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1
00:00:38,960 --> 00:00:41,240
SEAGULLS CALL
2
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{\an8}Is he really here?
He is, yeah.
3
00:00:46,440 --> 00:00:49,560
{\an8}Do you think he got my letter
at the North Pole?
4
00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:50,920
{\an8}Of course he did.
5
00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:53,600
{\an8}Daddy, did you write him a letter?
6
00:00:53,640 --> 00:00:55,800
{\an8}Er, no. I didn't, James, no.
Oh.
7
00:00:57,280 --> 00:00:58,520
{\an8}Oh, look at that.
8
00:00:58,560 --> 00:01:02,080
{\an8}Haven't they done a wonderful job
with the tree this year? Hm.
9
00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:05,600
{\an8}CAROLLERS:# Good King Wenceslas
Looked out on the Feast of Stephen
10
00:01:05,640 --> 00:01:09,120
{\an8}# When the snow lay round about
Deep and crisp and even... #
11
00:01:09,160 --> 00:01:10,600
TURKEY GOBBLES
12
00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:13,800
Hey, fancy guessing the weight
of the turkey, Doc?
13
00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:16,240
One pound, two guesses.
No.
14
00:01:16,280 --> 00:01:19,680
He's very friendly. Turns out
turkeys got a lot of personality.
15
00:01:19,720 --> 00:01:23,480
Hm. Make sure you wash your hands.
They're filthy.
16
00:01:23,520 --> 00:01:24,840
TURKEY GOBBLES
17
00:01:24,880 --> 00:01:27,120
CAROLLERS CONTINUE
18
00:01:28,600 --> 00:01:31,080
Has there always been Christmas?
19
00:01:31,120 --> 00:01:32,800
Yeah.
Er, no.
20
00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:34,280
Well, not ALWAYS always.
21
00:01:34,320 --> 00:01:36,160
No, it used to be called
the Winter Solstice,
22
00:01:36,200 --> 00:01:37,320
but in the fourth century,
23
00:01:37,360 --> 00:01:40,200
Pope Julius chose
the 25th of December for Christmas
24
00:01:40,240 --> 00:01:42,960
because he wanted to replace
the pagan Saturnalia festival.
25
00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:45,120
James!
26
00:01:45,160 --> 00:01:47,760
Jenny.
Hi!
27
00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:50,600
Mm, delicious!
Careful, Doc!
28
00:01:50,640 --> 00:01:53,000
Another inch,
you're under the mistletoe.
29
00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:56,040
Anyone who wanted
could lay a smacker on you.
30
00:01:56,080 --> 00:01:57,960
SHE GULPS
What?
31
00:01:58,000 --> 00:02:00,480
Mrs Tishell...
32
00:02:00,520 --> 00:02:04,000
No, I'm fine, Doc. I'm just fine.
33
00:02:05,320 --> 00:02:07,240
It's so nice to see you here, Doc.
34
00:02:07,280 --> 00:02:08,880
How long has this food been outside?
35
00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:10,440
Only since this morning.
36
00:02:10,480 --> 00:02:13,520
You should wear a hair net.
It's unhygienic.
37
00:02:13,560 --> 00:02:16,760
CAROLLERS:# Nine ladies dancing
Eight maids a-milking
38
00:02:16,800 --> 00:02:19,560
# Seven swans a-swimming
Six geese a-laying
39
00:02:19,600 --> 00:02:23,840
# Five gold rings... #
40
00:02:23,880 --> 00:02:26,120
I think that's my favourite song.
41
00:02:26,160 --> 00:02:28,680
Yeah, as Christmas ones go,
it's all right.
42
00:02:28,720 --> 00:02:31,640
No, not my favourite Christmas song.
My favourite song ever.
43
00:02:31,680 --> 00:02:35,400
This guy buys this girl
all these amazing gifts.
44
00:02:35,440 --> 00:02:38,160
Five gold rings,
four calling birds,
45
00:02:38,200 --> 00:02:42,400
three French men...
It's so romantic.
46
00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:44,960
I got you some eggnog.
47
00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:47,200
Oh, yeah, thanks.
48
00:02:47,240 --> 00:02:48,880
Happy Christmas!
49
00:02:48,920 --> 00:02:51,040
Oh, hello, James! Ha-ha.
50
00:02:51,080 --> 00:02:53,520
Are you here to see Santa?
51
00:02:53,560 --> 00:02:55,160
That'll be ยฃ10, please, Doc.
52
00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:56,960
ยฃ10?
Yeah.
53
00:02:57,000 --> 00:02:58,440
Oh... It's fine. Thanks.
54
00:02:58,480 --> 00:03:00,200
Thank you.
55
00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:02,240
ยฃ10, really (!)
56
00:03:02,280 --> 00:03:04,720
Merry Christmas, Doc.
57
00:03:04,760 --> 00:03:07,360
And what do you want for Christmas?
58
00:03:07,400 --> 00:03:09,840
Oh, an actual list. Excellent.
59
00:03:09,880 --> 00:03:12,520
Ho-ho-ho-ho!
Laura, look this way.
60
00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:14,680
And here's your present.
61
00:03:14,720 --> 00:03:16,200
Yeah, don't forget.
62
00:03:16,240 --> 00:03:18,240
Merry Christmas. Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!
63
00:03:18,280 --> 00:03:20,720
Urgh, look at him.
Martin.
64
00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:25,400
He keeps scratching.
65
00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:26,880
What, Santa?
66
00:03:26,920 --> 00:03:28,920
Well, he's probably just hot
under the lights.
67
00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:31,480
Disgusting!
Oi, Doc, move up.
68
00:03:31,520 --> 00:03:34,400
Ah, what do we have here?
69
00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:38,320
A smartly dressed young man
with a very nice tie.
70
00:03:38,360 --> 00:03:40,280
Did you tie that yourself?
71
00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:42,200
How wonderful.
72
00:03:42,240 --> 00:03:43,720
And what do you want for Christmas?
73
00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:46,080
Look, don't, Martin.
Excuse me.
74
00:03:46,120 --> 00:03:48,760
I'm afraid you'll
have to join the queue, big boy.
75
00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:50,960
You keep scratching.
Is there something wrong?
76
00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:53,840
Santa's got a new costume
and the material's a bit itchy.
77
00:03:53,880 --> 00:03:56,760
Now, come and tell Santa
what you want for Christmas.
78
00:03:56,800 --> 00:03:58,480
Uh-uh, no. Don't go any closer.
79
00:03:58,520 --> 00:04:00,120
He could be contagious. Let me see.
80
00:04:00,160 --> 00:04:02,600
You're being ridiculous.
Show me, please.
81
00:04:04,360 --> 00:04:07,560
Doc, you're holding up the line!
Leave Santa alone!
82
00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:10,240
Leave it, Martin.
Excuse me, what's the hold-up?
83
00:04:10,280 --> 00:04:12,560
Here, Doc, you're gonna
have to come out of there.
84
00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:15,280
This man has a potentially
infectious disease.
85
00:04:15,320 --> 00:04:18,400
That rash could be shingles,
erysipelas or scabies.
86
00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:20,720
A virus, a bacteria or a parasite.
87
00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:23,000
Do you really want to infect
your children? Do you?
88
00:04:23,040 --> 00:04:25,200
Right, I want you to come with me.
Seriously?
89
00:04:25,240 --> 00:04:27,800
Seriously. Come with me.
You need to fumigate this place.
90
00:04:27,840 --> 00:04:29,720
Doc, I think you're over-reacting,
just a tad.
91
00:04:29,760 --> 00:04:32,760
Shut it down. Come on.
Sorry, he does mean well.
92
00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:35,360
Right, you heard what the doc said.
Everybody out.
93
00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:38,320
Come on now. Out you go.
I'm sorry, no returns.
94
00:04:38,360 --> 00:04:41,440
That's what I said, no returns.
I'm sorry, don't be sad.
95
00:04:41,480 --> 00:04:43,760
We'll come back next year.
96
00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:46,440
There'll be other Santas,
other grottos.
97
00:04:47,920 --> 00:04:50,080
You get on the examination table,
please.
98
00:04:50,120 --> 00:04:52,080
Take off your boot
and roll up your trouser leg.
99
00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:56,880
How long have you had this for?
A week or so.
100
00:04:56,920 --> 00:04:59,800
I'm sorry, I can't hear what you're
saying. Take that beard off.
101
00:05:05,200 --> 00:05:07,800
Probably allergic to the material
in the costume.
102
00:05:07,840 --> 00:05:09,720
Do you have a history of allergies?
103
00:05:09,760 --> 00:05:13,440
No. Do you have a history
of ruining Christmas?
104
00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:14,920
I didn't ruin Christmas.
105
00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:17,800
All those traumatised children
who saw you drag away Santa
106
00:05:17,840 --> 00:05:19,440
might well disagree on that.
107
00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:21,640
It doesn't look like
an allergic reaction to me.
108
00:05:21,680 --> 00:05:24,760
I'll do a punch biopsy.
A biopsy?
109
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:26,960
Won't I have to go to hospital
for that?
110
00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:29,760
Er, no.
This has a blade which removes
111
00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:32,400
a small plug of skin through
the epidermis and the dermis,
112
00:05:32,440 --> 00:05:33,920
into the subcutaneous fat below.
113
00:05:33,960 --> 00:05:37,760
Do you have any other symptoms?
At my age, there's always something.
114
00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:40,600
Aches and pains, wear and tear.
115
00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:45,040
I lost some weight. Stomach's been
a bit dodgy. Probably nerves.
116
00:05:45,080 --> 00:05:46,680
Nerves?
117
00:05:46,720 --> 00:05:50,120
My job is to bring joy and wonder
to the children of Portwenn.
118
00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:51,680
I take that seriously.
119
00:05:51,720 --> 00:05:54,720
Do you suffer from fatigue?
I don't suffer, Doc.
120
00:05:54,760 --> 00:05:56,640
I enjoy the work.
121
00:05:56,680 --> 00:05:59,560
But, yes, it does take a lot
out of me, I suppose.
122
00:05:59,600 --> 00:06:03,320
Right, I'll take a blood sample,
check if you're anaemic or not.
123
00:06:03,360 --> 00:06:06,920
Poke away. So long as it lets me
get back out there and do my job.
124
00:06:06,960 --> 00:06:09,160
Er, no, you're not to mix
with children, I'm afraid.
125
00:06:09,200 --> 00:06:11,560
Until we've discovered
if you're infectious or not.
126
00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:17,800
I-I've got a big surprise lined up
for the village on Christmas Eve.
127
00:06:17,840 --> 00:06:19,360
I really don't wanna let folk down.
128
00:06:19,400 --> 00:06:22,240
I'm sorry, you're not going anywhere
until we have your test results.
129
00:06:22,280 --> 00:06:24,480
I should have the blood
available tomorrow
130
00:06:24,520 --> 00:06:26,680
and the biopsy sometime next week.
131
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:28,200
Not a fan of Christmas, are you?
132
00:06:28,240 --> 00:06:30,960
I don't have any feelings about it
either way.
133
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:32,960
Doesn't come across my desk.
134
00:06:34,120 --> 00:06:37,840
Somebody needs to show you
the true magic of the season, Doc.
135
00:06:37,880 --> 00:06:40,600
I'm sure they do, thank you.
And we're finished for now.
136
00:06:46,880 --> 00:06:48,720
Close the door on your way out,
please.
137
00:07:00,440 --> 00:07:02,120
How are you?
138
00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:04,440
Is Santa angry at us?
139
00:07:04,480 --> 00:07:07,320
No, of course not.
140
00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:10,880
I didn't get to meet him.
141
00:07:10,920 --> 00:07:14,520
I'm sorry. It's such a shame.
142
00:07:16,080 --> 00:07:17,720
Here, come and sit down.
143
00:07:21,160 --> 00:07:22,760
Aw...
144
00:07:22,800 --> 00:07:25,520
You know, when I was your age,
145
00:07:25,560 --> 00:07:27,920
Portwenn used to have
a lantern parade on Christmas Eve.
146
00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:29,200
And it was so lovely.
147
00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:31,880
All these lights
would be coming down the hill,
148
00:07:31,920 --> 00:07:33,920
with Santa Claus at the front.
149
00:07:33,960 --> 00:07:36,080
Can we do that?
150
00:07:36,120 --> 00:07:42,000
Well, no, cos someone would need
to arrange and organise it.
151
00:07:42,040 --> 00:07:45,200
You could.
Oh, I didn't mean me.
152
00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:48,240
And I could get to meet Santa.
153
00:07:48,280 --> 00:07:49,560
Well, yeah, you could,
154
00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:52,240
but it's Christmas Eve tomorrow,
so...
155
00:07:52,280 --> 00:07:53,760
Please.
156
00:07:55,480 --> 00:07:57,440
..so I suppose
I'd better get a move on, right?
157
00:07:57,480 --> 00:07:59,160
Yes.
158
00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:05,040
Tomorrow? That's short notice.
159
00:08:05,080 --> 00:08:08,120
I just want James to have
a Christmas he won't forget.
160
00:08:08,160 --> 00:08:11,800
You know, I have all these
happy memories of it as a child.
161
00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:14,360
You know, the parade and the lights.
162
00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:16,800
And I still remember the little
red bike my father gave me
163
00:08:16,840 --> 00:08:18,040
when I was four.
164
00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:20,920
Yes, probably stolen.
Martin!
165
00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:23,200
PHONE RINGS
166
00:08:27,480 --> 00:08:29,160
Ellingham.
167
00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:30,880
Yes.
168
00:08:30,920 --> 00:08:32,080
I am.
169
00:08:35,840 --> 00:08:37,440
Ah...
170
00:08:37,480 --> 00:08:38,800
I see.
171
00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:42,560
Right.
172
00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:44,160
When would that be?
173
00:08:45,920 --> 00:08:48,440
Yes. I see.
174
00:08:50,120 --> 00:08:51,240
Thank you.
175
00:08:53,840 --> 00:08:55,000
Everything OK?
176
00:08:56,640 --> 00:08:59,760
Er, that was the, er,
London Royal Hospital.
177
00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:03,880
My mother died of a heart attack
at 11 o'clock this morning.
178
00:09:06,560 --> 00:09:08,080
Oh, Martin...
179
00:09:10,520 --> 00:09:11,800
I'm so sorry.
180
00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:16,800
I should tell Ruth, I suppose.
181
00:09:18,320 --> 00:09:20,160
After lunch, maybe.
182
00:09:23,360 --> 00:09:24,800
Come here.
183
00:09:31,560 --> 00:09:33,520
It's... I don't want the fish
to get dry.
184
00:09:39,480 --> 00:09:41,760
There goes the Grinch.
CHUCKLING
185
00:09:41,800 --> 00:09:43,560
Thanks for ruining Christmas!
186
00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:45,760
Tosser!
Tosser!Tosser!
187
00:09:50,680 --> 00:09:52,280
KNOCK AT DOOR
188
00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:59,360
Hello, Martin. Come in.
Thank you.
189
00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:04,280
You'll have to forgive me.
I'm experimenting with eggnog.
190
00:10:06,360 --> 00:10:07,680
What is it?
191
00:10:07,720 --> 00:10:12,320
Er, my mother suffered a
heart attack this morning and died.
192
00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:14,920
Oh, dear.
193
00:10:14,960 --> 00:10:17,760
I'm sorry to hear that.
Mm.
194
00:10:17,800 --> 00:10:19,200
Erm...
195
00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:21,000
Oh, when will the funeral be?
196
00:10:21,040 --> 00:10:24,080
Sometime between Christmas
and the new year.
197
00:10:24,120 --> 00:10:27,040
May I ask how you're feeling?
198
00:10:28,400 --> 00:10:30,800
Erm, I'm-I'm fine.
We weren't very close.
199
00:10:30,840 --> 00:10:32,480
She was your mother.
200
00:10:32,520 --> 00:10:34,720
She stole my clock.
201
00:10:34,760 --> 00:10:37,000
Don't be too hard on yourself,
Martin.
202
00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:41,320
Grief has a way
of stealing up on us all,
203
00:10:41,360 --> 00:10:43,360
even when we think we're free of it.
204
00:10:43,400 --> 00:10:45,600
Honestly, I'm fine.
205
00:10:45,640 --> 00:10:47,080
Poor Margaret.
206
00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:52,240
I always hoped that she'd become
the mother that you deserved, but...
207
00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:56,320
Oh, well,
I won't speak ill of the dead.
208
00:10:58,600 --> 00:11:01,400
She was an awful woman
and a terrible mother.
209
00:11:01,440 --> 00:11:03,120
I thought
you weren't going to speak ill.
210
00:11:04,200 --> 00:11:05,600
I was being polite.
211
00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:13,800
'How much?'
212
00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:16,680
No, but seriously.
213
00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:20,080
Look, I know it's short notice,
but...
214
00:11:21,120 --> 00:11:22,640
I'm gonna have to call you back.
215
00:11:24,680 --> 00:11:26,640
Hello, Louisa.
What can I do for you?
216
00:11:26,680 --> 00:11:30,520
Joe, you've, er,
got a little something on your face.
217
00:11:30,560 --> 00:11:33,760
It's for, erm, undercover work.
218
00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:36,000
Well, I'm here because
I'd like to organise
219
00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:38,040
a lantern parade for tomorrow.
220
00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:40,680
A lantern parade?
Haven't had one of those for years.
221
00:11:40,720 --> 00:11:43,120
Unfortunately,
from a police standpoint,
222
00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:44,640
tomorrow's just not possible.
223
00:11:44,680 --> 00:11:47,880
Oh... Oh, that's a shame.
Mm.
224
00:11:47,920 --> 00:11:50,720
Because I was gonna ask you
to be Santa and lead the parade.
225
00:11:50,760 --> 00:11:55,280
Well, when I say not possible,
I mean not...
226
00:11:55,320 --> 00:11:57,280
NOT possible.
227
00:11:57,320 --> 00:11:59,440
So it... it is possible?
228
00:11:59,480 --> 00:12:01,640
I'm here to help. What do we need?
229
00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:03,680
Well, we need lanterns.
About 40 or 50.
230
00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:06,840
No problem. I'll talk to Bert.
Great. And can you spread the word?
231
00:12:06,880 --> 00:12:10,280
Just to confirm,
I shall be playing Santa Claus
232
00:12:10,320 --> 00:12:11,520
and leading the parade?
233
00:12:11,560 --> 00:12:14,680
Yeah.
Wonderful.
234
00:12:14,720 --> 00:12:18,440
You know, between you and me,
it's not really for undercover work.
235
00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:22,760
I know. I can see your costume
hanging up at the back.
236
00:12:22,800 --> 00:12:26,560
Ha, very good.
You should be a policeman.
237
00:12:26,600 --> 00:12:29,240
HUMMING A TUNE
238
00:12:39,920 --> 00:12:42,320
SHE GULPS
239
00:12:42,360 --> 00:12:45,240
GAGGING
240
00:12:47,520 --> 00:12:50,160
Mrs Tishell, I've come
to pick up my medical supplies
241
00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:51,600
for the holiday period.
242
00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:55,720
What are you doing? Mrs Tishell?
243
00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:57,480
You're choking.
244
00:12:57,520 --> 00:12:59,160
Turn round.
245
00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:09,720
Got it?
Oh... Oh...
246
00:13:09,760 --> 00:13:12,200
Right, just let go.
Oh, thank you, Doctor.
247
00:13:12,240 --> 00:13:13,560
Let go. Let go of my arms.
248
00:13:13,600 --> 00:13:16,280
HOARSELY:Oh, thank you, Doctor.
It went down the wrong way.
249
00:13:18,560 --> 00:13:19,920
You were choking before as well.
250
00:13:19,960 --> 00:13:22,680
Well, I-I-I do need
to take more care in future.
251
00:13:22,720 --> 00:13:24,240
Why is your voice hoarse?
252
00:13:24,280 --> 00:13:27,840
Cos I was singing carols yesterday.
You saved my life, Doctor.
253
00:13:27,880 --> 00:13:30,240
Come here into the light.
Oh...
254
00:13:32,720 --> 00:13:35,560
Mmm... Mm, mm, mm!
255
00:13:36,720 --> 00:13:37,960
No, no, no!
256
00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:40,400
But the mistletoe...!
No!
257
00:13:40,440 --> 00:13:42,320
No, I'll come and collect
my supplies later.
258
00:13:42,360 --> 00:13:44,120
I'm sorry, Doc! I-I had to.
259
00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:46,640
Cos this might be my last...
260
00:13:46,680 --> 00:13:48,680
my last Christmas.
261
00:13:52,640 --> 00:13:55,200
There you go, John.
Cheers, Bert. Merry Christmas.
262
00:13:56,520 --> 00:14:00,560
I know the doc has a job to do,
but so do I.
263
00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:03,960
And it's not fair, you know?
It's just not fair.
264
00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:06,440
Yes, we know.
You keep on saying, Leonard.
265
00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:10,080
Sorry. Don't mean to go on about it.
It's all right.
266
00:14:10,120 --> 00:14:12,720
If you can't go to your local
for a drink and a moan,
267
00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:15,720
where can you go?
It's good to see you in here again.
268
00:14:15,760 --> 00:14:17,360
It's been a while.
269
00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:19,680
It's the children I feel sorry for.
270
00:14:19,720 --> 00:14:22,360
It's a bit of magic in their lives.
271
00:14:22,400 --> 00:14:24,280
Takes me months to make these.
272
00:14:25,640 --> 00:14:27,760
I don't blame the doc.
273
00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:30,480
No, he's to be pitied.
274
00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:32,640
He just...
275
00:14:32,680 --> 00:14:34,920
He just doesn't get it.
276
00:14:34,960 --> 00:14:38,840
But don't worry,
Santa isn't done yet.
277
00:14:38,880 --> 00:14:40,800
Oh!
278
00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:43,280
I think Santa's done for the day
at least.
279
00:14:43,320 --> 00:14:45,800
Best go home and sleep it off, eh?
280
00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:49,000
This isn't like you.
Do you need me to call you a taxi?
281
00:14:49,040 --> 00:14:51,200
No, it's OK.
282
00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:53,560
I've got a sleigh.
283
00:14:53,600 --> 00:14:56,520
Sorry, she kissed you?
Yeah.
284
00:14:56,560 --> 00:14:57,840
On the cheek or...?
285
00:14:57,880 --> 00:15:00,120
No, no, no. On the...
Smack on the mouth.
286
00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:02,960
Maybe she was aiming for the cheek.
No, she wasn't.
287
00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:04,440
It was quite shocking.
288
00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:06,640
And there was this peculiar
metallic tang,
289
00:15:06,680 --> 00:15:08,000
which didn't make it any better.
290
00:15:08,040 --> 00:15:10,680
I'm not sure I wanna know
all the details now, thank you.
291
00:15:10,720 --> 00:15:12,280
Oh, I don't blame you.
292
00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:15,600
Did she say why she did it?
Something about mistletoe.
293
00:15:15,640 --> 00:15:17,040
FOOTSTEPS APPROACH
294
00:15:17,080 --> 00:15:19,920
I've brushed my teeth
and I'm ready for bed.
295
00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,840
Oh, would you like me
to come and read to you?
296
00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:23,480
No.
It's the new one.
297
00:15:23,520 --> 00:15:25,000
I said NO.
298
00:15:25,040 --> 00:15:27,200
James, you don't raise your voice
to your father.
299
00:15:27,240 --> 00:15:29,080
LOW RUMBLING,
STONES CLATTERING
300
00:15:29,120 --> 00:15:31,400
What is that?!
Oh, my God!
301
00:15:31,440 --> 00:15:34,840
THUDDING
It's coming from upstairs.
302
00:15:34,880 --> 00:15:37,400
It's on the roof.
It's Santa Claus!
303
00:15:37,440 --> 00:15:39,120
Don't be ridiculous.
304
00:15:39,160 --> 00:15:40,640
DOG BARKING
305
00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:43,200
Ho-ho-ho!
306
00:15:44,640 --> 00:15:46,880
What are you doing up there?!
307
00:15:46,920 --> 00:15:50,120
I'm showing you
the magic of Christmas!
308
00:15:50,160 --> 00:15:51,760
Well, get down, right now.
309
00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:54,680
Ho-ho-ho-ho!
310
00:15:54,720 --> 00:15:58,080
What's going on? I saw the commotion
from The Platt. Wait, is that...?
311
00:15:58,120 --> 00:16:00,000
It's Santa Claus!
312
00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:02,360
Well, maybe to the untrained eye.
313
00:16:02,400 --> 00:16:04,280
You need to get up there
and get that man down.
314
00:16:04,320 --> 00:16:06,520
He is drunk, he's a danger
to himself and my property.
315
00:16:06,560 --> 00:16:09,640
Follow me.
Please don't hurt Santa.
316
00:16:11,080 --> 00:16:13,640
Ho-ho-ho-ho!
317
00:16:22,320 --> 00:16:24,280
All right, Leonard?
318
00:16:24,320 --> 00:16:26,480
That's not my name.
319
00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:28,520
All right... Santa?
320
00:16:28,560 --> 00:16:31,160
Why don't you just come over here
321
00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:33,560
nice and slowly...?
Is he coming?
322
00:16:33,600 --> 00:16:37,800
That man needs to learn
the true meaning of Christmas.
323
00:16:37,840 --> 00:16:40,520
Oh, he just wants to teach you
the true meaning of Christmas.
324
00:16:40,560 --> 00:16:43,240
No, get back up there,
go and get him!
325
00:16:43,280 --> 00:16:46,240
OK, OK. Ah, ah...
326
00:16:51,120 --> 00:16:52,480
Ah...
327
00:16:52,520 --> 00:16:56,720
Well... unless
the true meaning of Christmas
328
00:16:56,760 --> 00:16:59,600
is that he's gonna
get his chimney blocked,
329
00:16:59,640 --> 00:17:01,800
I suggest...
330
00:17:01,840 --> 00:17:04,480
Oh, that's a big drop!
331
00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:09,520
It could... It could
make you feel a bit, a bit...
332
00:17:09,560 --> 00:17:12,200
Whoa!
PANTING
333
00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:14,160
Don't let go, Leonard!
334
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,640
That's not my name!
335
00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:17,800
Santa! Don't let go, Santa!
336
00:17:17,840 --> 00:17:19,600
I won't.
HE GRUNTS
337
00:17:19,640 --> 00:17:21,400
Oh, God.
338
00:17:21,440 --> 00:17:23,960
Oh, oh, oh...
Argh...
339
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:27,680
Whoops.
Oh, don't say whoops! Argh!
340
00:17:27,720 --> 00:17:28,880
Ah, ah, ah...
341
00:17:30,480 --> 00:17:32,840
Thanks, Doc. It wasn't me.
342
00:17:32,880 --> 00:17:36,520
It was just everything
started moving. I went dizzy.
343
00:17:36,560 --> 00:17:37,920
It's vertigo.
344
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:40,720
And you're drunk and a disgrace.
Come down.
345
00:17:40,760 --> 00:17:42,600
Merry Christmas, Doc!
346
00:17:47,360 --> 00:17:49,960
What on Earth were you thinking of?
Sorry, Doc.
347
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:53,080
I suppose I get a bit emotional
this time of the year.
348
00:17:53,120 --> 00:17:55,400
I had a few drinks.
349
00:17:55,440 --> 00:17:58,760
Normally don't touch the stuff.
A few drinks? You're drunk.
350
00:17:58,800 --> 00:18:00,200
It was only two.
351
00:18:00,240 --> 00:18:02,680
Really? Well, you must have
a very low tolerance for alcohol.
352
00:18:02,720 --> 00:18:04,280
I suggest you keep avoiding it.
353
00:18:04,320 --> 00:18:07,720
That was incredibly irresponsible.
The harm you could've done yourself
354
00:18:07,760 --> 00:18:09,920
or Penhale.
Not to mention my family.
355
00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:11,800
Lucky I was there to save you.
356
00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:14,520
Right, come on, I'll drive you home.
357
00:18:17,160 --> 00:18:19,560
At least your son got to see Santa.
358
00:18:19,600 --> 00:18:21,800
Yes, if he'd been really lucky,
he'd have seen Santa
359
00:18:21,840 --> 00:18:23,680
fall off the roof
and break his neck.
360
00:18:29,520 --> 00:18:30,600
James...
361
00:18:33,760 --> 00:18:34,960
HE SIGHS
362
00:18:53,240 --> 00:18:55,560
Look what Santa brought...
363
00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:09,840
Hello?
364
00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:12,000
Hello?
365
00:19:12,040 --> 00:19:18,520
DOG BARKS,
GROWLS
366
00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:20,040
DOG BARKS
367
00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:21,920
No! Ow!
368
00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:23,680
Out, out, OUT!
369
00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:26,120
Why is it in here?
I wonder what's wrong.
370
00:19:26,160 --> 00:19:29,040
It's a dog. That's what's wrong.
It's always barking.
371
00:19:29,080 --> 00:19:31,480
No, it's-it's not always barking.
372
00:19:31,520 --> 00:19:34,000
And it's never at this time
in the morning.
373
00:19:35,720 --> 00:19:37,040
BARKING CONTINUES
374
00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:38,640
Martin?
Yes.
375
00:19:38,680 --> 00:19:41,200
James has gone!
What? Where?
376
00:19:41,240 --> 00:19:44,800
I don't know, he's left this note.
It says he's gone to the North Pole.
377
00:19:44,840 --> 00:19:48,600
Oh, James is a smart, sensible boy,
he wouldn't do that.
378
00:19:48,640 --> 00:19:50,840
He's not in his room and
you're literally holding a note
379
00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:52,760
saying he's gone.
All right, I'll get dressed
380
00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:53,880
and we'll go and find him.
381
00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:56,080
Yeah, maybe he's just
hiding in the house somewhere.
382
00:19:56,120 --> 00:19:59,080
James, James!
Come on, hurry up. James!
383
00:19:59,120 --> 00:20:01,320
He's never done
anything like this before.
384
00:20:01,360 --> 00:20:03,320
I think it's cos
his head's been filled with
385
00:20:03,360 --> 00:20:05,080
all this Father Christmas stuff.
386
00:20:05,120 --> 00:20:08,160
Well, you're the one who practically
dragged Santa out the grotto,
387
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:09,920
then shouted at him yesterday.
388
00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:12,080
Well, he was on our roof!
389
00:20:12,120 --> 00:20:13,960
But James doesn't get that.
He just..
390
00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:17,240
He just sees you ruining Christmas.
I'm not ruining Christmas!
391
00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:19,920
Is it so bad that he might enjoy it?
392
00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:23,000
Even you must have some
happy memories of it as a child.
393
00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:24,960
No, I don't.
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
394
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:28,520
Well, isn't that a good reason
to make sure that James and Mary do?
395
00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:30,280
Ruth.
396
00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:32,720
Yes.
397
00:20:32,760 --> 00:20:34,200
We're on our way.
398
00:20:34,240 --> 00:20:35,960
She's got him.
She's giving him breakfast.
399
00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:38,720
Oh, thank goodness.
Right, but I'll pick him up.
400
00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:41,160
I'm sorry, Martin, it's just
that under the circumstances,
401
00:20:41,200 --> 00:20:43,960
I think it's better
that I go there alone.
402
00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:45,240
Right.
403
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:50,200
DOG BARKS
404
00:20:51,560 --> 00:20:52,640
Shut up.
405
00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:07,600
Oh, good morning, Doc.
Oh, you're all wet.
406
00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:09,360
I want to talk about yesterday.
407
00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:12,440
Oh, s... Oh, I'm so sorry.
I'm very sorry.
408
00:21:12,480 --> 00:21:17,560
Erm, I know it was unprofessional
and that you're probably very angry.
409
00:21:17,600 --> 00:21:21,480
Unless you're not... and you want
to suggest that we elope together,
410
00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:24,720
slipping away into the night...
No. No. No!
411
00:21:26,040 --> 00:21:28,560
When you forced your mouth
against mine yesterday,
412
00:21:28,600 --> 00:21:30,480
I noticed a strong acidic taste.
413
00:21:30,520 --> 00:21:33,320
And yesterday I saw you choke twice,
on two different occasions.
414
00:21:33,360 --> 00:21:35,000
Also, your voice is very hoarse.
415
00:21:35,040 --> 00:21:36,840
Well that's cos I've been
singing carols.
416
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:40,240
And I am sorry,
but I have to close for lunch.
417
00:21:40,280 --> 00:21:41,640
It's 8:15 in the morning.
418
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:45,080
Well, I'm... I'm not ill, Doctor.
419
00:21:45,120 --> 00:21:47,320
Do you get a sensation
like there's a lump in your throat
420
00:21:47,360 --> 00:21:49,520
when you swallow?
No.
421
00:21:49,560 --> 00:21:53,200
No, because that would be
very worrying if I thought that...
422
00:21:54,280 --> 00:21:55,800
Yes.
423
00:21:55,840 --> 00:21:58,040
You can read me like a book, Doctor.
424
00:21:58,080 --> 00:22:00,320
Hmm. Let me take a look.
425
00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:03,200
Ah, oh...
426
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:08,880
I first noticed it
a couple of weeks ago.
427
00:22:08,920 --> 00:22:11,720
And I feel something
every time I swallow.
428
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:16,080
{\an8}An enlarged lymph node.
I know what that means, Doctor.
429
00:22:16,120 --> 00:22:18,680
Stop talking. Open your mouth
and tilt your head back.
430
00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:20,120
Don't try to kiss me.
431
00:22:22,160 --> 00:22:23,440
Ahh!
Swallow.
432
00:22:23,480 --> 00:22:26,920
SHE GULPS
Yes. You have GORD.
433
00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:29,080
Gastroesophageal reflux disease.
434
00:22:29,120 --> 00:22:31,480
I'll prescribe Omeprazole,
but we should keep an eye on it.
435
00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:33,680
Chronic inflammation
of the oesophagus over time
436
00:22:33,720 --> 00:22:36,400
could lead to more serious
complications and damage.
437
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:41,200
What, so, basically...
438
00:22:41,240 --> 00:22:42,720
heartburn?
439
00:22:42,760 --> 00:22:44,520
Yes.
I'm not dying?
440
00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:46,880
No, not yet. Hold still.
441
00:22:50,880 --> 00:22:53,160
Mm. Normal movement.
442
00:22:53,200 --> 00:22:55,200
Your prolapsed disc
must have healed.
443
00:22:55,240 --> 00:22:57,040
You don't need to wear
the neck brace any more.
444
00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:59,800
Oh, I-I-I think
just to be on the safe side...
445
00:22:59,840 --> 00:23:01,760
There is no safe side.
You just don't need to.
446
00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:06,080
Maybe just pop it back on
for a few minutes. Not more, I-I...
447
00:23:06,120 --> 00:23:07,920
If you have an issue
with taking it off,
448
00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:10,440
then I can refer you to
a clinical psychologist if you like.
449
00:23:11,920 --> 00:23:15,080
No. There's no need for that.
450
00:23:15,120 --> 00:23:17,000
Consider it gone.
451
00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:21,840
And thank you, Doctor, for your
infinite patience and understanding.
452
00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:23,000
Yes.
453
00:23:44,120 --> 00:23:45,520
Medical supplies, please.
454
00:23:45,560 --> 00:23:47,040
Yes, Doctor.
455
00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:53,960
Thank you.
456
00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:01,240
I was just coming back
from the newsagents
457
00:24:01,280 --> 00:24:03,440
and I saw him
strolling down the street.
458
00:24:03,480 --> 00:24:05,840
I managed to persuade him
to have some breakfast
459
00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:09,280
before he continued his journey
to the North Pole.
460
00:24:09,320 --> 00:24:12,440
WEATHER REPORT ON TV:
'..freezing conditions, sub-zero.
461
00:24:12,480 --> 00:24:15,520
'And you can see there's
a strong band of low pressure...'
462
00:24:15,560 --> 00:24:17,400
What you did was very wrong, James.
463
00:24:17,440 --> 00:24:20,800
You can't just go walking off
like that.
464
00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:23,120
Mummy and Daddy were very worried.
465
00:24:23,160 --> 00:24:25,480
'..with a good chance of some snow
on the higher ground.
466
00:24:25,520 --> 00:24:27,680
'And that's gonna give some of us
in Cornwall...'
467
00:24:27,720 --> 00:24:28,840
It says it might snow.
468
00:24:28,880 --> 00:24:30,080
'..a white Christmas...'
469
00:24:30,120 --> 00:24:32,120
You won't need to go to
the North Pole now, will you?
470
00:24:32,160 --> 00:24:34,680
Doesn't matter. I hate Christmas!
471
00:24:34,720 --> 00:24:36,280
He's just like his father.
472
00:24:36,320 --> 00:24:38,200
Well, no. No, he's not, Ruth.
473
00:24:38,240 --> 00:24:41,080
Because, actually, Daddy's very much
looking forward to seeing Santa
474
00:24:41,120 --> 00:24:42,560
at the parade tonight as well.
475
00:24:42,600 --> 00:24:43,840
Really?
476
00:24:43,880 --> 00:24:45,320
Of course.
477
00:24:45,360 --> 00:24:48,360
So, why don't you go and clean up
your bowl and we'll get on home?
478
00:24:55,920 --> 00:24:58,560
SONG: 'Twelve Days Of Christmas'
479
00:25:05,520 --> 00:25:07,440
SHE SCREAMS,
CHICKENS CLUCK
480
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:08,800
FLAPPING
481
00:25:08,840 --> 00:25:10,320
SHE WHIMPERS
482
00:25:16,960 --> 00:25:18,360
'Be honest, Doc, how bad is it?'
483
00:25:18,400 --> 00:25:21,560
It's just a few minor scratches.
Oh, God.
484
00:25:21,600 --> 00:25:23,760
I've probably caught
all kinds of horrible diseases.
485
00:25:23,800 --> 00:25:26,200
Diseases from birds are usually
spread by inhaling the dust
486
00:25:26,240 --> 00:25:27,240
from their droppings.
487
00:25:27,280 --> 00:25:29,800
Worst a scratch'll do is give you
a mild superficial infection.
488
00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:31,760
Did you just say super-infection?
489
00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:33,560
No, I said superficial infection.
490
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:35,800
This is hardly the emergency
you said it was.
491
00:25:35,840 --> 00:25:37,960
Hello, hello, hell...! Oh.
492
00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:40,720
Oh, Doc, what are you doing here?
What's happened?
493
00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:43,280
Some psycho left birds in a box
to attack me.
494
00:25:43,320 --> 00:25:45,480
They didn't attack you.
They scratched you.
495
00:25:45,520 --> 00:25:46,600
The doc's right.
496
00:25:46,640 --> 00:25:49,240
Bit soon to be using
inflammatory language like psycho.
497
00:25:49,280 --> 00:25:52,520
Maybe someone
just wanted to give you a gift.
498
00:25:52,560 --> 00:25:55,560
What, a gift of three chickens?!
And then there's the note.
499
00:25:55,600 --> 00:25:58,640
"This is only the beginning."
That's a threat if ever I heard one.
500
00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:00,520
Bye.
Er, no. Wait up, Doc.
501
00:26:00,560 --> 00:26:03,840
Er, Louisa asked me to look after
the kids. I'll be safer there.
502
00:26:03,880 --> 00:26:05,240
Joe, deal with those.
503
00:26:05,280 --> 00:26:07,840
CHICKENS CLUCK
504
00:26:10,440 --> 00:26:13,840
Oh. Good morning!
Oh, hello, Agatha.
505
00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:17,160
I'm afraid the surgery isn't open
till after Christmas now.
506
00:26:17,200 --> 00:26:20,920
Oh, no, I've come to see you.
Official Parish Council business.
507
00:26:20,960 --> 00:26:22,960
Oh, right. OK.
508
00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:25,120
Of course. Erm...
509
00:26:25,160 --> 00:26:26,320
She does realise
510
00:26:26,360 --> 00:26:30,560
that that turkey is gonna end up
on someone's dinner table?
511
00:26:30,600 --> 00:26:33,840
Yeah, course she does.
Who's a good boy? Yeah, you are.
512
00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:35,800
You know, I've made
almost as much from selling
513
00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:37,240
guess-the-weight raffle tickets
514
00:26:37,280 --> 00:26:39,920
than I have had from selling food
these past few days.
515
00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:42,760
The great thing is, the chances
of someone actually guessing
516
00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:46,000
the weight of that bird
are close to zero. Oh, dear.
517
00:26:46,040 --> 00:26:49,200
It's a shame that Christmas comes
but once a year.
518
00:26:49,240 --> 00:26:51,360
Here we go. Pop it over there.
519
00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:56,320
I got some battery lanterns,
candle ones,
520
00:26:56,360 --> 00:26:58,520
and some of those fancy sky ones.
521
00:26:58,560 --> 00:27:01,040
Here, were they expensive?
522
00:27:01,080 --> 00:27:03,880
It doesn't matter, Bert.
It's Christmas.
523
00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:07,400
We're not gonna charge for them.
Oh, no, of course not.
524
00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:12,240
TURKEY CLUCKS,
GOBBLES
525
00:27:12,280 --> 00:27:16,040
Sorry, Agatha, we had a little bit
of an incident here today.
526
00:27:16,080 --> 00:27:18,440
Oh.
SHE CHUCKLES
527
00:27:18,480 --> 00:27:21,000
Would you like some tea?
Oh, no, thank you.
528
00:27:21,040 --> 00:27:23,480
I understand you're planning
a lantern parade this evening?
529
00:27:23,520 --> 00:27:25,520
Yes. Well, it's a bit last-minute,
530
00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:28,000
but it's all coming together,
touch wood.
531
00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:31,320
CHUCKLING:How wonderful.
Although, you know the rules.
532
00:27:31,360 --> 00:27:34,160
You haven't lodged your event
notification form with the council
533
00:27:34,200 --> 00:27:37,600
60 days prior to the event
and had it ratified.
534
00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:41,840
No. I thought as it's just a few
people walking down the street...
535
00:27:41,880 --> 00:27:44,360
Oh... A few people
walking down the street...
536
00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:48,840
It's a bit like saying a rock
concert is a few people in a field.
537
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:54,360
Agatha, James is really
looking forward to this.
538
00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:56,000
I know the village feels the same.
539
00:27:56,040 --> 00:27:59,520
And it really will just be
a few people with lanterns...
540
00:27:59,560 --> 00:28:01,680
Hi, guys.
541
00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:04,520
Martin, this is Agatha.
She's from the Parish Council.
542
00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:06,040
Doctor Ellingham.
Yes.
543
00:28:06,080 --> 00:28:07,800
Apologies if I look
a little flustered.
544
00:28:07,840 --> 00:28:10,000
I've just been attacked
by some birds.
545
00:28:10,040 --> 00:28:11,680
Oh, my.
It was nothing.
546
00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:13,880
Oh, sure!
"Lose one eye, get another."
547
00:28:13,920 --> 00:28:15,560
That must have been horrible.
548
00:28:15,600 --> 00:28:18,040
Those awful things
with their mean, little beaks
549
00:28:18,080 --> 00:28:19,440
and lifeless, black eyes.
550
00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:22,160
I know!
Thankfully, Janice survived.
551
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:25,000
I know she's really looking forward
to the parade as well.
552
00:28:25,040 --> 00:28:26,600
I'm not really that bothered...
553
00:28:26,640 --> 00:28:29,720
But, yes, very much so.
554
00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:32,200
Janice, can you check on Mary,
please?
555
00:28:32,240 --> 00:28:33,640
Yes.
556
00:28:37,840 --> 00:28:40,920
Is there any way we can get the
event signed off by this evening?
557
00:28:42,040 --> 00:28:43,720
This isn't about paperwork.
558
00:28:43,760 --> 00:28:45,920
This is about
the safety of the village
559
00:28:45,960 --> 00:28:48,680
during the most dangerous time
of the year.
560
00:28:48,720 --> 00:28:51,000
Well, I'm not sure
Christmas is that dangerous.
561
00:28:51,040 --> 00:28:52,680
Oh, really?
562
00:28:52,720 --> 00:28:56,000
Over-eating.
People drinking too much alcohol.
563
00:28:56,040 --> 00:28:57,920
Suppose there is
a little bit of that, yeah.
564
00:28:57,960 --> 00:29:00,200
Then there's injuries
from putting up decorations,
565
00:29:00,240 --> 00:29:04,160
injuries from taking them down,
candles, fires, indigestion,
566
00:29:04,200 --> 00:29:08,400
food poisoning, allergies, choking,
slipping on snow, slipping on ice...
567
00:29:08,440 --> 00:29:10,600
Have you ever seen
a Christmas tree catch alight?
568
00:29:10,640 --> 00:29:12,840
I don't know why people have them
in their homes.
569
00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:15,800
They're incendiary devices.
And don't forget batteries,
570
00:29:15,840 --> 00:29:17,560
which children seem to swallow
all day long
571
00:29:17,600 --> 00:29:18,880
during the Christmas holidays,
572
00:29:18,920 --> 00:29:20,560
leaking corrosive acid
into the stomach
573
00:29:20,600 --> 00:29:22,600
and destroying its lining.
They're quite lethal.
574
00:29:22,640 --> 00:29:25,600
I did forget them!
Thank you, doctor.
575
00:29:25,640 --> 00:29:27,800
Yes, thank you, Martin (!)
576
00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:30,840
You know, we've got a meeting now
about the parade.
577
00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:34,760
Why don't you come along and see
that there's nothing to worry about?
578
00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:37,000
I suppose I could.
Great.
579
00:29:37,040 --> 00:29:39,680
Martin, try and speak to James.
Make sure he's OK.
580
00:29:39,720 --> 00:29:41,120
Yes.
581
00:29:41,160 --> 00:29:43,840
Come along, we should get going.
Oh. Um...
582
00:29:43,880 --> 00:29:47,000
So, if nobody wins,
do we get to keep Toby?
583
00:29:47,040 --> 00:29:49,200
I don't know.
I hadn't really thought about it.
584
00:29:49,240 --> 00:29:51,160
Chances are
someone's guessed it correctly.
585
00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:54,040
Maybe. Maybe not.
586
00:29:54,080 --> 00:29:56,320
The plan is for people
to start at the school
587
00:29:56,360 --> 00:29:59,760
and make their way down here
to the Christmas tree at The Platt.
588
00:29:59,800 --> 00:30:02,760
That's relatively straight-forward.
Yeah, yeah, well, it is.
589
00:30:02,800 --> 00:30:05,160
So, we all set, Louisa?
Not quite.
590
00:30:05,200 --> 00:30:08,760
Apparently, we need permission
from Portwenn Parish Council.
591
00:30:08,800 --> 00:30:11,920
Erm, Agatha, you know Joe Penhale
and Bert Large, don't you?
592
00:30:11,960 --> 00:30:14,600
I am aware of them both, yes.
593
00:30:14,640 --> 00:30:17,840
What safety procedures
have you in play for the parade?
594
00:30:17,880 --> 00:30:23,960
Well... they're just walking
from up there to there, so...
595
00:30:24,000 --> 00:30:27,600
I thought I'd use the 1986
Public Order Act as my framework.
596
00:30:27,640 --> 00:30:31,160
Although, for me, the 1936 original
was far more effective.
597
00:30:31,200 --> 00:30:32,880
But then I'm just a police officer
598
00:30:32,920 --> 00:30:35,080
with the lowest crime rate
in Devon and Cornwall
599
00:30:35,120 --> 00:30:36,600
five years running,
so what do I know?
600
00:30:36,640 --> 00:30:38,040
That's true.
601
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:39,520
High-vis jackets?
602
00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:41,840
Please! I don't get out of bed
in the morning
603
00:30:41,880 --> 00:30:43,440
without a high-vis jacket on.
604
00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:45,080
LAUGHTER
605
00:30:45,120 --> 00:30:48,280
Have you got
a health and safety protocol?
606
00:30:48,320 --> 00:30:50,280
Er, no, not as such.
607
00:30:50,320 --> 00:30:54,240
But then, you know,
we-we only had a day and...
608
00:30:54,280 --> 00:30:56,080
Well, so what?
So what?!
609
00:30:56,120 --> 00:30:58,960
Yes. So what!
You know, the village needs this.
610
00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:02,760
To be able to come together
and celebrate as a community.
611
00:31:02,800 --> 00:31:05,040
The benefits surely
outweigh the risks.
612
00:31:05,080 --> 00:31:08,160
Agatha, you're the only person
that can make it happen.
613
00:31:08,200 --> 00:31:09,800
Or not.
614
00:31:11,040 --> 00:31:13,160
I suppose it's only a short walk.
615
00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:15,760
Great. So we're OK for tonight?
616
00:31:15,800 --> 00:31:18,400
TURKEY GOBBLES
Is that a turkey?
617
00:31:18,440 --> 00:31:22,480
Er, excuse me, why have you got
livestock next to a food truck?
618
00:31:22,520 --> 00:31:23,840
It's unhygienic.
619
00:31:23,880 --> 00:31:27,880
He's called Toby and he's not
unhygienic, he's very clean.
620
00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:30,280
I gave him a bath this morning.
And we're just weighing him
621
00:31:30,320 --> 00:31:32,320
to see if anyone's
won the competition.
622
00:31:32,360 --> 00:31:34,960
What competition?
Well, guess its weight correctly
623
00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:36,960
and it could end up on your table
this Christmas.
624
00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:38,720
Unfortunately, nobody got it right.
625
00:31:38,760 --> 00:31:40,880
Here, have a go. On the house.
626
00:31:40,920 --> 00:31:42,720
Oh, I don't know...
627
00:31:42,760 --> 00:31:44,680
Nine pounds, 11 ounces.
628
00:31:47,480 --> 00:31:49,640
That is amazing.
How did you do that?
629
00:31:49,680 --> 00:31:51,440
Wait, I won?!
630
00:31:51,480 --> 00:31:53,920
I don't like birds,
and definitely not that one.
631
00:31:53,960 --> 00:31:55,720
He's not asking you
to look after it.
632
00:31:55,760 --> 00:31:57,080
It's for Christmas lunch.
633
00:31:57,120 --> 00:31:59,040
Yeah, we'll get the butcher
to deliver it later.
634
00:31:59,080 --> 00:32:01,560
Or you could have the satisfaction
of knowing you were correct
635
00:32:01,600 --> 00:32:03,000
and leave it at that.
636
00:32:03,040 --> 00:32:06,480
Mor, it is a turkey, it's Christmas.
It's had a good, long life.
637
00:32:06,520 --> 00:32:09,640
Not that long. Christmas turkeys
are usually five months old.
638
00:32:09,680 --> 00:32:13,680
Well, we've all learned something
new today. So, the parade...
639
00:32:13,720 --> 00:32:16,560
So, the butcher will kill it
and chop it up for me?
640
00:32:16,600 --> 00:32:18,120
Yeah. All part of the prize.
641
00:32:18,160 --> 00:32:20,520
See what it's like
when a community comes together.
642
00:32:20,560 --> 00:32:22,040
AGATHA CHUCKLES
643
00:32:22,080 --> 00:32:24,240
He does seem like
a healthy specimen.
644
00:32:24,280 --> 00:32:26,760
TURKEY GOBBLES
Oh, my! Oh!
645
00:32:34,080 --> 00:32:35,800
Mr Maitland,
this is Doctor Ellingham.
646
00:32:35,840 --> 00:32:37,040
I have your test results.
647
00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:39,280
Can you please call me
as soon as you get this? Thank you.
648
00:32:39,320 --> 00:32:41,480
DOG BARKS
James...
649
00:32:41,520 --> 00:32:43,680
Can you ask your dog to be quiet,
please?
650
00:32:43,720 --> 00:32:45,040
DOG WHIMPERS
651
00:32:45,080 --> 00:32:46,240
James?
652
00:32:49,840 --> 00:32:51,320
James?!
653
00:32:54,560 --> 00:32:56,200
DOG BARKS
654
00:32:56,240 --> 00:32:57,640
Downstairs, shoo!
655
00:32:59,600 --> 00:33:01,080
Hello, James.
656
00:33:03,720 --> 00:33:04,960
You're upset with me.
657
00:33:08,160 --> 00:33:09,280
Mmm.
658
00:33:15,440 --> 00:33:19,440
When I was your age,
I'd wake up on Christmas morning...
659
00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:24,280
..and at the end of my bed,
every year,
660
00:33:24,320 --> 00:33:28,680
was a stocking with an orange
and a pencil set in it.
661
00:33:30,160 --> 00:33:32,560
And I'd run down to
my mother and father's room...
662
00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:36,000
..but...
663
00:33:36,040 --> 00:33:38,160
But what?
664
00:33:38,200 --> 00:33:40,560
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
665
00:33:40,600 --> 00:33:41,720
Excuse me.
666
00:33:42,920 --> 00:33:44,040
Yes.
667
00:33:45,520 --> 00:33:46,600
Right.
668
00:33:47,920 --> 00:33:49,760
Yes.
669
00:33:49,800 --> 00:33:52,040
Oh, I'm sorry, there's an emergency.
I have to go.
670
00:33:52,080 --> 00:33:54,840
Janice is downstairs
if you need anything.
671
00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:57,960
And we'll, erm...
Er, we'll talk again. Well done.
672
00:33:58,000 --> 00:33:59,600
Off, shoo, downstairs!
673
00:33:59,640 --> 00:34:02,120
DOG BARKS,
JAMES SIGHS
674
00:34:03,680 --> 00:34:06,120
OK, Agatha, I need you
to remain still, yeah?
675
00:34:06,160 --> 00:34:07,480
Just try not to move.
676
00:34:07,520 --> 00:34:09,240
SHOUTING: Out of the way,
coming through!
677
00:34:09,280 --> 00:34:12,440
You can probably hear somebody
barking at people. That's the doc.
678
00:34:12,480 --> 00:34:15,200
Er, she's had a fall. She's got
a cut on the back of her head.
679
00:34:15,240 --> 00:34:17,760
I've tried to stem the blood,
but I think she's concussed.
680
00:34:17,800 --> 00:34:19,400
Well done.
Anybody called an ambulance?
681
00:34:19,440 --> 00:34:20,800
On its way, Doc.
682
00:34:20,840 --> 00:34:23,280
Do you know where you are?
Turkey.
683
00:34:23,320 --> 00:34:26,040
I think she means the bird, Doc,
not the country.
684
00:34:26,080 --> 00:34:27,720
I won it from the food truck.
685
00:34:27,760 --> 00:34:29,400
Told you.
Yes, shush.
686
00:34:29,440 --> 00:34:31,360
I never won anything before!
687
00:34:31,400 --> 00:34:32,840
Keep still and stop talking.
688
00:34:34,680 --> 00:34:38,160
Sorry, I hate to do this,
but do we have the Parish go-ahead
689
00:34:38,200 --> 00:34:39,960
for the parade?
690
00:34:40,000 --> 00:34:42,320
Oh, Louisa, really?
Not now, come on.Sorry.
691
00:34:42,360 --> 00:34:44,080
SHE MUTTERS
692
00:34:45,640 --> 00:34:47,480
What did that mean?
693
00:34:47,520 --> 00:34:49,920
I'm pretty sure it was a yes.
694
00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:52,120
You're just saying that
cos you wanna be Santa Claus.
695
00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:56,480
Yes, I am.
Because you're right, Louisa.
696
00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:59,160
We deserve this. All of us.
697
00:34:59,200 --> 00:35:02,560
Do you really wanna tell James that
this has been cancelled as well?
698
00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:05,400
You're trying
to emotionally manipulate me.
699
00:35:05,440 --> 00:35:08,320
Is it working?
Might be, yeah.
700
00:35:08,360 --> 00:35:12,240
Because... technically,
Agatha didn't say no...
701
00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:15,120
Everyone! The parade's still on.
Joe, no, that's not what I meant...
702
00:35:15,160 --> 00:35:17,680
Right, let's get to work. Come on!
OK, then.
703
00:35:19,440 --> 00:35:22,080
Mor, what are you doing?
704
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:24,640
Oh, I-I thought I'd drive him
to the butcher's myself.
705
00:35:24,680 --> 00:35:26,360
Well, I-I can do that.
706
00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:28,080
Yeah, erm...
707
00:35:28,120 --> 00:35:30,000
I know it's silly, but I...
708
00:35:30,040 --> 00:35:32,160
I just want a chance to say goodbye.
709
00:35:32,200 --> 00:35:34,640
What, to the...?
710
00:35:34,680 --> 00:35:36,680
Right, OK. I understand.
711
00:35:36,720 --> 00:35:39,680
But, I mean, it is a...
It's a turkey at Christmas.
712
00:35:39,720 --> 00:35:40,800
Yeah, I know.
713
00:35:40,840 --> 00:35:42,960
Just take it easy. Rest up.
714
00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:44,960
Erm, avoid the bumpy roads.
Keep it smooth.
715
00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:46,920
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
Yes, Doc.
716
00:35:46,960 --> 00:35:49,200
We know how to drive an ambulance.
717
00:35:49,240 --> 00:35:50,400
Ellingham.
718
00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:54,640
Doc, it's Leonard Maitland.
You left a message?
719
00:35:54,680 --> 00:35:57,240
Ah, Mr Maitland, yes.
Your test results have come back.
720
00:35:57,280 --> 00:35:59,440
It's bad news, isn't it?
721
00:36:00,800 --> 00:36:03,760
To be honest, I've been
having dizzy spells all day.
722
00:36:03,800 --> 00:36:06,120
It's made working in the garage
really tricky.
723
00:36:06,160 --> 00:36:08,480
If you're feeling dizzy,
you shouldn't be up and about.
724
00:36:08,520 --> 00:36:09,960
Yeah, all right...
725
00:36:11,480 --> 00:36:13,640
'I'll go and get a seat.'
726
00:36:17,000 --> 00:36:18,920
CLATTERING
727
00:36:18,960 --> 00:36:20,600
Oh, oh...
728
00:36:21,760 --> 00:36:23,200
Mr Maitland? What's happened?
729
00:36:23,240 --> 00:36:27,480
Just fell over and took
the shelf down with me and...
730
00:36:27,520 --> 00:36:29,000
Oh, no.
731
00:36:34,600 --> 00:36:36,520
Doc, I don't wanna panic here,
732
00:36:36,560 --> 00:36:39,280
but there's a massive cut in my leg
and a lot of blood.
733
00:36:42,320 --> 00:36:45,800
I'll just try and patch myself up.
734
00:36:45,840 --> 00:36:47,560
'Bleeding everywhere here.'
735
00:36:47,600 --> 00:36:50,040
Right, put pressure on the wound
and keep the leg raised.
736
00:36:50,080 --> 00:36:51,200
I'll call an ambulance.
737
00:36:51,240 --> 00:36:52,960
Er, I'm sure it'll be fine.
738
00:36:53,000 --> 00:36:55,440
'Er, no. Your blood test showed
that you're grossly anaemic.
739
00:36:55,480 --> 00:36:57,160
'You can't afford
to lose any more blood.'
740
00:36:57,200 --> 00:36:59,560
It's not like as I could
bleed to death, is it?
741
00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:03,240
Ah, well, in a worst-case scenario,
er, yes. In a few hours.
742
00:37:03,280 --> 00:37:05,040
Then can you please
get off the phone
743
00:37:05,080 --> 00:37:06,680
and call me a bloody ambulance!
744
00:37:06,720 --> 00:37:08,040
Yes!
745
00:37:08,080 --> 00:37:10,680
TURKEY CLUCKS
746
00:37:10,720 --> 00:37:14,200
I don't want you to go,
but this is the only way.
747
00:37:16,680 --> 00:37:19,040
And I just wanna say thank you.
748
00:37:19,080 --> 00:37:21,720
I didn't think I was ready, but...
749
00:37:21,760 --> 00:37:24,360
I hadn't actually finished yet,
Toby.
750
00:37:25,560 --> 00:37:28,520
It's fine.
TURKEY CHATTERS
751
00:37:28,560 --> 00:37:30,280
Bye, then.
752
00:37:30,320 --> 00:37:32,160
TURKEY GOBBLES
753
00:37:35,640 --> 00:37:38,000
No, no fireworks.
And no sky lanterns.
754
00:37:38,040 --> 00:37:40,640
Hang on a minute! I can get
a really good deal on those.
755
00:37:40,680 --> 00:37:43,480
We don't wanna take anyone's
attention away from the parade.
756
00:37:43,520 --> 00:37:45,920
Louisa, excuse me.
Martin, I'm in a meeting.
757
00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:48,400
Yes, forgive me.
758
00:37:49,480 --> 00:37:50,600
Sorry.
759
00:37:50,640 --> 00:37:52,560
There's been an accident
at Leonard Maitland's
760
00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:54,840
and the only ambulance in the area
is tied up with, erm...
761
00:37:54,880 --> 00:37:57,520
er, whatshername, so I'm gonna
have to drive up there myself.
762
00:37:57,560 --> 00:38:00,080
Oh, dear, that sounds serious.
Yes, it is.
763
00:38:00,120 --> 00:38:02,120
Will you be back
in time for the parade?
764
00:38:02,160 --> 00:38:04,080
Erm, yes, I should be.
765
00:38:04,120 --> 00:38:06,320
Er, but if I'm not...
you'll tell James, will you?
766
00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:08,760
It'll be fine. He's fine. Just go.
767
00:38:25,760 --> 00:38:27,760
All OK with the butcher?
768
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:30,680
You're not gonna believe me.
Toby escaped.
769
00:38:30,720 --> 00:38:31,880
What?
770
00:38:31,920 --> 00:38:35,080
Yeah, so I got to the butcher
and then he just sprung out the cage
771
00:38:35,120 --> 00:38:36,440
and flew away.
772
00:38:36,480 --> 00:38:38,880
You're right, I don't believe you.
773
00:38:38,920 --> 00:38:40,720
SCREAMING
Is that Janice?
774
00:38:40,760 --> 00:38:42,520
God.
775
00:38:42,560 --> 00:38:43,920
Come on!
776
00:38:50,640 --> 00:38:52,080
What is it?
777
00:38:52,120 --> 00:38:54,280
Oh, that's really nice.
778
00:38:54,320 --> 00:38:55,440
Nice?
779
00:38:55,480 --> 00:38:57,640
Someone breaks in
and leaves more birds for me
780
00:38:57,680 --> 00:38:59,600
after the last lot
almost blinded me?
781
00:38:59,640 --> 00:39:03,080
It was a tiny scratch. On your hand.
782
00:39:03,120 --> 00:39:05,280
Maybe you should speak to Joe.
783
00:39:05,320 --> 00:39:07,720
I already have. But you know
what the police are like.
784
00:39:07,760 --> 00:39:10,080
They've always got
more important things to do.
785
00:39:10,120 --> 00:39:13,360
It's just that doves are a symbol,
aren't they, of, er, of love?
786
00:39:13,400 --> 00:39:14,600
So?
787
00:39:14,640 --> 00:39:16,400
So maybe speak to Joe.
788
00:39:16,440 --> 00:39:19,440
Uh, I just told you, I already have.
789
00:39:19,480 --> 00:39:20,760
Is he feeling OK?
790
00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:22,280
SCREAMING
791
00:39:22,320 --> 00:39:24,480
PHONE RINGING OUT
792
00:39:28,440 --> 00:39:29,680
Mr Maitland?
793
00:39:31,760 --> 00:39:33,680
Can you hear me?
794
00:39:33,720 --> 00:39:35,280
Mr Maitland?
795
00:39:36,640 --> 00:39:39,560
If you can hear me,
I'm almost with you.
796
00:39:39,600 --> 00:39:41,560
TURKEY CLUCKS
797
00:39:54,720 --> 00:39:57,480
TURKEY CHATTERS
798
00:40:03,080 --> 00:40:05,200
WIND WHISTLES
799
00:40:07,080 --> 00:40:09,080
HE GROANS
800
00:40:16,800 --> 00:40:18,440
HE MUTTERS
801
00:40:26,040 --> 00:40:29,120
RAGGED BREATHING,
WIND WHISTLES
802
00:40:29,160 --> 00:40:32,040
ENGINE HISSES
803
00:40:34,080 --> 00:40:35,800
HE GROANS
804
00:40:58,360 --> 00:40:59,880
HE YELPS
805
00:40:59,920 --> 00:41:02,040
Argh!
806
00:41:06,000 --> 00:41:08,440
I was just coming to find you.
How's your day been?
807
00:41:08,480 --> 00:41:10,240
Terrible.
Really?
808
00:41:10,280 --> 00:41:12,440
What, nothing special happened
or...?
809
00:41:12,480 --> 00:41:15,520
Oh, something special happened.
That psycho struck again.
810
00:41:15,560 --> 00:41:17,400
He left two more scary birds
in the salon.
811
00:41:17,440 --> 00:41:20,280
OK. What type of birds?
812
00:41:20,320 --> 00:41:21,960
I don't know, doves or something.
813
00:41:22,000 --> 00:41:23,680
Well, doves are nice.
814
00:41:23,720 --> 00:41:26,680
Doves, pigeons, rats, bats -
they're all the same.
815
00:41:26,720 --> 00:41:28,880
When I find out who did this,
they're dead.
816
00:41:28,920 --> 00:41:31,640
Well, maybe if you just
think about it...
817
00:41:31,680 --> 00:41:34,080
I am thinking about it!
I can't stop, it's driving me nuts.
818
00:41:34,120 --> 00:41:37,080
Look, if you can't be bothered
to find out who's stalking me,
819
00:41:37,120 --> 00:41:39,000
then at least
go and get rid of them!
820
00:41:39,040 --> 00:41:41,240
Yeah. I promise.
I'll-I'll sort it out.
821
00:41:44,760 --> 00:41:49,160
Ho-ho-ho!
What do you want for Christmas?
822
00:41:49,200 --> 00:41:51,360
How far away
is Leonard Maitland's house?
823
00:41:51,400 --> 00:41:55,160
You do realise I'm Santa Claus,
not the wonderful Joseph Penh...
824
00:41:55,200 --> 00:41:56,760
It's about 20 minutes.
825
00:41:56,800 --> 00:41:59,080
It's just Martin drove up there
a few hours ago.
826
00:41:59,120 --> 00:42:01,280
He's still not back
and I can't get a hold of him.
827
00:42:01,320 --> 00:42:03,680
Well, signal's terrible up there.
The important thing...
828
00:42:03,720 --> 00:42:05,200
Is not to worry. Yes, I know.
829
00:42:05,240 --> 00:42:07,880
The important thing
is that Leonard can't play Santa
830
00:42:07,920 --> 00:42:09,360
because that's my job now.
831
00:42:09,400 --> 00:42:12,720
And, yes, also not to worry.
832
00:42:12,760 --> 00:42:17,120
TURKEY CHATTERS,
WIND WHISTLES
833
00:43:06,200 --> 00:43:10,920
ENGINE SPLUTTERS
THEN CUTS OUT
834
00:43:13,880 --> 00:43:15,400
RAGGED BREATHING
835
00:43:15,440 --> 00:43:17,320
You always were a fragile child.
836
00:43:19,200 --> 00:43:21,800
I'm not one to be critical,
but it was rather embarrassing.
837
00:43:23,320 --> 00:43:24,480
SHAKILY: Hypothermia.
838
00:43:24,520 --> 00:43:26,120
Hmm?
839
00:43:28,200 --> 00:43:30,560
Oh, I've been out in the cold
for nearly two hours
840
00:43:30,600 --> 00:43:33,040
and my body temperature's dropped.
841
00:43:33,080 --> 00:43:34,360
And my pulse rate's decreased.
842
00:43:34,400 --> 00:43:37,200
And my pupils are dilated.
843
00:43:37,240 --> 00:43:40,120
My reflexes seem unaffected, though.
844
00:43:40,160 --> 00:43:42,040
Oh, for goodness' sake.
845
00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:43,800
Can't you even say hello?
846
00:43:43,840 --> 00:43:47,080
Erm.. You're not a person.
You're a symptom.
847
00:43:47,120 --> 00:43:48,560
SHE SCOFFS
848
00:43:48,600 --> 00:43:50,480
That's a dreadful thing to say
to your mother.
849
00:43:50,520 --> 00:43:54,720
Hypothermia can lead to
disorientation and hallucinations.
850
00:43:54,760 --> 00:43:59,160
You always have an excuse for
everything. It's rather tiresome.
851
00:43:59,200 --> 00:44:03,040
Right now, my primary concern
is to get the engine started
852
00:44:03,080 --> 00:44:05,200
and the heat on again.
853
00:44:05,240 --> 00:44:08,040
And if you don't manage that?
854
00:44:08,080 --> 00:44:11,640
My core temperature
could drop to a level
855
00:44:11,680 --> 00:44:14,960
where it's unable
to produce sufficient heat,
856
00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:20,240
which ultimately would lead to
my vital organs failing and then...
857
00:44:20,280 --> 00:44:21,440
Death?
858
00:44:22,960 --> 00:44:23,960
Yes.
859
00:44:24,000 --> 00:44:25,960
How long do you have?
860
00:44:27,480 --> 00:44:29,240
About an hour.
861
00:44:30,440 --> 00:44:31,760
Maybe less.
862
00:44:33,000 --> 00:44:34,200
That's not helpful.
863
00:44:34,240 --> 00:44:38,160
Oh, Martin! What makes you think
I'm here to help?
864
00:44:38,200 --> 00:44:40,000
WIND WHISTLES
865
00:44:47,560 --> 00:44:50,720
Do you think he'll be upset
if you don't make it home?
866
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:52,080
Who?
867
00:44:52,120 --> 00:44:53,760
James.
868
00:44:53,800 --> 00:44:55,720
I will make it back.
869
00:44:55,760 --> 00:44:58,480
You don't seem that upset
about my passing.
870
00:44:58,520 --> 00:45:01,680
And it's not as if you're
a better parent to James.
871
00:45:01,720 --> 00:45:03,160
That's not true.
872
00:45:03,200 --> 00:45:06,720
He's already begun to resent you,
Martin.
873
00:45:06,760 --> 00:45:08,880
That's a disease that spreads.
874
00:45:08,920 --> 00:45:11,920
One that I doubt
even you know how to cure.
875
00:45:14,320 --> 00:45:17,200
How old were you when you realised
we didn't love you?
876
00:45:19,040 --> 00:45:20,720
Look what Santa brought.
877
00:45:20,760 --> 00:45:23,560
'Was it on one of those
Christmas Day mornings,
878
00:45:23,600 --> 00:45:26,560
'when you woke up and found us gone?
879
00:45:28,240 --> 00:45:30,200
'You can't blame us, Martin.
880
00:45:31,440 --> 00:45:34,800
'We were happy before you arrived.'
881
00:45:34,840 --> 00:45:36,120
Hello?
882
00:45:38,440 --> 00:45:41,160
We just wanted to enjoy
one special day a year,
883
00:45:41,200 --> 00:45:44,000
when we could be free from you.
884
00:45:44,040 --> 00:45:46,520
Be quiet. You're not real.
885
00:45:46,560 --> 00:45:49,840
Which, on the balance of things,
is even more disturbing, isn't it?
886
00:45:49,880 --> 00:45:52,000
ENGINE STARTS
887
00:45:53,440 --> 00:45:55,240
What a clever boy.
888
00:45:55,280 --> 00:45:56,440
CAR BEEPS,
ENGINE STOPS
889
00:45:58,040 --> 00:45:59,080
Well, maybe not.
890
00:46:01,880 --> 00:46:03,720
What are you doing?
891
00:46:03,760 --> 00:46:07,480
My patient is anaemic.
I have to make sure that he's safe.
892
00:46:07,520 --> 00:46:10,800
You can't go out there.
You've already tried and failed.
893
00:46:10,840 --> 00:46:12,400
Then I'll try again.
894
00:46:12,440 --> 00:46:13,840
And you'll freeze to death.
895
00:46:13,880 --> 00:46:17,680
Now, sit back here
and listen with Mother.
896
00:46:17,720 --> 00:46:21,160
Just for the record...
I forgive you.
897
00:46:21,200 --> 00:46:23,600
No, you don't.
Oh, shut up!
898
00:46:40,200 --> 00:46:41,680
You ready to go to the parade?
899
00:46:41,720 --> 00:46:43,400
Just fixing my beard.
900
00:46:43,440 --> 00:46:44,880
HE CHUCKLES
901
00:46:46,440 --> 00:46:48,040
Do I look OK?
902
00:46:48,080 --> 00:46:49,880
I don't know. I suppose so.
903
00:46:49,920 --> 00:46:52,560
I'm sorry.
It's this whole stalker thing.
904
00:46:52,600 --> 00:46:53,920
It's got me all anxious.
905
00:46:53,960 --> 00:46:56,320
It's over, Janice.
906
00:46:56,360 --> 00:46:58,080
You just have to trust me.
907
00:46:58,120 --> 00:46:59,720
It's all over.
908
00:47:03,120 --> 00:47:06,400
Right, I couldn't get you
a partridge.
909
00:47:06,440 --> 00:47:09,120
What I have got you is a pheasant,
which is basically
910
00:47:09,160 --> 00:47:11,280
the Rolls Royce of partridges.
911
00:47:12,480 --> 00:47:13,640
Did you not get my message?
912
00:47:13,680 --> 00:47:17,280
Yeah. No more birds to the salon.
So I've, er, brought it here.
913
00:47:17,320 --> 00:47:18,960
Just "no more birds".
914
00:47:19,000 --> 00:47:21,680
Well, you've paid for them and
you're not getting your money back.
915
00:47:24,880 --> 00:47:26,680
Oh, my God.
916
00:47:26,720 --> 00:47:28,200
You're my stalker.
917
00:47:29,800 --> 00:47:32,680
What's wrong with you? Why would you
want to torture me like this?
918
00:47:32,720 --> 00:47:34,480
It was meant to be romantic.
919
00:47:34,520 --> 00:47:36,840
What's romantic about
being attacked by chickens?
920
00:47:36,880 --> 00:47:38,680
Not chickens. Hens.
921
00:47:38,720 --> 00:47:43,360
Three Cornish hens
because no-one had any French ones.
922
00:47:43,400 --> 00:47:46,560
And then two doves
and then a pheasant.
923
00:47:46,600 --> 00:47:50,120
Because, apparently, they're
the Rolls Royce of partridges.
924
00:47:51,400 --> 00:47:54,040
You know, like the song.
925
00:47:55,080 --> 00:47:57,360
Well, then, why didn't you just
tell me, then?
926
00:47:58,560 --> 00:48:01,240
Because you were upset and...
927
00:48:02,880 --> 00:48:05,640
..I didn't want to spoil this...
928
00:48:07,600 --> 00:48:08,960
..this moment.
929
00:48:12,000 --> 00:48:13,960
Oh.
930
00:48:14,000 --> 00:48:18,920
I know we've tried and failed
before, Janice, but...
931
00:48:20,760 --> 00:48:22,000
..I love you.
932
00:48:25,800 --> 00:48:27,440
Joe, I can't.
933
00:48:29,360 --> 00:48:31,040
Oh. OK.
934
00:48:31,080 --> 00:48:33,680
OK. That's fine.
935
00:48:33,720 --> 00:48:37,360
I mean the beard. It has to go.
936
00:48:40,920 --> 00:48:42,400
So...?
937
00:48:42,440 --> 00:48:43,600
Yes!
938
00:48:48,880 --> 00:48:51,000
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
939
00:48:52,600 --> 00:48:53,960
Hello?
940
00:48:54,000 --> 00:48:56,640
Martin, thank goodness.
I was so worried.
941
00:48:56,680 --> 00:48:58,640
BREATHLESSLY: 'I crashed the car.'
942
00:48:58,680 --> 00:49:00,000
Oh, my God. Are you OK?
943
00:49:00,040 --> 00:49:02,000
Er, wait a minute.
944
00:49:02,040 --> 00:49:04,760
Hello?
'I'm here, Martin.'
945
00:49:04,800 --> 00:49:07,040
I think I have hypothermia.
946
00:49:07,080 --> 00:49:08,880
My, er... my mother...
947
00:49:08,920 --> 00:49:11,160
Oh, Martin, I know. I'm so sorry.
948
00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:12,960
No, she came to visit me.
949
00:49:14,280 --> 00:49:16,200
What? What do you mean?
Like, as a ghost?
950
00:49:16,240 --> 00:49:19,760
No, it was a symptom of hypothermia.
951
00:49:19,800 --> 00:49:21,200
She said...
952
00:49:21,240 --> 00:49:23,360
She said I was losing James.
953
00:49:23,400 --> 00:49:25,000
She wasn't real, though.
954
00:49:25,040 --> 00:49:29,280
I know. But it doesn't mean
she wasn't right, though, does it?
955
00:49:29,320 --> 00:49:30,720
Martin, where are you now?
956
00:49:32,320 --> 00:49:35,400
Well, the car wouldn't start
and my mother was being annoying,
957
00:49:35,440 --> 00:49:37,400
so I was trying to find
Leonard Maitland's house,
958
00:49:37,440 --> 00:49:38,800
but I think I'm lost.
959
00:49:38,840 --> 00:49:42,680
OK. You need to go back to the car,
yeah, and I'll come and find you.
960
00:49:42,720 --> 00:49:44,840
I'm not entirely sure where I am...
961
00:49:44,880 --> 00:49:47,680
and I-I don't know where the car is.
962
00:49:49,200 --> 00:49:52,200
'Martin? Martin, I can't hear you.'
963
00:49:52,240 --> 00:49:54,040
I can see light.
964
00:49:54,080 --> 00:49:57,600
No, no, no, that doesn't sound good.
Don't go into the light, Martin.
965
00:49:57,640 --> 00:49:59,840
I think it's Leonard Maitland's
house.
966
00:49:59,880 --> 00:50:02,280
All right, in that case,
definitely go towards it
967
00:50:02,320 --> 00:50:03,960
and I'll come collect you now.
968
00:50:04,000 --> 00:50:06,160
No. He needs urgent
medical attention.
969
00:50:06,200 --> 00:50:07,480
That's why I'm here.
970
00:50:07,520 --> 00:50:10,320
Martin, you were just in a crash
and you said you had hypothermia.
971
00:50:10,360 --> 00:50:12,600
I just need to warm up.
972
00:50:12,640 --> 00:50:14,040
I'll be fine.
973
00:50:14,080 --> 00:50:15,840
Really, you're sure?
974
00:50:15,880 --> 00:50:18,800
Yeah. You can come and get me
after the parade.
975
00:50:18,840 --> 00:50:21,320
'Right, just, please,
just stay in touch.'
976
00:50:21,360 --> 00:50:23,200
DISCONNECTED TONE
977
00:50:41,280 --> 00:50:42,720
Hold on!
978
00:50:46,520 --> 00:50:49,080
Bloody hell, what happened to you?
Come in.
979
00:50:49,120 --> 00:50:51,280
You shouldn't be walking around.
980
00:50:51,320 --> 00:50:53,480
I had to answer the door, didn't I?
981
00:50:58,160 --> 00:51:00,160
Lie down there and elevate your leg.
982
00:51:06,720 --> 00:51:08,320
You look awful, Doc.
983
00:51:09,800 --> 00:51:12,000
My car came off the road.
984
00:51:12,040 --> 00:51:13,760
I just need to warm up for a bit.
985
00:51:15,400 --> 00:51:17,520
I would make you a hot drink, but...
986
00:51:17,560 --> 00:51:19,320
feel free to help yourself.
987
00:51:19,360 --> 00:51:20,800
Thank you.
988
00:51:22,600 --> 00:51:25,200
I'm a bit worried about
your blood loss, though.
989
00:51:25,240 --> 00:51:26,840
Let me take your pulse.
990
00:51:31,240 --> 00:51:34,160
Yeah, you don't have a radial pulse.
991
00:51:34,200 --> 00:51:36,360
I'll set up a drip
and get some fluids into you,
992
00:51:36,400 --> 00:51:38,720
but first
I'll have a look at that wound.
993
00:51:38,760 --> 00:51:41,600
Sorry to drag you up here, Doc.
994
00:51:41,640 --> 00:51:45,000
It's Christmas Eve.
You should be with your family.
995
00:51:45,040 --> 00:51:46,320
Stop talking.
996
00:51:50,720 --> 00:51:52,480
HE RETCHES
997
00:51:52,520 --> 00:51:54,640
It's bad, right?
998
00:51:55,640 --> 00:51:58,440
Yes, you've, er,
torn a varicose vein.
999
00:51:58,480 --> 00:52:00,360
That's why you're bleeding so much.
1000
00:52:02,160 --> 00:52:03,520
HE GASPS
1001
00:52:06,600 --> 00:52:09,280
Well, yeah, luckily, he's OK,
but it could've been a lot worse.
1002
00:52:09,320 --> 00:52:11,200
Well, that's a relief.
1003
00:52:11,240 --> 00:52:14,200
And don't worry about Mary.
I'm more than happy
1004
00:52:14,240 --> 00:52:16,520
to look after her
while you're at the parade.
1005
00:52:16,560 --> 00:52:17,960
Oh, that's wonderful.
1006
00:52:18,000 --> 00:52:21,160
Oh, hello.
I didn't realise you were here.
1007
00:52:21,200 --> 00:52:23,120
Sal dropped in
for some of my eggnog.
1008
00:52:23,160 --> 00:52:26,560
I don't know if the doctor told you?
He did.
1009
00:52:26,600 --> 00:52:28,200
Oh.
1010
00:52:28,240 --> 00:52:29,880
Sorry.
1011
00:52:29,920 --> 00:52:32,240
Why, what happened?
1012
00:52:32,280 --> 00:52:34,440
Oh, it's nothing. Thank you, Ruth.
1013
00:52:34,480 --> 00:52:36,440
Come on, James. It's almost time.
1014
00:52:36,480 --> 00:52:38,640
I'm going to see Santa.
1015
00:52:38,680 --> 00:52:41,240
Well, tell him I said hello.
1016
00:52:41,280 --> 00:52:42,680
Bye.
1017
00:52:47,040 --> 00:52:48,440
I don't want to pry...
1018
00:52:48,480 --> 00:52:52,000
I may have accidentally tried
to kiss the doctor earlier.
1019
00:52:52,040 --> 00:52:53,680
Oh, Sally.
1020
00:52:53,720 --> 00:52:55,680
Well, there was mistletoe.
1021
00:52:55,720 --> 00:52:57,360
And he'd just helped me.
1022
00:52:57,400 --> 00:53:01,800
I had what I thought was
a malignant lump in my throat
1023
00:53:01,840 --> 00:53:06,760
and it turned out to be
gastroesophageal reflux disease.
1024
00:53:06,800 --> 00:53:10,680
Well, usually, a handshake
or "thank you very much" will do.
1025
00:53:10,720 --> 00:53:12,400
And he also...
1026
00:53:12,440 --> 00:53:14,960
He said that my prolapsed disc
was healed
1027
00:53:15,000 --> 00:53:17,720
and I don't need to wear
my neck brace any more.
1028
00:53:17,760 --> 00:53:20,000
But I don't know. I just...
1029
00:53:20,040 --> 00:53:22,640
I can't seem to take it off.
1030
00:53:22,680 --> 00:53:25,000
Would you like me to do it?
1031
00:53:31,800 --> 00:53:32,840
Sorry.
1032
00:53:32,880 --> 00:53:34,400
Oh, er...
1033
00:53:34,440 --> 00:53:36,560
Oh-oh-oh, sorry...
1034
00:53:36,600 --> 00:53:39,520
I-I know it's stupid
and it's sentimental,
1035
00:53:39,560 --> 00:53:40,880
but, erm...
1036
00:53:43,080 --> 00:53:44,760
..I will miss it.
1037
00:53:46,400 --> 00:53:49,200
It's a permanent symbol
of a medical condition,
1038
00:53:49,240 --> 00:53:53,480
which means it's also
a permanent link to a certain doctor
1039
00:53:53,520 --> 00:53:55,640
you may have feelings for.
1040
00:53:56,960 --> 00:53:59,160
It's not the neck brace
you're giving up...
1041
00:54:00,560 --> 00:54:02,440
..it's Martin.
1042
00:54:14,120 --> 00:54:15,120
Do it.
1043
00:54:17,040 --> 00:54:19,280
Good girl.
Yeah.
1044
00:54:19,320 --> 00:54:21,880
I, no-no...
Stay still.
1045
00:54:21,920 --> 00:54:24,080
I-I-I... Oh, oh...
There.
1046
00:54:42,360 --> 00:54:45,960
You're right, it's time.
1047
00:54:47,880 --> 00:54:49,360
Yeah.
1048
00:54:57,200 --> 00:54:59,040
So, you need to rest up.
1049
00:54:59,080 --> 00:55:03,080
No strenuous activity
for at least two weeks.
1050
00:55:03,120 --> 00:55:05,440
No more Santa, then.
No.
1051
00:55:07,440 --> 00:55:10,040
Have you worked out
what this rash is yet?
1052
00:55:10,080 --> 00:55:12,520
Er, no, I haven't had
the results back from your biopsy,
1053
00:55:12,560 --> 00:55:15,440
but I'm fairly certain
that it's dermatitis herpetiformis.
1054
00:55:15,480 --> 00:55:18,440
Is it catching?
No.
1055
00:55:18,480 --> 00:55:20,680
So there was no need
to close the grotto down.
1056
00:55:20,720 --> 00:55:23,320
No, no, precautions were necessary.
1057
00:55:23,360 --> 00:55:26,080
Anyway, I think it was just
a symptom of something bigger.
1058
00:55:26,120 --> 00:55:29,480
All indicators point towards
coeliac disease,
1059
00:55:29,520 --> 00:55:31,800
which is a condition
where your immune system
1060
00:55:31,840 --> 00:55:35,040
starts to attack your own tissue
when you eat gluten.
1061
00:55:35,080 --> 00:55:39,080
It would certainly explain
your low blood iron
1062
00:55:39,120 --> 00:55:41,720
and your stomach issues
and your weight loss.
1063
00:55:41,760 --> 00:55:44,640
And your stronger than normal
reaction to wheat-based alcohol.
1064
00:55:44,680 --> 00:55:47,880
My body's attacking itself?
Bloody heck, that sounds serious.
1065
00:55:47,920 --> 00:55:50,720
Yeah, it is. Yeah. Yeah.
Unless you change your diet,
1066
00:55:50,760 --> 00:55:53,160
you run the risk of malabsorption
and malnutrition.
1067
00:55:53,200 --> 00:55:55,600
It can be very serious.
I'll run some tests.
1068
00:55:55,640 --> 00:55:57,080
Urgent tests?
1069
00:55:57,120 --> 00:55:58,680
Not this minute, no.
1070
00:55:58,720 --> 00:56:01,480
Great, so I can drive you
back to the village now,
1071
00:56:01,520 --> 00:56:03,120
seeing as I'm not contagious.
1072
00:56:03,160 --> 00:56:04,440
Ah, no, that won't be necessary.
1073
00:56:04,480 --> 00:56:06,480
Louisa's coming to collect me
after the parade.
1074
00:56:06,520 --> 00:56:08,320
After the parade?
1075
00:56:08,360 --> 00:56:10,720
Doc, it's Christmas Eve.
1076
00:56:10,760 --> 00:56:13,480
I'm more than grateful,
you risking yourself,
1077
00:56:13,520 --> 00:56:16,560
coming up here and stitching me up,
but you should be with your family.
1078
00:56:16,600 --> 00:56:18,880
Yes, now I appreciate that,
but I need to be thorough.
1079
00:56:21,840 --> 00:56:23,280
Doc...
1080
00:56:23,320 --> 00:56:25,560
I hate Christmas. I always have.
1081
00:56:25,600 --> 00:56:27,800
What do you mean?
1082
00:56:27,840 --> 00:56:30,040
See, my wife loved it.
1083
00:56:30,080 --> 00:56:32,400
I was only ever Santa to please her.
1084
00:56:32,440 --> 00:56:35,320
And to be honest,
I still couldn't stand it.
1085
00:56:35,360 --> 00:56:38,480
I'd moan, complain,
you know how it is.
1086
00:56:39,800 --> 00:56:45,200
Then, five years ago, she died.
December the 23rd, without warning.
1087
00:56:45,240 --> 00:56:48,200
Yes, I remember, it was very sad.
1088
00:56:48,240 --> 00:56:51,600
After that,
putting on the beard, the suit,
1089
00:56:51,640 --> 00:56:54,520
becoming someone else for a while,
well, it was an escape.
1090
00:56:57,560 --> 00:57:01,480
And once I stopped fighting it,
I started to get it.
1091
00:57:01,520 --> 00:57:05,440
Making toys for the kids,
giving folk some happy memories...
1092
00:57:05,480 --> 00:57:10,040
it's... it's a privilege, Doc.
An honour.
1093
00:57:10,080 --> 00:57:13,560
I just wish I'd understood that
when she was still alive.
1094
00:57:15,840 --> 00:57:19,880
Yes, well, erm... I'm sorry, you'll
have to wait until next year now.
1095
00:57:19,920 --> 00:57:22,520
And is that your plan?
1096
00:57:22,560 --> 00:57:24,280
Wait until next year
1097
00:57:24,320 --> 00:57:27,080
and MAYBE celebrate Christmas
with your family then?
1098
00:57:27,120 --> 00:57:29,240
I had an emergency to attend to.
1099
00:57:29,280 --> 00:57:30,840
And now the emergency's over.
1100
00:57:30,880 --> 00:57:32,200
Er, yeah, well, even if I...
1101
00:57:32,240 --> 00:57:34,920
Even if I... I mean, it's just...
It'll be just too late now.
1102
00:57:34,960 --> 00:57:36,760
It wouldn't be too late
if you left right now.
1103
00:57:36,800 --> 00:57:38,800
I still have to run those tests
on you.
1104
00:57:38,840 --> 00:57:40,280
The tests can wait.
1105
00:57:43,240 --> 00:57:44,640
You're avoiding your family
1106
00:57:44,680 --> 00:57:47,200
because you don't want
to ruin things for them.
1107
00:57:50,880 --> 00:57:53,920
Do you wanna know what
the true magic of Christmas is?
1108
00:57:53,960 --> 00:57:55,720
It's being exactly who you are,
1109
00:57:55,760 --> 00:57:57,960
but, still,
your family want you around,
1110
00:57:58,000 --> 00:58:00,360
even if you are
an irritating bugger.
1111
00:58:01,840 --> 00:58:03,640
That truly is a miracle.
1112
00:58:05,360 --> 00:58:08,520
And sometimes we don't know how
lucky we are until it's too late.
1113
00:58:12,560 --> 00:58:15,840
The only way you can ruin their
Christmas is by not being there.
1114
00:58:18,320 --> 00:58:21,120
Yes, I see what you mean.
1115
00:58:21,160 --> 00:58:23,440
Great. Now,
it's gonna be cold out there,
1116
00:58:23,480 --> 00:58:24,840
so we'll need to wrap up.
1117
00:58:24,880 --> 00:58:27,480
You're not coming. You need
to recuperate and rest that leg.
1118
00:58:27,520 --> 00:58:29,680
Doc, it's Christmas Eve.
I have plans.
1119
00:58:29,720 --> 00:58:32,280
Absolutely not.
I'm the one with the wheels.
1120
00:58:32,320 --> 00:58:35,440
Either we go together,
or we don't go at all.
1121
00:58:46,960 --> 00:58:49,120
Here we go. I've got some spares.
1122
00:58:50,280 --> 00:58:52,000
As I was saying, it'll be cold,
1123
00:58:52,040 --> 00:58:54,200
on account of there
being no windscreen.
1124
00:58:54,240 --> 00:58:55,280
What?
1125
00:58:56,560 --> 00:58:59,120
Maybe better I just show you, Doc.
1126
00:59:04,960 --> 00:59:06,320
Really?!
1127
00:59:06,360 --> 00:59:10,080
Mind out, it's Santa coming through.
It's Santa coming through.
1128
00:59:10,120 --> 00:59:12,400
Attention, please.
1129
00:59:12,440 --> 00:59:16,160
Attention, everyone.
The parade is about to begin.
1130
00:59:16,200 --> 00:59:17,640
CHEERING
1131
00:59:17,680 --> 00:59:20,920
But before we begin,
I'd like to make a little speech.
1132
00:59:20,960 --> 00:59:22,440
This is boring!
I'm cold.
1133
00:59:22,480 --> 00:59:23,800
Ten years ago...
1134
00:59:23,840 --> 00:59:26,160
Santa? Maybe we could just,
you know, begin?
1135
00:59:26,200 --> 00:59:29,280
Well, we'll begin
when Santa says so.
1136
00:59:29,320 --> 00:59:32,000
All those in favour
of starting the parade, say aye!
1137
00:59:32,040 --> 00:59:33,720
ALL:AYE!
1138
00:59:33,760 --> 00:59:36,080
OK, everybody behind me,
stay in formation!
1139
00:59:36,120 --> 00:59:38,440
What about Daddy?
1140
00:59:38,480 --> 00:59:41,360
Yeah, he said he really wanted
to be here, but...
1141
00:59:41,400 --> 00:59:44,840
Don't worry about Daddy, little man.
Santa's here now.
1142
00:59:44,880 --> 00:59:49,520
Ho-ho-ho! Merry Christmas!
1143
00:59:49,560 --> 00:59:53,200
Merry Christmas, everyone!
1144
00:59:53,240 --> 00:59:55,480
Ho-ho-ho!
What the...?
1145
00:59:55,520 --> 00:59:58,440
Sit down! Your leg!
You'll burst the stitches.
1146
00:59:58,480 --> 00:59:59,920
Keep your eyes on the road.
1147
00:59:59,960 --> 01:00:05,040
Merry Christmas, everybody!
1148
01:00:05,080 --> 01:00:07,840
Presents for everyone!
Martin?!
1149
01:00:07,880 --> 01:00:09,800
Hello.
1150
01:00:09,840 --> 01:00:14,320
Merry Christmas! Ho-ho-ho!
1151
01:00:14,360 --> 01:00:16,520
Merry Christmas!
Put your seatbelt on.
1152
01:00:16,560 --> 01:00:19,560
Come on, Doc!
All right.
1153
01:00:19,600 --> 01:00:23,200
CHEERING
1154
01:00:23,240 --> 01:00:26,320
All together now! Ho-ho-ho!
1155
01:00:26,360 --> 01:00:28,360
PARADERS:# Jingle all the way
1156
01:00:28,400 --> 01:00:33,200
# Oh, what fun it is to ride
In a one-horse open sleigh, hey!
1157
01:00:33,240 --> 01:00:37,240
# Jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
1158
01:00:37,280 --> 01:00:40,280
# Oh, what fun it is to ride
In a one-horse... #
1159
01:00:40,320 --> 01:00:43,360
Told you I'd show you
the magic of Christmas, didn't I?
1160
01:00:43,400 --> 01:00:46,880
Er, yes. Yes, you did, yes.
But take it easy. Stay here.
1161
01:00:46,920 --> 01:00:48,680
Best seat in the house, Doc.
Yeah.
1162
01:00:48,720 --> 01:00:51,040
Mummy!
Did you enjoy that? Did you?
1163
01:00:52,600 --> 01:00:56,560
Well, that was quite an entrance.
I wanted to be here on time.
1164
01:00:56,600 --> 01:00:58,280
Daddy!
1165
01:01:02,040 --> 01:01:04,200
Did you enjoy that?
Yes!
1166
01:01:09,480 --> 01:01:11,360
There we go, my love,
you take care now.
1167
01:01:11,400 --> 01:01:13,200
I thought I said no sky lanterns.
1168
01:01:13,240 --> 01:01:15,920
During the parade, yes.
But the parade's over now.
1169
01:01:15,960 --> 01:01:19,120
Oh, come on. It's Christmas,
everybody's enjoying themselves.
1170
01:01:19,160 --> 01:01:20,480
No means no!
1171
01:01:20,520 --> 01:01:23,480
You know what, you're a great Santa.
1172
01:01:24,920 --> 01:01:27,440
Really?
Best we've ever had.
1173
01:01:28,600 --> 01:01:31,440
Well, I suppose you have already
given them out, haven't you?
1174
01:01:31,480 --> 01:01:34,560
So...
Here, go on. On the house.
1175
01:01:34,600 --> 01:01:37,200
Thanks. Merry Christmas, Bert.
1176
01:01:37,240 --> 01:01:39,080
And Merry Christmas to you, too.
1177
01:01:40,200 --> 01:01:44,880
OK. I believe you.
The turkey escaped.
1178
01:01:44,920 --> 01:01:48,320
I let it go.
Oh, I knew it, Mor. I knew it.
1179
01:01:48,360 --> 01:01:50,200
I'm sorry.
1180
01:01:50,240 --> 01:01:54,440
I think I was just feeling
a bit broody and hormonal.
1181
01:01:54,480 --> 01:01:56,400
Right, yeah.
1182
01:01:56,440 --> 01:01:59,160
You know, because of the baby.
1183
01:02:01,000 --> 01:02:03,120
What, the... the baby turkey?
1184
01:02:04,640 --> 01:02:07,240
No.
What, er...?
1185
01:02:12,240 --> 01:02:15,840
I was gonna wait till Christmas Day
to tell you, but, erm...
1186
01:02:15,880 --> 01:02:17,720
surprise!
1187
01:02:19,200 --> 01:02:20,200
Baby.
1188
01:02:20,240 --> 01:02:22,120
Yeah, a baby...
What?
1189
01:02:22,160 --> 01:02:25,120
Our baby.
Oh, Mor! Mor!
1190
01:02:28,240 --> 01:02:30,240
We're getting married. Again.
1191
01:02:30,280 --> 01:02:32,720
Congratulations, again!
Can I tell 'em?
1192
01:02:34,320 --> 01:02:37,440
We're having a baby!
Oh, it's not a competition, Al.
1193
01:02:37,480 --> 01:02:40,160
Well...
Congratulations!
1194
01:02:43,160 --> 01:02:45,720
Here, take this.
1195
01:02:48,040 --> 01:02:50,280
You know, some people,
when they light these lanterns,
1196
01:02:50,320 --> 01:02:52,240
they like to dedicate them
to people.
1197
01:02:52,280 --> 01:02:56,680
Absent friends or family...
or maybe someone they've lost.
1198
01:02:58,480 --> 01:03:01,000
I'm not sure if my mother
would appreciate a lantern.
1199
01:03:02,440 --> 01:03:04,400
It's not for her, Martin.
1200
01:03:23,960 --> 01:03:25,200
Thank you.
1201
01:03:28,880 --> 01:03:30,040
I love you.
1202
01:03:31,440 --> 01:03:33,320
I love you, too, Martin.
1203
01:03:39,600 --> 01:03:41,120
Hang on!
1204
01:03:41,160 --> 01:03:42,880
That one, where's it going?
1205
01:03:42,920 --> 01:03:45,520
Is that your lantern burning up?
1206
01:03:47,080 --> 01:03:50,240
Yeah, it looks like it's falling.
1207
01:03:50,280 --> 01:03:53,880
As long as the wind doesn't catch it
and it lands in the sea.
1208
01:03:55,960 --> 01:03:57,880
I think it's coming this way.
1209
01:04:03,680 --> 01:04:05,920
Oh, that's bad.
Oh, dear.
1210
01:04:07,520 --> 01:04:10,440
Erm, sorry. Sorry, everybody,
but I, er...
1211
01:04:10,480 --> 01:04:12,480
James!
1212
01:04:12,520 --> 01:04:15,480
Martin! James! James, come here.
1213
01:04:16,880 --> 01:04:19,800
Where's Penhale?
Penhale, call the fire brigade!
1214
01:04:19,840 --> 01:04:22,560
Everybody, stand back. Stand back!
1215
01:04:26,800 --> 01:04:28,800
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