All language subtitles for Josephine.S.Arrondit.2016.French.720p.BluRay.x264-ZEST-en

For the love of God, Josphine,
let me drive

I can not stop!

We're going to die!

Damn it!

It has a hospital 13km.
Next exit on the right.

No, my birth will be in Paris.
with my gynecologist.

Turn right!

I did not bring it
nor my suitcase.

Jos phine,
You're giving birth,

shut up then
and turn right!

-Don't call Gilles.
- I'm calling.

-No.
-Yes.

Yes! Yes!

Gilles, here's Sophie.
All right?

It's just to say that Jo's birth
will be in Caen.

Kisses, bye.

Again!

-Josphine!
-Caution!

Is it dirty? For!

Five, four, three,
two one...

Happy New Year!

My love finally
understand what irony

Thank you because
It was not Sophie who cooked.

No, it's heavy.

Did you like it, dear?

Beautiful.

You do not get serious!

Five, four, three,
two one...

Happy New Year!

My mother
totally crazy

You did not even introduce me!
-Because she's crazy!

You went to have dinner with her again.
and he did not invite me.

I can not be alone.
with my mother

JOS PHINE EST GR VIDA

Subrip and Sync: Pix

Hello, my dear!

My boyfriend is a cat.

No, speaking Seriously,

I do not want to brag,
but he's handsome.

I mean,
I can boast, yes.

I did very well.

What? I changed the look.
of him.

Every woman does this
with her boyfriend.

He likes the same
silly programs that I,

cook as a chef,

Fact as a god,
but you do not know ...

There is nothing wrong.

It can not be.
There's nothing wrong.

I have to find
something,

It will not happen
something horrible.

I found: my sister is depressed,
who has lived with us for two years,

after leaving the groom
on the day of the wedding.

Diane?

No, nothing.

Shit! I dozed off.

Who was eliminated?

Jacqueline.
She let the pie burn.

Oh, no! Her macarons
they had devastated!

-What's it?
-I love you.

Twenty five,
twenty-six...

Gilles!

-Gilles.
"What?"

-When did I menstruate?
"I do not know."

Diane will know.

-Diane!
-The light...

Diane. Diane.

Wake up, Diane. Diane!

Diane, Diane, Diane.

When you lent me
an absorbent?

He wears the socks,
and we're going to the pharmacy.

"And why lock the door?"
- I'm not going anywhere.

And I shut the door
to feel at home.

That's weird!

It must be because you
He is not at home.

I'll give you a house,
food and laundry,

so shut up
wears the socks

and pick up the key from your car.

I would not be here.
if you had not sold

the grandmother's apartment
to live with Gilles.

You received
The same check as me.

-The light!
-I needed a car.

POSITIVE

I'm pregnant.

I'm pregnant.

I'm pregnant.

Say something.

I...

I...

A little ... But anyway ...

As
You'd better not say anything.

Did you see Alexandra?

She came back from office.
Go talk to her.

-She's coming.
"Of course.

Gilles, that's great!
I really need to talk to you.

This Bakary.

-Hi.
"Say hello, Bakary.

Ready.

Are you coming to my office?

Okay, I'll go.

I'm screwed. Fucked!

I got the Rochemant demo.

Who am I to ...?

Who am I?

He did not even talk to me before.

Whatever you try
befriend employees.

No, my love?
They did something ugly with Mom.

"Do you love Mommy?"
-No!

Wait a minute.

Sophie, you can come here,
please?

Sophie, take a look.
in Bakary.

Here.

Kiss, my love.

I was crazy to smoke.

Excuse me. Sorry, Gilles.

Where were we? I remembered.

Rochemant meets
our largest customers,

and I do not have time
to look for a replacement.

-You're going to be the new director.
"What?"

We either lose
the Zorah Lingerie campaign.

Want it?

I know it's not your area,
but we're in this together.

What the agency
of jobs said?

They offered me
surface agent.

In your area you have nothing.

-For.
-Did it hurt.

And to think that your sister was
abandoned on the day of the wedding.

She has not been abandoned, Mother.

She said "no"
in time

to an idiot
who was cheating on her.

D in it.
And you and Gilles go well?

Are you still together?

Jojo, you would tell me if ...

Mo, I live with Gilles.
It's been two years.

We bought an apartment
together.

You dined here?
three weeks.

These young people
on the contrary.

At least
You do not have children.

I'm late.
I have to go, kiss.

Kiss.

That I

She massacred you.

- Hi, Mom.
- It's me.

If you forgot me
or do you have a new boyfriend?

I do not have anyone.

"She massacred you."
-Shut up.

I've been very busy
at work.

Liar.

Bastard
You never lied, did you?

So you never
will get married.

Want to end up single,
like Jos phine?

M e, Jojo is not single.

It does not matter.

They've been together for two years.
There is something wrong there.

There ...

You'll be happy.

Jo did not tell you?

That's weird!

Such good news!

-Al ? To the
Give me that.

Al

-You'll have to tell.
- , but no.

To the

legal, no ?

But we're done.
to move,

so there's a lot
to do.

But the greatest beauty, no?
I loved it.

Now let's go outside.

The outside!

Wow! Even.

the greatest comfort.

-Conveniently.
-Fernando!

Thank you.

Now she speaks English,
did you see him?

Even. Fernando!

I forgot to show.
See you.

It was the last extravaganza
of George. Beautiful, no? ?

Even ...

So you.
She is finding herself.

-Ol .
-Hi.

All right?

-Hi friend.
-Oh, Chlo .

-It's all right?
-All. And you?

-Look at her boyfriend.
"He?"

Your pilates teacher
said he will be late.

-Did you hear that?
"Pilates teacher."

Hi, everybody.

-Ol !
-Hi!

Not bad,
but I liked Fernando.

-How horrible!
-Stop it.

When will you visit me?
in LA, envious?

Go laughing. You left,
and I now work double.

Have you chosen?

-One beer.
- A mojito.

Beer.

Mojito.

Did you choose?

Mojito.

No, a light coolant.

No, no.
I meant "mojito".

No, sorry.

No, a light coolant.

You are pregnant!

You're pregnant!

Incredible!
I want to be a godmother.

I like you so much.

You're the best.

-Refrigerant or mojito anyway?
-Soda. Of course.

It does not offer alcoholic
to a debt.

Since when?

But are you going to have the child?

How many weeks?

I do not really understand.

They are very ugly.

Looking at this,
does not feel like it

Not really.

But when
What does Gilles do?

I do not know, he had a meeting.
with Alexandra.

Alexandra!

He did not tell you
of Bakary?

No? It's incredible.

She adopted an African.

We felt
that she was not well.

She took a leave of absence.

and, a beautiful morning,
she looked like Bakary.

-Lie.
-Truth.

She went to get him.
in an orphanage in Mali.

-MS. Lapierre.
-We are us. We are us.

Are you coming?

Forgets.
It's my gynecologist.

Come on.

MS. Lapierre,
your first appointment.

You think
What is your life?

Have you done a home test?

You should not have kept it.

Can?

I'll wash my hands.

What cat!

You came
with your partner?

No, we're friends.

And 100% h tero.
Mainly me.

Because you ...

MS. Lapierre,
you can take your clothes off?

Let's do an ultrasound.

-Is the top part?
- The bottom.

Good, I'll ...

Sorry, but the ultrasound
no navel

At the beginning of pregnancy,
we do a pelvic ultrasound.

-In the vagina.
-I'll get back to you.

-No. Stay, please.
-Relax, relax.

Open your legs slightly.

Breathe.

So where is he?

There you are.

Let's try to listen
his heart.

Recapping:
blood test, prescription,

health plan statement
and the list of foods to avoid.

The date of conception
It's been about ten weeks.

"Ten weeks?"
"Ten weeks.

Ten weeks.

The day of the change.

Always has a scrawl and rolls
during the changeover.

Why did not I get nauseous,
beautiful hair,

big boobs and such?

The cool things
they never happen to me.

If it serves as consolation,

h 50% chance
of having hemorrhoids,

fluid retention
and gastric reflux.

See you in two months.
for the next ultrasound.

I arrived. I got it.

I arrived. Has it begun yet?

-Thanks. Bye, doctor.
-Goodbye.

-Goodbye.
-Goodbye.

Gilles.

I'm the father.

Something wrong?

-It was stressful at the beginning ...
"What?"

Have you seen the doctor?

With such a doctor,
I'd get a ringworm every day.

Take the ultrasound.
I have to go.

Father, mother! Father, mother!
Look at them!

Just look at me!

I'm going to ride the carousel.
Whole life.

- Come on, it's a spoonful.
-No.

For mommy and be happy.
It does not hurt.

Let's go.

Mom, cad my underwear?

They have their socks clean,
as always.

Mo?

"Gilles, wake up.
-What's it?

Gilles!

I thought about it. No, no.

I'll look like my mother.

Just like my mother.

Have you thought?

It stopped to think
in our lives?

Our life will be
washing clothes

Thousands of dirty clothes.

It's food.
Making food all the time.

Pur , noodles, ground beef.
Pur , noodles, ground beef.

Let's have to see
the dance of the little school

or football matches.

But we can not sleep.

And this will be
very difficult.

And to do this,

Our son will have
than having arms and legs.

Check this out.

Are you seeing arms and legs?

No!

Because it does not!

It has bean form.

I'm in 10th week.

"There's still time ..."
-Okay, let's make a list.

This is idiotic.

No, that's when we decide.
if we have a son.

Why not?

But if it was for me ...

I know, you're perfect.
I'm just a ...

The list for this.

"Let's start with the evidence.
-For example?

"We love each other, do not we?"
"True.

A plus, you see?

Your turn.

A counter.

My priority
get a job.

You are unemployed
Two years ago, Jo.

.

Now I.

A plus point ...

With the resignation of Rochemant,

I got promoted
and I gained a raise.

Now you.

Say something positive, my love.

One against:

I would like to lose 10kg
before becoming pregnant.

The 10kg I gained
because of you, there.

You've never been so beautiful.
like now.

I'll put it as pr .

No, imagine if he pulls
My hip?

I was lucky to meet you.
He's going to die alone.

-Jo, you want this child?
"I do not know."

I want. I do not want it.

Tomorrow?

Can not make an effort
to find a point in favor?

I know

Who are going to stay
in your place at work?

Hi, Lolita!

-It's all right?
-All.

"Those are Sophie and Josphine."
-Hi.

Girls,
this the temple of the tape.

Give it a try.

One, two, three.

No, no.

Is everything okay, Jo?
-All.

Ready.

Very cool. Good.

Did he vomit only once?

, but wait a .
Of course I understand ...

Of course, but ...

Okay, he has to go.
with clean clothes.

OK Alright.

To the To the

They turned it off in my face.

Yes, because he went
to school sick.

But no
no bubonic plague.

I totally agree.

-The school is a dictatorship.
-But what can I do?

Stay at home
and lose your job?

How to be single?

You're just a freak.
So it happens

We leave our children
five years ...

Five years!
All day in daycare.

He is five years old and has days.
As long as mine.

Sorry I...

Why did you come?

What did you come here for?
You look beautiful today.

Thanks.

I was hired.

It's fine.

Except one against.
We really do have cons.

I'll scratch the "unemployed."

Okay, I put it on.
everything in the bag:

clean clothes,
school address

Then you can go to the playground
which he loves, okay?

And please,
Nothing to fear, okay?

I put raisins
and jam in his snack,

but nothing sweet
and soda.

Now I have to go
to the meeting.

I will work
on the administrative side.

But at 11:30 a.m.
I give Bakary food

it's at 4:30 p.m.
I'm going to get him at school.

Look on the bright side.

Cool from her
hire a pregnant woman.

-What's it?
-Are you crazy?

Of course I did not say anything.

Do you know any company?
Who hires kids?

"Thanks for the opportunity.
Up in 4 months. "

<> 16h. I'll go.

What happend my love?

Finished the chocolate,
Then I got the ice cream.

All right, I'll buy more.

What happened to your nose?

I wanted to separate
the children in the park,

because Bakary got it
the colleague dolls,

but they attacked me.

And then my mother beat me

because I slapped a
who put his finger in my eye.

It was horrible.

My love.

I can not.

We can not have Feij o,
Gilles.

-L can not.
-Yes, you can.

And our son will be nice.
Very nice.

She will not like me.

Do not want to talk
about it with anyone?

I know, some ...

Maybe it'll do you good.

I do not know. I can talk to Sophie.
I know l .

I can not stand more strong smell,
I do not know why.

At the perfume of Gilles ...

I get disgusted

Give me your hands.

My feet swelled,
and I go to the bathroom all the time.

Let's go out tonight?

I can not today.

Really?

What are you going to do?

Are you going out with who?

Someone from Facebook
or Tinder?

-Snapchat?
- Not that.

Tell me.

So ...
I was in a bar.

A guy jumped
on top of me. Incredible.

He made me crazy.

I almost felt ashamed.

- Hi, doctor.
-Hi.

Do not you remember me?
The friend in the office.

And how does he?

Swedish guy, you know?

Long hair,

very blonde,

pretty green eyes ...
A Swedish theme.

Let's go home.

On the face,
without any preliminary?

Let's skip the houses.
"dinner", "meeting" etc.

I do not want to
a relationship".

What is a "relationship"
for you

A boring relationship.

Dinner for two
with a look of dead fish

because the rest of the world
does not exist.

And ask: "What do you
Are you thinking, dear? "

"And you, kitty?"

No, thank you.

It's fine.

If I invite you
to a cold restaurant,

do not look in the eyes
and do not ask any of this,

Would not it be a relationship?

No.

I know Japanese.
Emile Zola Street, 27.

Ter a, at 8:30 p.m.?
Is that okay with you?

All.

Then I will.

Better, impossible.

No clinging, chatting
and have to give satisfaction.

Total freedom.

I'm too young
To date Serious.

Jo?

Jos phine?

Are you there?

I know you are.

I've been waiting an hour
behind you.

Sophie.

She can not have dinner with me.
because he met an excellent guy.

Really?

Such a cool guy.
Who wants to have a child with her?

It's not that kind of cool.

A guy who does not have
fear of commitment

and grow old with it?

Also.

What is it, Jo?

I'm afraid.

Afraid of what, my love?

Of everything.

If it is not good,

of childbirth,

to munch all over
l below.

Of what?
-Anything.

Jos phine, you will be
A wonderful girl.

-You think?
Of course.

Trust me.
Open the door please.

No, my makeup.
is erased.

I'm looking
a panda bear.

I want to pass
the whole life with you,

that our children
they look like you.

I do not want to have kids.

With u that i want
have children.

So I wanted to
make an official request:

Do you want to be?

the mother of my children?

I want.

I want, I want, I want, I want

But you want more than one?

I do not know, let's see.

Let's get out of the bathroom?

-We are stuck.
"Yes, I had left."

Jo.

I found one, look.

-"Be father".
-OK.

I think I'll take
"Pregnancy For The Laity".

-Look, "The Pum Fly."
-The special number "Pregnancy".

-It's that?
-OK.

Hello!

It's very easy.

Wait.

Watch your paw.
The paw.

DO NOT BUY ANYTHING
IN THE FIRST MONTHS.

Paco.

Pr s: name of impact.
Spanish. Exotic.

"Paco ... Paco!"
My mom would like it.

Against: Paco Rabanne.

Aladdin. Aladdin.

It's a name that delights.

Diminutive: Al.
Against: kind of ridiculous.

Cassandre:
It's beautiful and poetic.

Jules ...
Flower ... Tess ...

Henri-Gabriel.
We can call him HG.

stylish,
sounds kind of hip-hop.

-You can not see very well.
-He disappeared?

-What's it?
-The fat layer messes up.

You got fat
how many pounds?

Two or three at the most.

Let's see on the scale,
but I'd say about seven.

The baby is 25cm.

His stomach
gets full fast.

If you overeat,
can develop diabetes.

I'll tell him that.

Every day has a plate.
with cream, a pizza

or know what else.

The Feij o will be obese,
and I, diabetic.

There he is.

My God! My baby.

- He has arms and legs.
- a complete model.

Want to know sex?

-We want to!
-No!

-No!
-We want, yes, Jo.

It's all right.

No.

What about Gilles Junior?

If it's a girl,
can be Madeleine.

The nickname will be Mado.
The name of a prostitute.

Come here.

Your sister knows she's going to have
to leave because of the baby?

No.

She is easy, you do not want
I hurt her, but ...

She is not easy. Crazy

That nothing!
She's getting better.

Look, just what I bought.
on the telesales channel. optimal.

"Is everything alright, Gilles?"
- Hi, Diane.

It's all right. Everything great.

It was bad, Brad Pitt.

Look, Mommy called.

We have to arrive at 7:00 p.m.
for Christmas.

Let's make the prespio
in the church later.

I told her
that you agree.

That, no. Why?

What a mess!
I'm always the donkey.

-Prespio? What presuppio?
- Leave it to him.

Christmas, Christmas ...

Diane, what's this?

I'm teaching Brad Pitt.
to use the vessel.

You have deconcentrated it.
It was almost.

How hot in here!

Diane, we have to talk.

It is a question of hygiene.
You're going to have a baby.

In the room.

And take this business da .

"Are you kicking me out?"
-No.

I'm not pushing.

But I'm going to have a baby.

And, I know,

maybe it's time for you
find a way in your life.

A way?

There's no way.

Look.

You were pity.

I mean,
it would be good to find a middle ground.

Nothing to see,
I had a dung face.

That nothing!

And you did not talk like that.
I am that way.

You are beautiful, elegant,
educated and very sociable.

So it seems. You hated me.

-With that, my face ...
-Stop it.

You always were.
a model of perfection for me.

I'm a scriber
near you. Look at this.

Dad and mom ...

Hear?

It worked.
Brad Pitt is peeing.

Damn it! He missed the vase.

"Father, Mother,

Gilles and I ... "

"Mother, father,

Gilles and I ... "

Do not worry.
Everything will work out.

They will stay
very happy.

Anatole?

Ugly

What are you doing?
We are late.

It's a quickie.
It's five minutes.

I'm stressed.

And what do you think of Jules?

I'm going to put on the tape.

No clothes
it fits more in me.

I like the name Jules.

I was hot
because of the tape

And I thought it was
the button that opened the window.

Shut up.

What a mess!
Do you know how much a hood costs?

Yes, because you're afraid.
to tell them.

It's not my fault
if you did not get married

and you're not even baptized.

You fill me up,
Jos phine!

It's all broken!

Finally.

One hour late.
Let's eat soon.

-Good night.
-Good night.

Good night.

You got fat, did not you?

May the Lord bless
this meal,

and that we meet one day
Your table. Am.

-Am m.
-Am m.

What time is it?

-M ...
-My God!

It's 45 minutes.
I'll bring the turkey.

The turkey.

Cut the turkey.

Dad, mom ...
"Sit down, sit down."

I loved the bouquet
that you sent, Diane.

Thank you, mine.
newest floral creation.

Beautiful, no?

- What?
"You know very well.

The bouquets
from my online store.

An online store. My Diane
s has bright ideas.

I minimize costs
Working at home.

You could hire
your sister as an accountant.

I already said
I got a job.

Yeah, whatever.

If it was not
for your sister, no?

Well, father, mother ...

Therefore,

Gilles and I ...

-Gilles and I are going ...
-Marry!

Finally, my God!

Now yes.
My God! My God!

How happy I am!
-No ...

-Jacques, get the camera.
"No, Jacques.

Go get the camera.
Let's take a picture.

-I'll put the ...
-Hurry up.

-Attention, I put the ...
-Right. Smile and stop talking.

What a mess!

What a mess!
What a mess! What a mess!

Ms. Lapierre,
You got over it.

It's amazing how you are.
surprises us every year.

We strive.

Want a Classic Ceremony
for your daughter's wedding?

"Francoise, can we talk?"
Yeah.

"There was a misunderstanding.
Father Dumain is very liberal.

He can baptize you,
if you do not have another religion.

Are you a Jew, Gilles?

Come on, Gilles?
Kiss, Mom.

But now? I wanna talk
about the wedding party.

You can stay.
We are tired.

Are you back by taxi?
Kiss, father.

- A little misunderstanding.
-"Small"?

-You said we were getting married.
"It was my mother who said it.

Call her now
and tell the truth.

I can not. She was going to die.

But if she finds out by herself
in a few months,

because it will be obvious,

I pretend I am
denying pregnancy,

the marriage is annulled,
and we announce the baby.

I think it might work.

- Are not you coming home?
I do not want to.

-Mo, where are you?
-On here.

-Poxa, m e!
"I'm hot, Gilles.

Wear something.

I work naked
in my house when you want

What's it?

Please, m e,
wear something.

It's fine, it's fine.

I'm going to put on my nightgown, okay?

This boy is a Puritan.

-Hurry up.
"As if it were a dirty thing."

Do not forget
that you left her.

It was the first thing
that you saw in life.

My vagina.

Come and give me a kiss.

-Are you dressed?
- I can, you can.

Hi, Mom.

Hi dear.

-It's all right?
-All.

And you?

So what?

How was this Christmas?
in the house of the in-laws?

-J said that I do not smoke it.
-How nice! More left for me.

-Mo?
"What?"

I'm going to be a father.

That Cool!

And I fought with Josphine.
- That's cool, too.

Nothing more suspicious
that a couple that does not fight.

- , but ...
- I'll tell you what.

When there is no fight,
somebody made of cat and shoe.

I think that's me.

That's why I never wanted
live with nobody

I was 16 years old.
and I turned very well on my own.

I know, Mom.

Free Love, 1970s,
polygamy...

I have three potential parents,
but in the end, none.

I do not like conflict,
I do not say anything then

I really like to see her happy.
that I can not say "no".

"I can not make a decision."
-Have to learn.

You're going to be a father, dear.

And this will be even worse.

Wants to know?

I'm going to sleep here today.
just to chat

That.

"I'm not a puppy.
-That's it.

She has to start
to obey me now.

-Very well.
- !

Damn it!

Forty years of feminism,

and I'm talking
for you to be macho.

In the old days
we had convictions.

Then we had kids.

And now we have
heat attacks.

You do not do that.

Why does not he come back?

Maybe it happened.
something.

What's this?

Start. Start, asshole!

Or otherwise
he met somebody.

What's up?

Give me that.
-Leave me!

-What are you going to do?
-Leave me!

For ... Help!

- Whose bag?
-Leave me.

You will not do anything.

You saved me.

Kiss Me.

Excuse me. I do not understand.

The first time
where it happens.

- No problem.
-Yes, yes.

We tried 15 times,
and the thing does not enter.

-Didn't you close it again ...?
-No.

Word from gynecologist.

Come here

do not worry

The more stress,
less works.

We have time.

Little kisses.

Sophie, it's me again.

I do not know you, but ...

But my christmas
It was not very cool.

I think I screwed up.

Call me when
receive the message. Kiss.

It's me.

Diane?

What's it?
My lipstick is erased?

No.

No, you were ...

I know.

The horrible and vulgar character
Who did you hang out with?

That's it.

It was a blackout.
Or a nervous breakdown, I do not know.

-Whatever.
Two-year break?

I think the news
of their marriage helped.

Funny how sometimes
we need so little

Are not you fat?
It does not matter.

Mom and I
we began to organize.

We will be at least 120.

Watch with Gilles
his guest list.

We think
that May 9 would be ideal.

To amend
with the holidays.

You are traveling.

I'm going to take my things away
from the bedroom, of course.

I can not bother
the newlyweds.

I insist.
There's no problem.

"Jos phine,
You will hear me.

You will respect me. "

I liked this one.

"No more dictatorship,
to treat me like a ref m. "

"Ref m" legal.

"Do not raise your voice for me."

"Do not raise your voice."

I can not believe you faked it.
being pregnant

And I believed.
He's like a duckling.

Only you can invent.
such a thing.

All right, Gilles?

All. We have to talk,
Jos phine.

Diane came and said
that will move.

Do not interrupt me.

No, I just said
that, as we are getting married,

-Diane thinks she should not stay.
- I'm not even there!

I'll go now,
because it's getting late

My mother and I are going
to visit places for ceremonies.

I give you a little kiss
and keep you informed.

I'll go. Goodbye, Gilles.

I'll speak for the last time:
give your way.

But if you do not know
act as an adult

and tell your parents
who is expecting a child,

I'm going to sleep on the couch!

- You're late.
-I know.

Bakary is with a fever
again.

Stay with him at home
this afternoon.

Let me see.

He has no fever.

You have nothing.
Liar.

I like being with you.

Comes.

Ma, the door!

Good Morning.
I am Anne de Beauvallet.

A huge pleasure
receive them here.

-Good Morning.
-Good Morning.

-Good morning, little boy.
-Damn it!

Stop, Bakary.

"I do not know where he heard that.
-Really weird.

-Can we see the house?
-Let's go.

Stop, Bakary.

Are not you fat?

This is the fourth master.
-Damn it! Damn it!

For you,
Bridal sundae

Very beautiful.

Here is the room
of guests.

This is the room to receive
the guests.

Damn it! Damn it!
Damn it! Damn it!

We have the privilege
to have a flat ground.

Really?

These trees are incredible.

They must be over 100 years old.
Wonderful.

And these ferns?
What a beauty!

-What's their name?
"Ask Diane.

It's not ferns.
There are laurels.

As Jean-Louis is here,

wanted to show
the optional balloon flight.

Young couples love it.

Does not that sound like Bakary?

Jos phine, look at me!

Damn it...

I mean, shit! Bakary!

-Idiot!
-Idiot?

-Bakary!
-Caution!

Jos phine!

-I'm afraid.
-It's alright.

Let's fly a little bit.

And then we came back in a good mood.

Did you know that I went?
helicopter pilot

No.

Just pull there
that people come down.

Now let's stop
of pulling things.

And I'm going to ask for help.
Oh ...

"Pox" is a good one.

{Good Morning. Shortly,
the weather forecast.

{But before
a last minute news

that we just received.

Earlier today,

a young woman fled in a balloon

taking with you
a five-year-old boy.

It can be unbalanced,
or perhaps a bit fragile,

we still do not know
the reason for the escape.

I want my mother.
-I will call her.

Damn it! It has no signal.
Sorry.

Wow.

Okay, I do not have a phone anymore.

Okay, come here, Bak.
Come here.

Let's play
paper and scissors?

-Knows?
-No.

No? It's very easy
You will see.

The balloon has just landed,
Michel.

This is a woman,
a certain Jos phine Lapierre,

that, on an impulse,

decided to run away
carrying a child.

I'm here
with Gertrude Binet.

Come here, Bakary.
My dear.

All right, dear?

You!

I trust you
the blood of my blood,

And what do you do?

-I'm really sorry.
-Apologize?

For not having warned
that he was sick?

For placing
he in a balloon?

Or because he flew with him
3km from the ground?

Wants to know?
You're fired.

It's happening
something.

Let's go!
to try to see what .

The situation is delicate.

It seems that there is
a push-push.

We are approaching.

I will amend
with the maternity leave!

She's totally crazy.
Let's go.

-You crazy!
"Bye, Josphine.

Are you pregnant?

Diane, I'm grateful.
It's been six months.

Six months.

I've been six months
Thank you Gilles, m e.

Will I be av ?

Oh, how wonderful!

"I do not understand anything else.
-You pretend to be dumb or what?

Do not curse your sister.

She will take care of the flowers.
of the wedding of grace.

Ma, can you hear me?
at least one time?

There's no wedding!

Diane, no florist.
and you live with me for two years!

I took a course in Horticulture
and I moved.

Two days ago.
"Josephine wanted to abort.

- She spent her grandmother's inheritance.
-God!

Stop, stop.

Stop!

Take this!

Calm!

It's a good start.

Not yet a behavior
totally adult.

Next time,
you do not need

put life
of a child in danger.

But it's a good start.

It's me, Jo.

Please answer.
I am in the bathroom.

Please, Sophie.
Do not worry.

-You have vaginismus.
"What?"

- Psychological. It is very common.
-Nothing to see.

Cyril? I am in the bathroom.

You need to ask yourself.

why do not you leave
the penetration will happen.

very simple.

I call you later.

I? I, who do not?
How absurd!

Fifty shall say
the opposite.

"Fifty relationships?"
-I do not want a relationship!

We have a relationship
three months.

We spent Christmas together.

Do not make love
but we do not let go of each other.

Oh

Ready.

I'm dropping you.
Here.

Ready. Are you satisfied?

Go away! Go away!

"Did I hurt you?"
-No. It's good.

-It's all right?
-All.

Gilles!

He shifted.

Hi, here's daddy.

As if he answered.

My little boy.

Go to sleep, Feijoo,

what is my father and mother
They really want to have sex.

But I can not.

Gilles, I'll calmly ask,
without irritation:

fuck me

Wait for me...

In fact...

-Let's go!
-But...

Please please.

Just a little.

What da

No, I do not want to,
but I can not.

I can not.

I get caught up in knowing
that he is there.

So ...

This is my wizard.

Inside the tero,
has a bag with baby.

Here's Feijoo.

Do you understand?

-I am.
-Great.

Underneath is the neck of the tero,

and, below, has the vagina.

Ready.

Is here...
As it great, beautiful etc ...

Gilles,

You can even have everything in place.
and size,

but he could never
touch the baby

And if the head is down,
leaning on your lap

Okay, we'll delete it.
Let's forget about all this.

- You see this manga?
-I am.

Let's say that my tero,
my lap and my vagina, okay?

It's fine.

- And this here?
-I'm visualizing.

That, stronger!

And then...

Okay, and then ...

Give it to me.

The bag with the baby.

Do you see whipped cream?

No!

You can have sex with me
anyway,

but will never touch
no baby

Do you understand?

J .

But I do not know if I can.

This example
the new campaign.

As you can see,
The hand of a man

on her waist.

It symbolizes the alliance
of support with desire.

Not bad.
So I liked it.

I need the paychecks
of your spouse

and a medical certificate
of pregnancy.

Is it really necessary?

Yes ma'am.

The breath of fire,
the doggie.

I do not want to
nothing else in the belly.

Again again.
Until the end.

All right?

Gilles, he moved.
He shifted.

Are you hungry?

We only accept the originals.
Documentation is incomplete.

The nursery is asking for ...

Now yes.

I'm ready.

Bad.

Chicken with carrot.

Let me see the consistency.

Ham with broccoli

No, "vegetables,
rice and salmon ".

All right?

I can not take it anymore.
Poor life!

I stink
and wanting to vomit.

Jo, show
a little more enthusiasm.

We take time off for you.

Other than Chlo ,
Of course,

who is enjoying life
with a millionaire.

What's yours?

I think you
did not notice

Yesterday my mother
said that I gained weight.

I'm not fat.
I'm pregnant!

And I've been three months.
without having sex with Gilles.

I also, but I do not fill
the sack of no one.

Do you always get dressed?
scabies.

But it's true!

Your wonderful boyfriend,
You will have a child.

Stop complaining!

I doubt it will take three months
that she does not.

I doubt that.

Her relationship with Marc
complicated.

Marc? Who is Marc?

And why does she know?
even though it is far?

that people ...
No, Cyril?

And since when
She dates Serious?

What?

- I know him?
-No.

I know him.

-A little.
- A little tick.

You have already seen.

Hemorrhoids?

Cream or suppository?

Jean-Michel,
Do you still have Ultraproct?

-Has. Which one?
-Creme and suppository.

Thank you.

There you are, ma'am.

Anything else?

Julie, no?
Very well, Julie.

I'm enjoying it.
Congratulations to everyone.

Jos phine,

lift your hip well.

You have to feel
the stretching bowl.

That much better.

Let's breathe.

I breathe intensely
and I feel my tero.

I feel him stretching
and become my tero.

I am my tero.
But do not forget to breathe!

That, let's relax.

I'm very relaxed.

I'm relaxed
and discouragement until the end.

And now I contract.
That's it, Marco.

I squeeze with force.

With force, with force.

Are you in your party?

I look like I am
I do not play

Very well, Gilles.

- Very good.
-Thank you.

-What?
-Thank you.

You were great today.

-I liked to see.
-Goodbye.

"Bye, Christophe.
"Bye, Christophe.

I'll give it to you
the diagram of positions.

But working with me
it begins even after childbirth,

with the retonification
of per neo.

You will have to be assiduous,
it is incontinence.

No, we think it over.

and we decided to make Cesarean.

To start,
It's not your choosing.

And I know women.
who were not so lucky.

Many have another child.
only to have a normal birth.

-To feel better?
- .

You will want
More and more.

I do not want to
have many children.

But maybe he
have another opinion.

- , to be honest ...
-It's all right.

-Anything else?
-Yes.

You have the risk of
at the time of pushing.

"What?"
-Don't worry.

Nature is like that.
It is perfectly natural.

I recommend the microclister.

s put in the nus.

So in a good way.

Any question?

Only one debt: To do this.
before going to maternity

-or later?
- For ...

Ok I'll leave it
I give birth to you.

Jo?

Gilles, tell her
which has a smaller model.

It's fine.

Jo.

-Josphine, what is it?
"Who's talking to me?"

Ah, the guy who does not want to fuck,
but wants 12 children.

How funny!
Very funny.

I'm wearing geriatric diaper.
Just like my grandmother.

I pee all the time,
I sleep a little,

and you're always away.

I work 12 hours a day
and I do not miss an ultrasound.

Wow!
What a superhuman effort!

I had to paint
the baby's room,

load the furniture,
do the shopping,

tie your shoes

and I cook when I get home
for you, who did nothing.

- What else do you want?
-That's a pleasure.

It seems that you prefer
stay at work.

You do not look at me,
do not listen to me

You do not want me anymore.

I'm not a pregnant woman.
I am a woman.

No, you know what you mean?
A crazy one.

A nymphomaniac,
egocentric and historical!

-That, put it out.
-Shut up!

No, you could communicate
constructively.

Constructivism.

Your vagina
What are you going to do?

What about the episiotomy?
Have you made one?

What are you going to stay?
all loose down there?

For, Jos phine.

Are not you going to defend me?

At least one time?

We should go back home.
messing with this idiot.

And you would have made a joke
with such microclister.

You would have even tried
Just to make me laugh.

And you would have looked
for me with so much love

that I would not be afraid.

But that does not exist anymore.

Ended.

Ended?

I think...

Ended.

Sophie. Leave your message.

I'M IN A MEETING.
I'LL CALL YOU LATER.

I'M BEHIND THE DOOR.
WHAT HORRENDANT MUSIC IS THAT?

Are you wrong?

Me too.

What did you say?

Write him a letter.

But it was another shade of gray.

-White velvet?
-No, gray-brown.

"Yes, of course."
-This is the p rola.

Excuse me.

-I agree.
-Al ?

We have a problem.

The model of the hand
is in the hospital

It's a disaster.

Good Morning.

Pretend I'm not here.

I brought you a letter from Sophie.

I'll put it on the table.

Goodbye.

Good consultation.

But...

- What?
It was like mailing.

-What does that mean?
- That I delivered the letter.

-What did he say?
-No, I just delivered the letter.

-Anything?
-No.

Oh, what angst! Damn it!

It was exactly that
which I did not want.

Now i will stay
like an idiot.

"I'll wait like an idiot."
"But normal, Sophie.

"Your first love letter."
-For.

I'll figure out what to do.
So you forget.

Of course.

- We could get out of town.
-We need a car.

What a great weekend.
of reconciliation

That's for giving thanks.
to Sophie's parents around the house.

Good idea.

See that tree?
I never knew her name.

Japanese chestnut tree.

-Nice.
-No, Chinese nut.

Or Vietnamese.

But Asian, for sure.

It will bloom soon,
near the spring.

She looks beautiful all over Florida,
with pink flowers.

Unless it is
Australian.

It's very similar.

Australia is close to Asia.
Both are similar.

No! No, Josphine!

No, Josphine!
I'll tell Mommy!

He ended
to leave the workshop!

Girls,

You fought with your boyfriend,
And you're in love.

This is celebrated, okay?

Forget ch
on a balcony in Normandy.

I'm going out with a guy.
not Queen. Let's go?

-Yes!
-No!

Ready, sold.

And I'll find a way
in the depressed look of you.

-It's great.
- .

Too square.
"Too bad in between."

Lola is coming.
Lola is coming.

- Let's get you a tidy.
- Come on, come on.

He will stay in Dubai
until friday

-Good Morning.
-Good Morning.

We have a problem
with the hand,

but it will be solved.

What do you think?

It's him?

-Yes.
-No.

-I can not ...
-Yes you can.

"I ..."
- No, not at all.

"Perfect."
"Thank you, Gilles.

There's more.

-Wants to know?
"What?"

I'm tired of having a lock
between the legs!

I'm going to unlock today.

Tonight. It's a challenge.

Now stop drinking, okay?

Think about Marc.

I'm not even there.

Come here.
No. You, no.

Damn it!

I have to find someone.
that you can have sex with me.

Hi.

-Come here.
You're not my type, my dear.

Sophie, that?
a gay nightclub!

Let's test the light.
We started with the breasts.

"Is Lola ready?"
-In 10 minutes.

Okay, 10 minutes.
Fran ois, answer.

Fran ois, answer.

Can I go to the bathroom first?

Use only your right hand.

Hi.

- You mean the model of the hand?
- I'm.

That Cool!

No.

Your hands are sweaty.
disgusting.

You have to relax.

I put botox in the armpits.
So I do not sweat any more, you know?

Has anyone seen the model of the hand?

Wait on
I feel sorry for you.

- What?
- Take it.

Trust me.
You're going to let go.

Cad o cordito
model of the hand?

Sei l.

Tony!

What night!

Wow, what a good feeling!

Let's go.
Everybody blowing.

You're not at all.

-I am fine.
You do not even need to blow.

I'm going to drive.

But you do not have
nor habilitation.

I did not pass the test.
different.

I have 120 hours
of self-school

And, moreover,
I'm not alone anymore.

I have to act
as a responsible adult.

Damn it...
My feet are hurting.

Where do your parents really live?
In Normandy.

Oops ...

For!

Cyril, you can
unlock me

Let's go!

Do not be shy.

Cyril?

Sophie?

I'll close it slowly.

Good.

Push.

Damn it.

For, Jos phine.
Get out of the car.

Jos phine,
Your child will be born.

So shut up
and turn right!

Come on, get closer to him.
Calmly.

There's a phone ringing.

- Come on.
- Get out of here!

I'm not kidding.

There's a phone ringing.

Cad ?

Gilles, Sophie.
Is everything alright?

The bag has burst.
Let's go to Caen's hospital.

I'll give birth.

I'm going to be a father.
Do you have a car, my dear?

It does not.
Who has a car?

Give me a car.
Do you have a car?

-Josphine!
-Caution!

Sir, get on the bike.

Behind him.

-It's all right?
-All.

Breathe, breathe.

"She's going to have the baby!"
-The purse has burst!

I did not take the laxative!

We have time.

There are only two fingers.

I will be back soon.

We'll talk to your doctor.
He sent you his file.

Really? And is it going well?

Knocked

For!

What's up?

I want my phone!

"Did you manage to talk to Gilles?"
-He does not answer.

I think we can start
shortly.

I was thinking...

Do you remember
from last night?

-If I remember?
- .

Are you kidding me?

You persecuted me,

begging
that I might unlock thee.

I slept,
And you took my clothes off.

And now you ask me?

We're six.
The time has come.

No, no.

Hold on.

I do not want to give birth without Gilles.
Cyril! Sophie!

"Not without Gilles!"
"Come with you."

Drop the bed.

-No!
-Can we go with her?

No, just the father.
can accompany it.

We're with you, Jo.
You're the best.

Let's find Gilles,
do not worry

We can not
wait a little?

-I am fine.
-No, the epidural time.

You can go, sir.

Can go.

Thank you.

Gilles.

-I talk with him.
"Why?"

You have company.

Jo!

Sophie,
a long history ...

No, Gilles.
I do not understand anything.

I do not understand anything.
Gilles ...

I do not understand,
Gilles.

Just stop screaming.

Gilles ...
Stop screwing up.

Stop it.
Stay calm. That's it.

Do not want to do this.
in a room?

Thank you.

Gilles ...

Come here.

Hospital of Caen,
room 227.

No need.
I do not feel any contraction.

- I think that was a false alarm.
"Take it easy, ma'am.

That.

- I'm coming, Jo!
-Gilles.

You do not have to worry any more.
I'll take care of everything.

Damn it!

How many times
I have to say

not to leave
the parents see the epidural?

-I know I know.
-What the fuck!

Relax, ma'am.

Bend your back.

I know, I'm going this way,
and we'll see what happens.

Let's go!
Push, push, push!

"Very well, madam.
-Let's go, baby!

You're a warrior!

Again! Again! Do not stop.

Stay calm
or will have to leave.

I am the father!
Do not give me orders!

Get back to work.
Let's go.

- Get him out of here.
-Let's go! Let's go!

-Push!
-Calm.

Forget it, ma'am.
Let's go again.

Here we go.

Continue, continue.
Very well!

Push, push.
A little more.

I see the head.
You want to take her alone?

I do not want to!
Boot to hand inside!

-I want to! I want to!
"I'll show you!"

Calm down, Mrs. Lapierre ...

It's not possible.
Can someone help me?

Come on, lady.
It's almost.

Push, push.

Push, push, let's go.

There he is.
Look at your son.

Wow! He's great.

He's great.

- I think it's on the left.
-No, that one in the background.

same.

I think
the one from the background.

And that little one
right there in the front?

That? No.

He has the abused look
of Jo.

- the second there.
- That one over there.

, but they are
all alike.

They're both here.

Marc and Sophie. Cool!

All right?

Does it hurt?
So much?

-Doe.
-To see that it hurt.

-Hi.
-Hi.

Hi, Jo.

Look at him.

He's cute!

Looks like you.

I could see
who was not him.

Now, yes. it.

my kitten.

this.

In 9 months,
I had to face my mother,

cast out my sister,
irritate Gilles

and become
a responsible adult.

I will come, finally.

Of course there will be
some adjustments,

but, as Gilles would say,

we have a good margin
to improve.

There, boy.

He is called Elliott,
have my eyes

and the father's butt.

Subrip and Sync:
Pix