Original subtitles

[WHISTLE BLOWING]

[ CALLIOPEPLAYING]

[CAR HORN HONKING]

[AUDIENCE CHEERING]

PEE-WEE: ♪ The sweetest thing that's ever

♪ Blown in with the breeze

♪ And if you see her

WOMAN: I love you!

♪ Tell her that I'm in love with her

♪ She's the girl on the flying trapeze

♪ Hey

♪ The girl on the flying trapeze

♪ Whoa

♪ When I close my eyes

♪ I see her there

♪ Swinging through my dreams

♪ And I want so bad to tell her

♪ Yeah

♪ How I really feel

♪ She's the girl

♪ On the flying trapeze

It's Abraham Lincoln!

Can I have your autograph, Mr. Lincoln?[CAMERAS FLASHING]

Oh, thank you so much. I'm such a big fan of yours, Abraham.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

WOMAN: [GASPS] It's Pee-wee!

[WOMEN SCREAMING]

[WHOOSHES]

[CROWING]

[PIG GRUNTING]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER ON RADIO]

WOMAN ON RADIO: We'll be right back after this.

WOMAN 1: Tell me, would you buy a tractor from a pig?

WOMAN 2: No way!

WOMAN 1: Would you buy a plow from a cow?

MAN: No, ma'am.

WOMAN 1: Well, then...

[WATER RUNNING]

[SCREAMING]

WOMAN ON RADIO: We're back with Bob and Betty.

Vance.

[GRUNTS]

Vance, wake up. You'll be late for school.

[CONTINUES GRUNTING]

Vance.

[SHOUTING] Vance!

[DOG BARKING]

Come on.

Come on.

[SHEEP BLEATING]

[GRUNTING]

[GRUNTING]

♪ Pee-wee Herman had a farm

♪ Ee-yi-ee-yi-oh

♪ With a...[GRUNTING]

♪ And a...[GRUNTING]

♪ Here a... There a...[GRUNTING]

♪ Everywhere a...[GRUNTING]

♪ Pee-wee Herman had a farm

♪ Ee-yi-ee-yi-oh

[LAUGHS]

Come on, everybody. Wake up.

Rise and shine!

[MOOING]

[BLEATING]

[GRUNTING]

Ooh! [CHUCKLES]

Come, Sparky, get out of bed.

Sparky, come on.[GRUNTING]

Sparky, I feel the same way, but I got out of bed.

[BLEATING]Good morning, Clyde. Give me five.

Make your beds.

[BLEATING]

[SNORTING]

[VANCE GRUNTING]

[CHIRPING]

Haven't you been fed yet? [CHUCKLES]

[GRUNTING]

[RETCHING]

Mmm! Chocolaty.

[MOOING]

[HENS CLUCKING]

Mmm! Yummy.

[SIZZLING]

[MOOING]

[METAL CLINKING]PEE-WEE: Come and get it!

Breakfast!

Come and get it!

Come and get it!

[DOG BARKING][HEN SQUAWKING]

[VOCALIZING]

Whoa! [CHUCKLES]

Good manners.

[GRUNTING][HUMMING]

Here you are, Vance. [CHUCKLES]

There you go.

Here you are.

Horace.

[BURPS]

Hey, use your own plate.

[BLEATING]

Vance, how nice of you to share.

Mmm!

All right, everyone may be excused.

[SHEEP BLEATING]

[GIGGLES]

[BEEPING]

Good morning, everybody.

Mmm!

My, don't we look lush this morning!

[MONITOR BEEPING]

Look, Vance, the calla lilies are in bloom again.

[GRUNTING]

Let's see how this formula works.

Okay, Pee-wee.

Splendid. I'm very satisfied with these results, Pee-wee.

Me too, Vance. If we keep going at this rate,

people will only have to buy one tomato a year.

We do not want to end up with a low potassium level.

Duh, Vance, you'd think I never went to agricultural junior college.

Sorry. Boy, I'm hungry. What are we doing for lunch?

Hmm. Let me check my datebook.

I'm starving.

Ah!

Lunch with Winnie.

[CHUCKLES]

[CAR APPROACHING]

[HORN HONKING]

Hello! [CHUCKLES][TIRES SCREECHING]

MAN: Out of the way!

Hey, Joe. What do you know?

Ow! Ow! Ow!

Hey, what's the matter, Pee-wee?

That Joe sure can talk your ear off. Huh?

VANCE: I love that story.

Hey, Pee-wee, let's race.

On your mark, get set!Hey!

Go!

Excuse me.

Oh!

[GRUNTING]

VANCE: I win. I win.

I let you win. Besides, you cheated.

You have more legs than me.

Hello, Pee-wee.Hello, Winnie.

Am I late?Of course you're late, Pee-wee.

But I forgive you.

[BOTH GIGGLING]

Oh, Winnie.

[WINNIE GRUNTS]

WINNIE: Oh, the children! The children!

[SIGHS]

Why don't you take a picture. It'll last longer.

Ahhh! Paparazzi!

Oh, Pee-wee, really.

[CAMERAS CLICKING]

Now, children.

Mr. Herman and I would like to have a quiet lunch.

Why don't you play with Vance.

ALL: Yes, Miss Johnson.

[ALL LAUGHING]

[CHUCKLES]

Alone at last.

[BOTH GIGGLE]

I made your favorite.

Mmm. Fried chicken.

No. [CHUCKLES]

Hamburgers?

No, your favorite, Pee-wee.

Cheese sandwich!

No.

I know. Turkey a laking.

No.

Vegetarian plate?No.

Shepherd's pie?No.

Olive loaf.No!

I can't think of anything else. I give up.

It's egg salad, darling.

Egg salad. My favorite!

[GIGGLES]

Mmm!

Egg salady.

[GIGGLING]

Mmm!

That was delicious, Winnie.

Oh, thank you, Pee-wee. Would you care for another?

Oh, no, now. Thanks, I'm full.

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

[GIGGLES]

[TINKLING]

Boy, you sure do have beautiful hair, Winnie.

Oh. Thank you, Pee-wee.

May I?

Mmm-hmm.

Yes, you may, Pee-wee. [GIGGLES]

[MOANS]

Oh, that feels good.

[GIGGLES]

Ow!

Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ow, ow! Ow! Ow!

Ow! Ow! Ow!

[PANTING]

[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]

Boy, the clouds sure do look beautiful, don't they, Winnie?Mmm-hmm.

[SIGHS]

Look, that cloud right there looks like an Indian riding a buffalo.

Which one?That one right there.

That one right there looks like a train going into a tunnel.

You can see that, can't you?

No, not really.

Now, how about some dessert?

[GRUNTING]Ooh! [GIGGLING]

Goodness, where does the time go? [LAUGHS]

Children! Children!

[CLEARS THROAT]

Come on, get her! Get her!

Get her! Get her! Get her! Get her!

Children!

Children!Ow!

Vance was just teaching us to mud wrestle.

Well, thank you, Vance.

Now I won't have to cover that topic this afternoon.

[VANCE GRUNTS]Come on, let's get you cleaned up.

Bye, Winnie.

Will I see you for lunch tomorrow, Pee-wee?

Let me consult my datebook.

[GIGGLES]

Yes, you will.

[LAUGHS]

Till then.

[LAUGHS]

PEE-WEE: Come on, Vance.Now, give me that dirty hand.

VANCE: So how was lunch?

Great. Come on, let's get something to eat.

VANCE: Yeah.On your mark, get set, go!

[VANCE GRUNTING]

VANCE: Thank you.

Hey! If I told you once, I told you 100 times.

I don't want you running around my store, Pee-wee Herman.

Sorry, Mr. Ryan. I'm just so hungry,

and I guess I couldn't wait to sample

one of those delicious cheese sandwiches of yours.

Would you mind making me one?

We were here first, weren't we, Mr. Ryan?

I'm afraid you'll just have to wait.

And I'm sure Mr. Ryan isn't going to serve you at all

as long as you've got that pig in here. Isn't that right, Mr. Ryan?

That's right, Nadine. No pigs allowed.

[SQUEALS]

Good afternoon, Mrs. Dill.

Good afternoon, Mrs. Haynes.

I'm so awfully hungry.

I'm sure you two beautiful ladies wouldn't mind

letting me go ahead of you.

Well, we certainly would mind.[GASPS] I should say so.

First come, first served.

Isn't that the way you've always heard it, Mr. Ryan?

Sure is. First come, first served.

All right! All right!

I'll wait.

MR. RYAN: I hope you're planning to buy that magazine, Pee-wee.

This ain't no library.

Now, let me see.

Have you got any of that lovely Korean lace?

Just come in.

Oh, this is pretty.

Mmm. Mmm.

This would make a nice doily, don't you think, Mae?

Mmm.Mmm.

Oh, what about this for the china cabinet?

Mmm. Maybe.

All I wanted was a measly sandwich!

I very nicely explained that I was starving.

I'm starving! Please!

I'm sorry, ladies. I guess you'll just have to wait.

You remember, no one is as important in this community

as Pee-wee Herman.

All you other shoppers will just have

to play second fiddle to Pee-wee.

I guess that's just the way things are around here.

My whole purpose in life is to serve Pee-wee Herman,

and everything else comes second.

There's your sandwich.

Is there anything else I can do for you, Pee-wee?

Well, I would like a pickle if it's not too much trouble.Oh!

No! No trouble at all, Pee-wee.

Sorry, Otis. Sorry, Deke. Game's over.

Pee-wee Herman wants a pickle.

Here. Here's your darn pickle. Are you happy now?

Mmm-hmm.[BELL RINGING]

[THUNDER RUMBLING]Listen up, everybody.

What's up, Sheriff?

I just got a call from Porterville.

There's a big storm heading this way.

You folks better get on home. Smiley, you start boarding up the store.

[THUNDER RUMBLING]

Otis, can you give me and Vance a ride?

OTIS: Ain't got no room.

Deke! Deke, can you give me and Vance a ride?

No.

PEE-WEE: Hurry, Vance!I'm hurrying!

Vance!Yeah.

Get the animals into the storm shelter.

But what about you?

Don't worry about me, Vance.

I'll be okay.

[NEIGHING]

Women and chickens first!

[BLEATING]

[GRUNTING]

VANCE: Watch your step. Single file.

[MOOING]

Whoa!

[HENS CLUCKING]

Come on, now, everybody.

There's nothing to be scared of.

It's only a storm.

We're safe down here.

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

Come on. Let's dance.

[THUNDER RUMBLING][BLEATING]

[COW MOOING]

[RECORD SCRATCHING, MUSIC STOPS]

[HUMMING]

Listen.Sounds like the storm's over.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

MAN: Sudan!

MAN: Sudan.

MAN: Sudan![ELEPHANT TRUMPETING]

Where are you, Sudan?

[GRUNTING]

MAN: Sudan.

Hey! Don't just stand there.

Help! Come on!

MAN: Sudan!

[GRUNTS]

You okay, boss?

Well, my shins are banged up pretty bad.

I think my ribs are broke.

And it feels like I punctured a major organ, Andy.

But I'm circus. Come on, get me out of here.

Right, boss.

Otto, grab a couple of roustabouts and set these wagons straight.

Yeah, boss.

Andy!ANDY: Yes.

You get over to the cookhouse and see that everybody's all right.

ANDY: Right, boss.

Is this your farm, kid?

Yep. I'm Pee-wee Herman.

Mace Montana, manager of the Cabrini Circus.

Nice to meet you, Mr. Montana.

Mace! You got to do something. I can't get to the first-aid supplies,

and people are hurt, and the animals are loose everywhere,

and the equipment...Pull yourself together, Snowball.

[GASPING]I've got a first-aid kit in my house, Mr. Montana.

Get going, kid.

Pull! Pull!

ANDY: Give me a hand.[NEIGHING]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Oh, scusi.

Hey, you got a hose around here?

Over here.

WOMAN: Somebody, help! Water!

MAN: Hang on, Judy.

Here you go, Judy.

Ah!

[GRUNTING]

[GROWLING]

[ROARS]

Hello, kitty.

[SNARLS]

That's a nice kitty.

Boss! We've rounded up all the animals,

except for Sudan. Can't find him anywhere.

[GROWLING]

Oh, my God.

Yes, you are a pretty kitty.

Who's that fluffy kitty?

I'll take him from here. Sudan!

[GROWLS]

Sudan, come on, kitty.

[PEE-WEE LAUGHING]

Come on. Up you go.

You like me, don't you?

[ROARING]Whoa!

Hey, you're all right, kid.

You've got sawdust in your veins.

I do?

Hey, Mace! Where is Midge?

Isn't she in the wagon?

I haven't seen her.

Midge!

Midge!

Has anybody seen my wife?

WOMAN: No, Mace.

Oh, my God. Come on. Fan out, everybody.

I want you to cover every inch of this farm until you find her.

Get moving.

Midge!

Midge!

Mace! Over here! I found her!

MACE: Thank God you're all right, darling.

Oh, I'm all right. What a blow!

Hey, Pee-wee, come here.

Pee-wee, this is my wife, Midge.

Midge, this is Pee-wee Herman.

He runs this place. He's been helping us out.

Uh, no big deal.

I mean, uh, I used to know someone named Midge when I was little.

[PEOPLE CHUCKLING]

Small world.

[LAUGHS] It's all right, kid. Relax. It's nice to meet you.

Likewise, Midge.

[PEOPLE CHUCKLING]

There you go, baby.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

MACE: Okay, everybody, listen up.

We had a bad day.

Lost a couple of wagons.

Tent's banged up pretty bad, and so are some of us.

[ALL MURMURING IN AGREEMENT]

But we've had bad days before, right?

ALL: Right.

We're going to get through this one.

Look, Mace, you can stay here if you need a couple of weeks to get ready.

[ALL LAUGHING]

A couple of weeks, Pee-wee? Our show goes on tonight.

Dell! Can you jerry-rig some of that rigging?

I think so, Mace.

Ellen, how's that leg? Can you go on?

I'm okay, Mace, but I don't think Jimmy's up to it.

I know the act, Mace. I'll go on for Jimmy.

That's the spirit, Duke. Oscar, how are the animals?

They will be all right once they settle down, boss.

Uh... My truck's got a busted axle.

You can use my tractor.

Thank you.

All right, then, everybody, what are we going to do?

ALL: We're going to put on a show!

MACE: That's right.

Because we're part of the greatest show-business tradition in the world.

And what's that?ALL: The circus!

[ALL CHEERING]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

All right, let's move it!

[ELEPHANT TRUMPETING]

What's all this racket?

What do you people want around here?

We don't want anything, sir.

Mace Montana, manager of the Cabrini Circus.

"Circus"? Well, I never.

We're here to give you the best darn show you ever seen.

Well, we don't want it.WOMAN: That's right.

Now, please, everybody. We've worked awful hard

to get this show ready for you nice folks.

Save your smooth talking, Mr. Wyoming.

We told you, we don't want no circus here.

Mmm-hmm!And you show folk ain't welcome in this town.

Are they?WOMAN: That's right.

MAN 1: No!MAN 2: No!

Townspeople! Listen to me.

You are getting very sleepy.[BELL CHIMING SOFTLY]

Your eyelids are getting very heavy.

You will enjoy the circus.

You will enjoy the circus.

We don't want no trouble, mister.

Come on, everybody.

Let's get these wagons turned around.

I don't know what to make of it, kid.

What do you mean, Mace?

Well, Pee-wee, when people don't want a circus,

the world just doesn't make much sense.

What do you mean, Mace?

You know, I'm a guy who spent most of his life

taking the world's frown and trying to turn it into a smile.

What do you mean, Mace?

It's funny. For the first time, I wonder if that's worth doing.

What do you mean, Mace?

Hey, boss. Everybody wants to know where we're heading.

Are we, uh, moving on tonight?

I don't know, Big John.

You got to tell them something, Mace.

Hey, I got an idea. Why don't you all stay on my farm for a little while?

Sounds like you could use a vacation.

A vacation?

Big John, tell everybody we're going on vacation.

[CROWING]

[TRUMPETING]

[PEE-WEE YAWNING]

Hey!

There's a line here.

Oh.

[SEAL GRUNTING]

Come on, get out of there, Lucille.

[WATER SPLASHING][MERMAID MOANS]

[GIGGLES]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

ZELDA: I love you, Daisy.

You help Zelda with her beard.

[LAUGHS]

I love you. Good friend to Zelda.

You...

VANCE: It's like a zoo in there.

[COW MOOING]

MAN: Heads up.

Morning, Mace.

Morning, Pee-wee.

Quite a place you've got here.

I hope we're not putting you out.

"Putting me out"?

[LAUGHS]

Of course you're not putting me out.

[GROWLS]

[INDSTINCT CHATTER CONTINUES]

[GRUNTING]

[GRUNTING]

[GIGGLES]

Well, everybody's fed and watered except you.

Midge made a little something for you.

[HORSE NEIGHING]

Mmm! Boy, guess I better not go swimming for an hour, huh?

[GIGGLES]

That's Daisy.

[SCREAMS][DAISY TRUMPETING]

[LAUGHING]

[DAISY TRUMPETING]

These are the Piccolapupula Brothers.

The greatest acrobats in the world.

Hey, over here!

[ALL LAUGHING]

You're a natural, Pee-wee.

Thanks, Mace. [GIGGLES]

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

Excuse me.

Come on, Pee-wee. I want you to meet Gina.

Our star attraction.

Gina.

Hey, Gina. Come on down here. I want you to meet somebody.

[PANTING]

Hey. Are you okay?

Are you all right?

You okay?

We meet again, no?

No. I mean, yes. [STAMMERING] I...

Well, hello.Hello.

Gina, Pee-wee. Pee-wee, Gina.

Nice to meet you.

[LAUGHS]

I like it very much around here. It's very beautiful.

So are you.

Thank you. You are so sweet.

I know you are, but what am I?

[LAUGHS] Pee-wee.

Say it, don't spray it!

Stop it.

Make me.

GINA: Stop it.

My face hurts.It's killing me.

[BOTH LAUGHING]Pee-wee.

That's my name, Mace. Don't wear it out.

[LAUGHS]Come on, Pee-wee.

Ciao, bella.

Oh, thank you.

[HOLLERING]

MACE: Pee-wee.

Mamma mia.

[GIGGLES]

Hey, looks like Zsa Zsa took a shine to your pig, Pee-wee.

VANCE: Help! Help!

[CHUCKLES]

MAN: Hey, Mace.

Watch your back.

Bombs away, Andy.

Wow, that looks like a fun job.

Being a human cannonball is more than a job, Pee-wee. It's a career.

I'm on my way to a career in agriculture.

I hope to be the next George Washington Carver.

Do you know who George Washington Carver was, Mace?

Yes, I do. The first president of the United States.

[LAUGHS] No. He was a scientist.

His research as an agricultural chemist revolutionized farming.

He was the father of the peanut.

He discovered over 300 uses for it.

Instant coffee, soap and ink, to name just a few.

And don't forget he chopped down that cherry tree.

[BEEPING]

Come on in, Mace. I want to show you something.

Planty, huh, Mace?

What is all this?

The future.

The experiments I'm doing here today will hopefully make

the world of tomorrow a better place to live.

A world where no one will go hungry.

And people will live together in peace.

A world full of giant cantaloupes, huh?

Amazing.

I'd like to show you something else, Mace, but it's top secret.

You have to give me your word that this is just between you and me.

All right.

Then repeat after me.

I, Mace Montana...

"I, Mace Montana..."

Do solemnly swear...

"Do solemnly swear..."

That I will never tell anyone...

"That I'll never tell anyone..."

What I'm about to see.

"What I'm about to see..."

What I am about to see.

"What I'm about to see."

Wow!

I call this the hot-dog tree.

Because, well, it's a hot-dog tree.

See that space right there, Mace?

That's where my Nobel Prize is going to go.

I've never seen anything like it.

You've got ideas in here that nobody's ever had before, Pee-wee.

Really big ideas.

I need one of those.

Help yourself, Mace.

Not a hot dog. I need an idea. Something brand-new.

An idea so big and so new,

it'll knock people right off their feet.

And bring a spark back to the Cabrini Circus.

I've got some thinking to do.

Thanks, Pee-wee.

Ah...

Lunch with Winnie.

[LAUGHS]

Gina!

[TRUMPETING]

Hi.

Thank you.

Thank you. No.

Do you want to walk with me and Flora?May I?

Yes. Come on, Flora.

[TRUMPETING]

Steady, Flora.

Look, Pee-wee.

[NEIGHING]

Hootla. Hootla.

[TRUMPETING]

Miss! Miss!

Miss!

MAN: What will it be? The usual?

Miss, please, we're starving over here.

Excuse me. We were here before them.

What do we have to do to get served over here?

I'm gonna take a bite out of that broad's bazoo if she doesn't get over here now.

Down, Duke. Don't work yourself into a lather.

Back still bothering you, Herman?

Well, long as I can still get around.

Hey!

He will not go to the doctor.

Come on, everyone, let's get out of here.

[BELL CHIMING]

Hey, stop that.

Well, pick them up, pick them up.

We need some supplies.Oh, you do, do you?

Twenty-five pounds of oatmeal.

We don't have any oatmeal.

Forty yards of twine.

We're all out of twine.

Thirty cans of tomato soup.

We don't carry soup.

What's all that?

Sorry, we're closed."Closed"?

Come on. Get. Get. Don't you people speak English?

Easy, Antonio. Come on.

Guys, andiamos.Let's go.

Well, how'd you make out?

What's the matter with you?

Well where's the stuff? What happened? What?

Looks like you boys got the welcome-wagon treatment, too.

I don't believe this.

Don't bother, lady. They are closed.

Closed at 3:15? [LAUGHS]

Closed to us, anyway.

Are you folks with the circus?

MIDGE: Lucky guess, cutie.

Looks like we got a regular Einstein on our hands.

[ALL LAUGHING]

You shouldn't be so hard to the beautiful lady, Midge.

Oh...

I'm sorry, I guess I shouldn't take it out on you, honey.

Oh, that's okay.

Here, why don't you give me your shopping list, and then I'll go in for you?

Gee, that'd be swell.

Come on, let's get out of sight.

MAN: Okay. Okay.All right. Let's go.

Let's go wait in the alley so they don't see us.

ZELDA: I'm so hungry.

Whee!

Well, that ought to do it for today. Thank you, Mr. Ryan.

My, what an appetite on that girl.

And such a bitsy figure.

It's like they all got up on the wrong side of the bed.

Here she comes.

Oh, gee, thanks a million, honey.

Say, what's your name anyway, cookie?

Oh, Winnie. Winnie Johnson.

Well, it's nice to meet you, Winnie. I'm Midge Montana.

And that's Zelda.

Hello.

Eddie.Hi.

Andy,Ha-ha!

Snowball, Clownie, Duke...How do you do?

MIDGE: And the Piccolapupula Brothers.

I'm Paolo.

I'm Giancarlo.

I'm Dino.

I'm Antonio.

Well, [CHUCKLES] it's very nice to meet all of you, I'm sure.

Perhaps our paths will cross again.

We are staying at Pee-wee Herman's farm.

You are? [LAUGHS] Well, what a coincidence.

I was just on my way over to Pee-wee's.

He missed our lunch today,

and I wanted to bring him his egg-salad sandwich.

ALL: Mmm! Our favorite.

Oh. [LAUGHS]

Say, why don't you hop onboard and hitch a ride with us, girly-girl.

Oh, well, thank you very much.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

WINNIE: Oh, my. [CHUCKLES]

MEN: Ally-up!

[WINNIE LAUGHS]

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]Ah, si,Good.

Goodness, there's so many of you.

There's still one more Piccolapupula to meet. Our sister, Gina.

[ALL LAUGHING]

[TRUMPETING]

[CHUCKLES]

Flora.

[GIGGLES]

Pee-wee, look at those clouds.

Look. That one looks like a camel lounging under a palm tree.

Can you see it?

Yeah. Yeah!

Let's see...

Uh...

That one looks like, um...

An automobile. Yeah?

Yeah, look, it's pulling right into a gas station.

[GIGGLES] Yes.

What about that one?

What does it look like to you?

It looks like a man and a woman.

Kissing.

[SCREAMING] Pee-wee!

Winnie! Wait!

Who was that?

Who? Her? Oh. Uh.

She's my fiancee.

[FLORA TRUMPETING]

That was good.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Mind if I sit here?

No, not at all.

Gina, I have something to say.

Oh, really?

Hey, everybody. Listen.

Pee-wee has something he'd like to say.

Please.

[CHATTER STOPS]

I'll tell everybody later.

[CHATTER RESUMES]

Oh, uh, this must be the Piccolapupula table.

[LAUGHS]

My mistake.

Women. Can't live with them, can't live without them.

Tell me about it.

Whoa!

MACE: All right, everybody, listen up.

I've got an announcement to make.

MAN: What's up, Mace?

Are we moving out?

Are we packing it in?

You're not thinking of cutting the season short, are you, Mace?

Quiet down, everybody. Let him talk.

[WHISTLING]

Go ahead, honeybunch.

We've been putting this show on for a long time now.

Well, that's all over.

[ALL MOANING]

We're putting on a brand-new show!

[ALL CHEERING]

What kind of show, boss?

I'll tell you what kind of snow,

Showball. Snowball.

A show that'll stand the world on its ear.

A show that'll make them all stand up and cheer.

A show that will knock them all down on their rear!

Quiet down, Snowball. Mace is sincere.

That's right. What I've got is a brand-new idear.

It came to me today like a bolt of lightning.

And we got Pee-wee Herman to thank for the whole thing.

[ALL APPLAUDING]

You're welcome, everybody. What's the idea, Mace?

To put together a show with a theme.

There it was, right under my nose.

First thing tomorrow, we start working on it.

The Cabrini Circus presents...

The American Farm!

[ALL CHEERING]

What do you think, boss?

Great, Nikko. Looking good, Birdie.

Could I try that, Mace?

It's not as easy as it looks, Pee-wee. Let me think about it.

Hey, Mace, what do you think? It's a little bit circus and a little bit farm.

Great, Ruby. Don't be afraid to use gingham.

Leave it to me, Mace.

Mace! Mace, I'd look great in a costume like this. Can you picture it?

No.

Hey, Mace.

I'm teaching them how to square-dance.

That's the idea, Oscar.

PEE-WEE: Watch this, Mace.

♪ Dosey-do and around and around Dosey-do and around and around

That's great, Pee-wee.

♪ Dosey-do and around and...

Mace.

Morning, Gina.

I had the most wonderful idea about the new farm theme.

Hi, Gina.

But suddenly, I feel so sick to my stomach that I can't even talk.

[SIGHS]

Can I talk to you for a minute, Mace?

Sure thing, kid.

I have this friend

who has a bit of a problem.

It wouldn't be a romantic problem, would it?

As a matter of fact, Mace, it would.

You see, my friend was engaged to this girl who he thought he was in love with.

But then he met this other girl who, it turned out, he really was in love with.

Look, Pee-wee, love's a crazy thing.

But when it hits you, you know it.

When I met Midge, I knew she was the girl I wanted right away.

But everybody said it wouldn't work.

We knew it would

because we were following our hearts.

I guess I'd tell this friend of yours to do the same thing.

Follow his heart.

Isn't that right, baby?

MIDGE: You said it, honey pie.

[PANTING]

Hello, Winnie.

I wasn't expecting you for lunch today.

Yeah, I know, but,

I wanted to talk to you about yesterday.

I'm really sorry, Winnie.

Well, I must admit, I was a little stunned.

But it had to happen sooner or later.

You're a man.

She's Italian.

Gosh, you're taking this really great, Winnie.

I thought you'd never speak to me again.

Of course I'll speak to you, but our engagement is off.

Gee, Winnie.

Of course, you're free to see

whoever you want.

Really? Well, if you think that's best.

I do, Pee-wee.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Buongiorno,Winnie.

Well, hello there, boys!

[LAUGHS]

Oh, uh, you'll have to excuse me.

My lunch dates have arrived.

[ALL LAUGHING]

WINNIE: Five egg-salad sandwiches, please. [LAUGHS]

[SCREAMING]

How stupid can one person be?

[GRUNTING]

[SCREAMS] Ow!

Winnie certainly seemed broken up about the whole thing.

"Excuse me, Pee-wee. My lunch dates have arrived."

[BLOWS RASPBERRY]

Well, it took four guys to replace you.

And what am I supposed to do about Gina? She won't even talk to me.

You're lucky. Zsa Zsa won't leave me alone.

You know, it's kind of ironic, Pee-wee.

A couple of good-looking bachelors like you and me

having so much girl trouble.

Got to be some way I can tell Gina how I feel.

You know what babes can't resist?

The romantic approach.

[ZSA ZSA GRUNTING]

Uh-oh!

Here we go again.

VANCE: Later, Pee-wee!

The romantic approach.

[SINGING]

[EXCLAIMING IN ITALIAN]

GINA: I can't believe this!

You have to go! Shut up! Shut up!

[SPEAKING ANGRILY IN ITALIAN]

You have to shut up. You understand English?

Shut up! Shut up!

Just shut up and get out of here!

[SHOUTING IN ITALIAN]

[GLASS SHATTERING]

Stupid song.

[CLATTERING]

[GLASS SHATTERING]

[SCREAMS]

Please, Gina, I'm too young to die.

You know what you are?I know how you must feel.

I'll tell you what you are. You're the lowest of the low. Even lower than that.

I know I deserve this, okay?

I'll tell you what you deserve, Mr. Lover-Boy.

Okay, look, Gina. I can't blame you if you never want to speak to me again, okay?

[LAUGHING]

You? Blame me?

[CONTINUES LAUGHING]

It's so funny I forgot to laugh.

I should've told you about Winnie,

but when I was with you, I never even thought about her.

Oh, yeah? And what about today?

When you were with her, you were thinking of me?

Yes, I was, Gina. I went to see Winnie to break off our engagement. I...

What?

I lo...

I lo...

What?

I... I...

What are you saying?

I love you.

[LAUGHS]

[LAUGHS]

[EXCLAIMS]

[LAUGHING]

[GRUNTING]

[LAUGHING]

What's going on, Gina?

I promised Pee-wee I'd help him find an act.

He wants to be in the circus so badly, Mace.

Doesn't look like he's found his niche yet.

No.

[GRUNTING]

[LAUGHING]

Hey, you're falling for this kid.He makes me laugh.

If laughs were all you wanted, you'd have fallen for Snowball.

Snowball is a clown, Mace. Clowns aren't funny.

Pee-wee's not like anyone I ever met.

[PEE-WEE SCREAMING]

MAE: Oh, my good Lord. Look, Nadine.

NADINE: It's Pee-wee Herman, and he's covered with monkeys.

Oh, Mr. Ryan! You naughty boy.What?

Oh, my gosh. Don't look now, Mae,

but the biggest pig I've ever seen is making friends with your bloomers.

[GRUNTING]

[SCREAMING]

Pee-wee?

Pee-wee?

Pee-wee, where are you?

[PEE-WEE GROANING]

Hootla, Daisy, hootla!

[SNORTING]

Hootla.

[TRUMPETING]Good girl.

Pee-wee, I leave you alone for a second, and look at you.

Pretty good, though, huh, Gina? I taught Daisy how to sit.

[LAUGHS][TRUMPETING]

Okay, Pee-wee, just do what I do.

I think I can manage just spinning a rope.

[GIGGLES]

It's all in the hips, Pee-wee. It's all in the hips.

Whoa, Pee-wee. Stay in one place.

No! Okay.

Stop it, Pee-wee. Stop that.

PEE-WEE: Ow!WOMEN: Ow!

Pee-wee!

GINA: One, two, three. Go, Pee-wee.

Whoa!

Now what?

Pee-wee, you're supposed to let go.

Oh!

[SCREAMS]

Sorry, Gina.

That's okay, Pee-wee. We'll try something else. Okay?

Yeah.

[CRASHES]

Ready when you are, Pee-wee.

Wish me luck.ALL: Good luck.

Be careful.

Go get them, champ.

PEE-WEE: Ready!

[LAUGHS]

[COUGHING]

[LAUGHS]

What's this all about, Andy?

Watch.

MALE VOICE: Human oddities from around the world.

Zelda the Bearded Lady, a tragic victim of her own "hairmones."

Feast your eyes on the magnificent Eddie.

She's big. She's beautiful.

But don't get too close, she's hungry.

Ruth and Dot, the Siamese twins.

Never alone, chained for life, they share everything.

Their pain, their pleasure, their pelvis.

What you see before you now is a hermaphrodite.

Half man, half woman. Say hello to Shim.

The only creature on earth who can legally marry "Shimself."

Get out your magnifying glasses to view Midge,

the tiniest woman in the world.

But please don't touch the "Midgendise."

That don't go for you, doll. [SCOFFS LOUDLY]

Don't I know that, baby.

Duke the Dog-Faced Boy.

Will he put his slippers on or chew them up?

Trisha the Human Pretzel, so fine, so flexible.

Ooh! Thanks, Trish.

Judy the Mermaid. Half beautiful woman, half flounder.

And finally, a being which defies description.

[YELLS]

That's really it, Gina.

I give up trying to be in the circus.

Don't try to talk me out of it.

Come in.

Sit down.

What's this?Open it.

Wow.

It belonged to a great man, Pee-wee.

[SOFTLY] Papa Piccolapupula.

He was the greatest aerialist that ever lived.

Until one day he performed the spiral of death.

And...

Well, now he's the greatest aerialist that ever died.

[SNIFFS]

I'm sorry, Gina.

But why give this costume to me? I don't deserve it.

No, when he gave me this,

he whispered in my ear and he said,

"One day, my pretty little Piccolapupula,

[SNIFFLES]

"you're going to give this to the man that you love."

What's going to happen to us, Pee-wee?

Nothing. Nothing's going to happen to us. What do you mean?

I mean that we'll be moving on. That's what circuses do.

And when the circus will go, I'll go with it.

I thought I'd be going with you.

Pee-wee, I couldn't let you do that.

You have a wonderful life here. You have your work.

What could you have in the circus?

You.

No.

You're all I care about, Gina.

No, it wouldn't work. I know.

You'd come to resent me for taking you away from all this.

No, I wouldn't.

Hold me.

Good morning, Vance.

[GRUNTING] Morning, Pee-wee.

[INHALES]

Beautiful day, huh? [GIGGLES]

It's okay.

[HUMMING]

[VOCALIZING]

[LAUGHS]

My, we are certainly in a good mood this morning.

That, my dear Vance, is the understatement of the year.

Everything seems completely different to me today.

The air smells so fresh.

The sky seems a brand-new shade of blue.

I don't think I've ever noticed the beauty of this leaf.

And, Vance, have you always been so handsome?

What the...

Who's my handsome little baby?

[GRUNTING]

Who's my handsome little baby?[SQUEALING]

How are you today?

Hungry, eh?

Vance, come here!

What happened?

I don't know.

I must have made some slight miscalculation.

Hmm. Guess so. Interesting.

Well, now we have cocktail wieners.

[PEOPLE APPLAUDING OUTSIDE]

Wow, what a great act!

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Pee-wee, aren't you going to congratulate Winnie?

She probably wouldn't want to talk to me.

MAN: Congratulations.

Hi, Pee-wee.

Boy, that was really spectacular.

Oh, thanks, Pee-wee. That means a lot to me.

Really? I'm glad you feel that way.

Well, I'm glad you feel that way. [LAUGHS]

Guess we both still really like each other, huh?

I still like you, Pee-wee. [CHUCKLES]

I still like you, too.

Boy, what a day, huh?

Things sure have worked out great for both of us, huh, Winnie?

Breaking up with you is the best thing that's ever happened to me.

I never felt so alive since we broke up.

I've never felt so free, so beautiful, so sure of myself.

Okay, Winnie, I get your point.

Friends?

Friends.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

All right, everybody. Listen up.

The brand-new Cabrini Circus opens tonight.

[ALL CHEERING]

[EXCLAIMING]

Sheriff? Sheriff. Sheriff.

This is a great night for the Cabrini Circus.

I want to thank each and every one of you

for working so hard to make it happen.

[ALL CHEERING]

[BARKING]

Mace, Mace, Mace!WOMAN: People coming, Mace.

[BARKING CONTINUES]

Looks like we got some customers.

Pee-wee Herman, you're under arrest.

What?

I hope you can love a convict, Gina.

Uh. Just a minute here. What are the charges, Sheriff?

Defacing public property.

Permitting and, or propagating

the mingling of wild and domesticated animals.

Getting groceries under false pretenses.

And attempted murder.

ALL: "Murder"?

I know you sent that hippo out to kill me.

Look, Sheriff, Pee-wee's not to blame.

Perhaps if we all just sit down and talk about it for a moment,

I'm sure there's something we can do.

There is something you can do.

You can pack up this flea circus and get out of town. Right now. And then,

well, maybe I can see my way clear to dropping the charges.

All right, we'll go.

No!

Good for you.

All right, everybody, you heard the man.

Let's start packing.

Mace, you can't leave. We didn't even get to put on the show.

We'll do the show somewhere else, Pee-wee.

We can't let you end up in jail. That's that.

I'll get them to change their minds, Mace.

Somehow.

Here's to Mr. Ryan and the Sheriff.Yes.

For getting rid of those circus people.

Hip-hip-hooray!

ALL: Hip-hip-hooray!

Hip-hip-hooray!Hip-hip-hooray!

Hip-hip-hooray!Hip-hip-hooray!

Wish me luck.

[BELL CHIMING]

Hello, everyone.

What are you doing here?

I just came to join the party. You were right all along.

From now on, I'm going to be just like you.

Oh!

[CLINKING]

Swell party.

Anyone care for some hors d'oeuvres?

What you got there?

Mmm. Cocktail wieners. Don't mind if I do.

I'll have one, too.

Help yourselves, everyone.

[EXCITED CHATTER]

Mmm. Those are the best wieners I've ever tasted.

Whoa!

[LAUGHING]

Whoa!

[CLAMORING]

Congratulations, Pee-wee.Thanks, Vance.

Congratulations to you, too. Come on, we better get out to the circus.

"Circus"? Did you say circus?

Why, yes, I did.

I don't suppose any of you'd like to come along, would you?

ALL: Me!

Come on!

[TRUMPETING]

[BAND PLAYING]

♪ Join with us and march along

♪ Sing our Big Top Barnyard Song

♪ We're the Barnyard Circus And we're down on the farm

♪ We'll stay forever You don't have to twist our arm

♪ Join with us and march along

♪ Sing our Big Top Barnyard Song

♪ Everyone come on And you can each take a bow

♪ And join the Barnyard Circus now

♪ Hey!

♪ We all begin as kernels Dropped into fertile ground

♪ Add sun and rain, and we become The best taste treat around

♪ There's nothing like a circus For when you're feeling down

♪ Put on a wig, a funny nose And turn into a clown ♪

Peanuts! Popcorn! Hot dogs!

♪ Everybody's learning how

♪ From the zebra to the cow

♪ And now the elephant's Perfected a "moo"

♪ Each time the band strikes up "Cock-a-doodle-doo"

♪ Join with us and march along

♪ Sing our Big Top Barnyard Song

♪ Everyone come on And you can each take a bow

♪ And join the Barnyard Circus now

♪ Hey!

♪ Our lives are never boring We're each of us unique

♪ We're always meeting people Who consider us quite chic

♪ I sow the seeds and harvest And that's the farmer's life

♪ I cook and sew and clean and bake 'Cause I'm the farmer's wife

♪ Don't be afraid That you're too small

♪ Here's where everybody's Ten feet tall

♪ Our strength is that We all have heart

♪ We're all so close We'll never be apart

♪ A needle in a haystack Is very hard to find

♪ And I'm so glad he took the time 'Cause he's so big and kind

♪ I met this little woman We had an awkward date

♪ But when he got to know me Well, he chose me for his mate

♪ In this place we're singing of

♪ Anyone can fall in love

♪ When I first met this hippo I was really quite rude

♪ Now that we're together I'm so glad I was pursued

♪ Join with us and march along[VOCALIZING]

♪ Sing our Big Top Barnyard Song

♪ They're a crazy combination That we all know

♪ But we're a Barnyard Circus Show

♪ Each of us is love struck It's plain as it can be

♪ We all flipped over Winnie's Egg-salad recipe

♪ Each said he was the best one Such choices I abhor

♪ But when I made my mind up I decided on all four

♪ And if at times Love gets too hard

♪ Then start a circus In your own backyard

♪ With you, I want to harmonize

♪ I feel the same And now my big surprise ♪

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

Ladies and gentlemen, the Cabrini Circus proudly presents,

for the first time anywhere,

Pee-wee Herman![APPLAUSE]

[FANFARE]

[DRUM ROLLING]

[EXCLAIMS][AUDIENCE GASPS]

[CLUCKING]

[AUDIENCE GASPS]

[AUDIENCE CHEERS]

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

♪ Here's the way we quench our thirst

♪ Quench our thirst, quench our thirst

♪ Here's the way we quench our thirst

♪ At the refreshment counter

♪ Now's the time to yum, yum, yum Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum

♪ Now's the time to yum, yum, yum

♪ At the refreshment counter

♪ Popcorn, drinks and candy too Candy too, candy too

♪ Popcorn, drinks and candy too

♪ At the refreshment counter

♪ At the refreshment counter

♪ At the refreshment counter