Original subtitles

Subtitle: Manvagtoo

Queer! Queer! Queer!

Welcome to another talk from the Alan Watts radio series. Here is Alan Watts.

The physical world is transient.

It's impermanent.

It falls apart.

And bodies that were once strong,

smooth and lovely in youth

begin to wither and become corrupt

and turn at last into skeletons.

To the degree that you identify yourself with the body.

And with the pleasures of the body.

To that degree, you are simply going to be something

that is sucked away

in the course of transiency.

So therefore hold yourself up aloof.

Keep your mind like a mirror.

Pure and clean.

Free from dust, free from flaws, free from stain.

And just reflect everything that goes on.

But don't be attached.

You are a rational soul

in charge of an animal body.

If you belong to the old fashion school

you beat it into the measure.

Fuck.

Fucker!

That's the pole set.

I beat my body...

into submission.

Really...?

Is that good?

Uh..

Yeah.

There goes your B& F. (Boyfriend and Fuck)

Fuck you, man.

Hey!

Is it still a good time?

Yes.

I'm concerned about a student.

Phil Patterson.

Yeah, I know them.

I came across some things that have me worried.

He is struggling to come to terms with his sexuality.

It's obvious from... what he's writing.

I see first-hand how the kids are teasing him.

Well... He is a good kid on paper.

He is on the honor roll.

He's got great grades.

This isn't about his grades.

You need to read some of these.

Look.

I wanna get Phil an appointment to see a school psychologist.

I want him in front of someone who has some experience.

Please. Just call.

Janus.

The Roman God of Beginnings and Endings.

He is two-faced.

One face sees the past.

And the other face sees the future.

I want you to write about an important event

that marked a transition in your life.

You'll need to demonstrate how it was influenced by your past

and how it affected your future.

Ok?

You have forty minutes.

You may begin.

Who is that?

My uncle.

Shab.

You don't have to whisper.

He's pretty out of it.

So... what are we doing here?

Which one is he?

That guy.

He look so young there.

What do you think?

I don't know.

I mean. I would say.

I guess it depends on the guy.

A guy can't really choose who you falling in love with you know.

It kind of just happens.

I mean I've never been in love, but...

Writing the dissertation?

I just want make it good.

So... Have you given any thought to attending that group we talked about?

Uh...yeah.

I don't know.

All right.

They're meeting tonight at six.

If you free I think you really enjoy it.

Ok.

Good.

Wrap up and go home!

Ok.

I wish we give Adam a ride.

Mom! No!

Why not?

Please! We're not friends.

Let's go. Come on.

Hi Adam.

You like a ride?

Ummm...My brother's coming soon.

Ok. Take care of yourself.

Where were you this evening?

Out.

A girl Phil?

No.

Why were you late?

Sit at the park.

Mike lives there you know.

Michael.

Mom's brother.

Do you talk to him.

I think we should move on

with the conversation.

He cannot take care of himself.

We cannot take care of him.

Your mother and I discussed this.

He's right.

We are all...

falling apart

in some way or another.

Especially after you... passed the peak of youth.

The very fact you see that the world is

always decaying and always falling away

is the same thing as its vitality.

Vitality is change. Life is death.

It is always falling apart.

Hey...

What the fuck!

Get off!

When it comes to... love, sexuality...

Timing is the essence.

That's real little bitch.

Don't you keep your head still.

I don't wanna mess it up.

but that's not something that one should look upon with regret.

It only is something regrettable.

If you didn't know how to take it when it was time.

Can you knock, knock?

Because it is after all through sexuality

that we have our most fundamental relationship to nature.

And it is the point at which we can become most attached.

There is no way of making a heads grow

like pruning it.

Why are you wearing lipstick?

It was not me.

Sexuality is something which you cannot get rid off.

Do what you may.

Life... is sexual.

Fucking pissing me off.

He's always staring in.

Are you friends with him?

You really think I'm friends with them?

All right.

Faggot!

Hey Phil.

Oh my God!

Where you going?

Phil!

Hey.

Mike!

Mike

Welcome to another talk from the Alan Watts radio series. Here is Alan Watts.

We get a hangup

on all the various things

that we're told as we grow up,

by our parents, our aunts and uncles,

our teachers.

Above all by our peer group.

A lot of the parent quest for identity

among younger people

is a search for

an acceptable image.

What role can I play?

And the first date

that everybody wants to tell us

is the difference between ourselves

and the rest of the world.

Make sure we get his toothpaste and toothbrush.

The cell phone should be charged too.

Uh...

This guy at school I really liked.

I guess he was afraid of...

you know. Finding out something.

And...

and so he started picking on me

It got pretty bad and uh...

Three years ago, I just felt like...

Everything was...

like nothing was there.

Like there's no hope at all.

So I tried to kill myself.

But I'm climbing back up from that hole.

And it's good you know that I'm not alone.

I can never get to look at me.

The real me.

It's always behind.

It's always hidden.

And so... if you are perfectly honest about loving yourself.

And you don't pull any punches.

You don't pretend that you were

anything other than exactly what you are.

If you can do that, you have no further problem.