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00:00:01,902 --> 00:00:02,970
(start-up chime sounds)
2
00:00:02,970 --> 00:00:05,539
(man humming)
3
00:00:05,539 --> 00:00:06,874
(groans)
4
00:00:06,874 --> 00:00:08,475
(grunting)
5
00:00:08,475 --> 00:00:09,710
(mouse clicks)
6
00:00:09,710 --> 00:00:11,879
Hmm. Hmm.
7
00:00:11,879 --> 00:00:12,746
Hmm!
8
00:00:12,746 --> 00:00:16,450
♪
9
00:00:16,450 --> 00:00:17,384
Hey, guys.
10
00:00:17,384 --> 00:00:19,987
It's your favorite
YouTube family vloggers:
11
00:00:19,987 --> 00:00:21,188
the Simpsons.
12
00:00:21,188 --> 00:00:23,056
Coinstar bought us a new house,
13
00:00:23,056 --> 00:00:26,393
and we're gonna give you
the grand tour.
14
00:00:26,393 --> 00:00:28,962
Come on in.
Take your shoes off first.
15
00:00:28,962 --> 00:00:32,399
All 50 million of you. (laughs)
16
00:00:32,399 --> 00:00:34,535
♪
17
00:00:34,535 --> 00:00:37,638
Now, we can't tell you
where the new house is located
18
00:00:37,638 --> 00:00:40,307
because we value our privacy.
19
00:00:40,307 --> 00:00:43,443
Which you know if you watched
our last family therapy sesh
20
00:00:43,443 --> 00:00:46,880
where Marge begged me to stop
filming our therapy seshes.
21
00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:48,615
Video link in bio.
22
00:00:48,615 --> 00:00:50,217
This is my favorite room
23
00:00:50,217 --> 00:00:53,787
because the kitchen is really
the heart of a home.
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00:00:53,787 --> 00:00:56,523
Also, because a robot cleans it.
25
00:00:56,523 --> 00:00:57,524
And check it out.
26
00:00:57,524 --> 00:01:01,361
The refrigerator
blends into the wall.
27
00:01:01,361 --> 00:01:05,265
No more tedious seeing your
refrigerator all the time.
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00:01:05,265 --> 00:01:08,569
Come on, we want to show you
our favorite room.
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00:01:10,838 --> 00:01:12,239
(grunting)
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00:01:12,239 --> 00:01:14,374
This is our screening room.
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00:01:14,374 --> 00:01:17,311
It's also where
we shoot our confessionals.
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00:01:17,311 --> 00:01:21,148
It's cool that Dad doesn't have
to work nine to five anymore.
33
00:01:21,148 --> 00:01:23,784
We just have to post
15 videos a day.
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00:01:23,784 --> 00:01:26,486
After homeschooling,
we're free to do fun kid stuff.
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00:01:26,486 --> 00:01:28,856
Zoom calls with
our fan club in Dubai,
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00:01:28,856 --> 00:01:30,891
giving Lamborghinis
to the homeless.
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00:01:30,891 --> 00:01:32,593
Sometimes I
just chill in my room,
38
00:01:32,593 --> 00:01:35,462
recording Cameo messages
until my voice gives out.
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00:01:35,462 --> 00:01:36,830
(sucks on pacifier)
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00:01:36,830 --> 00:01:38,565
MAN: Huh.
41
00:01:41,969 --> 00:01:43,670
(grunting)
42
00:01:43,670 --> 00:01:45,038
M'atchomaroon,
43
00:01:45,038 --> 00:01:46,940
or "Hey, guys" in Dothraki.
44
00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:48,742
Today I'm doing a deep-dive
45
00:01:48,742 --> 00:01:50,277
on the Internet's
current obsession,
46
00:01:50,277 --> 00:01:51,945
The Simpsons Family Channel.
Camera 2.
47
00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:56,083
In case you've been living in a
tauntaun these past four months,
48
00:01:56,083 --> 00:01:58,118
here's the video
that started it all:
49
00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:01,288
"Cute Baby Gets Stage Fright."
Let's take a look.
50
00:02:01,288 --> 00:02:02,756
♪ I have a duckie tail ♪
51
00:02:02,756 --> 00:02:05,392
♪ And a little duckie head ♪
52
00:02:05,392 --> 00:02:05,926
(crowd chuckles)
53
00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:07,327
♪ I quack around the park ♪
54
00:02:07,327 --> 00:02:09,930
♪ And I eat
the old man's bread ♪
55
00:02:09,930 --> 00:02:13,867
Maggie, remember
what we practiced.
56
00:02:13,867 --> 00:02:17,871
Poke Daddy's tummy
and kill the ants.
57
00:02:17,871 --> 00:02:19,873
♪ Honk, stomp, quack ♪
58
00:02:19,873 --> 00:02:21,875
Shake your diaper,
59
00:02:21,875 --> 00:02:23,911
touch the starfish,
60
00:02:23,911 --> 00:02:25,812
open your sandwich,
61
00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:27,681
and Mick Jagger, Jagger, Jagger.
62
00:02:27,681 --> 00:02:29,683
(crowd cheers)
63
00:02:29,683 --> 00:02:31,451
- (Homer shouts)
- (crowd gasps)
64
00:02:31,451 --> 00:02:32,519
(crowd cheers)
65
00:02:32,519 --> 00:02:33,153
No, don't!
66
00:02:33,253 --> 00:02:34,888
- (Homer gasping)
- (crowd gasping)
67
00:02:34,888 --> 00:02:36,790
(crowd cheers)
68
00:02:36,790 --> 00:02:38,525
(crowd oohs)
69
00:02:38,525 --> 00:02:41,028
(crowd laughs, cheers)
70
00:02:41,028 --> 00:02:43,497
Best... origin story... ever.
71
00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:45,832
It deservedly
got 20 million views,
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00:02:45,832 --> 00:02:49,269
and Homer launched a channel
all about the special bond
73
00:02:49,269 --> 00:02:51,738
between himself
and the youngling Maggie.
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00:02:51,738 --> 00:02:52,906
(eating noisily)
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00:02:52,906 --> 00:02:54,508
(Maggie eats noisily)
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00:02:54,508 --> 00:02:57,211
(dog whines)
77
00:02:59,112 --> 00:03:02,649
(vacuum cleaner running)
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00:03:05,052 --> 00:03:06,019
Say, Maggie,
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00:03:06,153 --> 00:03:09,223
do you think our viewers
could enter the code "Aw"
80
00:03:09,223 --> 00:03:14,461
with 15 Ws for a discount
from Toy-Weasel.com?
81
00:03:15,629 --> 00:03:16,730
HOMER:
Mmm.
82
00:03:16,830 --> 00:03:19,499
The Internet fell in love
with the rest of the Simpsons
83
00:03:19,499 --> 00:03:21,168
when they released...
84
00:03:24,905 --> 00:03:29,376
♪ Everybody, yeah ♪
85
00:03:29,376 --> 00:03:34,281
♪ Rock your body, yeah... ♪
86
00:03:43,156 --> 00:03:45,292
(tires screeching)
87
00:03:45,292 --> 00:03:46,927
- (siren wailing)
- ♪ Now throw your hands
up in the air ♪
88
00:03:46,927 --> 00:03:49,463
Whoa, what's going on?
(shouts)
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00:03:49,463 --> 00:03:50,797
(over radio):
♪ 'Cause we got it
going on again ♪
90
00:03:50,797 --> 00:03:52,666
WIGGUM:
Oh. I love this song.
91
00:03:52,666 --> 00:03:55,335
♪ Am I sexual? ♪
92
00:03:55,335 --> 00:03:57,337
♪ Yeah. ♪
93
00:03:57,337 --> 00:03:59,106
MAN:
Hmm.
94
00:03:59,106 --> 00:04:01,108
- Hmm.
- (mouse clicks)
95
00:04:01,108 --> 00:04:07,080
(theme song plays)
96
00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:08,115
(camera shutter clicks)
97
00:04:08,115 --> 00:04:09,483
Greetings, newshounds.
98
00:04:09,483 --> 00:04:13,620
Today, a retrospective on
The Simpsons Family Vlog.
99
00:04:13,620 --> 00:04:17,024
In case you've been living
in a grammar-rodeo boot camp
100
00:04:17,024 --> 00:04:18,058
these past four months,
101
00:04:18,058 --> 00:04:20,194
here's the video
that started it all.
102
00:04:20,194 --> 00:04:23,096
(fast-forwarding)
103
00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:26,200
Soon each family member
had their own channel.
104
00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:28,168
Marge combined her
love of cooking
105
00:04:28,168 --> 00:04:30,137
and deeply personal questions
106
00:04:30,137 --> 00:04:32,639
for a groundbreaking
interview show.
107
00:04:32,639 --> 00:04:34,842
How you holding up, Krusty?
108
00:04:34,842 --> 00:04:36,677
Ready for number four?
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00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:39,112
(groans) I'm not gonna lie,
110
00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:41,481
number three feels like
it's not done with me,
111
00:04:41,481 --> 00:04:44,084
but my agent said
this is what talk shows are now,
112
00:04:44,084 --> 00:04:46,119
so... (burps) bring it on.
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00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:48,522
MARGE:
Next up, The Coagulator.
114
00:04:48,522 --> 00:04:51,225
A tuna melt dipped
in funnel cake batter,
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00:04:51,225 --> 00:04:53,894
then fried in hot mayonnaise.
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00:04:53,894 --> 00:04:56,730
It clocks in at 300,000
117
00:04:56,730 --> 00:04:58,565
on the Lethargo Scale.
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00:04:58,565 --> 00:05:01,268
Oh, I'm really regretting
all those bagels
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00:05:01,268 --> 00:05:03,570
I ate in the greenroom.
120
00:05:05,339 --> 00:05:07,040
(shouts)
121
00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:08,709
The grease
and the powdered sugar
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00:05:08,709 --> 00:05:11,912
are forming a paste
in the back of my throat.
123
00:05:11,912 --> 00:05:14,882
Do you think your comedy
is fueled by rage
124
00:05:14,882 --> 00:05:17,317
towards your father
or towards yourself?
125
00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:20,954
Well, I'd rather talk about
my new holiday movie,
126
00:05:20,954 --> 00:05:23,624
A Very Merry Bris-mas.
127
00:05:23,624 --> 00:05:24,658
(gags)
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00:05:24,658 --> 00:05:27,794
Oh, the batter is in my lungs.
129
00:05:27,794 --> 00:05:31,431
Ow! Why is this a show?!
130
00:05:31,431 --> 00:05:34,501
MARTIN:
And Bart took pranking
to a whole new level
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00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:36,670
with The 'Gurt Squad.
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00:05:37,971 --> 00:05:39,873
(stifling laughter)
133
00:05:39,873 --> 00:05:42,976
Can I sample
the strawberry yogurt?
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00:05:45,913 --> 00:05:48,482
Wait, I'm allergic to strawb--
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00:05:48,482 --> 00:05:50,050
(imitates vomiting)
136
00:05:50,050 --> 00:05:51,685
('Gurt Squad laughing)
137
00:06:05,499 --> 00:06:08,268
The Simpsons were
YouTube sensations,
138
00:06:08,268 --> 00:06:10,571
and corporate America
lavished them
139
00:06:10,571 --> 00:06:12,139
with sponsorships and lucre.
140
00:06:12,139 --> 00:06:14,441
But Lisa used her newfound fame
141
00:06:14,441 --> 00:06:17,544
to draw attention
to issues close to her heart.
142
00:06:17,544 --> 00:06:20,113
Hey, guys.
I'm here at Needle Beach,
143
00:06:20,113 --> 00:06:22,482
super stoked
to start this clean-up
144
00:06:22,482 --> 00:06:24,084
because, as you can see,
145
00:06:24,084 --> 00:06:26,186
this beach
is pretty messed up.
146
00:06:26,186 --> 00:06:27,988
(gasps) What's that?
147
00:06:27,988 --> 00:06:30,791
Oh! Oh, you poor thing.
148
00:06:30,791 --> 00:06:33,327
Luckily,
I always carry wire cutters.
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00:06:34,828 --> 00:06:37,364
♪
150
00:06:38,765 --> 00:06:39,466
(mouse clicks)
151
00:06:42,002 --> 00:06:42,736
(mouse clicks)
152
00:06:42,903 --> 00:06:44,738
(distorted voice):
Attention, Internet.
153
00:06:44,738 --> 00:06:47,007
It is I, Truth Wizard.
154
00:06:47,007 --> 00:06:49,409
The Simpsons are not
who you think they are,
155
00:06:49,409 --> 00:06:52,179
and I can't let
these lies continue
156
00:06:52,179 --> 00:06:54,748
for even one more sec...
157
00:07:01,221 --> 00:07:03,957
...and I can't let
these lies continue
158
00:07:03,957 --> 00:07:06,393
for even one more sec...
159
00:07:06,393 --> 00:07:08,962
LUANN:
Milhouse, why are you
sitting in the dark?
160
00:07:08,962 --> 00:07:10,564
You'll ruin your eyes.
161
00:07:10,564 --> 00:07:11,798
Mom.
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00:07:11,798 --> 00:07:12,900
The doctor said your nose
163
00:07:12,900 --> 00:07:14,301
can't support thicker glasses.
164
00:07:14,301 --> 00:07:17,738
I'm recording a takedown.
Get out.
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00:07:17,738 --> 00:07:18,639
(door closes)
166
00:07:18,639 --> 00:07:21,408
Okay, fine, it's me, Milhouse.
167
00:07:21,408 --> 00:07:25,679
I was the one filming
every Simpson family video.
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00:07:25,679 --> 00:07:26,880
Take your shoes off first.
169
00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:30,851
All 50 million of you. (laughs)
170
00:07:30,851 --> 00:07:32,920
Yo, camera-monkey, shoes off.
171
00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:36,323
MILHOUSE: I saw firsthand how
the pressure to create content
172
00:07:36,323 --> 00:07:38,659
- turned them into monsters.
- (Homer growls)
173
00:07:38,659 --> 00:07:41,895
- HOMER: Where the hell
is the refrigerator?!
- (groans) Coming.
174
00:07:41,895 --> 00:07:43,530
(grunting)
175
00:07:43,530 --> 00:07:45,332
You have to tap it.
176
00:07:45,332 --> 00:07:48,035
(grunts)
Oh, who would want this?
177
00:07:48,035 --> 00:07:49,870
- I'm getting a hammer.
- No.
178
00:07:49,870 --> 00:07:52,206
You never let me get the hammer!
179
00:07:53,640 --> 00:07:56,210
Ew, your hand is so sweaty.
180
00:07:56,210 --> 00:07:59,847
Would you tell my scene partner
to be professional?
181
00:07:59,847 --> 00:08:02,449
MILHOUSE:
Uh, Bart? Lisa has a note...
182
00:08:02,449 --> 00:08:03,450
Shut up, Milhouse.
183
00:08:03,450 --> 00:08:04,351
MILHOUSE:
Ow.
184
00:08:04,351 --> 00:08:05,519
And those cool
185
00:08:05,519 --> 00:08:06,553
'Gurt Squad friends
186
00:08:06,553 --> 00:08:09,056
that hype up
Bart's prank videos?
187
00:08:09,056 --> 00:08:11,491
Paid Spucklers.
188
00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:13,327
Hey, guys,
you don't have to go home
189
00:08:13,327 --> 00:08:15,295
just 'cause
we're done filming pranks.
190
00:08:15,295 --> 00:08:19,066
Yeah, we was meaning
to ask you about that.
191
00:08:19,066 --> 00:08:22,169
How is what you do a prank?
192
00:08:22,169 --> 00:08:25,138
This just seems like
a mean-spirited waste of yogurt.
193
00:08:25,138 --> 00:08:27,274
Okay, we'll use pudding.
Great note.
194
00:08:27,274 --> 00:08:29,276
Hey, you guys want
to jump on my trampoline?
195
00:08:29,276 --> 00:08:31,378
I'll take
the safety barrier down.
196
00:08:31,378 --> 00:08:35,415
We prefer to keep our
relationship professional.
197
00:08:35,415 --> 00:08:37,084
I'll... pay you.
198
00:08:37,084 --> 00:08:38,552
(groans) Fine.
199
00:08:38,552 --> 00:08:41,255
Time and a half.
And a basket of eggs.
200
00:08:41,255 --> 00:08:42,456
Our hen is feeling poorly.
201
00:08:42,556 --> 00:08:45,759
MILHOUSE:
Even my off-again, off-again
girlfriend Lisa
202
00:08:45,759 --> 00:08:49,897
fell prey to the siren's call
of Internet fame.
203
00:08:49,897 --> 00:08:53,100
What the hell is this?
This beach is spotless.
204
00:08:53,100 --> 00:08:56,403
MILHOUSE:
Sorry, Lisa. We're on it.
205
00:08:56,403 --> 00:08:57,471
(grunts)
206
00:08:57,471 --> 00:09:00,774
Now where's this thing
I'm supposed to save?
207
00:09:00,774 --> 00:09:02,743
MILHOUSE:
Uh, Gil, how's it coming?
208
00:09:02,743 --> 00:09:04,311
I-I'm trying. Ow!
209
00:09:04,311 --> 00:09:07,347
This little fella's really
good at freeing himself.
210
00:09:07,347 --> 00:09:10,384
CREW PERSON:
That's a rented seal. Catch him.
211
00:09:10,384 --> 00:09:11,919
We're gonna lose our deposit.
212
00:09:11,919 --> 00:09:13,954
(both grunting)
213
00:09:13,954 --> 00:09:16,123
But let's take a look
at the relationship
214
00:09:16,123 --> 00:09:18,825
that started
this whole crazy ride:
215
00:09:18,825 --> 00:09:20,861
Homer and Maggie.
216
00:09:20,861 --> 00:09:22,996
We are so excited
to work with Maggie
217
00:09:22,996 --> 00:09:24,464
on this viral campaign for
218
00:09:24,464 --> 00:09:27,067
Nom-Noms 6:
European Nom-cation.
219
00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:29,236
We got Maggie's room all set up
220
00:09:29,236 --> 00:09:32,039
for the ultimate immersive
Nom-Nom experience.
221
00:09:32,039 --> 00:09:35,008
Uh, one little hiccup.
222
00:09:35,008 --> 00:09:37,611
Maggie's terrified of Nom-Noms,
223
00:09:37,611 --> 00:09:39,079
especially the girl one.
224
00:09:39,079 --> 00:09:41,915
I'm not sure why.
Uh, Bart will do it.
225
00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:43,851
The yogurt kid? No way. No.
226
00:09:43,851 --> 00:09:45,118
Either the Internet baby
goes in there,
227
00:09:45,118 --> 00:09:47,654
or you forfeit
all nom-pensation.
228
00:09:47,654 --> 00:09:51,091
So that's, uh, "nom"-negotiable?
229
00:09:51,091 --> 00:09:53,527
- (chuckles)
- That's not a real word.
230
00:09:53,527 --> 00:09:56,230
Maggie, there's
a cute baby bunny in there,
231
00:09:56,230 --> 00:10:01,268
so put this GoPro
on your head...
232
00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:04,605
Nom-nom-nom-nom-nom-nom-nom-nom.
233
00:10:04,605 --> 00:10:05,939
(Maggie shrieks, cries)
234
00:10:05,939 --> 00:10:09,977
NOM-NOMS:
Nom-nom-nom-nom-nom-nom-
nom-nom-nom-nom-nom-nom...
235
00:10:09,977 --> 00:10:12,112
(Maggie screaming)
236
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:15,449
(Maggie crying)
237
00:10:15,883 --> 00:10:17,484
Oh...
238
00:10:22,189 --> 00:10:24,091
Maggie, I'm sorry.
239
00:10:24,091 --> 00:10:25,526
(Maggie fussing)
240
00:10:25,526 --> 00:10:29,196
Poor Maggie. Although
I like the girl Nom-Nom.
241
00:10:29,196 --> 00:10:30,564
I like her a lot.
242
00:10:30,564 --> 00:10:33,534
I like the way her glasses
have eyelashes and...
243
00:10:33,534 --> 00:10:35,869
LUANN:
Milhouse,
come do your ear drops.
244
00:10:35,869 --> 00:10:37,504
Mom!
245
00:10:39,873 --> 00:10:40,741
(mouse clicks)
246
00:10:40,741 --> 00:10:41,742
Hey, guys.
247
00:10:41,742 --> 00:10:44,044
Welcome to episode 751 of
248
00:10:44,044 --> 00:10:46,013
The Lenny and Carl Situation.
249
00:10:46,013 --> 00:10:48,615
Back with us
is our frequent guest Moe.
250
00:10:48,615 --> 00:10:50,217
You gonna behave today, Moe?
251
00:10:50,217 --> 00:10:53,020
(chuckling):
Hey, don't cancel me, huh?
252
00:10:53,020 --> 00:10:55,189
Today we're talking about
the Simpson family,
253
00:10:55,189 --> 00:10:59,560
specifically "Super Dad"
himself, Homer Simpson.
254
00:10:59,560 --> 00:11:00,494
Guy's a phony.
255
00:11:00,594 --> 00:11:03,397
Full disclosure:
You go back five, six months,
256
00:11:03,397 --> 00:11:05,232
we were best friends
with the guy
257
00:11:05,232 --> 00:11:07,868
before he got famous
for those baby videos.
258
00:11:07,868 --> 00:11:10,938
Yeah, so many nights getting
blackout drunk with Homer.
259
00:11:10,938 --> 00:11:13,774
I don't remember him
mentioning that baby once.
260
00:11:13,774 --> 00:11:17,010
And I heard Maggie won't make
any more videos with him.
261
00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:21,181
What people been seeing
is all high-tech trickery.
262
00:11:21,181 --> 00:11:23,617
Intern Barney, play the clip.
263
00:11:27,588 --> 00:11:30,023
HOMER: Mmm.
264
00:11:30,023 --> 00:11:32,526
Oh, even fake Maggies
hate me.
265
00:11:32,526 --> 00:11:34,761
(laughing)
266
00:11:34,761 --> 00:11:35,629
You know, I'm thinking about
267
00:11:35,896 --> 00:11:38,198
going on the all-peanut diet.
You heard about this?
268
00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:39,700
Supposed to be great
for the adrenals.
269
00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:42,002
You know, the Aztecs,
that's all they ate was peanuts.
270
00:11:42,002 --> 00:11:44,004
Not like the crap we got today.
271
00:11:44,004 --> 00:11:46,773
Them ancient nuts,
they was full of that, uh, uh,
272
00:11:46,773 --> 00:11:48,242
niacinnamonites. Yeah.
273
00:11:48,242 --> 00:11:49,476
'Cause of the sand they had.
274
00:11:49,476 --> 00:11:51,678
And they lived to be a hundred,
200 years old.
275
00:11:51,678 --> 00:11:54,381
- (man groans)
- MOE: Same thing with
the Mayans and cashews...
276
00:11:54,381 --> 00:11:55,649
MAN:
Uh-uh.
277
00:11:58,819 --> 00:11:59,620
(mouse clicks)
278
00:11:59,620 --> 00:12:00,721
Hey, guys.
279
00:12:00,721 --> 00:12:03,390
We know there have been
a lot of rumors going around.
280
00:12:03,390 --> 00:12:05,526
So we wanted
to formally announce
281
00:12:05,526 --> 00:12:07,895
that we'll be making
a formal announcement
282
00:12:07,895 --> 00:12:10,097
tomorrow night on our livestream
283
00:12:10,097 --> 00:12:13,300
which will address
all the recent controversies.
284
00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:17,771
And we'll Cluck-Stop at nothing
to earn your trust back.
285
00:12:17,771 --> 00:12:18,872
(grunts)
286
00:12:18,872 --> 00:12:20,741
FRINK:
That was nine days ago.
287
00:12:20,741 --> 00:12:24,611
Nobody has seen or heard
from the Simpsons family since.
288
00:12:24,611 --> 00:12:27,447
Over the next two hours,
I will break down my theories
289
00:12:27,447 --> 00:12:30,984
on what might have caused
their dramatic disappearance
290
00:12:30,984 --> 00:12:34,588
on this special edition of...
291
00:12:34,588 --> 00:12:37,724
That's your cue.
This special edition of...
292
00:12:37,724 --> 00:12:38,959
Frinkileaks.
293
00:12:38,959 --> 00:12:41,662
Now play
the suspenseful music.
294
00:12:42,863 --> 00:12:45,732
No, that's a latte macchiato.
295
00:12:45,732 --> 00:12:47,968
(suspenseful music playing)
296
00:12:47,968 --> 00:12:51,505
Well, you might as well
finish my coffee now.
297
00:12:51,505 --> 00:12:53,574
(grunting)
298
00:13:03,250 --> 00:13:07,788
Which brings us once again
to Snowball I,
299
00:13:07,788 --> 00:13:09,923
which... (groans)
300
00:13:09,923 --> 00:13:12,593
Marker fumes. Oh, my.
301
00:13:12,593 --> 00:13:15,162
Hoyvik! Blarvlagin! Ivy.
302
00:13:15,162 --> 00:13:16,563
(clears throat)
I apologize.
303
00:13:16,563 --> 00:13:20,200
Um... in summary, I have
concluded that the Simpsons
304
00:13:20,200 --> 00:13:23,504
are being held hostage
by a major tech company.
305
00:13:23,504 --> 00:13:26,273
Now, I cannot
say which one, but, um,
306
00:13:26,273 --> 00:13:29,576
follow the Google Doodles.
307
00:13:31,278 --> 00:13:35,249
If, uh, you pause
right where the video glitches,
308
00:13:35,249 --> 00:13:37,384
you can see Homer
doesn't look human.
309
00:13:37,384 --> 00:13:41,021
More like an alien wearing
an ill-fitting human suit.
310
00:13:41,021 --> 00:13:42,256
Let me tell you something,
311
00:13:42,256 --> 00:13:45,058
Homer Simpsons has done more
for this country
312
00:13:45,058 --> 00:13:49,129
than Dr. Fauci
and Dr. Pimple Popper combined.
313
00:13:49,129 --> 00:13:51,832
It's not his fault
he has a trash son
314
00:13:51,832 --> 00:13:54,168
with a face
like a lunch bag, okay?
315
00:13:54,168 --> 00:13:57,971
Leave Homer Simpsons alone!
Leave him alone!
316
00:13:57,971 --> 00:14:00,340
(enunciating):
Welcome back to Patty...
317
00:14:00,340 --> 00:14:02,075
(enunciating):
And Selma's...
318
00:14:02,075 --> 00:14:04,378
BOTH:
Tingle Palace.
319
00:14:04,378 --> 00:14:07,147
We were going to do part four
320
00:14:07,147 --> 00:14:10,851
of our scalp-delousing
role-play.
321
00:14:10,851 --> 00:14:12,786
(tines riffling)
322
00:14:12,786 --> 00:14:14,788
But, in light of recent events,
323
00:14:14,788 --> 00:14:18,025
we're going to tell you what
we think happened to our
324
00:14:18,025 --> 00:14:22,229
sister Marge Simpson.
325
00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:25,432
(scales rubbing)
326
00:14:25,432 --> 00:14:28,969
It's pretty obvious
that Homer snapped,
327
00:14:28,969 --> 00:14:30,871
ate the whole family.
328
00:14:30,871 --> 00:14:32,472
and is hiding on a houseboat,
329
00:14:32,472 --> 00:14:35,909
in a cloud of belches
that used to be his wife
330
00:14:35,909 --> 00:14:37,544
and kids.
331
00:14:37,544 --> 00:14:39,947
(grunts)
332
00:14:39,947 --> 00:14:41,381
(scraping)
333
00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:43,584
- (man shudders)
- (mouse clicks)
334
00:14:43,584 --> 00:14:46,119
Hmm... hmm.
335
00:14:46,119 --> 00:14:47,487
What's up, guys?
Today we had
336
00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:50,357
a whole cemetery parkour
segment ready to go,
337
00:14:50,357 --> 00:14:53,193
but instead we've got
a big announcement.
338
00:14:53,193 --> 00:14:55,262
The location
of the Simpsons' mansion
339
00:14:55,262 --> 00:14:57,030
has always been super secret,
340
00:14:57,030 --> 00:14:58,465
but we figured out where it is.
341
00:14:58,465 --> 00:15:01,368
We found clues
in all their old videos.
342
00:15:01,368 --> 00:15:03,437
We're talking
regional birdsongs,
343
00:15:03,437 --> 00:15:06,006
town-specific
ice cream truck jingle.
344
00:15:06,006 --> 00:15:08,075
But the clincher:
my mom's dating a guy
345
00:15:08,075 --> 00:15:09,843
who got fired
from the post office,
346
00:15:09,843 --> 00:15:11,712
and he gave us their address.
347
00:15:11,712 --> 00:15:14,448
We're heading there tonight
to get some answers.
348
00:15:14,448 --> 00:15:16,149
But first, parkour.
349
00:15:16,149 --> 00:15:17,784
Parkour. (grunts)
350
00:15:17,784 --> 00:15:18,852
Beloved husband!
351
00:15:18,852 --> 00:15:20,621
Angel-baby!
352
00:15:20,621 --> 00:15:22,890
Jewish guy! Parkour!
353
00:15:22,890 --> 00:15:24,258
- (mouse clicks)
- MAN: Eh...
354
00:15:24,258 --> 00:15:25,158
- Huh.
- (mouse clicks)
355
00:15:25,158 --> 00:15:27,261
Hey, guys, I'm Shauna.
356
00:15:27,261 --> 00:15:29,229
With a freaking exclusive.
357
00:15:29,229 --> 00:15:31,398
I found the Simpsons mansion.
358
00:15:31,398 --> 00:15:34,401
What the hell, Jimbo?
Did you tell her the address?
359
00:15:34,401 --> 00:15:36,603
JIMBO:
Duh. She's my girlfriend. Hey...
360
00:15:38,438 --> 00:15:40,407
(grunting)
361
00:15:40,407 --> 00:15:42,943
MARTIN:
Martin Prince here, now embedded
362
00:15:42,943 --> 00:15:44,678
at the Simpsons family compound.
363
00:15:44,678 --> 00:15:48,048
SHAUNA:
We're about to get
scooped, dumb-wads.
364
00:15:48,048 --> 00:15:52,219
Hey, guys, Simpsons...
(speaking gibberish)
365
00:15:52,219 --> 00:15:53,220
Like and subscribe.
366
00:15:53,220 --> 00:15:54,655
- PATTY: Hey, guys.
- COMIC BOOK GUY: Hey, guys.
367
00:15:54,655 --> 00:15:56,723
- SHERRI AND TERRI: Hey, guys.
- MOE: Hey, guys.
368
00:15:56,723 --> 00:15:58,325
(gasps) It's a vlog swarm.
369
00:15:58,325 --> 00:16:01,028
No, no, no. This is our content.
370
00:16:01,028 --> 00:16:02,329
JIMBO:
Okay, okay.
371
00:16:02,329 --> 00:16:03,864
(Crazy Cat Lady
speaking gibberish)
372
00:16:03,864 --> 00:16:06,366
JIMBO:
But turn on that light.
373
00:16:06,366 --> 00:16:08,402
NELSON:
This way, come on.
374
00:16:08,402 --> 00:16:10,170
(all panting)
375
00:16:10,170 --> 00:16:11,672
Ha! Look at this.
376
00:16:11,672 --> 00:16:14,508
They obviously left in a hurry
without their phones.
377
00:16:14,508 --> 00:16:17,744
Shut up.
I can't hear myself Shauna.
378
00:16:18,812 --> 00:16:20,981
- Move out, people, let's go,
let's go, let's go.
- Come on, guys, let's go.
379
00:16:20,981 --> 00:16:22,983
(gasps)
Huh?
380
00:16:22,983 --> 00:16:25,886
(all shouting)
381
00:16:25,886 --> 00:16:26,854
- Hmm?
- What is this?
382
00:16:26,854 --> 00:16:28,755
(all grunt curiously)
383
00:16:28,755 --> 00:16:30,190
- (Simpsons gasp)
- I found 'em!
384
00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:31,625
Somebody get a pic!
385
00:16:31,625 --> 00:16:32,259
Bart, the door!
386
00:16:32,359 --> 00:16:34,561
- MARGE: Grab it!
- LISA: Get it!
387
00:16:36,997 --> 00:16:38,832
Welcome, Simpson family.
388
00:16:38,832 --> 00:16:42,436
So, nine days
in a panic room. Why?
389
00:16:42,436 --> 00:16:44,404
Well, Opal,
our house had been built
390
00:16:44,404 --> 00:16:47,241
by a company we partnered with
that, at that point,
391
00:16:47,241 --> 00:16:50,410
had only built NFTs of houses.
(chuckles)
392
00:16:50,410 --> 00:16:53,213
They installed
the panic room door backwards.
393
00:16:53,213 --> 00:16:55,582
You could get in,
but you can't get out.
394
00:16:55,582 --> 00:16:58,385
But how did you all
end up trapped there?
395
00:16:58,385 --> 00:17:01,889
Well, we'd been getting ready
for our redemption livestream,
396
00:17:01,889 --> 00:17:03,924
and we were all a little tense.
397
00:17:03,924 --> 00:17:06,126
So I went to the panic room,
where we stored
398
00:17:06,126 --> 00:17:07,794
all of our sponsored crap,
399
00:17:07,794 --> 00:17:09,963
to get some
children's CBD gummies.
400
00:17:09,963 --> 00:17:12,232
But I was already in there
pounding 'em.
401
00:17:14,434 --> 00:17:17,738
MARGE: Then I ran in
and yelled, "Stop fighting.
402
00:17:17,738 --> 00:17:19,306
"You're going to sweat through
403
00:17:19,306 --> 00:17:21,508
your signature line
of slimming activewear."
404
00:17:21,508 --> 00:17:22,776
BART:
But when we tried to leave,
405
00:17:22,776 --> 00:17:23,911
it was locked.
406
00:17:23,911 --> 00:17:25,812
LISA:
I said, "Nobody panic.
407
00:17:25,812 --> 00:17:27,781
There's got to be
a panic button."
408
00:17:27,781 --> 00:17:29,216
HOMER:
Then I walked in, saying,
409
00:17:29,216 --> 00:17:31,285
"Marge, I can't find
the fridge again."
410
00:17:31,285 --> 00:17:33,220
LISA:
We tried to grab the door.
411
00:17:33,220 --> 00:17:34,454
But it was too late.
412
00:17:34,454 --> 00:17:37,457
We were trapped,
and it was all Homer's fault.
413
00:17:37,457 --> 00:17:40,127
What? You said
it was nobody's fault.
414
00:17:40,127 --> 00:17:41,995
That's what
I'm supposed to feel,
415
00:17:41,995 --> 00:17:43,664
but I'm not there yet.
416
00:17:43,664 --> 00:17:46,400
LISA:
We survived on products
we'd been shilling
417
00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:49,069
but had never
actually eaten before.
418
00:17:49,069 --> 00:17:51,104
Luckily, there was
also a huge supply
419
00:17:51,104 --> 00:17:53,240
of single-use hat-toilets.
420
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:55,976
Uh, I'm pretty sure
those were just hats.
421
00:17:55,976 --> 00:17:58,045
We didn't have any way
to post content,
422
00:17:58,045 --> 00:18:01,448
so we went through
pretty severe withdrawal.
423
00:18:06,987 --> 00:18:09,223
MARGE:
Then, sometime around day four,
424
00:18:09,223 --> 00:18:11,091
I said, "Where's Maggie?
425
00:18:11,091 --> 00:18:13,193
She was just here a second ago."
426
00:18:14,528 --> 00:18:16,530
I moved the table from the wall
and said,
427
00:18:16,530 --> 00:18:20,100
(gasps) "Oh, God. She must've
crawled in the vent."
428
00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:22,569
HOMER:
I said, "Maggie, come back."
429
00:18:22,569 --> 00:18:26,240
That I'd never force her
to do content ever again,
430
00:18:26,240 --> 00:18:29,009
that I wouldn't be
♪Daddy anymore,
431
00:18:29,009 --> 00:18:31,111
I'd just be Daddy.
432
00:18:31,111 --> 00:18:32,513
And then...
433
00:18:32,513 --> 00:18:34,982
LISA:
She'd been in the cabinet
the whole time.
434
00:18:34,982 --> 00:18:36,149
We were so relieved.
435
00:18:36,283 --> 00:18:39,386
MARGE:
Then we realized how high up
she was, and then...
436
00:18:39,386 --> 00:18:41,588
BART:
But Homer made an awesome catch.
437
00:18:41,588 --> 00:18:42,723
And Maggie barfed on him.
438
00:18:42,723 --> 00:18:44,525
(chuckles)
Classic.
439
00:18:45,492 --> 00:18:48,829
MARGE:
After that,
something strange happened.
440
00:18:48,829 --> 00:18:51,365
We started talking
to each other.
441
00:18:51,365 --> 00:18:54,168
BART:
Like texting with our mouths.
442
00:18:54,168 --> 00:18:55,669
LISA:
I'd almost forgotten
443
00:18:55,669 --> 00:18:58,338
I could L-O-L I-R-L.
444
00:18:58,338 --> 00:19:01,308
MARGE:
It felt like we were
coming out of a trance.
445
00:19:01,308 --> 00:19:03,744
LISA:
The only subscribers we needed
446
00:19:03,744 --> 00:19:05,979
were in that room.
447
00:19:05,979 --> 00:19:07,881
Wow. Just, wow.
448
00:19:07,881 --> 00:19:11,251
We're shutting down
the YouTube channel
449
00:19:11,251 --> 00:19:14,555
because "The Simpson Family"
isn't who we are.
450
00:19:14,555 --> 00:19:17,291
We are the Simpsons.
451
00:19:17,291 --> 00:19:19,927
We are completely offline now.
452
00:19:19,927 --> 00:19:21,728
I don't even check
email anymore,
453
00:19:21,728 --> 00:19:24,498
but that's mainly 'cause we
moved back to Evergreen Terrace,
454
00:19:24,498 --> 00:19:28,468
and our neighborino changed
his Wi-Fi passwordily-durdily.
455
00:19:28,468 --> 00:19:30,003
Well, there you have it.
456
00:19:30,003 --> 00:19:32,339
A confusing, nonsense-word end
457
00:19:32,339 --> 00:19:34,908
to the meteoric rise and fall
458
00:19:34,908 --> 00:19:36,844
and disappearance
and reappearance
459
00:19:36,844 --> 00:19:38,846
and return to status quo
460
00:19:38,846 --> 00:19:40,948
for the family
the Internet could not
461
00:19:40,948 --> 00:19:43,250
get enough of
for almost half a year.
462
00:19:43,250 --> 00:19:45,052
Can we go look at your beehives?
463
00:19:45,052 --> 00:19:47,354
Nah, we're all done here.
464
00:19:47,354 --> 00:19:50,624
Well, that's four hours
of my life I'll never get back.
465
00:19:50,624 --> 00:19:54,595
WOMAN:
George R. R. Martin, you better
be working on that new book.
466
00:19:54,595 --> 00:19:56,029
I am.
467
00:19:56,029 --> 00:19:58,465
You said you would finish
it years ago.
468
00:19:58,465 --> 00:19:59,566
I'm gonna.
469
00:19:59,566 --> 00:20:02,302
They already made two TV shows
about it.
470
00:20:02,302 --> 00:20:05,506
I know that.
I went to the parties.
471
00:20:05,506 --> 00:20:08,542
No more parties until
you finish that book.
472
00:20:08,542 --> 00:20:10,043
I'm writing it right now.
473
00:20:10,043 --> 00:20:12,379
I'm... doing research.
474
00:20:12,379 --> 00:20:14,181
(typing)
475
00:20:15,716 --> 00:20:16,750
Oh.
476
00:20:17,818 --> 00:20:20,220
You did not just stick
your hands in the mint bowl.
477
00:20:20,220 --> 00:20:22,155
Girl, use the spoon,
or I'm gonna have to
478
00:20:22,155 --> 00:20:24,124
kick your
Rooty Tooty Fresh 'N Booty.
479
00:20:24,124 --> 00:20:25,826
Bitch, that is
an IHOP reference.
480
00:20:25,826 --> 00:20:27,461
- This is a Waffle House, mama.
- The Waffle House.
481
00:20:27,461 --> 00:20:30,430
♪ Waffle to the House, House ♪
482
00:20:30,430 --> 00:20:32,266
♪ Waf to the kach
to the House, how ♪
483
00:20:32,266 --> 00:20:34,668
- ♪ From the legendary
House of Waffle. ♪
- (chuckling)
484
00:20:34,668 --> 00:20:36,970
Captioning sponsored by
20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION
485
00:20:36,970 --> 00:20:39,473
and FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY
486
00:20:39,473 --> 00:20:42,342
and TOYOTA.
487
00:20:46,246 --> 00:20:50,217
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
488
00:21:28,555 --> 00:21:29,556
Shh!
33613
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