Original subtitles

On an outer-space adventure

They got hit by cosmic rays

And the four were changed forever

In some most fantastic ways

No need to fear, they're here

Just call the Four

Fantastic Four

- Don't need no more! - That's ungrammatical!

Reed Richards is elastic

Sue can fade from sight

Johnny is the Human Torch

The Thing just loves to fight

Call the Four

Fantastic Four

Fantastic Four

One, two, three, kick.

One, two, three, kick.

One, two, three, kick.

Four, five, seven, kick.

Wait a minute.

One, two, three, kick. One, two...

Three, kick.

Stop, Reed! If you do that at the Metropolitan Museum Ball,

they'll throw us out.

Sorry. The music sent me away.

Reed, what was that noise?

The beating of my heart, you wild thing!

Ben, Johnny, did you hear something?

Breathe easy.

Grasp your foot and relax.

Think positive thoughts.

Breathe easy.

Yeah, sure!

Ben!

What did you say, Susie?

I said did you and Johnny hear anything up on the roof?

I didn't hear nothing.

Hey, hot rod?

Did you hear anything?

The twerp didn't hear nothing either.

Lower exits armed.

All robots, move forward to your mission.

Commence projection of energy grid.

Interweave containment cage.

Breathe. Relax.

Breathe. Relax.

Now initiate diversion.

Why did you mess up my cards?

I didn't do nothing.

Now would you bug off? I'm trying to relax here!

You lay off my Wayne Newton records!

I didn't touch 'em. And you trashed my Fleer Marvel cards!

- Did not! - Did, too!

Flame on!

Stand still and get clobbered, you firefly!

Have a hot foot, hothead!

Yes. Proceed when ready.

Come back here, you little...

- What on earth? - I told you I heard something.

Johnny and Ben must be at it again.

Please make them behave. They listen to you.

I'll be back soon for my rumba... Olé!

Oh, Reed!

What is it? Oh, my...

Reed! Reed!

Complete your mission, my children. Now!

Reed!

Come back here.

Oh, yeah!

Come to Poppa.

Stop that! Now both of you!

Tell it to him. He started it!

Sheep dip! He messed up my Wayne Newton collection!

Now wait a minute. We're supposed to be a team.

How can we fight the enemies of mankind

if you're always fighting each other instead?

What the hey? This keeps us in practice.

Yeah? Who appointed you class monitor?

Look, I don't care what you do, but you're bothering Sue,

so knock it off!

Party pooper.

Excellent. Complete the energy cage.

Looks like a bomb hit the joint.

Where's Sue? Sue?

Susan Storm is my prisoner.

Who said that?

It's coming from outside.

If you wish her to remain unharmed,

you must follow my orders.

What? These ropes, they're solidified strands of energy.

Well, let me unsolidify 'em!

Fools! It is useless to resist.

That voice. It's been years but von Doom, is it you?

Victor von Doom?

Yes, Reed Richards.

As you see, the rumours of my death were without substance.

Show your face, pal,

cos I got a knuckle sandwich with your name on it!

Spare me your histrionics.

You have no choice but to obey me.

Step into the light and join us. Quickly!

A tractor beam. Sue's life is at stake.

Follow my lead.

Take it easy!

Robots, welcome my guests and secure them at once.

Call off the artillery! We're not going anywhere!

No, my young friend, you are!

Relax and enjoy the ride!

You are guests of Dr Doom.

Welcome. Your rooms are ready.

Oh, no. You're not getting me like that!

For the Thing, a vibranium steel apartment.

You might be able to batter your way out in a few thousand years.

Let's see how well the Human Torch can burn underwater.

Now we come to Mr Fantastic.

How can we hold such a clever fellow?

Mr Fantastic can make himself whatever shape he wants.

What better than a prison that can do the same?

How fantastic do your friends seem now, Susan?

Fantastic enough to defeat you in the end!

This isn't over yet!

Doombots, be gone!

You shall be my guest for dinner

and at sunrise I will give you a mission to perform for me.

And you will do it willingly or you will all die!

Sue, Johnny, Ben, can you read me?

Yes, I hear you, darling.

I got you, too, Reed.

Ben, can you hear me? Ben, please acknowledge.

Yeah, I hid your intercom in my gum, stretcho.

You're coming through loud and chewy.

The prisons Dr Doom prepared for us are clever

but, together, I know we can find a way out.

Someone's coming. It's Doom's servant, Hauptmann.

Dr Doom requests the honour of your presence at dinner, Mrs Richards.

You tell him to get lost, Susie!

Silence, you brainless oaf!

It is useless to struggle!

Ach, du lieber!

Release control.

Can't... quite reach!

There!

Sue! Now! Free Johnny!

Hurry, sis. Get me free and I'll melt Reed loose.

Alarm! Prisoner escaping!

You got that right, Mr Wiener Schnitzel.

Put me down!

It's no use! I'm free but I can't get the rest of us out!

What should I do?

- Have dinner with Doom. - What?

I know it's a lot to ask

but my guess is he needs to wait out the blizzard

before he can send us on his mission.

The longer we keep him talking,

the more time we'll have to figure a way out of here

so we can save you, save all of us.

I'll do my best, sweetheart,

but I won't breathe easy until I know you're safe.

Well, Hauptmann. I wondered what was holding you up.

Very funny.

They tricked me, Excellency. It was not my fault.

It is of no consequence.

I think our guests will behave themselves.

At least while Mrs Richards is at my table.

Won't you join me, my dear?

Perhaps Mrs Richards would like to freshen up before dinner.

Hauptmann, see to it.

If you try to escape again,

your wife will pay the penalty.

I bid you good evening.

The clock is ticking.

Johnny, Ben, we've got to get loose before the snowstorm blows over

or none of us may survive.

Sue Richards is beautiful.

But will her loyalty to her husband withstand this trial?

I wonder what she truly thinks of me.

I am powerful and once I was also handsome.

But now...

What do externals matter?

It is the man within who counts!

My life here is rather isolated. I'm pleased you accepted my invitation.

I had no choice.

But I wouldn't have missed it for the world.

I find you fascinating.

You do?

Hauptmann, clean up.

I've made an unfortunate mess.

As you were saying, you find me fascinating?

It's the man behind the mask that intrigues me.

I want to know more about you.

All about you.

Now, you have succeeded in fascinating me, Mrs Richards.

To your health, my charming Susan.

An excellent vintage.

And my story begins many years ago

in a gypsy camp not far from the vineyards below this castle.

My father, Rudolph,

was a most important man, a respected healer.

There was nothing miraculous about his cures.

Ancient knowledge passed down through the generations.

On many occasions he saved children who lay ill with dreaded fevers,

the gratitude in their eyes, the only reward he sought.

But the simple people of the village

believed he was a miracle worker, a sorcerer.

While some revered him, others saw him as a target.

A golden goose whose feathers they could pluck.

They saw their opportunity.

They were sure my father had no chance.

With such arrogant confidence,

the villains' cruelty was without bounds,

but they did not know what kind of man they'd chosen that night.

My father's scientific skills had powerful manifestations.

The robot spider served him well.

As did a blinding flash from his illuminated buckle.

The superstitious fools!

But this is too sad a story for such a cold evening.

I should be silent and allow you to enjoy the meal.

No, please,

I want you to tell me everything.

Yes. Everything.

Doom's robots. They've been programmed to understand English.

They're listening, so we'll have to use another language.

Yeah, that'll be a cinch for you, stretcho.

Far as I can tell you, he ain't never talked English.

Johnny, listen.

Reyay ouyay aeringway the atchway lay avegay ouyay

orfay ouryay irthdaybay?

Pig Latin!

Lay eanmay, igPay atinLay.

Now I can't understand neither one of 'em!

Ouryay atchway, ushpay the imertay.

Wow! I mean, ow-way. What is it?

A catalytic ignition system.

I could understand the Pig Latin better.

It's a cutting torch that works underwater. Hurry.

Use your torch to cut your way out of the tank.

Flame on!

His temperature is going up!

Way up!

The robots didn't sound the alarm. Hurry! We've got to find Sue.

Welcome to the fun house!

The fun isn't gonna last long.

Those aren't mirrors, they're laser furnaces.

Get back!

I'm glad they ain't mirrors...

...cos I sure don't need seven years' bad luck!

A diabolical maze! I expected no less from Dr Doom.

One of these passageways must lead to the main castle.

Yeah, one for the money,

two for the show,

we gotta save Susie,

now which way do we go?

I'm well aware of the situation, Ben,

but I can't take action without thinking first.

Well, so think! I mean, look. This wind is messing up my hairdo!

That's it! That icy wind is from the storm outside.

It's strongest from the left.

From the glimpse I caught of the castle's juxtaposition

with the mountain face, I deduce...

Yeah, yeah. You said left, we're going left.

If we wait for you to stop yapping,

we'll be on Medicare before we get out of here!

And so far this looks pretty good.

Subtitles by IMS