. It's okay.

I've got to go get Mummy, okay?

I've got to go get Mummy.

Fuck's sake.

I'll be back.

Give me two seconds, okay?

I'll be back.

Fuck me.

Keanu was bit by a Brazilian wandering spider,

and he had partial... partial paralysis

and, um, slowed breathing,

and, um, his heart rate started going up really, really fast.

Um, and after about an hour and a half now,

he's starting to get a little bit better.

Um, definitely the biggest scare that we've had

since starting this project.

You doing better, eh?

Hey. I know, it still hurts.

I feel like he's putting so much on this project with Keanu

that it's almost like his redemption.

And part of me is like... of course, I-I mean,

I want Keanu to be successful for so many reasons,

but one of the main reasons I want him to be successful is because

I want Harry to finally be able to move on.

Last night, I heard a gunshot. Tonight, I've heard a gunshot.

I need to find out who it is.

I need to find out where they're hunting.

I need to find out what they're hunting.

I hate gunshots now.

A shotgun, for sure.

We still know that people hunt with illegal shotgun traps.

There are still all of these things that,

after what happened to Khan, deeply scare us even more now.

And it's really difficult working in an unprotected area.

This region is known for deforestation from logging practices,

about 89% which are illegal.

Hear the chain saw clearer now?

That's extremely close to our border.

I heard the chain saw, and I come up here... chain saw stops.

This is what you'll find all around here.

Just full of shotgun shells.

We came across a group of guys cutting the tree.

You know, told them that they were on our land and they needed to leave.

But it was too late, obviously.

This is a almost 1,000-year-old lupuna that was already cut.

The quickest way for someone to make money here

is usually mining or-or logging.

And so you can't really point fingers at the people who are actively cutting,

because they aren't usually the ones that are involved

in all these international dealings.

There are so many challenges that you face in conservation,

and this is one of them.

I can still hear that chain saw in the west.

Fuck, I can hear that chain saw getting louder.

I'm having to put him back,

even though he does not want it, because this is more important.

I'll be back. We'll go on a walk tonight.

I don't know.

I have no idea where this chain saw's coming from.

I feel so...

I can't even explain it.

I just feel like I'm not in control of my own self right now.

I can't control my anger or my hate or my...

I can't control anything right now.

I kind of just want to cut myself.

He genuinely believes that cutting himself

and, like, seeing blood, feeling the pain

and, like, the tingling, as he calls it,

he genuinely feels that that helps him to get over a panic attack.

Um, or to get over his rage.

And for me,

I-I have a worry about, like,

how much worse it could've gotten if he didn't calm down.

After Afghanistan, I was in such a bad place,

I didn't really think about what I was doing,

and I tried to kill myself in my bedroom.

Yeah, and-and I woke up,

and I just felt ridiculous.

I didn't want my little brother to find his older brother dead.

Say hello, Jayden.

- Hello, Jayden. - Hello!

When I was 13, my brother came into the picture.

Big, strong tiger.

And he really changed my life.

I really, you know, wanted him to look up to me,

and I really wanted to take care of him.

It's Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince!

Look.

- Wow! - Are you happy?

Yeah? Good.

I did not want my little brother to... to see his brother in pain anymore.

And that's why I booked a flight to the jungle.

I was just pissed off and wanted to... just wanted to, like, feel some pain.

I hardly bled. I didn't want to bleed.

I didn't want to cut myself deeply.

You're clearly just like...

disappointed in me.

I'm not disappointed, Harry.

You just worry me.

Lidia! I'm going to leave this bottle of wine.

It's for Harry's parents.

They're coming for the first time tomorrow.

They are going to come with his brother.

He's thirteen.

- Are they coming tomorrow? - They're coming tomorrow.

Okay, perfect. Thank you.

See you tomorrow.

For a year and a half,

I've only heard their voices on the satellite phone.

And that's like once a month.

What do you think it's gonna be like when you see them?

It's gonna be really nice.

This is probably the furthest we've ever

- been away from civilization. - Definitely.

Bet it's gonna be great when my little brother

can see an anaconda.

He loves insects as well, so I caught a massive tarantula the other day,

and I... all I could think about was how, like...

how Jayden would just love it.

Harry!

- Mum wants first hug. - Mum gets first hug.

I call seconds!

- How you doing? - I'm good. How are you?

Oh, I'm all right.

Jesus, Harry, I'm so impressed.

12 years in the Navy, I've never seen driving like his.

- Here. - Okay.

So, we've got the master bedroom?

- Yes, you do. - Is that right?

At least we've got walls.

A little bit of privacy.

Right here, if you're going to the bathroom

and you don't want anyone else to join,

- you can just put this little... - Oh!

- ...string up right here. - Okay.

Oh, fucking hell.

Oh, Jay, I made you a fishing rod.

- Thank you. - And a machete.

Wait, what do you mean, made me a machete?

Well, it was broken, so I made it into a mini machete.

- That's huge! - What do you mean, "that's huge"?

It was this long, and it was snapped off,

so then I decided to chip it off with a hammer

and then make a little machete for you.

Thank you.

All right, okay.

I need to walk Keanu, and you're probably gonna go to bed.

Um, don't know when I'll come back, so good night.

I've come to give you some food so that tomorrow

we can go out and get some videos

so I can show my family.

My family are here.

Your grandparents are here!

There's a big caiman here, dude.

Could be dangerous.

Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh. Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh.

No. No.

Uh-uh. No.

Don't do it. Do not do it.

Fucking hell.

Holy shit, I'm shaking.

You doing okay, man?

You okay?

You scared the shit out of me.

You scared the shit right out of me.

So, what do your friends think about you coming out here?

They've started calling me Mowgli.

Mowgli?

- You haven't got the hair for it. - I know.

They jealous?

No, not really.

They're like, "Why would you want to go to a place

"with no, um, Internet, no nothing?"

"I'd rather just go to Florida."

- That bloody generation, huh? - Yeah.

Did you bring your iPhone?

- No. - You left it.

- I brought an iPod so I could listen to music. - Mm.

You hear what that... you hear that...

That was a hummingbird.

They, like, fly through the house.

- What's that? - Termite nest, yeah.

Tree termites.

There's termites everywhere.

We had to put diesel in this platform

because the termites come up and try to eat everything.

What are these?

- Scars? - Yeah.

These ones up here, all these cuts from up here are from Keanu.

This, like, blotch here and, like, here is where I got burnt by the acid.

Oh, acid? Did that heal all right, did it?

Yeah, it healed all right.

I had one bit that was in my hand, which was... got infected, but...

And how'd you get those ones, the stripes?

Um, some were from Keanu and some were from myself.

- Hmm. - Painful?

Yeah.

Um, so I-I didn't know whether you guys wanted to go fishing.

- Do you want to go fishing, Jay? - Yeah.

Okay. Cool.

Oh, my God!

Go. Go, go, go.

Ah, we're gonna crash!

See? Perfect.

That's definitely Jayden's dinner.

So, hold the fin like that.

- You think you're gonna be all right? - Oh. Yeah.

- What? - I'm sinking!

Do it. Dive in!

No!

All right.

- My God. - Oh, my God.

Wow.

Oh, my God, I tell you what,

Disneyland's never gonna be the same again, is it?

Whoo!

Amazing bugs in this part of the world.

Wait, that's a praying mantis.

I haven't even seen a praying mantis at a pet shop.

Really?

Oh, my God.

- Is it a vicious one? - No.

It's called a blunt headed tree snake.

Okay, this is officially the coolest day of my life.

Oh, look at that.

- Hey. - How'd it go?

- We saw nothing. - Zero.

The only things we saw

were, um, two different types of snake,

- four different types of tarantulas... - What? What?

...a frog, a whip scorpion.

Did you have the best time ever?

Oh, here. Look at this, right?

- What is it? - It's a tarantula.

He... he grabbed it and went like this and threw it on me.

I'm sad that you're going to be leaving tomorrow.

I'm sad I'm gonna be leaving.

The best holiday of my life.

Go on.

You guys are gonna be heading soon, so...

Lovely seeing you again, mate.

Good to see you.

- I love you, man. - I love you.

- Take it easy. - Uh-huh.

All right. I love you.

Mwah.

I'm really proud of you.

- I'm glad you enjoyed it. - I've really enjoyed it.

- Yeah. - It's been brilliant.

I've been really impressed with what you've achieved.

It's an amazing story.

Oh. Thanks, Jay.

- I'll see you soon, okay? Yeah. - See you soon. Yeah.

Um, can I ask one thing, though?

When I come back, can you make chicken pie for me?

- 'Cause that's all I crave. - Of course I can.

- That's all I crave. - Of course.

The funny thing is I cut these onions and garlics,

and my fingers smell like your chicken pie.

And I walk around the jungle with my light next to my face

just thinking about your chicken pie all the time.

Don't get upset.

I'll see you soon, all right?

- I love you lots. - Love you, too.

You take care of you.

Of course.

No crying. You make me cry.

I wasn't...

I wasn't going to.

You guys coming made him so happy.

I got it from here. Don't worry.

You enjoy your, uh, next week ahead of you.

Adios.

Bye, guys.

Travel safe, yeah?

Aw, look at Jayden. He's still waving.

Aw, he's still waving.

Hey.

Come on.

Around 14 months is when he starts leaving his mother.

I see the next few months

being a big separation period.

I'm gonna miss you, man.

I'm gonna miss you so much.

He's aggressive. He's ferocious.

He's feisty and mean.

Watch out.

Watch out. It's gonna bite ya.

Watch out.

He's eating, hunting, you know, doing what an ocelot should do.

Cristian, Niery.

Tomorrow I'm going to the United States.

It's possible that I'll be back in September.

If there's something urgent just let me know.

Okay, bye!

See you later.

Bye, guys.

Good luck.

For him to become truly wild,

I need to let him be alone.

I need to give him some freedom.

There's an egg for you there.

But that's it.

No more.

Now, don't follow me.

Eat your egg. Don't follow me.

It's the first night he's ever spent out of his enclosure, full night.

I feel a little bit lonely

knowing that he's gone, for now.

Just the fact that you've had something in your life for so many months,

and then... it's, you know, relied on you,

and now he's old enough to go.

What if this is the last time I ever see him?

'Cause there aren't really any guidelines for this.

We're just having to make it up.

It's just tough knowing that I'm not his safety net anymore.

He's not here. He's not been back.

That's the male we have a problem with,

and he was here last night.

Me.

Fuck.

Uh, the next camera's just up here.

Oh!

Keanu's here at 7:21 a.m.

Kiki?

7:21.

I know it's him.

I'm gonna walk the stream trail.

Hey, Keanu.

Hello, mate. Hello, mate.

You've done so good.

Oh, my God.

I fucking love you so much.

Tell me I'm being an idiot.

Tell me I'm being an idiot.

Oh, dear me.

Uh-uh, not my laptop, not my laptop.

Not my laptop.

You spent the whole night out, mate.

I'm so proud of you, man.

We got to do it again tonight.

Cristian.

You cleaned.

That was a long trip, eh?

How you doing?

Did you paint that thing on your lip?

It's my mustache.

I'm growing a mustache.

This is fucking like 22 days in the... in the making.

- Get out of here. - What?

You painted that. There's no way you can actually grow that.

- Yeah. - Oh, my God.

I'm... This is my Movember.

- I'm starting it in... in August. - Okay. Okay, cool.

This is the first... the video of Keanu on the camera trap for that...

he was out the whole night.

- Okay. - So he was there at 7:21,

and then I come and I check the thing at 8:17.

And then when I walk down that trail, that's when I find him.

- Gosh. - Yeah.

I like it. It's okay.

- No, you don't. - I like it!

Once he stopped keeping Keanu

in the enclosure during the day, like, that was huge.

I mean, for Keanu to be able to go in and out

and, like, to be just out in the jungle is... it seems crazy.

Like, we never got to that point with Khan. He was almost there.

He was within, like, a week of being that, but we weren't there.

Right, I'll see you in, um, 15, 20 minutes.

You-you heard him, right?

I definitely heard him.

He's just looking for Harry, I bet.

Harry?

Kiki, go on.

You can't be here. You know that.

You shouldn't be eating lemongrass.

It's just weird, him being, like, out of his enclosure.

It's like... now he knows, like, where Harry lives.

It's... so crazy.

Harry?

Last night was bad.

Keanu just kept coming back to the platform constantly.

Probably why he keeps coming back to the platform...

To tell me that he's hungry.

I can't... can't be that person for him anymore, though.

He needs to know that I'm not that person.

And I don't know how to tell him that.

- I don't know how to tell him to... - to move on.

I'll leave you.

This is how I feel.

This is how I feel.

This is how I feel when you come to the platform, okay?

Yes, I know.

You are an angry wild animal,

but you need to start acting like a wild animal.

You need to hunt more. You need to hunt more.

A mother ocelot would be brutal,

like, "You're ready. Goodbye.

I'm gonna go mate, and I'm gonna have more."

It's a totally different relationship.

Can't compare it.

Oh.

Oh, dear.

God, how did we not hear him over here?

He's just been coming forwards and backwards,

forwards and backwards from the platform.

He went into the rubbish bag.

He ate a load of plastic.

I-I went out into the jungle to look for him the other day,

and I found a pile of vomit with just, like, chewed up plastic bag.

And then he-he takes my towel,

and he bites a fucking hole in it.

Every fucking noise, I'm just like, "Fuck me, is he back?"

Go on!

He is so capable of going off by himself,

but he just won't, and I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

But it's now or never.

He's at the age where he needs to be leaving me.

So I need to do everything I can, whether that be forceful

or whether that be me getting angry or scaring him.

Get off of here! Go. Go.

Go!

This is bad.

Do not come up on here.

Keanu! Get away!

Get away!

Get away now!

Get away!

Away! Away!

Get away! Now!

Away.

He has had these moments of rage.

Basically, you're just telling me that

I am not doing the right things and I am wrong.

So I am fed up, and I take that gun 'cause I want to kill myself.

But then I think about Jayden,

I think about my mum and my dad and my sister,

and I think about Keanu more than anyone,

and I think about you and how that would affect you,

and I think, how selfish am I being?

I have to, like, almost think about it as two different people.

'Cause they really are.

Get off of there!

Get off of there now!

Get off.

I'm worried that he can't live by himself.

And if he can't live by himself, then f...

...the past...

the past 16 months, I've just...

just failed.

- Please Harry. - I need to do it.

I need to do it.

I need to, Sam.

Leave me alone.

I need to feel that pain, that adrenaline. I need to feel it.

Harry... Har-Harry!

Please.

That's what I needed.

You have reached the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.

We're here to help.

Hi. This is Lifeline.

Hi. Um, my name's Samantha.

I'm calling actually on behalf of a friend of mine.

What's going on, Samantha?

Yeah, so he... um, he's always been someone

who self-harms in different ways.

And I think, like, the first sign for-for me that things were changing was

he switched locations from cutting on the top of his arm,

and now he's cutting his wrists.

And the way that he's doing it is a lot more aggressive.

Um, he also talked last week about hanging himself

and, uh, taking, like, all the pills that he could find

basically in-in the platform where he stays.

And he hasn't really... he isn't... he hasn't talked like that for many years.

So, um...

If he's cutting himself and talking about killing himself,

he needs somebody to supervise him.

You need to go and talk to him and lay down some boundaries.

I mean, he's putting you through some emotional trauma as well

by not getting help.

And that's not fair to you.

Yeah.

I don't know the logistics behind getting him out of there,

but at the end of the day,

you don't want to support him continuing this behavior.

You want to support him getting help.

Right now he has lots of problems,

internal conflicts deep within himself

that he doesn't want to talk about with anyone.

It's possible that,

if he doesn't agree to leave in the next few weeks,

I'll have to tell him, as his friend,

but also as the person in charge of this project,

that he has to leave because he is not mentally stable.

No, I'm not fucking doing that,

because Keanu is more important than fucking anything

that I have ever fucking done!

Fucking stupid.

Fucking stupid.

He was basically like, "I don't know why"

"you would call that hotline.

"It's not a big deal.

"Maybe it was good for you and it's what you needed to do,

"but I wish you never would have told me,

because all it's made me is more upset and angry."

And he doesn't think that...

He knows he has a problem,

but he's not willing to do anything about it right now.

And that he's not ready to leave and no one can make him leave.

I only said one thing.

No, you fought about one thing. You caused a fight over one stupid thing.

One fucking thing!

Stop ruining shit.

I can ruin whatever the fuck I want.

No, you can't.

You can't ruin whatever the fuck you want.

He is the most important fucking thing to me right now.

You know, if he fucking dies right now,

if he goes off and I never see him again, you know how that's going to affect me?

I already lost one.

Right?

So did I.

You never fucking saw it.

You only heard it through my voice and through my tears.

And you don't think that was enough?

I don't think you know how hard it hurt me.

Everything that I'd ever fucking thought I'd got back, and I lost it all again.

I lost that huge chunk of me

when I was in the military and I saw all them dead children.

I saw that fucking poor girl get slaughtered in front of me.

And I come here, and I miraculously find something that makes me fucking happy...

You, the jungle, the two things that make me happy...

And I am lost right now.

I thought... I thought that I had a friend in the jungle, and I don't.

'Cause you...

...you don't want me here anymore.

You said, if Keanu wasn't here,

I'd have gone and you'd have got on with your life.

When people treat me like shit and with disrespect, like you have,

I don't feel like I want to be here and I don't feel like I'm your friend.

And I haven't felt like you're my friend.

I'm tired of feeling the way I feel around you.

Yeah, well, that makes two of us.

Everything I do hurts her.

Everything she does hurts me.

I feel like everything that we have to say to each other

is just to, like, blame or hurt the other person.

And, like, the things that I have to say to him at this moment

aren't things that would help, so I just keep them to myself.

We've been on the same road for a long time, and it's been a bumpy road.

And now I just want to turn left, and I just want her to turn right.

With Harry, I just felt like I was constantly trying to either save him

or save our relationship.

And that's not healthy.

Oh, no! Oh, my God.

Keanu?

Keanu?

Keanu?

Keanu.

Come on, mate, where are you?

It's been two nights now that he's not been here,

so why the sudden change?

I hope he's okay. I hope he's okay.

Where's he gone?

Keanu.

Fuck. Fuck.

Keanu.

Hey, Keanu.

What have you been doing?

I've not seen you for five days.

This is good, though.

You spent five days away.

Mm.

I'm glad you're okay.

Oh, it was so nice to see him.

I feel like I've done something good.

It's so... it's so stupid that I'm getting sad about this, but...

Oh, fuck.

I feel like I've done something right.

Oh, fucking man up, cunt.

All right.

Okay.

It's recording.

I'm gonna miss you, man.

Seriously.

There won't be a minute... a minute that goes by

where I'm not thinking about you.

But I need to leave.

I need to go.

But maybe I'll see you again.

But if I don't, then just know that I love you.

Because I do, man.

I love you with everything I've got.

This is lovely.

Thank you.

Hey.

Your teeth are too big for that now, you little shit.

Goodbye, man.

What time is it?

It's time to fucking go home.

Fuck.

God, it's fucking cold.

I'm not used to this fucking cold.

All right, I think that's them.

Yeah, that's them.

See how surprised they get.

Hey, you going to Pizza Hut without me?

What in the bloody hell?

What are you fucking doing here?

Oh, my God!

- How you doing? - Guess where we're going.

- Pizza Hut. - Yeah, without me.

You were gonna go without me.

What are you doing here?

Oh, my God.

- You all right? How you doing? - I thought it was next week.

Yeah, I lied to you.

- How you doing, mate? - Yeah, sorry, Mark.

Don't you ever do that again!

You all right, mate?

It's good to see you guys.

Yeah.

You're lucky you didn't lose your finger, though.

JAYDEN and HARRY: Three, two, one.

- Oh! - Hey.

But that's why I always check the edges, you know?

Don't want to kill one.

If you just give like extra 15 minutes, you might be able to save it.

It's still there.

I've had a lot of time to reflect.

I definitely realized, you know, like, I've always been really bad at, like,

letting people go that aren't good for me.

And, like, looking back,

having a dad that was both verbally and physically abusive,

and then the next morning, from 8:00 to 12:00,

was the nicest, calmest person

that would reel me back in by saying, "I'm sorry," and, like,

really show, like, who he truly was or who I thought he truly was.

You know?

And it's like I replicated that in my adult life.

It's a bit heavy.

After Harry left in December,

we just, uh, decided to stop clearing around the house.

Just to let it all grow.

Makes sense, you know, that the jungle eats it.

Eats the past.

We have cameras set up all along this trail and in the front of the house

to watch for if Keanu comes back so we can know if we're not here.

I think there's just, like, there's so much that's stored

inside a place like this.

And I think, on a personal level,

I just really wanted to have a space where I could start over.

Aw, that's a good boy.

Is it a boy or a girl?

- A girl. - It's a girl.

My first girl.

Your first girl.

You're doing great.

We named her Kleo, for Cleopatra.

Since she's just this powerful female force already,

so we thought it was perfect.

As it stands, I'm actually in a very good place mentally,

so I feel like now whenever, you know, I give my family that last hug,

it's only the last hug for now.

Holy shit, man.

I've never seen anything like this.

It's like I'm in a dream.

I still have negative thoughts, and I have bad days.

- Yay! - Woo-hoo!

But I have a bad day, and I think, "Harry, you was happy.

You can be happy."

Yay.

Don't rely on me.

Just relax. You can do it.

I'm already relying on you, and I feel like I'm going to fall off.

Oh, lovely.

Yeah, gorgeous.

But I definitely think about him every single day.

I have hope inside of my heart that he is out there still,

he has mated with a female

and now there's other little Keanus out there.

I'm proud to have got him to a point of where he did eventually go off.