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0
00:02:01,579 --> 00:02:03,247
(Wind Whistling)
1
00:02:59,220 --> 00:03:03,015
- (Speaking Mandarin)
- (Gasps)
2
00:03:03,099 --> 00:03:04,474
(Creaking)
3
00:03:08,396 --> 00:03:09,396
(Clicks)
4
00:03:23,578 --> 00:03:25,704
(Speaking Mandarin)
5
00:03:49,479 --> 00:03:51,146
(Wind Whistling)
6
00:03:53,483 --> 00:03:54,942
(Swishing)
7
00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:07,162
Ugh!
8
00:04:12,418 --> 00:04:14,378
Boxers!
9
00:04:14,462 --> 00:04:15,545
(Blade Clinks)
10
00:04:24,180 --> 00:04:25,847
(Metal Clinking)
11
00:05:00,550 --> 00:05:02,634
Not one step further.
12
00:05:03,219 --> 00:05:04,928
The keeper of the Imperial Seal,
13
00:05:06,597 --> 00:05:08,849
just the man I was looking for.
14
00:05:09,058 --> 00:05:10,058
Ah!
15
00:05:11,853 --> 00:05:13,061
A woman.
16
00:05:13,688 --> 00:05:15,772
You Chinese are
very progressive.
17
00:05:15,773 --> 00:05:17,024
Hai! Ai!
18
00:05:18,234 --> 00:05:19,651
(Grunting)
19
00:05:30,079 --> 00:05:31,079
Ugh!
20
00:05:38,254 --> 00:05:39,296
(Man Grunting)
21
00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:40,297
Yah!
22
00:05:42,633 --> 00:05:43,884
Ugh!
23
00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:48,180
(Clattering)
24
00:05:51,059 --> 00:05:52,142
Uhh.
25
00:05:52,518 --> 00:05:54,394
A gift from an old friend.
26
00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:56,855
FATHER: Wu Chow.
27
00:05:58,107 --> 00:06:00,650
He wanted me to
send his regards.
28
00:06:00,735 --> 00:06:02,778
Ugh! Aah!
29
00:06:05,448 --> 00:06:06,615
Father!
30
00:06:06,699 --> 00:06:09,034
Yah! Yah! Yah!
31
00:06:16,959 --> 00:06:18,794
(Breathing Heavily)
32
00:06:19,712 --> 00:06:21,671
(Panting And Grunting)
33
00:06:31,891 --> 00:06:33,266
(Exhales)
34
00:06:33,476 --> 00:06:34,935
(Clicking)
35
00:06:35,561 --> 00:06:36,978
(Creaking)
36
00:06:53,538 --> 00:06:54,830
(Gasps)
37
00:06:57,625 --> 00:06:58,667
Uh.
38
00:06:59,043 --> 00:07:00,919
(Breathing Heavily)
39
00:07:01,003 --> 00:07:02,170
Father.
40
00:07:03,631 --> 00:07:05,048
The Seal,
41
00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:07,050
you must get it back.
42
00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:10,429
I promise.
43
00:07:11,055 --> 00:07:12,180
Give this
44
00:07:13,307 --> 00:07:14,891
to your brother.
45
00:07:43,838 --> 00:07:45,172
(Chuckles)
46
00:07:45,756 --> 00:07:47,048
What are you reading?
47
00:07:48,384 --> 00:07:49,384
Oh.
48
00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:51,720
(Reading)
49
00:07:51,971 --> 00:07:53,138
It's incredible.
50
00:07:53,222 --> 00:07:55,265
Roy's just taken out the
Mummy's entire army
51
00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:56,975
of zombie confederate soldiers,
52
00:07:57,059 --> 00:07:58,935
and he only had one bullet.
53
00:07:58,936 --> 00:08:00,562
That's impossible.
54
00:08:00,646 --> 00:08:01,897
Oh, no, it's not.
55
00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:04,649
Roy figured out the
physics of the Canyon
56
00:08:04,734 --> 00:08:07,444
and then ricocheted a
bullet off the Canyon wall,
57
00:08:07,528 --> 00:08:09,237
nailed each zombie
through the heart.
58
00:08:10,364 --> 00:08:11,740
What about the Shanghai Kid?
59
00:08:11,741 --> 00:08:13,450
He was captured and
knocked out on page 10
60
00:08:13,534 --> 00:08:15,410
while he was polishing
Roy's pearl handles.
61
00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:16,578
Don't you worry.
62
00:08:16,579 --> 00:08:19,539
Roy's about to save him from
becoming a human sacrifice.
63
00:08:20,208 --> 00:08:22,501
Those stories are all lies.
64
00:08:22,585 --> 00:08:23,585
No. See?
65
00:08:23,669 --> 00:08:25,086
It says right here on the back,
66
00:08:25,087 --> 00:08:28,423
"Author Sage McCallister
bases all his stories"
67
00:08:28,424 --> 00:08:29,925
"on firsthand accounts."
68
00:08:30,426 --> 00:08:32,093
(Hoofbeats)
69
00:08:32,094 --> 00:08:33,762
(Whinnying)
70
00:08:52,031 --> 00:08:53,114
Sorry, Sheriff.
71
00:08:53,115 --> 00:08:54,449
No princess.
72
00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:00,830
Every day you meet
the noon stage,
73
00:09:00,915 --> 00:09:02,457
every day it's the same story.
74
00:09:03,543 --> 00:09:05,001
She's not coming back.
75
00:09:05,378 --> 00:09:08,380
Pei Pei's married to her
work in San Francisco.
76
00:09:08,464 --> 00:09:09,923
Modern woman.
77
00:09:10,132 --> 00:09:12,092
You got a parcel.
78
00:09:13,719 --> 00:09:15,470
Maybe it's from her!
79
00:09:15,555 --> 00:09:17,931
No. It's from my
sister in China.
80
00:10:07,106 --> 00:10:08,273
(Neighs)
81
00:10:08,357 --> 00:10:09,524
I know.
82
00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:16,615
I know. I must go.
83
00:10:16,699 --> 00:10:19,784
Stay here and be a good
horsey for the new sheriff.
84
00:10:25,166 --> 00:10:28,501
Uh, Sheriff, that
stage is headed east.
85
00:10:28,711 --> 00:10:31,129
Isn't China kind
of west of here?
86
00:10:31,380 --> 00:10:34,049
I'm not going to China.
I'm going to New York.
87
00:10:34,133 --> 00:10:35,675
Roy invested my money.
88
00:10:36,177 --> 00:10:39,554
Is it true that he lives in a
penthouse at the top of The Ritz
89
00:10:39,555 --> 00:10:41,139
surrounded by dozens
of beautiful women
90
00:10:41,223 --> 00:10:42,766
at his every Beck and call?
91
00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:44,309
That's the old Roy.
92
00:10:44,393 --> 00:10:46,394
He's married, settled down.
93
00:10:46,729 --> 00:10:49,064
Trust me, he's changed.
94
00:10:49,398 --> 00:10:50,398
(Squeak, Pop)
95
00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:51,900
So there we were,
96
00:10:51,984 --> 00:10:53,735
completely outnumbered.
97
00:10:53,736 --> 00:10:56,571
You didn't have to tell me
we didn't stand a chance.
98
00:10:56,572 --> 00:11:00,158
So I send the Shanghai Kid and
the Princess out the back.
99
00:11:00,242 --> 00:11:02,243
Poor Shanghai Kid. He
was so frightened.
100
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:04,788
He forgot to thank me
for saving his life.
101
00:11:04,872 --> 00:11:06,498
I'm used to that.
102
00:11:06,874 --> 00:11:08,667
I return to the front.
103
00:11:09,085 --> 00:11:10,460
And I counted to three,
104
00:11:11,170 --> 00:11:12,796
and I burst out of the mission,
105
00:11:12,797 --> 00:11:15,799
pearl handles blazing,
lead flying everywhere,
106
00:11:16,967 --> 00:11:18,802
and not a single
bullet touched me.
107
00:11:18,803 --> 00:11:20,136
(Gasps) No!
108
00:11:20,137 --> 00:11:21,179
Yeah.
109
00:11:21,263 --> 00:11:23,515
What happened to the
emperor's gold?
110
00:11:23,599 --> 00:11:24,766
We divided it up.
111
00:11:24,767 --> 00:11:27,936
I insisted on giving my share
to the Indians, of course.
112
00:11:28,020 --> 00:11:29,437
The savages?
113
00:11:30,398 --> 00:11:33,817
Please don't ever call those
noble people savages.
114
00:11:33,901 --> 00:11:35,276
If being proud of your body
115
00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:37,737
and wanting to ride around naked
all day makes you a savage,
116
00:11:37,738 --> 00:11:39,823
then, by God, you're
drinking with a savage.
117
00:11:39,907 --> 00:11:41,199
(Giggles)
118
00:11:41,867 --> 00:11:43,159
(Bell Dings)
119
00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:45,328
(Indistinct Conversations)
120
00:11:46,288 --> 00:11:47,455
(Laughter)
121
00:11:52,253 --> 00:11:54,129
(Slurping, Laughing)
122
00:11:55,297 --> 00:11:57,674
And that is what you
call a French toast.
123
00:11:57,675 --> 00:12:00,635
You are so sophisticated,
Mr. O'Bannon.
124
00:12:01,303 --> 00:12:02,303
(Clinking)
125
00:12:02,388 --> 00:12:03,471
ROY: Whoo!
126
00:12:03,889 --> 00:12:06,141
Who's up for some more bubbly?
127
00:12:08,686 --> 00:12:10,812
(Hands Tapping Rhythmically)
128
00:12:18,446 --> 00:12:20,321
Reach for the sky, Roy.
129
00:12:21,532 --> 00:12:22,991
Say that again.
130
00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:25,160
Reach for the sky, Roy.
131
00:12:26,078 --> 00:12:27,871
Chon Wang!
132
00:12:27,955 --> 00:12:29,664
You sly son of a gun!
133
00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:31,708
- Look at you.
- Look at you.
134
00:12:31,709 --> 00:12:32,917
What brings you to New York?
135
00:12:33,544 --> 00:12:35,003
My share of the gold.
136
00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:37,088
Refresh my memory. What
gold are we talking about?
137
00:12:37,173 --> 00:12:38,173
The emperor's gold.
138
00:12:39,508 --> 00:12:41,926
Okay, now, that gold is in
139
00:12:42,011 --> 00:12:44,763
what the Wall Street pros
call a long-term investment.
140
00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:46,848
We can't touch it
because it's building.
141
00:12:46,849 --> 00:12:47,849
I need it tonight.
142
00:12:47,933 --> 00:12:49,893
You just got here. Let's
celebrate a little bit.
143
00:12:49,894 --> 00:12:50,935
No. I don't have time.
144
00:12:51,020 --> 00:12:53,480
- You just got to the big city.
- My father's been killed.
145
00:12:56,192 --> 00:12:57,192
Oh.
146
00:12:57,693 --> 00:12:59,652
Aw, Chon, I'm...
147
00:13:00,362 --> 00:13:02,030
You need the money to get
back for the funeral?
148
00:13:02,031 --> 00:13:05,533
No. I must go to England.
The ship leaves tonight.
149
00:13:05,534 --> 00:13:07,035
Your father died in England?
150
00:13:07,036 --> 00:13:09,496
China. My sister followed
the murderer to London.
151
00:13:10,206 --> 00:13:11,372
(Stuttering)
152
00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:13,208
I'm a little bit mixed up.
153
00:13:13,209 --> 00:13:15,585
Let me see if I can get
the facts straight.
154
00:13:15,669 --> 00:13:18,546
You have a sister? You never
told me you had a sister.
155
00:13:18,547 --> 00:13:20,799
Is she pretty or does she look
like you, Chon? Be honest.
156
00:13:20,883 --> 00:13:23,218
Roy, I need my money!
157
00:13:23,511 --> 00:13:25,386
I don't like that tone of voice.
158
00:13:25,471 --> 00:13:28,056
You think after all we've
been through I'd stiff you?
159
00:13:28,057 --> 00:13:29,140
In case you hadn't noticed,
160
00:13:29,225 --> 00:13:30,558
I'm doing pretty
well for myself.
161
00:13:30,643 --> 00:13:31,726
Yeah.
162
00:13:32,895 --> 00:13:33,978
I'm sorry, Roy.
163
00:13:34,063 --> 00:13:35,605
That's okay.
164
00:13:35,606 --> 00:13:37,732
You're going through a
really tough time right now.
165
00:13:37,733 --> 00:13:39,567
You got to be more
trusting of people, okay?
166
00:13:39,568 --> 00:13:41,444
Look at me. It's Roy.
167
00:13:41,445 --> 00:13:43,655
The couple at table
five is ready to order.
168
00:13:43,739 --> 00:13:45,865
(Indistinct Conversations)
169
00:13:47,868 --> 00:13:49,118
Do you work here?
170
00:13:49,119 --> 00:13:50,495
No, I don't work here.
171
00:13:50,579 --> 00:13:52,956
It looks like these guys are
wearing a similar jacket.
172
00:13:52,957 --> 00:13:54,749
Roy, here's your
cut of the tips.
173
00:13:54,750 --> 00:13:56,417
(Coins Clinking)
174
00:13:59,004 --> 00:14:00,630
(Inhales)
175
00:14:00,714 --> 00:14:02,841
It's the craziest thing.
I guess...
176
00:14:02,925 --> 00:14:04,509
I guess because I
come in here so much,
177
00:14:04,593 --> 00:14:06,261
they're mistaking
me for a waiter.
178
00:14:06,262 --> 00:14:08,763
- It's embarrassing.
- You lost the gold.
179
00:14:10,099 --> 00:14:11,349
Not all of it.
180
00:14:11,433 --> 00:14:12,433
Where's the rest?
181
00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:14,435
I have one word for you,
182
00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:15,770
zeppelin.
183
00:14:16,397 --> 00:14:18,022
I need my money now!
184
00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:19,774
- Easy, easy.
- (Laughter)
185
00:14:21,694 --> 00:14:23,134
Will you do anything
for this money?
186
00:14:23,195 --> 00:14:25,154
Yes. I must leave tonight.
187
00:14:25,155 --> 00:14:27,282
Okay. Take this key.
188
00:14:27,366 --> 00:14:29,117
Go to the room. Get cleaned up.
189
00:14:29,118 --> 00:14:30,535
Your old pal Roy's got a plan.
190
00:14:30,619 --> 00:14:32,287
Go! Come on!
191
00:14:48,470 --> 00:14:50,305
Howdy, big boy.
192
00:14:50,848 --> 00:14:51,848
(Door Opens)
193
00:14:51,932 --> 00:14:52,932
(Gasps)
194
00:15:01,567 --> 00:15:02,817
What?
195
00:15:02,902 --> 00:15:05,653
There's a woman in there! She
wants me to sleep with her.
196
00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:06,905
Of course she does.
197
00:15:06,989 --> 00:15:08,865
I told her the Great Wall
ain't the only big thing
198
00:15:08,866 --> 00:15:10,199
coming out of China.
199
00:15:10,200 --> 00:15:11,367
Why did you say that?
200
00:15:11,368 --> 00:15:12,660
So you could get the money.
201
00:15:12,745 --> 00:15:14,871
I will not sleep with
women for money!
202
00:15:14,872 --> 00:15:17,582
Why? I'm gonna sleep
with her for money.
203
00:15:18,876 --> 00:15:21,544
Chon, just go in there
and do your business
204
00:15:21,545 --> 00:15:23,504
and think about your
sister in England.
205
00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:25,340
- What?
- Roy!
206
00:15:25,341 --> 00:15:26,382
Duty calls.
207
00:15:26,467 --> 00:15:27,508
Roy!
208
00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:34,515
Good evening, Mr. Mayor.
209
00:15:34,683 --> 00:15:36,017
Where are they?
210
00:15:36,018 --> 00:15:37,310
Who?
211
00:15:37,394 --> 00:15:38,436
Ugh!
212
00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:40,021
My daughters.
213
00:15:40,022 --> 00:15:41,105
1 Oth floor.
214
00:15:46,362 --> 00:15:47,820
(Ringing)
215
00:15:48,322 --> 00:15:50,323
Roy, you got trouble.
216
00:15:51,033 --> 00:15:52,075
Roy!
217
00:15:52,159 --> 00:15:53,242
I got to check on something.
218
00:15:53,243 --> 00:15:54,994
I'll be right back.
219
00:15:57,623 --> 00:15:59,123
Chon, new plan. We got to go.
220
00:15:59,208 --> 00:16:00,875
Chon, what are you doing?
221
00:16:00,876 --> 00:16:02,293
I'm fixing her back.
222
00:16:02,378 --> 00:16:04,671
Put her down, you
decadent philistine.
223
00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:05,922
Ugh!
224
00:16:05,923 --> 00:16:06,923
Ugh!
225
00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:08,049
Hey, Chon.
226
00:16:08,133 --> 00:16:09,217
Come on, let's go!
227
00:16:09,885 --> 00:16:11,427
- Bye-bye!
- Bye.
228
00:16:11,512 --> 00:16:12,720
Come on!
229
00:16:13,347 --> 00:16:14,806
(Sighs)
230
00:16:15,057 --> 00:16:17,058
I don't understand.
What's going on?
231
00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:18,601
I don't have time to explain.
232
00:16:18,602 --> 00:16:20,979
All you have to know is
there are bad men after us,
233
00:16:21,063 --> 00:16:22,563
but I'm in the right.
234
00:16:22,648 --> 00:16:23,731
Roy.
235
00:16:24,066 --> 00:16:27,318
Chon, come on, you gotta
trust me on this one.
236
00:16:27,403 --> 00:16:28,403
Okay, look.
237
00:16:28,487 --> 00:16:31,114
I'm in a transitional phase
in my life right now.
238
00:16:31,198 --> 00:16:32,448
But what?
239
00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:36,536
You want to know the truth?
240
00:16:36,954 --> 00:16:38,413
I'm a little lost right now.
241
00:16:38,414 --> 00:16:40,456
You've got a sense of purpose.
242
00:16:40,541 --> 00:16:41,749
But look at me.
243
00:16:41,750 --> 00:16:44,085
I'm a 30-year-old waiter/gigolo.
244
00:16:44,586 --> 00:16:46,587
Where's the future in that?
245
00:16:51,927 --> 00:16:53,136
So, what's the plan?
246
00:16:53,220 --> 00:16:55,263
You were always
my compass, Chon.
247
00:16:55,347 --> 00:16:57,515
The plan. You ask me
the right questions.
248
00:16:57,599 --> 00:16:59,851
The plan? The plan, I think,
249
00:16:59,935 --> 00:17:01,352
is to find the right woman,
250
00:17:01,437 --> 00:17:03,813
raise a lot of children,
and teach them values...
251
00:17:03,814 --> 00:17:06,482
No, Roy, the plan
to get out of here.
252
00:17:06,734 --> 00:17:08,443
Okay, the plan. Here we go.
253
00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:12,613
(Ding)
254
00:17:17,202 --> 00:17:18,578
(Whistling)
255
00:17:18,787 --> 00:17:19,996
(Gasping)
256
00:17:19,997 --> 00:17:21,998
- Cops! Cops!
- They can help us.
257
00:17:21,999 --> 00:17:23,833
No, no. Chon, not these cops.
258
00:17:23,834 --> 00:17:25,293
These are dirty cops.
259
00:17:25,377 --> 00:17:26,836
They take advantage of people.
260
00:17:27,087 --> 00:17:31,215
Now, if they stop us, remember,
I'm not Roy O'Bannon.
261
00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:32,967
Who are you?
262
00:17:33,135 --> 00:17:36,345
I'm your friend Smoky
Desperado from the west.
263
00:17:36,430 --> 00:17:37,680
And who am I?
264
00:17:37,765 --> 00:17:39,807
You... You're Benihana.
265
00:17:40,392 --> 00:17:41,476
Benihana.
266
00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:42,685
Yeah. You teach, uh...
267
00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:45,521
You teach crippled children
yoga here in the city.
268
00:17:45,522 --> 00:17:46,647
Okay, you go first.
269
00:17:46,732 --> 00:17:48,733
No! Why me?
270
00:17:48,817 --> 00:17:50,902
Because you blend in, okay?
271
00:17:51,153 --> 00:17:52,361
Now, go!
272
00:17:52,362 --> 00:17:54,280
Don't let them see you!
273
00:17:55,783 --> 00:17:56,949
Benihana.
274
00:18:00,829 --> 00:18:02,246
(Laughter)
275
00:18:13,383 --> 00:18:15,176
Hey! Hey!
276
00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:24,769
Ohh!
277
00:18:24,853 --> 00:18:26,062
Aah!
278
00:18:26,063 --> 00:18:27,438
(Grunting)
279
00:18:34,947 --> 00:18:35,947
Ohh!
280
00:18:36,031 --> 00:18:37,156
Ugh!
281
00:18:57,010 --> 00:18:58,386
Ohh! Aah!
282
00:18:59,388 --> 00:19:00,513
Aah!
283
00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:19,073
Psst!
284
00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:20,241
Chon!
285
00:19:20,909 --> 00:19:22,285
Come on, stop wasting time.
286
00:19:27,374 --> 00:19:28,457
You!
287
00:19:28,458 --> 00:19:30,084
Chon, I found our
ticket out of here.
288
00:19:31,837 --> 00:19:33,296
ROY: We're on our way.
289
00:19:33,380 --> 00:19:35,298
Looks like old Roy
came through again.
290
00:19:35,299 --> 00:19:37,341
Just like old times, Chon.
291
00:19:37,426 --> 00:19:39,135
MAN 1: Check over there!
292
00:19:39,219 --> 00:19:40,761
Over to the alley!
293
00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:42,096
MAN 2: That way!
294
00:19:45,767 --> 00:19:48,269
Yeah, just like old times.
295
00:19:48,478 --> 00:19:50,198
Will you forget about
the gold for a second?
296
00:19:50,272 --> 00:19:51,939
You're gonna have more money
than you ever dreamed of
297
00:19:51,940 --> 00:19:54,358
when that first
zeppelin takes off.
298
00:19:54,443 --> 00:19:56,527
Why do I always believe you?
299
00:19:56,820 --> 00:19:58,446
What do you mean?
300
00:19:59,072 --> 00:20:00,615
You're lucky I didn't invest
301
00:20:00,616 --> 00:20:03,367
in that ridiculous
automobile idea.
302
00:20:03,619 --> 00:20:05,369
Yeah, that's gonna
make a lot of money.
303
00:20:11,543 --> 00:20:13,336
(Seagulls Crying)
304
00:20:18,050 --> 00:20:19,133
(Footsteps)
305
00:20:28,477 --> 00:20:30,019
(Whimpering)
306
00:20:30,479 --> 00:20:31,896
What's that?
307
00:20:32,064 --> 00:20:33,814
I'm in the doghouse.
308
00:20:35,484 --> 00:20:37,151
Oh, come on, Chon.
309
00:20:37,819 --> 00:20:39,320
Look, I'm sorry I lied.
310
00:20:39,321 --> 00:20:41,864
I just didn't want
to disappoint you.
311
00:20:43,992 --> 00:20:45,201
That's exactly what I mean.
312
00:20:45,202 --> 00:20:46,911
I can't take that look.
313
00:20:47,621 --> 00:20:49,664
I learned it from my father.
314
00:20:49,665 --> 00:20:51,999
That's how he used
to look at me.
315
00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:55,670
What did your Dad do? Was
he an Imperial Guard?
316
00:20:55,754 --> 00:20:56,837
No.
317
00:20:56,838 --> 00:20:58,631
Much more important.
318
00:20:59,925 --> 00:21:02,134
He was the keeper of
the Imperial Seal.
319
00:21:02,469 --> 00:21:03,761
That's what I love about China,
320
00:21:03,845 --> 00:21:06,472
everybody's job description
sounds so damn cool.
321
00:21:06,848 --> 00:21:09,725
The Seal has been symbol
of the emperor's power
322
00:21:09,726 --> 00:21:10,977
since Genghis Khan.
323
00:21:11,353 --> 00:21:14,355
It has been passed down from
one emperor to another.
324
00:21:14,523 --> 00:21:18,025
My family have been watching
over it for 12 generations.
325
00:21:18,110 --> 00:21:19,568
Twelve generations?
326
00:21:21,029 --> 00:21:24,073
My father and I used to
skip stones across the moat
327
00:21:24,074 --> 00:21:28,035
and talk about a day I would
follow his footsteps.
328
00:21:30,372 --> 00:21:32,123
I was his only son.
329
00:21:32,749 --> 00:21:36,210
If I'd have been there, I
could have protected him.
330
00:21:36,211 --> 00:21:38,629
It's not your fault. You
were 3,000 miles away.
331
00:21:42,217 --> 00:21:43,634
What's with that little box?
332
00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:47,430
My sister sent it to
me from my father.
333
00:21:48,890 --> 00:21:50,224
There's a message inside.
334
00:21:50,309 --> 00:21:51,726
What's it say?
335
00:21:51,810 --> 00:21:54,061
It's a puzzle box. I don't
know how to open yet.
336
00:21:54,229 --> 00:21:56,439
You don't know how to open it?
Get a hammer and smash it open
337
00:21:56,523 --> 00:21:57,815
so you can see what it says.
338
00:21:57,899 --> 00:21:59,692
I must have patience.
339
00:22:00,569 --> 00:22:02,445
By the time I'm able to open it,
340
00:22:02,529 --> 00:22:04,071
I will be ready to
read the message.
341
00:22:04,072 --> 00:22:05,614
Oh, come on, Confucius,
342
00:22:05,699 --> 00:22:07,491
that's the corniest
thing I've ever heard.
343
00:22:10,620 --> 00:22:12,246
Let me see this.
344
00:22:13,582 --> 00:22:14,874
(Sighs)
345
00:22:15,876 --> 00:22:17,001
You know what?
346
00:22:17,586 --> 00:22:18,919
We're gonna go to England.
347
00:22:19,004 --> 00:22:20,588
We're gonna find
your Dad's killer.
348
00:22:20,672 --> 00:22:22,048
We're gonna get that seal back.
349
00:22:22,215 --> 00:22:23,674
There's no reward for this, Roy.
350
00:22:23,842 --> 00:22:25,176
Who said anything
about a reward?
351
00:22:25,177 --> 00:22:28,179
I'm talking about
friendship, loyalty, honor.
352
00:22:28,722 --> 00:22:29,805
Okay?
353
00:22:31,224 --> 00:22:32,475
Thank you, Roy.
354
00:22:35,479 --> 00:22:37,313
And I hear England is ass soup,
355
00:22:37,522 --> 00:22:39,648
a lot of pretty girls there.
356
00:22:41,276 --> 00:22:42,902
(Bell Tolling)
357
00:22:47,282 --> 00:22:49,450
(Indistinct Conversations)
358
00:22:49,910 --> 00:22:51,619
(Gavel Bangs)
359
00:22:51,703 --> 00:22:54,121
First order of
business, my lords,
360
00:22:54,623 --> 00:22:58,334
is a report from our esteemed
friend Lord Rathbone
361
00:22:58,627 --> 00:23:03,130
who recently returned from a
diplomatic mission to China.
362
00:23:14,309 --> 00:23:15,851
Fellow lords,
363
00:23:16,603 --> 00:23:19,855
I'm afraid I bring disturbing
news from the Orient.
364
00:23:21,149 --> 00:23:23,234
The opium wars have
ravaged the land.
365
00:23:23,318 --> 00:23:25,528
The emperor's enemies
are organizing.
366
00:23:25,987 --> 00:23:28,406
The most vicious are the Boxers,
367
00:23:28,824 --> 00:23:32,243
a godless band of rebels who
murder without discretion.
368
00:23:34,037 --> 00:23:35,996
China is not well.
369
00:23:36,081 --> 00:23:38,165
(Murmuring)
370
00:23:38,250 --> 00:23:41,836
I have brought back an envoy who
should give us some insight
371
00:23:41,920 --> 00:23:45,297
into the inscrutable
mind of the Chinese.
372
00:23:45,674 --> 00:23:46,882
(Growling)
373
00:23:46,883 --> 00:23:48,342
(Murmuring)
374
00:23:49,010 --> 00:23:50,094
Is he mad?
375
00:23:51,638 --> 00:23:54,348
Given to Her Majesty Queen
Victoria by the emperor
376
00:23:54,433 --> 00:23:58,185
in recognition of her 50
glorious years on the throne.
377
00:23:58,270 --> 00:23:59,687
(Growling)
378
00:24:00,647 --> 00:24:01,730
Outrageousness!
379
00:24:03,191 --> 00:24:04,817
Long live the Queen.
380
00:24:04,901 --> 00:24:06,485
(Growling)
381
00:24:08,822 --> 00:24:11,365
(Upbeat Country Music Plays)
382
00:24:15,871 --> 00:24:18,747
(Singing) England swings
like a pendulum do.
383
00:24:18,832 --> 00:24:21,959
Bobbies on bicycles
two by two.
384
00:24:22,043 --> 00:24:25,421
Westminster Abbey the
tower of Big Ben.
385
00:24:25,505 --> 00:24:27,882
The rosy red cheeks of
the little children.
386
00:24:27,966 --> 00:24:30,468
BOY: Jack the Ripper
strikes again!
387
00:24:30,552 --> 00:24:31,719
Extra! Extra!
388
00:24:31,803 --> 00:24:33,596
Read all about it.
389
00:24:33,597 --> 00:24:35,139
Howdy, partner.
390
00:24:36,391 --> 00:24:38,267
The English are not
very friendly.
391
00:24:38,351 --> 00:24:40,352
They're just sore losers.
392
00:24:40,770 --> 00:24:42,396
What did they lose?
393
00:24:42,397 --> 00:24:45,483
A little thing called the
American Revolution, Chon.
394
00:24:45,901 --> 00:24:47,109
Never heard of it.
395
00:24:47,194 --> 00:24:48,652
I'll give you the highlights.
396
00:24:48,737 --> 00:24:50,298
They came over with
about a million men.
397
00:24:50,363 --> 00:24:52,072
We had a bunch of
farmers with pitchforks
398
00:24:52,157 --> 00:24:54,283
and beat 'em like a drum.
399
00:24:54,284 --> 00:24:55,451
BOY: Extra! Extra!
400
00:24:55,619 --> 00:24:56,619
Hey!
401
00:24:57,829 --> 00:24:59,705
Hey! I'm walking here!
402
00:24:59,831 --> 00:25:02,833
You're driving on the
wrong side of the road!
403
00:25:03,335 --> 00:25:06,462
Bunch of amateurs. These
people don't get it.
404
00:25:07,005 --> 00:25:08,506
Hello, ladies.
405
00:25:08,924 --> 00:25:10,382
(Giggling)
406
00:25:12,427 --> 00:25:13,636
Look at you.
407
00:25:13,637 --> 00:25:16,305
What, I'm not supposed
to notice a pretty lady?
408
00:25:16,306 --> 00:25:18,599
I thought you wanted to settle
down and have a family.
409
00:25:18,683 --> 00:25:21,602
I do, Chon. I just hope I can.
410
00:25:21,937 --> 00:25:23,020
Why not?
411
00:25:23,104 --> 00:25:24,104
Sometimes I worry
412
00:25:24,189 --> 00:25:26,315
that all the damn
horseback riding
413
00:25:26,399 --> 00:25:28,108
I did out in the west,
414
00:25:28,109 --> 00:25:30,194
bouncing up and down
on the hard saddles,
415
00:25:30,278 --> 00:25:33,948
might have made it so my
salmon don't swim upstream
416
00:25:34,032 --> 00:25:35,324
the way they're supposed to.
417
00:25:36,785 --> 00:25:37,826
What?
418
00:25:37,911 --> 00:25:39,703
I might be shooting blanks.
419
00:25:40,956 --> 00:25:41,956
Oh.
420
00:25:42,707 --> 00:25:44,124
Don't say anything.
421
00:25:45,377 --> 00:25:47,878
Roy, it's okay.
422
00:25:48,255 --> 00:25:50,756
Some people are not
meant to have a family.
423
00:25:51,049 --> 00:25:53,842
I've always had such a special
connection with children.
424
00:25:53,927 --> 00:25:55,344
The little ankle-biters...
425
00:25:55,428 --> 00:25:57,388
Hey! Watch it, you little punk!
426
00:25:57,472 --> 00:25:58,973
Pardon me, guv.
427
00:26:03,270 --> 00:26:04,937
You gents lost your way?
428
00:26:05,230 --> 00:26:07,523
Yeah, we're looking
for my sister.
429
00:26:07,607 --> 00:26:10,484
She's staying at
32 Oxford Street.
430
00:26:10,485 --> 00:26:13,487
I know it well, guv. Me old
man used to live there.
431
00:26:14,447 --> 00:26:15,573
Can you show us the way?
432
00:26:16,783 --> 00:26:19,493
Memory's a little dodgy,
433
00:26:20,996 --> 00:26:23,205
but I'm sure for a Bob
I could get you there.
434
00:26:23,290 --> 00:26:26,208
What do you take us for?
Okies from Muskogee?
435
00:26:26,209 --> 00:26:29,169
Go sell your bullshit someplace else.
We're not buying it.
436
00:26:30,547 --> 00:26:32,172
Thanks for the tip, guv.
437
00:26:32,173 --> 00:26:34,258
Hey! I stole that
watch from my Uncle!
438
00:26:34,342 --> 00:26:35,426
What?
439
00:26:35,510 --> 00:26:37,344
(Upbeat Music Plays)
440
00:26:38,305 --> 00:26:40,389
(Singing) Aah.
441
00:26:43,810 --> 00:26:45,853
Who-o-o-a
442
00:26:51,985 --> 00:26:53,027
(Braying)
443
00:26:53,028 --> 00:26:54,028
(Clucking)
444
00:26:55,864 --> 00:26:56,947
This way.
445
00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:03,287
Come here, you little
rubbish-eater!
446
00:27:03,371 --> 00:27:06,415
What did I tell you about
poaching on our turf, Charlie?
447
00:27:06,416 --> 00:27:08,542
I'm on the straight and narrow.
Honest.
448
00:27:10,879 --> 00:27:11,879
(Sighs)
449
00:27:13,548 --> 00:27:15,382
Oh, what's this, then?
450
00:27:16,009 --> 00:27:17,593
After I'm through beating you,
451
00:27:17,594 --> 00:27:20,554
you're gonna wish you never
ran away from the workhouse!
452
00:27:20,555 --> 00:27:22,056
WANG: Leave the boy alone.
453
00:27:23,224 --> 00:27:24,558
Bloody tourists!
454
00:27:24,559 --> 00:27:26,143
Get your noses out of it!
455
00:27:26,227 --> 00:27:28,103
Do whatever you want to the kid,
456
00:27:28,104 --> 00:27:29,730
but that's my watch
you're holding.
457
00:27:29,731 --> 00:27:33,942
There's a load of us
and only two of you.
458
00:27:34,361 --> 00:27:35,736
So piss off!
459
00:27:36,196 --> 00:27:38,614
Easy, fellas. You've
lost one war this way.
460
00:27:38,615 --> 00:27:40,282
Don't make the same
mistake twice.
461
00:27:40,283 --> 00:27:41,283
Hah!
462
00:27:41,368 --> 00:27:42,368
Ugh!
463
00:27:47,374 --> 00:27:48,874
(Grunting)
464
00:27:51,461 --> 00:27:52,544
(Whistles)
465
00:27:53,129 --> 00:27:54,213
(Whistles)
466
00:27:56,549 --> 00:27:58,300
Come on! After him!
467
00:28:04,599 --> 00:28:05,766
Hey!
468
00:28:11,564 --> 00:28:12,940
MAN: There he is! Get him!
469
00:28:13,024 --> 00:28:14,817
We've got him now. Come on.
Move in, lads.
470
00:28:14,901 --> 00:28:16,527
Come on, move in.
471
00:28:21,032 --> 00:28:22,449
(Indistinct Shouting)
472
00:28:26,329 --> 00:28:27,329
Aah!
473
00:28:27,997 --> 00:28:29,123
Ha ha ha!
474
00:28:33,461 --> 00:28:34,712
Aah!
475
00:28:38,883 --> 00:28:40,175
Wait, wait!
476
00:28:40,260 --> 00:28:41,593
Ohh! Wait!
477
00:28:51,104 --> 00:28:52,479
Come on! Get him!
478
00:28:52,480 --> 00:28:53,981
Up the bloody ladder!
479
00:28:53,982 --> 00:28:55,232
Come on!
480
00:29:02,323 --> 00:29:03,323
Aah!
481
00:29:07,328 --> 00:29:08,537
Aaah!
482
00:29:15,336 --> 00:29:16,336
(Gasps)
483
00:29:16,421 --> 00:29:17,671
Aah! Ugh!
484
00:29:21,801 --> 00:29:23,177
Aaaaah!
485
00:29:23,261 --> 00:29:24,678
(Crash)
486
00:29:24,679 --> 00:29:26,722
Hey! Hey!
487
00:29:28,767 --> 00:29:29,892
WOMAN: Oh! Watch it!
488
00:29:32,353 --> 00:29:34,563
Ugh! Ugh! Ugh!
489
00:29:34,564 --> 00:29:35,564
Ugh!
490
00:29:37,233 --> 00:29:38,233
Hey.
491
00:29:40,236 --> 00:29:41,904
Ohh! Aah!
492
00:29:41,988 --> 00:29:43,906
(Indistinct Shouting)
493
00:29:51,873 --> 00:29:53,207
(Grunting)
494
00:30:00,089 --> 00:30:01,924
Aaah!
495
00:30:02,008 --> 00:30:03,008
Ohh!
496
00:30:05,136 --> 00:30:06,678
Come here, you!
497
00:30:38,503 --> 00:30:39,586
Cool.
498
00:30:57,981 --> 00:30:59,273
Come on!
499
00:30:59,399 --> 00:31:00,607
Move it!
500
00:31:05,864 --> 00:31:07,698
(Upbeat Music Plays)
501
00:31:07,782 --> 00:31:08,991
Come on!
502
00:31:13,746 --> 00:31:15,873
(Singing) Do, do, do, do.
503
00:31:15,957 --> 00:31:17,791
Do, do, Dee, do.
504
00:31:17,792 --> 00:31:19,501
Do, do, do, do.
505
00:31:19,502 --> 00:31:21,211
Do, do, Dee, do.
506
00:31:21,296 --> 00:31:22,838
Do, do, do, do.
507
00:31:22,922 --> 00:31:25,299
Do, do, Dee, do.
508
00:31:29,220 --> 00:31:30,220
Aah!
509
00:31:39,355 --> 00:31:40,355
You!
510
00:31:45,194 --> 00:31:46,486
(Grunting)
511
00:31:50,533 --> 00:31:51,533
Aah!
512
00:31:54,495 --> 00:31:56,121
Did you see that?
513
00:31:56,623 --> 00:31:57,831
It's okay.
514
00:31:57,832 --> 00:31:59,041
Okay?
515
00:31:59,042 --> 00:32:00,709
I call that one my
kung pao chicken.
516
00:32:00,710 --> 00:32:02,502
I clotheslined the sucker.
517
00:32:02,503 --> 00:32:04,212
(Whistle Blows)
518
00:32:04,297 --> 00:32:05,422
Come on, get back!
519
00:32:05,506 --> 00:32:06,673
Clear away!
520
00:32:06,758 --> 00:32:07,841
Come on!
521
00:32:07,842 --> 00:32:09,134
Make way!
522
00:32:15,975 --> 00:32:17,392
(Groaning)
523
00:32:21,648 --> 00:32:25,317
I think you gentlemen should
accompany me back to the Yard.
524
00:32:26,110 --> 00:32:28,362
This isn't a yard! It's a jail!
525
00:32:28,446 --> 00:32:29,780
Roy, calm down.
526
00:32:31,866 --> 00:32:33,033
Unbelievable.
527
00:32:33,368 --> 00:32:34,368
(Sighs)
528
00:32:34,452 --> 00:32:36,119
(Footsteps)
529
00:32:36,329 --> 00:32:37,537
Wait, someone's coming!
530
00:32:37,622 --> 00:32:39,915
- Let me handle this.
- I'm gonna handle it, okay?
531
00:32:39,916 --> 00:32:41,541
The English aren't like you.
532
00:32:41,542 --> 00:32:43,418
They don't get all
emotional touchy-feely.
533
00:32:43,503 --> 00:32:44,628
Do me a favor.
534
00:32:44,712 --> 00:32:47,089
Park the kung fu. Let
me do the talking.
535
00:32:47,215 --> 00:32:48,298
(Cell Door Opens)
536
00:32:49,550 --> 00:32:52,219
Come here! Let me
give you a hug.
537
00:32:52,470 --> 00:32:53,553
Ooh!
538
00:32:53,638 --> 00:32:54,721
Ha ha!
539
00:32:55,223 --> 00:32:58,392
I've been after that Fleet
Street gang for two years.
540
00:32:58,393 --> 00:33:00,227
Then you two come along
and bring them down
541
00:33:00,311 --> 00:33:01,728
in a single afternoon.
542
00:33:01,729 --> 00:33:03,897
Brilliant! Now, um...
543
00:33:04,065 --> 00:33:05,399
Oh, that's my watch!
544
00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:07,401
Yes, a street urchin
turned it in.
545
00:33:07,402 --> 00:33:09,277
The little punk better
not have scuffed it.
546
00:33:09,362 --> 00:33:11,238
I do hope your luck picks up.
547
00:33:11,322 --> 00:33:12,447
What do you mean, my luck?
548
00:33:12,448 --> 00:33:13,782
I deduced from your watch
549
00:33:13,866 --> 00:33:15,450
that you'd hit rather
a rough patch.
550
00:33:15,535 --> 00:33:17,244
He has. How do you know?
551
00:33:17,245 --> 00:33:19,997
It's an investigative
technique I've developed.
552
00:33:20,081 --> 00:33:23,250
I can deduce intimate
details about an individual
553
00:33:23,251 --> 00:33:25,460
through a close scrutiny
of their personal effects.
554
00:33:26,838 --> 00:33:27,921
What else can you tell?
555
00:33:30,591 --> 00:33:34,636
The owner of this watch
is a bad gambler
556
00:33:34,637 --> 00:33:36,138
and a lousy shot.
557
00:33:36,389 --> 00:33:38,807
Although he's cheated
death several times,
558
00:33:38,808 --> 00:33:42,144
he spends most of his life
wandering in a rather pathetic
559
00:33:42,228 --> 00:33:45,313
and futile search for
purpose and respect.
560
00:33:46,274 --> 00:33:47,482
Oh, yes.
561
00:33:47,817 --> 00:33:50,652
He has a penchant
for loose women.
562
00:33:52,071 --> 00:33:54,614
Wow! That's amazing.
563
00:33:54,615 --> 00:33:56,825
I'm sure it's a very
popular party trick
564
00:33:56,909 --> 00:33:58,618
at birthdays for small children,
565
00:33:58,619 --> 00:34:01,621
but it doesn't quite play with adults.
(Chuckles)
566
00:34:01,706 --> 00:34:03,123
Just to set the record straight,
567
00:34:03,207 --> 00:34:05,959
Roy O'Bannon is not
attracted to loose women.
568
00:34:05,960 --> 00:34:07,669
Loose women are attracted to me.
569
00:34:07,670 --> 00:34:09,796
- You're Roy O'Bannon?
- Yeah.
570
00:34:09,881 --> 00:34:11,965
The famous Western folk hero?
571
00:34:12,050 --> 00:34:13,216
Have you heard of me?
572
00:34:13,301 --> 00:34:14,676
Have I heard of you?
573
00:34:14,677 --> 00:34:18,013
I've only read Roy O'Bannon vs.
The Mummy five times.
574
00:34:18,097 --> 00:34:19,264
It's fascinating.
575
00:34:19,348 --> 00:34:21,058
I want you to meet
the Shanghai Kid.
576
00:34:21,225 --> 00:34:22,309
Oh, yes.
577
00:34:22,393 --> 00:34:24,853
The faithful Chinese sidekick.
578
00:34:24,937 --> 00:34:28,356
I'm not a sidekick. Those
stories are all lies.
579
00:34:28,441 --> 00:34:30,692
Hey! Come on. Don't be bitter.
580
00:34:31,027 --> 00:34:32,986
I can't help what Sage
McCallister writes.
581
00:34:33,237 --> 00:34:36,364
If there's anything I can
do, I'm at your service.
582
00:34:36,866 --> 00:34:38,283
WANG: We're looking
for my sister.
583
00:34:38,576 --> 00:34:39,910
She's staying at this address.
584
00:34:40,620 --> 00:34:42,496
Can you take us there?
585
00:34:42,997 --> 00:34:44,247
Oh, dear.
586
00:34:44,832 --> 00:34:47,375
I think you'd better
come with me.
587
00:34:52,048 --> 00:34:53,256
(Gasps)
588
00:35:01,349 --> 00:35:02,432
Hey.
589
00:35:05,228 --> 00:35:06,228
Ohh!
590
00:35:13,736 --> 00:35:14,736
Lin.
591
00:35:16,531 --> 00:35:17,614
Wang.
592
00:35:18,449 --> 00:35:19,491
Wang.
593
00:35:23,830 --> 00:35:27,457
Um, if you don't mind,
I'll just wait outside.
594
00:35:29,460 --> 00:35:30,460
(Door Closes)
595
00:35:30,545 --> 00:35:31,586
Introduce me.
596
00:35:31,671 --> 00:35:34,714
Oh, this is Lin, my baby sister.
597
00:35:35,216 --> 00:35:36,216
(Speaking Mandarin)
598
00:35:38,052 --> 00:35:39,136
Roy O'Bannon.
599
00:35:40,888 --> 00:35:41,930
Pleasure.
600
00:35:43,015 --> 00:35:45,642
You never told me your
sister was such a...
601
00:35:45,726 --> 00:35:47,519
Beautiful lotus blossom.
602
00:35:50,565 --> 00:35:53,233
(Speaking Mandarin)
603
00:35:54,402 --> 00:35:55,402
What'd she say?
604
00:35:56,821 --> 00:35:59,406
No, no, no. No talking about
me in your native tongue.
605
00:36:00,700 --> 00:36:01,908
Why are you in jail?
606
00:36:01,993 --> 00:36:03,785
I followed the man
who murdered father.
607
00:36:04,120 --> 00:36:05,162
And?
608
00:36:05,246 --> 00:36:06,913
I found out where he live.
609
00:36:06,914 --> 00:36:09,624
I snuck inside his house
and tried to kill him.
610
00:36:09,709 --> 00:36:11,793
It's my duty to find
Father's killer.
611
00:36:11,794 --> 00:36:14,462
No, it is mine! I'm the
one who promised Father.
612
00:36:14,547 --> 00:36:15,922
But I'm his only son.
613
00:36:16,132 --> 00:36:18,425
When you abandoned
us for America,
614
00:36:18,509 --> 00:36:20,093
Father said he had no son.
615
00:36:20,469 --> 00:36:21,595
What?
616
00:36:22,722 --> 00:36:23,763
(Sighs)
617
00:36:24,015 --> 00:36:25,473
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Time out.
618
00:36:25,474 --> 00:36:27,309
Time out, time out. Come here.
619
00:36:27,310 --> 00:36:28,977
The detective's a fan.
620
00:36:28,978 --> 00:36:30,770
Why don't I play the
celebrity card,
621
00:36:30,771 --> 00:36:32,439
and we'll get her out that way?
622
00:36:32,523 --> 00:36:33,648
Okay?
623
00:36:33,649 --> 00:36:34,900
Come on.
624
00:36:38,029 --> 00:36:40,488
Don't worry. I'll get you out.
625
00:36:45,494 --> 00:36:47,162
Everything's gonna be okay.
626
00:36:47,246 --> 00:36:50,165
In fact, I'm gonna give you
my good-luck playing cards.
627
00:36:52,126 --> 00:36:54,294
Just ignore the naked ladies.
628
00:36:54,295 --> 00:36:55,420
Wang!
629
00:36:57,381 --> 00:36:59,007
Have you opened Father's box?
630
00:37:00,343 --> 00:37:01,593
Not yet.
631
00:37:02,970 --> 00:37:04,304
(Door Hinges Squeak)
632
00:37:04,972 --> 00:37:06,473
(Door Locks)
633
00:37:09,060 --> 00:37:11,728
She tried to assassinate
Lord Rathbone
634
00:37:11,812 --> 00:37:13,980
whilst he was taking
afternoon tea.
635
00:37:14,357 --> 00:37:16,233
He's 1 Oth in line
to the throne,
636
00:37:16,317 --> 00:37:18,401
Her Majesty's favorite cousin,
637
00:37:18,486 --> 00:37:20,445
and the finest
swordsman in England.
638
00:37:23,532 --> 00:37:25,700
So, of course, the
press had a field day.
639
00:37:25,701 --> 00:37:28,870
The story actually knocked Jack
the Ripper off the front page.
640
00:37:28,955 --> 00:37:30,830
Artie, Lin is not a killer.
641
00:37:30,915 --> 00:37:33,041
She's just a really,
really, really
642
00:37:33,125 --> 00:37:35,502
hot, confused Chinese girl.
643
00:37:36,003 --> 00:37:38,588
Maybe if I agree to
sign a few autographs
644
00:37:38,673 --> 00:37:41,841
and talk to some of my
fans here in England,
645
00:37:41,842 --> 00:37:44,594
do some type of charity event,
can we get her out that way?
646
00:37:44,679 --> 00:37:46,596
I'm afraid that's out
of the question.
647
00:37:46,681 --> 00:37:48,098
What will happen to my sister?
648
00:37:48,474 --> 00:37:50,850
She'll go to trial,
probably be locked away
649
00:37:50,851 --> 00:37:53,770
in an institution for
the criminally insane.
650
00:37:54,021 --> 00:37:56,439
The tabloids have already
dubbed her "Loony Lin."
651
00:37:56,524 --> 00:37:58,525
I thought it was rather catchy.
(Chuckles)
652
00:38:00,611 --> 00:38:02,028
At the time.
653
00:38:03,197 --> 00:38:05,323
(Indistinct Conversations)
654
00:38:11,872 --> 00:38:13,498
(Horn Honking)
655
00:38:19,714 --> 00:38:20,922
Do you have any notion
656
00:38:20,923 --> 00:38:23,216
what would happen if we
were to be seen together?
657
00:38:23,301 --> 00:38:26,594
Since your return, I have yet to
lay eyes on the Imperial Seal.
658
00:38:26,846 --> 00:38:30,265
I'm hosting a Jubilee Ball at
my country estate tomorrow.
659
00:38:30,349 --> 00:38:31,725
Be at the stables at midnight.
660
00:38:32,977 --> 00:38:35,854
As requested, a
token of my esteem.
661
00:38:38,774 --> 00:38:39,774
(Chuckles Softly)
662
00:38:44,238 --> 00:38:46,239
This is where you get out.
663
00:38:46,324 --> 00:38:48,074
(Car Door Closes)
664
00:38:49,327 --> 00:38:51,286
I hope there will be
more trust between us
665
00:38:51,287 --> 00:38:54,331
when I'm emperor and
you are the new King.
666
00:38:58,294 --> 00:39:00,879
(Upbeat Pop Music Plays)
667
00:39:03,257 --> 00:39:05,925
ROY: Wow! Buckingham Palace.
Look at that, Chon.
668
00:39:05,926 --> 00:39:08,136
That's where the Queen lives.
669
00:39:09,930 --> 00:39:11,431
Hey, look at this guy.
670
00:39:11,515 --> 00:39:14,142
WANG: He's a royal guard. He
has a very important job.
671
00:39:14,226 --> 00:39:15,977
I used to be just like him.
672
00:39:15,978 --> 00:39:17,299
No, no, they're
nothing like you.
673
00:39:17,355 --> 00:39:18,938
They're more of a
tourist attraction.
674
00:39:19,023 --> 00:39:20,940
You can make faces at
them, insult them,
675
00:39:21,025 --> 00:39:22,275
and they can't move a muscle.
676
00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:23,985
- Here, watch this.
- Roy...
677
00:39:23,986 --> 00:39:25,445
No, no, it's okay.
678
00:39:25,446 --> 00:39:27,822
Hey, buddy, your
shoes are untied.
679
00:39:27,823 --> 00:39:29,324
(Whistling)
680
00:39:30,951 --> 00:39:34,162
That is the biggest damn
beaver I have ever seen.
681
00:39:34,163 --> 00:39:35,497
(Laughs)
682
00:39:35,498 --> 00:39:36,706
Roy, stop it.
683
00:39:36,791 --> 00:39:37,832
The Queen!
684
00:39:37,833 --> 00:39:40,168
Look, the Queen!
She's mooning us!
685
00:39:40,252 --> 00:39:41,544
(Laughs)
686
00:39:41,629 --> 00:39:43,254
He almost went for that.
687
00:39:43,464 --> 00:39:45,465
My friend and I just
came over from America.
688
00:39:45,549 --> 00:39:48,676
You might have heard of it. We
run your jerkwater country.
689
00:39:48,677 --> 00:39:51,471
Come on. You're gonna take
that from a colonial?
690
00:39:51,555 --> 00:39:53,014
Roy, stop it.
691
00:39:53,015 --> 00:39:55,809
I bet you're one hell
of a damn poker player.
692
00:39:55,810 --> 00:39:57,018
No hard feelings.
693
00:39:57,103 --> 00:39:58,103
Huh?
694
00:39:58,479 --> 00:39:59,604
Aah!
695
00:40:00,564 --> 00:40:01,981
(Laughing)
696
00:40:01,982 --> 00:40:03,525
ROY: They can't do that!
697
00:40:03,526 --> 00:40:05,026
They're not allowed to do that!
698
00:40:05,027 --> 00:40:06,236
Shouldn't have touched him.
699
00:40:06,320 --> 00:40:08,321
You scram, you little punk.
700
00:40:08,406 --> 00:40:09,989
I've got friends
at Scotland Yard.
701
00:40:10,074 --> 00:40:11,366
I'll give you up in a heartbeat.
702
00:40:11,367 --> 00:40:12,826
You get your watch back?
703
00:40:12,910 --> 00:40:15,328
Don't worry about my watch.
Go on.
704
00:40:15,454 --> 00:40:16,704
It's a knockoff, you know.
705
00:40:16,705 --> 00:40:18,331
What are you talking about?
A knockoff?
706
00:40:18,332 --> 00:40:21,000
My Uncle stole this watch
from President Lincoln.
707
00:40:21,085 --> 00:40:22,877
It's a priceless
family heirloom.
708
00:40:23,087 --> 00:40:25,046
Not according to the pawnbroker.
709
00:40:25,047 --> 00:40:26,506
You should not steal.
710
00:40:26,590 --> 00:40:28,842
If I don't steal, I don't eat.
711
00:40:28,926 --> 00:40:30,009
By the way,
712
00:40:30,010 --> 00:40:32,846
who showed you how to do all
that kicking and punching?
713
00:40:33,597 --> 00:40:34,681
My father.
714
00:40:34,765 --> 00:40:36,599
Have you ever heard of those?
They're parents.
715
00:40:36,684 --> 00:40:37,892
We have parents that love us.
716
00:40:37,977 --> 00:40:39,727
You don't 'cause you're
a little orphan.
717
00:40:39,812 --> 00:40:41,187
Go on. You're
making us look bad.
718
00:40:41,313 --> 00:40:43,189
You're cramping our style.
719
00:40:43,190 --> 00:40:44,941
(Thunder Rumbles)
720
00:40:45,025 --> 00:40:47,861
Oh, this country blows.
721
00:40:49,071 --> 00:40:51,072
You need a place to stay?
722
00:40:54,994 --> 00:40:56,870
Come on in and warm your dogs.
723
00:40:57,455 --> 00:40:59,539
ROY: (Whistles) You can
get into a lot of trouble
724
00:40:59,623 --> 00:41:01,583
breaking into a place like this.
725
00:41:01,584 --> 00:41:03,710
That being said, well done.
726
00:41:08,883 --> 00:41:10,550
You just ate the last chocolate.
727
00:41:10,551 --> 00:41:11,926
Course I did.
728
00:41:11,927 --> 00:41:13,720
You gotta look out
for number one, kid.
729
00:41:13,804 --> 00:41:14,804
(Sighs)
730
00:41:14,889 --> 00:41:16,431
I could really get used to this,
731
00:41:16,891 --> 00:41:19,100
living the life of a
country gentleman,
732
00:41:19,185 --> 00:41:21,060
maybe doing a little painting,
733
00:41:21,061 --> 00:41:24,105
let Lin play in the
garden with the children,
734
00:41:24,190 --> 00:41:26,232
Vera, Chuck, and Dave.
735
00:41:26,692 --> 00:41:27,734
Who's Lin?
736
00:41:27,818 --> 00:41:31,571
(Sighs) Lin's the most
beautiful woman I've ever met.
737
00:41:32,406 --> 00:41:34,699
She's gonna be the savior
of the house of O'Bannon.
738
00:41:35,493 --> 00:41:37,619
Hey, Chon, check
out the threads.
739
00:41:37,620 --> 00:41:40,788
What do you think? All I'm missing is
the loyal hound curled at my feet.
740
00:41:40,789 --> 00:41:43,082
We're wasting time. We
must find Rathbone.
741
00:41:43,083 --> 00:41:44,250
What do you think
I've been doing,
742
00:41:44,251 --> 00:41:46,419
sitting here, drinking
expensive hooch?
743
00:41:46,420 --> 00:41:47,545
Boy, refill.
744
00:41:48,005 --> 00:41:49,923
I've been working on a plan.
745
00:41:50,132 --> 00:41:53,218
Now... Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Don't slosh the Brandy.
746
00:41:54,136 --> 00:41:55,803
It messes with the bouquet.
747
00:41:55,804 --> 00:41:56,846
Sod off.
748
00:41:56,931 --> 00:41:58,723
Listen, I'm trying to
teach you a skill set,
749
00:41:58,724 --> 00:42:00,475
help get you off the street.
750
00:42:00,476 --> 00:42:01,643
Bartenders make big bucks.
751
00:42:01,644 --> 00:42:02,644
Roy!
752
00:42:02,728 --> 00:42:03,978
The plan.
753
00:42:04,939 --> 00:42:05,939
Thank you, Chon.
754
00:42:06,232 --> 00:42:08,441
Now, I figure, if
we find the Seal,
755
00:42:08,776 --> 00:42:11,402
we can prove Rathbone
killed your Dad.
756
00:42:14,615 --> 00:42:16,491
It's the old Hail Mary play.
757
00:42:16,575 --> 00:42:18,451
I also have a version
where we dig a tunnel.
758
00:42:20,704 --> 00:42:21,704
Hey!
759
00:42:21,872 --> 00:42:23,957
Bloody catapult. Jesus Christ!
760
00:42:23,958 --> 00:42:25,166
You don't need a catapult.
761
00:42:25,167 --> 00:42:26,167
Who asked you?
762
00:42:26,252 --> 00:42:28,336
You don't interrupt grown-ups
when they're talking.
763
00:42:28,337 --> 00:42:31,297
"Lord Nelson Rathbone requests
the pleasure of your company"
764
00:42:31,382 --> 00:42:32,674
"at the Jubilee Ball"
765
00:42:32,758 --> 00:42:36,052
"in honor of Her Majesty's
50th year on the throne."
766
00:42:36,762 --> 00:42:37,804
Sounds good.
767
00:42:37,972 --> 00:42:40,223
Yeah, it doesn't address
the issue of security.
768
00:42:40,307 --> 00:42:43,184
They're not gonna let Chon
and I waltz into the castle.
769
00:42:43,269 --> 00:42:45,645
All you need is a
proper disguise.
770
00:42:47,648 --> 00:42:49,899
I do like a good disguise.
771
00:42:50,651 --> 00:42:52,527
(Chains Rattling)
772
00:43:14,675 --> 00:43:16,009
I look like a fool.
773
00:43:16,093 --> 00:43:17,594
What? You're a maharaja.
774
00:43:17,678 --> 00:43:19,012
That's Indian royalty.
775
00:43:19,096 --> 00:43:20,179
But I'm Chinese.
776
00:43:20,180 --> 00:43:21,514
It's the same thing.
777
00:43:21,849 --> 00:43:23,016
Hey.
778
00:43:23,017 --> 00:43:24,392
Bob your head a little bit,
779
00:43:24,476 --> 00:43:27,186
gives you more of a
India-royalty flavor.
780
00:43:28,147 --> 00:43:30,273
That's good. Good
show, good show.
781
00:43:30,357 --> 00:43:31,608
Good show, good show.
782
00:43:31,692 --> 00:43:33,067
Cheerio, cheerio.
783
00:43:33,152 --> 00:43:34,235
Cheerio, cheerio.
784
00:43:34,361 --> 00:43:35,778
Now what do we do
when we see Rathbone?
785
00:43:35,863 --> 00:43:36,904
Kill him.
786
00:43:36,989 --> 00:43:39,032
No, okay? No!
787
00:43:39,116 --> 00:43:40,199
You're gonna be civil in there
788
00:43:40,284 --> 00:43:41,784
'cause we don't
have the Seal yet.
789
00:43:41,869 --> 00:43:45,872
No seal, no Lin, no
family honor, okay?
790
00:43:46,874 --> 00:43:49,250
Be cool. Okay, we look great.
791
00:43:49,335 --> 00:43:51,210
Let's enjoy this party.
792
00:43:53,964 --> 00:43:55,048
Whoa, whoa. What
are you doing?
793
00:43:55,049 --> 00:43:56,132
I'm going inside.
794
00:43:56,216 --> 00:43:57,467
The say the place is haunted.
795
00:43:57,551 --> 00:44:00,219
No, you're the harness man, which
means you get back at the carriage,
796
00:44:00,220 --> 00:44:02,430
and you wait there in case we
need to make a quick getaway.
797
00:44:02,514 --> 00:44:03,931
Go on, man your post.
798
00:44:04,016 --> 00:44:05,058
You don't always
get what you want.
799
00:44:05,142 --> 00:44:07,560
Why are you so mean to that boy?
800
00:44:08,729 --> 00:44:10,480
I see a lot of
myself in that kid.
801
00:44:10,564 --> 00:44:13,524
It's kind of freaking me out.
Come on.
802
00:44:14,568 --> 00:44:16,069
(Sighs Deeply)
803
00:44:23,243 --> 00:44:24,744
Your name, please, sir.
804
00:44:27,498 --> 00:44:29,999
So I can announce you.
805
00:44:38,926 --> 00:44:41,886
Sherlock Holmes.
806
00:44:42,221 --> 00:44:43,805
Sherlock Holmes.
807
00:44:45,724 --> 00:44:48,518
And which province do you
represent, Your Highness?
808
00:44:52,272 --> 00:44:54,107
Nevada.
809
00:44:59,113 --> 00:45:00,697
(Bells Jingling)
810
00:45:03,283 --> 00:45:04,992
(BAND PLAYING MID-TEMPO MUSIC)
811
00:45:06,120 --> 00:45:08,037
(Indistinct Conversations)
812
00:45:14,253 --> 00:45:18,005
May I present Major
General Sherlock Holmes
813
00:45:18,006 --> 00:45:21,426
and His Highness the
Maharaja of Nevada.
814
00:45:35,274 --> 00:45:38,067
How are the security arrangements
this evening, Inspector?
815
00:45:38,152 --> 00:45:41,362
Oh, everything seems to be
going swimmingly, my lord.
816
00:45:41,363 --> 00:45:43,030
And if I may say so,
817
00:45:43,031 --> 00:45:45,199
it is an honor to guard
your lordship tonight.
818
00:45:45,284 --> 00:45:47,660
I think I speak for all
of us at Scotland Yard
819
00:45:47,745 --> 00:45:50,830
when I say that no matter how
far you are from the throne,
820
00:45:50,914 --> 00:45:53,416
you'll always be number
one in our hearts.
821
00:46:00,007 --> 00:46:01,090
Okay, here's the plan.
822
00:46:01,175 --> 00:46:02,717
We're gonna get a little chow,
823
00:46:02,801 --> 00:46:04,677
then we're gonna
sneak out of here
824
00:46:04,762 --> 00:46:07,013
- and start looking for that seal.
- Okay.
825
00:46:07,181 --> 00:46:09,182
- Spotted dick, sir?
- What?
826
00:46:09,266 --> 00:46:10,725
Spotted dick.
827
00:46:12,352 --> 00:46:13,352
(Scoffs)
828
00:46:13,854 --> 00:46:14,937
Can you believe this guy?
829
00:46:15,022 --> 00:46:17,857
I'm trying to get something to eat,
he's asking me if I got the clap.
830
00:46:17,941 --> 00:46:20,359
I think he's offering you food.
831
00:46:21,945 --> 00:46:25,531
Oh... Spotted dick. Oh,
no, I think I'll pass.
832
00:46:25,532 --> 00:46:27,033
I'm not really a dessert man.
833
00:46:27,117 --> 00:46:30,203
Perhaps my friend might like
some spotted dick. (Laughs)
834
00:46:32,372 --> 00:46:34,207
I might try one of these
sausages, though.
835
00:46:34,291 --> 00:46:36,042
A little smoky Joe.
836
00:46:38,754 --> 00:46:41,088
Mmm, this is good!
837
00:46:41,089 --> 00:46:43,049
I thought the food here
was supposed to suck.
838
00:46:43,133 --> 00:46:45,343
The haggis is fresh
from Scotland, sir.
839
00:46:45,469 --> 00:46:48,095
It's made from the
finest sheeps' bladders.
840
00:46:49,097 --> 00:46:50,640
(Spitting)
841
00:46:52,810 --> 00:46:55,394
I'm gonna get some whiskey
and wash my mouth out.
842
00:47:00,734 --> 00:47:02,360
You should try the quail.
843
00:47:04,947 --> 00:47:06,906
I shot them myself this morning.
844
00:47:07,950 --> 00:47:09,951
How do you do, your lordship?
845
00:47:10,077 --> 00:47:11,869
Very well, thank you.
846
00:47:12,955 --> 00:47:15,915
I'm not acquainted with
the Nevada province.
847
00:47:19,586 --> 00:47:21,963
But I haven't been
to India since '81.
848
00:47:22,047 --> 00:47:24,423
I spent most of my
time in the Orient.
849
00:47:24,716 --> 00:47:27,093
I hear you've just
returned from China.
850
00:47:27,177 --> 00:47:29,512
You are well-informed, Maharaja.
851
00:47:30,556 --> 00:47:32,598
It is my dream that
the Chinese people
852
00:47:32,683 --> 00:47:36,102
will follow India's example and
one day embrace British rule.
853
00:47:36,103 --> 00:47:37,812
The Chinese are very proud.
854
00:47:37,896 --> 00:47:40,940
They place family and
honor above all else.
855
00:47:41,358 --> 00:47:44,610
I'm sure we can
break them of that.
856
00:47:46,530 --> 00:47:47,530
(Chain Jingles)
857
00:47:47,614 --> 00:47:48,781
(Ticking)
858
00:47:49,157 --> 00:47:51,284
If you'll excuse me, I have
a matter to attend to.
859
00:47:51,910 --> 00:47:53,661
Until we meet again.
860
00:47:59,084 --> 00:48:01,919
Patience, patience, I'm
proud of you, Chon.
861
00:48:02,629 --> 00:48:04,463
We must find the Seal.
862
00:48:06,967 --> 00:48:08,134
What do you see?
863
00:48:08,218 --> 00:48:09,218
ROY: Shh, shh, shh!
864
00:48:14,474 --> 00:48:17,226
He just pulled a fancy
dragon key out of his desk.
865
00:48:17,311 --> 00:48:18,811
That was my father's!
866
00:48:18,812 --> 00:48:20,521
I must avenge his honor.
867
00:48:20,522 --> 00:48:22,857
Slow down, tiger. Slow down.
868
00:48:22,858 --> 00:48:25,151
Quit going all Chinese on me.
869
00:48:26,194 --> 00:48:27,945
Chon, Chon, Chon...
870
00:48:29,156 --> 00:48:30,698
Where is he?
871
00:48:30,782 --> 00:48:32,992
Damn it, Chon, remember
your puzzle box, patience.
872
00:48:33,076 --> 00:48:34,327
Patience.
873
00:48:35,370 --> 00:48:36,871
There are no windows.
874
00:48:36,955 --> 00:48:38,706
And we just came in
through the only doorway.
875
00:48:38,707 --> 00:48:40,499
That leaves one explanation.
876
00:48:40,584 --> 00:48:42,209
Remember in Roy O'Bannon vs.
The Mummy
877
00:48:42,294 --> 00:48:43,544
how the zombie King got away
878
00:48:43,629 --> 00:48:45,296
when I chased him into
the pharaoh's tomb?
879
00:48:45,297 --> 00:48:48,049
There's a secret passageway
behind the Sphinx.
880
00:48:48,133 --> 00:48:51,886
Now, there's gotta be a lever
or a button over here.
881
00:48:51,970 --> 00:48:53,095
Help me lift some stuff up.
882
00:48:53,180 --> 00:48:55,181
We're gonna... (Grunts)
883
00:49:07,527 --> 00:49:08,527
Roy!
884
00:49:08,612 --> 00:49:11,572
The painting! It's looking at me.
Look!
885
00:49:11,573 --> 00:49:14,450
Yeah, yeah. Looks like it's looking at me, too.
That's great. That's...
886
00:49:14,534 --> 00:49:16,702
No, real eyes... Moving!
887
00:49:16,870 --> 00:49:19,372
No, Chon, that kid got
to you, didn't he?
888
00:49:19,373 --> 00:49:21,540
Unbelievable! We're not
in a haunted house.
889
00:49:21,625 --> 00:49:23,751
That's a technique
that an artist uses.
890
00:49:23,752 --> 00:49:26,796
"Ubiquitous gaze" or "pursuant
eyes" is the technical term.
891
00:49:27,381 --> 00:49:30,174
It's unnerving though,
I'll give you that.
892
00:49:32,052 --> 00:49:33,427
(Roy Grunts)
893
00:49:34,304 --> 00:49:35,388
Roy...
894
00:49:35,389 --> 00:49:37,390
Now, those eyes... Look!
895
00:49:37,933 --> 00:49:39,642
Whatever you say, Chon.
896
00:49:44,564 --> 00:49:47,191
Let's see what you
got here, Rathbone.
897
00:49:51,238 --> 00:49:52,238
Huh?
898
00:49:52,781 --> 00:49:53,906
Roy!
899
00:49:53,907 --> 00:49:54,991
(Air Hisses)
900
00:49:56,410 --> 00:49:59,036
What, Chon? Are the
statues moving now?
901
00:50:06,712 --> 00:50:07,712
Wow!
902
00:50:12,509 --> 00:50:13,968
(Breathing Heavily)
903
00:50:18,598 --> 00:50:19,682
Oh!
904
00:50:33,363 --> 00:50:34,780
(Muffled Grunting)
905
00:50:35,032 --> 00:50:36,282
Mm-mmm!
906
00:50:36,908 --> 00:50:37,992
Roy!
907
00:50:37,993 --> 00:50:39,326
What?
908
00:50:39,327 --> 00:50:43,039
Damn it, I can't even hear myself
think with you shouting at me, Chon.
909
00:50:44,082 --> 00:50:45,166
Chon?
910
00:50:47,294 --> 00:50:48,377
Chon?
911
00:50:49,171 --> 00:50:50,296
Chon?
912
00:50:51,798 --> 00:50:53,299
This is ridiculous.
913
00:50:53,383 --> 00:50:55,676
Chon, if you wanna act like a
child and play little games,
914
00:50:55,761 --> 00:50:57,219
then find someone else, okay?
915
00:50:57,304 --> 00:50:58,804
'Cause I take this
stuff seriously.
916
00:50:58,805 --> 00:51:01,348
I'm here to work.
I'm on a mission.
917
00:51:01,433 --> 00:51:02,933
(Air Hisses)
918
00:51:03,560 --> 00:51:04,643
Chon?
919
00:51:06,313 --> 00:51:07,646
Okay, Chon.
920
00:51:07,647 --> 00:51:09,982
Okay, you little Chinese otter.
921
00:51:10,609 --> 00:51:11,984
Let's play.
922
00:51:14,196 --> 00:51:15,321
Hah!
923
00:51:26,333 --> 00:51:28,834
Aah! Aah! Chon, demons!
924
00:51:28,835 --> 00:51:30,836
Aah! Aah! Aaah!
925
00:51:30,921 --> 00:51:33,172
Aah! Hyah! Hah!
926
00:51:33,173 --> 00:51:34,757
Aah! Aah!
927
00:51:34,841 --> 00:51:36,425
Hyah! Aah!
928
00:51:43,058 --> 00:51:44,225
Hah! Hah!
929
00:51:47,896 --> 00:51:50,564
She's gonna fight
my battles for me.
930
00:51:50,649 --> 00:51:51,774
LIN: Come on.
931
00:51:52,776 --> 00:51:54,026
Let's go.
932
00:51:54,694 --> 00:51:57,029
What? What are you doing?
933
00:51:57,030 --> 00:51:59,073
That's kinky. I like it.
934
00:51:59,074 --> 00:52:00,074
Unh!
935
00:52:00,158 --> 00:52:01,534
Aah! Aah!
936
00:52:01,618 --> 00:52:03,077
Aah! Aah! Aah!
937
00:52:03,078 --> 00:52:04,078
Unh!
938
00:52:05,038 --> 00:52:06,497
Unh! Unh!
939
00:52:06,873 --> 00:52:09,250
Wow! Look at this.
940
00:52:13,046 --> 00:52:14,463
(Whooshing)
941
00:52:27,519 --> 00:52:28,561
Ooh!
942
00:52:38,280 --> 00:52:39,280
Unh!
943
00:52:39,406 --> 00:52:40,656
Unh!
944
00:52:44,161 --> 00:52:45,244
Aah!
945
00:52:54,588 --> 00:52:56,088
(Squeaking)
946
00:53:18,778 --> 00:53:21,113
Wait, there's something
different about this room.
947
00:53:21,198 --> 00:53:23,365
(Whooshing Continues)
948
00:53:31,791 --> 00:53:32,875
Huh? Oh!
949
00:53:32,959 --> 00:53:34,043
Ooh!
950
00:53:34,419 --> 00:53:35,419
Hey.
951
00:53:35,837 --> 00:53:37,338
Aah! Aah!
952
00:53:38,340 --> 00:53:39,340
Aah!
953
00:53:46,306 --> 00:53:47,806
Don't drop it!
954
00:54:04,407 --> 00:54:05,824
Let's go!
955
00:54:07,369 --> 00:54:08,744
- Wang!
- Chon, for God's sakes.
956
00:54:08,828 --> 00:54:10,663
- Lin.
- Now he shows up.
957
00:54:10,664 --> 00:54:14,083
- I found it.
- Wait, Chon. Do you want to hear?
958
00:54:14,167 --> 00:54:15,751
LIN: The Seal's gone.
959
00:54:23,843 --> 00:54:25,552
(Wind Whistling)
960
00:54:40,443 --> 00:54:42,486
(Whistling Continues)
961
00:54:50,161 --> 00:54:51,203
Lin.
962
00:54:52,747 --> 00:54:53,831
Roy!
963
00:54:54,874 --> 00:54:56,875
ROY: Are we gonna come back?
964
00:54:56,960 --> 00:54:58,210
WANG: Roy!
965
00:54:58,295 --> 00:54:59,295
(Sighs)
966
00:55:07,262 --> 00:55:08,595
(Twig Snaps)
967
00:55:08,596 --> 00:55:10,764
Must you keep doing that?
968
00:55:10,974 --> 00:55:13,892
I was taught not to
be seen or heard.
969
00:55:15,562 --> 00:55:16,562
The Seal.
970
00:55:16,646 --> 00:55:18,397
I am a man of my word.
971
00:55:22,402 --> 00:55:24,820
I remember watching my
brother play with this
972
00:55:24,904 --> 00:55:26,280
like a baby rattle.
973
00:55:28,241 --> 00:55:30,284
When I'd try to touch it,
974
00:55:30,368 --> 00:55:32,453
the dowager empress beat me.
975
00:55:33,913 --> 00:55:35,789
RATHBONE: No doubt your
deprived childhood
976
00:55:35,790 --> 00:55:38,125
made you into the
man you are today.
977
00:55:38,126 --> 00:55:39,126
(Gasps)
978
00:55:39,210 --> 00:55:40,419
Wu Chow.
979
00:55:40,420 --> 00:55:41,628
Wu who?
980
00:55:42,714 --> 00:55:44,506
He's the emperor's
bastard brother.
981
00:55:44,591 --> 00:55:46,800
He was banished from
the Forbidden City
982
00:55:46,885 --> 00:55:48,802
for trying to steal
the Imperial Seal.
983
00:55:48,887 --> 00:55:50,304
Our father caught him.
984
00:55:50,388 --> 00:55:53,098
He vowed to return to claim
the emperor's throne.
985
00:55:54,392 --> 00:55:55,642
This guy?
986
00:55:56,394 --> 00:55:58,604
RATHBONE: I'll assume everything
has been arranged as discussed.
987
00:55:58,605 --> 00:56:01,482
You have nothing to worry about.
It's all in place.
988
00:56:01,608 --> 00:56:04,818
That diamond is as big
as a damn monkey's paw.
989
00:56:04,819 --> 00:56:05,986
Roy...
990
00:56:06,363 --> 00:56:08,655
Don't even think about it.
991
00:56:08,656 --> 00:56:10,866
I'm just admiring the
craftsmanship, Chon.
992
00:56:10,950 --> 00:56:14,119
So for now, our
business is completed.
993
00:56:21,795 --> 00:56:23,253
Where's Lin?
994
00:56:33,264 --> 00:56:34,348
Aah!
995
00:56:34,641 --> 00:56:36,517
Aah! Aah! Oh!
996
00:56:37,477 --> 00:56:38,519
Hey! Hey!
997
00:56:41,314 --> 00:56:42,731
Aah! Aah!
998
00:56:42,816 --> 00:56:43,982
Aah! Gotcha!
999
00:56:46,820 --> 00:56:48,987
Just looking out for number one.
1000
00:56:49,072 --> 00:56:50,072
No!
1001
00:56:50,156 --> 00:56:51,949
The kid got the Seal!
1002
00:56:55,578 --> 00:56:56,912
Unh! Unh!
1003
00:57:09,092 --> 00:57:10,175
ROY: Chon!
1004
00:57:13,012 --> 00:57:14,388
Aah! Aah!
1005
00:57:19,436 --> 00:57:20,811
It's stuck.
1006
00:57:29,904 --> 00:57:30,946
Lin!
1007
00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:36,326
Hurry!
1008
00:57:37,537 --> 00:57:38,704
(Grunting)
1009
00:57:43,209 --> 00:57:45,544
Go! You can do it!
1010
00:57:45,545 --> 00:57:47,254
ROY: She's got it.
1011
00:57:47,338 --> 00:57:48,630
She's got it.
1012
00:57:48,715 --> 00:57:50,048
She's got it!
1013
00:57:50,049 --> 00:57:51,133
Roy!
1014
00:57:51,342 --> 00:57:52,551
Come on!
1015
00:57:52,886 --> 00:57:55,053
Chon, what in our
history together
1016
00:57:55,138 --> 00:57:57,556
makes you think I'm capable
of something like that?
1017
00:57:57,557 --> 00:57:59,099
- Roy!
- I can't do that!
1018
00:57:59,184 --> 00:58:01,894
- Hurry up!
- (Sighs) Wait...
1019
00:58:02,645 --> 00:58:03,937
There's a better way.
1020
00:58:04,105 --> 00:58:06,064
ROY: Yee-haw!
1021
00:58:06,816 --> 00:58:09,276
(Singing) Every day
I get in the queue.
1022
00:58:09,277 --> 00:58:11,612
Too much, magic bus.
1023
00:58:11,696 --> 00:58:14,156
To get on the bus
that takes me to you.
1024
00:58:14,449 --> 00:58:15,616
Slow down!
1025
00:58:15,700 --> 00:58:17,075
I'm a bat out of hell!
1026
00:58:17,243 --> 00:58:18,577
Yee-haw!
1027
00:58:19,078 --> 00:58:20,746
Besides, I don't know
where the brake is.
1028
00:58:20,747 --> 00:58:21,747
What?
1029
00:58:25,084 --> 00:58:26,126
Look out!
1030
00:58:26,211 --> 00:58:27,753
Aah!
1031
00:58:27,837 --> 00:58:29,505
(Both Screaming)
1032
00:58:29,589 --> 00:58:32,674
Magic bus, magic bus, magic bus.
1033
00:58:32,759 --> 00:58:36,303
Magic bus, magic bus, magic bus.
1034
00:58:36,888 --> 00:58:38,263
Magic bus.
1035
00:58:41,434 --> 00:58:44,478
Now I've got my magic bus
1036
00:58:44,479 --> 00:58:46,939
(Screaming Continues)
1037
00:58:46,940 --> 00:58:49,650
Now I've got my magic bus.
1038
00:58:49,651 --> 00:58:50,776
So, what now, buddy?
1039
00:58:50,860 --> 00:58:53,737
Relax, relax. Smooth
sailing from here.
1040
00:58:54,614 --> 00:58:56,365
Too much, magic bus.
1041
00:58:57,992 --> 00:58:59,117
BOTH: Aaah!
1042
00:58:59,118 --> 00:59:00,327
(Crash, Glass Breaking)
1043
00:59:03,206 --> 00:59:05,999
Yes, these are the
men who attacked me.
1044
00:59:06,709 --> 00:59:10,837
I'm afraid the assailants have
temporarily eluded us, my lord.
1045
00:59:10,922 --> 00:59:15,717
Perhaps you could explain to me
how Loony Lin managed to escape
1046
00:59:15,802 --> 00:59:18,470
from the confines of Scotland
Yard under the watch
1047
00:59:18,555 --> 00:59:22,849
of the most respected
police force in the world.
1048
00:59:23,184 --> 00:59:26,144
Yes, of course, it's
absolutely fascinating.
1049
00:59:26,229 --> 00:59:28,355
Um, she picked the lock
1050
00:59:28,439 --> 00:59:31,817
using a deck of rather
risqué playing cards.
1051
00:59:32,110 --> 00:59:36,363
Then scaled the walls
with a mop, a fork,
1052
00:59:36,447 --> 00:59:38,699
and various pilfered
undergarments.
1053
00:59:38,825 --> 00:59:40,409
You've gotta hand
it to the Chinese,
1054
00:59:40,493 --> 00:59:43,120
they are an awfully
ingenious lot, aren't they?
1055
00:59:44,372 --> 00:59:46,832
Does your incompetence
know no bounds?
1056
00:59:48,835 --> 00:59:49,835
(Sighs)
1057
00:59:51,838 --> 00:59:54,047
(Trippy Rock Music Playing)
1058
00:59:59,679 --> 01:00:03,307
(Singing) It's the
time of the season.
1059
01:00:04,851 --> 01:00:07,477
When the love runs high.
1060
01:00:07,895 --> 01:00:11,523
In this time, give
it to me easy.
1061
01:00:13,026 --> 01:00:16,153
And let me try with
pleasured hands.
1062
01:00:16,237 --> 01:00:17,863
Where am I?
1063
01:00:19,324 --> 01:00:20,407
Lin!
1064
01:00:22,243 --> 01:00:23,443
I don't even know these women.
1065
01:00:24,037 --> 01:00:27,039
It's the time of the season.
1066
01:00:27,040 --> 01:00:29,041
Lin, what are you doing here?
1067
01:00:29,042 --> 01:00:30,876
For loving.
1068
01:00:30,877 --> 01:00:32,169
Oh, Lord.
1069
01:00:32,712 --> 01:00:35,505
You want to try the
position on page 37?
1070
01:00:40,803 --> 01:00:42,846
Come here, you little minx.
1071
01:00:43,556 --> 01:00:44,556
(Bleats)
1072
01:00:45,600 --> 01:00:46,725
What?
1073
01:00:48,478 --> 01:00:52,773
It's the time of the season.
1074
01:00:52,857 --> 01:00:53,899
For loving.
1075
01:00:53,983 --> 01:00:56,234
Aaah!
1076
01:00:56,235 --> 01:00:57,235
(Painfully) Oh!
1077
01:00:58,321 --> 01:00:59,404
Oh!
1078
01:00:59,405 --> 01:01:01,156
- You okay?
- No, I'm not okay.
1079
01:01:01,240 --> 01:01:03,700
I've just been violated
by a barnyard animal.
1080
01:01:05,578 --> 01:01:06,578
Unh!
1081
01:01:06,663 --> 01:01:08,288
(Sheep Bleating)
1082
01:01:08,373 --> 01:01:11,792
Who would leave a pile of stones
in the middle of the field?
1083
01:01:11,876 --> 01:01:14,586
I don't know, Chon.
These people are nuts.
1084
01:01:16,297 --> 01:01:17,547
Come on.
1085
01:01:21,636 --> 01:01:23,970
ROY: Can I tell you something?
WANG: What?
1086
01:01:25,264 --> 01:01:27,599
ROY: This is a hell of a
damn adventure we're on,
1087
01:01:27,684 --> 01:01:29,726
and I'm having an
absolute ball with you.
1088
01:01:32,480 --> 01:01:33,689
Me, too.
1089
01:01:37,193 --> 01:01:38,360
(Horse Whinnies)
1090
01:01:38,444 --> 01:01:40,612
Here we go, here we go.
1091
01:01:40,697 --> 01:01:42,531
Get your thumb out, Maharaja.
1092
01:01:42,615 --> 01:01:44,116
Get over here.
1093
01:01:44,826 --> 01:01:46,159
Excuse me!
1094
01:01:48,454 --> 01:01:49,705
- Lin!
- Lin!
1095
01:01:51,499 --> 01:01:53,208
(Horse Whinnies)
1096
01:01:57,797 --> 01:02:00,632
My shoulder's getting
a little tight. Aah!
1097
01:02:01,592 --> 01:02:04,511
This is your first time
in England, isn't it?
1098
01:02:05,138 --> 01:02:08,473
How do you know your way around?
It's incredible.
1099
01:02:08,474 --> 01:02:10,517
I always had a good
sense of direction.
1100
01:02:10,518 --> 01:02:12,477
Oh, you can say that again.
1101
01:02:12,562 --> 01:02:15,689
I wish we could say the
same about you-know-who.
1102
01:02:15,982 --> 01:02:17,566
I once sent him over
a Mountain range.
1103
01:02:17,650 --> 01:02:18,942
He was lost forever.
1104
01:02:19,110 --> 01:02:20,193
(Chuckles)
1105
01:02:20,278 --> 01:02:23,196
One time, I sent him
over the Great Wall.
1106
01:02:23,197 --> 01:02:24,698
He was lost for three days.
1107
01:02:24,699 --> 01:02:26,533
Three days? Nunh-unh.
1108
01:02:26,534 --> 01:02:27,868
(Laughs)
1109
01:02:28,661 --> 01:02:30,954
Oh, gosh, we got
a lot in common.
1110
01:02:31,330 --> 01:02:33,498
I've never met anybody
like you, Roy.
1111
01:02:33,583 --> 01:02:34,708
Really?
1112
01:02:34,709 --> 01:02:35,834
Yeah.
1113
01:02:36,419 --> 01:02:40,172
Hey, can I tell you something
without you getting offended?
1114
01:02:40,256 --> 01:02:41,339
What?
1115
01:02:41,674 --> 01:02:44,384
You have a great body.
1116
01:02:44,469 --> 01:02:45,510
(Laughs)
1117
01:02:45,511 --> 01:02:47,429
There! I said it!
It's out in the open.
1118
01:02:47,513 --> 01:02:48,805
(Laughs)
1119
01:02:50,141 --> 01:02:51,391
You must work out.
1120
01:02:51,476 --> 01:02:52,726
(Giggling) Me?
1121
01:02:52,810 --> 01:02:54,144
Excuse me.
1122
01:02:55,021 --> 01:02:56,021
I...
1123
01:02:56,105 --> 01:02:58,106
Chon, what are you doing?
1124
01:02:58,524 --> 01:02:59,691
I don't like the backseat.
1125
01:02:59,776 --> 01:03:01,026
What?
1126
01:03:01,110 --> 01:03:04,029
Makes me sick... Dizzy.
1127
01:03:10,828 --> 01:03:12,329
ROY: Whitechapel...
1128
01:03:13,372 --> 01:03:15,624
This looks like a nice
enough neighborhood.
1129
01:03:15,708 --> 01:03:17,042
(Indistinct Conversations)
1130
01:03:18,795 --> 01:03:20,420
What is Puss 'n' Boots?
1131
01:03:20,421 --> 01:03:21,713
It's a boardinghouse.
1132
01:03:21,798 --> 01:03:24,716
Some of the sailors on the ship
coming over recommended it.
1133
01:03:25,051 --> 01:03:27,177
(Indistinct Conversations)
1134
01:03:29,222 --> 01:03:31,056
Come on. Come on!
1135
01:03:40,107 --> 01:03:41,775
I won't let my sister stay here.
1136
01:03:41,776 --> 01:03:43,944
What are we supposed to do?
Check in to The Savoy?
1137
01:03:43,945 --> 01:03:45,737
We'll get arrested before
we get to our room.
1138
01:03:45,822 --> 01:03:47,781
I don't mind this place.
1139
01:03:51,744 --> 01:03:54,037
See? A little open-minded.
1140
01:03:54,956 --> 01:03:56,081
(Chuckles)
1141
01:03:56,165 --> 01:03:58,917
I know it sounds crazy
'cause I just met her,
1142
01:03:58,918 --> 01:04:00,752
but I think I'm falling for her.
1143
01:04:00,837 --> 01:04:02,087
I think she's the one.
1144
01:04:02,213 --> 01:04:03,964
Roy, she's my baby sister.
1145
01:04:04,048 --> 01:04:07,467
I know she is. Thank God! That's
the only chance I've got.
1146
01:04:07,468 --> 01:04:09,469
Look, I'm getting ready
to launch a little thing
1147
01:04:09,554 --> 01:04:11,304
called, "Operation Sweep
Her Off Her Feet."
1148
01:04:11,597 --> 01:04:13,640
You're in a position
to talk me up.
1149
01:04:13,641 --> 01:04:14,933
Can I count on you?
1150
01:04:14,934 --> 01:04:17,102
Please, buddy, I've never
asked you for anything.
1151
01:04:17,186 --> 01:04:19,437
Sure, Roy, I'll
tell her the truth.
1152
01:04:19,522 --> 01:04:20,772
Don't get hung up on the truth.
1153
01:04:20,857 --> 01:04:23,441
Feel free to smooth out
your old pal's rough edges.
1154
01:04:24,735 --> 01:04:25,819
(Sighs Deeply)
1155
01:04:25,903 --> 01:04:27,279
I love you, buddy.
1156
01:04:27,780 --> 01:04:29,614
(Piano Plays In Distance)
1157
01:04:29,699 --> 01:04:31,283
(Door Hinges Squeak)
1158
01:04:31,367 --> 01:04:33,702
Lin, come.
1159
01:04:37,456 --> 01:04:38,790
(Grunts Softly)
1160
01:04:39,458 --> 01:04:40,500
WANG: Sit.
1161
01:04:40,626 --> 01:04:42,794
(Conversations Continue)
1162
01:04:44,672 --> 01:04:45,964
(Door Hinges Squeak)
1163
01:04:54,974 --> 01:04:56,349
(Knock On Door)
1164
01:05:03,232 --> 01:05:04,232
(Sighs)
1165
01:05:05,985 --> 01:05:07,402
Hello, love.
1166
01:05:07,486 --> 01:05:08,653
Fancy a tumble?
1167
01:05:08,738 --> 01:05:09,988
Oh!
1168
01:05:10,615 --> 01:05:14,075
Where were you two days ago? I
would have bedded you in a second.
1169
01:05:14,160 --> 01:05:16,494
Now you're looking
at a changed man.
1170
01:05:16,495 --> 01:05:18,997
I'm sort of saving myself
for someone special.
1171
01:05:18,998 --> 01:05:20,916
I'll give you a discount.
1172
01:05:22,001 --> 01:05:24,961
That's the most romantic thing
any woman's ever said to me.
1173
01:05:26,797 --> 01:05:28,465
Oh! You better go.
1174
01:05:28,799 --> 01:05:30,842
You better go before
we lose control. Go!
1175
01:05:31,510 --> 01:05:33,219
If you change your mind...
1176
01:05:33,220 --> 01:05:34,304
Roy!
1177
01:05:41,604 --> 01:05:42,729
WANG: Lin...
1178
01:05:43,064 --> 01:05:46,066
Our father would talk about
the right man for you.
1179
01:05:46,150 --> 01:05:47,400
He must be strong...
1180
01:05:47,610 --> 01:05:48,860
All right.
1181
01:05:49,195 --> 01:05:51,363
...courageous, and
a good father.
1182
01:05:51,822 --> 01:05:53,031
Like Roy.
1183
01:05:53,032 --> 01:05:54,199
We got her, Chon.
1184
01:05:54,200 --> 01:05:55,700
Not like Roy.
1185
01:05:56,452 --> 01:05:57,869
You don't know him like I do.
1186
01:05:58,245 --> 01:06:00,163
He has many bad habits.
1187
01:06:00,873 --> 01:06:02,123
Such as?
1188
01:06:02,208 --> 01:06:05,919
He drinks, smokes
and he gambles.
1189
01:06:06,003 --> 01:06:07,587
Chon, where are you
going with this?
1190
01:06:07,713 --> 01:06:09,547
He sleeps with women for money.
1191
01:06:09,632 --> 01:06:10,882
What are you...
1192
01:06:10,967 --> 01:06:13,385
Roy don't do that. I
can see inside him.
1193
01:06:13,469 --> 01:06:14,928
(Sighs)
1194
01:06:14,929 --> 01:06:16,429
He has a good heart.
1195
01:06:16,430 --> 01:06:17,597
That's right.
1196
01:06:17,682 --> 01:06:20,225
His salmon don't swim upstream.
1197
01:06:20,226 --> 01:06:21,226
Huh?
1198
01:06:21,310 --> 01:06:22,394
He shoots blanks.
1199
01:06:22,478 --> 01:06:23,728
Aah! Aah!
1200
01:06:24,563 --> 01:06:26,272
Lin, he cannot be trusted.
1201
01:06:26,273 --> 01:06:28,233
How could you say that?
1202
01:06:28,234 --> 01:06:29,776
You're his friend.
1203
01:06:29,860 --> 01:06:31,987
Yeah, sort of.
1204
01:06:32,405 --> 01:06:34,280
Roy is the type of a friend
1205
01:06:34,281 --> 01:06:36,241
you never introduce
to your other friends
1206
01:06:36,242 --> 01:06:37,951
or bring home to your family.
1207
01:06:38,035 --> 01:06:39,494
He never speak the truth.
1208
01:06:39,578 --> 01:06:40,829
You know what I call him?
1209
01:06:40,913 --> 01:06:43,748
Not Roy O'Bannon, Roy O'Baloney.
1210
01:06:45,418 --> 01:06:46,876
I don't care.
1211
01:06:47,128 --> 01:06:49,212
Lin, I forbid it.
1212
01:06:50,589 --> 01:06:52,465
You are not my father.
1213
01:06:54,093 --> 01:06:55,093
(Door Opens)
1214
01:06:55,177 --> 01:06:56,261
(Sighs)
1215
01:06:56,262 --> 01:06:58,263
(Melancholy Music Playing)
1216
01:07:02,560 --> 01:07:04,436
Roy, there you are.
1217
01:07:05,438 --> 01:07:06,771
Hi.
1218
01:07:07,273 --> 01:07:08,440
Mm-hmm.
1219
01:07:09,233 --> 01:07:11,526
You need anything, buddy?
1220
01:07:11,610 --> 01:07:13,820
A whole lot of leave-me-alone.
1221
01:07:16,699 --> 01:07:18,033
What's wrong?
1222
01:07:20,494 --> 01:07:23,496
Nothing. I guess I just woke
up on wrong side of the bed.
1223
01:07:23,497 --> 01:07:26,541
I feel a little pain in my back
like someone put a knife there.
1224
01:07:26,625 --> 01:07:27,876
I'm okay.
1225
01:07:28,419 --> 01:07:30,211
Don't worry about me.
1226
01:07:30,713 --> 01:07:34,340
(Singing) Yes, it's the
saddest experience.
1227
01:07:34,508 --> 01:07:36,760
You'll ever know.
1228
01:07:37,636 --> 01:07:39,471
Because one is the
loneliest number.
1229
01:07:39,555 --> 01:07:40,638
WANG: Roy!
1230
01:07:46,145 --> 01:07:47,395
Ta-da!
1231
01:07:47,855 --> 01:07:49,689
That actually reminds
me of a trick.
1232
01:07:49,690 --> 01:07:51,649
- You ever seen this one?
- Ooh!
1233
01:07:51,734 --> 01:07:52,984
Or this one? Aah!
1234
01:07:52,985 --> 01:07:53,985
Ooh!
1235
01:07:54,070 --> 01:07:55,361
You think you're so cool
1236
01:07:55,362 --> 01:07:59,074
with your karate and
your childlike reflexes.
1237
01:07:59,325 --> 01:08:00,408
Aaaah!
1238
01:08:00,493 --> 01:08:01,493
Oh!
1239
01:08:01,744 --> 01:08:03,244
Roy, you okay?
1240
01:08:04,330 --> 01:08:06,081
Look at you. (Chuckles)
1241
01:08:06,749 --> 01:08:08,958
Do you really call
me "Roy Baloney"?
1242
01:08:12,505 --> 01:08:13,880
Roy, you don't understand.
1243
01:08:13,881 --> 01:08:16,174
You just smashed my puzzle box.
1244
01:08:17,968 --> 01:08:20,011
I'll never figure
out my message.
1245
01:08:20,012 --> 01:08:21,513
- Roy...
- Go.
1246
01:08:23,766 --> 01:08:25,433
You're dead to me.
1247
01:08:25,935 --> 01:08:27,936
I don't know a Chon Wang.
1248
01:08:31,232 --> 01:08:32,232
(Sighs)
1249
01:08:42,034 --> 01:08:43,076
What...
1250
01:08:43,160 --> 01:08:44,911
ALL: Hi, Roy.
1251
01:08:46,455 --> 01:08:48,206
Who loves you, baby?
1252
01:08:48,290 --> 01:08:49,374
Nice try, Chon.
1253
01:08:49,375 --> 01:08:50,542
Roy...
1254
01:08:51,043 --> 01:08:52,377
I'm sorry.
1255
01:08:58,092 --> 01:09:00,802
You do that again and
you're a dead man.
1256
01:09:05,808 --> 01:09:07,100
(Sighs Deeply)
1257
01:09:11,564 --> 01:09:12,772
Pillow fight!
1258
01:09:12,857 --> 01:09:15,233
(Singing) Every evening, when
all my day's work is through
1259
01:09:15,317 --> 01:09:17,569
I call my baby and ask
her, "What shall we do?"
1260
01:09:17,653 --> 01:09:20,446
I mention movies, and she
don't seem to dig that.
1261
01:09:20,447 --> 01:09:22,740
And then she asks me, why
don't I come to the flat.
1262
01:09:22,825 --> 01:09:25,118
And have some supper and
have the evening pass by.
1263
01:09:25,119 --> 01:09:28,246
By playing records
beside the groovy Hi-Fi?
1264
01:09:28,247 --> 01:09:29,747
I said yeh, yeh.
1265
01:09:30,040 --> 01:09:31,082
That's what I say
1266
01:09:31,083 --> 01:09:32,083
I said yeh, yeh.
1267
01:09:33,127 --> 01:09:35,795
My baby loves me, she
gets me feeling so fine.
1268
01:09:35,880 --> 01:09:38,464
When she loves me, she makes
me know that she's mine
1269
01:09:38,549 --> 01:09:40,258
I said yeh, yeh
1270
01:09:40,259 --> 01:09:41,926
I am Roy Baloney!
1271
01:09:41,927 --> 01:09:43,136
Yes!
1272
01:09:43,137 --> 01:09:45,138
- I'm full of it!
- You are!
1273
01:09:45,431 --> 01:09:48,266
We'll play a melody and
turn the lights down low.
1274
01:09:48,350 --> 01:09:49,601
So that none can see.
1275
01:09:49,602 --> 01:09:51,978
We gotta do that,
we gotta do that.
1276
01:09:52,062 --> 01:09:54,981
We gotta do that,
we gotta do that.
1277
01:09:54,982 --> 01:09:58,526
And there'll be no one else
alive in all the world.
1278
01:09:58,611 --> 01:09:59,819
'Cept you and me.
1279
01:09:59,904 --> 01:10:02,322
Yeh, yeh, yeh, yeh, yeh.
1280
01:10:02,323 --> 01:10:04,324
Yeh, yeh, yeh, yeh.
1281
01:10:04,325 --> 01:10:06,826
My pretty baby, I never
knew such a thrill.
1282
01:10:06,827 --> 01:10:09,537
It's hard to tell you,
because I'm tremblin' still.
1283
01:10:09,622 --> 01:10:12,790
My pretty baby, I want
you all for my own
1284
01:10:13,125 --> 01:10:14,459
Roy?
1285
01:10:14,627 --> 01:10:16,753
(Shouting, Laughter Continue)
1286
01:10:20,925 --> 01:10:22,008
Lin!
1287
01:10:22,092 --> 01:10:23,468
(Laughter, Shouting Stop)
1288
01:10:26,096 --> 01:10:27,680
It was his idea.
1289
01:10:29,225 --> 01:10:30,558
- Chon!
- Clothes!
1290
01:10:30,643 --> 01:10:31,643
(Grunts)
1291
01:10:31,977 --> 01:10:34,020
(Indistinct Conversations)
1292
01:11:01,340 --> 01:11:02,340
(Gasps)
1293
01:11:03,259 --> 01:11:05,009
Nice night for a walk.
1294
01:11:06,011 --> 01:11:07,011
Aah!
1295
01:11:09,890 --> 01:11:11,266
(Splash)
1296
01:11:11,392 --> 01:11:13,017
(Cursing In Mandarin)
1297
01:11:13,727 --> 01:11:14,852
ROY: Lin!
1298
01:11:14,853 --> 01:11:16,229
- Lin!
- There you are!
1299
01:11:16,313 --> 01:11:17,689
What are you doing?
1300
01:11:17,690 --> 01:11:20,024
Don't you know there's a
serial killer on the loose?
1301
01:11:20,651 --> 01:11:22,026
Forget it.
1302
01:11:22,111 --> 01:11:23,736
(Footsteps Approach)
1303
01:11:26,073 --> 01:11:27,615
(Footsteps Approach)
1304
01:11:29,868 --> 01:11:31,369
Who the hell are these guys?
1305
01:11:31,620 --> 01:11:32,704
Boxers.
1306
01:11:32,705 --> 01:11:34,205
What do they want with us?
1307
01:11:34,206 --> 01:11:35,707
RATHBONE: They're with me.
1308
01:11:39,044 --> 01:11:41,671
I think we need to
have a little chat.
1309
01:11:51,765 --> 01:11:53,182
Chon Wang,
1310
01:11:54,101 --> 01:11:56,853
the man who defied an emperor.
1311
01:11:56,979 --> 01:11:59,564
The emperor should never
have spared your life.
1312
01:12:00,149 --> 01:12:01,316
I see.
1313
01:12:01,900 --> 01:12:03,776
You're still my
brother's lapdog.
1314
01:12:03,861 --> 01:12:05,653
I'm here not for him.
1315
01:12:06,572 --> 01:12:08,489
I'm here for my father.
1316
01:12:08,657 --> 01:12:10,325
Of course you are.
1317
01:12:13,704 --> 01:12:17,081
It was my dagger that
plunged into his heart.
1318
01:12:17,458 --> 01:12:19,584
It's still crusted
with his blood.
1319
01:12:19,585 --> 01:12:20,585
Unh!
1320
01:12:20,711 --> 01:12:22,128
(Grunting)
1321
01:12:24,089 --> 01:12:26,257
I know the boy has the Seal.
1322
01:12:26,550 --> 01:12:27,800
Where is he?
1323
01:12:27,801 --> 01:12:29,093
We don't know.
1324
01:12:29,178 --> 01:12:30,928
That's the truth. We don't know.
1325
01:12:31,221 --> 01:12:32,263
Mmm...
1326
01:12:33,849 --> 01:12:36,267
What are you...
What are you doing?
1327
01:12:36,894 --> 01:12:37,894
Unh!
1328
01:12:39,605 --> 01:12:40,605
(Breathing Heavily)
1329
01:12:40,689 --> 01:12:42,774
ROY: Stop! Put her down!
1330
01:12:42,858 --> 01:12:44,359
Put her down! Put her down!
1331
01:12:44,443 --> 01:12:46,194
Or what, Mr. O'Bannon?
1332
01:12:46,278 --> 01:12:48,279
Are you gonna kick my ass?
1333
01:12:49,031 --> 01:12:52,033
I've read all about your
ridiculous exploits.
1334
01:12:52,117 --> 01:12:53,451
I mean, just...
1335
01:12:53,702 --> 01:12:57,663
How does it feel to kill a
Mummy with your bare hands?
1336
01:12:58,040 --> 01:13:00,166
Only a nation of
uneducated rednecks
1337
01:13:00,250 --> 01:13:02,835
would be amused by
such cowboy drivel.
1338
01:13:02,836 --> 01:13:04,796
Whoa, whoa, easy.
1339
01:13:04,880 --> 01:13:07,298
What's with the
personal attacks?
1340
01:13:07,466 --> 01:13:09,050
You don't see me
making any comments
1341
01:13:09,134 --> 01:13:11,177
about your pasty complexion
1342
01:13:11,178 --> 01:13:12,887
or your snotty accent,
1343
01:13:12,971 --> 01:13:15,681
or even your filthy,
smutty sex books.
1344
01:13:15,766 --> 01:13:17,683
Yeah, I saw your book.
It disgusted me.
1345
01:13:17,768 --> 01:13:20,144
Aah! Aaah!
1346
01:13:20,145 --> 01:13:22,772
Oh, why is it always the
head with you people?
1347
01:13:24,608 --> 01:13:25,983
- Roy: Hold it!
- (Muffled) Unh!
1348
01:13:25,984 --> 01:13:28,361
Stop! Hold it! Just hold it!
1349
01:13:28,445 --> 01:13:31,072
What are we doing here?
Guys, look at this.
1350
01:13:31,156 --> 01:13:33,783
We're acting like
animals over what?
1351
01:13:34,076 --> 01:13:35,410
Some seal?
1352
01:13:35,661 --> 01:13:37,954
The Seal represents
imperial power.
1353
01:13:38,747 --> 01:13:41,374
I will use it to unite
the emperor's enemies
1354
01:13:41,458 --> 01:13:44,502
and storm the Forbidden City.
1355
01:13:44,503 --> 01:13:45,920
What's in it for you?
1356
01:13:46,130 --> 01:13:48,214
You're looking at the
future King of England.
1357
01:13:48,298 --> 01:13:50,216
You're like the 20th
in line to the throne.
1358
01:13:50,217 --> 01:13:51,592
1 Oth.
1359
01:13:51,677 --> 01:13:57,014
But my friend is about to change all
that by a simple process of elimination.
1360
01:13:58,851 --> 01:13:59,851
(Snaps)
1361
01:14:01,562 --> 01:14:03,563
It's called a machine gun.
1362
01:14:03,564 --> 01:14:06,774
The first of its kind. It
fires 200 rounds a minute.
1363
01:14:06,859 --> 01:14:09,193
Testament to British ingenuity.
1364
01:14:09,862 --> 01:14:14,157
Oh, so you steal the Seal, and
then you knock off nine royals?
1365
01:14:15,993 --> 01:14:18,619
You got the short end of
that stick, my friend.
1366
01:14:20,038 --> 01:14:22,373
Unh! Unh!
1367
01:14:22,708 --> 01:14:24,208
Dump them in the river.
1368
01:14:25,169 --> 01:14:26,210
Unh!
1369
01:14:26,211 --> 01:14:27,420
Where are you taking her?
1370
01:14:27,504 --> 01:14:29,380
To make history.
1371
01:14:29,381 --> 01:14:31,591
I can already see
the headlines...
1372
01:14:31,675 --> 01:14:35,887
"Nation mourns as Loony Lin
massacres Royal Family."
1373
01:14:39,391 --> 01:14:41,434
Unh! Unh!
1374
01:14:41,852 --> 01:14:43,436
Unh! Unh!
1375
01:14:50,068 --> 01:14:54,238
I need your assurance that
you will find the Seal.
1376
01:14:54,239 --> 01:14:55,948
Don't concern yourself.
1377
01:14:55,949 --> 01:14:57,992
My men are scouring the city.
1378
01:14:58,160 --> 01:15:00,411
You better pray they find it,
1379
01:15:01,413 --> 01:15:07,043
or our agreement is over, and
you will never get the crown.
1380
01:15:09,087 --> 01:15:10,254
(Sighs)
1381
01:15:14,384 --> 01:15:16,761
Chon, I got a
confession to make.
1382
01:15:17,429 --> 01:15:19,430
You're in love with my sister.
1383
01:15:19,431 --> 01:15:21,098
That, but...
1384
01:15:21,350 --> 01:15:24,268
I didn't lose all the
money on the zeppelins.
1385
01:15:24,269 --> 01:15:25,311
No?
1386
01:15:25,854 --> 01:15:29,607
No, I blew most of it on
the Roy O'Bannon novels.
1387
01:15:30,108 --> 01:15:31,651
I wrote them.
1388
01:15:31,652 --> 01:15:33,361
No, Sage McCallister wrote them.
1389
01:15:33,445 --> 01:15:34,779
That's what I'm saying, buddy.
1390
01:15:34,863 --> 01:15:36,489
I'm Sage McCallister.
1391
01:15:41,578 --> 01:15:43,162
You wrote those lies?
1392
01:15:43,163 --> 01:15:44,956
I've always had low self-esteem.
1393
01:15:45,040 --> 01:15:46,499
How many books did you print?
1394
01:15:46,583 --> 01:15:48,793
I self-published probably
a million copies.
1395
01:15:48,794 --> 01:15:49,794
(Sighs)
1396
01:15:49,878 --> 01:15:51,719
We were actually second
to the Bible that year.
1397
01:15:51,797 --> 01:15:52,797
Oh, you...
1398
01:15:52,881 --> 01:15:56,801
I guess I'm just about the worst
friend a guy could ask for.
1399
01:15:57,386 --> 01:15:58,469
(Sighs)
1400
01:15:58,470 --> 01:16:01,305
No, you're a good friend.
1401
01:16:01,932 --> 01:16:03,015
Thank you.
1402
01:16:03,016 --> 01:16:06,185
If you really love Lin, I
won't stand in the way.
1403
01:16:06,562 --> 01:16:07,562
Really?
1404
01:16:07,646 --> 01:16:09,855
But if you break her heart,
1405
01:16:10,566 --> 01:16:11,983
I'll break your legs.
1406
01:16:11,984 --> 01:16:13,401
That's fair.
1407
01:16:13,485 --> 01:16:14,694
(Footsteps Approaching)
1408
01:16:14,695 --> 01:16:17,572
(Sighs) Well, friends
to the end, Chon.
1409
01:16:17,948 --> 01:16:19,657
And this is the end.
1410
01:16:20,492 --> 01:16:21,492
(Sighs)
1411
01:16:24,580 --> 01:16:25,746
Chon, you got a plan?
1412
01:16:25,831 --> 01:16:27,331
You wouldn't happen to
have a plan, would you?
1413
01:16:27,416 --> 01:16:28,416
Yes.
1414
01:16:28,500 --> 01:16:30,293
- Anything I can do?
- No.
1415
01:16:30,460 --> 01:16:33,212
Good. I'll let you do the
heavy lifting, then.
1416
01:16:34,339 --> 01:16:35,673
(Grunts)
1417
01:16:40,679 --> 01:16:41,846
(Grunts)
1418
01:16:43,015 --> 01:16:44,181
(Grunting)
1419
01:16:46,476 --> 01:16:48,185
(Shouting)
1420
01:16:48,186 --> 01:16:49,186
Chon, hurry!
1421
01:16:49,271 --> 01:16:50,271
(Wang Grunting)
1422
01:16:51,857 --> 01:16:52,857
(Grunts)
1423
01:16:53,525 --> 01:16:55,568
- MAN: Aaah!
- (Whooshing)
1424
01:16:55,569 --> 01:16:56,569
ROY: Chon!
1425
01:16:56,653 --> 01:16:57,695
Chon! Chon, hurry!
1426
01:16:57,779 --> 01:16:58,904
Hurry!
1427
01:16:58,989 --> 01:17:00,698
Hurry! Chon, hurry!
1428
01:17:00,782 --> 01:17:01,866
Roy!
1429
01:17:05,704 --> 01:17:06,871
Coming!
1430
01:17:08,832 --> 01:17:09,874
Chon!
1431
01:17:09,875 --> 01:17:11,125
(Shouting In Mandarin)
1432
01:17:11,209 --> 01:17:12,209
Oh!
1433
01:17:13,545 --> 01:17:15,046
ROY: The water's so dirty!
1434
01:17:15,130 --> 01:17:17,214
No! No! It's dirty! No!
1435
01:17:21,845 --> 01:17:23,054
(Gasps)
1436
01:17:31,396 --> 01:17:32,855
(Grunting)
1437
01:17:38,528 --> 01:17:39,528
Aah!
1438
01:17:42,949 --> 01:17:43,949
Aah!
1439
01:17:45,202 --> 01:17:48,412
Just go ahead and drown me.
I don't care anymore.
1440
01:17:49,581 --> 01:17:51,248
Aaah!
1441
01:17:52,125 --> 01:17:53,209
Roy!
1442
01:17:54,252 --> 01:17:55,252
(Grunts)
1443
01:18:00,676 --> 01:18:02,426
(Hissing)
1444
01:18:07,432 --> 01:18:08,933
(Muffled)
1445
01:18:14,106 --> 01:18:15,106
(Grunting)
1446
01:18:29,496 --> 01:18:30,746
(Knocking On Door)
1447
01:18:38,422 --> 01:18:40,381
(Knocking Continues)
1448
01:18:52,477 --> 01:18:54,228
You look ridiculous.
1449
01:18:54,312 --> 01:18:56,021
(Crickets Chirping)
1450
01:18:56,106 --> 01:18:57,606
I think we look good.
1451
01:18:59,985 --> 01:19:03,028
I really must protest
this intrusion.
1452
01:19:03,113 --> 01:19:07,158
Every Bobby in London is out
scouring the streets for you two.
1453
01:19:07,242 --> 01:19:08,659
Have you been drinking?
1454
01:19:08,869 --> 01:19:12,163
I always drink when my
employment's been terminated.
1455
01:19:12,164 --> 01:19:13,247
They fired you?
1456
01:19:13,331 --> 01:19:15,249
Your Lord Rathbone saw to that.
1457
01:19:15,333 --> 01:19:16,375
I'm sorry.
1458
01:19:17,252 --> 01:19:19,336
It's of no consequence.
1459
01:19:19,337 --> 01:19:22,339
I never wanted to be an
inspector in the first place.
1460
01:19:22,340 --> 01:19:24,341
It was my father's idea.
1461
01:19:25,010 --> 01:19:27,136
I always wanted to be a writer.
1462
01:19:28,180 --> 01:19:29,346
Yeah.
1463
01:19:29,347 --> 01:19:31,098
Artie, we need your help.
1464
01:19:31,183 --> 01:19:32,725
Rathbone has taken Lin.
1465
01:19:32,809 --> 01:19:35,853
He's gonna kill the Royal Family
and he's gonna assume the throne.
1466
01:19:35,854 --> 01:19:41,400
Do you have any evidence to support
these preposterous allegations?
1467
01:19:41,526 --> 01:19:43,903
We have this. It's the boy's.
1468
01:19:44,529 --> 01:19:46,906
Use your technique.
Tell us where he is.
1469
01:19:48,909 --> 01:19:51,368
Paraffin wax...
Most interesting.
1470
01:19:52,120 --> 01:19:54,914
He's at a church. The little
punk's hiding in a church.
1471
01:19:54,915 --> 01:19:56,290
No, no, no.
1472
01:19:56,374 --> 01:19:58,125
It's not candle wax.
1473
01:19:58,418 --> 01:19:59,668
I have it.
1474
01:20:02,005 --> 01:20:03,380
(Muffled Talking)
1475
01:20:03,381 --> 01:20:05,090
- Don't worry. You'll get it.
- What are you doing?
1476
01:20:05,175 --> 01:20:06,383
He's picking the lock.
1477
01:20:06,468 --> 01:20:08,385
- Hurry up!
- Chon, please!
1478
01:20:08,386 --> 01:20:10,596
It's a very meticulous process.
1479
01:20:10,597 --> 01:20:14,099
Let Artie do his job.
It's almost an art form.
1480
01:20:14,100 --> 01:20:15,601
It takes the precision
of a surgeon.
1481
01:20:16,561 --> 01:20:18,437
You have to be so precise.
1482
01:20:18,522 --> 01:20:21,190
Maybe if we jam
another one in there.
1483
01:20:25,529 --> 01:20:26,987
That works, too.
1484
01:20:27,322 --> 01:20:29,281
Lacks a certain finesse.
1485
01:20:33,036 --> 01:20:35,621
All right, all right.
Let's split up.
1486
01:20:54,933 --> 01:20:55,933
Ugh.
1487
01:21:10,782 --> 01:21:11,782
Aaah!
1488
01:21:13,118 --> 01:21:14,952
(Grunting)
1489
01:21:22,919 --> 01:21:24,295
(Grunting)
1490
01:21:37,601 --> 01:21:38,809
Ugh.
1491
01:21:38,810 --> 01:21:39,810
Aah!
1492
01:21:39,895 --> 01:21:41,562
(Ragtime Piano Music Plays)
1493
01:21:41,646 --> 01:21:42,980
What the...
1494
01:21:47,152 --> 01:21:49,820
I am gonna break your neck.
Come here.
1495
01:21:56,828 --> 01:21:57,912
Aaah!
1496
01:21:57,996 --> 01:21:59,038
Aah!
1497
01:22:06,254 --> 01:22:08,339
(Man Shouting In Cantonese)
1498
01:22:09,758 --> 01:22:10,925
(Shouting In Cantonese)
1499
01:22:11,009 --> 01:22:12,343
(Shouting In Cantonese)
1500
01:22:12,427 --> 01:22:13,844
(Clanking)
1501
01:22:19,768 --> 01:22:21,018
CHARLIE: Ah-choo!
1502
01:22:29,819 --> 01:22:30,903
(Gasps)
1503
01:22:30,904 --> 01:22:31,946
Looky, here.
1504
01:22:32,030 --> 01:22:34,114
- Come on, where is it?
- What?
1505
01:22:34,199 --> 01:22:35,783
You know what I'm talking about.
1506
01:22:35,867 --> 01:22:37,242
Don't give me that "what."
1507
01:22:37,327 --> 01:22:39,203
What do we got here?
1508
01:22:39,204 --> 01:22:40,621
Oh, yes.
1509
01:22:42,248 --> 01:22:44,458
You don't mind if I
take this back, do you?
1510
01:22:44,584 --> 01:22:46,085
Go on, get out of here.
1511
01:22:46,086 --> 01:22:47,086
Go!
1512
01:22:47,170 --> 01:22:48,253
WANG: Roy?
1513
01:22:48,254 --> 01:22:49,338
I got it.
1514
01:22:52,467 --> 01:22:53,968
MAN: Give me the Seal.
1515
01:22:55,053 --> 01:22:57,054
Give me the Seal!
1516
01:23:10,360 --> 01:23:12,236
- MAN: All right, spread out!
- (Whistle Blows)
1517
01:23:12,237 --> 01:23:13,737
Through there!
1518
01:23:14,614 --> 01:23:15,906
Let's go.
1519
01:23:16,574 --> 01:23:18,075
(Panting)
1520
01:23:25,583 --> 01:23:27,084
The gig's up.
1521
01:23:28,086 --> 01:23:29,086
(Sighs)
1522
01:23:29,170 --> 01:23:30,170
(Hoofbeats)
1523
01:23:36,553 --> 01:23:38,512
So what are we gonna do?
1524
01:23:41,433 --> 01:23:42,850
Come on, think!
1525
01:23:42,934 --> 01:23:44,977
I'm not going to
an English prison.
1526
01:23:45,061 --> 01:23:48,355
With my feathery blond hair
and Chon's athletic build,
1527
01:23:48,440 --> 01:23:49,982
they'll try to make us
the belle of the ball.
1528
01:23:50,066 --> 01:23:51,984
Forget it. I'm not going back.
1529
01:23:53,069 --> 01:23:54,153
ARTIE: Well...
1530
01:23:54,154 --> 01:23:56,447
At least we'll get a good
view of the fireworks
1531
01:23:56,531 --> 01:23:57,865
from Scotland Yard.
1532
01:23:58,241 --> 01:23:59,283
Fireworks?
1533
01:23:59,367 --> 01:24:00,367
Yeah.
1534
01:24:00,452 --> 01:24:02,453
At midnight, they're
launching this huge display
1535
01:24:02,454 --> 01:24:04,329
from a flotilla of
barges on the Thames.
1536
01:24:04,330 --> 01:24:06,790
It's the official kickoff
to the Queen's jubilee.
1537
01:24:07,459 --> 01:24:09,293
Is the Royal Family
gonna be there?
1538
01:24:10,211 --> 01:24:12,671
They're gonna be viewing the
spectacle from a balcony
1539
01:24:12,756 --> 01:24:14,465
overlooking the river.
1540
01:24:14,549 --> 01:24:16,425
He's got a machine
gun on the barge.
1541
01:24:18,178 --> 01:24:19,219
Yes.
1542
01:24:20,472 --> 01:24:21,472
(Thud)
1543
01:24:21,806 --> 01:24:23,265
(Footsteps)
1544
01:24:23,433 --> 01:24:24,433
(Grunts)
1545
01:24:28,813 --> 01:24:30,314
You gents lost your way?
1546
01:24:30,315 --> 01:24:31,857
Kid, tell me you got a way out.
1547
01:24:42,911 --> 01:24:43,994
(Exhales Sharply)
1548
01:24:45,705 --> 01:24:46,997
ROY: Nice move, kid.
1549
01:24:47,248 --> 01:24:48,582
So why did you come back?
1550
01:24:49,417 --> 01:24:51,210
Why did you give up the Seal?
1551
01:24:53,963 --> 01:24:55,631
'Cause I'm a fool.
1552
01:24:57,258 --> 01:24:58,926
Guess I'm a fool, too.
1553
01:24:59,552 --> 01:25:01,178
Put her there, fool.
1554
01:25:02,305 --> 01:25:03,514
I never got your name.
1555
01:25:03,598 --> 01:25:05,224
Name's Chaplin.
1556
01:25:05,809 --> 01:25:08,102
Charlie Chaplin.
1557
01:25:09,521 --> 01:25:10,729
(Symphonic Music Plays)
1558
01:25:12,273 --> 01:25:13,690
(Cheering)
1559
01:25:30,458 --> 01:25:32,209
(Cheers Intensify)
1560
01:25:48,601 --> 01:25:50,435
(Speaking Mandarin)
1561
01:26:05,743 --> 01:26:07,411
(Cheers And Applause)
1562
01:26:08,413 --> 01:26:09,830
Excuse me.
1563
01:26:09,914 --> 01:26:11,081
Excuse me, please!
1564
01:26:11,166 --> 01:26:12,499
Excuse me.
1565
01:26:21,217 --> 01:26:22,801
You warn the Royal Family.
1566
01:26:22,886 --> 01:26:24,178
I'll save Lin.
1567
01:26:24,262 --> 01:26:26,305
How on Earth are
you gonna do that?
1568
01:26:26,306 --> 01:26:27,306
Aaah!
1569
01:26:39,944 --> 01:26:41,862
(Cheers And Applause)
1570
01:26:46,159 --> 01:26:48,076
(Cheers And Applause)
1571
01:26:57,253 --> 01:26:58,754
(Bell Tolls)
1572
01:27:12,310 --> 01:27:14,102
(Tolling Continues)
1573
01:27:23,321 --> 01:27:25,322
(HIGH-PITCHED HISSING)
1574
01:27:30,286 --> 01:27:31,912
Ooh! (Laughing)
1575
01:27:46,219 --> 01:27:47,511
(Gasps)
1576
01:27:53,351 --> 01:27:54,643
You okay?
1577
01:27:55,353 --> 01:27:56,353
(Grunting)
1578
01:28:00,692 --> 01:28:02,025
I just saved you!
1579
01:28:02,026 --> 01:28:03,193
You were late!
1580
01:28:03,278 --> 01:28:04,444
What?
1581
01:28:07,198 --> 01:28:08,323
(Laughing)
1582
01:28:09,033 --> 01:28:10,117
Nelson?
1583
01:28:23,172 --> 01:28:24,923
Why are you hiding
yourself back there?
1584
01:28:24,924 --> 01:28:27,259
I shouldn't like to impede
your view, Your Highness.
1585
01:28:27,260 --> 01:28:29,303
Nonsense! You arranged all this.
1586
01:28:29,387 --> 01:28:31,138
You should have a
front-row view.
1587
01:28:31,222 --> 01:28:34,391
I regret that respectfully
I must decline.
1588
01:28:35,143 --> 01:28:37,477
I need to keep a good
eye on proceedings.
1589
01:28:39,731 --> 01:28:41,398
Whoo! (Laughing)
1590
01:28:42,358 --> 01:28:44,484
Nelson, you've outdone yourself.
1591
01:28:44,694 --> 01:28:47,070
Wait till you see the finale.
1592
01:28:51,576 --> 01:28:52,868
LIN: Hey!
1593
01:28:55,621 --> 01:28:56,705
Hey!
1594
01:28:57,415 --> 01:28:59,082
(Shouting)
1595
01:29:02,086 --> 01:29:03,128
Oh!
1596
01:29:34,869 --> 01:29:36,036
Ugghh!
1597
01:30:08,569 --> 01:30:09,986
This is hopeless.
1598
01:30:09,987 --> 01:30:11,863
We're not gonna get
past the guards.
1599
01:30:11,864 --> 01:30:13,532
Not with that
attitude, we won't.
1600
01:30:13,533 --> 01:30:15,992
Come on, Artie, there's gotta be a way.
There's always...
1601
01:30:16,077 --> 01:30:17,536
(Horse Neighs)
1602
01:30:28,673 --> 01:30:30,006
LIN: Aaah!
1603
01:30:30,883 --> 01:30:31,967
Lin!
1604
01:30:59,996 --> 01:31:01,079
Aaah!
1605
01:31:08,212 --> 01:31:09,463
(Horse Neighs)
1606
01:31:09,547 --> 01:31:10,547
ROY: Yeah!
1607
01:31:10,631 --> 01:31:11,882
Yee-haw!
1608
01:31:12,508 --> 01:31:13,717
Yee-haw!
1609
01:31:15,720 --> 01:31:17,387
We got to jump it!
1610
01:31:17,972 --> 01:31:19,055
Aaah!
1611
01:31:21,225 --> 01:31:22,392
(Neighs)
1612
01:31:22,393 --> 01:31:23,393
Aaah!
1613
01:31:23,478 --> 01:31:24,561
Aaah!
1614
01:31:42,705 --> 01:31:44,164
(Squeaking)
1615
01:32:05,269 --> 01:32:06,645
(Whooshes)
1616
01:32:08,648 --> 01:32:10,106
LIN: Wu Chow!
1617
01:32:19,450 --> 01:32:21,284
(Breathing Heavily)
1618
01:32:22,662 --> 01:32:23,662
(Sighs)
1619
01:32:27,458 --> 01:32:29,209
Hold it right there, Rathboner.
1620
01:32:29,293 --> 01:32:30,502
(Horse Neighs)
1621
01:32:30,586 --> 01:32:31,795
Ugh! Oh.
1622
01:32:32,088 --> 01:32:33,505
I'm guessing by
your hasty retreat
1623
01:32:33,506 --> 01:32:36,007
that you're still 20th
in line for the throne.
1624
01:32:36,092 --> 01:32:37,175
1 Oth.
1625
01:32:37,385 --> 01:32:39,803
Inspector Doyle,
arrest this man.
1626
01:32:43,266 --> 01:32:44,307
He's got a gun!
1627
01:32:44,392 --> 01:32:45,433
Oh!
1628
01:32:47,728 --> 01:32:48,979
Come on!
1629
01:32:50,648 --> 01:32:51,731
You okay?
1630
01:32:51,816 --> 01:32:53,233
What happened?
1631
01:32:53,317 --> 01:32:55,986
Rathbone nailed Artie
with a little sissy gun.
1632
01:32:56,070 --> 01:32:57,904
I'll look after him. You two go.
1633
01:32:57,989 --> 01:32:58,989
Go!
1634
01:33:07,164 --> 01:33:08,540
For Father.
1635
01:33:09,250 --> 01:33:10,625
For Father.
1636
01:33:11,210 --> 01:33:12,836
For old man Wang.
1637
01:33:17,508 --> 01:33:19,926
My lucky playing cards.
1638
01:33:28,769 --> 01:33:30,145
Be careful.
1639
01:33:31,022 --> 01:33:33,398
Tell Rathbone to be careful.
1640
01:33:33,482 --> 01:33:34,983
Roy, let's go.
1641
01:33:42,325 --> 01:33:44,367
You're gonna need a bigger gun!
1642
01:34:02,261 --> 01:34:03,553
You see him?
1643
01:34:03,554 --> 01:34:04,596
No.
1644
01:34:05,222 --> 01:34:07,223
Show your face, Rathbone!
1645
01:34:07,350 --> 01:34:09,059
I'm gonna tear this guy apart.
1646
01:34:09,060 --> 01:34:10,935
Roy, you go this way,
I'll go that way.
1647
01:34:10,936 --> 01:34:13,897
Split up? I don't know
if that's a good idea.
1648
01:34:13,898 --> 01:34:15,231
It's okay.
1649
01:34:15,983 --> 01:34:17,067
Aah.
1650
01:34:24,325 --> 01:34:25,950
He's not up here.
1651
01:34:27,912 --> 01:34:29,537
WANG: Roy, keep going.
1652
01:34:33,209 --> 01:34:34,834
Come on, Roy.
1653
01:34:48,224 --> 01:34:49,974
Hey, uh, Rathbone,
1654
01:34:50,601 --> 01:34:53,687
was just thinking of a
title for my new book,
1655
01:34:53,979 --> 01:34:57,357
Roy O'Bannon vs.
Little Lord Sissy.
1656
01:34:57,942 --> 01:35:01,194
Or what about Roy O'Bannon vs.
The Man Who Would Be Queen?
1657
01:35:04,699 --> 01:35:06,116
No sign of him, Chon.
1658
01:35:06,200 --> 01:35:07,826
The coast is clear up here.
1659
01:35:13,791 --> 01:35:15,291
Roy! Look out!
1660
01:35:16,085 --> 01:35:17,168
Aaah!
1661
01:35:17,962 --> 01:35:19,045
Roy!
1662
01:35:19,130 --> 01:35:20,213
Oops.
1663
01:35:22,091 --> 01:35:23,425
(Grunts)
1664
01:35:24,468 --> 01:35:26,177
RATHBONE: Come on up.
1665
01:35:26,178 --> 01:35:27,971
I'll show you how
your father died.
1666
01:35:31,767 --> 01:35:32,976
Uuuhh!
1667
01:35:36,147 --> 01:35:37,522
(Clinking)
1668
01:36:05,968 --> 01:36:07,343
(Grunting)
1669
01:36:08,220 --> 01:36:09,721
Lord, help me.
1670
01:36:10,473 --> 01:36:13,016
Just let me know you're there.
Love me. Hate me.
1671
01:36:13,017 --> 01:36:15,185
But let me know you're up there!
1672
01:36:15,269 --> 01:36:17,562
I can see our hotel from here.
1673
01:36:17,563 --> 01:36:18,730
Wow.
1674
01:36:18,731 --> 01:36:19,731
Uhh!
1675
01:36:19,815 --> 01:36:21,191
(Clinking)
1676
01:36:31,744 --> 01:36:33,119
Come along.
1677
01:36:33,537 --> 01:36:34,954
I'm waiting.
1678
01:36:36,248 --> 01:36:38,583
Come on, Roy. Okay.
1679
01:36:38,584 --> 01:36:40,752
Roy O'Bannon will
not go quietly.
1680
01:36:40,836 --> 01:36:42,212
You hear that, England?
1681
01:36:42,213 --> 01:36:44,047
Throw whatever you want at me,
1682
01:36:44,131 --> 01:36:47,091
your terrible weather,
your perverted killers,
1683
01:36:47,092 --> 01:36:48,927
your spotted dick!
1684
01:36:48,928 --> 01:36:50,512
(Grunting)
1685
01:37:25,923 --> 01:37:27,590
Roy, you're about to die.
1686
01:37:27,675 --> 01:37:29,968
You're on the minute
hand of a clock.
1687
01:37:29,969 --> 01:37:33,012
Oh! My life is flashing
before my eyes.
1688
01:37:33,806 --> 01:37:36,432
Wait a minute. I
don't remember her.
1689
01:37:52,074 --> 01:37:53,283
One more.
1690
01:38:08,674 --> 01:38:09,716
One more.
1691
01:38:31,947 --> 01:38:33,489
Oh! (Panting)
1692
01:38:38,871 --> 01:38:40,538
How disappointing.
1693
01:38:43,542 --> 01:38:44,834
One more.
1694
01:38:57,348 --> 01:38:59,140
You killed my friend.
1695
01:39:05,314 --> 01:39:06,898
You killed my father!
1696
01:39:17,368 --> 01:39:18,493
Aaah!
1697
01:39:26,877 --> 01:39:28,962
Roy! (Panting)
1698
01:39:29,046 --> 01:39:31,130
I thought you were dead! Oh!
1699
01:39:31,215 --> 01:39:35,927
You think some tea-drinking
psycho can take out Roy O'Bannon?
1700
01:39:35,928 --> 01:39:37,345
(Grunting)
1701
01:39:41,558 --> 01:39:42,934
(Grunting)
1702
01:39:44,645 --> 01:39:46,020
(Panting)
1703
01:39:47,439 --> 01:39:48,564
Whoa.
1704
01:39:48,565 --> 01:39:50,316
Easy there, cowboy.
1705
01:39:53,862 --> 01:39:54,946
Huh?
1706
01:39:55,030 --> 01:39:56,114
Aaah!
1707
01:39:58,784 --> 01:40:00,201
(Whirring)
1708
01:40:01,870 --> 01:40:02,954
Aaah!
1709
01:40:03,455 --> 01:40:04,580
Aaah!
1710
01:40:06,041 --> 01:40:07,667
(Both Grunting)
1711
01:40:13,257 --> 01:40:14,424
You got any ideas?
1712
01:40:14,550 --> 01:40:15,591
Aah.
1713
01:40:16,093 --> 01:40:17,719
(Both Grunting)
1714
01:40:19,471 --> 01:40:21,556
- (Panting) We jump!
- Jump?
1715
01:40:23,267 --> 01:40:24,559
You mean fall?
1716
01:40:25,144 --> 01:40:26,436
Aim for the flag!
1717
01:40:26,437 --> 01:40:27,812
Ah, shit.
1718
01:40:28,063 --> 01:40:29,439
(Grunts)
1719
01:40:29,440 --> 01:40:31,024
I gotta tell you something.
1720
01:40:31,108 --> 01:40:32,442
What?
1721
01:40:32,443 --> 01:40:35,153
You're the best sidekick
I could ever ask for.
1722
01:40:35,154 --> 01:40:36,654
Thank you, Roy.
1723
01:40:36,655 --> 01:40:38,448
I feel the same about you.
1724
01:40:38,532 --> 01:40:39,782
(Grunts)
1725
01:40:39,783 --> 01:40:41,117
On three.
1726
01:40:41,118 --> 01:40:42,285
One...
1727
01:40:42,369 --> 01:40:43,619
Two...
1728
01:40:43,620 --> 01:40:44,787
BOTH: Three!
1729
01:40:44,872 --> 01:40:46,080
Aaaaah!
1730
01:40:51,503 --> 01:40:52,754
Aaaaaah!
1731
01:40:57,968 --> 01:40:59,052
Aaah!
1732
01:41:02,806 --> 01:41:06,142
Aaah! Aaah! Aaah-haa!
1733
01:41:06,143 --> 01:41:07,810
Aaah! Aaah!
1734
01:41:08,062 --> 01:41:09,604
Aaah! Aah! Aah!
1735
01:41:11,523 --> 01:41:12,982
Roy. Roy!
1736
01:41:13,067 --> 01:41:14,150
Aah!
1737
01:41:16,528 --> 01:41:17,695
Howdy.
1738
01:41:19,782 --> 01:41:21,657
(Trumpet Music Plays)
1739
01:41:22,034 --> 01:41:24,744
In recognition of
outstanding bravery,
1740
01:41:25,245 --> 01:41:27,997
I dub you Sir Chon Wang.
1741
01:41:33,420 --> 01:41:35,421
For uncommon valor,
1742
01:41:35,506 --> 01:41:38,674
I dub you Sir Roy O'Bannon.
1743
01:41:44,640 --> 01:41:47,475
And for steadfast
dedication to justice,
1744
01:41:48,185 --> 01:41:51,104
I dub you Sir
Arthur Conan Doyle.
1745
01:41:56,902 --> 01:41:58,069
Arise.
1746
01:42:13,460 --> 01:42:15,211
Who loves you, baby?
1747
01:42:30,769 --> 01:42:31,894
(Sighs)
1748
01:42:32,396 --> 01:42:33,563
MAN: Madam.
1749
01:42:36,108 --> 01:42:39,152
Artie, I bet Scotland Yard's
dying to get you back now.
1750
01:42:39,236 --> 01:42:41,487
My official crime-fighting
days are over.
1751
01:42:41,572 --> 01:42:42,905
The Queen has asked me to
1752
01:42:42,906 --> 01:42:45,074
accompany the Imperial
Seal back to China.
1753
01:42:45,159 --> 01:42:46,409
What a week. Unbelievable.
1754
01:42:46,493 --> 01:42:48,494
She couldn't have picked a
better man, right, Chon?
1755
01:42:48,495 --> 01:42:49,620
Yeah.
1756
01:42:49,705 --> 01:42:52,623
And the voyage is gonna give me
time to work on my new novel.
1757
01:42:52,916 --> 01:42:54,959
It features a new
kind of detective,
1758
01:42:54,960 --> 01:42:57,920
and he's gonna solve crimes
using deductive reasoning.
1759
01:42:58,130 --> 01:42:59,589
Give me a name. What's his name?
1760
01:42:59,673 --> 01:43:01,340
Actually, Roy, I
was rather hoping
1761
01:43:01,425 --> 01:43:04,051
to call him Sherlock Holmes,
if that's all right with you.
1762
01:43:06,138 --> 01:43:08,472
I'd be insulted if
you didn't use it.
1763
01:43:08,473 --> 01:43:09,891
(Laughing)
1764
01:43:11,393 --> 01:43:12,727
(Grunts)
1765
01:43:15,105 --> 01:43:16,314
See you, Artie.
1766
01:43:18,317 --> 01:43:20,484
That was very nice of you, Roy.
1767
01:43:20,569 --> 01:43:22,945
I would've kept the name if
I thought it was any good.
1768
01:43:22,946 --> 01:43:24,655
It's a horrible name
for a detective,
1769
01:43:24,740 --> 01:43:26,824
Sherlock Holmes, Holmes.
1770
01:43:26,825 --> 01:43:28,326
(Laughing)
1771
01:43:28,410 --> 01:43:30,328
Will you stop playing with that?
I'm gonna smash it.
1772
01:43:30,329 --> 01:43:31,454
I just want to see
it for a second.
1773
01:43:31,538 --> 01:43:32,622
Just let me see it.
1774
01:43:32,623 --> 01:43:34,332
No, you're gonna break it.
1775
01:43:35,334 --> 01:43:37,710
It's just a rock with
some gibberish on it.
1776
01:43:37,794 --> 01:43:39,295
That's Chinese.
1777
01:43:40,797 --> 01:43:42,924
"Family is forever, my son."
1778
01:43:43,550 --> 01:43:46,052
"I'm proud you cast
your own stone."
1779
01:43:48,138 --> 01:43:50,139
Wow. That's a good message.
1780
01:43:52,726 --> 01:43:53,726
(Sighs)
1781
01:43:57,564 --> 01:44:00,107
I'd like to cast my
own stone, Chon.
1782
01:44:07,157 --> 01:44:08,157
Hi.
1783
01:44:08,242 --> 01:44:09,283
Hi.
1784
01:44:14,498 --> 01:44:17,333
I told you, the house of
O'Bannon will prevail.
1785
01:44:23,173 --> 01:44:25,466
Chon, I got a business
proposition for you.
1786
01:44:26,009 --> 01:44:27,385
No more zeppelins.
1787
01:44:27,469 --> 01:44:29,345
No, no, this is much
better than zeppelins...
1788
01:44:29,346 --> 01:44:32,682
A new thing they're starting out in
California called moving pictures.
1789
01:44:32,683 --> 01:44:33,849
Pass.
1790
01:44:33,850 --> 01:44:35,351
Hold it. Hold it. Hear me out.
1791
01:44:35,352 --> 01:44:37,770
I really think these movies
could play to your strength.
1792
01:44:37,854 --> 01:44:40,856
There's no sounds. We don't have to
worry about the language problem.
1793
01:44:40,857 --> 01:44:44,735
And I think the kung fu
stuff could be huge.
1794
01:44:44,736 --> 01:44:46,946
People are dying for a
good action picture.
1795
01:44:47,406 --> 01:44:49,198
What do you think?
1796
01:44:49,283 --> 01:44:51,409
Chon Wang, movie star?
1797
01:44:51,994 --> 01:44:53,077
It could work.
1798
01:44:54,162 --> 01:44:56,747
ROY: I feel bad about
ditching that Chaplin kid,
1799
01:44:56,832 --> 01:44:59,709
but we're gonna be running
and gunning in Hollywood,
1800
01:44:59,710 --> 01:45:01,544
and he'd just cramp our style.
1801
01:45:01,545 --> 01:45:03,462
It's such a tough town.
1802
01:45:20,022 --> 01:45:21,439
Bloody tourists!
1803
01:45:22,232 --> 01:45:23,482
MAN: Action!
1804
01:45:23,775 --> 01:45:25,776
(Upbeat Rock Music Plays)
1805
01:45:27,988 --> 01:45:30,740
(Singing) People try
to put us d-down.
1806
01:45:30,824 --> 01:45:33,284
Talkin' 'bout my generation.
1807
01:45:33,285 --> 01:45:35,494
Just because we get around.
1808
01:45:35,579 --> 01:45:38,247
Talkin' 'bout my generation
1809
01:45:39,583 --> 01:45:40,666
(Laughing)
1810
01:45:40,751 --> 01:45:42,585
You have to say "cut."
1811
01:45:43,587 --> 01:45:45,463
You just keep looking!
1812
01:45:45,756 --> 01:45:48,174
Talkin' 'bout my generation.
1813
01:45:48,258 --> 01:45:49,258
Ouch.
1814
01:45:49,760 --> 01:45:52,928
This is my generation, baby.
1815
01:45:53,388 --> 01:45:55,181
Come here, you little minx.
1816
01:45:55,640 --> 01:45:56,974
MAN: Cut.
1817
01:45:56,975 --> 01:46:00,144
- That was a good one, huh?
- (Laughing)
1818
01:46:00,145 --> 01:46:01,604
(Buzzer)
1819
01:46:01,605 --> 01:46:04,732
Maybe on this one I should lick you.
You think?
1820
01:46:05,192 --> 01:46:08,110
Like, after you lick me...
That could be kind of good.
1821
01:46:08,945 --> 01:46:10,279
And, Jackie...
1822
01:46:10,655 --> 01:46:12,156
Jackie? Thank you.
1823
01:46:12,157 --> 01:46:14,492
Hi, Owen. Hello. How are you?
1824
01:46:14,576 --> 01:46:16,952
Okay. And I'm not Roy O'Bannon.
1825
01:46:17,037 --> 01:46:18,662
Who are you?
1826
01:46:18,663 --> 01:46:19,789
(Both Laughing)
1827
01:46:19,873 --> 01:46:21,624
Damn it, Chon, I
think she's the one.
1828
01:46:21,708 --> 01:46:24,293
I know it's crazy. We just
met, but she's the one.
1829
01:46:24,378 --> 01:46:26,837
No, Roy, she's my babysitter.
1830
01:46:29,633 --> 01:46:31,300
Your babys...
1831
01:46:31,551 --> 01:46:32,635
What?
1832
01:46:33,261 --> 01:46:34,303
Baby what?
1833
01:46:34,388 --> 01:46:35,388
Baby sister.
1834
01:46:35,472 --> 01:46:36,972
Baby... Baby sister?
1835
01:46:37,057 --> 01:46:39,183
Not babysitter, baby sister.
1836
01:46:39,267 --> 01:46:40,643
(Laughter)
1837
01:46:44,398 --> 01:46:45,815
(Laughter)
1838
01:46:49,528 --> 01:46:52,071
(Thud, Glass Breaking)
1839
01:46:52,155 --> 01:46:53,322
You okay?
1840
01:46:54,741 --> 01:46:55,741
MAN: Action!
1841
01:46:55,826 --> 01:46:57,326
(Grunts)
1842
01:46:57,411 --> 01:46:58,828
Ugh!
1843
01:46:58,912 --> 01:47:00,079
CHAN: What happened?
1844
01:47:00,414 --> 01:47:03,040
Roy is the type of a
friend you never introduce
1845
01:47:03,125 --> 01:47:05,876
to your other friends or
bring into your family.
1846
01:47:05,877 --> 01:47:07,545
He's... Look at his eyes.
1847
01:47:07,546 --> 01:47:09,588
They're brown... Full of shit.
1848
01:47:09,673 --> 01:47:10,923
Always...
1849
01:47:11,466 --> 01:47:13,092
Just bullshit all the time.
1850
01:47:13,760 --> 01:47:15,010
Yeah, have you ever
heard of those?
1851
01:47:15,095 --> 01:47:17,721
They're parents. We have
parents that love us.
1852
01:47:17,722 --> 01:47:20,683
You don't, 'cause
you're a little orphan.
1853
01:47:20,684 --> 01:47:21,934
(Laughs)
1854
01:47:22,018 --> 01:47:25,062
We've got par... Yeah, parents.
1855
01:47:25,063 --> 01:47:27,523
Have you ever heard of those?
We've got parents that love us.
1856
01:47:27,524 --> 01:47:30,151
But you don't, 'cause
you're a little orphan.
1857
01:47:31,611 --> 01:47:33,237
Oh, n... Go on.
1858
01:47:33,321 --> 01:47:34,405
(Laughing)
1859
01:47:34,406 --> 01:47:36,866
So mean. (Laughing)
1860
01:47:37,534 --> 01:47:39,535
Chon Wang, movie star?
1861
01:47:40,245 --> 01:47:41,370
It could work.
1862
01:47:41,455 --> 01:47:44,206
It could work. You could
do your own stunts.
1863
01:47:44,291 --> 01:47:45,875
What? Think about...
1864
01:47:45,876 --> 01:47:46,959
(Laughter)
1865
01:47:49,379 --> 01:47:50,421
Aah!
1866
01:47:51,965 --> 01:47:53,340
Whoa! Whoa!
1867
01:47:54,968 --> 01:47:56,927
Stay here and be a good horsey
1868
01:47:57,012 --> 01:47:58,596
for the new sheriff.
1869
01:47:58,722 --> 01:48:00,514
Ouch! Oh!
1870
01:48:01,349 --> 01:48:02,683
Ow. That hurt.
1871
01:48:06,188 --> 01:48:07,396
Ow! Ooh!
1872
01:48:11,193 --> 01:48:12,234
Ow!
1873
01:48:14,738 --> 01:48:15,738
Oh!
1874
01:48:15,822 --> 01:48:16,906
Aaah!
1875
01:48:16,907 --> 01:48:18,741
(Speaking Cantonese)
1876
01:48:19,409 --> 01:48:21,410
CHAN: You're supposed
to catch me!
1877
01:48:21,411 --> 01:48:22,786
WANG: Roy, catch.
1878
01:48:24,539 --> 01:48:25,915
(Laughing)
1879
01:48:29,920 --> 01:48:32,171
- Jesus.
- That's my fault.
1880
01:48:32,255 --> 01:48:35,591
Wait a second... This nut...
1881
01:48:35,592 --> 01:48:37,343
(Cell Phone Rings)
1882
01:48:40,347 --> 01:48:41,805
WILSON: Who did that?
1883
01:48:42,265 --> 01:48:43,474
Jackie Chan.
1884
01:48:43,475 --> 01:48:44,600
Me?
1885
01:48:44,601 --> 01:48:45,768
That's right.
1886
01:48:45,769 --> 01:48:46,977
(Laughter)
1887
01:48:46,978 --> 01:48:49,104
First time, first time.
1888
01:48:49,105 --> 01:48:51,148
- The best take.
- I'm sorry.
1889
01:48:51,149 --> 01:48:52,483
Hurry up!
1890
01:48:52,484 --> 01:48:54,276
ROY: Are you crazy?
I can't do that!
1891
01:48:54,361 --> 01:48:56,654
This isn't Chinatown! I
can't sail through the air!
1892
01:48:56,738 --> 01:48:57,905
I'm not gonna break my neck!
1893
01:48:57,906 --> 01:48:58,989
Roy!
1894
01:48:58,990 --> 01:49:00,115
What in our history together
1895
01:49:00,116 --> 01:49:02,826
makes you think I'm capable
of something like that?
1896
01:49:02,827 --> 01:49:03,869
It's getting bigger!
1897
01:49:03,954 --> 01:49:04,995
There's gotta be a better way.
1898
01:49:04,996 --> 01:49:06,080
Roy!
1899
01:49:06,957 --> 01:49:08,040
Roy!
1900
01:49:09,459 --> 01:49:11,168
My ass is on fire.
1901
01:49:15,966 --> 01:49:18,676
(Upbeat Rock Music Plays)
1902
01:49:23,390 --> 01:49:26,350
(Singing) I'm not
content to be with you.
1903
01:49:26,434 --> 01:49:28,227
In the daytime.
1904
01:49:30,564 --> 01:49:33,315
Girl, I want to be with you.
1905
01:49:33,400 --> 01:49:35,317
All of the time.
1906
01:49:37,487 --> 01:49:40,364
The only time I feel all right.
1907
01:49:40,365 --> 01:49:43,325
Is by your si-i-de.
1908
01:49:44,452 --> 01:49:47,246
Girl, I want to be with you.
1909
01:49:47,330 --> 01:49:48,831
All of the time.
1910
01:49:48,832 --> 01:49:51,166
All day and all of the night
1911
01:49:53,169 --> 01:49:55,921
I believe that you and me.
1912
01:49:56,006 --> 01:49:57,965
Last forever.
1913
01:49:59,926 --> 01:50:02,886
Oh, yeah, all day and
nighttime yours.
1914
01:50:02,971 --> 01:50:04,888
Leave me never.
1915
01:50:06,850 --> 01:50:09,852
The only time I feel all right.
1916
01:50:09,936 --> 01:50:12,938
Is by your si-i-de.
1917
01:50:14,024 --> 01:50:16,859
Girl, I want to be with you.
1918
01:50:16,860 --> 01:50:18,360
All of the time.
1919
01:50:18,361 --> 01:50:20,696
All day and all of the night.
1920
01:50:21,615 --> 01:50:23,907
All day and all of the night.
1921
01:50:25,076 --> 01:50:27,369
All day and all of the night
1922
01:50:29,456 --> 01:50:31,415
(Whistling)
1923
01:50:31,416 --> 01:50:33,208
All of the night.
1924
01:50:34,669 --> 01:50:36,211
Oh, come on
1925
01:50:36,546 --> 01:50:38,047
(Guitar Solo)
1926
01:50:50,560 --> 01:50:53,395
The only time I feel all right.
1927
01:50:53,480 --> 01:50:56,440
Is by your si-i-de.
1928
01:50:57,317 --> 01:51:00,277
Girl, I want to be with you.
1929
01:51:00,362 --> 01:51:01,737
All of the time.
1930
01:51:01,821 --> 01:51:04,448
All day and all of the night.
1931
01:51:04,449 --> 01:51:07,284
Girl, I want to be with you.
1932
01:51:07,285 --> 01:51:08,577
All of the time.
1933
01:51:08,578 --> 01:51:11,330
All day and all of the night.
1934
01:51:11,414 --> 01:51:14,249
Girl, I want to be with you.
1935
01:51:14,250 --> 01:51:15,793
All of the time.
1936
01:51:15,794 --> 01:51:18,087
All day and all of the night.
1937
01:51:18,088 --> 01:51:20,631
All day and all of the night.
1938
01:51:20,715 --> 01:51:23,175
All day and all of the night.
1939
01:51:24,219 --> 01:51:26,970
All day and all of the night
1940
01:51:28,098 --> 01:51:29,306
(Music Stops)
1941
01:51:29,391 --> 01:51:31,392
(MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS)
126774
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