Original subtitles

And they are off!

RICHARD: This time... Blimey, this could be serious.

..my team hit the track.

Try not to kill each other. Oh-hoo!

Massive slide.

You have no idea what's happening down there.

Kamla makes me brush up on my management skills...

"Starting a business."

(SIGHS)

..and there are tense times... Have I got time for a nervous poo?

(HORN HONKS)

..as Anthony debuts our race car.

Oh!

Did you call him "Tiger Tim?" Is it Tiger...?

It's "Tony the Tiger." Tony.

Oh, silly sod!

(LAUGHING)

You got his nickname wrong.

Fire them up, let's go!

I've fulfilled a lifelong dream.

This all yours? It's all ours.

I've set up a classic car restoration business

with automotive wonder family, Neil, Anthony, and Andrew Greenhouse...

ANTHONY: Dad!

..but it's become a money pit.

Bad, bad, bad. And if we don't break even soon...

Ten. But the budget's ten. ..there's a chance we may go bust.

Not going well at all to be fair.

So, I've come up with ambitious new plans.

Welcome to your club.

Gotta push forward into the big league.

(HORN HONKS)

We're even going racing to find cars that need our help.

Now wouldn't be the time to give him a business card.

I'm determined to turn my lifelong obsession...

Come on, little car.

..into a thriving business.

Will it turn over? No.

(LAUGHING)

Isn't this a good idea?

(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)

Ah!

Binoculars.

Oh, I'm using these today professionally in my capacity

as team boss of The Smallest Cog race team,

because, well, we've now had

our first experience of classic car racing

at Goodwood last week and learnt a lot.

From the number of just crashes, scrapes, little dings,

we could have fixed them all.

And once the people there know and trust us,

they can use us to fix them. It will drum up business

and to make that happen, we need to work well as a team.

We need a good car with a good engine.

But we also need a good driver.

That's where these'll come in.

Thing is, race drivers cost money which we don't have,

and I'm not gonna do it because I really wanna try being a Team Boss.

I wanna find out if there's anyone else in our midst

who might be a bit handy behind the wheel.

And that's why I've organised a Cog day out,

but it's a day out with a purpose.

This is grassroots racing. This is where the great star,

Lewis Hamilton began in one of these.

So, this will give us an opportunity to see what we've got.

Is there a star racer amongst us?

NEIL: Fat and Furious have arrived.

ANTHONY: This is gonna be awesome.

NEIL: Ready for this? ANDREW: Not really.

It'll be like mowing the grass, won't it, but not quite.

ANDREW: I'm buzzing for a go.

You'll notice there's four karts because the fourth contender,

my eldest daughter, Izzy,

she's quite a neat driver and has expressed an interest.

So, she's agreed to come along and give it a shot.

Never raced before at all.

Also, I shall be joined by my old mate, Zog as my director,

PR global,

somewhat self-appointed to that higher level.

Between us, if there's talent out there, we will see.

ZOG: Two engines.

Blimey, this could be serious.

That is what we've got to work with.

ZOG: Oh, my word!

What a heroic bunch of throttle jockeys...

(BOTH LAUGHING)

..we've got ourselves here.

Right. I need to explain to you the shape of today

and how it's gonna work.

At stake, obviously,

is the potential for a seat in our race car. This is important.

You're gonna have five practice laps all on the track at the same time,

and your fastest lap counts as your qualifying lap

that will establish your grid position

for the actual race.

Got it? Got it.

Try not to kill each other.

That's quite important. Can't promise, but, yeah.

Gentlemen, ladies, it's almost time to start your engines.

Oh-ho-ho-ho! Yeah, you said it.

(ALL LAUGHING)

ANTHONY: Haven't done this since me last bank robbery.

The chaps from the Smallest Cog,

I mean, they're talented lads and they're fine chaps indeed,

but they're not exactly lightweights.

And we've also, of course, got Richard's daughter, Izzy.

So, it'd be very, very interesting to see whether little Izzy can beat

the horny handed sons of the hammer and spanner.

First one's out on track.

ZOG: This is gonna make me dizzy.

Yeah, it will do that.

Izzy's holding up the pack somewhat. ZOG: Good girl.

IZZY: Oh!

I heard her shout then.

I think Andrew is trying to get past Neil and yeah, he's just rammed him.

They are racing already.

I think we need to give Izzy some advice.

Oh!

That was a hell of an overtake then.

ZOG: Izzy's going, giving it a bit more.

Oh, the barrier. Oh, she spun.

Woo-hoo! It does require some commitment there, doesn't it?

ZOG: Yeah.

Anthony's quick.

ANDREW: There's gotta be points for style.

NEIL: I only had one engine running!

Any feedback from anybody?

Could do with a few more horsepower. That's all you're getting.

Or you could go to the gym.

Don't wanna do that.

(LAUGHING)

OK.

Neil, your fastest lap was 36.9.

Andrew, your fastest was 36.3.

Anthony, 34.8. Perfect.

The biggest improvement was actually Izzy,

who we should stress has never been on a racetrack before.

You did a not entirely brisk 49. That's under a minute.

I'm taking that. But you took that down to 43. That's a huge difference.

So, you knocked off a full six seconds.

ANTHONY: Well done!

If you improved by that much again...

Yeah ..you'd be in with these.

OK. I feel like I'm driving a lawn mower.

First time you've ever been on the track.

Yeah, it's quite difficult. Yeah.

The whole left/right braking thing is very strange.

That takes some getting used to

because you're balancing throttle and brake.

Also, my mascara's running and that's...

(LAUGHING)

..distracting me. Right.

Yeah, that's not helping the cause of women in racing.

No. Sorry. OK. Forget that. Forget that.

That concludes practice.

I think you can have a break. Stretch your legs.

Focus your mind.

Hydrate.

Have a pee.

Have a number two and you might go even quicker.

(LAUGHING)

I think Anthony is turning out to be pretty good at this

and chatting to the guys at the track, respectable times.

He's good at this.

Could be a secret weapon.

So, now we will have an actual race.

It'll be ten laps.

Anthony you start up front, then Andrew, then Neil, then Izzy.

Have fun. Enjoy it. For God's sake, nobody injure themselves

because you won't get any paid time off work.

I'm just saying cos we need stuff doing. Good luck.

2 00:08:35.000 -- 00:08:36.920 align:middle line:90% position:50% And they are off.

(ENGINES REVVING)

ZOG: Oh!

It's not a contact sport, lads!

Anthony has past Izzy.

This is where she can learn.

Yeah. If she follows his lines, even only briefly, she'll improve.

ZOG: Ah, that's it.

So, that's a finish for Anthony.

Well, we have found a star. I'm really impressed.

We have obviously, a clear winner of the race.

Well done, that was really well deserved. Good job.

I think what that does mean is, Anthony, you should have

some testing in the car

that's the next thing to have a go at.

Let's get your backside in the MGB,

see what you can do. ANTHONY: To a gym.

Yeah, I wasn't going to say anything, but-

He won't need a gym after driving the MGB. Maybe.

But there's something to go for there.

Get you in the big car and give it a shot. Let's do it.

I'm so glad nobody's hurt!

I have a feeling my relief might be short-lived.

This afternoon accountant, Kamla's coming in

and she's going to be on my case about the Alvis,

a rare British classic belonging to one of Neil's oldest customers,

I'd originally hoped it would be done in six weeks...

Look at the (INDISTINCT) on it.

..but it's now been three months.

ANDREW: Oh, I can see what the problem is now.

This bit of metal here, it's a bit too curved,

I need to just flatten it out a bit.

Chaps.

Hello. Alvis is still very much in the building.

He's in the building all right.

We've managed to get our A-post done.

We're disassembling this door, try and get this door to fit

back in the hole cos it doesn't fit.

Problem is, if it was a normal everyday car that was steel,

you could jack it, move it back. But it's wood.

So, realistically, how long before Alvis leaves the building?

If we don't get any more delays or hold ups

and we could get on with it,

I would say four to six weeks.

Oh, God! I think it could be eight weeks.

Yeah. It's a lotta work mind.

Yeah, hello, Kamla.

Hi, Richard. Hi, how are you?

Hello. Are you OK? Very well indeed.

Jolly good. Have a seat.

Thank you, sir. Now we can catch up. Oh!

Liking your sign. Yeah, I know. Is it new?

It's pretty grown up, isn't it?

I know what it says.

But is that to remind you you're at Hammond HQ?

Give it here. That's my important thing.

It's very nice. So, yes, yeah.

Right. OK. Would you mind give me an update on the Alvis?

Where are we now?

Are we a point where we can start invoicing for that?

Is that ready to collected?

Can I invoice?

Neil reckons six, and Andrew reckons eight weeks.

In reality, we're talking, it's another two months

before you're planning on invoicing,

and maybe another two weeks before it's paid.

Are we in a position we can invoice to date,

hours and materials to date?

Not at the moment. But why is that then?

Cos I told him he could pay at the end.

Pardon? I told him he could pay at the end.

But Richard, no, we can't, these are all long-term jobs.

So, how many months have we had the Alvis?

Many.

We can't bill at the end. No.

Which actually brings me on to logging the hours.

How are we logging the hours, the lads are working on the vehicles

to ensure that we're invoicing for everything.

You don't know? You have no idea.

You have no idea what's happening down there.

So, how can you run a business like this?

I need to take control of certainly that issue more.

You do. You need to rein it all in and have some ground rules.

I need to just...

..be a boss.

Without fail, one thing that needs to happen,

invoicing on a monthly basis.

But to do that, we need the lads to log their hours.

So, invoice monthly...

Get the hours logged, get to break-even.

Yeah. Plan.

I have to learn how to be a boss.

Never really been a boss.

I hate desks, I hate offices, I hate files.

I'm going to go home this evening and I'm going to a big think.

(SIGHS)

Right. What I am is off to the workshop.

You know, how you tend to ask me about...

"How's it going? How are you making it work?"

Right.

Truth is, it's not working.

So, hang on. So, how far is work booked in?

Literally, it's one job at a time. There's not a booking system?

Not really.

In fact not.

No. I've got a solution to this.

I'm gonna do it. Yeah, but with the best will in the world,

but you're not able to keep on top. I'm going to have to. But, you won't.

You have absolutely no faith in my ability to do that.

None. I mean not even...

How many times has your post gone

for weeks of driving experiences in your cars

before it's got into a post box?

And that stuff that you actually have done something with

ready to put in the post box.

I'm more of a doer than a filer.

You're not a doer or a filer when it comes to paperwork.

I turned over a new leaf with this? What if?

What if doing this... No, bear with me.

What if doing this meant that, I became an ordered, organised,

methodical- How old are you now, Richard?

52.

Time to change.

Right. OK. I'm gonna go and do all of that.

OK. All right. Thank you.

Bye! Bye!

(DOOR CLOSES)

What I hold in my hands is

a brand new, organised, sleek, streamlined future.

This is a day I never saw coming in my life...

..books on business,

"Bluffers Guide to Management,

Starting a Business,

Starting a Successful Business."

I'd rather start a successful one.

So, let's have a look.

Oh, God!

Right.

"People use the words, "First mover advantage"

like a mantra to justify a headlong rush into starting a business

without doing enough basic research."

I have never and shall never use the words,

"First mover advantage."

If I do...

please, with my blessing, stab me in the throat with a spoon.

Oh!

No disrespect to the business tomes I've been reading,

but I don't think I'm gonna find the answer to my problems

there in those books.

I need to talk to somebody who works in something like a similar business

who's got real hands on, basically, I'm talking about Hadrian,

so I'm going to his place.

Right, where is he?

Hello? HADRIAN: Ha, ha!

All right, mate? Yeah, not bad. Do you feel cooler in here?

Yes. Yeah, I've had AC put in.

Is that where my rent money goes?

That was last month's.

(LAUGHS)

HADRIAN: What's up?

The problem I've got, I'd like to know how you resolve this.

Cos you've got how many people working here?

There's 11 over here. Right.

And their hours have to be charged for.

Yeah.

How the hell do you keep track of the hours?

With this.

Every day, every person has to fill in a job sheet.

Do they do it? Yeah.

Mate, how do you make them do it?

How? I install fear.

Those guys are my mates. I mean, I knew them before the business.

You'll have heard it before. There's no friends in business.

How do I say to Neil, who I respect,

"Neil, fill in these timesheets

or something bad is gonna happen?"

Well, sow the seed that he comes up with it.

Pull him into the office and see if he comes up with the idea.

OK.

You sound better than one of those business books.

Cogs assemble!

ANTHONY: I hate it when he does that.

I think they hate it when I do that.

Chaps would you mind coming up and we can have a bit of a convo?

Bring your dog.

ANDREW: Stairs could do with an hoover, couldn't they?

ANDREW: It's like being back at school.

Oh, come on. ANDREW: Headmaster's office and all that.

No, it's not that. we need to have a convo.

So...

Jobs seem to fall into two categories.

As you all know, we've got the longer term restoration jobs,

Alvis,

and the shorter turnaround jobs that come in and go out.

So, let's take them one by one. In terms of the Alvis,

where are we with hours in it so far?

I don't know, I would say we're probably into it,

me and you, we're into it for at least 100 hours I would say.

But have we got those noted?

Have you got it noted in that book? Have I got it noted in that book?

It's going to be a no, isn't it?

So, truth of the matter is, on the Alvis,

we really don't know how many hours have been spent on it so far.

We're a bit in the dark.

ANDREW: We used to do daily worksheets, so...

You all have a daily worksheet, put your hours in

that you do on that day, a rough thing, you've done.

So, on a daily worksheet, it's literally, name, job, hours

and tasks and we don't do that, so, let's do it. OK.

I'll print up some of those new job sheets that are for you

if you're all happy with it and there's going to be no moaning.

How's Ellie gonna fill hers in?

Take your dog and off, yes.

Right.

Next on the management agenda is to get us some more work

and I've had a call about a possible job.

I've gotta go and do these trips

because I've been an hour driving here,

maybe an hour, it'll be three hours,

it's half a day. I can't send the guys out to do this.

That's half a day they could be working on a car

that we can charge for.

The fact I'm gonna be looking at a Porsche 911

which happens to be one of my favourite cars,

well, that's just a welcome bonus.

ANDREW: Hello. Hello.Richard.

Nice to see you, how are you? All right.

Very well. Can I come in? Oh! Please. There it is.

That clearly is it. Be kind.

It's in bits, mate. Quick polish, be all right.

How did you come to have it? eBay.

Say no more. Yeah.

I thought, "Yeah, you know, interior looks a bit shabby,

tears on the seats and, yeah, I'll get my spanner out and..."

Right. You did this. Yes.

Right. So, what do you want doing?

Complete bare metal as how you would prep the exterior.

That's how I'd expect the interior to be.

So, every little nook and cranny filled, body filled,

sprayed, smoothed,

making it look like, sort of like a retro Le Mans

sort of race car-inspired.

So, a bit like a race car for the road. Exactly.

I love it. And I couldn't agree more if it were mine,

that's what I'd do with this car.

I need to take some photographs of this to take back to the chaps.

(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)

That would be a cracking job, don't know how the lads are gonna feel

cos they're not the easiest cars to work on.

I like Andrew's vision for it. I totally share it.

The stripped out interior. I get it.

I hope he realises that, that's gonna cost.

If you're gonna see all that interior metal,

you've gotta finish it as well as the exterior

you've doubled the cost.

As far as he wants to get it without the engine done,

15 to 20, I think is what I would expect it to cost.

(HORN HONKS)

I've got the Porsche in.

I've quoted him 20.

He knows it could rise a little over that

and I have decided we're gonna use it as a benchmark.

Let's log the hours properly,

add them up and make sure we make a profit on the job.

Do some managerial mathematics.

Now, I've said about 20 grand...

..three and a half grand

of which could be stripping the paint off at the paint strippers,

having it dipped. Let's allow five grand in parts and stuff.

So, that gives me 15,000 divided by £65 an hour equals,

they've got a maximum of 230 hours.

Beyond that, it starts costing us money or the quote goes up.

Do I write 230 down?

I think I should be honest with them.

So, I'm gonna lie and say 210.

Right.

(CELLPHONE RINGS)

Oh, God, Ziegler!

(SIGHS)

Hello, Richard. Hello.

What can I do for you?

Well, sorry to be a nuisance

and not making an appointment before I ring you.

(LAUGHS)

These dear old chaps have asked me

to host a classic car event for Prescott.

I suggested, without consulting you, I said possibly we could get,

you know, the Smallest Cog guys along,

including Richard Hammond, to show off their new race car.

I thought it would be a good place for you to be seen.

It's quite smart actually.

they get to see the car in action, have a look at the car

and we get to hand some business cards out. I like it. When is it?

A bit of short notice, I'm afraid.

This weekend.

(STUTTERS)

Yes. Listen,

you like living on a giant razor blade

using your balls as brakes.

(LAUGHING)

Right. Thank you. That's a good opportunity.

That's great.

Oh, God!

What that is, is not long enough.

Oh!

The troops must know.

Right.

It's a brilliant idea. They're gonna love it.

They're gonna be all... Oh!

(DOORKNOB RATTLING)

Bugger.

Oh!

Right.

Cogs assemble!

ANDREW: Oh. Two things.

Look, it's our illustrious leader.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Two things.

One...

I've got something, need to talk to you about.

Can we do it up here? We're getting the sack.

No. You've ironed your shirt.

No. Can we talk about it up here?

Because, I'll be honest,

the handle's come off my door, I can't get out. Hooray!

(LAUGHING)

You're all really funny, but I can't get out.

Is that anger that done that?

No! That's rather undermined my gravitas and dignity

at an important moment. Oh, bloody hell.

Come on. There you go, son.

I didn't do it. It happened.

It wasn't something I did, came off.

Have a seat. Thank you.

Some of those hours we've been talking about.

No. You can't log this one. Right, you know Zog. Yeah.

He has rather smartly got us an opportunity

to run our car up the hill at Prescott Hill Climb. Oh.

It's a sort of display event.

There'll be lots of classic cars there, a good one to be at.

Good one to launch the race car at. That's what he's told me.

He does the commentary.

Does he? Yeah. He's the man for that job, isn't he?

That is a launch, it gets the car seen. Good idea.

And what if you were to drive it as a first experience

in front of a load of people?

There'll be a crowd there... I would love the opportunity.

An advert. By the time they do that

the weather should be quite warm, be mid-summer.

It's an interesting point, timing

I think you can probably see where this is going.

Yeah, I'm a bit scared. Yeah.

What have you promised this time, Rich?

It's on Sunday. It's Thursday now.

The car's racing on the Sunday?

Not racing. Driving up the hill in a spirited fashion.

Like a demonstration.

That's exactly what it is, it's a demonstration run.

(LAUGHING)

Right. OK, team. That's good isn't it? It's a plan.

All right. Lunchtime now.

Whoa, wait a minute. See ya, Rich.

Don't close the door.

There is one other minor obstacle standing between us and Prescott.

I haven't got the engine.

The engine is off at Ric Woods being rebuilt.

So, I'm gonna call Ric just to find out...

..well, I don't know, probably to make him quite cross.

RIC: Hello?

Ric. It's Richard Hammond. Richard, how are you?

Mate, well, I don't know where to start on this conversation.

What's happened is, oh, God.

My oldest friend, a guy called Zog Ziegler, a motoring journalist

of some repute has taken it upon himself to confirm for us a slot

to drive up the hill at Prescott.

But it hasn't got an engine on account of you've got it.

RIC: Yes.

Where are we with it? Let's talk about that first.

The engine's sort of coming together now.

The head's coming together, all the bits are coming in.

We can get it back to you,

but your lads have got a tall order getting in and running

in that short timeframe.

You're just lining yourself up for a load of hassle.

But, you know. I'm up for it.

You're a stalwart hero.

You're welcome. Thank you, mate.

Talk to you in a bit. All right? Cheers, mate. Bye.

Thing is, until the engine's back,

there's only so much the lads can do.

ANTHONY: The biggest factor in this is time

and we're running out of time massively.

Why is it always, like the last minute?

2 00:29:17.280 -- 00:29:21.520 align:middle line:90% position:50% To my eternal gratitude Ric's team have pulled out all the stops

and this morning we have a delivery.

Hello. Hello.

You have our engine? I have an engine.

There is the engine.

Shiny.

Oh, I can't wait. I'm well excited for this.

It's like Christmas isn't it, and I get to use it.

So, plan now.

Simply whip it around there.

Lower it down there and zip it back in.

(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Ooh! Like that?

ANDREW: Have you got all your fingers still?

I dare not count! You survived, didn't you?

Shut up!

A reminder to all,

we have a day before this goes up the hill on a demonstration run

in front of eager spectators.

Million people. Not a million, but it will feel like it.

(HAMMERING)

I've seen more use of a lump hammer than I've seen in an F1 garage.

Pass me that screwdriver there.

If you're gonna stick it in my neck. No. He wouldn't use a stumpy one.

(CHUCKLES)

A bit worrying if it was a race day,

had to do a quick engine change.

A quick engine change?

Are we having a spare engine?

All right, we clear?

Clear.

Obviously then, what we're hoping is this engine does work,

cos this hasn't been a cheap exercise thus far.

No. No, this is a significant moment.

This is our biggest ever piece of advertising if it works.

(ENGINE STARTING)

It lives!

Lumpy idle.

That's the first evidence

that this car has been changed from a pottering about car.

This is now more single-minded.

It doesn't wanna sit at idle. It's not happy. She wants to go.

She looks the business, sounds the business.

ANTHONY: It's an animal.

Oh, it does sound angry.

Oh-ho!

Yeah, it's a beast.

That's exactly what you want it to sound like.

Yeah. Yeah.

That's genius. Well done. You've gotta be a bit proud.

It sounds nice, sounds lovely.

I mean, now we've built a race car. Yeah.

Prescott, here we come.

(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)

It's race day.

This is exciting.

They're driving here in the truck with the car, which is finished.

Everything's great apart from one detail.

I've lost the keys to the van.

Oh, God!

Right. I came home.

I was carrying all my stuff.

Willow was there.

I said, "Hi! Oh, it's still quite a nice evening."

(BOTTLES CLINKING)

There are some beer bottles there,

that is part, I suspect of the problem.

I'm gonna have to go and search...

I was wearing shorts. Yes. Shorts.

They're in the house.

Ah!

Oh!

I put my other jeans in the wash. I didn't wash them, I...

Oh!

Scratched a little bit of dignity back.

ZOG: Hello. Good morning, everybody.

Welcome to the Emerald Hill.

I'm Zog Ziegler.

I have been doing the commentary for this event for a few years now

and today's going to be slightly different

because my little friend, Richard Hammond is coming up shortly

with his new racing car, an MG.

I just thought, what an idea it would be

if we could get Richard up here to introduce his new racing car?

It'll be the car's debut.

It's really rather exciting.

Probably a bit of the commentary that I will enjoy doing,

especially, if he makes a Horlicks of it.

(ENGINE REVVING)

ANDREW: Don't she look grand?

There's my mum and dad. Hello.

Did you drive it down?

I drove it down here, but I'm not driving.

No, yeah.

Is this this first time you've seen the car? It is.

It is. It looks brilliant. I've got a race team.

You know, what it reminds me of?

The very first car you had. Shortly before I crashed it.

That's right. Yeah, exactly.

ANTHONY: Oh, here's the man. ALL: Ah!

ZOG: Ah! There he is.

Hello. We're here. With car. I know.

Meet, "Tony the Tiger." NEIL: "Big Tony."

He races under the name, "Tony the Tiger."

"Tony the Tiger." Rawr!

You have to do that after you've said it.

Oh. "Tony the Tiger." Rawr! Yeah.

Have you ever driven this hill? No, sir.

Are you nervous? Slightly.

This is not against the clock.

If it was, everyone would have to wear a helmet

and we'd need extra marshals,

extra ambulances and all that. Why did you look at me

when you say ambulances?

(ALL LAUGHING)

Well, cos every time I see an ambulance, I think of you.

Right. Let's do this! All right. Tiger.

Zog! Rawr!

(LAUGHING)

Keep the car the right way up here.

That's good. Don't clip this stuff.

You look at all the marks on the Armco,

you'll see where not to go.

ANTHONY: I'm not gonna lie. This is starting to feel real.

Look at the skid marks. Going straight on there, look.

Yeah. Somebody got that wrong. So, somebody's gone too quick...

and gone straight into the gravel trap.

ANTHONY: To be honest, it's a build-up.

I've been busy thinking about the car,

But now, I stood here on the tarmac of Prescott...

You'll be coming here again only in the car.

Yeah, next time I come up here will be in the MG.

Hey, look, it's not timed.

Don't bin it. But don't make us look wet either.

They wanna see the car, but they wanna see it looking heroic.

Yep. Enjoy yourself.

Feeling good? I'm rather scared right now.

I'm not gonna lie. Do it for the Cog.

Have I got time for a nervous poo?

There's a portaloo over there.

Oh, I wish I'd seen that before.

Come on, Anthony. Go steady boy.

He's nervous.

NEIL: Anthony used to go karting a couple of times when he was a kid

It was a big special treat, but he couldn't afford to do it.

When he did go, he was really good at driving

and he never had the opportunity to go any further.

But now, hopefully, he's got an opportunity to shine a bit.

I'm really happy for him.

Right decision to let him go, show what he can do.

Oh, there he is, look, look at his little face.

NEIL: Come on! Bless him! ANDREW: Ah! Oh, they got the lights.

ZOG: And the Cog. This is the debut of The Smallest Cog's racing car.

I can hear Zog going on.

ZOG: Tiger Tim at the wheel, Anthony Greenhouse.

I think he just called him, "Tiger Tim."

"Tiger Tim?"

ZOG: Here we are.

The moment of truth, the white MG is almost go.

I'm nervous. No pressure. NEIL: Oh! Oh!

ZOG: Everybody go, "Rawr!"

(ENGINE REVVING)

That was more than five and a half thousand RPM.

Oh, he went too wide there.

That was a weird line, went out too far.

He should've been this side.

Did you call him "Tiger Tim?" Is it Tiger...

It's "Tony the Tiger." Silly sod! I thought you did.

(LAUGHING)

You got his nickname wrong.

It's "Tony the Tiger." I'll correct it on the next run.

Tony the... "Tony the Tiger." Rawr!

Rawr! Yeah.

He did all right. He made it. He hasn't binned it. Yes.

Good thing is, I haven't brought you here

to see my race car fall apart.

Right, let's welcome him back in.

(APPLAUSE)

Oh, smells a bit clutch-y.

That is a bit of clutch, isn't it? ANDREW: Yeah.

You been riding the clutch there, boy?

How was that? Better.

What can you tell us about the car?

ANTHONY: Understeer is unbelievable. Understeer?

It's very slippy. I'm not sure if it's the road tyres.

If had proper tyres on it, she'd be a lot better.

Are you going again then? I'm going again now.

Oh, no stopping you now, is there.

Rawr! See you later!

Where are you most likely to nearly, but not quite, crash?

The first hairpin's probably the worst.

Right. We'll go there.

He's gone from, "Uh! Mr. Nervous" to "King of the Hill," hasn't he,

in about 30 seconds.

Yeah, it does do that to you.

Remember, it's other people's cars we wanna repair, not our own.

You bend it, you mend it. Deal. Now send it.

Oh.

Still works.

(LAUGHING)

ZOG: I did Richard's driver a disservice

by calling him "Tiger Tim."

It's actually "Tony the Tiger." And he's in the line again.

And after you say, "Tony the Tiger", I am obliged to go, "Rawr!"

(ALL LAUGHING)

I have to do that. It's part of my contract.

It's really rather demeaning, but...

Rawr!

Rawr! Brilliant. He is brilliant, isn't he?

NEIL: Here he comes. Come on Tony the Tiger! He's wriggling on.

He's having a go. He's giving it some.

Oh, he's a bit on off the foreleg.

Steady, steady.

Yeah.

He's being very sensible. Oh!

Bless him. Steady, son.

Crackle and bang on the overrun. And only one brake light working.

ANDREW: Look, he got round there real sweet.

ALL: Oh!

Don't she look nice going through the wood there?

NEIL: He's living the dream there.

ANDREW: And he's done it.

He's across the line without crashing.

I think Anthony's done well.

He's not driven, with a load of people watching him before.

that in itself is enough of a...

I think it's done his confidence a world of good.

Really brought him out of his shell. That's good.

We can put him back in it next week.

Quite easily.

I was proud of him the way he chucked the car,

he got the lines right and I'm so proud.

I'm just really happy for him.

I'm really happy for him cos he deserves to do it.

So, what have we learned?

Do that, do that. I've learnt I like hill climbing.

ANDREW: Do you like it? Yeah!

(ALL LAUGHING)

Feeling the pressure. The shakes.

So? I noticed one thing.

Going up to the left-hand hairpin, the second one,

there was a loud bang on the driver's side.

You're worried about down here?

Can you turn the wheel? I'll jump under the front.

What could that be?

ANTHONY: I wonder if I bottomed out?

ANDREW: Give it a bit of a rock.

NEIL: I think it might be the rack end. Yeah.

It sounds there.

We changed the angle.

NEIL: Because we lowered the suspension,

that end of the arm has gone like that.

So, the next purchase will be steering rack, a gear box.

And a differential.

Yeah, and...

What did she sound like coming off the line? Lovely.

Yeah. cos it's loud in there. Only thing she does is,

when you come to the start line, sat for a bit, takes a bit to build up.

If you think about it, comes into it's peak rev range about 3,000,

anything below that she's real lumpy.

So, she's sucking loads of fuel in not burning it.

So, we could take home, one, you didn't go, "Ah!" Fall apart...

Yep. ..you stood the pressure.

Two, address the steering rack issues.

Let's look at tyres and look at the gearbox.

ANTHONY: Today's been a very successful day.

I'm well chuffed with that. Well done all. Thank you.

That was a genuinely a useful day.

It was a shakedown not with the car, it was a shakedown for Anthony,

he's driven in front of a crowd for the first time.

we did learn genuine stuff that we've gotta sort out on the car,

which wouldn't have known if we hadn't done today,

so that was worthwhile and fun.

So, today, actually has been one of the scariest days of my life.

But to be honest, it's been, I'd say,

the best thing I've ever done.

And like, not being funny like, that experience at Prescott,

I can't thank Richard enough for giving me that chance

to show that I can do it. I am absolutely buzzing for this.

So, bring on 2022 Cog Race Team, I say.

This is really bad.

Bad, bad, bad.

He's definitely got a gun.

NEIL: It looks like a gun.

It is a gun. The winner takes all.

House, grounds... Workshop. Wait a minute!

This is high end,

you don't get much better than this. Sky's the limit, isn't it?