Original subtitles

[laughs]

Are you going night night?

Night night.

Hey, good night.

Listen good night.

-Okay. -Good night.

[laughs]

Sweet dreams.

See you tomorrow.

I love you.

[mumbles]

Peace out, dude.

No!

[both laugh]

[Kat] Lacey was a great mom.

Garnett, he was a happy little boy.

He didn't have a care in the world.

[woman chuckling]

[laughing]

I remember Lacey posting this picture.

And, clearly, you can see by the look on his face, he's excited.

He was excited for a new adventure.

The whole scenario is completely

loaded with what ifs, what ifs, what ifs.

Nana.

Nana.

Papa.

Na-Papa.

I guess when something like this happens,

it makes you, literally, go back and rethink everything.

[male news reporter 1] Detectives started searching

the Chestnut Ridge Fellowship Community.

The retirement center was where Lacey Spears worked and lived with her son.

[opening theme music playing]

[intense music playing]

[bird caws]

So, right now, we're at the base

of the Fellowship Community,

the property stretches over here.

This is where Lacey Spears lived.

After incident that happened,

we were coming here several times a week

to interview different people, to talk to different people in the community.

Pretty much, uh, this is where the investigation started.

The Fellowship Community, they keep to themselves.

So, when people keep to themselves,

the unknown creates mysteries in people's minds,

and they don't know what's going on with them.

But there wasn't a lot of crime going on here at all.

That is, until this case.

[Mallory] Decatur is a small town,

that everyone knows everyone and it's really homey.

Very nice, family town.

A lot of people moved back from college

to raise their kids here.

When I was in kindergarten, I met Lacey.

She was in my class and she was my very best friend.

I remember we'd play dress up in kindergarten.

Our teacher had this big box

and you could just go through it and pick out anything.

We always were playing house.

And she would always want to be the mom,

and I would always have to be the dad.

She always wanted to make sure she was taking care of the babies.

You could just tell, she always wanted to be a mom.

That was the life she wanted.

[Kat] This used to be childcare network.

This is where Lacey and I used to work together,

where she had the infant room and I had the toddler room.

Miss Lacey was one of the best childcare provider teachers

a parent with a new child could ever ask for.

She cared for them as if they were her own.

At childcare network,

probably the best memory was the Subway lunches every day.

That was, literally, our lunch every day for a year.

She would eat half a sub, and I'd eat the other half of the sub

while the babies were napping.

That was our gossip hour.

We talked about everything and nothing, all at the same.

Lacey was very young,

but she seemed like she had her whole life figured out at 20.

Like, "I'm going to finish school, I want a baby."

But she didn't want a man.

She didn't want a baby daddy or anything like that.

She knew that she could do it on her own.

Nobody ever understood how she was going to do it on her own financially.

But she made it work.

She was over the moon.

"I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant. I can't wait. I can't believe it."

And that's when we started picking out names over our Subway lunches.

And she was like, "Well, what do you think about Garnett Paul Spears?"

And I said, "Lacey, you can't do that."

I said, "His initials will be GPS.

Why would you do that to him?"

She was like,

"Only you would think of that."

I said, "You're welcome."

[hospital monitor beeping]

The day Garnett-Paul Thompson Spears was born

was absolutely amazing.

She did great delivering.

He came out happy and healthy.

He was perfect, in every essence of the word, he was perfect.

But when Lacey had his birth certificate done,

there was no father's name listed.

[Mallory] At first, I just thought,

you know, "The dad wasn't involved,"

something along those lines.

And then, I read on her blog how, you know, he was taken from her.

[reading] "One year ago today, my soul mate and son's father

was involved in an automobile accident that claimed his life," she wrote.

"I was in no way prepared for this experience.

I lost a part of myself that horrible night and I'll never get it back.

He had a beautiful country accent, a heart-warming smile,

joyous laugh and an amazing soul.

We miss him every morning and every night."

I thought, "That is terrible,

and here she is, raising this kid, and he has no dad."

It broke my heart.

She's doing everything she can,

and, now, she's lost the love of her life.

Lacey was an open book

until it came to that.

And then she was like,

very, very private.

She didn't want to talk about.

As soon as she came home, and was feeling better and everything like that,

she was back in day care,

and Garnett was with her and, um.

She was like any other new mom.

Everything was amazing.

And then this.

[hospital monitor beeping]

One day, she called in sick,

and I was having to cover her shifts and my shifts.

I said, "Why? Why is Lacey not coming in today? Where is Lacey?"

She said, "Garnett's bleeding from his eyes and his ears."

I'm just, "I'm sorry, how?

Do we know how this is happening?"

With regard to Garnett's health, he had, um,

what the doctors would term a, "Failure to thrive," issue.

The early issue that Garnett was having, was the acid reflux.

The constant acid reflux into his esophagus

can cause long-term damage to him.

And what they did was a surgical procedure of his stomach

in order to prevent the acid from refluxing back up into his esophagus,

into his, you know, his windpipe.

One of the other issues that needed to be addressed

was his ability to get nourishment from eating.

And because he was not a consistent eater as a baby,

the doctors in Alabama determined that he needed another medical procedure,

and that medical procedure was to insert a feeding tube

which went from the outside of his abdomen in directly into his stomach.

It's called a G-tube.

[Kat] Every time he was in the hospital, that's when I would call her,

"Hey, what's going on with Garnett?"

"He's fine. He's laying here asleep."

She was always by his side.

[Lacey] Look at the front of him.

Look at the front of him.

What's special about him? Look at his belly.

Oh, what is it? Oh, that.

What does he have?

[Lacey] He has a G-tube just like you.

[Mallory] I learned about the moving to New York on Facebook,

and the reasoning was that

this would be the best way for her to take care of him.

[Riebling] One of the points that was important to Lacey

in moving to the Fellowship Community

was the type of lifestyle, sort of, like a farm environment.

And eating holistically,

and eating natural foods was important to her.

Plus, given all the medical concerns

that Garnett had for his digestion,

feeding and everything like that, that was also

a recommended, sort of, lifestyle

from the types of doctors that she was dealing with.

-Go? -[Lacey] Go.

[Kat] The last time I seen her and Garnett,

we had lunch at Chick-fil-A.

And she was moving to New York.

[Lacey] What do we need to do?

[with a lisp] Get the show on the road.

[Lacey] Get the what on the road?

The show on the road.

[Kat] I remember kissing Garnett on the cheek

and telling him Aunt Kathy loved him.

And I said, "You be good for Mama."

Lacey always promised to visit,

but when she moved to New York,

I never saw her again.

That's the picture that Lacey had posted

when they were in New York.

And that was also his first day of kindergarten.

"I walked to school."

I remember Lacey posting this picture.

His favorite color was red, definitely.

Almost everything he wore was red.

Whoa!

[Kat] He had a red cape,

he had red shoes and he was so proud of them.

He was so excited.

Whatever journey she drug him on, he was excited for it.

[Lacey] ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

Blow your candles out.

What?

Oh, they all blowed out.

[Lacey] Happy birthday, Garnett.

[Kat] She had Garnett's whole life on social media.

I tried to keep up with it, but she would have oodles,

like, hundreds and hundreds of thousands on Facebook and Instagram.

Sometimes she would post about his medical illnesses.

That this was so many times that he'd been in the hospital

or Garnett had another seizure.

It was just gut wrenching.

[Mallory] She was such a loving mother,

and she wanted the best for her son,

and her followers were really positive toward her.

And there were some people on there

that just followed her that she'd never even met before.

They were just so supportive.

[hospital monitor beeping]

[Riebling] Garnett's sodium level was dangerously high,

and there are physical reactions

that the body has as a result.

He complained of issues with eating, vomiting, retching,

and what they need to do

is they need to reverse the effects

of the hypernatremia, the elevated salt level.

Part of the evaluation was,

"What was the cause."

The doctors did not know.

[Kat] His sodium levels were extremely accelerated.

"So is he having a chemical reaction? Is this chemical?

Is, like, body chemicals, are they imbalanced?

Is that why his sodium is elevated?"

And I called her and I was like,

"Lacey, what are they telling you?

They have to have answers at this point."

And she was like, "They're not telling me anything.

They're just saying his sodium levels are through the roof."

[Riebling] Throughout the day on January 19th,

what you see on the video from the hospital

is that they give him medications

to abate the symptoms that he's having.

And over the course of the next 24 to 36 hours,

Garnett Spears, by everyone's account,

returns to his baseline neurological state.

He's talking, he's laughing,

he's able to communicate as he normally would.

[Kat] Lacey had posted on Facebook

that the hospital was going to release him

and he was going to go home 'cause he was healthy,

his sodium levels had leveled out to safe levels.

I was most definitely relieved.

"Okay, finally, he's going to get to go home."

[Mallory] She posted a picture,

and he had all this stuff on his head,

and he was sitting in the bed eating,

and she's looking at him so peacefully and sweet.

He was so happy.

He looked like he was going to be all right.

And...

And then, it was weird because the next thing I know,

he was having seizures.

[Riebling] So what happens later in the day,

is that Garnett's symptoms return,

but they're worse this time.

Garnett is prompting his mother

that he has to go to the bathroom,

and he does this repeatedly.

That night, she checks on Garnett.

And you can you can see in her reaction,

um, the emotion and the fear of what's happening.

She looks at his face and she recoils,

and then, immediately sprints out of the room.

She was screaming for help.

She was desperate for help.

You could really get a sense and a feel for her terror in that moment.

And a determination was made to airlift Garnett from Nyack

to Westchester County Medical Center.

[Mallory] I was at work and I read the post

they were airlifting him to a different hospital.

And I was thinking, "Oh my stars,

like, this really escalated really quickly.

What is going on?"

So I made sure to keep my phone by me

so I knew, you know, I could keep up with the update.

You know, she was very good about posting and making sure

that we were all up to date on what was going on.

[Kat] It was probably somewhere between 24 and 48 hours later,

she posted that he had took an immediate turn for the worse

and he was on life support.

There was a life support post

and then, there was a post about saying the doctors had come in

and said that Garnett is brain dead.

And then,

it was probably six hours after that.

The last post was, "Garnett the Great journeyed onward."

I fell to the floor.

I couldn't believe it.

He was gone.

A boat.

[sniffles]

Okay, how do I...

Hop. Ah.

He was absolutely full of life.

He was just like Lacey.

He was full of life, he was happy.

He got up in a good mood.

[laughs]

[Kat] There was nothing you could do to make him sad.

[Garnett] Whoa.

He was, I mean, he was just the sweetest little boy.

And he loved his Mama.

[laughs]

I went home, and all the way home,

I cried, and I cried, and I cried

and I went, got my son and I held on to him and I just cried.

It was just so much to think about.

Here he was, in that bed, a few hours ago, and now he's died.

We just didn't understand why.

[laughing]

My name is Daniel Carfi.

I was a detective

assigned to the Westchester County Police

in Hawthorne, New York.

And I was called by my supervisor.

He had information that he had received

from Detective Kirk Budnick from the Ramapo Police Department,

that there was a child in the Medical Center.

I was met by a doctor,

and that doctor gave me some background, what had happened.

The child, he had come from another hospital with high sodium levels.

Quite frankly, I'm not a doctor,

I didn't know what does this mean.

And she, basically, explained to me

that she believed it was a good possibility

that it was an outside source causing the sodium levels to be so high.

Basically, the child was poisoned.

I do remember seeing and being around Lacey.

She would sit in the doorway,

and she would watch Garnett play on the playground just a little bit,

and that she would do that in the early mornings

before everybody else got here.

She would let him, kind of, get some of that early morning energy out.

'Cause he was full of energy, just like his mama.

I'm pretty sure she gave him coffee every morning.

He acted like it.

But, I mean, he listened to his mama.

I don't recall ever seeing him

not be just a normal, happy little boy.

[Carfi] Obviously, we start with the mother, right?

She's the closest with the child.

She's a single mom.

She's with him all the time.

When I first talked to Lacey, she had a demeanor

of a caring mother,

and, really, wanted to know

what mistake the hospital made.

My thought, at the time, was maybe he got the wrong medication.

That was my first guess,

the hospital did not handle it right.

They're under investigation for something they did wrong

because this child should still be alive,

like, this was so dramatic.

And traumatic, I mean, it just went so fast.

It seemed like something happened in between the steps.

Like, there was something missing that I didn't know.

[Budnick] We got the list of all the medicines that the doctors had put him on,

and we started looking it up to see what they actually were.

And from all the initial research that we did,

nothing appeared that it could spike a sodium level like that.

So the only way that something could have happened

was it would have had to been introduced into his body.

[Mallory] One day, I was contacted by detectives.

They were just asking me questions about the Lacey.

It really took me for a loop.

I was like, "There is no way.

That is her baby.

Like, she adores him.

She is, like, the best mom.

Like, no way possible."

[chuckles sharply]

Mama.

[Lacey] Where did you go?

I'm here, you play with me.

[Lacey] I am playing with you.

Play with me in the bathtub.

[Budnick] When we started to go through her social media,

you could see that Lacey would post

when Garnett was in hospitals or going to doctors.

So it was a road map for us to follow.

What we learned was Garnett, in his first year of life,

had been to the hospital or to a doctor

for serious claims over 24 times.

The things his mother would take him for were severe.

She would complain about seizure activity,

throwing up, not being able to eat.

It just seemed like an awful lot.

[Kat] She had made the statement more than one time

that Garnett wasn't thriving.

He wasn't getting the nutrients he needed.

And I would question her

because there's just certain things

that just doesn't make sense to me.

How is he not getting the nutrients he needs when you breastfed him?

[Lacey] Get a big bite.

[indistinct]

[woman] Good stuff, huh?

[Mallory] I started looking back at a lot of stuff.

And then, I remember that I had a friend

that actually hung out with Garnett,

and he was eating hot dogs.

She was like, "He ate everything and he wanted another one."

She was like, "He was starving."

I was like, "Oh, my goodness."

Butterfly.

[woman] Yeah, butterfly toast.

[Carfi] I had looked at hundreds and hundreds of pictures.

Hundreds of pictures, and many, many videos.

He would be eating cookies or eating ice cream.

Whenever he was eating,

you know, I would look at him and say,

"This kid doesn't appear to be sick

or have any trouble eating."

Mommy, hey.

[Carfi] Talking to doctors and nurses,

we learned that the feeding tube

should have really been taken out at some point.

Doctors, nurses,

medical professionals would give Lacey advice that she would just not take.

She would not do what they said.

In fact, sometimes, she would get angry,

shut them down, not talk to them again as a result.

[Budnick] Every time Lacey was told that the feeding tube was an issue,

she would either move away or she would change doctors.

[Carfi] She kept moving around,

eventually, moving out of state.

So she goes from Alabama to Florida,

and, eventually, New York.

Nothing seemed to change by changing states.

Garnett's symptoms were still there.

[Budnick] During that period of time, online,

she would put out there how sick her child was.

She was getting attention from people around the world.

Oh, girl.

She got a lot of attention.

She posts everything and, like,

it's almost like she flirted with oversharing.

Like, why did I have to see

that Garnett was basically dying on Facebook?

Why did anybody need to see that?

I think Lacey craved attention and she craved to be the center of attention.

She was a very quiet person, but wanted to be seen.

[Mallory] A lot of people ended up giving her diapers and food

and toys, clothes, they gave her all kinds of things.

I donated money and a lot of people donated money.

So there's a way on Facebook, you can just directly deposit in someone's account.

[Kat] At that time, I didn't know how she got her money,

but she always had money to do whatever she wanted to.

It wasn't, "Oh, I have to wait till my payday,"

'cause you know, normal people live paycheck to paycheck.

If she wanted something, she went and got it.

I was friends with her on one of her accounts.

And I didn't know that she had multiple Facebook accounts.

If you're blocked, you don't know it exists.

She kept that a really good secret.

[Budnick] It appeared that she had three different accounts that she would post on.

Some of them would be for family,

some would be for close friends,

and then, others were for just everybody else that would log on.

[Carfi] One of them talked a lot about Garnett's father,

a gentleman named Blake Robinson,

who had died in a car crash.

But we found out that he was still alive.

[Mallory] I remember, like, right after high school

at a football game, I saw her.

And she had a little boy with her,

and I asked her, "Who is this little boy?"

And she said that it was her son.

And I thought, "Wow, I didn't realize that she had a son

'cause that means she would've been pregnant in high school,

and I don't remember that."

And, later, I found out that it wasn't her little boy.

And I remember going back and asking her after she had Garnett.

I was like, "Don't you have two little boys?"

And she was like, "No, I just have him."

It blew me away.

And I just remember a group of girls talking

and one of the girls was like, "You know, that's Lacey,

you don't know what to believe."

[Carfi] There were things that Lacey would post,

claiming that Garnett's father

was a former police officer from Alabama

who perished in a car crash some years earlier.

But early on, I knew I couldn't believe her

when she told the story about Garnett's father, Blake Robinson,

because the picture we found in her social media

was a screenshot of another person

who was not the real Blake Robinson.

Blake Robinson is an actual person.

[Budnick] Blake was alive and well when we spoke with him.

He was actually a deputy in the Sheriff's Department down where she lived.

He had gone out on a date with her twice,

and never had anything to do with her after that.

He had no idea that she was claiming this.

He couldn't even come up with a reason

why she picked him to say he was the father.

[Carfi] Garnett's real father turned out to be Christopher Hill,

who was a neighbor of Lacey

when she lived in Decatur, Alabama

with her sister in an apartment complex.

And there came an opportunity that we spoke to Chris,

and he explained us the whole relationship

that he had with Lacey, how he met her.

And, you know, how he helped her put some baby furniture together

and that's what ignited their relationship.

Chris was very open to being Garnett's father,

wanted to be Garnett's father early on,

and was actually there the day she gave birth and was asked to leave.

And told to stay away and go away or she'd call the police.

So he obeyed her wishes and stayed back.

But a paternity test later on, which Chris agreed to,

it was determined that he was, in fact, the father.

[Kat] I had looked him up on Facebook 'cause I was being nosy.

And the most recent post he had posted was,

"Today is a difficult day, I lost a son I never had."

I can't help but think that Garnett will always be in the back of his mind.

[Mallory] I learned about that from a detective.

And I'm just like, "Whoa."

You know, "This is a lot to take in."

I remember looking back on her Facebook,

and seeing that he had posted and saying, "Our sweet child."

I was in a lot of shock.

So I was thinking...

I still wanted to believe the good in her

but everything she told anyone was a lie.

"So if in the passing days, you see a police car as you drive,

walk up on a dragonfly, perhaps you see an owl one night,

think of us, our journey, and most of all, Blake."

She should have wrote books.

That's a great story.

It's just heart-breaking that she would write something like this

and it never happened.

[Kat] Around that time, I talked to her on the phone.

She told me, she said, "Be careful what you say.

I can't talk about a lot 'cause I'm being watched.

I think they think I did it.

Kathy, I didn't do it. Kathy, I didn't do it."

I said, "Why would they think you did it?

What support do they have?

I mean, they're not just going to blatantly assume and make that accusation.

Lacey, what's going on?"

"I can't talk about it right now.

I love you."

And hung up the phone.

And I remember telling my first husband,

"Something's not right."

[Carfi] It was all part of a bigger picture, a puzzle, if you will.

We knew the why.

Of course, I wanted to know if she did this.

We needed to know how the high sodium came about.

We just needed the smoking gun.

[suspenseful music playing]

This is property of the Fellowship.

When we came here to do the search warrant,

I didn't know what to expect from the people that ran the community.

But they couldn't have been more cooperative with us.

When we walked into the apartment,

the whole house was neat.

Nothing was out of place.

Toys were put away,

almost as if she cleaned it up right before we got there.

That's when we came across, what we looked at,

it looked like a shrine was set up.

There was a picture of Garnett on a table

with these holistic medicines lined up

that Lacey had explained to Detective Carfi

that that's what she was treating him with.

All of the medicines on the list were there,

along with a large container of table salt.

In the middle of the room was a feeding machine

with a feeding bag, some type of formula that was in the bag.

The following morning,

I received a call from someone from the Fellowship

stating that one of Lacey's friends, Valerie,

reported that she received a phone call from Lacey

asking her to come to the apartment,

go in, remove the feeding bag that was on the pump,

and destroy it and not tell anybody.

Those items were brought to the Westchester County Police,

where I brought them to the medical lab to have them tested.

It was determined that in one of the feeding bags,

mixed in with this baby formula

that she was feeding Garnett through his feeding tube,

was the equivalent of 69 salt packets.

[Budnick] We were, at this point...

I, actually, felt that we had enough to arrest her.

And then, at a certain point, I was informed that there was actually a video

in Nyack Hospital that gave a view of Garnett's bed.

I got a copy of that video.

Phew.

I remember sitting at my desk, I was watching the video.

I couldn't believe what I saw.

And I watched it over and over and over.

Slow motion. Stop. Pause.

I called people over, I said, "Look at this, tell me what you see.

I'm not going to tell you what I see, you tell me what you see."

And we all saw the same thing.

[Carfi] The tape, basically, showed Garnett lying sideways across his mother's legs,

and he seems happy and ready to be discharged.

And then, the doctors come in.

They were telling her that, "Garnett looks great, we're going to discharge you."

Soon as those doctors and nurses leave, a few moments later,

Lacey walks by with what appears to be a feeding tube in her hand.

It appeared that in her one hand she has a container.

She brought that into that bathroom

that would connect up to his feeding tube.

[Carfi] She had brought salt to the hospital

and was giving it to him through his feeding tube.

It was just a horrific, horrific scene to watch.

[Kat] Remember the first time I seen, "The video."

And that's when it all set in.

And my exact words were, "Hang her."

"She doesn't deserve to breathe the same oxygen as anybody else."

The very last conversation with Lacey, after Garnett passed,

she said, "Kathy, I was screaming,

'Help my baby, help my baby,' and they wouldn't help him.

The nurses just stood there and looked at him."

It's not even what happened.

It's all on camera.

She said, "Do you believe I killed Garnett?"

And I said, "Yes, I do."

[female news reporter] The medical examiner of Westchester County

says 5-year-old Garnett Spears was murdered.

[male news reporter 2] She spent, roughly, half an hour to 45 minutes

inside the police station

before being led away in an unmarked black car just right of me here.

She's headed to Westchester County Court,

where she is expected to be arraigned.

We were informed by several doctors that there was a chance

that this was a case of Munchausen by proxy.

When I first heard the term, I, obviously, went back to my office

and I researched everything I could on the illness.

And I realized that, most of the articles that I read

had indicators, if you will,

on people who suffer from Munchausen syndrome by proxy.

Lacey Spears met those indicators.

She fit the bill.

-[judge 1] Are you Lacey Spears? -Yes, sir.

[judge 1] Do you waver reading and enter a plea of not guilty?

We waver reading and enter pleas of not guilty

to both counts of the indictment.

Lacey was being charged with murder in a second degree,

and assault in the first degree.

I was the partner and the lead trial attorney for Lacey Spears.

Our client is telling us it wasn't her.

She was 100% innocent of what occurred.

And she never wavered from that position.

So the only rational response to that is, "We're going to go to trial."

[Riebling] Lacey took Garnett to Nyack Hospital for medical care.

Lacey shows us

how much she loved Garnett.

How much he cared for him.

Most importantly, the very, very deep regard

that she had for the value of his life.

[Carfi] I felt like somebody has to stand up for Garnett.

Somebody has to get justice for Garnett

somehow, someway, in this case.

We explained to the jury about the sodium that was found in the feeding bag.

And we played the video.

I thought that video evidence would seal any jury's thoughts on giving a guilty verdict.

[judge 2] Members of the jury answering through your foreperson...

She was able to fool a lot of people for a long time.

[judge 2] ...How say you as to count one murder in the second degree?

Not guilty or guilty?

But you could fool all the people.

[foreperson] Guilty.

[judge 2] Is this verdict unanimous?

[foreperson] Yes.

[laughs] Peekaboo!

My opinion of Lacey Spears is that she is pure evil.

What led her to do it? I don't know.

We did talk to other investigators who've done Munchausen by proxy cases.

A lot of them led us to believe that once a child is old enough

to explain to other people what's happening to them,

they're really not useful to their abuser.

And a lot of times, that's when the child will be killed.

Can you say your ABCs.

A, B, C, C, C. [laughs]

[Kat] My heart won't let me believe

that Lacey wanted to kill him.

I'll never

believe that she wanted to intentionally take his life.

I will spend the rest of my life

feeling and knowing

that she made him sick because she enjoyed the attention.

She bragged about it too much to not enjoy it.

I think in her mind, she thought,

if she made him just a little sicker,

enough to get a spike in that sodium,

that his stay would be continued.

But it was too much.

How do you do that?

I mean, he was just the sweetest little boy.

[Mallory] Garnett was such a happy kid, and he was loved.

He was just full of life,

and when you looked at his picture, you felt full of life.

Ooh, oh, my goodness, okay.

There's a lot of feelings I haven't felt in a long time.

[laughs] No, it's okay.

This is for Garnett. This is for Garnett.

It's so emotional for me.

It's also making me angry.

In that moment, he needed someone.

How scared he must be.

Like that's the thing that hit me,

how scared he must be.

He fought to survive, when in reality,

he fought to survive from what she was doing to him

from the beginning.

I just don't know how a parent could do that.