All language subtitles for Dumb&.Dumbęr

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 2 00:00:30,396 --> 00:00:32,990 (tires screech) 3 00:00:42,841 --> 00:00:44,775 Excuse me. 4 00:00:44,810 --> 00:00:47,370 Could you tell me how to get to the medical school? 5 00:00:47,413 --> 00:00:49,881 I'm supposed to be doing a lecture in about 20 minutes, 6 00:00:49,915 --> 00:00:51,780 and my driver's a bit lost. 7 00:00:51,817 --> 00:00:54,650 (Austrian accent) You go straight ahead, 8 00:00:54,686 --> 00:00:57,985 and, uh, you make a left over the bridge. 9 00:00:59,591 --> 00:01:01,718 That's a lovely accent you have. 10 00:01:01,760 --> 00:01:05,662 - New Jersey? - Austria. 11 00:01:05,697 --> 00:01:08,427 Austria! Ha ha! Well, then... 12 00:01:08,467 --> 00:01:10,662 (Australian accent) G'day, mate. 13 00:01:12,337 --> 00:01:15,636 Let's put another shrimp on the barbie. 14 00:01:15,674 --> 00:01:17,767 Let's not. 15 00:01:20,312 --> 00:01:22,246 Oh. 16 00:01:27,386 --> 00:01:30,719 ("Boom shack-a-lak" playing) 17 00:01:37,329 --> 00:01:39,695 # Boom shack-a-lak-a, what the people want # 18 00:01:39,731 --> 00:01:42,222 # Women them a flex and the men them a chant # 19 00:01:42,267 --> 00:01:44,235 # 'Ca' the '60s style, it have fe come back # 20 00:01:44,269 --> 00:01:46,737 # Draw fe bell-bottom, block heel and frock # 21 00:01:46,772 --> 00:01:49,502 # Boom shak-a-lak, rude boy # 22 00:01:49,541 --> 00:01:52,635 # Here when we tell them now, sir # 23 00:01:52,678 --> 00:01:56,011 # Wine your body, wriggle your belly # 24 00:01:56,048 --> 00:01:59,814 # Dip and go down-ee in the new stylee # 25 00:01:59,852 --> 00:02:03,015 # Wine and go up, wine and go down # 26 00:02:03,055 --> 00:02:06,684 # Bubble and a rocka to the new style around # 27 00:02:06,725 --> 00:02:10,252 # You fe line it up, you fe wine it up # 28 00:02:10,295 --> 00:02:13,560 # Do the Boom shak-a-lak till the dance hall fill up # 29 00:02:13,599 --> 00:02:17,797 # I say the Boom shack-a-lak are the brand new style # 30 00:02:17,836 --> 00:02:21,363 # Wicked say it wicked, jah jah, no say it wild # 31 00:02:21,406 --> 00:02:24,842 # Ragamuffin style fe the discipline child # 32 00:02:24,877 --> 00:02:27,903 # Dip and go downa 'ca' it well versatile # 33 00:02:27,946 --> 00:02:31,780 # You fe move fe your waist, move fe your back # 34 00:02:31,817 --> 00:02:35,344 # Wine and go down, do the shack-a-lak-a-lak # 35 00:02:35,387 --> 00:02:38,686 # Get in a groove 'ca' you are the top notch # 36 00:02:38,724 --> 00:02:40,919 # Bubble and a wine gal right 'pon the spot. # 37 00:02:40,959 --> 00:02:43,484 Now, who's got the wiener schnitzel? 38 00:02:43,529 --> 00:02:44,962 (dog barks) 39 00:02:44,997 --> 00:02:46,965 Beautiful. There you go, Dolf. 40 00:02:46,999 --> 00:02:49,399 There you go, buddy. Yeah. 41 00:02:49,434 --> 00:02:50,958 Let's see. 42 00:02:51,003 --> 00:02:53,563 Next, we got roast beef au jus. 43 00:02:53,605 --> 00:02:55,334 (dog whines) 44 00:02:55,374 --> 00:02:57,433 Who's got the roast beef au jus? 45 00:02:57,476 --> 00:02:59,501 Stella, beautiful. Bon appetit, Stella. 46 00:02:59,545 --> 00:03:01,342 Oui oui, yeah. 47 00:03:01,380 --> 00:03:03,541 Walk away. Go on. Go on. 48 00:03:03,582 --> 00:03:06,312 Last but not least... foot-long! 49 00:03:06,351 --> 00:03:09,343 - Who's got the foot-long? - (whimpering) 50 00:03:09,388 --> 00:03:11,481 There you... very funny, rascal. 51 00:03:11,523 --> 00:03:13,718 Very funny. In your dreams. 52 00:03:13,759 --> 00:03:16,660 Man: Harry, why haven't you dropped those dogs off at the show yet? 53 00:03:16,695 --> 00:03:19,357 Uh, sir, I didn't want to send them 54 00:03:19,398 --> 00:03:21,332 to a performance on an empty stomach, sir. 55 00:03:21,366 --> 00:03:23,960 - Get a move on it! - Yes, sir. 56 00:03:24,002 --> 00:03:26,334 Mutt cutts. 10-4. 57 00:03:27,339 --> 00:03:29,204 (all whining) 58 00:03:31,577 --> 00:03:33,545 (horn honks) 59 00:03:36,582 --> 00:03:38,243 (honks) 60 00:03:41,053 --> 00:03:43,722 (tires screech) 61 00:03:45,891 --> 00:03:47,358 Whew. 62 00:03:47,392 --> 00:03:49,326 Suck me sideways. 63 00:04:02,474 --> 00:04:05,637 Hello. How are you? 64 00:04:05,677 --> 00:04:07,907 (romantic pop music playing) 65 00:04:07,946 --> 00:04:11,006 Uh-uh-uh... uh... uh-uh-uh... 66 00:04:11,049 --> 00:04:12,880 I'll be out in one minute. 67 00:04:12,918 --> 00:04:15,113 (mumbles) 68 00:04:19,358 --> 00:04:21,053 Ow. 69 00:04:30,602 --> 00:04:32,035 (inhales) 70 00:04:32,070 --> 00:04:34,038 (exhales) 71 00:04:42,848 --> 00:04:44,713 Why are you going to the airport? 72 00:04:44,750 --> 00:04:46,615 Flying somewhere? 73 00:04:46,652 --> 00:04:48,085 How'd you guess? 74 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:49,587 I saw your luggage. 75 00:04:49,621 --> 00:04:51,589 Then when I noticed the airline ticket, 76 00:04:51,623 --> 00:04:53,591 I put two and two together. 77 00:04:53,625 --> 00:04:55,559 So where're you headed? 78 00:04:55,594 --> 00:04:57,061 Aspen. 79 00:04:57,095 --> 00:04:59,086 Mmm... California. 80 00:04:59,131 --> 00:05:01,326 Beautiful. 81 00:05:03,535 --> 00:05:06,902 Name's Christmas, Lloyd Christmas. 82 00:05:06,938 --> 00:05:09,133 I'm Mary Swanson. 83 00:05:09,174 --> 00:05:12,143 This isn't my real job, you know. 84 00:05:12,177 --> 00:05:14,441 - No? - Nope, my friend Harry and I 85 00:05:14,479 --> 00:05:16,674 are saving up our money to open our own pet store. 86 00:05:16,715 --> 00:05:18,945 That's nice. 87 00:05:19,951 --> 00:05:22,852 - I got worms. - I beg your pardon? 88 00:05:22,888 --> 00:05:26,051 That's what we're going to call it... I Got Worms. 89 00:05:26,091 --> 00:05:28,525 We're going to specialize in selling worm farms, 90 00:05:28,560 --> 00:05:30,892 you know, like ant farms. 91 00:05:32,531 --> 00:05:34,556 What's the matter? 92 00:05:34,599 --> 00:05:36,863 A little tense about the flight? 93 00:05:37,969 --> 00:05:39,766 Something like that. 94 00:05:39,805 --> 00:05:42,433 There's really nothing to worry about, Mary. 95 00:05:42,474 --> 00:05:44,704 Statistically, they say you're more likely 96 00:05:44,743 --> 00:05:46,643 to get killed on the way to the airport, 97 00:05:46,678 --> 00:05:49,112 you know, like in a head-on crash or flying off a cliff 98 00:05:49,147 --> 00:05:51,081 or getting trapped under a gas truck... 99 00:05:51,116 --> 00:05:53,050 That's the worst. I have this cousin... 100 00:05:53,085 --> 00:05:54,712 well, I had this cousin. 101 00:05:54,753 --> 00:05:57,916 Lloyd, could you keep your eyes on the road, please? 102 00:05:58,023 --> 00:05:59,923 Oh. Yeah. 103 00:05:59,958 --> 00:06:01,721 Good thinking. 104 00:06:01,760 --> 00:06:03,591 Can't be too careful. 105 00:06:03,628 --> 00:06:05,858 A lot of bad drivers out there. 106 00:06:05,897 --> 00:06:08,161 (tires screeching) 107 00:06:11,803 --> 00:06:14,169 Hey, watch it! 108 00:06:16,441 --> 00:06:18,341 (dogs whimpering) 109 00:06:19,644 --> 00:06:22,010 (tires screech) 110 00:06:22,047 --> 00:06:24,845 Okay, gang, you know the rules... 111 00:06:24,883 --> 00:06:27,010 no humping, no pushing, no sniffing heinies. 112 00:06:27,052 --> 00:06:31,512 Where have you been? My dogs were supposed to be here 40 minutes ago! 113 00:06:31,556 --> 00:06:33,524 Now I hardly have any time to primp them. 114 00:06:33,558 --> 00:06:35,822 Don't worry about a thing, Mrs. Neugy-burger. 115 00:06:35,861 --> 00:06:37,658 - Neugeboren! - Neug-neug-neug... 116 00:06:37,696 --> 00:06:39,129 - Boren! - Boren. 117 00:06:39,164 --> 00:06:41,098 These pooches aren't going to need any primping. 118 00:06:41,133 --> 00:06:42,760 You know why? I'll tell you why. 119 00:06:42,801 --> 00:06:45,065 Because I bathed them and I clipped them myself. 120 00:06:45,103 --> 00:06:47,867 And I stand by my performance. 121 00:06:53,945 --> 00:06:56,971 (whimpering) 122 00:06:57,983 --> 00:06:59,780 You know, on second thought, 123 00:06:59,818 --> 00:07:02,082 you might just want to run a comb through 'em. 124 00:07:02,120 --> 00:07:03,352 Male voice: The white zone is for the immediate 125 00:07:03,387 --> 00:07:04,585 Male voice: The white zone is for the immediate 126 00:07:04,623 --> 00:07:07,091 loading and unloading of passengers only. 127 00:07:07,125 --> 00:07:09,286 No parking. 128 00:07:10,829 --> 00:07:13,559 Thanks. Here you go. 129 00:07:13,598 --> 00:07:16,066 Oh no, Mary. 130 00:07:16,101 --> 00:07:18,433 I couldn't possibly accept that, 131 00:07:18,470 --> 00:07:20,870 not after all we've been through. 132 00:07:23,675 --> 00:07:25,575 Thank you, Lloyd. 133 00:07:25,610 --> 00:07:28,977 - Uh, good luck with your worms. - Yeah. 134 00:07:29,014 --> 00:07:30,914 Hey. 135 00:07:32,117 --> 00:07:33,914 How about a hug? 136 00:07:33,952 --> 00:07:35,715 The white zone is for the immediate 137 00:07:35,754 --> 00:07:38,951 loading and unloading of passengers only. 138 00:07:38,990 --> 00:07:40,821 No parking. 139 00:07:47,098 --> 00:07:48,963 Oh. 140 00:07:50,569 --> 00:07:53,197 I hate goodbyes. (chuckles) 141 00:07:53,238 --> 00:07:54,796 Oh. 142 00:07:55,807 --> 00:07:57,399 (groans) 143 00:07:59,478 --> 00:08:01,469 Uh, Lloyd... 144 00:08:01,513 --> 00:08:03,674 Shh! 145 00:08:03,715 --> 00:08:05,706 (whispers) Just go. 146 00:08:09,955 --> 00:08:13,186 (romantic pop music playing) 147 00:08:27,239 --> 00:08:29,366 (voice wavering) Be strong. 148 00:08:35,046 --> 00:08:37,071 (sighs) 149 00:08:43,255 --> 00:08:45,052 Woman over PA: Mr. Dan Mitchell, 150 00:08:45,090 --> 00:08:47,558 please pick up the white courtesy phone. 151 00:08:47,592 --> 00:08:51,722 Mr. Dan Mitchell, please pick up the white courtesy phone... 152 00:08:51,763 --> 00:08:55,130 She's gonna leave the briefcase near the escalator. 153 00:08:55,166 --> 00:08:58,795 - You make the pickup. - Piece of cake. 154 00:09:07,779 --> 00:09:10,407 # Goodbye, my lo... # ugh! 155 00:09:12,651 --> 00:09:14,448 (laughs) 156 00:09:16,054 --> 00:09:18,022 Hi! 157 00:09:18,056 --> 00:09:21,025 Passenger Maura Tadge, 158 00:09:21,059 --> 00:09:23,584 please pick up the white courtesy phone. 159 00:09:23,628 --> 00:09:25,118 You have a message. 160 00:09:25,163 --> 00:09:27,358 Passenger Maura Tadge. 161 00:09:33,004 --> 00:09:34,995 (yells) Agh! Mary! 162 00:09:36,241 --> 00:09:39,039 Man: There's our payday. 163 00:09:40,078 --> 00:09:42,103 She left it. Let's go. 164 00:09:42,147 --> 00:09:45,446 Lloyd: Excuse me! Coming through! 165 00:09:47,152 --> 00:09:50,849 Move it or lose it, sister! 166 00:09:54,726 --> 00:09:56,193 Hey! 167 00:09:57,195 --> 00:09:59,220 (panting) 168 00:09:59,264 --> 00:10:00,697 Eenie... 169 00:10:00,732 --> 00:10:03,132 meenie... minie... 170 00:10:03,168 --> 00:10:05,466 mo! 171 00:10:12,243 --> 00:10:14,211 Hold that plane! 172 00:10:14,245 --> 00:10:16,907 Sir, you can't go in there! 173 00:10:16,948 --> 00:10:18,210 It's okay! 174 00:10:18,249 --> 00:10:20,410 I'm a limo driver! 175 00:10:24,923 --> 00:10:27,323 - Agh! - (thuds) 176 00:10:27,359 --> 00:10:29,884 Whew... 177 00:10:29,928 --> 00:10:33,091 (moaning) 178 00:10:35,400 --> 00:10:37,425 (tires screech) 179 00:10:39,004 --> 00:10:43,373 (sirens blaring in distance) 180 00:10:48,980 --> 00:10:50,242 Hi, Lloyd. 181 00:10:50,281 --> 00:10:51,908 Hi, Harry. 182 00:10:51,950 --> 00:10:54,783 - How was your day? - Not bad. 183 00:10:54,819 --> 00:10:57,185 Fell off the jetway again. 184 00:11:02,694 --> 00:11:04,252 Who the hell you figure 185 00:11:04,295 --> 00:11:06,195 this guy's working for, anyway? 186 00:11:06,231 --> 00:11:08,290 I don't know. 187 00:11:10,235 --> 00:11:13,295 We sure as hell better find out. 188 00:11:17,175 --> 00:11:18,802 The ulcer? 189 00:11:18,843 --> 00:11:20,811 I'll live. 190 00:11:20,845 --> 00:11:23,279 (bird chirping) 191 00:11:28,286 --> 00:11:31,949 - So you got fired again, huh? - Oh, yeah. 192 00:11:31,990 --> 00:11:36,324 They always freak out when you leave the scene of an accident, you know? 193 00:11:37,762 --> 00:11:40,162 Yeah, well, I lost my job too. 194 00:11:40,198 --> 00:11:44,999 Man! You are one pathetic loser. 195 00:11:45,036 --> 00:11:47,971 (laughing) No offense. 196 00:11:48,006 --> 00:11:50,201 No. None taken. 197 00:11:52,310 --> 00:11:54,301 Ha ha ha! 198 00:11:54,345 --> 00:11:57,337 You know what really chaffs my ass, though? 199 00:11:57,382 --> 00:11:59,179 I spent my life's savings 200 00:11:59,217 --> 00:12:01,014 turning my van into a dog. 201 00:12:01,052 --> 00:12:03,043 Hi, Petey! 202 00:12:03,254 --> 00:12:05,449 The alarm alone cost me 200. 203 00:12:05,490 --> 00:12:07,481 Hey! Chicks love it. 204 00:12:07,525 --> 00:12:09,516 It's a shaggin' wagon. 205 00:12:09,561 --> 00:12:11,791 What's with the briefcase? 206 00:12:15,533 --> 00:12:17,330 It's a love memento. 207 00:12:17,368 --> 00:12:20,166 The most beautiful woman alive, 208 00:12:20,205 --> 00:12:22,503 I drove her to the airport. 209 00:12:22,540 --> 00:12:25,509 Sparks flew, emotions ran high. 210 00:12:25,543 --> 00:12:27,977 She actually talked to me, man. 211 00:12:28,012 --> 00:12:30,139 Get outta here. 212 00:12:30,181 --> 00:12:33,173 Oh, yeah yeah. Tractor beam... 213 00:12:33,218 --> 00:12:36,483 (humming whistle) Sucked me right in. 214 00:12:36,521 --> 00:12:39,490 Anyway... (inhales deeply) 215 00:12:39,524 --> 00:12:41,492 She left this in the terminal 216 00:12:41,526 --> 00:12:44,188 and flew to Aspen and out of my life. 217 00:12:44,229 --> 00:12:46,254 What's in it? 218 00:12:48,266 --> 00:12:50,632 Man... I would have to be a lowlife 219 00:12:50,668 --> 00:12:54,035 to go rootin' around in somebody else's private property. 220 00:12:54,072 --> 00:12:57,439 - Is it locked? - Yeah, really well. 221 00:12:57,475 --> 00:13:00,205 (knock on door) 222 00:13:05,116 --> 00:13:07,949 Harry: There's two of them. One of them's got a gun. 223 00:13:09,521 --> 00:13:11,887 Did you pay the gas bill? 224 00:13:13,391 --> 00:13:15,222 Hey... 225 00:13:15,260 --> 00:13:17,558 (whispering) Do you realize what you've done? 226 00:13:17,595 --> 00:13:19,529 I'm sorry. I say we bail. 227 00:13:19,564 --> 00:13:21,794 Okay. 228 00:13:28,706 --> 00:13:31,334 - (slams) - Briefcase ain't here. 229 00:13:31,376 --> 00:13:34,072 They must have taken it with them. 230 00:13:34,112 --> 00:13:36,080 Well, he's got to come home sometime. 231 00:13:36,114 --> 00:13:37,604 Maybe we should trash the place, 232 00:13:37,649 --> 00:13:39,742 send him a little message. 233 00:13:41,286 --> 00:13:43,686 I don't think he's going to get that message, Joe. 234 00:13:43,721 --> 00:13:46,053 I mean, the guy's got worms in his living room. 235 00:13:46,090 --> 00:13:48,251 Well. 236 00:13:48,293 --> 00:13:50,761 Oh, I got a better idea. 237 00:13:53,598 --> 00:13:56,328 "I thought I taw a puddy cat. 238 00:13:56,367 --> 00:13:58,130 I did. I did." 239 00:13:58,169 --> 00:13:59,693 (squawks) 240 00:14:01,272 --> 00:14:03,740 (cracking) 241 00:14:13,618 --> 00:14:16,109 I can't believe we drove around all day 242 00:14:16,154 --> 00:14:18,987 and there's not a single job in this town. 243 00:14:19,023 --> 00:14:21,150 There is nothing, nada, zip! 244 00:14:21,192 --> 00:14:23,990 Yeah, unless you want to work 40 hours a week. 245 00:14:24,028 --> 00:14:25,461 Pfft! 246 00:14:25,496 --> 00:14:27,623 Here. I'm going to go to the store. 247 00:14:27,665 --> 00:14:29,530 Okay, just get the bare essentials. 248 00:14:29,567 --> 00:14:31,364 This is the last of our dough. 249 00:14:31,402 --> 00:14:33,996 Hey. What do I look like? 250 00:14:34,038 --> 00:14:37,769 # Take a little walk to the edge of town # 251 00:14:37,809 --> 00:14:40,539 # Go across the tracks # 252 00:14:41,546 --> 00:14:44,174 # Where the viaduct looms # 253 00:14:44,215 --> 00:14:46,149 # Like a bird of doom # 254 00:14:46,184 --> 00:14:49,745 # As it shifts and cracks # 255 00:14:49,787 --> 00:14:54,349 # Where secrets lie in the border fires # 256 00:14:54,392 --> 00:14:56,360 # In the humming wires # 257 00:14:56,394 --> 00:14:59,557 # Hey, man, you know you're never coming back # 258 00:14:59,597 --> 00:15:01,497 # Past the square, past the bridge... # 259 00:15:01,532 --> 00:15:03,295 # Past the mills, past the stack... # 260 00:15:03,334 --> 00:15:04,824 (grunting) 261 00:15:06,537 --> 00:15:08,767 # On a gathering storm # 262 00:15:08,806 --> 00:15:10,467 # Comes a tall handsome man... # 263 00:15:10,508 --> 00:15:12,305 Cripes! 264 00:15:12,343 --> 00:15:15,369 # In a dusty black coat with a red right hand. # 265 00:15:21,119 --> 00:15:22,347 Excuse me, little old lady. 266 00:15:22,387 --> 00:15:24,412 (tires screech) 267 00:15:27,725 --> 00:15:30,159 Uh, do you have change for a dollar? 268 00:15:30,194 --> 00:15:31,718 Change? 269 00:15:31,763 --> 00:15:33,628 No, I'm sorry. I don't. 270 00:15:33,665 --> 00:15:35,690 Oh... well, uh, 271 00:15:35,733 --> 00:15:38,702 could you do me a favor and watch my stuff here 272 00:15:38,736 --> 00:15:40,465 while I go break a dollar? 273 00:15:40,505 --> 00:15:42,837 - Of course. - Thanks. 274 00:15:42,874 --> 00:15:46,071 Hey. I guess they're right. 275 00:15:46,110 --> 00:15:47,668 Senior citizens, 276 00:15:47,712 --> 00:15:50,237 although slow and dangerous behind the wheel, 277 00:15:50,281 --> 00:15:53,114 can still serve a purpose. 278 00:15:53,151 --> 00:15:56,416 I'll be right back. Don't you go dying on me! 279 00:16:01,159 --> 00:16:04,617 - Ugh! - Where's the booze? 280 00:16:04,662 --> 00:16:07,495 I got robbed by a sweet old lady 281 00:16:07,532 --> 00:16:10,092 on a motorized cart. 282 00:16:10,134 --> 00:16:12,295 I didn't even see it coming. 283 00:16:12,337 --> 00:16:14,100 Oh... 284 00:16:14,138 --> 00:16:16,129 - Harry? - No... 285 00:16:16,174 --> 00:16:18,404 - No... - Harry. Come on, Harry. 286 00:16:18,443 --> 00:16:20,172 Cheer up. 287 00:16:20,211 --> 00:16:22,270 It gets worse, Lloyd. 288 00:16:22,313 --> 00:16:24,247 My parakeet Petey... 289 00:16:24,282 --> 00:16:27,342 - Yeah? ...he's dead. 290 00:16:27,385 --> 00:16:30,183 (gasps) 291 00:16:30,221 --> 00:16:31,779 Aw... 292 00:16:31,823 --> 00:16:33,757 Oh, man. I'm sorry, Harry. 293 00:16:33,791 --> 00:16:35,782 What happened? 294 00:16:36,828 --> 00:16:38,796 His head fell off. 295 00:16:38,830 --> 00:16:40,730 His head fell off? 296 00:16:40,765 --> 00:16:43,131 Yeah, he was pretty old. 297 00:16:46,437 --> 00:16:47,802 Ugh! 298 00:16:47,839 --> 00:16:49,773 That's it. 299 00:16:49,807 --> 00:16:52,275 I've had it with this dump! 300 00:16:52,310 --> 00:16:55,245 We got no food. We got no jobs. 301 00:16:55,279 --> 00:16:57,248 (yells) Our pets' heads are falling off! 302 00:16:57,283 --> 00:16:59,216 Okay, just calm down! 303 00:16:59,250 --> 00:17:01,582 What the hell are we doing here, Harry? 304 00:17:01,619 --> 00:17:03,746 We gotta get out of this town! 305 00:17:03,788 --> 00:17:06,348 Yeah? And go where? Where are we gonna go? 306 00:17:06,391 --> 00:17:09,258 I'll tell you where, 307 00:17:09,293 --> 00:17:11,193 someplace warm... 308 00:17:11,229 --> 00:17:13,527 a place where the beer flows like wine, 309 00:17:13,564 --> 00:17:15,657 where beautiful women instinctively flock 310 00:17:15,700 --> 00:17:17,998 like the salmon of Capistrano. 311 00:17:19,370 --> 00:17:21,634 I'm talking about a little place called... 312 00:17:21,672 --> 00:17:24,402 Aspen. 313 00:17:24,442 --> 00:17:27,605 I don't know, Lloyd. The French are assholes. 314 00:17:27,645 --> 00:17:30,079 Wait a minute. 315 00:17:32,316 --> 00:17:34,648 Wait a minute! I know what you're up to, mister. 316 00:17:34,685 --> 00:17:37,381 Yeah! You just wanna go to Aspen 317 00:17:37,422 --> 00:17:39,856 and find that girl who lost her briefcase, 318 00:17:39,891 --> 00:17:42,257 and you need me to drive you there! 319 00:17:42,293 --> 00:17:44,659 - Right? Am I right? - Yeah. So? 320 00:17:44,695 --> 00:17:48,096 - Am I right? Am I right? - Yeah! So? 321 00:17:48,132 --> 00:17:50,396 So I wanna go someplace where we know somebody 322 00:17:50,435 --> 00:17:52,403 who can plug us into the social pipeline. 323 00:17:52,437 --> 00:17:54,735 No! No no no! No, Lloyd! 324 00:17:54,772 --> 00:17:57,570 No! I say we stay here, we hunt for jobs, 325 00:17:57,608 --> 00:18:00,202 and we keep saving our money for the worm store! 326 00:18:00,244 --> 00:18:02,508 I don't know about you, 327 00:18:02,547 --> 00:18:04,208 but I am getting sick and tired 328 00:18:04,248 --> 00:18:05,715 of-of running from creditors! 329 00:18:05,750 --> 00:18:09,379 You know what I'm sick and tired of, Harry? 330 00:18:11,255 --> 00:18:14,884 I'm sick and tired of having to eke my way through life. 331 00:18:19,297 --> 00:18:21,458 I'm sick and tired of being a nobody. 332 00:18:22,767 --> 00:18:24,894 But most of all... 333 00:18:29,207 --> 00:18:32,404 I'm sick and tired of having nobody. 334 00:18:33,444 --> 00:18:34,706 (soft piano music playing) 335 00:18:34,745 --> 00:18:36,770 Okay, Lloyd. 336 00:18:40,451 --> 00:18:42,612 Aspen it is. 337 00:18:46,257 --> 00:18:48,248 You'd better not be foolin'. 338 00:18:48,292 --> 00:18:50,089 (chuckles) 339 00:18:52,430 --> 00:18:54,261 (crying) 340 00:18:54,298 --> 00:18:57,267 Okay okay, 341 00:18:57,301 --> 00:18:59,326 just let it out. Have a good cry. 342 00:18:59,370 --> 00:19:01,338 Come on. 343 00:19:01,372 --> 00:19:03,169 Okay. 344 00:19:03,207 --> 00:19:05,675 (sobbing) 345 00:19:05,710 --> 00:19:07,812 Okay, that's enough. 346 00:19:13,951 --> 00:19:16,215 # I never met a girl # 347 00:19:16,254 --> 00:19:19,348 # Who made me feel the way that you do # 348 00:19:19,390 --> 00:19:21,551 # You're all right # 349 00:19:21,592 --> 00:19:24,527 # Whenever I'm asked who makes my dreams real # 350 00:19:24,562 --> 00:19:28,498 # I tell them you do, you're outta sight # 351 00:19:28,533 --> 00:19:31,696 # I'm bringin' you a love that's true # 352 00:19:31,736 --> 00:19:35,797 # So get ready, get ready # 353 00:19:35,840 --> 00:19:38,468 # I'm gonna try to make you love me too # 354 00:19:38,509 --> 00:19:43,242 # So get ready, get ready, here I come # 355 00:19:43,281 --> 00:19:45,442 # Get ready 'cause here I come... # 356 00:19:45,483 --> 00:19:47,348 Lloyd, what are you doing? 357 00:19:47,385 --> 00:19:49,580 It feels like you're running at an incredible rate, Harry. 358 00:19:49,620 --> 00:19:51,747 Would you quit it? We're not even through Connecticut yet, 359 00:19:51,789 --> 00:19:52,983 and already you're annoying me. 360 00:19:53,024 --> 00:19:55,515 - Sorry. - Jeez. 361 00:19:55,560 --> 00:19:58,757 - We're really doing it, aren't we? - Yeah. 362 00:19:59,764 --> 00:20:01,391 Hey, where'd you get those? 363 00:20:01,432 --> 00:20:04,868 I bought them when we filled up. 364 00:20:04,902 --> 00:20:06,927 Well... (stutters) We're supposed to talk 365 00:20:06,971 --> 00:20:08,734 about all expenditures, Lloyd. 366 00:20:08,773 --> 00:20:10,604 We're on a very tight budget. 367 00:20:10,641 --> 00:20:12,871 This didn't come out of our travel fund. 368 00:20:12,910 --> 00:20:14,377 Oh. 369 00:20:14,412 --> 00:20:16,312 No, I was able to raise 25 extra bucks 370 00:20:16,347 --> 00:20:18,713 before we left. 371 00:20:18,749 --> 00:20:20,979 Where did you get 25 extra bucks? 372 00:20:21,018 --> 00:20:24,249 I sold some stuff to Billy in 4C. 373 00:20:24,288 --> 00:20:26,688 The blind kid? 374 00:20:26,724 --> 00:20:28,817 Yeah! 375 00:20:28,859 --> 00:20:30,554 Yeah. 376 00:20:30,595 --> 00:20:33,029 What did you sell him, Lloyd? 377 00:20:34,632 --> 00:20:36,395 Stuff. 378 00:20:36,434 --> 00:20:39,892 - What kind of stuff? - I don't know. 379 00:20:39,937 --> 00:20:42,030 A few baseball cards, a sack of marbles... 380 00:20:42,073 --> 00:20:44,234 (coughs) Petey. 381 00:20:45,810 --> 00:20:47,744 Petey? 382 00:20:47,778 --> 00:20:50,679 You sold my dead bird to a blind kid? 383 00:20:50,715 --> 00:20:53,878 Lloyd, that-that... what are you... 384 00:20:53,918 --> 00:20:56,409 Petey didn't even have a head! 385 00:20:56,454 --> 00:20:59,787 Harry, I took care of it. 386 00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:04,528 Pretty bird. 387 00:21:04,562 --> 00:21:06,359 Yeah. Can you say, "pretty bird"? 388 00:21:06,397 --> 00:21:07,955 Pretty bird. 389 00:21:07,999 --> 00:21:10,627 Yes, pretty bird. 390 00:21:10,668 --> 00:21:12,761 Pretty bird. 391 00:21:16,073 --> 00:21:18,098 Polly want a cracker? 392 00:21:21,812 --> 00:21:23,439 Those rat bastards. 393 00:21:23,481 --> 00:21:25,608 They're rubbing it right in our faces. 394 00:21:25,650 --> 00:21:27,641 Man, Andre'll have a goddamn hemorrhage 395 00:21:27,685 --> 00:21:29,482 if we don't get that briefcase back. 396 00:21:29,520 --> 00:21:31,545 They must have been following us for weeks. 397 00:21:31,589 --> 00:21:34,786 - Why you say? - "Gas Man." 398 00:21:34,825 --> 00:21:37,487 How the hell do they know that I got gas? 399 00:21:37,528 --> 00:21:39,621 They gotta be pros. 400 00:21:40,998 --> 00:21:43,762 Don't worry. We're going to get that money back. 401 00:21:44,835 --> 00:21:47,463 And I'll tell you something else, 402 00:21:47,505 --> 00:21:49,496 they ain't never getting to Aspen. 403 00:21:49,540 --> 00:21:51,804 I'm going to see to that. 404 00:21:57,448 --> 00:21:59,439 Lloyd: They got The Monkees. 405 00:21:59,483 --> 00:22:01,542 They were a major influence on The Beatles. 406 00:22:01,585 --> 00:22:03,883 Yeah, I know. 407 00:22:05,022 --> 00:22:07,081 Excuse me, Flo? 408 00:22:07,124 --> 00:22:09,649 (both laughing) 409 00:22:15,833 --> 00:22:18,165 Flo, like the TV show. 410 00:22:19,704 --> 00:22:22,673 Uh... what is the "soup du jour"? 411 00:22:22,707 --> 00:22:24,368 It's the soup of the day. 412 00:22:24,408 --> 00:22:26,069 Mm-hmm... 413 00:22:26,110 --> 00:22:28,237 That sounds good. I'll have that. 414 00:22:29,547 --> 00:22:31,811 Anything else before I leave the area? 415 00:22:31,849 --> 00:22:33,612 No... yeah... 416 00:22:33,651 --> 00:22:35,516 yes yes, my soda's flat. 417 00:22:35,553 --> 00:22:37,851 It doesn't have any bubbles. 418 00:22:45,062 --> 00:22:46,825 Happy now? 419 00:22:51,068 --> 00:22:53,866 Feels good to mingle with these laid-back country folk, 420 00:22:53,904 --> 00:22:57,965 don't it, Harr? I like it a lot. 421 00:22:59,543 --> 00:23:02,671 - Uh-oh. - What? What's the matter? 422 00:23:03,914 --> 00:23:05,745 (blows) 423 00:23:05,783 --> 00:23:08,513 You spilled the salt, that's what's the matter. 424 00:23:08,552 --> 00:23:11,578 Spilling the salt is very bad luck. 425 00:23:11,622 --> 00:23:13,647 We're driving across the country. 426 00:23:13,691 --> 00:23:15,852 The last thing we need is bad luck. 427 00:23:15,893 --> 00:23:19,385 Quick. Toss some salt over your right shoulder. 428 00:23:21,866 --> 00:23:24,699 (thumps) 429 00:23:24,735 --> 00:23:28,193 Uh-oh, too little too late, Harry. 430 00:23:30,741 --> 00:23:34,472 Who's the dead man that hit me with the salt shaker? 431 00:23:34,512 --> 00:23:36,878 (crowd murmuring) 432 00:23:39,083 --> 00:23:42,109 (humming) 433 00:23:44,054 --> 00:23:46,488 Harry: Well... uh... 434 00:23:46,524 --> 00:23:48,048 it was a terrible mistake, sir. 435 00:23:48,092 --> 00:23:50,492 Please, believe me. I would never do anything 436 00:23:50,528 --> 00:23:52,052 to offend a man of your size. 437 00:23:52,096 --> 00:23:54,360 Kick his ass, Sea Bass! 438 00:23:57,535 --> 00:23:59,025 You gonna eat that? 439 00:23:59,069 --> 00:24:00,764 What? That? No... yes... no. 440 00:24:00,805 --> 00:24:02,796 Well... no, it crossed my mind. 441 00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:04,899 Yeah. 442 00:24:04,942 --> 00:24:08,343 (snorts, hawks) 443 00:24:18,989 --> 00:24:20,752 Still want it? 444 00:24:20,791 --> 00:24:23,783 Nah, you go ahead. 445 00:24:28,999 --> 00:24:32,196 You really wimped out, man. 446 00:24:32,236 --> 00:24:34,227 What are you talking about, wimped out? 447 00:24:34,271 --> 00:24:37,240 Well-well, did you... the guy hawked on my burger! 448 00:24:37,274 --> 00:24:39,504 Hey, wait a second. 449 00:24:39,543 --> 00:24:41,807 I think I just... 450 00:24:41,846 --> 00:24:44,838 Yeah... I just had an idea. 451 00:24:49,186 --> 00:24:51,416 Follow me. 452 00:24:53,157 --> 00:24:55,250 Whew. 453 00:24:58,262 --> 00:25:00,093 Lloyd: Excuse me. Guys? 454 00:25:00,130 --> 00:25:01,825 What the hell do you want? 455 00:25:01,866 --> 00:25:05,233 Uh... I just want to apologize 456 00:25:05,269 --> 00:25:07,066 for that uh... unpleasant scene 457 00:25:07,104 --> 00:25:08,799 a little earlier. 458 00:25:08,839 --> 00:25:12,240 My friend Harry and I would, uh... 459 00:25:12,276 --> 00:25:14,608 like to buy you guys a... 460 00:25:14,645 --> 00:25:16,636 round of beers... 461 00:25:16,680 --> 00:25:18,580 just to bury the hatchet. 462 00:25:18,616 --> 00:25:20,846 Make it four boilermakers. 463 00:25:20,885 --> 00:25:22,785 Whatever you want, sir. 464 00:25:22,820 --> 00:25:25,812 I'll have the waitress bring it over immediately. 465 00:25:27,324 --> 00:25:29,622 - Lloyd, what are you doing? - (shushing) 466 00:25:29,660 --> 00:25:31,821 We can't afford to buy them drinks. 467 00:25:34,732 --> 00:25:36,893 Um... excuse me. 468 00:25:36,934 --> 00:25:40,802 Sea Bass and the fellas offered to pick up our check. 469 00:25:40,838 --> 00:25:43,363 They said just put it on their tab. 470 00:25:44,708 --> 00:25:46,232 They're very nice. 471 00:25:47,244 --> 00:25:49,235 Sea Bass said that? 472 00:25:49,280 --> 00:25:51,680 Well, if uh... 473 00:25:51,715 --> 00:25:54,445 that guy at the table over there is Sea Bass. 474 00:25:58,856 --> 00:26:01,086 Ah! Uh. 475 00:26:02,092 --> 00:26:04,788 All right, if that's what he wants. 476 00:26:05,796 --> 00:26:07,764 Put these on there too, okay? 477 00:26:07,798 --> 00:26:10,164 You got it. 478 00:26:15,406 --> 00:26:18,136 I'm gonna kill those sons of bitches! 479 00:26:19,143 --> 00:26:21,161 (both laugh) 480 00:26:21,196 --> 00:26:23,179 (both laugh) 481 00:26:23,213 --> 00:26:25,738 That was genius, Lloyd, sheer genius! 482 00:26:25,783 --> 00:26:28,115 I mean, where did you come up with a scam like that? 483 00:26:28,152 --> 00:26:31,918 - Saw it in a movie once. - That was incredible! 484 00:26:31,956 --> 00:26:34,390 So what happened? So the guy tricks some sucker 485 00:26:34,425 --> 00:26:37,326 into picking up his tab, then gets away with it scot-free? 486 00:26:37,361 --> 00:26:40,990 No, in the movie, they catch up to him a half-mile down the road 487 00:26:41,031 --> 00:26:44,228 and slit his throat. It was a good one! 488 00:26:44,268 --> 00:26:46,133 (laughing) 489 00:26:46,170 --> 00:26:49,162 Wow. (grunts) 490 00:26:49,206 --> 00:26:52,107 - Harry? - What? 491 00:26:52,142 --> 00:26:54,076 I know this isn't the best time, but... 492 00:26:54,111 --> 00:26:56,341 - when you get a chance to pull over... - Yeah? 493 00:26:56,380 --> 00:26:58,109 - I gotta pee. - What, are you crazy? 494 00:26:58,148 --> 00:26:59,775 I'm not pulling over now. 495 00:26:59,817 --> 00:27:01,785 But I gotta go! What am I supposed to do? 496 00:27:01,819 --> 00:27:05,050 Well-well, whiz in one of the empty beer bottles in the back. 497 00:27:05,089 --> 00:27:07,717 They're on the floor. Just get one of... 498 00:27:07,758 --> 00:27:10,249 - Jeez, Lloyd! - Quit moving around! 499 00:27:11,261 --> 00:27:12,853 Huh! What... 500 00:27:12,896 --> 00:27:14,864 Shit! 501 00:27:14,898 --> 00:27:17,093 (unzips pants) 502 00:27:17,134 --> 00:27:18,863 - Watch the seat! Watch the seat! - Okay! 503 00:27:18,902 --> 00:27:21,604 All right! 504 00:27:21,639 --> 00:27:23,607 (trickling) 505 00:27:23,641 --> 00:27:27,008 Ahh... 506 00:27:28,012 --> 00:27:29,775 Ahh... 507 00:27:29,813 --> 00:27:33,806 - Uh-oh. - What? What's wrong? 508 00:27:33,851 --> 00:27:36,183 The bottle's almost full and I'm still going. 509 00:27:36,220 --> 00:27:39,189 - So stop going. - I can't stop going once I've started. 510 00:27:39,223 --> 00:27:41,157 It stings. 511 00:27:41,191 --> 00:27:42,715 Quick! Get me another bottle. 512 00:27:42,760 --> 00:27:43,988 - What? - Come on. 513 00:27:44,028 --> 00:27:45,655 Hurry hurry hurry hurry hurry hurry! 514 00:27:45,696 --> 00:27:47,254 Come on! Come on! 515 00:27:47,297 --> 00:27:49,629 Okay okay, here here here. Hold it! 516 00:27:53,137 --> 00:27:57,073 - Hold that. - Jesus. 517 00:28:01,679 --> 00:28:03,943 Hold that one. 518 00:28:03,981 --> 00:28:05,710 Hurry. I'm pinching it. 519 00:28:05,749 --> 00:28:07,683 What are you, a camel? 520 00:28:07,718 --> 00:28:10,710 (sighs) 521 00:28:10,754 --> 00:28:14,952 - (siren blaring) - Pull over! 522 00:28:18,295 --> 00:28:20,559 - Huh? - Pull over! 523 00:28:22,199 --> 00:28:24,793 No, it's a cardigan, but thanks for noticing. 524 00:28:24,835 --> 00:28:27,861 Yeah. Killer boots, man! 525 00:28:27,905 --> 00:28:31,568 Pull your vehicle to the side of the road! 526 00:28:39,850 --> 00:28:42,580 License and registration, please. 527 00:28:46,890 --> 00:28:50,257 You fellas were going a little fast back there, wouldn't you say? 528 00:28:51,729 --> 00:28:53,890 You, uh... you fellas been doing 529 00:28:53,931 --> 00:28:55,762 a bit of boozing, have you? 530 00:28:55,799 --> 00:28:58,427 Sucking back on Grandpa's old cough medicine? 531 00:28:58,469 --> 00:28:59,800 No. Oh no, sir. 532 00:28:59,837 --> 00:29:01,202 - No no no. - No, huh-uh. 533 00:29:01,238 --> 00:29:04,139 Yeah, well, what's that? 534 00:29:05,809 --> 00:29:08,243 - That's nothing, sir. - Yeah, nothing. 535 00:29:08,278 --> 00:29:11,338 Yeah well, you aware that it's against the law 536 00:29:11,381 --> 00:29:13,178 to have an open alcohol container 537 00:29:13,217 --> 00:29:15,048 here in the State of Pennsylvania? 538 00:29:15,085 --> 00:29:16,450 Come on, give me that booze, 539 00:29:16,487 --> 00:29:18,819 you little pumpkin-pie- haircutted freak! 540 00:29:18,856 --> 00:29:20,517 Come on! 541 00:29:28,799 --> 00:29:30,096 Sir, no, I- I... 542 00:29:30,134 --> 00:29:31,761 No, sir, don't. Don't drink... 543 00:29:31,802 --> 00:29:33,360 You'd keep your mouth shut 544 00:29:33,403 --> 00:29:35,564 if you knew what was good for you, buddy. 545 00:29:51,822 --> 00:29:53,187 Harry: Tic Tac, sir? 546 00:29:53,223 --> 00:29:55,316 Get the hell outta here! 547 00:29:57,227 --> 00:29:59,923 (coughs, retches) 548 00:29:59,963 --> 00:30:03,865 Mary: How could they not have gotten the ransom? 549 00:30:03,901 --> 00:30:05,493 It just doesn't make sense. 550 00:30:05,536 --> 00:30:08,528 I left the money exactly where they instructed me to. 551 00:30:08,572 --> 00:30:10,335 Woman: Oh, it makes perfect sense, Mary. 552 00:30:10,374 --> 00:30:12,205 We should have called the authorities 553 00:30:12,242 --> 00:30:14,039 the minute we knew that Bobby was kidnapped. 554 00:30:14,077 --> 00:30:15,908 Now, Helen, we've been through this already. 555 00:30:15,946 --> 00:30:18,881 - Mr. Andre. - Nicholas. 556 00:30:18,916 --> 00:30:22,215 - Karl. - Nick Nick Nick. 557 00:30:22,252 --> 00:30:23,879 Any word yet, sir? 558 00:30:23,921 --> 00:30:25,889 No, nothing yet, Nicholas. 559 00:30:25,923 --> 00:30:27,891 (sighs) 560 00:30:27,925 --> 00:30:29,893 I've been giving this a lot of thought. 561 00:30:29,927 --> 00:30:31,986 Maybe we should cancel 562 00:30:32,029 --> 00:30:34,088 the preservation benefit this weekend. 563 00:30:34,131 --> 00:30:35,996 It would be so easy to reschedule it. 564 00:30:36,033 --> 00:30:38,467 No, I don't think we should do anything out of the ordinary. 565 00:30:38,502 --> 00:30:41,528 Yeah, she's right. It's imperative that we carry on as usual... 566 00:30:41,572 --> 00:30:43,267 - Okay. ...especially you, Mary. 567 00:30:43,307 --> 00:30:45,036 What am I supposed to do, 568 00:30:45,075 --> 00:30:47,270 just go about my life like everything is fine? 569 00:30:47,311 --> 00:30:49,142 That's exactly what you should do. 570 00:30:49,179 --> 00:30:51,306 Yes, go skiing, go to parties, act normally, you know. 571 00:30:51,348 --> 00:30:52,940 Yeah, don't you see, honey? 572 00:30:52,983 --> 00:30:54,848 We can't let on that anything's wrong. 573 00:30:54,885 --> 00:30:57,080 If the press or the authorities get wind of this, 574 00:30:57,120 --> 00:30:58,553 the kidnappers may panic. 575 00:30:58,589 --> 00:31:01,114 Mm. I mean, you never know 576 00:31:01,158 --> 00:31:03,126 what they might do to him then. 577 00:31:09,900 --> 00:31:12,596 (snoring) 578 00:31:20,878 --> 00:31:23,210 # I saw her sitting in the rain # 579 00:31:24,481 --> 00:31:27,177 # Raindrops falling on her # 580 00:31:27,217 --> 00:31:29,310 # She didn't seem to care # 581 00:31:29,353 --> 00:31:33,847 # She sat there and smiled at me # 582 00:31:33,891 --> 00:31:37,452 - # Then I knew # - # I knew, I knew, I knew, I knew # 583 00:31:37,494 --> 00:31:41,260 - # She could make me happy # - # Happy happy # 584 00:31:41,298 --> 00:31:43,061 # She could make me very happy... # 585 00:31:43,100 --> 00:31:46,433 # Flowers in her hair # 586 00:31:46,470 --> 00:31:50,930 # Flowers everywhere # 587 00:31:50,974 --> 00:31:53,169 # I love the flower-girl # 588 00:31:53,210 --> 00:31:55,041 # Oh, I don't know just why # 589 00:31:55,078 --> 00:31:57,410 # She simply caught my eye # 590 00:31:57,447 --> 00:32:00,314 # I love the flower-girl... # 591 00:32:00,350 --> 00:32:02,215 So he says, "Do you love me?" 592 00:32:02,252 --> 00:32:05,278 And she says, "No, but that's a real nice ski mask." 593 00:32:05,322 --> 00:32:07,722 (all laughing) 594 00:32:12,429 --> 00:32:13,896 Hey, man, what's that? 595 00:32:30,981 --> 00:32:32,915 (passes gas) 596 00:32:42,993 --> 00:32:45,223 # I knew I had to say hello # 597 00:32:45,262 --> 00:32:46,524 # Hello hello # 598 00:32:46,563 --> 00:32:50,260 # She smiled up at me # 599 00:32:50,300 --> 00:32:51,995 # And she took my hand # 600 00:32:52,035 --> 00:32:55,436 # And we walked through the park alone # 601 00:32:56,473 --> 00:32:58,236 # And I knew # 602 00:32:58,275 --> 00:32:59,970 # I knew, I knew, I knew, I knew # 603 00:33:00,010 --> 00:33:01,443 # She had made me happy... # 604 00:33:01,478 --> 00:33:03,446 Whoo! 605 00:33:03,480 --> 00:33:05,539 # Happy happy, she had made me very happy # 606 00:33:05,582 --> 00:33:08,244 - # Flowers in her hair... # - (cracks) 607 00:33:18,028 --> 00:33:20,019 - (bell rings) - (roaring) 608 00:33:20,063 --> 00:33:21,792 (crunches) 609 00:33:29,139 --> 00:33:30,766 (yelling) 610 00:33:33,410 --> 00:33:36,675 (movements swishing) 611 00:33:36,713 --> 00:33:39,546 (high-pitched battle-cries) 612 00:33:41,785 --> 00:33:43,616 (trills) 613 00:33:44,621 --> 00:33:46,555 (gurgling) 614 00:33:47,557 --> 00:33:48,956 (snorts) 615 00:34:11,048 --> 00:34:13,346 (shouts) 616 00:34:13,383 --> 00:34:15,374 (vocalizes) 617 00:34:15,419 --> 00:34:18,479 Ahh... 618 00:34:18,522 --> 00:34:20,490 eh? 619 00:34:21,758 --> 00:34:23,726 Aah! 620 00:34:23,760 --> 00:34:25,421 Aah! 621 00:34:25,462 --> 00:34:28,761 (heartbeat thumping) 622 00:34:37,607 --> 00:34:41,543 - # Suddenly, the sun broke through # - # See the sun # 623 00:34:41,578 --> 00:34:45,571 - # I turned around, she was gone # - # Where did she go? # 624 00:34:45,615 --> 00:34:47,446 (grunting) 625 00:34:47,484 --> 00:34:49,418 (moaning) 626 00:34:52,255 --> 00:34:54,553 Oh! Oh! 627 00:34:54,591 --> 00:34:56,422 (groaning) 628 00:34:57,427 --> 00:34:58,724 (rips) 629 00:34:59,729 --> 00:35:03,529 # Flowers in her hair # 630 00:35:03,567 --> 00:35:07,765 # Flowers everywhere # 631 00:35:07,804 --> 00:35:10,068 # I love the flower-girl # 632 00:35:10,107 --> 00:35:11,802 # Was she reality # 633 00:35:11,842 --> 00:35:14,436 # Or just a dream to me? # 634 00:35:14,478 --> 00:35:18,278 # I love the flower-girl # 635 00:35:18,315 --> 00:35:20,283 (fades) # Her love showed me the way... # 636 00:35:20,317 --> 00:35:23,445 - # To find a sunny day. # - (horn honking) 637 00:35:26,156 --> 00:35:28,590 Whoa! 638 00:35:30,160 --> 00:35:32,560 (backfire) 639 00:35:32,596 --> 00:35:35,622 You want me to drive? 640 00:35:35,665 --> 00:35:38,133 No, I'm cool. 641 00:35:46,443 --> 00:35:49,037 (water bubbling) 642 00:36:11,635 --> 00:36:13,603 Yeah! 643 00:36:13,637 --> 00:36:16,128 Get her! 644 00:36:18,575 --> 00:36:20,338 (chuckles) 645 00:36:20,377 --> 00:36:22,208 - Ohh. - (thuds, water splashes) 646 00:36:22,245 --> 00:36:23,872 (sighs) 647 00:36:23,914 --> 00:36:26,246 This is the life... 648 00:36:26,283 --> 00:36:29,150 cold beer, a hot tub and paper-thin walls. 649 00:36:29,186 --> 00:36:31,848 (laughs) 650 00:36:31,888 --> 00:36:34,857 There's only one thing that could make this moment any better. 651 00:36:34,891 --> 00:36:36,552 What's that? 652 00:36:36,593 --> 00:36:38,493 If you had a nice set of knockers. 653 00:36:38,528 --> 00:36:41,326 (laughs) That's two things, Lloyd. 654 00:36:41,364 --> 00:36:44,299 Yeah, well, it's a good thing you're not stacked, Harry, 655 00:36:44,334 --> 00:36:45,801 or I'd be banging you right now. 656 00:36:45,835 --> 00:36:47,735 (both laugh) 657 00:36:47,771 --> 00:36:49,864 I'd show you what a real man can do. 658 00:36:49,906 --> 00:36:53,501 Split you like an old piece of firewood. 659 00:36:56,646 --> 00:36:59,479 You'd probably like it too, you big homo. 660 00:36:59,516 --> 00:37:01,211 Shut up. 661 00:37:01,251 --> 00:37:04,448 Don't tell me to shut up, woman. 662 00:37:08,425 --> 00:37:10,518 (chuckles) 663 00:37:13,797 --> 00:37:15,526 I don't know, Lloyd. You know, 664 00:37:15,565 --> 00:37:17,396 this place doesn't really do it for me. 665 00:37:17,434 --> 00:37:19,561 It brings back a lot of memories. 666 00:37:20,570 --> 00:37:22,333 Pour quoi? 667 00:37:22,372 --> 00:37:25,899 It was a few years ago. 668 00:37:25,942 --> 00:37:28,706 What happened, Harry? Some little filly break your heart? 669 00:37:28,745 --> 00:37:30,337 No, it was a girl. 670 00:37:30,380 --> 00:37:31,870 - Oh. - Fraida Felcher. 671 00:37:31,915 --> 00:37:34,281 Yeah, we stayed in a place just like this. 672 00:37:34,317 --> 00:37:36,717 Wasn't this classy, but, you know, nice. 673 00:37:36,753 --> 00:37:39,654 Felcher? From Cranston? 674 00:37:39,689 --> 00:37:40,986 Yeah. You know her? 675 00:37:41,024 --> 00:37:42,821 Oh, yeah! 676 00:37:42,859 --> 00:37:45,384 I mean, I remember you... 677 00:37:45,428 --> 00:37:47,794 talking about her. 678 00:37:47,831 --> 00:37:52,268 We had the most incredibly romantic time. 679 00:37:52,302 --> 00:37:54,395 I thought we were gonna be together forever, 680 00:37:54,437 --> 00:37:56,735 and then about a week later, right out of the blue, 681 00:37:56,773 --> 00:37:58,434 she sends me a John Deere letter. 682 00:37:58,475 --> 00:38:01,569 - She give you any reason? - Yeah, I called her up. 683 00:38:01,611 --> 00:38:03,306 She gave me a bunch of crap 684 00:38:03,346 --> 00:38:05,678 about me not listening to her enough or something. 685 00:38:05,715 --> 00:38:07,615 I don't know. I wasn't really paying attention. 686 00:38:07,651 --> 00:38:09,585 But the thing that hurt the most 687 00:38:09,619 --> 00:38:12,247 is I think she was seeing another guy. 688 00:38:15,558 --> 00:38:18,857 Never did find out who. 689 00:38:22,299 --> 00:38:24,790 (vacuum whirring) 690 00:38:40,784 --> 00:38:44,447 Mental: Mr. Andre, guess who we just happened upon? 691 00:38:44,487 --> 00:38:47,547 - Yeah. - Man: I had plans. 692 00:38:47,590 --> 00:38:49,455 - Things I wanted to do. - Yeah. 693 00:38:49,492 --> 00:38:51,517 This is where it all ends... at a phone booth. 694 00:38:51,561 --> 00:38:53,392 - (man muttering) - Yeah. The boys are holed up 695 00:38:53,430 --> 00:38:55,295 in a little love-nest for the night. 696 00:38:55,332 --> 00:38:58,028 I think they're a little bit strange. 697 00:38:58,068 --> 00:39:00,662 What the hell are these guys up to? 698 00:39:00,704 --> 00:39:02,934 I mean, is it possible that they could be feds? 699 00:39:02,972 --> 00:39:05,600 Highly unlikely from what I've seen. 700 00:39:05,642 --> 00:39:07,633 Sir, did you ever hear 701 00:39:07,677 --> 00:39:10,612 of the concept of other people? 702 00:39:10,647 --> 00:39:14,640 Um... me being that for the phone, 703 00:39:14,684 --> 00:39:15,946 sir. 704 00:39:15,985 --> 00:39:18,681 Oh, you turned your back on me. 705 00:39:18,722 --> 00:39:21,088 Ho ho ho! He got me mad. I almost like it. 706 00:39:21,124 --> 00:39:23,319 You and Shay were supposed to grab that bag 707 00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:25,487 - so we could end this shit! - Here's your drink, baby. 708 00:39:25,528 --> 00:39:28,964 Do you know the damage I could do to you? 709 00:39:28,998 --> 00:39:32,593 Hold on a minute. 710 00:39:32,635 --> 00:39:34,728 Hmm. 711 00:39:34,771 --> 00:39:36,500 But that's not your problem. 712 00:39:36,539 --> 00:39:38,473 You didn't know. 713 00:39:38,508 --> 00:39:41,204 Get off the phone. 714 00:39:43,079 --> 00:39:46,708 Get off the pho... 715 00:39:49,686 --> 00:39:51,984 I'm sorry, Mr. Andre. You were saying? 716 00:39:52,021 --> 00:39:53,955 Look, Mental, 717 00:39:53,990 --> 00:39:56,652 these jokers have got a lot of money and it belongs to me! 718 00:39:56,693 --> 00:39:59,594 Now, I want to know who they are and what they're doing with it! 719 00:39:59,629 --> 00:40:02,826 Hey hey hey, I told you already. I'm on it. 720 00:40:02,866 --> 00:40:06,063 - All right? - Good. 721 00:40:09,606 --> 00:40:10,355 Harry: According to the map, 722 00:40:10,390 --> 00:40:11,104 Harry: According to the map, 723 00:40:11,141 --> 00:40:12,768 we've only gone about four inches. 724 00:40:12,809 --> 00:40:14,504 You know, I don't think 725 00:40:14,544 --> 00:40:15,977 we have enough gas money. 726 00:40:16,012 --> 00:40:19,470 Relax. We have more than enough. 727 00:40:19,516 --> 00:40:21,484 I think you're wrong, Lloyd. 728 00:40:21,518 --> 00:40:22,815 How much you wanna bet? 729 00:40:22,852 --> 00:40:24,513 I don't bet. 730 00:40:24,554 --> 00:40:25,987 What do you mean, you don't bet? 731 00:40:26,022 --> 00:40:27,717 I mean I don't bet. I don't gamble. 732 00:40:27,757 --> 00:40:29,782 (deep voice) Pussy pussy pussy! 733 00:40:29,826 --> 00:40:32,852 - I never have, and I never will. - Yeah, right! 734 00:40:32,896 --> 00:40:35,626 I'll bet you 20 bucks I can get you gambling 735 00:40:35,665 --> 00:40:37,758 - before the end of the day. - No way. 736 00:40:37,801 --> 00:40:39,462 - I'll give you 3-to-1 odds. - Nope. 737 00:40:39,502 --> 00:40:40,662 - 5-to-1? - Nope. 738 00:40:40,703 --> 00:40:42,898 - 10-to-1? - You're on. 739 00:40:42,939 --> 00:40:45,305 (both chuckle) 740 00:40:46,509 --> 00:40:47,942 I'm going to get you. 741 00:40:47,977 --> 00:40:50,810 - Huh-uh. - Oh, yeah. 742 00:40:50,847 --> 00:40:52,974 I don't know how, but I'm going to get you. 743 00:40:53,016 --> 00:40:56,144 - Yeah. Oh, yeah. - Nuh-uh. 744 00:40:56,186 --> 00:40:57,949 Come on, Joe. Let me do them. 745 00:40:57,987 --> 00:40:59,784 Let me do both of them. 746 00:40:59,823 --> 00:41:01,381 You wouldn't even have to worry about it. 747 00:41:01,424 --> 00:41:02,948 Just shut up! 748 00:41:02,992 --> 00:41:05,119 Now, we don't even know who the hell they are. 749 00:41:05,161 --> 00:41:07,152 You don't kill people you don't know. 750 00:41:07,197 --> 00:41:08,596 That's a rule. 751 00:41:08,631 --> 00:41:09,996 Now, I want you to get up here, 752 00:41:10,033 --> 00:41:11,466 lie down on the front seat. 753 00:41:11,501 --> 00:41:15,403 When they pick me up, you follow us. You got that? 754 00:41:15,438 --> 00:41:17,770 Keep your shirt on. I gotta squeeze a lemon. 755 00:41:24,747 --> 00:41:27,215 Mental: Hey, hey, hey. Here they come. 756 00:41:27,250 --> 00:41:30,014 Stay down, stay down! 757 00:41:40,263 --> 00:41:43,494 Say, uh, are you guys going to Davenport? 758 00:41:43,533 --> 00:41:46,866 My car died, and I'm late for a luncheon. 759 00:41:48,004 --> 00:41:52,168 We usually don't pick up hitchhikers, 760 00:41:52,208 --> 00:41:56,008 but I'm going to go with my instinct on this one. 761 00:41:56,045 --> 00:41:58,513 Saddle up, partner. 762 00:41:59,883 --> 00:42:01,680 You're it. 763 00:42:01,718 --> 00:42:03,743 - You're it. - You're it! Quitsies! 764 00:42:03,786 --> 00:42:05,845 Anti-quitsies. You're it. Quitsies. No anti-quitsies. 765 00:42:05,889 --> 00:42:07,186 - No startsies. - You can't do that. 766 00:42:07,223 --> 00:42:09,191 - Can too. - Cannot. Stamped it. 767 00:42:09,225 --> 00:42:10,749 Can too. Double-stamped it. No erasies. 768 00:42:10,793 --> 00:42:13,091 Cannot. Triple-stamped it. No erasies. 769 00:42:13,129 --> 00:42:15,723 You can't triple-stamp a double-stamp! 770 00:42:15,765 --> 00:42:18,666 You can't triple-stamp a double-stamp, Lloyd! 771 00:42:18,701 --> 00:42:20,692 You can't triple-stamp a double-stamp. Lloyd! Lloyd! 772 00:42:20,737 --> 00:42:22,432 Guys! Enough! 773 00:42:25,942 --> 00:42:30,276 Hey, you wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world? 774 00:42:31,314 --> 00:42:33,748 (screeches) 775 00:42:33,783 --> 00:42:36,809 Guys! Guys! Guys! 776 00:42:38,254 --> 00:42:42,281 Fellas, you think we could 777 00:42:42,325 --> 00:42:44,793 listen to the radio or something? 778 00:42:46,029 --> 00:42:47,997 Radio? (laughs) 779 00:42:48,031 --> 00:42:51,023 Who needs a radio? Ready, Harry? 780 00:42:52,569 --> 00:42:54,264 - # Mock- # - # Yeah # 781 00:42:54,304 --> 00:42:56,238 - # -ing- # - # Yeah # 782 00:42:56,272 --> 00:42:58,570 - # -bird # - # Yeah # 783 00:42:58,608 --> 00:43:00,269 - Lloyd: # Yeah # - # Yeah # 784 00:43:00,310 --> 00:43:02,278 Both: # Mockingbird # 785 00:43:02,312 --> 00:43:05,679 # Don't... everybody, have you heard? # 786 00:43:05,715 --> 00:43:09,014 # She's gonna buy me a mockingbird # 787 00:43:09,052 --> 00:43:13,751 # And if that mockingbird don't sing # 788 00:43:13,790 --> 00:43:17,886 # She's gonna buy me a diamond ring # 789 00:43:17,927 --> 00:43:20,987 # And if that diamond ring don't shine... # 790 00:43:21,030 --> 00:43:22,998 Hey, Lloyd, look! There's some people who want a ride too. 791 00:43:23,032 --> 00:43:24,021 Pick 'em up! 792 00:43:26,603 --> 00:43:28,264 (cows moo) 793 00:43:28,304 --> 00:43:30,101 (playing acoustic guitar) 794 00:43:30,139 --> 00:43:32,630 - Harry and Lloyd: # Mock- # - # S� # 795 00:43:32,675 --> 00:43:34,165 - # -ing- # - # S�# 796 00:43:34,210 --> 00:43:36,269 - # -bird # - # S� # 797 00:43:36,312 --> 00:43:38,542 Harry and Lloyd: # S� # 798 00:43:46,189 --> 00:43:48,987 Harry: You want an atomic pepper, Mr. Mentaliano? 799 00:43:50,760 --> 00:43:53,627 Nah, you guys go ahead. 800 00:43:53,663 --> 00:43:55,893 I'll do it if you will, Lloyd. 801 00:43:55,932 --> 00:43:57,627 Okay. You go first. 802 00:43:57,667 --> 00:43:59,259 No, huh-uh, no, you go first. 803 00:43:59,302 --> 00:44:01,270 - No, you go first. - No, you go first. 804 00:44:01,304 --> 00:44:04,296 - No, you go first. - I always go first! 805 00:44:04,340 --> 00:44:06,672 Why don't you guys both stop acting 806 00:44:06,709 --> 00:44:08,336 like a couple of pussies 807 00:44:08,378 --> 00:44:10,608 and go at the same time, huh? 808 00:44:12,882 --> 00:44:15,612 - That sounds like a dare, Harry. - It's a double-dare. 809 00:44:15,652 --> 00:44:17,244 Yeah, okay, you're on. 810 00:44:18,254 --> 00:44:19,881 Mmm! 811 00:44:24,427 --> 00:44:28,386 - Huh. It's not so bad. - Uh-huh. 812 00:44:28,431 --> 00:44:30,023 Yeah. It's more tingly than hot. 813 00:44:30,066 --> 00:44:32,728 - Yeah. - (coughing) 814 00:44:32,769 --> 00:44:34,634 Agh! 815 00:44:37,173 --> 00:44:40,267 (both screaming, gagging) 816 00:44:43,179 --> 00:44:45,670 Uh, if you fellas would excuse me, 817 00:44:45,715 --> 00:44:47,649 I've got to use the phone. 818 00:44:47,684 --> 00:44:49,675 Enjoy your meal, guys. 819 00:44:49,719 --> 00:44:51,778 (whimpering) 820 00:44:51,821 --> 00:44:53,789 Here, Lloyd, this helps! 821 00:44:53,823 --> 00:44:55,814 Here here. 822 00:44:55,858 --> 00:44:57,382 It... it works good. 823 00:44:57,427 --> 00:44:59,418 Ugh! 824 00:45:04,701 --> 00:45:08,364 Yeah, it's Mental. I'm just sitting down 825 00:45:08,404 --> 00:45:11,271 - to a nice meal with our boys. - Well, how nice for you. 826 00:45:11,307 --> 00:45:13,798 Don't forget that your bread plate is on the left! 827 00:45:13,843 --> 00:45:16,835 Look, I can't have these guys running around Aspen. 828 00:45:16,879 --> 00:45:19,404 Don't worry. They ain't gonna be runnin' around nowhere 829 00:45:19,449 --> 00:45:22,646 after I dump a little rat poison in their Shirley Temple. 830 00:45:25,021 --> 00:45:27,114 ("The Bear Song" playing) 831 00:45:27,156 --> 00:45:30,819 - Good good. - Okay, that's good. 832 00:45:30,860 --> 00:45:33,328 Here he comes. Here he comes. 833 00:45:34,330 --> 00:45:35,820 Feeling better, girls? 834 00:45:35,865 --> 00:45:38,265 Yes, much better. Thank you for asking. 835 00:45:38,301 --> 00:45:42,101 # The other side of the mountain was all that he could see, so! # 836 00:45:42,138 --> 00:45:45,107 # He went back over the mountain to see what he could see, hey! # 837 00:45:45,141 --> 00:45:47,735 So why are you going to Aspen? Vacation? 838 00:45:49,112 --> 00:45:51,307 Why don't you eat up and we'll tell you? 839 00:45:51,347 --> 00:45:52,814 (both snorting) 840 00:45:52,849 --> 00:45:55,010 It just doesn't seem like you packed much. 841 00:45:55,051 --> 00:45:58,111 All I saw was one bag and that briefcase. 842 00:45:58,154 --> 00:46:00,452 Well, no no, the briefcase isn't even ours. 843 00:46:00,490 --> 00:46:02,287 Some lady left it at the airport. 844 00:46:02,325 --> 00:46:04,020 We're just bringing it back to her. 845 00:46:04,060 --> 00:46:05,755 How's your burger? 846 00:46:07,530 --> 00:46:10,795 You mean, you don't even know her? 847 00:46:10,833 --> 00:46:13,267 (laughing) 848 00:46:16,372 --> 00:46:18,863 I mean, 849 00:46:18,908 --> 00:46:23,208 talk about being in the wrong place at the wrong time. 850 00:46:23,246 --> 00:46:26,738 # The bear went over the mountain to see what he could see, hey! # 851 00:46:26,783 --> 00:46:29,843 # The other side of the mountain was all that he could see, so! 852 00:46:29,886 --> 00:46:32,878 # So he went back over the mountain to see what he could see, hey! # 853 00:46:32,922 --> 00:46:35,447 # The other side of the mountain was all the he could see! # 854 00:46:35,491 --> 00:46:37,721 (kettle whistling) 855 00:46:43,800 --> 00:46:46,132 (groaning) 856 00:46:46,169 --> 00:46:48,296 (both laughing) 857 00:46:54,177 --> 00:46:56,441 Are you okay, man? It was just a goof. 858 00:46:56,479 --> 00:46:58,811 Oh, my ulcer! 859 00:46:58,848 --> 00:47:01,339 Quick! My pills! 860 00:47:01,384 --> 00:47:03,852 Waitress: Maybe somebody should call an ambulance. 861 00:47:03,886 --> 00:47:05,183 Look, uh, you get the pills. 862 00:47:05,221 --> 00:47:07,018 Don't worry. I know CPR. 863 00:47:07,056 --> 00:47:08,216 I'll get the pills. 864 00:47:08,257 --> 00:47:10,282 Out with the bad air, in with the good. 865 00:47:10,326 --> 00:47:12,556 - Out with the bad air... - Get off! 866 00:47:16,866 --> 00:47:18,128 Ugh! 867 00:47:20,469 --> 00:47:22,903 Agh, don't! Don't don't! 868 00:47:22,939 --> 00:47:24,236 Back back! 869 00:47:24,273 --> 00:47:27,868 This is a lot easier if you just lay back. 870 00:47:27,910 --> 00:47:30,276 - Here. - He's resisting me! 871 00:47:30,313 --> 00:47:33,544 Here. Here we go, here we go. 872 00:47:33,583 --> 00:47:35,483 - Lloyd: Pills! - There you go! There you go. 873 00:47:35,518 --> 00:47:37,418 - Pills are good! - Take 'em down. 874 00:47:37,453 --> 00:47:39,478 - Pills are good! - Drink 'em down. 875 00:47:39,522 --> 00:47:41,251 There you go. 876 00:47:41,290 --> 00:47:43,155 - There you go, big guy. - That's better! 877 00:47:43,192 --> 00:47:45,160 You want some ketchup and mustard? 878 00:47:45,194 --> 00:47:48,254 That helped us. 879 00:47:50,333 --> 00:47:53,791 Son of a bitch! (gurgling) 880 00:48:03,246 --> 00:48:05,305 Check, please. 881 00:48:08,351 --> 00:48:09,943 I can't believe it. 882 00:48:09,986 --> 00:48:12,284 Life's a fragile thing, Harr. 883 00:48:12,321 --> 00:48:15,222 One minute you're chewing on a burger, 884 00:48:15,258 --> 00:48:17,522 the next minute you're dead meat. 885 00:48:17,560 --> 00:48:19,994 But he blamed me. You heard him. 886 00:48:20,029 --> 00:48:21,894 Those were his last words. 887 00:48:23,399 --> 00:48:25,560 Not if you count the gurgling sound. 888 00:48:29,572 --> 00:48:32,439 - You mean he was poisoned? - No doubt about it. 889 00:48:32,475 --> 00:48:35,603 We found these next to the body. 890 00:48:35,645 --> 00:48:37,545 - Sir. - Yeah? 891 00:48:37,580 --> 00:48:40,310 Waitress says he came in with a couple of younger guys. 892 00:48:40,349 --> 00:48:43,648 Now they're the ones who called the ambulance, and then they hit the road. 893 00:48:43,686 --> 00:48:46,416 - Get any idea where they were going? - We just received a report 894 00:48:46,455 --> 00:48:49,447 that they were seen headed west on l-80 towards Colorado. 895 00:48:49,492 --> 00:48:51,585 Did you get a make on the vehicle? 896 00:48:53,362 --> 00:48:55,023 Uh, yes, sir. 897 00:48:55,064 --> 00:48:59,501 They're driving an '84... sheepdog. 898 00:48:59,535 --> 00:49:00,818 (rock music playing) 899 00:49:00,853 --> 00:49:02,101 (rock music playing) 900 00:49:02,138 --> 00:49:04,606 (tires screech) 901 00:49:16,285 --> 00:49:18,378 - # Take... # - (snoring) 902 00:49:18,421 --> 00:49:24,087 # Take a picture, take a little time # 903 00:49:24,126 --> 00:49:26,390 # No need to dig through the dumpster # 904 00:49:26,429 --> 00:49:29,956 # For all the stuff you thought that you'd left behind... # 905 00:49:32,668 --> 00:49:35,034 # Take my car # 906 00:49:35,071 --> 00:49:37,699 # Drive it to the outside world # 907 00:49:37,740 --> 00:49:42,074 # Take it far, farther now from me # 908 00:49:42,111 --> 00:49:43,373 # Take it all # 909 00:49:43,412 --> 00:49:46,176 # Happy, girl, the fact is # 910 00:49:46,215 --> 00:49:48,080 # Take my heart # 911 00:49:48,117 --> 00:49:51,382 # Take take take me apart. # 912 00:49:57,126 --> 00:49:58,559 Skis, huh? 913 00:49:58,594 --> 00:50:00,084 That's right. 914 00:50:00,129 --> 00:50:02,097 Great. 915 00:50:02,131 --> 00:50:04,361 They yours? 916 00:50:05,601 --> 00:50:07,330 Uh-huh. 917 00:50:10,072 --> 00:50:11,835 Both of 'em? 918 00:50:13,609 --> 00:50:15,474 Yeah. 919 00:50:15,511 --> 00:50:19,345 Cool. 920 00:50:21,617 --> 00:50:24,085 Um, excuse me, but you're, uh... 921 00:50:24,120 --> 00:50:26,418 you're spraying everywhere. 922 00:50:27,456 --> 00:50:28,946 Oh! 923 00:50:30,426 --> 00:50:34,294 (whistling, urinating) 924 00:50:49,345 --> 00:50:51,313 (door opens) 925 00:50:51,347 --> 00:50:53,338 (door closes) 926 00:50:53,382 --> 00:50:55,873 (footsteps approach) 927 00:50:57,620 --> 00:50:59,611 (zips pants) 928 00:51:10,132 --> 00:51:12,760 (door rattling) 929 00:51:18,340 --> 00:51:22,208 - (screams) - Oh, man, you gotta be shitting me. 930 00:51:22,244 --> 00:51:25,008 If it ain't my old friend! 931 00:51:26,549 --> 00:51:29,985 And right on time. 932 00:51:33,656 --> 00:51:35,624 (whimpering) 933 00:51:38,828 --> 00:51:42,093 That's a lot of luggage for a little vacation. 934 00:51:42,131 --> 00:51:44,156 - I'm moving to Aspen. - Oh. 935 00:51:44,200 --> 00:51:47,226 I've got to get away from my boyfriend. He's such a klutz. 936 00:51:47,269 --> 00:51:50,067 Plus, my astrologer told me that I really should stay away 937 00:51:50,106 --> 00:51:52,404 from accident-prone guys, so, you know. 938 00:51:52,441 --> 00:51:54,068 Oh, well, you know, I... 939 00:51:57,279 --> 00:52:00,510 Here. It's a little loose. You might want to... 940 00:52:00,549 --> 00:52:03,643 - Mm. Thank you. - Oh, no. Hey, no, allow me. 941 00:52:03,686 --> 00:52:05,654 I've got a thing of... 942 00:52:05,688 --> 00:52:08,122 here. Got 'em right here. Right here. 943 00:52:13,662 --> 00:52:15,823 - (gasoline ignites) - Thank you. 944 00:52:15,865 --> 00:52:18,834 Sure. You know, I'm heading up to Aspen myself. 945 00:52:18,868 --> 00:52:20,563 Maybe we could, you know, meet up, 946 00:52:20,603 --> 00:52:22,628 have some hot chocolate or something. 947 00:52:23,873 --> 00:52:26,364 Sure, why not? You seem harmless. 948 00:52:26,408 --> 00:52:27,773 I'm going to give you my number. 949 00:52:27,810 --> 00:52:29,641 - Let me find a pen though. - Great! 950 00:52:29,678 --> 00:52:31,839 - Let's see. - That's... ah! 951 00:52:31,881 --> 00:52:34,145 - I know I have one in here somewhere. - Look, why don't you 952 00:52:34,183 --> 00:52:36,117 just tell it to me? I got a really good memory. 953 00:52:36,152 --> 00:52:38,313 - Well, the number's 555... - 555. 954 00:52:38,354 --> 00:52:41,346 905... wait a minute. That's my old number. 955 00:52:41,390 --> 00:52:43,620 That is so weird how your mind just goes blank. 956 00:52:43,659 --> 00:52:46,492 For God's sakes, just give me the damn number! 957 00:52:46,529 --> 00:52:50,124 Okay, look, uh, you gonna get pushy, forget about it. 958 00:52:56,639 --> 00:52:58,800 Find a happy place. 959 00:52:58,841 --> 00:53:01,901 Find a happy place. Find a happy place. 960 00:53:01,944 --> 00:53:04,504 I'll show you a happy place. 961 00:53:05,514 --> 00:53:08,449 Here's your happy place. 962 00:53:15,958 --> 00:53:18,256 - (yells) - (groans) 963 00:53:18,294 --> 00:53:20,922 (panting) 964 00:53:37,780 --> 00:53:40,340 (whimpers) 965 00:53:40,382 --> 00:53:43,818 (police radio chattering) 966 00:53:43,852 --> 00:53:45,945 Man: Move those cars! Move it! Move it! 967 00:53:52,261 --> 00:53:54,195 Go around, man. Go around. 968 00:53:54,230 --> 00:53:56,926 More flags over here! 969 00:53:56,966 --> 00:53:58,900 All right, any sign of them yet? 970 00:53:58,934 --> 00:54:00,925 No, sir, but we're expecting them shortly. 971 00:54:00,970 --> 00:54:04,098 A motorist saw a pooch about 30 miles back headed this way. 972 00:54:08,644 --> 00:54:12,273 Look, I told you what happened, okay? So just drop it. 973 00:54:12,314 --> 00:54:14,441 Yeah, okay. Sure thing, Lloyd. Sure thing. 974 00:54:14,483 --> 00:54:16,951 I promise not to mention another word 975 00:54:16,986 --> 00:54:19,454 about you being in a bathroom 976 00:54:19,488 --> 00:54:21,456 with a 6'4" trucker with his pants down. 977 00:54:21,490 --> 00:54:23,890 (laughs) 978 00:54:31,634 --> 00:54:34,000 Hey, look. We're almost in Colorado. 979 00:54:34,036 --> 00:54:36,266 What do you say we change seats? 980 00:54:36,305 --> 00:54:38,535 I've been driving for nine straight hours. 981 00:54:38,574 --> 00:54:41,543 I don't have the energy to start a new state. 982 00:54:41,577 --> 00:54:43,477 Why should I do you any favors? 983 00:54:43,512 --> 00:54:46,572 I'll let you kiss me. (laughs) 984 00:54:46,615 --> 00:54:48,583 I swear... 985 00:54:48,617 --> 00:54:50,881 I'm gonna... I will take your... 986 00:54:50,919 --> 00:54:53,479 I'm... I swear to God I'm gonna take your... 987 00:54:53,522 --> 00:54:56,355 - Aw, come on... - Don't touch me. 988 00:54:56,392 --> 00:54:58,622 (mocking) Oh, okay. 989 00:55:02,331 --> 00:55:05,061 I'm done. Okay, enough. 990 00:55:07,303 --> 00:55:10,067 (mimics truck horn, giggling) 991 00:55:14,043 --> 00:55:16,273 (laughing) 992 00:55:17,913 --> 00:55:20,541 Hey, guys. Whoa, Big Gulps, huh? 993 00:55:20,582 --> 00:55:22,277 All right. 994 00:55:22,318 --> 00:55:24,946 Well, see you later. 995 00:55:26,889 --> 00:55:28,823 - (snoring) - Hey, Harry, 996 00:55:28,857 --> 00:55:30,757 I got some beef jerk... 997 00:55:35,331 --> 00:55:38,994 Some people just weren't cut out for life on the road. 998 00:55:39,034 --> 00:55:41,298 ("Crash" playing) 999 00:55:41,337 --> 00:55:44,534 # Here you go, way too fast # 1000 00:55:44,573 --> 00:55:47,007 # Don't slow down, you're gonna crash # 1001 00:55:47,042 --> 00:55:50,375 # You should watch, watch your step # 1002 00:55:50,412 --> 00:55:52,710 # Don't look out, gonna break your neck # 1003 00:55:52,748 --> 00:55:55,740 # So shut, shut your mouth # 1004 00:55:55,784 --> 00:55:58,412 # 'Cause I'm not listening anyhow # 1005 00:55:58,454 --> 00:56:01,321 # I've had enough, enough of you # 1006 00:56:01,357 --> 00:56:04,326 # Enough to last a lifetime through # 1007 00:56:04,360 --> 00:56:06,089 # With you # 1008 00:56:06,128 --> 00:56:10,155 (fades) # You. # 1009 00:56:11,500 --> 00:56:13,434 Hey! 1010 00:56:13,469 --> 00:56:17,064 I was wondering when you were gonna get up. 1011 00:56:17,106 --> 00:56:18,903 Ha! 1012 00:56:18,941 --> 00:56:21,876 Well, how long have I been out? 1013 00:56:23,045 --> 00:56:26,173 I'd say a good five hours. 1014 00:56:30,753 --> 00:56:33,551 Huh! I expected the Rocky Mountains 1015 00:56:33,589 --> 00:56:36,717 to be a little rockier than this. 1016 00:56:36,759 --> 00:56:39,557 I was thinking the same thing. 1017 00:56:39,595 --> 00:56:43,087 That John Denver's full of shit, man. 1018 00:56:46,902 --> 00:56:49,132 I'm only human, Harry! 1019 00:56:49,171 --> 00:56:52,607 Anybody can make a mistake. 1020 00:56:52,641 --> 00:56:56,008 Come on, stop being a baby! 1021 00:56:56,044 --> 00:56:58,569 So we backtracked a tad! 1022 00:56:58,614 --> 00:57:00,514 A tad?! 1023 00:57:00,549 --> 00:57:02,642 A tad, Lloyd? 1024 00:57:02,684 --> 00:57:05,744 You drove almost 1/6 of the way 1025 00:57:05,788 --> 00:57:09,121 across the country in the wrong direction! 1026 00:57:10,893 --> 00:57:13,418 Now we don't have enough money to get to Aspen! 1027 00:57:13,462 --> 00:57:15,123 We don't have enough money to get home! 1028 00:57:15,164 --> 00:57:17,655 We don't have enough money to eat! 1029 00:57:17,699 --> 00:57:20,327 We don't have enough money to sleep! 1030 00:57:21,603 --> 00:57:23,901 Well, it's not gonna do us any good 1031 00:57:23,939 --> 00:57:25,770 to sit here whining about it. 1032 00:57:25,808 --> 00:57:27,901 - We're in a hole. - ("Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm" playing) 1033 00:57:27,943 --> 00:57:30,411 We're just going to have to dig ourselves out. 1034 00:57:31,947 --> 00:57:33,642 Okay, all right. You're right. 1035 00:57:33,682 --> 00:57:35,582 You're absolutely right, Lloyd. 1036 00:57:35,617 --> 00:57:37,915 - # Mmm mmm mmm mmm # - Where're you going? 1037 00:57:37,953 --> 00:57:41,650 - # Mmm mmm mmm mmm # - Home. I'm walking home. 1038 00:57:41,690 --> 00:57:46,184 Oh, well, pardon me, Mr. Perfect! 1039 00:57:46,228 --> 00:57:47,991 I guess I forgot 1040 00:57:48,030 --> 00:57:50,658 that you never, ever make a mistake! 1041 00:57:50,699 --> 00:57:53,759 (singer vocalizing) 1042 00:58:14,656 --> 00:58:17,147 Lloyd: Harry! 1043 00:58:17,192 --> 00:58:18,887 Harry! 1044 00:58:18,927 --> 00:58:21,623 Harry! 1045 00:58:21,663 --> 00:58:23,927 Harry! Wait up! 1046 00:58:25,000 --> 00:58:27,332 - (engine backfires) - (yells) 1047 00:58:34,176 --> 00:58:36,474 (bell rings) 1048 00:58:36,512 --> 00:58:38,480 (bird cawing) 1049 00:58:38,514 --> 00:58:41,483 Got room for one more if you still want to go to Aspen. 1050 00:58:41,517 --> 00:58:43,644 Where did you find that? 1051 00:58:43,685 --> 00:58:46,210 Some kid back in town. 1052 00:58:46,255 --> 00:58:48,951 Traded the van for it straight up. 1053 00:58:48,991 --> 00:58:52,154 I can get 70 miles to the gallon on this hog. 1054 00:58:57,599 --> 00:59:00,033 You know, Lloyd, just when I think 1055 00:59:00,068 --> 00:59:03,595 you couldn't possibly be any dumber, 1056 00:59:03,639 --> 00:59:07,837 you go and do something like this... 1057 00:59:07,876 --> 00:59:11,710 and totally redeem yourself! 1058 00:59:11,747 --> 00:59:14,944 Ha ha! 1059 00:59:14,983 --> 00:59:17,213 - Still wanna go to Aspen? - Oh, yeah! 1060 00:59:17,252 --> 00:59:20,915 - Okay, let's go, buddy! - Super! 1061 00:59:20,956 --> 00:59:23,823 - (bell rings) - ("Where I Find My Heaven" playing) 1062 00:59:23,859 --> 00:59:27,795 - Lloyd, no! West! Go west, Lloyd! - Oh! Oh, yeah. 1063 00:59:36,672 --> 00:59:39,766 # Hey, Monday morning # 1064 00:59:39,808 --> 00:59:43,209 # Is only for the brave # 1065 00:59:43,245 --> 00:59:46,874 # And the blood flows through my heart and veins # 1066 00:59:46,915 --> 00:59:50,578 # Like sand as I shave # 1067 00:59:50,619 --> 00:59:53,884 # And the wind outside # 1068 00:59:53,922 --> 00:59:56,652 # And the taxi's ready... # 1069 00:59:56,692 --> 00:59:59,661 - (horn honks) - # And the lonesome hum # 1070 00:59:59,695 --> 01:00:01,993 # That comes from my desk lamp # 1071 01:00:02,030 --> 01:00:05,796 # Is where I find my heaven # 1072 01:00:05,834 --> 01:00:11,204 # It's where I find my heaven... # 1073 01:00:12,941 --> 01:00:15,341 I've got to... I've got to stop 1074 01:00:15,377 --> 01:00:17,572 to go to the bathroom. 1075 01:00:17,613 --> 01:00:20,013 Just go, man. 1076 01:00:21,350 --> 01:00:23,147 Oh! 1077 01:00:24,987 --> 01:00:27,217 That sure is warm. 1078 01:00:31,627 --> 01:00:34,118 # It's where I find my heaven # 1079 01:00:34,162 --> 01:00:37,859 - # It's where I find my heaven # - # Where I find my... # 1080 01:00:37,899 --> 01:00:40,094 # It's where I find my heaven... # 1081 01:00:40,135 --> 01:00:42,865 (truck horn honks) 1082 01:00:42,904 --> 01:00:46,635 # Heav... # 1083 01:00:46,675 --> 01:00:51,476 # Heaven. # 1084 01:00:59,888 --> 01:01:02,948 (both shivering) 1085 01:01:08,230 --> 01:01:10,562 (bell tolling) 1086 01:01:28,417 --> 01:01:30,908 We're there. 1087 01:01:38,393 --> 01:01:40,327 Got a little nippy 1088 01:01:40,362 --> 01:01:43,331 going through the pass back there. 1089 01:01:45,767 --> 01:01:48,361 Lloyd: Isn't this incredible? 1090 01:01:48,403 --> 01:01:51,372 - What more could two single guys want? - How about some food? 1091 01:01:51,406 --> 01:01:54,375 I swallowed a big June bug when we were driving. 1092 01:01:54,409 --> 01:01:55,899 I'm not really hungry. 1093 01:01:55,944 --> 01:01:57,878 Well, I'm starving. 1094 01:01:57,913 --> 01:02:01,007 Ho... Jeez, look at the butt on that. 1095 01:02:01,049 --> 01:02:03,108 Lloyd: Yeah. 1096 01:02:03,151 --> 01:02:05,984 He must work out. 1097 01:02:06,021 --> 01:02:08,080 Hey! Why don't we get busy 1098 01:02:08,123 --> 01:02:09,988 and deliver the briefcase to Mary? 1099 01:02:10,025 --> 01:02:11,754 If I know her as well as I think I do 1100 01:02:11,793 --> 01:02:13,988 she'll invite us right in for tea and strumpets. 1101 01:02:14,029 --> 01:02:16,088 Good plan. Where does she live? 1102 01:02:16,131 --> 01:02:18,031 I don't know. 1103 01:02:18,066 --> 01:02:20,728 What's her last name? I'll look it up. 1104 01:02:20,769 --> 01:02:22,703 Uh... 1105 01:02:22,738 --> 01:02:26,230 You know, I don't really recall. 1106 01:02:26,274 --> 01:02:28,105 Starts with an "S." 1107 01:02:28,143 --> 01:02:32,341 S-swim, Swamie, S-slippy, Slappy, 1108 01:02:32,380 --> 01:02:35,042 Slimin, Solmon, Simin, Sal, 1109 01:02:35,083 --> 01:02:36,243 Swenson, Swanson? 1110 01:02:36,284 --> 01:02:38,081 Maybe it's on the briefcase. 1111 01:02:38,120 --> 01:02:39,985 Oh, yeah! It's right here. 1112 01:02:40,021 --> 01:02:42,421 Samsonite! I was way off. 1113 01:02:42,457 --> 01:02:44,721 I knew it started with an "S" though. 1114 01:02:46,161 --> 01:02:48,254 I'm not seeing it here, Lloyd. 1115 01:02:48,296 --> 01:02:50,560 She must be unlisted. 1116 01:02:53,235 --> 01:02:55,203 Great. 1117 01:02:55,237 --> 01:02:57,467 So what are we supposed to do now? 1118 01:02:57,506 --> 01:03:00,998 (fox howls) 1119 01:03:01,042 --> 01:03:05,103 - I can't feel my fi-fingers anymore. - (wind whistling) 1120 01:03:05,147 --> 01:03:08,139 They're-they're- they're numb. 1121 01:03:09,851 --> 01:03:12,979 Ooh. Maybe you should wear these extra gloves. 1122 01:03:13,021 --> 01:03:15,956 My hands are starting to get sweaty. 1123 01:03:15,991 --> 01:03:19,188 Extra gloves? 1124 01:03:19,227 --> 01:03:21,525 You've had this pair 1125 01:03:21,563 --> 01:03:24,327 of extra gloves this whole time? 1126 01:03:25,967 --> 01:03:28,367 Yeah. We're in the Rockies. 1127 01:03:30,972 --> 01:03:32,735 I'm going to kill you. 1128 01:03:33,942 --> 01:03:36,467 - What? - I'm gonna kill you! 1129 01:03:36,511 --> 01:03:39,810 - I'm gonna kill you, Lloyd! - Calm down! 1130 01:03:39,848 --> 01:03:41,372 Right now, I'm gonna kill you! 1131 01:03:41,416 --> 01:03:43,748 Harry, you got that crazy look in your eye! 1132 01:03:45,353 --> 01:03:49,312 (chuckles) I know what I'm going to do. 1133 01:03:49,357 --> 01:03:51,484 - What are you doing? - I'm going to do something 1134 01:03:51,526 --> 01:03:54,051 I should have done a long time ago. 1135 01:03:55,063 --> 01:03:56,860 Don't do anything foolish, Harry! 1136 01:03:56,898 --> 01:03:59,230 What? Foolish? This isn't foolish! 1137 01:03:59,267 --> 01:04:01,565 I'm going to toss this damn curse 1138 01:04:01,603 --> 01:04:03,901 right into that damn pond! 1139 01:04:03,939 --> 01:04:05,668 Aah! 1140 01:04:07,175 --> 01:04:10,372 - I'm going to do it! - No, Harry! 1141 01:04:12,314 --> 01:04:15,215 (screams) Harry! 1142 01:04:15,250 --> 01:04:17,844 Your hands are freezing! 1143 01:04:17,886 --> 01:04:20,286 Aah! Ugh! 1144 01:04:20,322 --> 01:04:22,586 Harry, look! 1145 01:04:22,624 --> 01:04:25,320 Look! Look! 1146 01:04:30,098 --> 01:04:32,396 Okay, here's the plan: 1147 01:04:32,434 --> 01:04:35,301 We borrow a few bucks... just a small loan from the briefcase 1148 01:04:35,337 --> 01:04:38,363 - and we find some reasonable lodgings. - Good plan. 1149 01:04:38,406 --> 01:04:41,102 And we'll keep track of all the money we spend with IOUs. 1150 01:04:41,142 --> 01:04:43,372 We'll be meticulous, right down to the last penny. 1151 01:04:43,411 --> 01:04:45,845 - Whatever we borrow, we pay back. - Absolutely. 1152 01:04:45,881 --> 01:04:48,281 - We're good for it. - Our word is our bond. 1153 01:04:49,985 --> 01:04:51,976 This is the Hotel Danbury 1154 01:04:52,020 --> 01:04:53,988 Presidential Suite, gentlemen, 1155 01:04:54,022 --> 01:04:56,013 normally reserved for royalty, 1156 01:04:56,057 --> 01:04:57,854 visiting dignitaries, 1157 01:04:57,893 --> 01:05:00,293 illustrious stars of stage and screen. 1158 01:05:00,328 --> 01:05:03,855 We have shortly coming the Emperor and Empress of Japan, 1159 01:05:03,899 --> 01:05:06,868 and of course, Princess Charles and Di when they were together 1160 01:05:06,902 --> 01:05:08,893 used to frequent the hotel constantly. 1161 01:05:08,937 --> 01:05:10,427 We'll take it! 1162 01:05:10,472 --> 01:05:12,804 - (engine revs) - ("You Sexy Thing" playing) 1163 01:05:19,447 --> 01:05:23,042 # I believe in miracles, baby # 1164 01:05:23,084 --> 01:05:26,485 # Since you came along, you sexy thing # 1165 01:05:26,521 --> 01:05:28,512 # You sexy thing, you # 1166 01:05:28,556 --> 01:05:31,650 # I believe in miracles, baby # 1167 01:05:31,693 --> 01:05:34,287 # Since you came along # 1168 01:05:34,329 --> 01:05:38,561 - # You sexy thing # - # You sexy thing, you... # 1169 01:05:40,068 --> 01:05:41,797 There you go. 1170 01:05:43,471 --> 01:05:45,439 - There you go. - Thank you, sir. 1171 01:05:45,473 --> 01:05:47,407 - There you go. - Thank you, sir. 1172 01:05:47,442 --> 01:05:49,103 - There you go. - Thank you, sir. 1173 01:05:49,144 --> 01:05:51,544 There you go. 1174 01:05:53,448 --> 01:05:55,313 Hi. 1175 01:05:55,350 --> 01:05:57,079 (both sobbing) 1176 01:05:57,118 --> 01:05:59,552 Narrator on TV: Rain brought them to him. 1177 01:05:59,587 --> 01:06:01,452 Girl on TV: My mother was Sarah Carver. 1178 01:06:01,489 --> 01:06:03,684 Narrator: Although at the time, he wasn't sure 1179 01:06:03,725 --> 01:06:05,989 he wanted to accept the gift. 1180 01:06:06,027 --> 01:06:08,393 Girl on TV: Nick, do you think he'll let us stay? 1181 01:06:08,430 --> 01:06:10,455 Nick on TV: No, this place is ugly, anyway. 1182 01:06:10,498 --> 01:06:13,592 You and me, we're a family. 1183 01:06:13,635 --> 01:06:16,160 Man: I promise never to give you away. 1184 01:06:16,204 --> 01:06:19,037 And no one's ever going to break us apart. 1185 01:06:19,074 --> 01:06:22,237 At Pacific Bell, we believe that's pretty special. 1186 01:06:22,277 --> 01:06:23,924 - Wow! Boy, this is livin', huh? - Yeah. 1187 01:06:23,959 --> 01:06:25,571 - Wow! Boy, this is livin', huh? - Yeah. 1188 01:06:25,613 --> 01:06:28,138 - What's on next? - I don't know. 1189 01:06:28,183 --> 01:06:30,413 Let me look it up. 1190 01:06:30,452 --> 01:06:32,317 Ah! 1191 01:06:32,354 --> 01:06:34,379 Lloyd, you okay? 1192 01:06:34,422 --> 01:06:36,515 Harry, it's Mary! 1193 01:06:36,558 --> 01:06:38,355 It's who? 1194 01:06:38,393 --> 01:06:40,520 Mary with the briefcase. 1195 01:06:40,562 --> 01:06:43,725 Mary Swanson. 1196 01:06:43,765 --> 01:06:46,165 Swanson! 1197 01:06:46,201 --> 01:06:49,398 - Wool hast anool... - "Host annual." 1198 01:06:49,437 --> 01:06:53,134 - Host anewl... annual... - Annual. 1199 01:06:53,174 --> 01:06:54,971 "Annual meeting of..." 1200 01:06:55,010 --> 01:06:56,978 t-t-t-heh... 1201 01:06:57,012 --> 01:06:58,536 t-he... t-he... 1202 01:06:58,580 --> 01:07:00,445 - The. - Oh. 1203 01:07:00,482 --> 01:07:03,542 - "The Inter..." (sighs) - Yeah. It's a big one. 1204 01:07:03,585 --> 01:07:06,611 "International Preservation Society tomorrow night." 1205 01:07:06,654 --> 01:07:09,521 ("Oh, Pretty Woman" playing) 1206 01:07:09,557 --> 01:07:11,286 Well, come on, Cinderella. 1207 01:07:11,326 --> 01:07:14,193 We've got to get you ready for the ball! 1208 01:07:21,136 --> 01:07:24,594 # Pretty woman, walking down the street # 1209 01:07:24,639 --> 01:07:28,405 # Pretty woman, the kind I like to meet # 1210 01:07:28,443 --> 01:07:31,003 # Pretty woman # 1211 01:07:31,046 --> 01:07:34,709 # I don't believe you, you're not the truth # 1212 01:07:34,749 --> 01:07:39,015 # No one could look as good as you... # 1213 01:07:41,189 --> 01:07:42,713 - (grinding) - # Mercy! # 1214 01:07:46,227 --> 01:07:50,095 # Pretty woman, won't you pardon me? # 1215 01:07:50,131 --> 01:07:54,067 # Pretty woman, I couldn't help but see # 1216 01:07:54,102 --> 01:07:56,662 # Pretty woman # 1217 01:07:56,704 --> 01:08:00,470 # That you look lovely as can be # 1218 01:08:00,508 --> 01:08:06,344 # Are you lonely just like me? # 1219 01:08:06,381 --> 01:08:08,872 (singer growls) 1220 01:08:12,821 --> 01:08:16,757 # Pretty woman, stop awhile # 1221 01:08:16,791 --> 01:08:20,488 # Pretty woman, talk awhile # 1222 01:08:20,528 --> 01:08:27,457 # Pretty woman, give your smile to me # 1223 01:08:27,502 --> 01:08:31,666 # Pretty woman, yeah yeah yeah # 1224 01:08:31,706 --> 01:08:35,403 - (scissors snipping) - # Pretty woman, look my way # 1225 01:08:35,443 --> 01:08:40,005 # Pretty woman, say you'll stay with me... # 1226 01:08:41,883 --> 01:08:45,080 # 'Cause I need you # 1227 01:08:45,120 --> 01:08:48,385 - # I'll treat you right... # - (loud buzzing) 1228 01:08:48,423 --> 01:08:52,382 # Come with me, baby # 1229 01:08:52,427 --> 01:08:55,362 # Be mine tonight... # 1230 01:08:55,396 --> 01:08:57,762 Yeah! 1231 01:09:00,635 --> 01:09:01,669 # Pretty woman. # 1232 01:09:02,737 --> 01:09:04,830 (lounge music playing) 1233 01:09:06,674 --> 01:09:08,665 Thanks, Barn. There you go. 1234 01:09:08,710 --> 01:09:10,701 Thank you, sir. 1235 01:09:27,362 --> 01:09:28,886 Okay okay okay. 1236 01:09:28,930 --> 01:09:30,454 - Ha! - Cripes! 1237 01:09:30,498 --> 01:09:32,693 Yes! Yes! Yes! 1238 01:09:36,571 --> 01:09:38,038 Agh! 1239 01:09:39,407 --> 01:09:42,171 - Time out! - Okay. 1240 01:09:42,210 --> 01:09:45,646 Excuse me. Gentlemen, this is a $500-a-plate dinner. 1241 01:09:45,680 --> 01:09:49,172 - Good night. - Oh, 500... oh, okay. No problem. 1242 01:09:49,217 --> 01:09:52,243 Here. Put us down for... put us down for four. 1243 01:09:52,287 --> 01:09:54,448 In case we want seconds. 1244 01:09:55,757 --> 01:09:58,021 (inhales sharply) 1245 01:10:00,828 --> 01:10:03,353 Jesus Christ. It's them. 1246 01:10:03,398 --> 01:10:04,922 - Them who? - Them, 1247 01:10:04,966 --> 01:10:07,628 the guys who whacked Mental. 1248 01:10:08,670 --> 01:10:10,262 Can't you just feel it, Harry? 1249 01:10:10,305 --> 01:10:11,932 This is our big chance, man. 1250 01:10:11,973 --> 01:10:13,736 All we gotta do 1251 01:10:13,775 --> 01:10:16,243 is show a little class, a little sophistication, 1252 01:10:16,277 --> 01:10:18,302 and we're in like a dirty shirt. 1253 01:10:18,346 --> 01:10:20,780 That's no problem, Lloyd. We can be classy and sophistic... 1254 01:10:20,815 --> 01:10:22,783 oh, look at the funbags on that hosehound. 1255 01:10:22,817 --> 01:10:25,285 I'd like to eat her liver with some fava beans 1256 01:10:25,320 --> 01:10:27,288 and a nice bottle of Chianti. 1257 01:10:27,322 --> 01:10:29,654 (both mimic Hannibal Lecter) 1258 01:10:29,691 --> 01:10:32,524 Come on, let's go get a couple bowls of loudmouth soup. 1259 01:10:32,560 --> 01:10:34,289 Yeah. 1260 01:10:34,329 --> 01:10:36,422 Hey, bartender, 1261 01:10:36,464 --> 01:10:38,659 - two martinis, please. - Yes, sir. Right away. 1262 01:10:38,700 --> 01:10:41,669 Nicholas: Ladies and gentlemen, can I have your attention, please? 1263 01:10:41,703 --> 01:10:43,796 The Aspen Preservation Society 1264 01:10:43,838 --> 01:10:45,863 is the world's foremost defender 1265 01:10:45,907 --> 01:10:48,899 of 23 endangered species, 1266 01:10:48,943 --> 01:10:51,434 and it is with tremendous honor 1267 01:10:51,479 --> 01:10:54,243 that we're able to bring Mr. Swanson forward 1268 01:10:54,282 --> 01:10:56,648 to introduce us to the 24th. Everybody... 1269 01:10:56,684 --> 01:10:58,618 Karl. 1270 01:10:58,653 --> 01:11:00,814 Thank you, Nick. 1271 01:11:02,857 --> 01:11:04,791 Thank you. 1272 01:11:04,826 --> 01:11:06,623 Ladies and gentlemen, 1273 01:11:06,661 --> 01:11:09,653 I give you the Icelandic snow owl. 1274 01:11:09,697 --> 01:11:13,463 (drum roll) 1275 01:11:13,501 --> 01:11:14,695 (cymbals crash) 1276 01:11:14,736 --> 01:11:17,296 (applause) 1277 01:11:17,338 --> 01:11:20,796 These magnificent specimens constitute one seventh 1278 01:11:20,842 --> 01:11:23,675 of the snow owl population left on the planet. 1279 01:11:23,711 --> 01:11:26,646 And God willing, with your help 1280 01:11:26,681 --> 01:11:28,740 and that of the Society's, 1281 01:11:28,783 --> 01:11:31,946 these wonderful creatures will flourish once more. 1282 01:11:31,986 --> 01:11:35,183 Thank you again and enjoy your evening. 1283 01:11:37,792 --> 01:11:40,022 Can I have some pistachios, please? 1284 01:11:41,963 --> 01:11:43,828 And another one of those. 1285 01:11:43,865 --> 01:11:46,265 Lloyd, what are you doing? Would you calm down? 1286 01:11:46,301 --> 01:11:48,769 I've never seen you so nervous. 1287 01:11:48,803 --> 01:11:52,534 Keep an eye on 'em, Shay. Keep a close eye. 1288 01:11:52,573 --> 01:11:54,734 I'm ready for a commitment, Harry. 1289 01:11:54,776 --> 01:11:57,609 The first time I set eyes on Mary Swanson, 1290 01:11:57,645 --> 01:12:01,308 I just got that old-fashioned romantic feeling 1291 01:12:01,349 --> 01:12:03,613 where I'd do anything to bone her. 1292 01:12:03,651 --> 01:12:05,744 That's a special feeling, Lloyd. 1293 01:12:05,787 --> 01:12:07,778 - Yeah. - Yeah. 1294 01:12:07,822 --> 01:12:10,882 Oh my, there she is. 1295 01:12:10,925 --> 01:12:13,291 Wow! You weren't kidding, Lloyd. 1296 01:12:13,328 --> 01:12:15,990 She's an angel! (whistles) 1297 01:12:16,998 --> 01:12:18,761 Well, what are you waiting for? 1298 01:12:18,800 --> 01:12:21,633 Get over there and talk to her. 1299 01:12:25,473 --> 01:12:27,805 She's just going to think I'm some kind of a psycho 1300 01:12:27,842 --> 01:12:30,072 when she finds out how far I came just to see her! 1301 01:12:30,111 --> 01:12:31,976 You know what you have?! Her briefcase! 1302 01:12:32,013 --> 01:12:35,005 She's gonna be thrilled to see you. 1303 01:12:35,049 --> 01:12:38,348 Wait. I have an idea. 1304 01:12:39,620 --> 01:12:41,952 Why don't you go over 1305 01:12:41,989 --> 01:12:43,923 and introduce yourself? 1306 01:12:43,958 --> 01:12:45,926 And that way, you can build me up 1307 01:12:45,960 --> 01:12:47,928 so I won't have to brag about myself later. 1308 01:12:47,962 --> 01:12:49,896 Tell her I'm rich 1309 01:12:49,931 --> 01:12:52,399 and, uh, I'm good-looking 1310 01:12:52,433 --> 01:12:54,458 and, uh, I have a rapist wit. 1311 01:12:54,502 --> 01:12:56,561 No, I don't know. I don't think I could... no. 1312 01:12:56,604 --> 01:12:59,368 - Come on, please. - No, I'm not... 1313 01:12:59,407 --> 01:13:02,501 - Please! Please! - Okay okay okay. Stop. 1314 01:13:02,543 --> 01:13:04,443 What are you gonna do? 1315 01:13:04,479 --> 01:13:06,743 I'm going to hang by the bar, 1316 01:13:06,781 --> 01:13:10,148 - put out the vibe. - Okay. 1317 01:13:20,828 --> 01:13:23,228 Nice set of hooters you got there. 1318 01:13:25,533 --> 01:13:28,798 - I beg your pardon? - The owls, they're beautiful. 1319 01:13:30,171 --> 01:13:32,503 Oh. 1320 01:13:32,540 --> 01:13:34,508 Yeah. 1321 01:13:34,542 --> 01:13:36,476 Are you a bird lover? 1322 01:13:36,511 --> 01:13:39,002 Me? Oh, no. Well, I used to have a parakeet... 1323 01:13:39,046 --> 01:13:41,947 - Ah. ...but now my main area of expertise 1324 01:13:41,983 --> 01:13:44,474 is, uh, canines... 1325 01:13:44,519 --> 01:13:46,646 "dogs" to the layperson. 1326 01:13:47,655 --> 01:13:49,850 - Thanks. - Mm-hmm. 1327 01:13:50,858 --> 01:13:53,827 - I love dogs too. - Oh. 1328 01:13:53,861 --> 01:13:56,125 - So how are you involved with them? - Oh, you know, 1329 01:13:56,164 --> 01:13:59,133 I've trained them, bathed them, clipped them. 1330 01:13:59,167 --> 01:14:00,930 - I've even bred them. - Oh, really? 1331 01:14:00,968 --> 01:14:02,936 - Any unusual breeding? - No. 1332 01:14:02,970 --> 01:14:05,029 Mostly just doggy-style. 1333 01:14:05,072 --> 01:14:08,405 One time, we successfully mated 1334 01:14:08,443 --> 01:14:10,809 a bulldog with a shih-tzu. 1335 01:14:10,845 --> 01:14:13,746 Really? That's weird. 1336 01:14:13,781 --> 01:14:16,409 Yeah. We... we called it a bullshit. 1337 01:14:16,451 --> 01:14:18,180 (laughing hysterically) 1338 01:14:27,562 --> 01:14:29,860 Oh, I'm... anyway, the real reason 1339 01:14:29,897 --> 01:14:32,058 I came over here was to... 1340 01:14:32,099 --> 01:14:35,034 I've got to introduce you to a buddy of mine. 1341 01:14:35,069 --> 01:14:38,527 - I don't believe I've met your friend. - Oh. 1342 01:14:38,573 --> 01:14:41,064 Well, actually, we haven't been properly introduced. 1343 01:14:41,108 --> 01:14:43,872 - My name is Mary Swanson. - Hi, Harry Dunne. 1344 01:14:43,911 --> 01:14:46,641 Hi. Nice to meet you. This is my stepmother Helen. 1345 01:14:46,681 --> 01:14:48,945 Hi. Harry Dunne. Pleasure to meet you both. 1346 01:14:48,983 --> 01:14:51,178 Mm-hmm. Well, I saw you come in. 1347 01:14:51,219 --> 01:14:53,517 I was hoping I'd get a chance to meet you. 1348 01:14:53,554 --> 01:14:57,752 - You were? Really? - Yes! That tuxedo, it's fabulous! 1349 01:14:57,792 --> 01:15:00,590 Really. I love a man with a sense of humor, 1350 01:15:00,628 --> 01:15:03,495 and so does Mary. It's hysterical! 1351 01:15:03,531 --> 01:15:05,089 - Really? - Oh, yes. 1352 01:15:05,132 --> 01:15:08,124 Oh. Anyway, um, about my friend... 1353 01:15:08,169 --> 01:15:11,502 What are you doing tomorrow? I believe that Mary 1354 01:15:11,539 --> 01:15:13,200 is looking for someone to hit the slopes with. 1355 01:15:13,241 --> 01:15:14,970 She... what? Huh? 1356 01:15:15,009 --> 01:15:17,944 Helen, you're embarrassing me. 1357 01:15:17,979 --> 01:15:19,947 Well, you are. I mean, after all, 1358 01:15:19,981 --> 01:15:22,108 the snow's going to be gone in a couple of weeks. 1359 01:15:22,149 --> 01:15:24,014 And, well, this may be your last chance. 1360 01:15:24,051 --> 01:15:26,144 Poor thing, she never gets a chance to get out. 1361 01:15:26,187 --> 01:15:28,849 Well, what do you say, Mr. Dunne? Are you available? 1362 01:15:28,890 --> 01:15:31,188 Well, I don't know. See, my friend... 1363 01:15:31,225 --> 01:15:33,090 Oh, forget your friend for one day. 1364 01:15:33,127 --> 01:15:36,221 I think you kids'll have a wonderful time. What do you say? 1365 01:15:36,264 --> 01:15:38,494 Well, you know, I don't know, you know. 1366 01:15:38,533 --> 01:15:40,967 You know, the thing... part of... sure. 1367 01:15:41,002 --> 01:15:44,130 What time? Ahem... 1368 01:15:47,542 --> 01:15:50,033 How come you didn't bring her over? 1369 01:15:50,077 --> 01:15:52,045 Relax. You're golden. 1370 01:15:52,079 --> 01:15:54,513 - I got you a date with her tomorrow. - Oh. 1371 01:15:56,117 --> 01:15:58,551 - (stammers) What... I... this... - Yeah. 1372 01:15:58,586 --> 01:16:00,850 - I love you, man. - Okay okay. 1373 01:16:00,888 --> 01:16:02,719 - You're kissing me. - I love you. 1374 01:16:02,757 --> 01:16:05,225 - I love you! - You're kissing me. Lloyd! 1375 01:16:07,628 --> 01:16:10,256 This calls for a little of the bubbly! 1376 01:16:10,298 --> 01:16:12,528 - You're going to be my best man, Harr. - Oh, good. 1377 01:16:12,567 --> 01:16:14,125 - I promise. - Thank you. 1378 01:16:14,168 --> 01:16:16,136 You have just earned yourself a seat 1379 01:16:16,170 --> 01:16:20,129 at the head table, pal. And we already got the tuxes. 1380 01:16:21,342 --> 01:16:23,276 - (loud thud) - (owl squawks) 1381 01:16:26,981 --> 01:16:29,313 - Woman: Gracious sakes! - (crowd murmuring) 1382 01:16:29,350 --> 01:16:33,013 - Man: Good grief! - Boy, this party really died. 1383 01:16:40,124 --> 01:16:42,615 Hey, maybe it was a coincidence. 1384 01:16:42,659 --> 01:16:45,184 (mimics) Hey, maybe it was a coincidence. 1385 01:16:45,229 --> 01:16:48,687 It was a message, Shay, pure and simple. 1386 01:16:48,732 --> 01:16:50,927 I mean, we killed their bird. 1387 01:16:50,968 --> 01:16:53,994 Now they killed one of ours. 1388 01:16:55,939 --> 01:16:57,998 How could anybody whack a bird with a cork? 1389 01:16:58,041 --> 01:17:00,339 These guys aren't just anybody. 1390 01:17:00,377 --> 01:17:03,437 They're good. 1391 01:17:09,319 --> 01:17:11,651 Mary Christmas. 1392 01:17:11,688 --> 01:17:14,452 Mrs. Mary Christmas. 1393 01:17:16,026 --> 01:17:19,427 - Kinda catchy, huh, Harr? - Yeah yeah, that sounds nice. 1394 01:17:19,463 --> 01:17:22,864 But, Lloyd, don't you think you might be jumping the gun a little bit? 1395 01:17:22,900 --> 01:17:24,834 I mean, you know, who knows? 1396 01:17:24,868 --> 01:17:26,733 You know, maybe, once you get to know her 1397 01:17:26,770 --> 01:17:29,102 you'll find out that she's not your type. 1398 01:17:31,175 --> 01:17:32,938 Hey! 1399 01:17:32,976 --> 01:17:36,139 Don't you ever say that again! 1400 01:17:37,214 --> 01:17:39,205 She is the love of my life! 1401 01:17:39,249 --> 01:17:41,683 The blood in my veins! 1402 01:17:41,718 --> 01:17:43,413 We belong together... 1403 01:17:43,453 --> 01:17:45,751 till the mountains fall into the sea, 1404 01:17:45,789 --> 01:17:47,689 till the heavens collide! 1405 01:17:47,724 --> 01:17:50,318 Or until I get sick of her and need to move on. 1406 01:17:50,360 --> 01:17:53,796 - You hear me?! - Okay okay okay okay. Just calm down. 1407 01:17:53,831 --> 01:17:55,696 Just calm down. 1408 01:17:55,732 --> 01:17:58,223 (panting) Okay. 1409 01:17:58,268 --> 01:18:01,328 Now... 1410 01:18:01,371 --> 01:18:03,839 let me get this straight. 1411 01:18:03,874 --> 01:18:07,071 Lobby bar in the lobby. 1412 01:18:07,110 --> 01:18:08,873 Yeah, and that's what she said. 1413 01:18:08,912 --> 01:18:11,142 She'll meet you there at 10:00 sharp. 1414 01:18:12,216 --> 01:18:14,343 - Okay. - Okay. 1415 01:18:16,920 --> 01:18:19,150 Where're you going in that get-up? 1416 01:18:20,824 --> 01:18:22,815 Oh. I... you know, I just thought, you know, 1417 01:18:22,860 --> 01:18:24,953 when you'd be off making your love connection 1418 01:18:24,995 --> 01:18:27,293 I'd be out trying my luck on the slopes. 1419 01:18:27,331 --> 01:18:29,299 You mean you're gonna go out in public 1420 01:18:29,333 --> 01:18:31,324 dressed in tights? 1421 01:18:31,368 --> 01:18:33,302 Oh no, these aren't tights, Lloyd. 1422 01:18:33,337 --> 01:18:35,805 These are fashionable Euro-trash ski trousers. 1423 01:18:35,839 --> 01:18:38,137 Pretty revealing. 1424 01:18:39,142 --> 01:18:40,439 Really? 1425 01:18:40,477 --> 01:18:42,502 Yeah, but it's just a tiny lump. 1426 01:18:42,546 --> 01:18:44,946 No one'll notice. 1427 01:18:44,982 --> 01:18:47,542 You're right. I can't go out dressed like this. 1428 01:18:49,786 --> 01:18:51,382 ("New Age Girl" playing) 1429 01:18:51,417 --> 01:18:52,979 ("New Age Girl" playing) 1430 01:18:53,023 --> 01:18:56,424 # Rah! # 1431 01:18:56,460 --> 01:19:00,123 - # I've got a New Age girl # - # Tell us what she's like # 1432 01:19:00,163 --> 01:19:03,792 - # Environmentalist girl # - # Does she ride a bike? # 1433 01:19:03,834 --> 01:19:05,893 - # She has a crystal necklace... # - Hey! 1434 01:19:05,936 --> 01:19:07,460 - Coming! - # She spend a lot of cash? # 1435 01:19:07,504 --> 01:19:09,495 # Though her vibes are rather reckless # 1436 01:19:09,539 --> 01:19:12,303 - # Heading for the crash... # - Hey! 1437 01:19:12,342 --> 01:19:15,106 Man: Nice going, buddy! 1438 01:19:15,145 --> 01:19:17,875 # ... and she wonders about knowing, where did we begin? # 1439 01:19:17,915 --> 01:19:20,509 # Mary Moon # 1440 01:19:20,550 --> 01:19:24,543 - # She's a vegetarian # - # Mary Moon, Mary Moon, Mary Moon # 1441 01:19:24,588 --> 01:19:29,389 # Mary Moon will help with all the septuagenarians... # 1442 01:19:29,426 --> 01:19:32,088 - # Mary Moon, Mary Moon, Mary Moon. - Ma'am. 1443 01:19:32,129 --> 01:19:36,156 # Mary Moon, she's an intellectual... # 1444 01:19:36,199 --> 01:19:38,167 Beautiful outfit, sir. 1445 01:19:38,201 --> 01:19:40,260 There you go. 1446 01:19:40,304 --> 01:19:43,865 # Mary Moon, despite that fact, remains quite sexual # 1447 01:19:43,907 --> 01:19:46,398 # Mary Moon, Mary Moon, Mary Moon. # 1448 01:19:51,014 --> 01:19:53,812 Hey. How you doin'? 1449 01:19:53,850 --> 01:19:55,511 You're a little early. 1450 01:19:55,552 --> 01:19:58,521 We don't open for about 45 minutes. 1451 01:19:58,555 --> 01:20:00,955 I'm meeting someone here. 1452 01:20:00,991 --> 01:20:05,223 - Mind if I wait at the bar? - No. Come on in. 1453 01:20:07,631 --> 01:20:10,259 It's a beautiful day, huh, Harry? 1454 01:20:10,300 --> 01:20:14,100 Yes yes, I've had a wonderful time so far. Thank you. 1455 01:20:14,137 --> 01:20:17,072 God, it feels so good to get up here. 1456 01:20:17,107 --> 01:20:20,543 I haven't been outside that much in the last couple weeks. 1457 01:20:20,577 --> 01:20:23,011 Oh, yeah? Why not? 1458 01:20:23,046 --> 01:20:26,914 Um, there's been some family problems, 1459 01:20:26,950 --> 01:20:29,919 but I don't want to bore you with those. 1460 01:20:29,953 --> 01:20:31,944 Thanks. 1461 01:20:31,989 --> 01:20:34,423 Oh, look. Frost. 1462 01:20:37,661 --> 01:20:41,290 - Harry? - (grunting) 1463 01:20:43,333 --> 01:20:45,164 - Are you okay? - (muffled) Oh, yeah, 1464 01:20:45,202 --> 01:20:48,399 I do this all the time. 1465 01:20:51,975 --> 01:20:54,273 Let's go to the top this time. 1466 01:21:01,218 --> 01:21:05,177 - Hi, there. - Ugh... 1467 01:21:05,222 --> 01:21:06,951 Say, kids, 1468 01:21:06,990 --> 01:21:08,890 you wouldn't happen to have 1469 01:21:08,925 --> 01:21:11,018 a cup of warm water, would you? 1470 01:21:11,061 --> 01:21:13,689 (slurps) Yuck. 1471 01:21:17,434 --> 01:21:19,402 Excuse me. 1472 01:21:19,436 --> 01:21:21,631 Is it 10:00 A.M. Yet? 1473 01:21:22,639 --> 01:21:24,800 It's 1:00. 1474 01:21:27,477 --> 01:21:31,607 That's what I have too. Thought maybe it was fast. 1475 01:21:34,618 --> 01:21:37,314 She's running late, huh? 1476 01:21:37,354 --> 01:21:40,619 Just a couple hours. You know girls. 1477 01:21:40,657 --> 01:21:43,353 When they're excited about something, 1478 01:21:43,393 --> 01:21:45,725 everything has to be perfect. 1479 01:21:53,270 --> 01:21:55,329 This one's on me. 1480 01:21:57,474 --> 01:21:59,465 Yippee. 1481 01:21:59,509 --> 01:22:01,443 Chablis, please. 1482 01:22:02,446 --> 01:22:04,641 Hello. 1483 01:22:06,349 --> 01:22:08,374 (belching) 1484 01:22:10,620 --> 01:22:12,713 Bad day, huh? 1485 01:22:13,723 --> 01:22:16,123 Me too. 1486 01:22:16,159 --> 01:22:18,024 'Course everything's been bad 1487 01:22:18,061 --> 01:22:20,291 since I broke up with my boyfriend. 1488 01:22:33,376 --> 01:22:35,810 (whispers) Oh my God. 1489 01:22:39,049 --> 01:22:41,279 My God! You poor guy. Does it hurt? 1490 01:22:41,318 --> 01:22:44,219 I'm fine. I saved a seat for you. 1491 01:22:44,254 --> 01:22:46,017 (taps) 1492 01:22:46,056 --> 01:22:47,751 Oh no, listen. This is silly. Let me help you. 1493 01:22:47,791 --> 01:22:49,691 No no no no no. 1494 01:22:49,726 --> 01:22:52,058 Yes. It'll only hurt for a moment, like a Band-Aid. 1495 01:22:52,095 --> 01:22:54,529 - Come on, ready? - No no no no. No. 1496 01:22:54,564 --> 01:22:56,395 Come on. Go. 1497 01:22:56,433 --> 01:22:58,298 (grunting) 1498 01:22:58,335 --> 01:23:00,326 (crackling) 1499 01:23:23,260 --> 01:23:26,593 # Well, if you want, I'll be by your side # 1500 01:23:26,630 --> 01:23:30,691 # And if you don't, maybe suicide # 1501 01:23:30,734 --> 01:23:34,568 # It's my love that'd kill me, dear # 1502 01:23:34,604 --> 01:23:37,767 # If you won't hold me and have me near # 1503 01:23:37,807 --> 01:23:42,176 # 'Cause I'll be good to you in every way # 1504 01:23:42,212 --> 01:23:45,375 # I'll give you loving, baby, every day # 1505 01:23:45,415 --> 01:23:48,816 # A loving that's good enough, a loving that's all right # 1506 01:23:48,852 --> 01:23:52,083 # I'll love you like an oven on the coldest night # 1507 01:23:52,122 --> 01:23:54,022 # Whoo! # 1508 01:23:57,227 --> 01:23:58,888 (loud thud) 1509 01:24:07,270 --> 01:24:12,003 # 'Cause if you don't love me, I'll kill myself # 1510 01:24:14,844 --> 01:24:18,746 # If you don't love me, I'll kill myself # 1511 01:24:21,518 --> 01:24:25,545 # If you don't love me, I'll kill myself # 1512 01:24:25,589 --> 01:24:27,784 (screams) 1513 01:24:27,824 --> 01:24:33,126 # If you don't love me, I'll kill myself # 1514 01:24:34,130 --> 01:24:36,360 Come on, come on. 1515 01:24:36,399 --> 01:24:38,629 # If you don't love me. # 1516 01:24:38,668 --> 01:24:43,128 - (chuckles) - Pfft. 1517 01:24:43,173 --> 01:24:45,539 What am... 1518 01:24:45,575 --> 01:24:47,770 (laughing) 1519 01:24:48,912 --> 01:24:50,880 I said to myself, "Run, Beth. 1520 01:24:50,914 --> 01:24:53,678 Run for your life before this man kills you both." 1521 01:24:53,717 --> 01:24:56,379 Then do you know what the klutz did? 1522 01:24:56,419 --> 01:24:59,217 No, and I don't care! 1523 01:24:59,256 --> 01:25:02,123 I'm going to tell you, He came home one night dead drunk 1524 01:25:02,158 --> 01:25:04,217 and decided he wanted to fix the sink. 1525 01:25:04,261 --> 01:25:05,751 Couldn't believe him. 1526 01:25:05,795 --> 01:25:08,229 Anyway, enough about me. Let's talk about you. 1527 01:25:08,265 --> 01:25:10,495 - How come you're here? - Bartender! 1528 01:25:10,533 --> 01:25:12,728 Yeah? 1529 01:25:12,769 --> 01:25:16,637 You wouldn't happen to know a Mary Swanson, would you? 1530 01:25:16,673 --> 01:25:19,506 Mary Swanson? Yeah. 1531 01:25:19,542 --> 01:25:22,306 She comes in here all the time. 1532 01:25:22,345 --> 01:25:24,176 What's that supposed to mean? 1533 01:25:24,214 --> 01:25:25,647 She has dinner. 1534 01:25:25,682 --> 01:25:29,778 Oh. I'm sorry. 1535 01:25:32,188 --> 01:25:33,678 Uh... 1536 01:25:33,723 --> 01:25:37,591 you know where she lives? 1537 01:25:37,627 --> 01:25:41,654 Yeah, her family has the big place up on Alpine Drive. 1538 01:25:41,698 --> 01:25:44,826 Alpine Drive? Big place? 1539 01:25:52,575 --> 01:25:54,907 No way! 1540 01:25:56,513 --> 01:25:58,572 That's great! 1541 01:25:58,615 --> 01:26:00,981 We landed on the moon! 1542 01:26:07,691 --> 01:26:09,682 I've gotta tell you, 1543 01:26:09,726 --> 01:26:12,354 today was just what I needed. Thanks a lot, Harry. 1544 01:26:12,395 --> 01:26:15,193 (slurred) Blell, blit blas... 1545 01:26:15,231 --> 01:26:17,722 it was my pleasure, Mary. 1546 01:26:17,767 --> 01:26:20,702 So you'll pick me up tonight at 7:45? 1547 01:26:20,737 --> 01:26:22,568 Well, no, I've got a few things 1548 01:26:22,605 --> 01:26:24,232 to take care of first. 1549 01:26:24,274 --> 01:26:25,935 Why don't we make it quarter to 8:00? 1550 01:26:25,975 --> 01:26:30,241 (laughs) Stop it! 1551 01:26:30,280 --> 01:26:32,874 Okay 7:45. 1552 01:26:34,351 --> 01:26:37,184 (kisses) Bye. 1553 01:27:21,564 --> 01:27:23,555 Doesn't make any sense, Lloyd. 1554 01:27:23,600 --> 01:27:25,363 She told me 10:00 sharp! 1555 01:27:25,402 --> 01:27:27,734 Are you sure you went to the right bar? 1556 01:27:27,771 --> 01:27:31,639 Oh, yeah. Yep. I'm pretty sure. 1557 01:27:31,674 --> 01:27:34,837 Lobby bar. Right in the lobby. 1558 01:27:34,878 --> 01:27:38,006 Ahh... well... 1559 01:27:38,047 --> 01:27:40,845 maybe she just had a change of heart. 1560 01:27:40,884 --> 01:27:44,320 Oh, that pisses me off! That pisses me right off! 1561 01:27:44,354 --> 01:27:46,345 I hate when women do that, you know? 1562 01:27:46,389 --> 01:27:48,050 She wanted to see you again! 1563 01:27:48,091 --> 01:27:49,956 She told me that! And now no? 1564 01:27:49,993 --> 01:27:52,894 Now... wait a minute! Wait! 1565 01:27:52,929 --> 01:27:55,864 She must have meant 10:00 at night. 1566 01:27:55,899 --> 01:27:58,424 Do you think? 1567 01:27:58,468 --> 01:28:02,461 Why would she have you meet her at a bar at 10:00 in the morning? 1568 01:28:02,505 --> 01:28:04,666 I just figured she was a raging alcoholic. 1569 01:28:04,707 --> 01:28:07,699 (both laughing) 1570 01:28:10,413 --> 01:28:12,677 - Oh, that's th... - And all this time, 1571 01:28:12,715 --> 01:28:16,617 I've been going through such pain and personal anguish. 1572 01:28:16,653 --> 01:28:19,713 Such hell! For nothing! 1573 01:28:19,756 --> 01:28:21,553 Oh, God. That's funny. 1574 01:28:21,591 --> 01:28:23,923 Oh, that's good stuff. Oh, boy. 1575 01:28:23,960 --> 01:28:26,690 Well, listen, looks like you got your night planned, 1576 01:28:26,729 --> 01:28:29,027 so I'm just going to head out and catch a flick. 1577 01:28:29,065 --> 01:28:30,726 Okay. 1578 01:28:32,735 --> 01:28:35,101 10:00 in the morning. 1579 01:28:51,821 --> 01:28:54,449 Hey, Harry, old buddy, old pal! 1580 01:28:54,491 --> 01:28:56,118 Yeah? 1581 01:28:56,159 --> 01:28:59,617 Will you join me in a good-luck toast before you head out? 1582 01:28:59,662 --> 01:29:03,063 Oh, sure thing. Whatever you think will help your chances. 1583 01:29:03,099 --> 01:29:05,465 Yes, sirree. 1584 01:29:05,502 --> 01:29:07,766 You know why I like you, Harry? 1585 01:29:07,804 --> 01:29:10,034 Because you're a regular guy. 1586 01:29:11,474 --> 01:29:14,875 Yep, that's why I want you to stay regular. 1587 01:29:16,012 --> 01:29:20,813 1/2 teaspoon for fast, effective relief. 1588 01:29:24,554 --> 01:29:28,115 (whistling) 1589 01:29:31,961 --> 01:29:34,122 (laughing) 1590 01:29:36,165 --> 01:29:38,565 Mmm! 1591 01:29:38,601 --> 01:29:41,468 ("Auld Lang Syne" playing) 1592 01:29:41,504 --> 01:29:45,600 To my friend Harry... the matchmaker. 1593 01:29:45,642 --> 01:29:49,100 Oh, get out of here. I'm... I've... 1594 01:29:51,915 --> 01:29:53,849 Mmm. 1595 01:29:53,883 --> 01:29:56,716 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 1596 01:29:56,753 --> 01:29:59,221 Mmm. 1597 01:30:08,998 --> 01:30:12,161 (stomach rumbles) 1598 01:30:13,570 --> 01:30:15,470 (doorbell rings) 1599 01:30:15,505 --> 01:30:18,269 Mary: Hi, the door's open. Come on upstairs. 1600 01:30:23,546 --> 01:30:24,979 - Hi. - Hi. 1601 01:30:25,014 --> 01:30:26,641 Hi, make yourself at home, okay? 1602 01:30:26,683 --> 01:30:28,150 I'm almost ready. One minute? 1603 01:30:28,184 --> 01:30:30,709 - Okay, sounds good. - Okay. 1604 01:30:41,030 --> 01:30:43,863 (stomach violently gurgling) 1605 01:31:05,622 --> 01:31:08,819 (loud sputtering) 1606 01:31:09,826 --> 01:31:12,920 (trills) 1607 01:31:25,908 --> 01:31:28,570 (sputtering continues) 1608 01:31:28,611 --> 01:31:30,579 (sighs) 1609 01:31:30,613 --> 01:31:32,945 (chuckles) 1610 01:31:37,553 --> 01:31:40,454 (panting) 1611 01:31:52,669 --> 01:31:54,136 (knocks) 1612 01:31:54,170 --> 01:31:56,934 Mary: Harry, are you in there? 1613 01:31:56,973 --> 01:31:58,964 Be right out! 1614 01:31:59,008 --> 01:32:02,774 I hope you're not using the toilet. It's broken. 1615 01:32:02,812 --> 01:32:05,872 (ominous music plays) 1616 01:32:05,915 --> 01:32:09,612 - Huh? - The toilet doesn't flush. 1617 01:32:09,652 --> 01:32:11,847 No, I was just shaving. 1618 01:32:11,888 --> 01:32:14,083 Shaving? 1619 01:32:14,123 --> 01:32:16,648 Yeah, I was running a little late. 1620 01:32:16,693 --> 01:32:19,161 I thought this would save some time. 1621 01:32:21,164 --> 01:32:25,396 Okay well, I'll be in the kitchen whenever you're ready. 1622 01:32:27,970 --> 01:32:30,632 Oh, Jeez! 1623 01:32:30,673 --> 01:32:32,537 - (laughing maniacally) - (whimsical music playing) 1624 01:32:32,572 --> 01:32:34,401 - (laughing maniacally) - (whimsical music playing) 1625 01:32:45,888 --> 01:32:47,719 Tomorrow on "A Current Affair," 1626 01:32:47,757 --> 01:32:50,317 inside the home of the Menendez brothers' attorney. 1627 01:32:50,359 --> 01:32:52,589 And next, we'll be back in a minute 1628 01:32:52,628 --> 01:32:57,031 with the heartbreaking story of the blind Rhode Island boy 1629 01:32:57,066 --> 01:33:00,001 who was duped into buying a dead parakeet. 1630 01:33:00,036 --> 01:33:03,199 I just thought he was real quiet. 1631 01:33:07,944 --> 01:33:09,673 Who are these sick people? 1632 01:33:09,712 --> 01:33:11,543 (doorbell rings) 1633 01:33:14,784 --> 01:33:16,843 - Hi! - Hi. 1634 01:33:16,886 --> 01:33:18,945 Yes? 1635 01:33:18,988 --> 01:33:20,683 Remember me? 1636 01:33:21,691 --> 01:33:24,922 Uh... not really. 1637 01:33:24,961 --> 01:33:28,920 Providen... Providence. 1638 01:33:28,965 --> 01:33:30,990 I drove you to the airport last week. 1639 01:33:31,033 --> 01:33:32,898 Oh my God! 1640 01:33:32,935 --> 01:33:35,665 Uh... Lloyd, right? 1641 01:33:35,705 --> 01:33:39,266 You remembered my name. 1642 01:33:39,308 --> 01:33:41,708 What are you doing in Aspen? 1643 01:33:41,744 --> 01:33:43,336 I brought you your briefcase. 1644 01:33:43,379 --> 01:33:47,110 You left it at the airport, you big goof! 1645 01:33:47,150 --> 01:33:49,983 - You have my briefcase? - Yeah. 1646 01:33:50,019 --> 01:33:52,146 Hey, I have it at my hotel room. 1647 01:33:52,188 --> 01:33:54,850 You want to jump on the bike with me? We can go get it 1648 01:33:54,891 --> 01:33:58,349 unless... unless you're busy. 1649 01:33:58,394 --> 01:34:00,328 Oh, no no no! No no! 1650 01:34:00,363 --> 01:34:02,228 - I don't wanna... - You just wait right here. 1651 01:34:02,265 --> 01:34:03,960 - Okay. - Okay? 1652 01:34:08,805 --> 01:34:11,296 Come on, flush, you bastard! 1653 01:34:14,911 --> 01:34:17,243 Mary: Harry, what are you doing in there? 1654 01:34:17,280 --> 01:34:22,650 - I'm just... I'm cleaning my teeth! - (clattering) 1655 01:34:35,965 --> 01:34:37,626 I'm cleaning my teeth. 1656 01:34:39,101 --> 01:34:41,262 I'm gargling. 1657 01:34:41,304 --> 01:34:43,966 Just give me a minute, Mary. I'll be right with you. 1658 01:34:44,006 --> 01:34:46,304 Harry, I'm sorry, but something important's come up, 1659 01:34:46,342 --> 01:34:48,242 and I've got to run out. 1660 01:34:48,277 --> 01:34:51,110 It's-it's sort of an emergency. I'll explain later. 1661 01:34:51,147 --> 01:34:54,776 - But, Mary... - I'm sorry. I've really got to go. 1662 01:34:54,817 --> 01:34:57,149 I promise we'll do this again sometime. 1663 01:35:08,431 --> 01:35:10,763 Race you to the top. 1664 01:35:12,435 --> 01:35:15,427 - Come here. - Agh! 1665 01:35:18,241 --> 01:35:21,768 Yeah! Ha ha! 1666 01:35:22,945 --> 01:35:24,469 I won! 1667 01:35:24,513 --> 01:35:27,277 Look familiar? 1668 01:35:27,316 --> 01:35:29,216 I don't believe it. You really have it. 1669 01:35:29,252 --> 01:35:31,049 Of course, I have it. 1670 01:35:31,087 --> 01:35:33,351 When Lloyd Christmas drives a woman to the airport, 1671 01:35:33,389 --> 01:35:35,152 he makes sure she gets all her luggage. 1672 01:35:35,191 --> 01:35:38,217 - That's my whole philosophy. - This is incredible. 1673 01:35:38,261 --> 01:35:41,025 You mean to say you drove 2,000 miles 1674 01:35:41,063 --> 01:35:43,497 just for me? 1675 01:35:43,532 --> 01:35:48,595 Uh... I didn't really have a lot to do. 1676 01:35:50,006 --> 01:35:51,871 And I know how frustrating it can be 1677 01:35:51,908 --> 01:35:54,001 to lose a bag. 1678 01:35:54,043 --> 01:35:57,206 That is so sweet, Lloyd. 1679 01:35:57,246 --> 01:35:59,510 (kisses) 1680 01:35:59,548 --> 01:36:03,075 (romantic pop music playing) 1681 01:36:11,594 --> 01:36:14,893 Look, Mary, I know this may seem a little sudden, 1682 01:36:14,931 --> 01:36:17,024 but I've given it a lot of thought. 1683 01:36:17,066 --> 01:36:20,194 You're the woman I've been waiting for my whole life, 1684 01:36:20,236 --> 01:36:21,999 and I'm not ashamed to admit it. 1685 01:36:22,038 --> 01:36:26,168 Please... Let me finish. 1686 01:36:26,208 --> 01:36:29,507 I'm crazy about you. 1687 01:36:29,545 --> 01:36:32,412 I've never felt this way about anybody. 1688 01:36:32,448 --> 01:36:35,178 Listen to me. 1689 01:36:35,217 --> 01:36:38,209 I feel like a schoolboy again, 1690 01:36:38,254 --> 01:36:41,018 a schoolboy who desperately wants 1691 01:36:41,057 --> 01:36:43,787 to make sweet sweet love to you. 1692 01:36:53,202 --> 01:36:56,831 Oh, I thought I heard you talking to someone. 1693 01:36:59,041 --> 01:37:02,841 Mary, I- I... 1694 01:37:07,950 --> 01:37:11,351 I desperately want to make love to a schoolboy. 1695 01:37:12,588 --> 01:37:15,421 - Maybe I should be going. - No no... 1696 01:37:15,458 --> 01:37:17,323 (stutters) 1697 01:37:17,360 --> 01:37:20,329 No, I... that's not what I meant. 1698 01:37:23,332 --> 01:37:28,235 Um... what I meant was, um... 1699 01:37:30,373 --> 01:37:32,273 God. 1700 01:37:32,308 --> 01:37:35,300 I-I like you, Mary. 1701 01:37:37,680 --> 01:37:41,309 I like you a lot. 1702 01:37:42,618 --> 01:37:47,248 I want to ask you a question straight out, flat out, 1703 01:37:47,289 --> 01:37:49,621 and I want you to give me an honest answer. 1704 01:37:49,658 --> 01:37:52,092 What do you think the chances are 1705 01:37:52,128 --> 01:37:56,189 of a guy like you and a girl like me... 1706 01:37:57,633 --> 01:37:59,931 ending up together? 1707 01:37:59,969 --> 01:38:02,301 Well, Lloyd, that's difficult to say. 1708 01:38:02,338 --> 01:38:05,034 We really don't... 1709 01:38:05,107 --> 01:38:07,667 Hit me with it! Just give it to me straight! 1710 01:38:07,710 --> 01:38:09,940 I came a long way just to see you, Mary. 1711 01:38:09,979 --> 01:38:12,504 Just... the least you can do is level with me. 1712 01:38:12,548 --> 01:38:14,948 What are my chances? 1713 01:38:14,984 --> 01:38:17,509 Not good. 1714 01:38:21,490 --> 01:38:25,984 You mean not good, like one out of 100? 1715 01:38:26,028 --> 01:38:30,397 I'd say more like one out of a million. 1716 01:38:35,704 --> 01:38:39,572 So you're telling me there's a chance! 1717 01:38:41,710 --> 01:38:43,803 Yeah! 1718 01:38:45,414 --> 01:38:47,382 I read you. 1719 01:38:47,416 --> 01:38:49,441 (knocks) 1720 01:38:54,423 --> 01:38:57,392 Hi. We have plenty of towels. Thanks. 1721 01:38:57,426 --> 01:39:00,259 Nicholas! What are you doing here? 1722 01:39:00,296 --> 01:39:01,991 I've been looking for you, Mary. 1723 01:39:02,031 --> 01:39:04,022 I have some news about your husband. 1724 01:39:05,267 --> 01:39:08,634 Husband?! Wait a minute! 1725 01:39:10,239 --> 01:39:14,005 What was all that one-in-a-million talk? 1726 01:39:14,043 --> 01:39:16,841 Aren't you going to invite me in? 1727 01:39:21,817 --> 01:39:25,514 Beth: Hey, Harry, you never called! 1728 01:39:25,554 --> 01:39:27,488 What are you doing here? 1729 01:39:31,494 --> 01:39:34,588 Excuse me, gunman, who are you? 1730 01:39:34,630 --> 01:39:36,655 Don't play dumb with me, asshole! 1731 01:39:36,699 --> 01:39:39,566 I'm the rightful owner of that briefcase you've been carrying around! 1732 01:39:39,602 --> 01:39:41,729 Oh. Well, then... 1733 01:39:41,770 --> 01:39:45,797 Nicholas, my family trusted you. 1734 01:39:45,841 --> 01:39:48,036 Shut up! 1735 01:39:48,077 --> 01:39:52,070 Listen, Mr. Samsonite, about the briefcase... 1736 01:39:52,114 --> 01:39:54,139 my friend Harry and I have every intention 1737 01:39:54,183 --> 01:39:56,743 - of fully reimbursing you. - What? 1738 01:39:56,785 --> 01:40:00,312 You open it up. Open it up! 1739 01:40:00,356 --> 01:40:03,189 Go ahead, open it up. Do what he says. 1740 01:40:03,225 --> 01:40:04,988 Hurry. 1741 01:40:09,865 --> 01:40:12,356 What is this? What is this? 1742 01:40:12,401 --> 01:40:14,096 Where's all the money? 1743 01:40:14,136 --> 01:40:17,071 That's as good as money, sir. 1744 01:40:17,106 --> 01:40:19,597 Those are IOUs. Go ahead and add it up. 1745 01:40:19,642 --> 01:40:21,576 Every cent's accounted for. 1746 01:40:21,610 --> 01:40:24,545 Look. See this? 1747 01:40:24,580 --> 01:40:26,844 That's a car. 275 thou. 1748 01:40:26,882 --> 01:40:29,043 Might want to hang on to that one. 1749 01:40:32,855 --> 01:40:35,881 You're a dead man. You're a dead man! 1750 01:40:40,863 --> 01:40:43,798 Lloyd, I'm home! 1751 01:40:43,832 --> 01:40:47,131 Look, we've got to have a serious talk. 1752 01:40:47,169 --> 01:40:48,693 I got a confession to make. 1753 01:40:48,737 --> 01:40:50,568 Oh, good. You found her. 1754 01:40:50,606 --> 01:40:52,164 I'll leave you two alone. 1755 01:40:52,208 --> 01:40:54,403 No. Stay. 1756 01:40:55,411 --> 01:40:57,379 Ugh! 1757 01:41:00,849 --> 01:41:03,841 Yes, I'd like a one-way ticket to Amsterdam 1758 01:41:03,886 --> 01:41:06,582 departing as soon as possible, please. 1759 01:41:06,622 --> 01:41:09,216 How do you guys know each other? 1760 01:41:09,258 --> 01:41:11,192 We used to be best friends. 1761 01:41:11,227 --> 01:41:13,195 Yeah, until he turned into a backstabber. 1762 01:41:13,229 --> 01:41:16,255 Me a backstabber? You got a lot of nerve. 1763 01:41:16,298 --> 01:41:18,129 You knew I was crazy about her! 1764 01:41:18,167 --> 01:41:20,465 And you knew I was crazy about Fraida Felcher, 1765 01:41:20,502 --> 01:41:23,903 - and that didn't stop you, did it? - (gasps) 1766 01:41:23,939 --> 01:41:26,237 - What do you mean? - (mimics) What do you mean? 1767 01:41:26,275 --> 01:41:28,175 Don't deny it, Lloyd. 1768 01:41:28,210 --> 01:41:31,475 Fraida told me the whole sleazy story, Mr. French Tickler. 1769 01:41:34,350 --> 01:41:36,875 Okay, what time does it... what time does that leave? 1770 01:41:36,919 --> 01:41:38,887 Thank you... wait a second. 1771 01:41:38,921 --> 01:41:40,855 Can I have a vegetarian meal? 1772 01:41:40,889 --> 01:41:43,289 I guess we both learned a little something 1773 01:41:43,325 --> 01:41:45,793 - about each other today, didn't we? - Yeah, you said it, pal. 1774 01:41:45,828 --> 01:41:47,489 Maybe we're not as good of friends as we thought we were. 1775 01:41:47,529 --> 01:41:48,461 I guess not. 1776 01:41:48,497 --> 01:41:51,364 I mean, if one beautiful girl can rip us apart like this, 1777 01:41:51,400 --> 01:41:53,391 then maybe our friendship isn't worth a damn. 1778 01:41:53,435 --> 01:41:54,868 Maybe we should call it quits right now. 1779 01:41:54,903 --> 01:41:56,871 You just tell me where to sign, bud. 1780 01:41:56,905 --> 01:41:58,896 Right on my ass after you kiss it! 1781 01:41:58,941 --> 01:42:00,533 Kiss it?! You kiss mine! 1782 01:42:00,576 --> 01:42:02,737 Both cheeks, both lips, right here! 1783 01:42:02,778 --> 01:42:06,737 - Put it right... - Shut up! 1784 01:42:08,751 --> 01:42:11,481 Now, which one of you losers wants to get it first? 1785 01:42:12,955 --> 01:42:15,515 Over here... 1786 01:42:15,557 --> 01:42:17,957 I was the one that got you into this whole mess. 1787 01:42:17,993 --> 01:42:20,291 Come on and shoot me. 1788 01:42:20,329 --> 01:42:23,355 No! Wait! Wait. No no, do me first. 1789 01:42:23,399 --> 01:42:25,492 I stole your girl, Lloyd. I deserve it. 1790 01:42:25,534 --> 01:42:26,967 - No, you don't. - Yes, I do. 1791 01:42:27,002 --> 01:42:29,197 - No, you don't... - Yes, I do! 1792 01:42:29,238 --> 01:42:31,604 Yesterday was one of the greatest days of my life. 1793 01:42:31,640 --> 01:42:35,770 Mary and I went skiing, we made a snowman, she touched my leg. 1794 01:42:35,811 --> 01:42:38,177 Okay, kill him! 1795 01:42:44,653 --> 01:42:47,053 (sobbing) Oh! Oh, no! 1796 01:42:48,524 --> 01:42:51,789 You killed my best friend, you bastard! 1797 01:42:51,827 --> 01:42:53,454 If it's any consolation, 1798 01:42:53,495 --> 01:42:55,656 you're about to be reunited. 1799 01:42:59,802 --> 01:43:01,736 (gun clicking) 1800 01:43:01,770 --> 01:43:05,672 Harry! You're alive! 1801 01:43:05,708 --> 01:43:08,404 And you're a horrible shot. 1802 01:43:08,444 --> 01:43:10,503 Lucky me. 1803 01:43:10,546 --> 01:43:13,014 Police! Open up! Nobody move! 1804 01:43:13,048 --> 01:43:16,415 Everybody freeze! Get those hands up! 1805 01:43:16,452 --> 01:43:17,942 Not you, dummy! 1806 01:43:17,986 --> 01:43:19,544 Man: Get the gun. 1807 01:43:19,588 --> 01:43:22,284 Special Officer Beth Jordan, FBI. 1808 01:43:22,324 --> 01:43:23,882 Hey! Who? But... huh? 1809 01:43:23,926 --> 01:43:25,860 Mr. Dunne, thank you very much. 1810 01:43:25,894 --> 01:43:28,863 We couldn't have done it without you. 1811 01:43:28,897 --> 01:43:30,421 We've been following you guys 1812 01:43:30,466 --> 01:43:31,797 all the way from Providence. 1813 01:43:31,834 --> 01:43:33,631 What's going on, Harry? 1814 01:43:33,669 --> 01:43:36,968 Your name is Harry, isn't it? 1815 01:43:37,005 --> 01:43:40,532 Yeah, she-she grabbed me down the lobby, explained what was up. 1816 01:43:40,576 --> 01:43:42,669 Then they slapped this bulletproof vest on me 1817 01:43:42,711 --> 01:43:44,838 and gave me a gun. 1818 01:43:46,615 --> 01:43:48,981 But what if he shot you in the face? 1819 01:43:50,052 --> 01:43:52,452 What if he shot me in the face? 1820 01:43:52,488 --> 01:43:54,786 That's a risk we were willing to take. 1821 01:43:54,823 --> 01:43:56,688 How come I didn't get a gun? 1822 01:43:56,725 --> 01:43:58,989 Did you get a gun? 1823 01:43:59,027 --> 01:44:03,657 # We can't play this game anymore # 1824 01:44:03,699 --> 01:44:08,329 # But can we still be friends? # 1825 01:44:09,972 --> 01:44:14,739 # Things just can't go on like before # 1826 01:44:14,777 --> 01:44:19,441 # But can we still be friends? # 1827 01:44:19,481 --> 01:44:24,942 # We had something to learn # 1828 01:44:24,987 --> 01:44:26,955 # Now it's time... # 1829 01:44:26,989 --> 01:44:28,889 You were right, Lloyd. 1830 01:44:28,924 --> 01:44:30,983 She was definitely worth the trip. 1831 01:44:31,026 --> 01:44:35,554 Yeah. She's something, ain't she, Harr? 1832 01:44:35,597 --> 01:44:37,462 I'm glad we were able to help her out. 1833 01:44:37,499 --> 01:44:43,369 # You know it's all gone # 1834 01:44:43,405 --> 01:44:47,341 # Let's admit we made a mistake... # 1835 01:44:47,376 --> 01:44:49,105 - Honey! - Easy easy. 1836 01:44:49,144 --> 01:44:51,510 - You're okay. - Okay, I'm just a little sore. 1837 01:44:51,547 --> 01:44:54,414 I'm sorry. Oh, sweetie. 1838 01:44:54,450 --> 01:44:56,714 Oh, baby, I missed your loving. 1839 01:44:56,752 --> 01:44:59,016 Honey, there's someone I want to introduce you to. 1840 01:44:59,054 --> 01:45:01,488 He's the kindest, gentlest man I've ever met. 1841 01:45:01,523 --> 01:45:03,354 - Will you meet him? - Sure. 1842 01:45:03,392 --> 01:45:05,758 He's got a gun! 1843 01:45:08,464 --> 01:45:11,365 Mary: Lloyd? Lloyd! 1844 01:45:11,400 --> 01:45:13,368 Huh? 1845 01:45:13,402 --> 01:45:16,496 I said this is my husband Bobby. 1846 01:45:16,538 --> 01:45:19,530 - Oh. Hi, Bobby. - Hi. 1847 01:45:19,575 --> 01:45:24,069 - I'm so happy for you. - Thank you. 1848 01:45:24,112 --> 01:45:26,945 Thank you both very much. 1849 01:45:26,982 --> 01:45:30,577 I owe you both a debt of gratitude. 1850 01:45:30,619 --> 01:45:32,382 Thank you. 1851 01:45:51,473 --> 01:45:53,941 I can't believe this, Lloyd. 1852 01:45:53,976 --> 01:45:55,876 First Mary dumps us, 1853 01:45:55,911 --> 01:45:57,845 then the cops take our nest egg. 1854 01:45:57,880 --> 01:45:59,973 - Then our hog breaks down. - Yeah! 1855 01:46:00,015 --> 01:46:03,143 When are we ever gonna catch a break? 1856 01:46:04,953 --> 01:46:07,478 # Hallelujah # 1857 01:46:07,523 --> 01:46:09,616 # Hallelujah # 1858 01:46:09,658 --> 01:46:11,956 # Hallelujah hallelujah # 1859 01:46:11,994 --> 01:46:14,258 # Hallelujah. # 1860 01:46:16,698 --> 01:46:20,634 - Hi, y'all. - (speaking foreign language) 1861 01:46:20,669 --> 01:46:22,830 Hi, guys! We're going on a national bikini tour, 1862 01:46:22,871 --> 01:46:24,600 and we're looking for two oil boys 1863 01:46:24,640 --> 01:46:27,006 who can grease us up before each competition. 1864 01:46:31,213 --> 01:46:33,738 You are in luck! 1865 01:46:33,782 --> 01:46:37,047 There's a town about three miles that way. 1866 01:46:37,085 --> 01:46:39,349 I'm sure you'll find a couple guys there. 1867 01:46:42,090 --> 01:46:44,615 Okay. Thanks. 1868 01:46:44,660 --> 01:46:46,753 Bye! 1869 01:46:53,869 --> 01:46:56,497 Do you realize what you've done? 1870 01:46:56,538 --> 01:47:00,167 - Hey! - Lloyd! 1871 01:47:00,208 --> 01:47:02,870 Lloyd! 1872 01:47:10,586 --> 01:47:12,884 You'll have to excuse my friend. 1873 01:47:12,921 --> 01:47:15,890 He's a little slow. 1874 01:47:15,924 --> 01:47:19,018 The town is back that way. 1875 01:47:28,670 --> 01:47:30,194 Wow. 1876 01:47:30,238 --> 01:47:32,138 Two lucky guys 1877 01:47:32,174 --> 01:47:34,267 are gonna be driving around with those girls 1878 01:47:34,309 --> 01:47:36,174 for the next couple of months. 1879 01:47:36,211 --> 01:47:38,873 Yeah, don't worry. 1880 01:47:38,914 --> 01:47:40,745 We'll catch our break too. 1881 01:47:40,782 --> 01:47:44,274 - Just gotta keep our eyes open. - Yeah. 1882 01:47:44,319 --> 01:47:45,752 # Now, we've been friends forever... # 1883 01:47:45,787 --> 01:47:47,185 # Now, we've been friends forever... # 1884 01:47:47,222 --> 01:47:49,918 - You're it. - You're it. 1885 01:47:49,958 --> 01:47:51,687 You're it. Quitsies. 1886 01:47:51,727 --> 01:47:53,695 You're it. Anti-quitsies, double-stamp. 1887 01:47:53,729 --> 01:47:56,254 You're it. Anti-quitsies, triple-stamp. 1888 01:47:56,298 --> 01:47:58,289 - No erasies, none at all. - You can't triple-stamp. 1889 01:47:58,333 --> 01:48:00,563 Yes, if you have a double-stamp, of course you can. 1890 01:48:00,602 --> 01:48:02,160 - You can't triple-stamp! - # La la la la la... # 1891 01:48:02,204 --> 01:48:04,172 You can't if you have a double-stamp! 1892 01:48:04,206 --> 01:48:05,969 You can't triple-stamp... the rule! 1893 01:48:06,008 --> 01:48:09,967 You can't triple-stamp a double-stamp, Lloyd! 1894 01:48:10,012 --> 01:48:12,845 Lloyd! Lloyd! 1895 01:48:14,082 --> 01:48:17,984 # And now we're rolling down the hill # 1896 01:48:19,888 --> 01:48:22,152 # Down the hill. # 1897 01:48:24,960 --> 01:48:28,623 # Here you go, way too fast # 1898 01:48:28,664 --> 01:48:30,996 # Don't slow down, you're gonna crash # 1899 01:48:31,033 --> 01:48:34,127 # You should watch, watch your step # 1900 01:48:34,169 --> 01:48:36,694 # Don't look out, gonna break your neck # 1901 01:48:36,738 --> 01:48:39,866 # So shut, shut your mouth # 1902 01:48:39,908 --> 01:48:42,274 # 'Cause I'm not listenin' anyhow # 1903 01:48:42,310 --> 01:48:45,336 # I had enough, enough of you # 1904 01:48:45,380 --> 01:48:48,076 # Enough to last a lifetime through # 1905 01:48:48,116 --> 01:48:51,108 # So what do you want of me? # 1906 01:48:51,153 --> 01:48:53,951 # Got no words of sympathy # 1907 01:48:53,989 --> 01:48:56,651 # And if I go around with you # 1908 01:48:56,692 --> 01:49:00,628 # You know that I'll get messed up too with you # 1909 01:49:05,400 --> 01:49:09,564 # Na-na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na-na # 1910 01:49:11,039 --> 01:49:15,772 # Na-na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na-na # 1911 01:49:15,811 --> 01:49:19,338 # Here you go, way too fast # 1912 01:49:19,381 --> 01:49:21,906 # Don't slow down, you're gonna crash # 1913 01:49:21,950 --> 01:49:24,885 # You don't know what's been going down # 1914 01:49:24,920 --> 01:49:27,388 # You've been runnin' all over town # 1915 01:49:27,422 --> 01:49:30,619 # So shut, shut your mouth # 1916 01:49:30,659 --> 01:49:33,059 # 'Cause I'm not listening anyhow # 1917 01:49:33,095 --> 01:49:36,189 # I've had enough, enough of you # 1918 01:49:36,231 --> 01:49:38,961 # Enough to last a lifetime through # 1919 01:49:39,000 --> 01:49:42,026 # So what do you want of me? 1920 01:49:42,070 --> 01:49:44,800 # Got no cure for misery # 1921 01:49:44,840 --> 01:49:47,400 # And if I go around with you # 1922 01:49:47,442 --> 01:49:50,138 # You know that I'll get messed up too # 1923 01:49:50,178 --> 01:49:52,976 # With you # 1924 01:49:53,014 --> 01:49:56,108 # With you # 1925 01:49:56,151 --> 01:49:59,416 # Na-na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na-na # 1926 01:49:59,454 --> 01:50:01,752 - # Slow down # - # You're gonna crash # 1927 01:50:01,790 --> 01:50:05,123 # Na-na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na-na # 1928 01:50:05,160 --> 01:50:07,526 - # Slow down # - # You're gonna crash # 1929 01:50:24,146 --> 01:50:27,138 # With you # 1930 01:50:27,182 --> 01:50:29,810 # With you # 1931 01:50:29,851 --> 01:50:33,309 # Na-na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na-na # 1932 01:50:33,355 --> 01:50:35,687 - # Slow down # - # You're gonna crash # 1933 01:50:35,724 --> 01:50:38,989 # Na-na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na-na # 1934 01:50:39,027 --> 01:50:41,257 - # Slow down # - # You're gonna crash # 1935 01:50:41,296 --> 01:50:44,697 # Na-na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na-na # 1936 01:50:44,733 --> 01:50:47,327 - # Slow down # - # You're gonna crash. # 1937 01:51:10,859 --> 01:51:14,761 # Well, if you want, I'll be by your side # 1938 01:51:14,796 --> 01:51:18,732 # And if you don't, maybe suicide # 1939 01:51:18,767 --> 01:51:22,203 # It's my love that'd kill me, dear # 1940 01:51:22,237 --> 01:51:25,934 # If you won't hold me and have me near # 1941 01:51:25,974 --> 01:51:29,501 # Because I'll be good to you in every way # 1942 01:51:29,544 --> 01:51:33,310 # I'll give you lovin', baby, every day # 1943 01:51:33,348 --> 01:51:36,943 # A lovin' that's good, a lovin' that's all right # 1944 01:51:36,985 --> 01:51:40,079 # A lovin' like an oven on the coldest night # 1945 01:51:40,121 --> 01:51:42,316 # Whoo! # 1946 01:51:54,903 --> 01:51:59,203 # 'Cause if you don't love me, I'll kill myself # 1947 01:52:02,277 --> 01:52:06,680 # Yeah, if you don't love me, I'll kill myself # 1948 01:52:09,484 --> 01:52:13,511 # If you don't love me, I'll kill myself # 1949 01:52:16,825 --> 01:52:21,159 # If you don't love me, I'll kill myself. # 1950 01:54:21,160 --> 01:54:23,960 Ripped by: SkyFury 1951 01:54:24,305 --> 01:55:24,307 Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/macb Help other users to choose the best subtitles141149

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.