All language subtitles for S06E01 - Good Grief

Before we begin,
I'd like to say how honoured I am

to be taking over this spot.

Obviously, I have
some rather big shoes to fill.

My predecessor here
was much beloved.

But I have never been one
to shrink from a challenge.

And I'm sure that we'll all enjoy

many happy years here together
in my new home.

Now, today on Medical Minute,

we're going to be tackling
the sticky subject of...

Thank you, Dr. Crane.
Great audition.

Really? That's all you need?

I think we have a good idea
what you're all about.

Excellent.

- We'll be in touch.
- I'm sure you will.

Next, please.

Oh, formalities. Yes, I understand.

Perhaps I'll just take a walk
around the station,

check out the dressing rooms,
introduce myself to a few people.

Say, you know, is there a sign-up list
for the softball team?

I'm sure that Frasier "Slugger" Crane's
gonna be an asset to this station

in more ways than one.

Morning, Frasier.

Oh, good morning, Dad.

- Little early for the piano, isn't it?
- Yes, I'm sorry about that.

I woke up this morning thinking
about that operetta I've been writing.

You know, the one about
Robert and Elizabeth Browning.

And I think...
Well, I just had to get right to it.

Well, that's what I get for living
in a big city.

If it's not the horns waking you up,

it's someone writing an operetta
about the Brownings.

Well, I'm pretty sure
that I've solved the problem.

- Good for you.
- But I'd have to hear it to be sure.

- I'll bet.
- Dad?

- Forget it.
- Come on.

- No, I've done it once, that's enough.
- Come on, it'll just take a minute.

- I just want to do this one section.
- Oh, all right.

But I'm not doing the accent.

That's fine.

All right, we'll take it from right here.

- Fine.
- All right.

What is it that you feel?

- Love
- Love

That fear makes you conceal

- Love
- Love

The power's there to heal

- Love
- Love

Reveal!

- Take me in your arms...
- I'm not doing this.

- All right, I'll sing it with Niles later.
- Oh, that'll cheer me up.

Dad, be careful
of those sketches there.

Sketches?

Yes, I've been planning
on redecorating the apartment.

I thought why not just design
my own furniture?

Boy, Frasier, you know, you've been
taking on a lot of big projects lately.

Well, Dad, you see, any moment

that phone is going to ring
with another job offer,

and this blessed little hiatus
will be over.

I want to have achieved as many
of my life's ambitions as possible.

Gee, Dad, frankly,
you should take up a project or two.

Me? What are you talking about?
I'm doing stuff all the time.

Why just this weekend,
I taught Eddie a great new trick.

- Really?
- Come here, boy. Yeah, I'll show you.

It starts out: I point a gun at him.

I like it so far.

Then I say,
"Freeze, punk, it's all over."

It's all over.

Oh, come on, Eddie,
you're supposed to go like this.

Well done, Dad.

Now you just have to teach Eddie
to say, "It's all over."

- Can someone help me here?
- What is all that?

Books Dr. Crane sent me
to get from the storage space.

It's research I'm doing
for a novel I'm planning.

Daphne, I was beginning to wonder
what was taking you so long.

Well, forgive me,
but I did have to move three crates,

a rowing machine and a cast-iron
bathtub out of the way first.

Oh, look at that, the only book I really
wanted was in the shelf already.

Here, Daphne,
you'll have to take these back down.

Oh, my God, that's my duck!

All right. Thank you, Daphne.

When you're done, I need you
to run some errands for me.

I need a very sturdy lemon zester,

some more music paper,
some potting soil and an easel.

Oh, be happy to.

Then after that,
maybe I could draw a bath,

strip you naked
and scrub you with a loofah.

- Would that be all right, Dr. Crane?
- Yes.

I didn't even see you standing there.

- Can I talk to you about something?
- Yeah, just a second, Dad.

Okay.

Well, it's about Frasier.

Ever since he got fired,
he's been so weird.

All these projects he's got going.

Yeah, don't worry, it's normal.
He's simply in a state of denial.

- Denial about what?
- About getting fired.

People like Frasier's whole identity
revolves around their job.

The loss of the job is like a...
Like a death.

They cope with it the same way
they would with a death,

by going through a series of stages.
The first one's denial.

Usually, that's followed by anger,
then...

I've done it!
Escoffier's most difficult dish,

done to tangy perfection.

You know, sometimes I think
I may have missed my calling

not becoming a gourmet chef.

- I see we're still in stage one.
- Hello, Niles.

Hey, Frasier,
you ready for our squash date?

Oh, gosh, I'm so sorry.

I'm gonna have to cancel.
I'll be cooking all morning.

- What for?
- Actually, I'm holding a little picnic

for the KACL employees
and their families.

As you may recall,
I did get them all fired.

Oh, yes.

So I was just hoping
to make amends

by serving up a little Duck a I'Orange
and an alfresco mea culpa.

You know, people like chips
at a picnic too.

Excuse me. Hello?

Yes, Bebe.

Yes. Yes, the television job.

Oh, yes, yes.

Oh, what a relief.

Thank you. Bye-bye.

- You got it?
- No, thank goodness.

That job starts tomorrow.
I have got things to do.

Oh, I'm sorry, Frasier.

Sorry?
My God, you sound just like Dad.

I am going to get another job.
The people of this city need me.

I'm a beloved Seattle institution.

Couple of more days like this,

he's gonna be
in a beloved Seattle institution.

Hey, doc. Roz.
Wait till you hear this.

- I got a job today.
- Really?

- Oh, my God.
- Good, good.

- You ought to rub me for good luck.
- Where?

Well, start on my knee.
Work your way up.

Where's the job?

Oh, it's that new all-sports station.

I got the breakfast slot.

I even came up with a slogan:

"Coffee, eggs and Bulldog."

Sounds like some sort
of a Malaysian Happy Meal.

A word of caution on the hummus:

To be avoided, as a leper
would avoid a Magic Teacup ride.

Gil, Frasier made that.

- Oh, I'm so sorry.
- It's quite all right. I understand.

You need to flex your critical muscles
while you're between jobs.

Oh, good.
Then you might enjoy this one:

After sampling your
unnuanced baba ganoush,

I was tempted to describe
your entire Middle Eastern buffet

as "The Sorrow and the Pita."

Oh, who's got a pencil?
I've got to write that one down.

- Hi, everybody.
- Oh, Tooty.

- Hey.
- I got the most exciting news today.

They just picked up my
Storytime Theatre on public television.

- Hey, all right.
- That's wonderful.

Talk about
living happily ever after, huh?

- Hey, Dr. Crane.
- Oh, well, Kenny.

Great party. Oh, by the way,

I picked something up for you
on my way to work today.

- Work?
- Yeah, yeah.

They took me back at my old job:

Anyway, I was passing
the bus stop and...

Excuse me a second.

Anyway, they were about
to paper over your poster,

so I peeled it off for you.

Well, that is quite a keepsake.

Don't mention it.

By the way, the poster under yours
was an old radio guy, Dr. Earl?

Who was he again?

You know, I'm sorry, I don't recall.

Yeah, I'm the same way.

Once they're off the air,
who remembers?

Do you realise
we're the only people here

- without a job?
- Roz...

If we don't get this Talk 100 spot,
there may not be any left.

Roz, I've told you
we have nothing to worry about.

Now, come on. Everyone?

If I could have your attention, please.

We, of course, have planned some
activities for today's little get-together.

And I'd like to start
with one for the children.

Now, what we have here
is an authentic Mexican pi�ata.

The object is to take the stick
and give it a little whack...

Bravo for me.
I just got the Talk 100 job.

Oh, well, good for you, Gil.

Yes, you're gonna wanna give
this little fellow a good crack.

Otherwise... You know,
maybe I better get this started for you.

Otherwise,
the candy will never come out.

And everybody knows
keeping something locked up inside

is never good for anyone, is it?

Hello?

Yes, Bebe. We did hear the news.

And how thrilling for Gil.

Could you hold, please?

What is this I feel?

Love

That fear makes me conceal

Love

Dad?

Was I doing it again?

Was I doing it
before Mrs. Walsh got off?

That's why Mrs. Walsh got off.

- So how's Frasier doing?
- Oh, he's getting weirder.

He beat up a pi�ata yesterday.

Isn't that what you're supposed to do?

Not like this.

They found a jawbreaker
on the other side of the highway.

Oh, well, this is good.

It means he's reached
the anger stage.

In due course,
he'll go through bargaining,

- depression and finally acceptance.
- What's bargaining?

It's like when a person makes a deal
with God to spare their life.

Oh, yeah, I know all about that.

I remember right after I got shot,
I said:

"God, if I promise never to drink
another bottle of Ballantine's,

will you let me get through this?"

- Dad, you still drink Ballantine's.
- Not in bottles, baby.

You're just in time.
I'm throwing a party for my fan club.

Here?

Is there some problem with the bridge
they normally meet under?

Very amusing, Niles.

You see, I've been doing
a lot of soul-searching lately,

and last night, I did something I haven't
done since I was a very little boy.

I got down on my knees at my bedside,
and I prayed for guidance.

And I asked God:

"What can I do
to get my old life back?"

And the answer came:

"Take better care of your fans."

- God told you that?
- Yes.

I have taken my public for granted.

I take weeks before I answer
my fan mail, if I answer it at all.

I've been a bad celebrity.

- But no more.
- I didn't even know you had a fan club.

Well, actually,
they meet on the Internet,

and I visited their website yesterday
for the first time.

Bad celebrity.

But I invited them all here,
and you know what?

They were so grateful
that before long,

I mean, God,
suddenly they were proposing

that they hold a massive rally
in my honour

demanding that I return
to the airwaves.

You know, I think it's safe to say

that someone is already working
in mysterious ways.

Someone sure as hell is.

Some of the crab puffs, Dr. Crane?

No, no, thank you.
Just keep those away from me.

Won't be long
before I'm back in the public eye,

and I've got to remain fighting trim.

- Oh, Daphne.
- What you got there?

Just a box of Dr. Crane's
publicity photos

from the storage cubby.

- Thank you.
- This flashlight sure came in handy.

Helped me to find that box
way up on the top of that old bookcase.

And when that thing flew in my hair,

I had something
to beat it to death with.

Oh, good Lord, our first arrivals.
God, I've got to check the food.

Daphne,
will you run to the store for me?

I need felt tip pens to sign
these pictures with, do you mind?

Sure. What else have I got to do?

Hi, Daphne. It's Daphne.

Hello. Have we met?

- We know you from the magazine.
- April '96, Seattle Monthly.

"At Home With Dr. Frasier Crane."
You wore an orange-flowered dress.

And your hair was different then.

Oh, how creepy. Do come in.

Come in. Come in.

- I'm Dr. Frasier Crane.
- Wow, hi.

- Hello.
- Doris Buckley.

- Doris.
- Aaron Fitch.

Aaron.
Oh, it's such a pleasure to meet you.

You know, perhaps
I should introduce these people to you.

We know who they are.

And now where we live.

Oh, don't be shy.

- Come in, come in.
- This is great.

This is great.

I'm Dr. Frasier Crane.
It's a pleasure to meet you.

This is great. This is great.

It's cool, isn't it?
Your brother having his own club.

Yeah, well, seeing all of you,
I sort of wish I had a club myself.

You know, perhaps
you'd like to fill out these nametags.

- We'll wait for everyone else to come.
- Who else is coming?

- Well, the rest of the fan club.
- This is the fan club, the three of us.

Well, I'll be off
to get those pens now.

You know, perhaps you should
all help yourself to some food.

Niles, may I have
a word with you, please?

Niles!

I can't let them hold that rally.
Three kooks marching in a circle.

- Do you know what that will do?
- Make them very dizzy very fast.

Make me a laughingstock.

I'll never work in this town again.
I've got to stop them.

Sorry to interrupt,
but I need to carve the second turkey.

No fighting
over drumsticks at this party.

Stop it.

How's everyone out here?

Great.
We were just talking about the rally.

- Really? I'm glad you brought that up.
- They had it this afternoon.

- In front of city hall.
- It couldn't have gone better.

George stopped traffic by lying across
the road on a psychiatrist's couch.

- The cameramen sure loved that.
- Cameramen?

What are we doing?
It's almost time for the 6:00 news.

You're gonna love this, Dr. Crane.

- What have you got there?
- The crab puffs.

- Shall I get you something else?
- Yes, please, bring me spring rolls.

Now, on the lighter side,
did you ever ask yourself

what if they held a rally
and nobody came?

This is great. This is great.

Eighty-six the spring rolls.
Bring me the freaking turkey.

- Frasier?
- Yeah, Dad.

You think we could talk
for a second in the living room?

Yeah, sure.
Gee, sounds kind of serious.

- Yeah, it is, kind of.
- Well, what is it?

Oh, Roz, I didn't hear you come in.

I think you had the blender going.

Frasier, we were wondering,
do you think you might be depressed?

Depressed?

Well, we've all noticed
that you've put on weight lately.

We're worried
that you might be eating obsessively.

Maybe I've gained a pound or two,
but it's nothing I can't handle.

So you think you've got
everything under control?

- Absolutely.
- It's time, Roz.

Remember when I had that babysitter
who was stealing from me,

so I had to put in
the hidden camera?

Yes.

And you remember
when you babysat for me?

- What about it?
- Just watch this.

Well, I think it's mealtime,
baby Alice.

Let's see what's on tonight's menu.

Oh, yes, strained beef
and lima beans.

All right, point taken,
I've put on a pound or two.

But the camera adds ten.

Open up. Come on.

Come on, come on.

You know, it's very good.
Here, I'll show you, here.

Oh, my.
All right, now it's your turn.

Now, come on. No?

Still? Well, you know,
that's not even a proper spoonful.

Let's get you a full one.

That's a nice big one.

You know what?
Let's try something else.

How about some pur�ed chicken
and yams?

This looks very good.
Now, here we are.

All right, here we go.
Come on, open up, open up.

No? Well, if you're not hungry,
you're not hungry.

Oh, my.

Wow, it's actually pretty good
together. Let's try that.

What's that you have
in your sippy cup there?

- Is that apple juice?
- Oh, all right, enough, turn it off.

Well, I guess maybe you're right.
I am depressed.

What of it?

Well, we're just trying to help you
to get to, you know, the next stage.

- Stage of what?
- Frasier...

...you're dealing with the loss of your
job as many people do with a death.

Only you've got yourself
stalled in depression.

And I think you're gonna stay there

until you let yourself grieve
for everything you've lost.

Your job, your friends.
The money, your reputation...

You've gotta let it out, Frasier.

Well, I thank you all
very much for your concern,

but you know what?

If I was repressing anything,
I would certainly know it.

The only thing I need to let out

are these so-called
big-and-tall lounge pants.

- Well, that went well.
- Yeah.

- Well, we gave it a shot.
- What will we do now?

Well, we can't push him.
If he's not ready, he's not ready.

- What was that?
- Was that Frasier?

If anyone's hungry,

there's a freshly made
Monte Cristo in the waffle press.

Oh, great. Thanks, Fras.

Dr. Crane, you all right?

- Yes.
- Are you sure?

I'm quite sure.

Frasier, you're not famous anymore.

- What the hell did you do that for?
- No, no, Dad, he needed a push.

Yeah? Well, look at him.

- This can't be good.
- No, it is good.

Let it all out, Frasier.

Let it all out. That's good.
That's right, Frasier.

Let it out. Okay.

Okay. All right.

Yeah, I think
that's probably enough now.

Okay.

- How much more can be in there?
- Okay.

Okay. All right.

Yeah, that's probably enough now.

Okay.
I don't think I can get him to stop.

- But this is sickening.
- Yeah, what are we gonna do?

Somebody get
that Monte Cristo in here.

Frasier, it's all
in how you look at things.

Look at my life.

No career, no relationship,
no hope...

You can say
the same thing about me.

I was talking about you.

Dr. Crane,
my Grammy Moon had a saying...

What are you trying to do, kill him?

Well, don't blame this on me.
She brought the bloody tape over.

Oh, so now this is all my fault.
You saw that tape.

I've seen your baby too.
She could stand to miss a meal or two.

- She's a healthy baby.
- Oh, stop it.

Stop it, all of you.
There is no hope.

It's over. It's all over.

Well, look at that.

I'm so proud of you, boy.

Dad, you're just saying that.

- Hello, Niles.
- Frasier, please join me.

Thank you very much.

- I would love to have...
- Wait.

Mochaccino, extra whipped cream
and a Linzer Torte, right?

Not anymore.

I'll just have a non-fat latte, please.

- Hey, didn't you used to...?
- Yes, yes, I used to be on the radio.

With any luck, I will be again.

Thank you for remembering.
It does help.

I was just gonna say, didn't you also
used to get a bear claw?

Off you go.

Well, Frasier,
I just have to say bravo.

You're slim, well-adjusted.

You've really turned things around,
haven't you?

Well, it's easy once you hit
rock bottom and bounce.

Thank you, Niles,
I couldn't have done it without you.

I did nothing
you wouldn't have done for me.

And you'll be happy to know

my own life
is on quite the upswing as well.

Really?

I just got back from a meeting
with Maris and her lawyers.

Oh, and?

I think this divorce
is going to go very smoothly.