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1
00:00:00,270 --> 00:00:03,501
In the sprawling dark of night,
2
00:00:03,503 --> 00:00:08,706
when all is still...
that's when it can be heard...
3
00:00:08,708 --> 00:00:10,708
The Hum...
4
00:00:10,710 --> 00:00:13,311
...a ceaseless, enigmatic tone,
5
00:00:13,313 --> 00:00:19,784
heard only by a gifted few,
its origin unknown.
6
00:00:19,786 --> 00:00:22,787
Electromagnetic energy?
7
00:00:22,789 --> 00:00:25,323
Alien transmission?
8
00:00:25,325 --> 00:00:30,328
Perhaps the echoes of some
distant alternate dimension.
9
00:00:30,330 --> 00:00:35,800
Perhaps even the sound of our very doom.
10
00:00:35,802 --> 00:00:37,802
If you ask me...
11
00:00:37,804 --> 00:00:39,938
I don't care.
12
00:00:39,940 --> 00:00:43,741
Because I prefer the hum...
13
00:00:45,745 --> 00:00:49,613
...of my tricked-out IROC Z28!
14
00:00:49,615 --> 00:00:51,683
- ♪ Unskinny bop ♪
- Whoo-hoo!
15
00:00:51,685 --> 00:00:54,552
- ♪ Just blows me away ♪
- Whoo-hoo!
16
00:00:54,554 --> 00:00:57,155
Enjoy the show, my babies!
17
00:00:57,157 --> 00:00:59,223
♪ All night and day ♪♪
18
00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:04,028
♪ Good morning, U.S.A. ♪
19
00:01:08,101 --> 00:01:09,901
Steve, I'm gonna tell you the same thing
20
00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:12,036
I said to Jackie
Collins that one time...
21
00:01:12,038 --> 00:01:15,106
No writing at the table
on barbecue chicken night.
22
00:01:15,108 --> 00:01:16,908
Sorry. I'm just trying to decide
23
00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:19,443
which school work-study
program to choose.
24
00:01:19,445 --> 00:01:21,206
It's either apprentice under weatherman
25
00:01:21,241 --> 00:01:23,982
Memphis Stormfront at Channel 3 News
26
00:01:23,984 --> 00:01:26,450
or Buckle at his urology clinic.
27
00:01:26,452 --> 00:01:29,521
Sounds like either way you're
gonna be dealing with drips.
28
00:01:29,523 --> 00:01:30,922
Pa-dum, shh!
29
00:01:30,924 --> 00:01:33,457
But which one guarantees
me a good grade?
30
00:01:33,459 --> 00:01:36,661
Which one is certain to put
me on the path to success?
31
00:01:36,663 --> 00:01:40,732
Oh, Steve, no one knows for
certain what the future holds.
32
00:01:40,734 --> 00:01:43,001
I just don't want to end up
being one of those losers
33
00:01:43,003 --> 00:01:44,802
who lives with their
parents as an adult.
34
00:01:44,804 --> 00:01:46,338
- Hey!
- Sorry. No, no.
35
00:01:46,340 --> 00:01:49,341
W-What I mean is I don't want
to be one of those poor dopes
36
00:01:49,343 --> 00:01:52,276
who lives their whole,
sad life in the town they grew up in.
37
00:01:52,278 --> 00:01:54,812
- Hey!
- So what, you're too good for us now?
38
00:01:54,814 --> 00:01:57,081
No! I love you guys! I do!
39
00:01:57,083 --> 00:02:01,485
It's just... I guess I've always
seen more for myself than,
40
00:02:01,487 --> 00:02:03,021
you know... this.
41
00:02:03,023 --> 00:02:04,356
- Hm.
- Hm.
42
00:02:04,358 --> 00:02:05,623
I feel ya, Steve.
43
00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:07,158
Big dreamers like you and me,
44
00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:09,227
we got to spread our golden wings.
45
00:02:09,229 --> 00:02:12,164
One day, we hit that open
road and never look back.
46
00:02:12,166 --> 00:02:16,568
Actually, Dad, when I say "this"...
47
00:02:16,570 --> 00:02:17,835
that includes you.
48
00:02:18,444 --> 00:02:19,503
Roger, quick!
49
00:02:19,505 --> 00:02:22,106
Bring the fainting divan!
50
00:02:22,108 --> 00:02:23,908
Sorry, Stan. Already in use.
51
00:02:23,910 --> 00:02:27,179
'Cause one of my personas just
received some shocking news.
52
00:02:27,181 --> 00:02:29,181
Everybody look the
other way for a second.
53
00:02:29,183 --> 00:02:32,250
- No.
- I already changed anyway.
54
00:02:32,252 --> 00:02:35,653
Walt Whipman,
whip-crack session musician.
55
00:02:35,655 --> 00:02:36,988
I provide the whip-crack sounds
56
00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:39,457
for the many kinds of
music that require them...
57
00:02:39,459 --> 00:02:41,926
"Rawhide"-style TV Western themes,
58
00:02:41,928 --> 00:02:44,462
Devo cover bands,
and the list goes on and on.
59
00:02:44,464 --> 00:02:46,998
Unfortunately,
I earned something of a reputation
60
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:49,267
back in the day for heavy drinking,
shaky hands,
61
00:02:49,269 --> 00:02:52,536
and always accidentally whipping
my fellow musicians in the face.
62
00:02:52,538 --> 00:02:55,874
Anyway, I just heard
my old musician pal Roscoe
63
00:02:55,876 --> 00:02:58,009
is now a big-shot producer in Nashville,
64
00:02:58,011 --> 00:03:01,746
which obviously means that it is...
comeback time!
65
00:03:01,748 --> 00:03:04,482
Why is there an ice cream
scoop in my whip holster?
66
00:03:04,484 --> 00:03:07,551
Can we please get back
to my real problem here?
67
00:03:07,553 --> 00:03:10,154
Which one of these work-studies
is the right choice?
68
00:03:10,156 --> 00:03:12,023
Oh, now you're looking for advice
69
00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:13,425
from your horrible family?
70
00:03:13,427 --> 00:03:14,626
Seriously.
71
00:03:14,628 --> 00:03:16,360
Just flip a coin, why don't you?
72
00:03:17,090 --> 00:03:18,696
Maybe that's all I can do.
73
00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:20,899
Does anybody else hear that hum?
74
00:03:20,901 --> 00:03:23,034
Well, here goes nothing...
75
00:03:26,506 --> 00:03:29,774
Looks like I'll be taking
my talents to Channel 3.
76
00:03:29,776 --> 00:03:31,443
Great, okay, whatever. Now...
77
00:03:31,445 --> 00:03:35,013
who's coming with me on
my journey of redemption?
78
00:03:38,034 --> 00:03:39,233
Look...
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00:03:39,235 --> 00:03:40,569
Up.
80
00:03:40,571 --> 00:03:42,905
Pack your shit.
We're going to Nashville.
81
00:03:46,744 --> 00:03:49,811
And over there is our star anchor,
Greg Corbin.
82
00:03:49,813 --> 00:03:51,413
Oh, we're actually neighbors.
83
00:03:51,415 --> 00:03:53,315
Hi, Mr. Corbin!
84
00:03:55,352 --> 00:03:56,952
Me, though, I'm an open book.
85
00:03:56,954 --> 00:03:59,821
You wanna know anything
about me, just ask.
86
00:03:59,823 --> 00:04:01,890
Well, one thing
I have always wondered...
87
00:04:01,892 --> 00:04:04,760
Is Memphis Stormfront your real name?
88
00:04:04,762 --> 00:04:06,694
Oh my, no.
89
00:04:06,696 --> 00:04:08,696
I sure would've been a born weatherman
90
00:04:08,698 --> 00:04:11,366
if my name was really
Memphis Stormfront.
91
00:04:11,368 --> 00:04:12,968
So what is your real name?
92
00:04:12,970 --> 00:04:14,102
Toledo Tornado.
93
00:04:14,104 --> 00:04:16,571
I changed it so no one
would find out I'm...
94
00:04:16,573 --> 00:04:17,773
...Italian.
95
00:04:17,775 --> 00:04:19,441
Now whaddya wanna see next?
96
00:04:19,443 --> 00:04:20,842
Oh, how about the Doppler?
97
00:04:20,844 --> 00:04:23,445
- The Doppler?
- Yeah, the Doppler 12,000.
98
00:04:23,447 --> 00:04:24,646
It's up on the roof, righ...?
99
00:04:24,648 --> 00:04:26,314
Who told you about the Doppler?
100
00:04:26,316 --> 00:04:27,983
The... announcer
101
00:04:27,985 --> 00:04:30,185
at the beginning of
every news broadcas...
102
00:04:30,187 --> 00:04:32,788
I don't have time right now.
It's actually pretty boring.
103
00:04:32,790 --> 00:04:34,922
It's a safety hazard.
The Doppler's off-limits.
104
00:04:34,924 --> 00:04:38,794
So just get the hell off
my back about it, okay?
105
00:04:38,796 --> 00:04:40,262
- Don't mind him.
- Ahh!
106
00:04:40,264 --> 00:04:42,263
He's weird about that Doppler.
107
00:04:42,265 --> 00:04:43,531
Oh, hey.
108
00:04:43,533 --> 00:04:44,600
W... What's your name?
109
00:04:44,602 --> 00:04:47,335
Gassup E. Piye. ["GOSSIPY P.A."]
110
00:04:47,337 --> 00:04:49,671
- French-Danish...?
- No.
111
00:04:49,673 --> 00:04:51,891
Memphis has been on edge lately.
112
00:04:51,926 --> 00:04:55,143
Probably because his forecast
accuracy has been way down.
113
00:04:55,145 --> 00:04:58,346
And he knows he's on thin ice.
114
00:04:58,348 --> 00:04:59,747
Poor Memphis.
115
00:04:59,749 --> 00:05:01,817
More like poor you!
116
00:05:01,819 --> 00:05:05,287
Because if Memphis gets the axe,
so does your work-study program.
117
00:05:06,890 --> 00:05:08,824
And it's too late to switch
to Buckle's urology clinic,
118
00:05:08,826 --> 00:05:11,293
because Barry already took that spot.
119
00:05:11,295 --> 00:05:12,494
That's right.
120
00:05:12,496 --> 00:05:14,630
I'm aware of Barry!
121
00:05:14,632 --> 00:05:15,897
Buh-byeeeeeeeee.
122
00:05:15,899 --> 00:05:17,299
Ahh! Stairs!
123
00:05:17,301 --> 00:05:19,034
Ow! Ooh!
124
00:05:19,036 --> 00:05:20,368
Oh! Ow! Ernngh!
125
00:05:20,370 --> 00:05:21,569
That's gotta hurt.
126
00:05:21,571 --> 00:05:23,639
Get away from me!
127
00:05:23,641 --> 00:05:25,173
And now we turn to the weather.
128
00:05:25,175 --> 00:05:26,574
What've you got for us, Memph?
129
00:05:26,576 --> 00:05:28,844
Cold, Greg, and lots of it.
130
00:05:28,846 --> 00:05:31,179
Perfect conditions for
tomorrow's first ever
131
00:05:31,181 --> 00:05:34,516
Langley Classic Outdoor
Hockey Invitational.
132
00:05:34,518 --> 00:05:39,588
So pack an extra set of clamps,
'cause it's gonna be nippy.
133
00:05:40,600 --> 00:05:41,724
_
134
00:05:41,725 --> 00:05:45,793
The entire starting lineup
of the Roanoke Ice Wasps
135
00:05:45,795 --> 00:05:48,930
is dead because of your faulty forecast!
136
00:05:48,932 --> 00:05:52,668
And I had thirty bucks
on that game, Toledo.
137
00:05:52,670 --> 00:05:54,602
Mannaggia dio!
138
00:05:54,604 --> 00:05:58,273
The late, great Dickie Dobbins
never had this kind of trouble.
139
00:05:58,275 --> 00:06:01,543
Using the very same Doppler as you,
I might add.
140
00:06:01,545 --> 00:06:02,944
You leave the Doppler out of this!
141
00:06:02,946 --> 00:06:06,081
You screw up just one more time,
and you'll be...
142
00:06:06,083 --> 00:06:08,283
Does anyone else hear
that humming sound?
143
00:06:08,285 --> 00:06:10,352
No? Nobody?
144
00:06:10,354 --> 00:06:12,488
Out on your ass!
145
00:06:12,490 --> 00:06:14,022
Ha-cha!
146
00:06:14,024 --> 00:06:15,823
You're gonna fire me, old man?
147
00:06:15,825 --> 00:06:18,293
Well how 'bout I wick-ah wick-ah!
148
00:06:18,295 --> 00:06:19,427
How 'bout that?
149
00:06:19,429 --> 00:06:21,563
Mr. Stormfront, do you think
150
00:06:21,565 --> 00:06:23,965
after all these wrong forecasts,
151
00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:25,901
maybe we should check out the Doppler
152
00:06:25,903 --> 00:06:27,435
to make sure it's working right?
153
00:06:27,437 --> 00:06:28,704
The Doppler is fine!
154
00:06:28,706 --> 00:06:30,171
Hey, check this out.
155
00:06:30,173 --> 00:06:31,439
Roundhouse!
156
00:06:31,441 --> 00:06:32,974
Ooh! Ow.
157
00:06:32,976 --> 00:06:36,044
It's just, I really don't want
to lose this work-study...
158
00:06:36,046 --> 00:06:37,179
Shhh.
159
00:06:37,181 --> 00:06:41,249
Iss's lissning!
160
00:06:41,251 --> 00:06:44,520
Ssay away from the Bloppler, kid.
161
00:06:44,522 --> 00:06:46,454
Stay...
162
00:06:46,456 --> 00:06:47,723
away...
163
00:06:47,725 --> 00:06:50,125
Screw this. I'm checking it out.
164
00:06:55,865 --> 00:06:57,599
The Doppler's not even plugged in
165
00:06:57,601 --> 00:06:59,735
to the station's computer system.
166
00:06:59,737 --> 00:07:02,004
He hasn't been using it at all.
167
00:07:10,548 --> 00:07:12,548
Alright, nothing too out of the...
168
00:07:22,490 --> 00:07:24,025
Oh, my God.
169
00:07:24,027 --> 00:07:26,694
That thing doesn't forecast the weather.
170
00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:27,829
It shows...
171
00:07:27,831 --> 00:07:29,297
the future.
172
00:07:29,299 --> 00:07:30,898
Then again, I'm pretty sure I saw
173
00:07:30,900 --> 00:07:32,300
Snot winning Prom King in there,
174
00:07:32,302 --> 00:07:35,103
so maybe it's just a
bunch of random B.S.
175
00:07:35,490 --> 00:07:38,039
- _
- Sure, it was all just part of a cruel prank
176
00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:39,574
planned by the popular kids...
177
00:07:39,576 --> 00:07:42,510
and, I have reason to believe,
some of the teachers...
178
00:07:42,512 --> 00:07:46,514
but I'm still just
absolutely over the moon!
179
00:07:53,858 --> 00:07:57,125
Ssay away from the Bloppler, kid.
180
00:07:57,127 --> 00:07:58,593
What could be so dangerous
181
00:07:58,595 --> 00:08:02,197
about takin'
a little peep into the ol' futuro?
182
00:08:06,603 --> 00:08:08,670
Wh... is this...
183
00:08:08,672 --> 00:08:12,474
the mayor's mansion?
184
00:08:12,476 --> 00:08:13,675
This is...
185
00:08:13,677 --> 00:08:16,478
tomorrow.
186
00:08:16,480 --> 00:08:18,280
Delilah, darling!
187
00:08:18,282 --> 00:08:20,214
I have grand news!
188
00:08:20,216 --> 00:08:23,418
The Sharks are going
to the championship!
189
00:08:23,420 --> 00:08:26,488
The game was such a rout
that I left early and...
190
00:08:26,490 --> 00:08:27,622
What??
191
00:08:27,624 --> 00:08:29,357
Coach Trey?
192
00:08:29,359 --> 00:08:31,093
My best friend?!
193
00:08:31,095 --> 00:08:33,095
Jimmy, it's not what it looks like!
194
00:08:33,097 --> 00:08:35,029
We're not just resting in bed together.
195
00:08:35,031 --> 00:08:38,500
Until a few seconds ago
we were having sex, too.
196
00:08:39,970 --> 00:08:42,704
You'll pay for this, cuckolder!
197
00:08:42,706 --> 00:08:44,306
Just bear with me one sec.
198
00:08:44,308 --> 00:08:47,442
- Jimmuh! Jimmuh, baybuh, please.
- Stop and think!
199
00:08:47,444 --> 00:08:49,778
- Oh Jimmuh, baybuh.
- It didn't mean nothin'! Please!
200
00:08:49,780 --> 00:08:51,113
Look at my neck, it's pleading with you!
201
00:08:51,115 --> 00:08:52,580
Baby, we can talk about this, Jimmuh!
202
00:08:52,582 --> 00:08:53,782
You don't wanna do this, Jimmy!
203
00:08:58,522 --> 00:08:59,988
Oh, my God!
204
00:08:59,990 --> 00:09:02,124
I have to do something!
205
00:09:02,126 --> 00:09:05,327
Incredible tip on that
playoff blowout, Steve.
206
00:09:05,329 --> 00:09:06,929
That's just the kind of
thing that can earn a boy
207
00:09:06,931 --> 00:09:10,598
an A plus on his work-study,
if you catch my meaning.
208
00:09:10,600 --> 00:09:12,467
Wink!
209
00:09:12,469 --> 00:09:14,068
Wink wink wink!
210
00:09:16,473 --> 00:09:19,942
Roscoe, thank you so much
for agreeing to meet me here.
211
00:09:19,944 --> 00:09:21,876
I... didn't.
212
00:09:21,878 --> 00:09:23,545
You and your...
213
00:09:23,547 --> 00:09:24,879
boyfriend?
214
00:09:24,881 --> 00:09:26,281
Followed me in here.
215
00:09:26,283 --> 00:09:28,150
Well, you're looking great,
I'll tell you that.
216
00:09:28,152 --> 00:09:30,619
Except for that... yuck, on your face.
217
00:09:30,621 --> 00:09:32,554
- What happened there?
- You...
218
00:09:32,556 --> 00:09:34,289
whipped me, many years ago...
219
00:09:34,291 --> 00:09:36,625
Oh, God, I was hoping not to talk shop,
220
00:09:36,627 --> 00:09:38,026
but since you brought it up,
221
00:09:38,028 --> 00:09:41,095
I'm guessing you've seen my ad
in the country music trades?
222
00:09:41,097 --> 00:09:43,365
Dammit. That's supposed
to say "whip crack."
223
00:09:43,367 --> 00:09:45,767
Well, I was pretty drunk
when I ordered the ad.
224
00:09:45,769 --> 00:09:47,101
But I've cleaned up since then,
225
00:09:47,103 --> 00:09:50,505
and now I'm totally sober
and ready to lick crack.
226
00:09:50,507 --> 00:09:51,906
You know what I mean.
227
00:09:51,908 --> 00:09:53,908
Listen, Walt, now I am about to record
228
00:09:53,910 --> 00:09:56,044
a new Rawhide-style TV Western theme,
229
00:09:56,046 --> 00:09:58,981
and am in desperate need of a whip man,
230
00:09:58,983 --> 00:10:02,985
but it's just...
all those faces you whipped.
231
00:10:02,987 --> 00:10:05,453
Now you listen to me, Race Car.
232
00:10:05,455 --> 00:10:07,656
You have to give this man another shot.
233
00:10:07,658 --> 00:10:10,880
Without second chances,
where would any of us be?
234
00:10:10,915 --> 00:10:14,062
Didn't America give the South
a second chance
235
00:10:14,064 --> 00:10:15,397
after the Civil War?
236
00:10:15,399 --> 00:10:18,333
Sure, that one turned out
to be a huge mistake,
237
00:10:18,335 --> 00:10:23,005
but the point still stands,
and that point is...
238
00:10:23,007 --> 00:10:25,139
Something about Roger?
239
00:10:25,141 --> 00:10:26,141
Walt.
240
00:10:26,143 --> 00:10:27,209
Whipman.
241
00:10:27,211 --> 00:10:28,810
Whipcrack session musician.
242
00:10:28,812 --> 00:10:32,547
Alright, I'll give you one shot.
243
00:10:32,549 --> 00:10:35,483
Say, you fellas hear that
strange kinda humming sound?
244
00:10:35,485 --> 00:10:36,818
No.
245
00:10:36,820 --> 00:10:39,388
Here, would you mind covering
your face up with this napkin?
246
00:10:42,092 --> 00:10:44,759
Day after day, just one hot sports tip
247
00:10:44,761 --> 00:10:46,695
and news scoop after another.
248
00:10:46,697 --> 00:10:48,030
And now I'm rich!
249
00:10:48,032 --> 00:10:50,032
Rich as Sir Topham Hatt!
250
00:10:50,034 --> 00:10:52,234
How do you do it, Steven?
251
00:10:52,236 --> 00:10:53,301
Heh.
252
00:10:53,303 --> 00:10:55,570
- J... Just lucky, I guess.
- Here.
253
00:10:55,572 --> 00:10:57,906
Help yourself to a Todd
McFarlane figurine.
254
00:10:57,908 --> 00:10:59,842
Oh, don't mind if I d... ohhh.
255
00:11:06,383 --> 00:11:08,783
Are you alright?
256
00:11:08,785 --> 00:11:11,786
Yeah, just a little...
257
00:11:11,788 --> 00:11:13,255
black ooze.
258
00:11:18,062 --> 00:11:19,994
You've been using it, haven't you?
259
00:11:21,398 --> 00:11:22,464
Haven't you?
260
00:11:22,466 --> 00:11:26,068
Do you have any idea what
forces you're tampering with?
261
00:11:26,070 --> 00:11:28,536
Forces of good...?
262
00:11:28,538 --> 00:11:31,005
Why do you think I stopped
using the damn thing?
263
00:11:31,007 --> 00:11:33,408
Well, you'll soon find out for yourself
264
00:11:33,410 --> 00:11:37,612
what it is to be both
terrified and enthralled by it,
265
00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:40,348
to despise and desire it.
266
00:11:40,350 --> 00:11:45,554
You inside of it and it inside of you.
267
00:11:45,556 --> 00:11:47,489
I gotta go.
268
00:11:47,491 --> 00:11:50,492
Oh, Mommy, oh, Mommy, oh, Mommy.
Here I come, Mommy!
269
00:11:50,494 --> 00:11:52,761
And now our very own Memphis Stormfront
270
00:11:52,763 --> 00:11:54,829
joins us with a look
at the weekend weather.
271
00:11:54,831 --> 00:11:56,164
Memph?
272
00:11:56,166 --> 00:11:59,367
Not all that is old was once young.
273
00:11:59,369 --> 00:12:02,837
Not all that's forgotten is gone.
274
00:12:02,839 --> 00:12:08,042
The nameless one,
dreaming of fire, but slumbers,
275
00:12:08,044 --> 00:12:12,647
to awaken some cursed,
blood-wrought dawn.
276
00:12:13,850 --> 00:12:15,183
Sounds like it's gonna be a hot one.
277
00:12:15,185 --> 00:12:16,851
Stay kooky, Memphis.
278
00:12:16,853 --> 00:12:20,388
Okay, clearly I should not be
tampering with that Doppler.
279
00:12:20,390 --> 00:12:21,523
Well, yeah.
280
00:12:21,525 --> 00:12:24,459
Besides, I'm pretty sure I've got that A
281
00:12:24,461 --> 00:12:26,461
on my work-study locked up already,
282
00:12:26,463 --> 00:12:31,265
so I am never using the Doppler again.
283
00:12:31,267 --> 00:12:33,135
Right after one teensy little look-see
284
00:12:33,137 --> 00:12:36,338
to make sure it's an A plus.
285
00:12:48,819 --> 00:12:51,419
Oh, God, my family!
286
00:12:51,421 --> 00:12:53,087
No!
287
00:12:53,089 --> 00:12:55,023
Noooooooo!
288
00:12:55,025 --> 00:12:57,091
Do you mind?
289
00:12:57,093 --> 00:12:59,361
Are you enjoying the show?
290
00:13:01,031 --> 00:13:05,400
No, God, nooooo!
291
00:13:09,106 --> 00:13:10,706
Listen to me! Please!
292
00:13:10,708 --> 00:13:12,374
Something terrible is coming!
293
00:13:12,376 --> 00:13:15,110
Oh, more terrible than your family?
294
00:13:15,112 --> 00:13:17,713
I'm sorry I hurt your feelings, okay?
295
00:13:17,715 --> 00:13:20,982
But some kind of monster is coming,
296
00:13:20,984 --> 00:13:22,850
and it's gonna kill us all!
297
00:13:24,654 --> 00:13:25,921
Please!
298
00:13:25,923 --> 00:13:28,991
We have to get out of here and
try to find someplace safe!
299
00:13:30,260 --> 00:13:32,060
Ahh!
300
00:13:37,267 --> 00:13:40,668
He's gotta have something here
that explains the Doppler,
301
00:13:40,670 --> 00:13:42,804
that monster, all of it.
302
00:13:42,806 --> 00:13:45,006
Pornography, pornography...
303
00:13:45,008 --> 00:13:47,609
creepy ancient scroll, pornography...
304
00:13:47,611 --> 00:13:51,012
Wait a minute!
305
00:13:51,014 --> 00:13:53,949
Wow, an interview with Adrien Brody.
306
00:13:53,951 --> 00:13:56,017
I'll just save this for later.
307
00:13:56,019 --> 00:13:58,086
Wait a minute!
308
00:13:58,088 --> 00:14:00,422
A creepy ancient scroll!
309
00:14:00,424 --> 00:14:01,957
My pornography!
310
00:14:01,959 --> 00:14:04,292
And scroll.
311
00:14:04,589 --> 00:14:07,629
- Ahh!
- Mr. Stormfront! Please, no!
312
00:14:07,631 --> 00:14:09,097
Ahh!
313
00:14:10,434 --> 00:14:14,236
God, how I wish he'd never
left me that damned orb.
314
00:14:14,238 --> 00:14:16,972
What is the Doppler, really?
315
00:14:16,974 --> 00:14:19,040
It isn't a Doppler at all.
316
00:14:19,042 --> 00:14:21,709
It's some kind of
ancient alien instrument
317
00:14:21,711 --> 00:14:25,581
that Dickie Dobbins found buried
deep beneath the Mojave Desert.
318
00:14:25,583 --> 00:14:28,516
It gave him the ability
to see the future...
319
00:14:28,518 --> 00:14:31,587
the power of absolute certainty.
320
00:14:31,589 --> 00:14:34,189
Mm, yeah, man's desire for certainty.
321
00:14:34,191 --> 00:14:35,523
Been kind of a theme lately.
322
00:14:35,525 --> 00:14:38,393
But in the end... it killed him.
323
00:14:38,395 --> 00:14:40,796
Are you sure he didn't
just die of being...
324
00:14:40,798 --> 00:14:42,530
you know, super old?
325
00:14:42,532 --> 00:14:44,199
He was 32!
326
00:14:44,201 --> 00:14:46,401
But that's what the thing does to you.
327
00:14:46,403 --> 00:14:49,271
Decays you. Twists your soul.
328
00:14:49,273 --> 00:14:53,809
So much so that some even
come to want to summon...
329
00:14:53,811 --> 00:14:55,143
The creature.
330
00:14:55,145 --> 00:14:56,612
What is it?
331
00:14:56,614 --> 00:15:00,682
It's a being so terrifying,
it's impossible to even describe.
332
00:15:00,684 --> 00:15:04,820
Face of an eel, arms like giant squids,
333
00:15:04,822 --> 00:15:10,091
classic dragon's body,
six wobbly baby giraffe legs,
334
00:15:10,093 --> 00:15:14,896
standing an immeasurable
3,097 feet tall!
335
00:15:14,898 --> 00:15:16,031
It is...
336
00:15:16,033 --> 00:15:19,567
B'thazalom, the Nameless One!
337
00:15:19,569 --> 00:15:22,638
The Nameless One's name is B'thazalom?
338
00:15:22,640 --> 00:15:26,041
Please don't be a dick about this, okay?
339
00:15:26,043 --> 00:15:27,509
Oh, my God.
340
00:15:27,511 --> 00:15:29,845
The Doppler and the monster...
341
00:15:29,847 --> 00:15:31,313
B'thazalom the Nameless.
342
00:15:31,315 --> 00:15:33,448
Uh-huh. They're linked.
343
00:15:33,450 --> 00:15:37,252
The Doppler has been sending
out these vibrations to it,
344
00:15:37,254 --> 00:15:38,786
waking it up.
345
00:15:38,788 --> 00:15:39,855
I'm impressed.
346
00:15:39,857 --> 00:15:41,589
You're scroll-reading at
a twelfth-grade level.
347
00:15:41,591 --> 00:15:45,193
So the only way to make
certain it stays buried
348
00:15:45,195 --> 00:15:47,529
is to destroy the Doppler.
349
00:15:47,531 --> 00:15:49,797
Roger sure would've been
handy to have around
350
00:15:49,799 --> 00:15:51,466
for all this cosmic crap.
351
00:15:51,468 --> 00:15:54,069
He better be doing
something really important.
352
00:15:59,276 --> 00:16:02,010
♪ Racin', pacin', chasin' ♪
353
00:16:02,012 --> 00:16:04,479
♪ Make those dogies hasten ♪
354
00:16:04,481 --> 00:16:06,482
♪ Though your chaps are chafin' ♪
355
00:16:06,484 --> 00:16:09,084
♪ Gotta bring those heifers home ♪
356
00:16:09,086 --> 00:16:14,289
♪ Cow driiive ♪
357
00:16:14,291 --> 00:16:19,561
♪ Cow driiive ♪
358
00:16:19,563 --> 00:16:21,096
♪ Take 'em in, turn 'em out ♪
359
00:16:21,098 --> 00:16:22,297
♪ Round 'em up, rub 'em down ♪
360
00:16:22,299 --> 00:16:23,565
♪ Take it off, make 'em shout ♪
361
00:16:23,567 --> 00:16:24,966
♪ Bring a friend, go to town ♪
362
00:16:24,968 --> 00:16:30,105
♪ Cow driiiiiiiiii... ♪
363
00:16:30,107 --> 00:16:35,110
♪ Cow driiiiiiiiii... ♪
364
00:16:37,447 --> 00:16:39,981
♪ ...iiiiive ♪
365
00:16:39,983 --> 00:16:41,316
Whip crack!
366
00:16:41,318 --> 00:16:43,251
- Oh, crap!
- Damn it!
367
00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:46,788
Alright, just download an mp3
of a whip and let's go home.
368
00:16:46,790 --> 00:16:49,057
Wait, no, I can do this!
369
00:16:53,330 --> 00:16:56,265
Ahh!
370
00:17:02,806 --> 00:17:04,139
Ahh!
371
00:17:04,141 --> 00:17:06,007
It's defending itself, Steve!
372
00:17:06,009 --> 00:17:09,945
Blasting your mind with the
most horrible things imaginable!
373
00:17:09,947 --> 00:17:12,013
Ahh!
374
00:17:15,085 --> 00:17:16,284
Ahh!
375
00:17:24,428 --> 00:17:26,161
It's all over.
376
00:17:26,163 --> 00:17:30,298
You don't know how right you are.
377
00:17:30,300 --> 00:17:31,567
No.
378
00:17:31,569 --> 00:17:33,901
You had it wrong, Steve.
379
00:17:33,903 --> 00:17:36,772
The orb wasn't waking the Nameless One.
380
00:17:36,774 --> 00:17:40,442
It was the only thing keeping it asleep.
381
00:17:40,444 --> 00:17:43,511
I never was able to bring
myself to destroy it,
382
00:17:43,513 --> 00:17:45,246
but then it showed me...
383
00:17:45,248 --> 00:17:48,650
It showed me that you
would do it for me.
384
00:17:48,652 --> 00:17:54,189
And now, thanks to you,
B'thazalom rises!
385
00:18:00,397 --> 00:18:01,929
Aw, [BLEEP] A!
386
00:18:01,931 --> 00:18:04,800
You gotta admit, that's sick as hell.
387
00:18:08,205 --> 00:18:10,005
What have I done?
388
00:18:21,885 --> 00:18:26,354
There's only one true certainty
in this world, Steve...
389
00:18:26,356 --> 00:18:29,825
that eventually, it must end!
390
00:18:29,827 --> 00:18:31,627
Why, Mr. Stormfront?
391
00:18:31,629 --> 00:18:33,629
What's in all this for you?
392
00:18:33,631 --> 00:18:38,099
Well, I assume I'll be rewarded
with mighty cosmic power...
393
00:18:39,703 --> 00:18:41,303
Ahh!
394
00:18:50,914 --> 00:18:55,050
Natalie, what in the heck is
all that racket out there?
395
00:18:55,052 --> 00:18:57,185
Some kind of behemoth from
beyond time and space,
396
00:18:57,187 --> 00:18:58,520
Dr. Buckle.
397
00:18:58,522 --> 00:19:01,056
Oh, for the love of Pete...
398
00:19:13,136 --> 00:19:15,871
Oh, thank God! I'm not too late.
399
00:19:19,142 --> 00:19:21,343
Nooooo!
400
00:19:22,746 --> 00:19:24,412
Steve, get in!
401
00:19:24,414 --> 00:19:25,813
You're alive!
402
00:19:25,815 --> 00:19:27,349
Yeah, after you said
all that crazy stuff,
403
00:19:27,351 --> 00:19:29,551
we decided to pack up the car,
just in case.
404
00:19:29,553 --> 00:19:31,619
And when we didn't find
you at the TV station...
405
00:19:31,621 --> 00:19:33,555
You came back here to look for me?
406
00:19:33,557 --> 00:19:36,824
Of course we did. We're your family.
407
00:19:36,826 --> 00:19:40,628
And that's the one thing you
can always be certain of.
408
00:19:40,630 --> 00:19:43,098
I actually voted to leave you behind.
409
00:19:46,636 --> 00:19:48,636
Oh, God, it's horrible!
410
00:19:48,638 --> 00:19:50,772
My whipping comeback went horrible!
411
00:19:50,774 --> 00:19:51,839
Hang on, gang.
412
00:19:51,841 --> 00:19:53,841
The world may be ending, but the Smiths
413
00:19:53,843 --> 00:19:57,312
will always live on to
have further adventures.
414
00:20:01,518 --> 00:20:03,051
Or maybe not.
415
00:20:03,053 --> 00:20:04,319
It's too late.
416
00:20:04,321 --> 00:20:06,254
This really is the end...
417
00:20:06,256 --> 00:20:07,723
of...
418
00:20:07,725 --> 00:20:10,258
everything.
419
00:20:40,424 --> 00:20:42,624
Does anybody else hear that hum?
420
00:20:42,626 --> 00:20:45,027
Well, here goes nothing.
421
00:20:47,497 --> 00:20:49,364
Looks like I'll be taking my talents
422
00:20:49,366 --> 00:20:54,569
to the Buckle Group's Cash
Only Walk-In Urology Center.
423
00:20:54,571 --> 00:20:58,106
I mean, but c'mon.
You gotta do Channel 3.
424
00:20:58,108 --> 00:20:59,842
Buh-bye. See you soon.
425
00:21:02,168 --> 00:21:03,829
- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.addic7ed.com
30503
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