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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:03,040 ♪ Terrible Tudors Gorgeous Georgians 2 00:00:03,040 --> 00:00:04,240 ♪ Slimy Stuarts, vile Victorians 3 00:00:04,240 --> 00:00:07,120 ♪ Woeful wars, ferocious fights Dingy castles, daring knights 4 00:00:07,120 --> 00:00:08,520 ♪ Horrors that defy description 5 00:00:08,520 --> 00:00:10,040 ♪ Cut-throat Celts, awful Egyptians 6 00:00:10,040 --> 00:00:12,520 ♪ Vicious Vikings, cruel crimes Punishments from ancient times 7 00:00:12,520 --> 00:00:14,000 ♪ Romans, rotten, rank and ruthless 8 00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:15,680 ♪ Cavemen, savage, fierce and toothless 9 00:00:15,680 --> 00:00:18,320 ♪ Groovy Greeks, brainy sages Mean and measly middle ages 10 00:00:18,320 --> 00:00:20,400 ♪ Gory stories, we do that 11 00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:23,160 ♪ And your host, a talking rat 12 00:00:23,160 --> 00:00:26,240 ♪ The past is no longer a mystery 13 00:00:26,240 --> 00:00:27,480 ♪ Welcome to... 14 00:00:27,480 --> 00:00:31,480 ♪ ..Horrible Histories. ♪ 15 00:00:31,480 --> 00:00:34,040 Horrible Histories presents... 16 00:00:35,760 --> 00:00:38,000 SCREAMING 17 00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:41,400 Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha! 18 00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:44,560 VAMPIRE ACCENT: It is I, Count Dracula, 19 00:00:44,560 --> 00:00:47,200 Lord of Transylvania. 20 00:00:47,200 --> 00:00:51,760 You will find me in the darkness and... 21 00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:54,040 NORMAL VOICE: That organ is quite distracting, actually. 22 00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:55,880 Knock it off, Nige. Sorry! 23 00:00:55,880 --> 00:00:58,200 Now, we all love a monster story. 24 00:00:58,200 --> 00:01:01,760 No matter where or when you go, you'll find stories 25 00:01:01,760 --> 00:01:03,960 of strange mythical creatures. 26 00:01:03,960 --> 00:01:06,440 MAGICAL MUSIC Nice ones, like unicorns 27 00:01:06,440 --> 00:01:07,640 and mermaids, 28 00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:08,800 or... THUNDER CRACK 29 00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:11,320 ...nasty ones, like vampires and witches. 30 00:01:11,320 --> 00:01:13,400 WITCH CACKLING From ancient Egypt, 31 00:01:13,400 --> 00:01:15,160 to Tudor England, 32 00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:16,800 to medieval Japan, 33 00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:19,520 there are monsters everywhere. 34 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:22,680 And a few of them might even surprise you. 35 00:01:24,480 --> 00:01:26,640 Collect all your favourite monsters 36 00:01:26,640 --> 00:01:30,240 for Japanese folklore in Historical Pokymonsters - Run! 37 00:01:30,240 --> 00:01:33,720 Featuring monsters from the last 1,000 years of Japanese history. 38 00:01:33,720 --> 00:01:36,920 And when you collect monsters like Gashadokuro - 39 00:01:36,920 --> 00:01:39,360 a terrifying giant skeleton that creeps around at night 40 00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:40,520 crushing people - 41 00:01:40,520 --> 00:01:42,000 you'll want to run! 42 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:43,320 Historical Pokymonsters - Run! 43 00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:46,640 features all the best historical Japanese 44 00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:47,960 monsters for you to collect. 45 00:01:47,960 --> 00:01:50,000 Like Futakuchi-onna, 46 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:51,520 the lady with the extra mouth 47 00:01:51,520 --> 00:01:53,320 in the back of her hair! 48 00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:55,920 Jubokko - who looks like a tree, 49 00:01:55,920 --> 00:01:58,520 but get too close and it will remove all your blood, 50 00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:00,720 and leave your body for the birds to peck at! 51 00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:02,280 Classic Jubokko. 52 00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:04,440 Historical Pokymonsters - Run! 53 00:02:04,440 --> 00:02:06,320 And don't just collect the scary monsters, 54 00:02:06,320 --> 00:02:08,000 collect the weird ones too. 55 00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:09,440 Like Kara-Kasa-Kozo, 56 00:02:09,440 --> 00:02:11,880 the monstrous spirit of a broken umbrella, 57 00:02:11,880 --> 00:02:13,520 with one leg and a long tongue. 58 00:02:13,520 --> 00:02:14,720 He likes licking people 59 00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:15,960 with his long tongue! 60 00:02:15,960 --> 00:02:17,520 No reason. 61 00:02:17,520 --> 00:02:20,480 And you won't be able to take your eyes off the screen, 62 00:02:20,480 --> 00:02:22,480 when you see Bake-Danuki, 63 00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:25,000 the Japanese raccoon-dog with magical powers. 64 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:28,160 There are hundreds of cool, Japanese monsters and spirits 65 00:02:28,160 --> 00:02:30,720 to collect in Historical Pokymonsters - Run! 66 00:02:30,720 --> 00:02:33,240 A game so good, you'll hurt yourself. 67 00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:36,680 Now featuring third generation Pokymonster 68 00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:38,960 Nurikabe, who appears as the wall 69 00:02:38,960 --> 00:02:40,480 you can never get around. 70 00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:42,000 Because, why not?! 71 00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:44,760 Historical Pokymonsters - Run! 72 00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:48,040 Catch them, before THEY catch YOU. 73 00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:50,200 GIRL SCREAMING 74 00:02:50,200 --> 00:02:52,960 Ah, lucky you. 75 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:56,920 You caught sight of one of history's rarest, and, dare I say, 76 00:02:56,920 --> 00:02:59,240 most handsome creatures. 77 00:02:59,240 --> 00:03:02,320 Yes! It's me - Henry VIII. 78 00:03:02,320 --> 00:03:07,080 And though I may be a very real, ABSOLUTE legend, 79 00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:11,160 I was a very big fan of mythical legends too. 80 00:03:13,440 --> 00:03:15,400 Now, I have to warn you, Your Majesty, 81 00:03:15,400 --> 00:03:17,080 your husband, King Henry, 82 00:03:17,080 --> 00:03:18,560 is planning a surprise. 83 00:03:18,560 --> 00:03:20,760 Ooh! I love presents. 84 00:03:20,760 --> 00:03:24,160 Ah, yes, we all love presents, Queen Catherine, 85 00:03:24,160 --> 00:03:26,200 but this is more likely to be... 86 00:03:26,200 --> 00:03:28,040 GRUFF VOICE: Ha-ha-ha. Stand and deliver! 87 00:03:28,040 --> 00:03:30,480 Stand and deliver. Stand and deliver. 88 00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:33,600 Oh! Gertrude, Margaret - we are being ambushed. 89 00:03:33,600 --> 00:03:35,840 I am Robin Hood. 90 00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:38,120 Oh, they have us surrounded! Call the King. 91 00:03:38,120 --> 00:03:40,040 It IS the King, Your Majesty. 92 00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:43,120 {\an8}I'm not the King. ACCENT CHANGING: I'm not the King, I'm Robin Hood. 93 00:03:43,120 --> 00:03:45,440 Robin who? No, not... Robin Hood. 94 00:03:45,440 --> 00:03:46,960 Robin HOOT? 95 00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:48,320 What, like an owl? HOOTING 96 00:03:48,320 --> 00:03:50,720 It is your husband, ma'am. We have to play along. 97 00:03:50,720 --> 00:03:52,760 Why is he pretending to be an owl? 98 00:03:52,760 --> 00:03:55,960 He's not. He's pretending to be some mythical bloke from Nottingham, 99 00:03:55,960 --> 00:03:57,760 who hopped about in tights. 100 00:03:57,760 --> 00:03:58,880 It's an English thing. 101 00:03:58,880 --> 00:04:00,040 Ladies, when you've quite finished. 102 00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:02,400 Yeah? There's sort of a whole thing going on here. 103 00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:05,040 A lot of people gave up their afternoons. So... OK. 104 00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:08,560 Help! Help! Better. 105 00:04:08,560 --> 00:04:11,840 Who will save us from Mr Robin... 106 00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:13,600 Wearing it on my head! ..hat. 107 00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:15,400 Hood! Sorry. 108 00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:19,240 GARBLED ACCENT: Ladies, we must away back to Sherwood Forest. 109 00:04:19,240 --> 00:04:20,640 Good times. 110 00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:23,400 Er, must you leave? NORMAL VOICE: Yeah, I really have to go. 111 00:04:23,400 --> 00:04:25,800 These tights are so itchy and they're riding me raw! 112 00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:28,520 But you cannot leave without a kiss. Ha. 113 00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:34,440 Hang on, ain't you married? Yes. How I wish he was here now. 114 00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:36,400 LAUGHING: He is here! 115 00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:40,600 LADIES IN WAITING: Oh! Tis I - your husband - Henry VIII. 116 00:04:40,600 --> 00:04:42,160 No, I know. We get it. 117 00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:43,560 Yeah, I'm not Robin Hood. 118 00:04:43,560 --> 00:04:45,200 You totes believed I was him. 119 00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:48,160 EXAGGERATEDLY: Oh, no! Who are these large and handsome... 120 00:04:48,160 --> 00:04:49,560 No, we've done that now. 121 00:04:49,560 --> 00:04:50,960 Right, ladies. 122 00:04:50,960 --> 00:04:53,480 We shall meet again in the wild wood, 123 00:04:53,480 --> 00:04:55,680 wherever me arrow doth fall. 124 00:04:55,680 --> 00:04:57,960 ARROW TWANGS SCREAMING OUTSIDE 125 00:04:57,960 --> 00:04:59,440 Sorry, Simon. 126 00:04:59,440 --> 00:05:00,920 Ladies. 127 00:05:00,920 --> 00:05:03,120 KING AND MEN CHEERING 128 00:05:05,360 --> 00:05:08,200 Do they do this sort of thing much? 129 00:05:08,200 --> 00:05:10,120 Way too often. 130 00:05:13,800 --> 00:05:17,280 One of history's greatest and most noble rulers comes to life. 131 00:05:17,280 --> 00:05:19,880 It's 500 AD, 132 00:05:19,880 --> 00:05:21,920 the time of King Arthur, 133 00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:23,960 the English legend. 134 00:05:23,960 --> 00:05:27,360 I shall unite this land. CHEERING 135 00:05:27,360 --> 00:05:30,520 But he might actually have been Welsh. 136 00:05:30,520 --> 00:05:33,000 WELSH ACCENT: Come on, boyos. 137 00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:35,640 let's win this mingin' battle. 138 00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:38,480 Er, some people think he was French. 139 00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:44,800 FRENCH ACCENT: Uh, zis will be our day, mes amis. Oh-hoh-hoh-hoh. 140 00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:47,680 While others say he was a Roman general. Uh... 141 00:05:49,920 --> 00:05:53,160 ITALIAN ACCENT: With this-a holy grail-a, the cuppa-Jesus-a, 142 00:05:53,160 --> 00:05:57,120 I will have eternal life and I will look-a this hot forever! 143 00:05:57,120 --> 00:05:59,640 Or he could have been from Romania. 144 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:01,560 {\an8}ENGLISH ACCENT: What?! I mean, am I not... 145 00:06:01,560 --> 00:06:03,280 {\an8}I'm not even going to try that. 146 00:06:03,280 --> 00:06:06,320 With my sword Excalibur, 147 00:06:06,320 --> 00:06:09,960 I shall crush my enemies in a frenzy of blood. 148 00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:13,280 No, you won't. Excalibur was made up too. 149 00:06:13,280 --> 00:06:15,720 But I will not do it alone. Yes, you will. 150 00:06:15,720 --> 00:06:18,160 It seems Guinevere and The Knights Of The Round Table 151 00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:19,800 didn't exist either. 152 00:06:19,800 --> 00:06:21,360 Well, what DO we know? 153 00:06:21,360 --> 00:06:25,080 {\an8}The legend of King Arthur, 154 00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:27,680 {\an8}who we know, may not have existed at all! 155 00:06:27,680 --> 00:06:29,960 What?! No... 156 00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:37,440 Oh, you've caught me doing my facial. 157 00:06:37,440 --> 00:06:38,520 What? 158 00:06:38,520 --> 00:06:42,000 People are painting me, like, all the time, so I have to look my best. 159 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:45,520 But what special ingredient do I use in my ointments and balms? 160 00:06:53,280 --> 00:06:55,440 The answer is C - unicorn horn. 161 00:06:55,440 --> 00:06:57,120 Only the finest ingredients 162 00:06:57,120 --> 00:06:58,920 go on this kingly body. 163 00:06:58,920 --> 00:07:01,280 Of course, some people say unicorns aren't real, 164 00:07:01,280 --> 00:07:03,400 and it's really the horn from a narwhal, 165 00:07:03,400 --> 00:07:05,200 which is sort of a whale. 166 00:07:05,200 --> 00:07:07,120 But I say... BLOWS RASPBERRY 167 00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:08,600 Just because you haven't see something, 168 00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:10,360 doesn't mean you shouldn't believe in it. 169 00:07:10,360 --> 00:07:13,000 I've not seen my perfect wife, yet, 170 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:15,840 but I still believe I might find one, eventually. 171 00:07:15,840 --> 00:07:17,000 Speaking of which, 172 00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:18,080 leave me in peace. 173 00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:20,360 I've got to keep this on for another ten minutes, 174 00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:21,920 then I'm off on a date. 175 00:07:23,720 --> 00:07:26,240 Please, let this one be my unicorn. 176 00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:31,360 You know, during the reign of the Tudor king Henry VIII, 177 00:07:31,360 --> 00:07:33,560 being a queen could be a risky business. 178 00:07:33,560 --> 00:07:36,840 But during the reign of my Stuart king - James I, 179 00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:39,400 being any kind of woman was risky. 180 00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:41,880 He was also obsessed with witches, 181 00:07:41,880 --> 00:07:43,520 and if you were a woman, 182 00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:46,440 it didn't take much for him to accuse you of being one, 183 00:07:46,440 --> 00:07:47,760 which was ridiculous. 184 00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:49,360 Anyway, must be off. 185 00:07:49,360 --> 00:07:51,520 CACKLING LAUGHTER 186 00:07:51,520 --> 00:07:54,080 {\an8}This is Jimmy On The Street. 187 00:07:54,080 --> 00:07:57,040 {\an8}I'm King James I, or Jimmy VI, if you're Scottish, 188 00:07:57,040 --> 00:07:58,760 {\an8}and I am your host and 189 00:07:58,760 --> 00:08:02,120 I know all about the worst threat to our society - 190 00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:03,720 wicked witches! 191 00:08:03,720 --> 00:08:04,920 But don't worry, 192 00:08:04,920 --> 00:08:08,000 because I literally wrote the book on how to spot them. 193 00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:09,720 Let's get witch-hunting. 194 00:08:09,720 --> 00:08:10,880 {\an8}William Shakespeare, 195 00:08:10,880 --> 00:08:13,120 {\an8}get ready to ring the witch bell. 196 00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:14,920 Are you sure this is absolutely necessary? 197 00:08:14,920 --> 00:08:17,520 Yes, it is. He knows all about witches, too, you know. 198 00:08:17,520 --> 00:08:20,320 He just added a bunch of witches to his new play Macbeth. 199 00:08:20,320 --> 00:08:23,200 "Secret, evil, midnight hag." That was my favourite bit. 200 00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:25,280 Yeah, well, I though it might have been. 201 00:08:25,280 --> 00:08:28,080 Not that we added them to keep you happy, or anything. 202 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:31,320 Let's go! 203 00:08:35,040 --> 00:08:36,480 Women! Are you witches? 204 00:08:36,480 --> 00:08:40,920 No. Oh, how convenient! Just what a witch would say. 205 00:08:40,920 --> 00:08:43,120 Have you got the witch's mark? What's a witch's mark? 206 00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:45,640 Well, it's all in the book. Do none of you read? 207 00:08:45,640 --> 00:08:48,600 Have you got a birth mark? No. A mole? No. 208 00:08:48,600 --> 00:08:50,520 Freckles? Oh, I have got freckles. 209 00:08:50,520 --> 00:08:51,960 Oh, you've got freckles. 210 00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:54,760 Yay, yay, yay! Witch! Ring the witch bell, Shakey. 211 00:08:54,760 --> 00:08:55,920 All right. Sorry. 212 00:08:55,920 --> 00:08:57,480 BELL RINGING 213 00:08:57,480 --> 00:08:59,520 Whoa, whoa! Woman! Are you a witch? 214 00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:00,760 Er, I'm a man. 215 00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:02,480 Men can be witches too, you know. 216 00:09:02,480 --> 00:09:05,320 There's just less of them, because the Devil prefers frail women. 217 00:09:05,320 --> 00:09:06,480 Write that down, Shakey. 218 00:09:06,480 --> 00:09:07,880 Come on! Women, 219 00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:09,280 be ye witches? 220 00:09:09,280 --> 00:09:11,680 No. Well, come on, there's three of you. 221 00:09:11,680 --> 00:09:14,560 Shakespeare wrote witches come in threes. Didn't you, Willy? 222 00:09:14,560 --> 00:09:16,320 Yes, in a play... JIMMY GASPS 223 00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:20,320 Ohhhh, are you the hags that tried to sink my wee wife's boat? 224 00:09:20,320 --> 00:09:23,600 {\an8}Ha! Are ya? Witch! Ring the witch bell, Shakey. 225 00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:25,800 BELL RINGING 226 00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:27,200 I miss Queen Elizabeth. 227 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:28,640 Witch! 228 00:09:31,560 --> 00:09:32,800 Like King James, 229 00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:35,680 I've got some solid advice on how to deal with witches. 230 00:09:35,680 --> 00:09:40,000 SHOUTING: Just run away. Scream your head off. Aaaaaargh! 231 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:42,240 LAUGHING DEMONIACALLY 232 00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:43,720 In fact, throughout history, 233 00:09:43,720 --> 00:09:45,480 lots of people have offered advice on 234 00:09:45,480 --> 00:09:48,240 what to do if you DID bump into a mythical creature. 235 00:09:48,240 --> 00:09:50,160 You might want to take notes. 236 00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:55,320 Guys, we really want to stay safe on this raid. 237 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:59,080 So, here are some self-defence tips that may help. 238 00:09:59,080 --> 00:10:01,800 Ah, hey, we'll just be fighting a bunch of monks, 239 00:10:01,800 --> 00:10:03,920 bash them on the head and steal their gold. 240 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:06,040 SWORDS CLANK VIKINGS GROWL 241 00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:08,320 Hm. So Frida, picture this... 242 00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:12,120 ...the longboats arrived on an island. It is dark and cold. 243 00:10:12,120 --> 00:10:13,320 What do you do? 244 00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:15,200 Easy. Leap on to the shore 245 00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:17,760 and form a shield wall. VIKINGS: Shield wall! Huh! 246 00:10:17,760 --> 00:10:21,880 Then light a fire till morning. OK. Great. 247 00:10:21,880 --> 00:10:24,640 The island drags you under the water and eats you! 248 00:10:24,640 --> 00:10:27,240 It's not an island, it's a Lyngbakr! 249 00:10:27,240 --> 00:10:29,720 You woke it with the fire. A Lyngbak-what-er? 250 00:10:29,720 --> 00:10:32,120 It's a sea monster. You should know this. 251 00:10:32,120 --> 00:10:34,120 I want another go. 252 00:10:34,120 --> 00:10:36,560 OK, fine, Frida. You're on the boat, 253 00:10:36,560 --> 00:10:37,800 you see a rocky island... 254 00:10:37,800 --> 00:10:41,280 I...stay on the boat? 255 00:10:41,280 --> 00:10:43,840 Good. The island sinks. Yes! Safe. 256 00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:45,560 Then it explodes out of the water 257 00:10:45,560 --> 00:10:47,440 with its mouth, eating you and the boat. 258 00:10:47,440 --> 00:10:48,520 Bad luck. 259 00:10:48,520 --> 00:10:50,760 The rocky island was a nose of a hafgufa. 260 00:10:50,760 --> 00:10:51,840 Ah, man. 261 00:10:51,840 --> 00:10:54,360 Blooming hafugufsen-lynkalynks! 262 00:10:54,360 --> 00:10:57,840 The trick to hafgufas is to row for your life when you see an island. 263 00:10:57,840 --> 00:11:01,520 Can I ask, is going on this raid compulsory? 264 00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:04,440 I mean, I could stay home and look after the sheep. 265 00:11:04,440 --> 00:11:06,720 BAAING It's a very important job, actually. 266 00:11:06,720 --> 00:11:08,240 Way to get picked, Bjorn. 267 00:11:08,240 --> 00:11:10,640 You meet a giant. What do you do? 268 00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:12,200 Uh, take no chances. 269 00:11:12,200 --> 00:11:13,640 I attack him with my sword. 270 00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:14,760 Nope. 271 00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:18,320 Um, smash him with my shield? 272 00:11:18,320 --> 00:11:20,560 No, no, no. 273 00:11:20,560 --> 00:11:22,120 Shield wall? VIKINGS: Shield wall! 274 00:11:22,120 --> 00:11:27,120 You can't just say, "Shield wall." You're just guessing now. 275 00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,200 OK. I have no idea. 276 00:11:29,200 --> 00:11:33,240 Ha! I might as well dress up as Thor and try to scare him off. 277 00:11:33,240 --> 00:11:37,480 Well done. Mokkurkalfi is the clay giant that is very scared of Thor. 278 00:11:37,480 --> 00:11:40,280 SCREAMING It was a total guess. 279 00:11:40,280 --> 00:11:42,640 Are all these real monsters? Yes. 280 00:11:42,640 --> 00:11:45,520 They're mentioned in the sagas, so they must be real. 281 00:11:45,520 --> 00:11:49,240 OK, a man approaches in a grey hood, holding a book, 282 00:11:49,240 --> 00:11:51,280 he's mysterious and small. 283 00:11:51,280 --> 00:11:53,520 What do you do? I run for my life. 284 00:11:53,520 --> 00:11:54,880 Why are you running? 285 00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:58,200 This one is just a monk with a bible. I tricked you! Oh. 286 00:11:58,200 --> 00:12:00,880 Honestly, it's very hard to win in this game. 287 00:12:00,880 --> 00:12:02,560 You should also look out for 288 00:12:02,560 --> 00:12:04,280 {\an8}trolls, dwarves, 289 00:12:04,280 --> 00:12:05,760 {\an8}Jormungandr the serpent, 290 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:08,200 {\an8}the Fenris wolf that can eat the moon, 291 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:11,120 {\an8}and Hel - the little girl slash corpse monster. 292 00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:14,320 Any questions? No! THEY SCREAM 293 00:12:14,320 --> 00:12:17,040 Guys, you can't skip the safety class. 294 00:12:17,040 --> 00:12:18,280 It's really important. 295 00:12:18,280 --> 00:12:21,080 Argh! It's Hel, the little girl monster. 296 00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:22,920 Shield wall! Shield wall! 297 00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:25,480 Dad, Mum says it's dinner time. 298 00:12:25,480 --> 00:12:28,320 SHE SIGHS Parents are so embarrassing. 299 00:12:31,800 --> 00:12:35,480 Next up, we are thrilled to have some real life 300 00:12:35,480 --> 00:12:38,400 historical ghostbusters with us in the studio. 301 00:12:38,400 --> 00:12:42,320 First up, it's Rie-Aie, a priest from ancient Egypt. 302 00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:44,960 HE SCREAMS A ghost! 303 00:12:44,960 --> 00:12:46,360 Where did he come from? 304 00:12:46,360 --> 00:12:48,080 I just came in from over there. 305 00:12:48,080 --> 00:12:52,920 So, Rie-Aie, why don't you show us some of your ancient Egyptian 306 00:12:52,920 --> 00:12:54,560 ghostbusting methods? 307 00:12:54,560 --> 00:12:58,080 Absolutely. We could cover ourselves in honey. 308 00:12:58,080 --> 00:12:59,320 Demons hate honey. 309 00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:00,680 Uh, no. I'm fine. 310 00:13:00,680 --> 00:13:02,720 Mate, I'm fine. Honestly, I am fine. 311 00:13:02,720 --> 00:13:03,760 Tell us, 312 00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:06,480 what's it like to live in a fire station? 313 00:13:06,480 --> 00:13:09,240 LAUGHING: Oh, no, no - that's the film. That's not real. 314 00:13:09,240 --> 00:13:12,560 This is a REAL ghostbuster 315 00:13:12,560 --> 00:13:14,040 from ancient Egypt. 316 00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:15,800 Technically, a demon hunter. 317 00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:17,800 Whatever. You're a serious professional. 318 00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:19,240 Extremely serious. 319 00:13:19,240 --> 00:13:23,800 Now, who wants to lure the demons out by spreading poo on their bum? 320 00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:25,720 Well, if you think it will help. 321 00:13:25,720 --> 00:13:29,800 OK, I think that might be a good time to say, "Goodbye," 322 00:13:29,800 --> 00:13:31,360 to Rie-Aie, 323 00:13:31,360 --> 00:13:33,480 and bring in our next guest. 324 00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:36,240 He is a Fangxiangshi, 325 00:13:36,240 --> 00:13:40,520 an official 3rd century, Chinese, Hang dynasty ghostbuster. 326 00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:42,720 HE SHRIEKS A ghost! 327 00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:44,080 Where did you come from? 328 00:13:45,160 --> 00:13:46,680 Over there. 329 00:13:46,680 --> 00:13:49,920 Oh. Doesn't that outfit get in the way of your proton pack? 330 00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:51,760 "Don't cross the streams!" 331 00:13:51,760 --> 00:13:53,320 Again, that's the film. 332 00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:56,200 This is a real historical ghostbuster. 333 00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:58,440 Exactly. Although, 334 00:13:58,440 --> 00:13:59,680 I don't work alone. 335 00:13:59,680 --> 00:14:03,520 I have a small team of mediums, diviners, apprentices, 336 00:14:03,520 --> 00:14:06,840 accountants, scribes, labourers and runners. 337 00:14:06,840 --> 00:14:11,040 Plus, I sometimes use 10,000 boys with bows and arrows. 338 00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:12,200 Oh. Let me show you. 339 00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:13,800 Hang on a minute, 340 00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:15,240 can you see with that on? 341 00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:17,600 Nah, it's important the arrows are fired randomly. 342 00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:18,680 Here we go. Ooh. 343 00:14:18,680 --> 00:14:20,280 No! No. You've got to be kidding. 344 00:14:24,720 --> 00:14:26,560 Hello - and don't worry, 345 00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:28,160 nothing to be afraid of. 346 00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:30,880 Though there's plenty of myths about us mummies 347 00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:33,400 coming back from the dead to haunt the living, 348 00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:36,760 we're teddy bears, really, underneath all this wrapping. 349 00:14:36,760 --> 00:14:41,040 Us ancient Egyptians, we're a superstitious bunch, you see. 350 00:14:41,040 --> 00:14:43,480 Some of us even believe that crocodiles 351 00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:45,360 were the earthly representative 352 00:14:45,360 --> 00:14:47,560 of the god Sobek. 353 00:14:47,560 --> 00:14:51,680 That meant we were extra nice to any crocs we came across. 354 00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:54,880 Hi, guys, and welcome to... 355 00:14:54,880 --> 00:14:57,080 BOTH: ..One Stop Croc... 356 00:14:57,080 --> 00:14:59,360 ...the channel dedicated to the worship 357 00:14:59,360 --> 00:15:01,520 of the crocodile god Sobek. 358 00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:04,480 The immortal half-man, half-crocodile. 359 00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:08,360 That's why we're extra nice to all actual crocodiles. 360 00:15:08,360 --> 00:15:09,960 Like this tame guy, here. 361 00:15:09,960 --> 00:15:12,200 We call him Lil Sobek. CROCODILE GROWLING 362 00:15:12,200 --> 00:15:14,760 He's one of Sobek's representatives on Earth. 363 00:15:14,760 --> 00:15:17,080 Ooh, who's a good little representative of Sobek 364 00:15:17,080 --> 00:15:19,880 on Earth? Cute little representative, yes you are! 365 00:15:19,880 --> 00:15:21,680 So, how do we worship him? 366 00:15:21,680 --> 00:15:22,880 We're going to teach you 367 00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:25,240 with today's tutorial. 368 00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:26,280 Sobek your self, 369 00:15:26,280 --> 00:15:28,840 before ya wreck urself. 370 00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:31,200 Step One - jewellery. 371 00:15:31,200 --> 00:15:33,360 How much is too much? 372 00:15:34,680 --> 00:15:36,360 You can never have too much. 373 00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:39,480 So, croc-a-dial... CHEERING 374 00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:40,880 ...it up to 11. 375 00:15:40,880 --> 00:15:46,240 Ooh, Lil Sobek looks so fine. So fiiiiiine. 376 00:15:46,240 --> 00:15:47,280 Step Two. 377 00:15:48,760 --> 00:15:52,000 What should you feed your croc to keep Sobek the god happy? 378 00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:55,600 In the wild crocodiles eat... Birds, fish, bugs. 379 00:15:55,600 --> 00:15:57,400 But we like to feed our crocodiles 380 00:15:57,400 --> 00:15:59,560 cake, bread and wine. 381 00:15:59,560 --> 00:16:01,840 Step Three. 382 00:16:03,080 --> 00:16:05,080 Crocodiles may act tame, 383 00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:06,720 but always remember, 384 00:16:06,720 --> 00:16:09,600 these are unpredictable animals. 385 00:16:09,600 --> 00:16:12,840 In the wild, they can grab you in their giant jaws 386 00:16:12,840 --> 00:16:14,360 and drag you into the river. 387 00:16:14,360 --> 00:16:16,160 What do you do if that happens? 388 00:16:16,160 --> 00:16:19,040 BOTH: Celebrate! 389 00:16:19,040 --> 00:16:24,560 Congratulations. You have just become a minor god. 390 00:16:24,560 --> 00:16:26,400 Getting dragged away by a crocodile 391 00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:28,520 means that your body is blessed. 392 00:16:28,520 --> 00:16:31,960 You'll be a semi-deity faster than you can say, 393 00:16:31,960 --> 00:16:35,960 "See you later, alli... arghhhh!" 394 00:16:35,960 --> 00:16:38,560 Hooray. I'm going to be a demi-god. 395 00:16:38,560 --> 00:16:43,240 APPLAUSE I'm going to die. 396 00:16:43,240 --> 00:16:44,760 You go, girl! 397 00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:51,920 You know, we rats can be very superstitious creatures, too? 398 00:16:51,920 --> 00:16:55,320 I never walk underneath the toilet when the seat's up, 399 00:16:55,320 --> 00:16:58,280 and I've always been nervous about the number 13, 400 00:16:58,280 --> 00:17:03,360 ever since I ate 13 suspicious sausages and got rather unwell. 401 00:17:03,360 --> 00:17:06,160 TUMMY GRUMBLES 402 00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:10,360 Oh! Of course, people have been superstitious throughout history. 403 00:17:10,360 --> 00:17:12,920 Perhaps the most superstitious of the lot 404 00:17:12,920 --> 00:17:14,760 were the sailors. 405 00:17:14,760 --> 00:17:16,840 FARTING 406 00:17:16,840 --> 00:17:19,040 Ooh. 407 00:17:21,360 --> 00:17:23,640 HORNPIPE MUSIC PLAYS 408 00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:26,400 Hello, sir. I was told you're the man to talk to 409 00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,920 if I wanted to get a job aboard this fine ship. 410 00:17:28,920 --> 00:17:30,320 Yeah. And who might you be? 411 00:17:30,320 --> 00:17:32,760 I'm Jonah, sir. Jonah! THUNDERBOLT STRIKES 412 00:17:32,760 --> 00:17:34,640 That's a terrible name for a sailor. 413 00:17:34,640 --> 00:17:36,960 Jonahs bring awful bad luck. 414 00:17:36,960 --> 00:17:39,760 The ship could sink with a Jonah on board. 415 00:17:39,760 --> 00:17:41,600 HE WHISTLES And no whistling! 416 00:17:41,600 --> 00:17:43,480 Whistling's bad luck for a ship, an' all. 417 00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:45,040 I promise not to whistle, then. 418 00:17:45,040 --> 00:17:46,240 SLIPPING SAILOR: ...water on deck! 419 00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:48,680 Please give me a job. I want to travel the oceans. 420 00:17:48,680 --> 00:17:49,960 HE LAUGHS I'm strong. Yeah. 421 00:17:49,960 --> 00:17:51,560 I'm good with rope. Right. 422 00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:53,240 I can swim. SWIM! 423 00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:55,280 A good sailor doesn't know how to swim. 424 00:17:55,280 --> 00:17:57,920 If you fall in - that's it - the ocean's taken you. 425 00:17:57,920 --> 00:18:00,080 No point in trying to swim. Really? Yeah. 426 00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:02,400 NEXT SAILOR: Are you all right down there, Daaaaave! 427 00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:04,520 And there'll be no bananas on board! 428 00:18:04,520 --> 00:18:06,240 SAILOR: Owww! 429 00:18:06,240 --> 00:18:08,600 Please give me a chance. I don't know, mate. 430 00:18:08,600 --> 00:18:10,840 A lot of red flags here for me. 431 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:12,520 Everything you're doing is bad luck. 432 00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:15,480 Plus, it was a red sunrise this morning - bad omen. 433 00:18:15,480 --> 00:18:16,840 And it's Friday - 434 00:18:16,840 --> 00:18:18,160 unluckiest day of the week. 435 00:18:18,160 --> 00:18:20,880 Ow, which idiot threw that banana?! 436 00:18:20,880 --> 00:18:22,960 Unluckiest ship ever. I quit. 437 00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:25,600 Well, on the other hand, it appears we have some vacancies. 438 00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:28,320 Please, sir. Yeah, all right, you got the job. 439 00:18:28,320 --> 00:18:32,200 But heed my warning, you have to pay attention to these superstitions. 440 00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:35,160 Right. It's how we stay safe at sea... Argh! 441 00:18:35,160 --> 00:18:38,480 Ooh. Man overboard. SPLASHING 442 00:18:38,480 --> 00:18:40,760 Ooh, there's sharks in here! 443 00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:43,840 Good job you can't swim, or that would be bad luck, wouldn't it? 444 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:49,920 {\an8}UPBEAT ADVERT MUSIC 445 00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:51,400 I'm Pliny the Elder - 446 00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:54,600 author, philosopher and all-round great guy. 447 00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:56,560 And according to Roman superstition, 448 00:18:56,560 --> 00:19:00,320 spitting is a simple, effective cure for curses. 449 00:19:00,320 --> 00:19:02,240 SPITTING 450 00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:04,560 Is there a new baby in your family, 451 00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:07,040 and you don't want anyone to curse it? 452 00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:10,400 Simply spit on the ground three times, like this... 453 00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:13,520 BABY CRYING 454 00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:15,080 You spat on my baby. 455 00:19:18,840 --> 00:19:21,120 You're revolting. And you're welcome. 456 00:19:23,280 --> 00:19:25,520 BUZZING 457 00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:27,680 Have you got an insect in your ear? 458 00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:29,320 Well, not any more. 459 00:19:29,320 --> 00:19:31,520 Simply get someone to flob in your ear, 460 00:19:31,520 --> 00:19:33,880 and the insect will leave. 461 00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:36,760 BUZZING 462 00:19:36,760 --> 00:19:41,400 Or drown. 463 00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:46,080 Did you know that spitting in the mouth of a snake 464 00:19:46,080 --> 00:19:47,840 can cause it to explode? 465 00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:49,400 It's worth a try. 466 00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:54,680 SPITTING Arghhhhhh! 467 00:19:57,320 --> 00:19:59,720 Not the beard! Please, not the beard. 468 00:20:05,400 --> 00:20:09,440 You know, the Romans had a lot of great ideas, 469 00:20:09,440 --> 00:20:12,120 but that was not one of them. 470 00:20:12,120 --> 00:20:15,840 Actually, a lot of the most famous myths and monsters 471 00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:17,880 have come from famous authors. 472 00:20:17,880 --> 00:20:21,720 But their original stories were sometimes a little different 473 00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:23,320 to the versions we now know. 474 00:20:23,320 --> 00:20:25,800 And though their work is celebrated today, 475 00:20:25,800 --> 00:20:29,320 this wasn't always the case when it first came out. 476 00:20:30,320 --> 00:20:32,440 Hello, I'm Mary Shelley 477 00:20:32,440 --> 00:20:34,560 and I wrote the famous book Frankenstein, 478 00:20:34,560 --> 00:20:36,800 about a scientist who made a monster. 479 00:20:36,800 --> 00:20:39,520 These are some of the actual reviews 480 00:20:39,520 --> 00:20:42,120 that came out around the time that I wrote the book. 481 00:20:42,120 --> 00:20:44,840 I hope they don't use the word "Genius" too much! 482 00:20:44,840 --> 00:20:50,480 OK, so... "Frankenstein was... horrible and disgusting." 483 00:20:50,480 --> 00:20:53,320 Oh, well. I guess there's always one. 484 00:20:53,320 --> 00:20:55,920 "Gross inconsistencies." 485 00:20:55,920 --> 00:20:58,000 I suppose... there's always two. 486 00:20:58,000 --> 00:21:01,240 "Taste and judgement revolt at this kind of writing." 487 00:21:01,240 --> 00:21:04,160 Oh, well, this one's just a list of insults... 488 00:21:04,160 --> 00:21:06,000 "Plum. Massive turnip. Milk..." 489 00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:08,800 Oh, no, no, no... Sorry, that's my shopping list. 490 00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:10,960 Oh, no, no - here's a good one... 491 00:21:16,480 --> 00:21:17,840 Wait - "his"! 492 00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:20,240 Why do they think Frankenstein was written by a man? 493 00:21:20,240 --> 00:21:22,240 I mean, I suppose I should be grateful 494 00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:25,440 that they're not having a go at me for being a female writer. 495 00:21:30,240 --> 00:21:32,040 I knew this was a bad idea. 496 00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:34,120 You know what you can do with your reviews? 497 00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:38,800 I, er, forgot my shopping lists. 498 00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:42,080 It's story-telling week, 499 00:21:42,080 --> 00:21:44,800 and head teacher Mrs Thomas needs a new English teacher, 500 00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:46,800 because it turns out Mr Lewis 501 00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:48,640 was very good at telling stories 502 00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:50,800 about his qualifications. 503 00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:53,680 Welcome to Historical Educating. 504 00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:56,840 I can't believe it. 505 00:21:56,840 --> 00:22:00,600 I've only got Denmark's most famous author to fill in. 506 00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:03,080 Every kid in the school will know his stories. 507 00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:05,400 I mean, half of them have been turned into 508 00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:06,880 massive blockbuster movies. 509 00:22:06,880 --> 00:22:12,360 My name is Mr Hans Christian Andersen. 510 00:22:12,360 --> 00:22:14,680 IMITATES TROMBONE 511 00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:15,880 Ah... 512 00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:18,200 Now, who knows any of my brilliant stories? 513 00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:23,480 Ah! I love the film The Little Mermaid, Mr Andersen. 514 00:22:23,480 --> 00:22:27,240 Ah-ha-ha-haaaa-ha-ha-ha! 515 00:22:27,240 --> 00:22:29,080 That film is terrible. 516 00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:31,240 When Mr Andersen talked about the film, 517 00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:33,200 he used some very rude sounding words. 518 00:22:33,200 --> 00:22:34,680 He said they were just Danish, 519 00:22:34,680 --> 00:22:37,360 but I think they might have been Danish and rude. 520 00:22:37,360 --> 00:22:40,320 So, in my original version of the story, 521 00:22:40,320 --> 00:22:43,840 the little mermaid falls in love with the prince 522 00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:46,320 after she saves him from drowning. 523 00:22:46,320 --> 00:22:49,160 She then goes to ask the sea witch... Ursula? 524 00:22:49,160 --> 00:22:51,840 Bless you. ..to turn her into a human. 525 00:22:51,840 --> 00:22:55,440 We meet the sea witch while a toad is eating out of her mouth. 526 00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:58,960 CHILDREN: Eurgh. 527 00:22:58,960 --> 00:23:01,760 So, the sea witch gives the little mermaid 528 00:23:01,760 --> 00:23:04,320 her legs, but the transformation 529 00:23:04,320 --> 00:23:06,480 feels like she's being murdered, 530 00:23:06,480 --> 00:23:09,280 and every step that she takes on her new legs 531 00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:11,440 is like walking on knives. 532 00:23:11,440 --> 00:23:13,640 Why hasn't the film got a song about that? 533 00:23:13,640 --> 00:23:15,920 I don't think there are any singing lobsters 534 00:23:15,920 --> 00:23:17,640 in Mr Andersen's original story. 535 00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:20,560 Just endless horror. 536 00:23:20,560 --> 00:23:23,520 So, in payment for being so helpful, 537 00:23:23,520 --> 00:23:26,920 the witch cuts out the mermaid's tongue. 538 00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:29,360 No more talking for the little mermaid. 539 00:23:29,360 --> 00:23:32,160 We've had a couple of traumatised children 540 00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:34,280 report to pastoral. 541 00:23:34,280 --> 00:23:36,120 I just need to check Mr Andersen's 542 00:23:36,120 --> 00:23:38,280 original version of The Little Mermaid. 543 00:23:38,280 --> 00:23:39,360 I'm sure it's fine. 544 00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:45,360 Oh, no, no, no, no, no! 545 00:23:45,360 --> 00:23:47,240 Can we just read something else? 546 00:23:47,240 --> 00:23:49,360 Isn't Frozen based on your book The Snow Queen? 547 00:23:49,360 --> 00:23:51,160 Ah, The Snow Queen, yes. 548 00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:54,240 I will read the section where one of the characters 549 00:23:54,240 --> 00:23:57,120 gets poked in the eye with a shard of glass. 550 00:23:57,120 --> 00:23:59,640 Step away from the book! 551 00:23:59,640 --> 00:24:02,960 Mr Andersen has left us, 552 00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:05,040 and we've offered the children counselling. 553 00:24:05,040 --> 00:24:09,320 But I don't know if any of them will ever sleep again. 554 00:24:10,840 --> 00:24:13,520 Hello, Mary Shelley here again, 555 00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:15,440 author of Frankenstein. 556 00:24:15,440 --> 00:24:18,040 But I wasn't the only writer in the family. 557 00:24:18,040 --> 00:24:21,840 My husband Percy Bysshe Shelley was a great poet, 558 00:24:21,840 --> 00:24:23,640 may he rest in peace. 559 00:24:23,640 --> 00:24:25,000 Speaking of which, 560 00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:28,960 what part of my husband's body did I keep after he died? 561 00:24:35,840 --> 00:24:39,600 The answer is C - his heart, of course. 562 00:24:39,600 --> 00:24:42,480 Keeping his toenails would have been so gross. 563 00:24:42,480 --> 00:24:44,640 Thanks, Mary. 564 00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:47,480 Nothing creepy about THAT whatsoever. 565 00:24:47,480 --> 00:24:50,680 Mehhhh. There's just time before the clock strikes 13 - 566 00:24:50,680 --> 00:24:53,760 CLOCK CHIMES OUT OF TUNE I really must get that mended - 567 00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:57,040 to tell you about some of the greatest monsters of all time. 568 00:24:57,040 --> 00:25:00,280 In fact, why don't I let them tell us themselves? 569 00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:02,000 Ladies and gentlemen, 570 00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:04,400 the scariest boy band around. 571 00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:10,080 VAMPIRE ACCENT: And now I must take flight. Goodbye! 572 00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:12,880 FLAPPING 573 00:25:12,880 --> 00:25:15,120 NORMAL VOICE: Yeah, I'll just get the bus home. 574 00:25:15,120 --> 00:25:16,960 HE SCOFFS 575 00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:20,360 SPOOKY RAP MUSIC PLAYS 576 00:25:20,360 --> 00:25:25,240 ♪ Straight out of legend 577 00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:27,960 {\an8}# Hairy, howly monster called a werewolf 578 00:25:27,960 --> 00:25:30,280 {\an8}# Transforms, so I'll terrorise the neighbourhood 579 00:25:30,280 --> 00:25:32,720 ♪ There are stories from Greece Like the Golden Fleece 580 00:25:32,720 --> 00:25:35,360 ♪ Tales so scary, that you might go to pieces 581 00:25:35,360 --> 00:25:37,680 ♪ Stories from Rome Closer to home 582 00:25:37,680 --> 00:25:40,200 ♪ I weed in a circle And I turn my clothes to stone 583 00:25:40,200 --> 00:25:42,160 ♪ I always transform to a wolf and back 584 00:25:42,160 --> 00:25:44,760 ♪ Mess with me and I'm gonna attack... ♪ 585 00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:47,240 Realistically, I'll probably attack anyway. 586 00:25:47,240 --> 00:25:50,640 Especially on a full moon. So, you know, do what you like. 587 00:25:50,640 --> 00:25:53,840 Yo, yo, revenant where the medieval zombies are. 588 00:25:53,840 --> 00:25:57,920 ♪ We're straight out of legends 589 00:25:57,920 --> 00:26:00,600 ♪ Medieval zombie called a revenant 590 00:26:00,600 --> 00:26:02,920 ♪ 1,000 years old, but I still stayed relevant 591 00:26:02,920 --> 00:26:05,640 ♪ When I rise from the grave The people take flight 592 00:26:05,640 --> 00:26:08,320 ♪ But even when they lock the doors I hit them with the blight 593 00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:10,400 ♪ Breathe through the cracks Spread my plague - death 594 00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:12,840 ♪ You'll join me in the grave When you smell my breath... ♪ 595 00:26:12,840 --> 00:26:15,120 WEREWOLF CHOKING 596 00:26:15,120 --> 00:26:17,720 That is rank! And I've got heightened smelling ability, 597 00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:19,720 because of the wolf thing. Sorry about that. 598 00:26:19,720 --> 00:26:21,840 Dracula, tell them about the vampires. 599 00:26:21,840 --> 00:26:25,720 {\an8}# We're straight out of legend... ♪ 600 00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:26,960 {\an8}Eurgh! 601 00:26:26,960 --> 00:26:29,000 ♪ Blood suckers called Strigoi in a story 602 00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:31,160 ♪ Poshed up by the writer Polidori 603 00:26:31,160 --> 00:26:33,800 ♪ He made me a Lord Hard to kill with a sword 604 00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:36,320 ♪ Bram Stoker wrote Dracula And vampires soared 605 00:26:36,320 --> 00:26:38,680 ♪ Transylvanian lair But it's not really fair 606 00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:41,000 ♪ Stoker did research But he'd never been there 607 00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:43,520 ♪ Took my name from Vlad Who'd done a lot of killing 608 00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:45,720 ♪ Next to him I'm not a real villain... ♪ 609 00:26:45,720 --> 00:26:48,240 Don't tell them that. 610 00:26:48,240 --> 00:26:50,000 You're supposed to be scary. 611 00:26:50,000 --> 00:26:52,200 You're not even a legend, Frankenstein. 612 00:26:52,200 --> 00:26:54,240 Hey... where are you from? 613 00:26:54,240 --> 00:26:59,080 ♪ I'm straight out of novels 614 00:26:59,080 --> 00:27:01,720 ♪ Book by a woman called Shelley 615 00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:04,040 ♪ I'm also made of parts From my eyes to my belly 616 00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:05,480 ♪ But my name wasn't Frank 617 00:27:05,480 --> 00:27:06,960 ♪ Frankenstein was the crank 618 00:27:06,960 --> 00:27:09,360 ♪ Sparked me into life While suspended on a plank 619 00:27:09,360 --> 00:27:12,400 ♪ Straight out of legend 620 00:27:12,400 --> 00:27:14,240 ♪ Or the minds of the writers 621 00:27:14,240 --> 00:27:16,720 ♪ Straight out of legend 622 00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:18,880 ♪ When you see us coming You're really meant to fight us 623 00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:21,400 ♪ Straight out of legend 624 00:27:21,400 --> 00:27:23,480 ♪ We're meant to spread fear But people hold us so dear 625 00:27:23,480 --> 00:27:26,480 ♪ Straight out of legend 626 00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:28,160 ♪ I love a good scare Kind of makes me despair. ♪ 627 00:27:31,840 --> 00:27:34,920 Strike a pose! 628 00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:41,360 Can you send that one to me? Yeah. 629 00:27:42,720 --> 00:27:45,560 ♪ The past is no longer a mystery 630 00:27:45,560 --> 00:27:46,880 ♪ Hope you enjoyed Horrible Histories. ♪ 631 00:27:46,930 --> 00:27:51,480 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 47755

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