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THUNDER RUMBLES
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WIND HOWLS
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Are you all right?
4
00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:18,079
Yeah. Just thinking about Worzel.
5
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Wish he'd agreed to spend
the night in the barn.
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Oh, he's a scarecrow, he's seen
more thunderstorms than you've had
7
00:01:24,360 --> 00:01:27,399
hot dinners, and you know he
wouldn't feel comfortable spending
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the night with a roof over his head,
even a leaky one.
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What if he got struck by lightning?
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Are you joking?
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He'd love that -
we'd never hear the end of it!
12
00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:40,280
THUNDER CLAPS
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DOOR OPENS
14
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All right, kids?
15
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Now, Reenie said
I should come and check on you,
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said you might be scared
with the storm.
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00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:52,920
Oh, right. Thanks.
18
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Are you...scared of the storm?
19
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Not really.
20
00:01:58,400 --> 00:02:02,079
No? Do you want me to stay
and read you a story?
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00:02:02,080 --> 00:02:04,040
No, we're fine, thanks.
22
00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:07,119
Cup of cocoa?
23
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No, thanks.
24
00:02:09,320 --> 00:02:10,360
Right.
25
00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:13,640
I might go and make myself one.
26
00:02:15,560 --> 00:02:16,599
Mr B?
27
00:02:16,600 --> 00:02:17,640
Yeah?
28
00:02:19,200 --> 00:02:20,999
Are you scared of the storm?
29
00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:23,880
Me? No, no!
30
00:02:24,920 --> 00:02:26,440
Well, maybe just a little bit.
31
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Night.
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HE CACKLES
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Gold is a storm!
34
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This is just a light shower!
35
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HE CACKLES
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This is just drizzle,
that's all this is.
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You can do better than that. Boo!
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HE CACKLES, THUNDER BOOMS
39
00:02:58,560 --> 00:03:00,280
That's more like it!
40
00:03:28,560 --> 00:03:31,079
How do, Winter George?
Rough night, huh?
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You find somewhere safe to shelter?
42
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What you got there?
WINTER GEORGE TWEETS
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It can't be, can it?
You're pulling my leg!
44
00:03:45,760 --> 00:03:49,760
Muddy boots, I think you're right!
We need some binoculars.
45
00:03:55,680 --> 00:03:57,600
COCKEREL CROWS
46
00:04:09,760 --> 00:04:14,799
But they've already got slugs
in their kitchen cos, well...
47
00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:17,519
Well, they come
under the door at night,
48
00:04:17,520 --> 00:04:21,199
and then they leave all
these silvery trails
49
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all over the floor and up the wall.
50
00:04:24,160 --> 00:04:27,999
Well, it's just a problem, isn't it,
really? And I hate slugs!
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00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:30,039
Some mornings,
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she swears they've written
messages for her!
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SHE LAUGHS
54
00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:37,000
She swears!
55
00:04:39,840 --> 00:04:41,879
What you need, when
it's raining, really,
56
00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:44,960
is a hedgehog or a toad or...
57
00:04:50,520 --> 00:04:52,599
..get rid of it, really.
58
00:04:52,600 --> 00:04:55,520
It's just one of them problems,
though, isn't it? Oh!
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00:04:56,520 --> 00:04:58,800
Anyway, get this washing out.
60
00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:04,040
Oh, it's coming out.
HE MOUTHS
61
00:05:08,680 --> 00:05:12,119
Oh! Oh, it looks nice now,
doesn't it?
62
00:05:12,120 --> 00:05:14,600
But I'd put your wellies on,
if you want to go out.
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00:05:28,240 --> 00:05:29,960
BOTTLES SMASH
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00:05:37,760 --> 00:05:39,240
SHE SIGHS
65
00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:43,760
Oh, bloomin' cat!
66
00:06:04,760 --> 00:06:06,279
HE WHISTLES
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00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:08,159
That weren't me
what broke them bottles.
68
00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:09,279
Yes, it was.
69
00:06:09,280 --> 00:06:10,599
I never touched 'em!
70
00:06:10,600 --> 00:06:11,919
Yes, you did.
71
00:06:11,920 --> 00:06:15,519
I hope somebody swept up those bits
of broken glass, could be dangerous.
72
00:06:15,520 --> 00:06:16,679
How do, chillens?
73
00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:18,599
How do, scarecrow? Lovely day.
74
00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:22,319
Ain't it just? Here, smashing storm
last night. Did you see it?
75
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Kept me awake.
76
00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:25,359
Did you bring your
magical eye tubes?
77
00:06:25,360 --> 00:06:28,079
Yeah, here. But why do you need
them? What's so urgent?
78
00:06:28,080 --> 00:06:29,120
Here.
79
00:06:30,280 --> 00:06:32,639
You know what this is from? A crow?
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00:06:32,640 --> 00:06:35,360
It is and it isn't.
Here, I'll show you.
81
00:06:39,240 --> 00:06:40,919
Whoa! What's that?
82
00:06:40,920 --> 00:06:43,960
This? This is my scarecrow handbook.
83
00:06:45,080 --> 00:06:48,719
All scarecrows are issued one
when they graduate. The trick is
84
00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:50,840
to add to it things that
you learn as you go.
85
00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:54,160
So, quick lesson in crows.
86
00:06:55,600 --> 00:06:58,559
You've got your common crows,
your rooks, your ravens,
87
00:06:58,560 --> 00:07:02,279
you've got your Jackie Ds,
your Maggie Ps and your jay birds.
88
00:07:02,280 --> 00:07:07,560
But the rarest crow of all, seaside
bird - hardly never seen in land.
89
00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:10,520
The chough.
90
00:07:11,560 --> 00:07:15,719
Glossy black plumage,
bright red legs and beak.
91
00:07:15,720 --> 00:07:17,879
They are utterly ludicrous.
92
00:07:17,880 --> 00:07:20,959
Amazing! What? I think
they look amazing!
93
00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:25,319
Stupid, more like. Look at it -
looks like it's wearing tights!
94
00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:28,359
But that's what that's from,
I'd stake my stake on it.
95
00:07:28,360 --> 00:07:30,319
Well, it must have been
blown here by the storm.
96
00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:33,839
Just the feather or the whole bird?
Because, you see,
97
00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:36,239
to scare a chough, for a scarecrow,
98
00:07:36,240 --> 00:07:40,039
well, it'll go down
in scarecrow lore.
99
00:07:40,040 --> 00:07:44,359
Oh! How do, pal?
What did you find out?
100
00:07:44,360 --> 00:07:45,519
WINTER GEORGE CHIRPS
101
00:07:45,520 --> 00:07:46,919
Yeah?
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00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:49,319
Told you - a whole flock of 'em,
103
00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:51,919
a clattering of choughs
up on Home Farm.
104
00:07:51,920 --> 00:07:53,200
Let's get over there now.
105
00:07:56,680 --> 00:07:59,239
Windy old weather
106
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Stormy old weather
107
00:08:02,280 --> 00:08:04,639
When the wind blows
108
00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:07,880
We'll all pull together.
109
00:08:21,520 --> 00:08:22,560
There!
110
00:08:40,560 --> 00:08:41,960
Here, have a look up there.
111
00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:46,279
Winter George said they'd
be up the top end.
112
00:08:46,280 --> 00:08:47,840
Oh, there! Is that them?
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There they are. One,
two, three, four...
114
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Must be half a baker's
dozen of them. Idiots!
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00:08:59,560 --> 00:09:03,559
What are you waiting for?
Hm? Go scare them.
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00:09:03,560 --> 00:09:06,120
Shall I? Go on! Shall I?
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Wait, I can't scare 'em out
of somebody else's field.
118
00:09:16,280 --> 00:09:17,999
Why not?
119
00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:20,959
It don't count unless I scare
'em out of Ten-Acre Field.
120
00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:24,480
Well, they're not in Ten-Acre Field,
so this might be your only chance.
121
00:09:25,960 --> 00:09:28,839
No, no, no! If it's to be official,
122
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I'm going to have to get
'em back to my pad.
123
00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:32,480
Here.
124
00:09:34,400 --> 00:09:37,359
How are we going to get them to
come to Ten-Acre Field, then?
125
00:09:37,360 --> 00:09:41,279
Well, let's think.
Birds always go where the food is.
126
00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:42,959
So, what, a bag of grain?
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00:09:42,960 --> 00:09:45,159
No, no, no, no, no, no -
choughs don't eat grain,
128
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they likes worms
and crawly-creepers.
129
00:09:48,160 --> 00:09:50,040
Watch out, Worzel,
there's Mrs Perkins.
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00:09:54,280 --> 00:09:55,799
Hello!
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00:09:55,800 --> 00:09:59,679
Hello, Susan! Hello, John!
Where are you off to?
132
00:09:59,680 --> 00:10:00,719
Been bird-watching.
133
00:10:00,720 --> 00:10:03,119
Oh, lovely! See anything
interesting?
134
00:10:03,120 --> 00:10:06,479
Actually, yeah, there was
a flock of choughs up on Home Farm.
135
00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:10,679
Well, I never! Really?
Oh, that must be very unusual.
136
00:10:10,680 --> 00:10:12,839
Well done, you!
137
00:10:12,840 --> 00:10:14,480
See ya! Bye-bye!
138
00:10:20,840 --> 00:10:22,239
What did you tell her for?
139
00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:24,799
What? Mrs Perkins?
What's she going to do?
140
00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:27,359
She might try and
scare them herself!
141
00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:29,599
I doubt it.
Did you see how fast she moves?
142
00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:31,559
Even so, don't tell no-one else.
143
00:10:31,560 --> 00:10:34,439
Keep it under your hats till
I have a chance to have a go at 'em.
144
00:10:34,440 --> 00:10:37,320
Don't worry, Mrs Perkins
won't tell anyone.
145
00:10:53,080 --> 00:10:55,919
I'll spend the night getting
the worms up to the top.
146
00:10:55,920 --> 00:10:58,559
Come the morning, the choughs
will be here to eat them.
147
00:10:58,560 --> 00:11:02,079
As soon as they're settled, as
soon as they're comfortable, boom,
148
00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:04,399
I'll scare 'em
so bad they turn yellow.
149
00:11:04,400 --> 00:11:07,079
And I suggest, if you want
to witness my triumph,
150
00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:08,959
you get down here early.
151
00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:11,079
And how are you going to
get the worms to the top?
152
00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:13,079
I'll charm 'em. Charm them how?
153
00:11:13,080 --> 00:11:14,679
With dance.
154
00:11:14,680 --> 00:11:16,119
Pardon?
155
00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:18,479
I'll charm them
through the medium of dance.
156
00:11:18,480 --> 00:11:22,279
They gets nervous of vibration, see,
think a mole's coming to get them,
157
00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:26,919
so all the worms leg it, in a manner
of speaking, up to the surface.
158
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:29,759
I'll spend the night
coaxing them up.
159
00:11:29,760 --> 00:11:30,799
By dancing?
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00:11:30,800 --> 00:11:31,999
Tap dancing.
161
00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:34,359
HE SCOFFS
You cannot tap dance!
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00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:35,559
Can.
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00:11:35,560 --> 00:11:36,600
Go on, then.
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00:11:38,320 --> 00:11:43,879
HE CLICKS TONGUE
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00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:46,440
Watch the hands, not the feet -
it's all in the hands.
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00:11:51,160 --> 00:11:52,520
See you tomorrow, Worzel!
167
00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:55,600
Cheerio, chillens!
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00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:14,080
HENS CLUCK
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00:12:15,560 --> 00:12:17,879
So, have you got any
plans for tomorrow?
170
00:12:17,880 --> 00:12:19,599
We were going to get
up early, actually.
171
00:12:19,600 --> 00:12:21,960
Ooh! John spotted
a flock of rare birds today.
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00:12:23,600 --> 00:12:27,079
Rare birds? What rare birds?
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00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:28,719
Choughs.
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00:12:28,720 --> 00:12:31,479
Where? Here? Up at Home Farm.
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00:12:31,480 --> 00:12:33,759
Are you sure?
I've never heard the like.
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00:12:33,760 --> 00:12:36,559
I didn't know you were
a bird-watcher, Mr B.
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00:12:36,560 --> 00:12:39,319
I'm not, I'm a farmer.
178
00:12:39,320 --> 00:12:40,439
Makes sense, doesn't it,
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00:12:40,440 --> 00:12:43,080
that I should know what
birds are eating my crops?
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00:12:44,400 --> 00:12:45,800
Did you tell anyone else?
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00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:47,959
No.
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00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:50,119
Well, only Mrs Perkins
from the village.
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00:12:50,120 --> 00:12:51,560
Oh, marvellous!
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HE EXHALES
185
00:12:54,080 --> 00:12:55,880
I'm going to chop some firewood.
186
00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:02,759
Oh, I hate it when
he chops firewood.
187
00:13:02,760 --> 00:13:04,759
But we have central heating.
188
00:13:04,760 --> 00:13:05,800
Exactly.
189
00:13:07,040 --> 00:13:08,840
Sorry, did I say something wrong?
190
00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:11,600
Henry used to be a twitcher.
191
00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:16,159
A twitcher? When he was younger,
he used to...
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00:13:16,160 --> 00:13:17,439
Twitch?
193
00:13:17,440 --> 00:13:19,479
..spot birds. Oh.
194
00:13:19,480 --> 00:13:22,599
Is that what a twitcher is,
a bird-watcher?
195
00:13:22,600 --> 00:13:24,799
They don't watch birds -
they spot them.
196
00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:27,319
And they're only interested
in spotting as many different
197
00:13:27,320 --> 00:13:30,559
species as they can,
ticking them off a list.
198
00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:33,679
He used to race all
round the country
199
00:13:33,680 --> 00:13:36,479
whenever a rare one was seen.
200
00:13:36,480 --> 00:13:38,559
So, why did he give it up?
201
00:13:38,560 --> 00:13:42,719
I don't know -
he just...stopped one day.
202
00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:45,159
He never talks about it.
203
00:13:45,160 --> 00:13:48,440
Whenever the subject comes up,
he chops wood.
204
00:13:50,120 --> 00:13:51,800
Has anyone seen my axe?
205
00:14:09,560 --> 00:14:14,160
THEY TALK AMONGST THEMSELVES
206
00:14:39,440 --> 00:14:41,679
Who is it?
207
00:14:41,680 --> 00:14:42,880
Twitchers.
208
00:14:57,240 --> 00:14:59,919
There's no room here,
you'll have to go further up.
209
00:14:59,920 --> 00:15:03,080
This is my land.
You're all on my land!
210
00:15:04,640 --> 00:15:06,839
Don't tell me where
I can and can't go.
211
00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:08,719
This is a public right of way.
212
00:15:08,720 --> 00:15:11,719
More's the pity.
Well, you'd better not leave a mess.
213
00:15:11,720 --> 00:15:13,480
There they are - in Ten-Acre Field.
214
00:15:17,480 --> 00:15:19,479
Uh, here, have a look.
215
00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:22,639
No, I don't need those.
I can see 'em from here.
216
00:15:22,640 --> 00:15:25,320
They'd better not stay for long -
that's all I can say.
217
00:15:26,480 --> 00:15:28,639
And that scarecrow's
next to useless.
218
00:15:28,640 --> 00:15:30,280
They're not even bothered by it!
219
00:15:40,480 --> 00:15:42,760
Hello! Oh!
220
00:15:44,200 --> 00:15:47,079
This is exciting!
Are they in our field?
221
00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:49,599
What's going on?
Who's that cake for?
222
00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:53,039
Well, I thought these people
might like a piece of cake.
223
00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:56,279
Just being friendly -
they're guests on our land.
224
00:15:56,280 --> 00:16:00,999
Yeah, guests that weren't invited.
You're only encouraging 'em, look!
225
00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:02,679
They won't be off any time soon
226
00:16:02,680 --> 00:16:05,079
while there's a bloomin' cake
festival going on!
227
00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:07,599
Oh, stop exaggerating!
228
00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:11,279
It's like Glastonbury...with cake!
229
00:16:11,280 --> 00:16:12,839
Ha!
230
00:16:12,840 --> 00:16:16,639
Look, he's got one on his head. Oh!
231
00:16:16,640 --> 00:16:18,359
Oh...
232
00:16:18,360 --> 00:16:19,720
SHE LAUGHS
233
00:16:21,080 --> 00:16:22,120
SHE LAUGHS
234
00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:24,600
HE SIGHS
235
00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:29,759
BIRD SQUAWKS
236
00:16:29,760 --> 00:16:32,839
Get away with you,
you Cornish nincompoop!
237
00:16:32,840 --> 00:16:34,280
BIRD SQUAWKS
238
00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:37,719
Bad!
239
00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:39,000
HE SPITS
240
00:16:41,360 --> 00:16:43,440
BIRD SQUAWKS
241
00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:46,959
Poor Worzel,
he must be so frustrated.
242
00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:49,199
Well, how long do you think
the twitchers will stay?
243
00:16:49,200 --> 00:16:51,159
As long as the birds do.
244
00:16:51,160 --> 00:16:53,840
Let's go and see Earthy Mangold,
see what she thinks.
245
00:16:58,520 --> 00:16:59,760
Poor Worzel.
246
00:17:01,160 --> 00:17:02,919
They're all gathered at his feet.
247
00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:03,999
And on his head.
248
00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:06,079
And he's got 100
telescopes pointing at him,
249
00:17:06,080 --> 00:17:08,039
so he couldn't even
move to scare them.
250
00:17:08,040 --> 00:17:10,079
SHE CHUCKLES
251
00:17:10,080 --> 00:17:11,399
Earthy!
252
00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:14,079
Oh, I am sorry. I shouldn't laugh,
253
00:17:14,080 --> 00:17:16,799
but the thought of Worzel so close
254
00:17:16,800 --> 00:17:19,599
to a clattering of choughs and
not being able to scare them off!
255
00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:20,959
SHE LAUGHS
256
00:17:20,960 --> 00:17:23,119
Oh, he must be spitting twigs.
257
00:17:23,120 --> 00:17:24,840
He didn't look happy when we left.
258
00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:29,279
What ARE you doing with
those DVDs, Earthy?
259
00:17:29,280 --> 00:17:33,679
Hiding them away,
that's what I'm doing. Silly things.
260
00:17:33,680 --> 00:17:37,279
Gardener strings them up all over
the place to scare away the birds.
261
00:17:37,280 --> 00:17:38,999
He thinks he's helping.
262
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:40,439
Well, don't they work?
263
00:17:40,440 --> 00:17:45,120
Work too well - scare everything
away. Some birds are helpful.
264
00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:47,760
Look.
265
00:17:49,160 --> 00:17:51,519
If you scare away the song thrush,
266
00:17:51,520 --> 00:17:53,239
who will eat the snails?
267
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:55,639
And if you don't have blue tits,
268
00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:57,999
you'll definitely have greenfly.
269
00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:01,479
No, bird-scaring should be
left to the professionals.
270
00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:05,639
But it's good to recycle,
find new ways of using things.
271
00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:09,160
Certainly. But I think we can
find a better use for these.
272
00:18:10,320 --> 00:18:12,160
Well, what should
we do about Worzel?
273
00:18:13,320 --> 00:18:15,559
Nothing you can do, is there?
274
00:18:15,560 --> 00:18:17,359
Don't worry about him.
275
00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:20,079
Do him good to stay in his
patch for more than ten minutes,
276
00:18:20,080 --> 00:18:22,039
always wandering off.
277
00:18:22,040 --> 00:18:24,759
He should have scared them when
he had the chance, scared them back
278
00:18:24,760 --> 00:18:27,079
to the coast, instead of waiting and
279
00:18:27,080 --> 00:18:29,319
trying to get in the record books.
280
00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:31,199
No.
281
00:18:31,200 --> 00:18:34,079
One of the others
will get there first.
282
00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:35,279
Others?
283
00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:37,119
Other scarecrows.
284
00:18:37,120 --> 00:18:39,759
Ha! Nature loves to gossip.
285
00:18:39,760 --> 00:18:43,160
It won't be long before others hear
the news and start turning up.
286
00:18:50,400 --> 00:18:51,999
Oh, hello. Are you off?
287
00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:53,559
They've gone to roost for the night.
288
00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:55,760
But they'll be back.
See you tomorrow.
289
00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:15,080
Worzel, they've gone now,
so you can relax.
290
00:19:17,280 --> 00:19:18,840
Are you sure?
291
00:19:22,320 --> 00:19:24,759
HE SIGHS
292
00:19:24,760 --> 00:19:26,479
What a day!
293
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:29,519
Couldn't move a muscle up there
with all those eyes on me.
294
00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:32,759
Oh, felt like a caged armadillo!
295
00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:35,079
Now I've lost my chance to scare
296
00:19:35,080 --> 00:19:36,759
the choughs, mumble, grumble.
297
00:19:36,760 --> 00:19:38,719
The twitchers reckon
they'll be back tomorrow.
298
00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:40,639
Yeah, well, it'll be exactly
the same tomorrow
299
00:19:40,640 --> 00:19:41,839
as it was today, won't it?
300
00:19:41,840 --> 00:19:45,999
And I won't be able to do a stupid
thing about it, mumble, grumble.
301
00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:49,079
We really felt for you,
Worzel. Felt awful.
302
00:19:49,080 --> 00:19:50,519
Really?
303
00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:53,320
I thought I saw you enjoying
a slice of cake at one point.
304
00:19:55,280 --> 00:19:57,519
We did have a slice of cake,
to be fair.
305
00:19:57,520 --> 00:19:58,919
Nice, was it?
306
00:19:58,920 --> 00:20:00,119
It was all right.
307
00:20:00,120 --> 00:20:01,640
It was a bit dry, but...
308
00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:11,639
NEWS REPORTER: I'm afraid there
are several road closures
309
00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:14,279
in the north of the county due to
fallen trees and power lines.
310
00:20:14,280 --> 00:20:16,279
With localised flooding
causing disruption
311
00:20:16,280 --> 00:20:19,959
until at least early afternoon, it's
looking pretty grim, I'm afraid.
312
00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:22,159
But now with the funny
story at the end of the news,
313
00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:23,439
here's Hazel Diamond.
314
00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:26,519
Thanks, Colin, and we'll be back
at the same time tomorrow, coming...
315
00:20:26,520 --> 00:20:28,039
I saw that.
316
00:20:28,040 --> 00:20:29,479
Saw what?
317
00:20:29,480 --> 00:20:32,479
You fancy Hazel Diamond off the TV.
318
00:20:32,480 --> 00:20:33,759
I do not!
319
00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:35,959
Do you fancy
Hazel Diamond off the TV?
320
00:20:35,960 --> 00:20:38,639
No, I do not fancy
Hazel Diamond off the TV!
321
00:20:38,640 --> 00:20:41,479
You always get this soppy grin
whenever she comes on!
322
00:20:41,480 --> 00:20:43,239
I can assure you, I do not.
323
00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:45,679
Don't even know who you're talking
about. Whoa, sh, listen!
324
00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:48,279
Could this be the most useless
scarecrow in the country?
325
00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:50,879
One of our viewers sent
in this poor-quality
326
00:20:50,880 --> 00:20:53,159
footage of the...
Oh, that's your scarecrow!
327
00:20:53,160 --> 00:20:56,519
..on Scatterbrook,
where bird-watching enthusiasts have
328
00:20:56,520 --> 00:21:00,639
gathered by the dozen to see
a flock of rare coughs.
329
00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:03,359
Not only were they treated to
clear views of the birds,
330
00:21:03,360 --> 00:21:04,639
but when one of them
331
00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:08,319
used the scarecrow as a perch, it
was an amusing cherry on the cake.
332
00:21:08,320 --> 00:21:09,799
Oh!
333
00:21:09,800 --> 00:21:10,879
Oh!
334
00:21:10,880 --> 00:21:14,559
Here, this is what I need,
and this is what I'm going to get.
335
00:21:14,560 --> 00:21:17,759
The Scare-o-matic 5000
pneumatic bird-scarer.
336
00:21:17,760 --> 00:21:20,359
Makes a loud noise every few
minutes using compressed air,
337
00:21:20,360 --> 00:21:22,599
scares away all the pests.
338
00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:24,919
You can't get one of them.
They're horrible.
339
00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:27,239
Well, it'll be more use than that
bundle of sticks that's
340
00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:29,879
out there now. And now it's been on
the news, every twitcher in the
341
00:21:29,880 --> 00:21:32,959
country's going to be coming round
here. You'd better start baking more
342
00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:34,960
cakes, Reenie! Bunch of bloomin'...
343
00:21:35,960 --> 00:21:37,639
Mr B?
344
00:21:37,640 --> 00:21:38,680
Yeah, what?
345
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:41,880
Why did you give up bird-watching?
346
00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:50,920
I was good, really good.
347
00:21:52,680 --> 00:21:54,479
I had all the equipment,
348
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:56,959
species list as long as your arm.
349
00:21:56,960 --> 00:22:00,120
I even had a nickname -
"The Bird Man".
350
00:22:01,280 --> 00:22:02,879
Nice.
351
00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:05,279
Well, what happened?
352
00:22:05,280 --> 00:22:08,279
This one year, I got into a
competition with my deadly rival
353
00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:11,719
to see who could spot the
most species in 12 months.
354
00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:13,999
You had a deadly bird-watcher rival?
355
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:18,399
Yeah, fella by the name
of Lee Dangerman - bit of a twerp.
356
00:22:18,400 --> 00:22:23,679
Anyway, end of the year, we were
neck and neck on 523 species each,
357
00:22:23,680 --> 00:22:26,479
when I got a call that a
great bustard had been spotted
358
00:22:26,480 --> 00:22:28,759
on the Norfolk Broads!
359
00:22:28,760 --> 00:22:32,359
Well, I had to get
there before Dangerman.
360
00:22:32,360 --> 00:22:33,639
I jumped in the car.
361
00:22:33,640 --> 00:22:37,240
Four hours it took me in the rain,
and when I got there...
362
00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:42,640
..turns out it
had all been a wind-up.
363
00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:46,200
It was a prank call.
364
00:22:48,360 --> 00:22:49,720
There was no bustard.
365
00:22:52,960 --> 00:22:54,759
Who made the call?
366
00:22:54,760 --> 00:22:56,000
Three guesses.
367
00:22:57,040 --> 00:22:58,359
Lee Dangerman.
368
00:22:58,360 --> 00:23:01,519
I never proved it, but while
I was driving to Norfolk,
369
00:23:01,520 --> 00:23:04,519
he was on his way to Dorset, where
he spotted an even rarer bird,
370
00:23:04,520 --> 00:23:05,800
or so he claims...
371
00:23:08,200 --> 00:23:09,800
..so I lost the competition.
372
00:23:11,880 --> 00:23:14,560
And I've never touched
a pair of binoculars since.
373
00:23:19,880 --> 00:23:21,400
That's a sad story.
374
00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:23,640
Hm.
375
00:23:24,840 --> 00:23:27,200
Oh, well, I'm going to go
and lock up the barn.
376
00:23:30,400 --> 00:23:34,479
Mr Braithwaite,
what was the even rarer bird?
377
00:23:34,480 --> 00:23:36,879
The one that Lee Dangerman spotted?
378
00:23:36,880 --> 00:23:38,200
Red-knobbed coot.
379
00:23:45,480 --> 00:23:47,400
THEY LAUGH
380
00:24:06,960 --> 00:24:10,439
Morning! Have you heard?
They're back.
381
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:12,959
Haven't any of you
got jobs to go to?
382
00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:14,159
No!
383
00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:16,000
Any chance of some
more of that cake?
384
00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:28,320
You're kidding me!
385
00:24:30,640 --> 00:24:32,319
Are you the farmer?
386
00:24:32,320 --> 00:24:35,839
I'm a farmer, yes. This is my farm.
387
00:24:35,840 --> 00:24:38,079
Will I be able to get
this up the track?
388
00:24:38,080 --> 00:24:39,439
Are you serious?
389
00:24:39,440 --> 00:24:40,919
And the catering truck behind me?
390
00:24:40,920 --> 00:24:42,279
HORN BEEPS
What?!
391
00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:43,639
And a Portaloo?
392
00:24:43,640 --> 00:24:47,119
No, I'm sorry, you can't just
turn up here with your convoy
393
00:24:47,120 --> 00:24:49,839
and expect me to...
VAN DOOR SHUTS
394
00:24:49,840 --> 00:24:54,400
SWEEPING ORCHESTRAL MUSIC
395
00:24:56,640 --> 00:25:00,440
Mr Braithwaite. Hazel Diamond
from Good Evening Wessex News.
396
00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:05,039
Can I call you Henry?
Is it Henry or Harry?
397
00:25:05,040 --> 00:25:07,199
Harry. Ah, Henry!
398
00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:10,999
So amazingly generous of you
to welcome these enthusiasts
399
00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:14,439
on to your land, and us
and all our vehicles, too.
400
00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:15,479
Well, I...
401
00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:17,599
It must be such a headache for you.
402
00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:21,119
Oh, no, it's...
It's not forever, is it...Hazel?
403
00:25:21,120 --> 00:25:24,439
We just want to interview a couple
of the bird-watchers, and I'd love
404
00:25:24,440 --> 00:25:28,279
to get you on camera, grab a
few words, get your side of things.
405
00:25:28,280 --> 00:25:30,799
Would you be up for it?
Oh, I don't know...
406
00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:32,400
Wonderful! See you soon.
407
00:25:33,480 --> 00:25:34,720
Oh...
408
00:25:49,600 --> 00:25:51,999
Hazel Diamond, off the TV?!
409
00:25:52,000 --> 00:25:53,799
Yes!
410
00:25:53,800 --> 00:25:56,079
What do you mean, she's
up Ten-Acre Field?
411
00:25:56,080 --> 00:25:58,719
She is, I've just met her!
412
00:25:58,720 --> 00:26:01,239
Hazel Diamond, the one you fancy?
413
00:26:01,240 --> 00:26:03,520
I do not fancy her!
414
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:06,199
DOOR SHUTS
415
00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:08,000
Now, have you seen my good shirt?
416
00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:29,719
Hey up, farmer, just wondering
where your scarecrow went.
417
00:26:29,720 --> 00:26:31,159
Did you move it?
418
00:26:31,160 --> 00:26:32,719
I haven't touched it.
419
00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:35,159
To be honest, our viewers were
more interested in the funny
420
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:36,599
scarecrow than the coughs.
421
00:26:36,600 --> 00:26:38,039
HE CLEARS THROAT
Choughs.
422
00:26:38,040 --> 00:26:39,919
So, if you could find it,
put it back.
423
00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:42,519
I was just looking for Hazel.
424
00:26:42,520 --> 00:26:45,599
She's over there, speaking to
the guy who first spotted them.
425
00:26:45,600 --> 00:26:47,679
First spotted what? The choughs?
426
00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:49,239
I saw them first.
427
00:26:49,240 --> 00:26:52,039
Who's saying they saw
them before me?
428
00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:54,959
I'm here now with the man
who first spotted the rare birds.
429
00:26:54,960 --> 00:26:59,519
Yep, yep, yep, I saw them first,
before anybody else - it were easy.
430
00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:01,199
It must have been very exciting.
431
00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:02,599
No, not really.
432
00:27:02,600 --> 00:27:05,599
When you've seen as many exciting
birds as I have, it starts
433
00:27:05,600 --> 00:27:07,279
to get quite boring.
434
00:27:07,280 --> 00:27:10,279
Is it right that you hold
the bird-watching record?
435
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:11,599
That's me.
436
00:27:11,600 --> 00:27:13,679
I once met Chris Packham,
437
00:27:13,680 --> 00:27:17,039
and he said I were a better
bird-watcher than he was.
438
00:27:17,040 --> 00:27:20,639
Not my words -
Chris Packham's words.
439
00:27:20,640 --> 00:27:21,959
Wow.
440
00:27:21,960 --> 00:27:23,599
Have you seen a penduline tit?
441
00:27:23,600 --> 00:27:24,799
We'll cut there.
442
00:27:24,800 --> 00:27:25,840
I have.
443
00:27:26,920 --> 00:27:29,479
Henry! Where's your scarecrow?
444
00:27:29,480 --> 00:27:31,599
He was the star of the show.
445
00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:36,799
Do my eyes deceive me? Is that
the lesser-spotted Braithwaite?
446
00:27:36,800 --> 00:27:38,399
Good one.
447
00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:41,359
The great crested Henry Braithwaite?
448
00:27:41,360 --> 00:27:43,079
Very good, very funny.
449
00:27:43,080 --> 00:27:44,319
The long-tailed...
450
00:27:44,320 --> 00:27:45,360
We get it, Lee.
451
00:27:46,480 --> 00:27:50,199
Lee? Is this Lee Dangerman?
452
00:27:50,200 --> 00:27:52,319
The one and only -
nobody I'd rather be.
453
00:27:52,320 --> 00:27:57,399
Introducing Lee "needs no
introduction" Dangerman.
454
00:27:57,400 --> 00:27:59,960
Seen any great bustards
recently, Henners?
455
00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:04,039
You... You said you wanted
to grab a few words.
456
00:28:04,040 --> 00:28:05,799
Oh, there's no need now, Henry.
457
00:28:05,800 --> 00:28:08,240
I think we got everything
we need from Lee here.
458
00:28:09,920 --> 00:28:11,760
That's a lovely shirt, though.
459
00:28:14,800 --> 00:28:17,479
Right, time to put an end to this.
460
00:28:17,480 --> 00:28:20,399
We can go and look for the
scarecrow. Surely it can't be far.
461
00:28:20,400 --> 00:28:22,880
You do as you like -
I've got other plans.
462
00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:41,559
Now I feel bad for Worzel AND Mr B.
463
00:28:41,560 --> 00:28:43,879
Those choughs have brought
nothing but bad luck.
464
00:28:43,880 --> 00:28:45,399
Where can he be?
465
00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:48,600
Worzel wouldn't have completely
abandoned his post, would he?
466
00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:52,799
Psst! Oi! Up here!
467
00:28:52,800 --> 00:28:54,160
Come on.
468
00:28:59,760 --> 00:29:01,159
You all right, Worzel?
469
00:29:01,160 --> 00:29:05,639
Yeah, yeah, smashing, yeah. Turfed
off me own turf, mumble, grumble.
470
00:29:05,640 --> 00:29:07,399
Slept under a hedge.
471
00:29:07,400 --> 00:29:09,279
Hey, Worzel, guess what?
472
00:29:09,280 --> 00:29:12,120
Last night, we saw you on TV -
you're famous.
473
00:29:13,360 --> 00:29:16,639
I ain't much bothered about that,
I'm afraid, it don't interest me.
474
00:29:16,640 --> 00:29:19,279
I'm more worried about
these bloomin' red-legs.
475
00:29:19,280 --> 00:29:22,279
Worried about them? I thought
you wanted to scare them.
476
00:29:22,280 --> 00:29:24,159
Of course I's worried about them.
477
00:29:24,160 --> 00:29:27,479
I don't just scare willy-nilly
for the sake of scaring.
478
00:29:27,480 --> 00:29:29,879
I scares for very good reasons.
479
00:29:29,880 --> 00:29:32,719
These Cornish bugwits
need to go home.
480
00:29:32,720 --> 00:29:36,159
They don't belong here,
cos they belong by the sea.
481
00:29:36,160 --> 00:29:37,639
Things are out of balance.
482
00:29:37,640 --> 00:29:40,079
When things are out of balance,
it's easy for 'em
483
00:29:40,080 --> 00:29:41,800
to topple over completely.
484
00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:47,479
I want to scare 'em, certainly,
but it's for their own good
485
00:29:47,480 --> 00:29:48,960
and for the good of all.
486
00:30:11,360 --> 00:30:16,119
I once drove 350 miles to
see a blue-footed booby.
487
00:30:16,120 --> 00:30:17,480
Did you? Yep.
488
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:22,639
Did you know that in the bird
kingdom the males are usually
489
00:30:22,640 --> 00:30:25,079
far more colourful than the females?
490
00:30:25,080 --> 00:30:26,919
Are they? Yep.
491
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:28,279
Hey!
492
00:30:28,280 --> 00:30:29,919
What's the farmer doing?
493
00:30:29,920 --> 00:30:30,960
HORN BEEPS
494
00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:47,159
Oh, no!
495
00:30:47,160 --> 00:30:48,200
What is it?
496
00:30:51,480 --> 00:30:55,080
HE GROANS
497
00:31:03,360 --> 00:31:06,919
What the golly-goff
almighty is that?
498
00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:08,679
It's the Scare-o-matic 5000.
499
00:31:08,680 --> 00:31:10,399
The what-a-whatic what?
500
00:31:10,400 --> 00:31:14,479
It's a compressed-air bird-scarer
and it makes a really loud bang.
501
00:31:14,480 --> 00:31:17,159
Why does everyone think
they can do my job, eh?
502
00:31:17,160 --> 00:31:19,199
Why does everybody
think it's so easy?
503
00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:22,759
I don't go round telling other
people how to do their jobs, do I?
504
00:31:22,760 --> 00:31:26,119
Bird-scaring should be
left to the professionals.
505
00:31:26,120 --> 00:31:27,400
That's what Earthy said.
506
00:31:39,080 --> 00:31:40,439
Oi, you can't do that!
507
00:31:40,440 --> 00:31:41,559
Hey, that's not fair!
508
00:31:41,560 --> 00:31:43,159
Oi, you spoilsport!
509
00:31:43,160 --> 00:31:45,319
Come on, Henners, play the game!
510
00:31:45,320 --> 00:31:47,400
I hope you can sleep at night!
511
00:32:16,120 --> 00:32:17,760
MACHINE WHINES
512
00:32:20,640 --> 00:32:24,840
LAUGHTER
513
00:32:35,160 --> 00:32:36,799
It didn't work!
514
00:32:36,800 --> 00:32:40,400
It weren't loud enough! It just
blew a raspberry! Did you see?
515
00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:45,919
LAUGHTER
516
00:32:45,920 --> 00:32:48,599
See? It ain't as easy as it looks.
517
00:32:48,600 --> 00:32:50,640
Takes years to master my job.
518
00:32:53,040 --> 00:32:59,000
Now, the way I see it, we've got two
problems here - birds and humans.
519
00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:04,359
So, how are we going to get
rid of these...tremblers?
520
00:33:04,360 --> 00:33:07,639
Twitchers. They could be here till
the next rare bird's reported.
521
00:33:07,640 --> 00:33:09,879
OK, well, then, why
don't we tell them
522
00:33:09,880 --> 00:33:12,519
another rare bird's been
spotted somewhere else?
523
00:33:12,520 --> 00:33:13,919
They'll never fall for it.
524
00:33:13,920 --> 00:33:15,519
Wait.
525
00:33:15,520 --> 00:33:16,559
Waiting.
526
00:33:16,560 --> 00:33:18,760
What if there really
was another rare bird?
527
00:33:20,560 --> 00:33:23,359
I think I know what
you're getting at.
528
00:33:23,360 --> 00:33:24,680
Do you?
529
00:33:26,400 --> 00:33:28,959
Actually, no.
What are you getting at?
530
00:33:28,960 --> 00:33:31,639
There's that falconry
centre over in Penfold.
531
00:33:31,640 --> 00:33:34,919
We went there with Mr and Mrs B.
They've got loads of exotic birds.
532
00:33:34,920 --> 00:33:37,879
With the tawny eagle? It's massive.
533
00:33:37,880 --> 00:33:40,079
They're not just going to
lend you an eagle, are they?
534
00:33:40,080 --> 00:33:42,239
"Excuse me, can I borrow an eagle?"
535
00:33:42,240 --> 00:33:44,080
I wasn't thinking of borrowing one.
536
00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:46,919
Stealing one?
537
00:33:46,920 --> 00:33:48,879
How about asking one?
538
00:33:48,880 --> 00:33:51,519
Worzel, can you speak eagle?
539
00:33:51,520 --> 00:33:55,000
I can't, I'm afraid,
but I knows a man who can.
540
00:34:12,800 --> 00:34:14,439
WINTER GEORGE CHIRPS
541
00:34:14,440 --> 00:34:17,039
EAGLE SQUAWKS
542
00:34:17,040 --> 00:34:20,000
WINTER GEORGE CHIRPS
543
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:24,399
EAGLE SQUAWKS
544
00:34:24,400 --> 00:34:26,000
WINTER GEORGE CHIRPS
545
00:34:36,640 --> 00:34:38,559
Did you see the farmer
with the bird-scarer?
546
00:34:38,560 --> 00:34:39,879
Did you get it on camera?
547
00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:41,039
Yes.
548
00:34:41,040 --> 00:34:42,200
Yep, got all of that.
549
00:34:43,680 --> 00:34:45,959
Is that going to be the funny
bit at the end of the news -
550
00:34:45,960 --> 00:34:47,799
Braithwaite with the bird-scarer?
551
00:34:47,800 --> 00:34:48,879
Possibly.
552
00:34:48,880 --> 00:34:50,719
Unless something funnier happens.
553
00:34:50,720 --> 00:34:54,119
It were funny because the sound
it made went something like...
554
00:34:54,120 --> 00:34:55,519
EAGLE SCREECHES
555
00:34:55,520 --> 00:34:57,279
TWITCHERS GASP
556
00:34:57,280 --> 00:34:58,319
What is it?
557
00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:00,720
There, look! Some sort of eagle!
558
00:35:02,560 --> 00:35:04,839
Tawny eagle. Kelvin, the camera!
559
00:35:04,840 --> 00:35:06,679
It's packed away. Here it comes!
560
00:35:06,680 --> 00:35:08,319
Where? Where?!
561
00:35:08,320 --> 00:35:09,680
Where?! Argh! Oof!
562
00:35:11,120 --> 00:35:14,639
THEY GASP AND CLAP
563
00:35:14,640 --> 00:35:16,719
Unbelievable! Where?!
564
00:35:16,720 --> 00:35:18,520
EAGLE SCREECHES
Oh!
565
00:35:22,440 --> 00:35:23,759
Where?!
566
00:35:23,760 --> 00:35:27,000
Didn't you see it? What a shame.
Gosh, that was fantastic!
567
00:35:48,920 --> 00:35:52,039
Mission accomplished. Look at that!
568
00:35:52,040 --> 00:35:55,159
Flock of choughs to scare
and no humans to see me.
569
00:35:55,160 --> 00:35:56,879
Well, what are you waiting for?
570
00:35:56,880 --> 00:35:59,439
Go and scare them quick before
you lose your chance again.
571
00:35:59,440 --> 00:36:00,800
Just try and stop me.
572
00:36:04,720 --> 00:36:06,720
Watch and be awe-struck.
573
00:36:30,080 --> 00:36:32,280
HE YELLS
574
00:36:34,960 --> 00:36:36,799
HE YELLS
575
00:36:36,800 --> 00:36:38,079
Get away with you!
576
00:36:38,080 --> 00:36:39,480
HE YELLS
577
00:36:46,040 --> 00:36:47,800
Argh! Shoo!
578
00:36:54,160 --> 00:36:55,999
Oh, dear.
579
00:36:56,000 --> 00:36:57,879
Ah, he's lost his touch.
580
00:36:57,880 --> 00:36:59,079
They're not going anywhere.
581
00:36:59,080 --> 00:37:00,320
What's wrong with you?!
582
00:37:21,320 --> 00:37:23,080
Oh, he can't be giving up.
583
00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:31,759
They're too fat and full of worms.
584
00:37:31,760 --> 00:37:33,999
And they've got too used to humans.
585
00:37:34,000 --> 00:37:37,919
My position has been compromised and
I'm thinking of resigning my post.
586
00:37:37,920 --> 00:37:39,679
Don't be dramatic.
587
00:37:39,680 --> 00:37:43,159
If I, Worzel Gummidge,
the Scarecrow of Scatterbrook,
588
00:37:43,160 --> 00:37:45,719
can't scare a chough,
then we're in trouble.
589
00:37:45,720 --> 00:37:49,119
Well, why don't you ask for help
from the other scarecrows?
590
00:37:49,120 --> 00:37:50,759
They could be days getting here.
591
00:37:50,760 --> 00:37:53,479
They tend to dilly-dally,
get distracted.
592
00:37:53,480 --> 00:37:55,799
They're not the sharpest
tools in the box.
593
00:37:55,800 --> 00:37:56,840
Rude!
594
00:37:58,000 --> 00:37:59,919
Who said that?
595
00:37:59,920 --> 00:38:01,839
Er, nobody.
596
00:38:01,840 --> 00:38:03,999
Oh, beg pardon.
597
00:38:04,000 --> 00:38:05,479
I thought I heard someone.
598
00:38:05,480 --> 00:38:07,800
As I was saying,
running out of time...
599
00:38:09,880 --> 00:38:11,279
Hang on!
600
00:38:11,280 --> 00:38:14,559
Clarty, is that you in there?
601
00:38:14,560 --> 00:38:17,039
Oh, uh, how do, Worzel?
602
00:38:17,040 --> 00:38:19,439
Fancy seeing you here!
603
00:38:19,440 --> 00:38:23,239
What are you talking about? This is
my patch! What are YOU doing here?
604
00:38:23,240 --> 00:38:24,960
Someone said there were choughs.
605
00:38:26,880 --> 00:38:28,079
Who said?
606
00:38:28,080 --> 00:38:29,599
HMS Odney.
607
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:31,199
No, I didn't.
608
00:38:31,200 --> 00:38:32,599
Odney?
609
00:38:32,600 --> 00:38:34,319
It was Lofty Mawkin.
610
00:38:34,320 --> 00:38:37,440
No, it wasn't - it
was Rustle Sprouter.
611
00:38:38,640 --> 00:38:40,439
It wasn't me!
612
00:38:40,440 --> 00:38:42,839
How long have you lot been here?
613
00:38:42,840 --> 00:38:44,879
Why didn't you show your fizzogs?
614
00:38:44,880 --> 00:38:46,919
We wanted to give you some
space, mate, you know,
615
00:38:46,920 --> 00:38:49,239
give you a chance to
scare 'em yourself.
616
00:38:49,240 --> 00:38:51,839
Yeah, well, you'll have
seen how that turned out.
617
00:38:51,840 --> 00:38:55,479
But it's good you're here, chums,
and just in the nick of time.
618
00:38:55,480 --> 00:38:57,759
Just... Just a minute.
What did you mean
619
00:38:57,760 --> 00:39:00,520
when you said we weren't
the sharpest tools in the box?
620
00:39:05,000 --> 00:39:06,320
Hammers.
621
00:39:07,520 --> 00:39:09,319
You what?
622
00:39:09,320 --> 00:39:11,279
Well, hammers aren't
sharp, are they?
623
00:39:11,280 --> 00:39:14,119
Uh... No, I suppose they're not, no.
624
00:39:14,120 --> 00:39:16,799
You don't get much more useful
than a hammer, do you?
625
00:39:16,800 --> 00:39:18,199
That's what I meant!
626
00:39:18,200 --> 00:39:20,719
What kind of a tool box
would a tool box be
627
00:39:20,720 --> 00:39:22,320
with nails but nary a hammer?
628
00:39:23,440 --> 00:39:26,639
Um... None.
629
00:39:26,640 --> 00:39:27,799
Exactly!
630
00:39:27,800 --> 00:39:30,600
So, let's stop quibbling
and get on with the job in hand.
631
00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:33,640
Glad we cleared that up.
632
00:39:38,200 --> 00:39:40,120
Here, which way did it go?
633
00:39:41,600 --> 00:39:43,559
Out my way!
634
00:39:43,560 --> 00:39:45,440
Did you see it? Which way did it go?
635
00:39:54,120 --> 00:39:56,999
That one is rare, that -
the tawny eagle.
636
00:39:57,000 --> 00:39:58,359
If I can verify it,
637
00:39:58,360 --> 00:40:01,479
it'll be the first time a wild
one's been spotted in the UK.
638
00:40:01,480 --> 00:40:02,879
But you didn't see it.
639
00:40:02,880 --> 00:40:04,320
Let me through!
640
00:40:12,600 --> 00:40:14,559
There! Where? Up in the sky!
641
00:40:14,560 --> 00:40:17,959
Obviously, up in the sky!
Which direction? I can't see it!
642
00:40:17,960 --> 00:40:19,960
There, Kelvin, right up there.
643
00:40:22,520 --> 00:40:24,080
There it is.
644
00:40:28,440 --> 00:40:29,960
The tawny eagle.
645
00:40:38,600 --> 00:40:41,399
Tick, got that one. Next.
646
00:40:41,400 --> 00:40:43,079
Where do you think it came from?
647
00:40:43,080 --> 00:40:45,719
That one? That one's from Botswana.
648
00:40:45,720 --> 00:40:47,959
Came all the way up
the Okavango Delta.
649
00:40:47,960 --> 00:40:49,480
I'd stake my reputation on it.
650
00:40:50,920 --> 00:40:52,439
Well, it's coming closer.
651
00:40:52,440 --> 00:40:54,480
Is it? Not bothered.
Already seen it.
652
00:40:56,760 --> 00:40:58,600
EAGLE SQUAWKS
653
00:41:02,920 --> 00:41:06,800
LAUGHTER
654
00:41:13,040 --> 00:41:15,439
Did you get it?
Did you get it on camera?
655
00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:16,680
Got it.
656
00:41:22,160 --> 00:41:24,559
Hello, studio?
657
00:41:24,560 --> 00:41:28,400
This is Hazel Diamond. I've got the
funny story for the end of the news.
658
00:41:45,040 --> 00:41:47,039
Was you here to see this fiasco?
659
00:41:47,040 --> 00:41:48,519
It was a flop.
660
00:41:48,520 --> 00:41:50,639
A failure. A farce.
661
00:41:50,640 --> 00:41:54,359
What a waste! Ugh! Look at 'em.
662
00:41:54,360 --> 00:41:57,040
There they are, oily twerps!
663
00:41:58,280 --> 00:41:59,800
Be nice, please!
664
00:42:01,520 --> 00:42:03,279
So how are we going to do this?
665
00:42:03,280 --> 00:42:05,399
I reckons we've only
got the one chance.
666
00:42:05,400 --> 00:42:08,039
I've been dying to
get my hands on them for a week.
667
00:42:08,040 --> 00:42:11,599
A week? They only showed up
the day before yesterday.
668
00:42:11,600 --> 00:42:14,239
No, they was here before that.
669
00:42:14,240 --> 00:42:17,439
Saturday and Sunday
they were up over Pike Turn Lane.
670
00:42:17,440 --> 00:42:19,960
Was they? Was they?
671
00:42:21,040 --> 00:42:23,279
So they wasn't blown
here by the storm?
672
00:42:23,280 --> 00:42:27,240
More likely they was flying
ahead of it. Knew it was coming.
673
00:42:28,840 --> 00:42:30,999
Because they were scared of it.
674
00:42:31,000 --> 00:42:32,839
Scared of the storm.
675
00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:35,359
That's what these
choughs are afraid of.
676
00:42:35,360 --> 00:42:37,479
We've got to make them
think there's another storm
677
00:42:37,480 --> 00:42:41,239
coming in the opposite direction to
scare them all the way home again.
678
00:42:41,240 --> 00:42:45,559
OK, so what are the signs
that a storm's on its way?
679
00:42:45,560 --> 00:42:47,119
Rain?
680
00:42:47,120 --> 00:42:49,439
No, that's a sign a
storm's already here.
681
00:42:49,440 --> 00:42:52,879
There's far more subtler signs
that a storm's on its way.
682
00:42:52,880 --> 00:42:55,799
A sense of foreboding, for example.
683
00:42:55,800 --> 00:42:58,039
Lofty, can you take charge of that?
684
00:42:58,040 --> 00:42:59,599
Eh? Ooh, ooh!
685
00:42:59,600 --> 00:43:03,319
Um, aching joints
and knees in the elderly.
686
00:43:03,320 --> 00:43:05,879
Good one, Clarty. You take
care of that. Oh, but...
687
00:43:05,880 --> 00:43:07,839
And then a strange smell.
688
00:43:07,840 --> 00:43:10,039
John, you can sort that out.
689
00:43:10,040 --> 00:43:11,959
What? How do you want me
to make a strange smell?
690
00:43:11,960 --> 00:43:14,319
How do you normally do it?
CHUCKLING
691
00:43:14,320 --> 00:43:17,160
John's right -
there must be easier ways.
692
00:43:18,560 --> 00:43:20,080
Can't we re-use this somehow?
693
00:43:22,320 --> 00:43:23,799
Throw it at 'em.
694
00:43:23,800 --> 00:43:25,560
No, we don't want to hurt them!
695
00:43:26,600 --> 00:43:28,119
Robot costumes?
696
00:43:28,120 --> 00:43:29,480
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah!
697
00:43:30,880 --> 00:43:35,840
This is shiny, like those DVDs
Earthy said scare everything.
698
00:43:41,200 --> 00:43:45,279
RUMBLING
699
00:43:45,280 --> 00:43:47,799
RUMBLING STOPS
700
00:43:47,800 --> 00:43:49,240
Eureka!
701
00:43:55,400 --> 00:44:00,080
IMAGINARY APPLAUSE
702
00:44:31,640 --> 00:44:36,079
The winds that
blow in from the west
703
00:44:36,080 --> 00:44:40,279
Will fell the strongest tree
704
00:44:40,280 --> 00:44:44,919
And take with it
the precious life
705
00:44:44,920 --> 00:44:49,879
That lives within the leaves
706
00:44:49,880 --> 00:44:52,999
Winds high
707
00:44:53,000 --> 00:44:56,159
Winds low
708
00:44:56,160 --> 00:45:00,759
Will change the way we thrive
709
00:45:00,760 --> 00:45:04,599
Winds high
710
00:45:04,600 --> 00:45:07,279
Winds low
711
00:45:07,280 --> 00:45:11,999
No matter, we will grow
712
00:45:12,000 --> 00:45:16,359
The winds that
blow in from the east
713
00:45:16,360 --> 00:45:20,959
Will scare the birds the least
714
00:45:20,960 --> 00:45:25,439
They'll sit and
stare beneath the stars
715
00:45:25,440 --> 00:45:30,279
And crow to taunt the beast
716
00:45:30,280 --> 00:45:33,759
Winds high
717
00:45:33,760 --> 00:45:36,879
Winds low
718
00:45:36,880 --> 00:45:41,639
Will change the way we thrive
719
00:45:41,640 --> 00:45:44,559
Winds high
720
00:45:44,560 --> 00:45:47,959
Winds low
721
00:45:47,960 --> 00:45:51,920
No matter, we will grow.
722
00:46:15,000 --> 00:46:17,400
THUNDEROUS CLATTER
723
00:46:22,200 --> 00:46:25,560
CHOUGHS SQUAWK, SCARECROWS CHEER
724
00:46:31,040 --> 00:46:34,080
SCARECROWS CHEER AND LAUGH
725
00:46:41,880 --> 00:46:43,879
THEY LAUGH
726
00:46:43,880 --> 00:46:47,879
And then the farmer gets this great
big bird-scaring contraption,
727
00:46:47,880 --> 00:46:49,359
puts it in my field...
728
00:46:49,360 --> 00:46:50,839
The Scare-o-matic 5000.
729
00:46:50,840 --> 00:46:54,919
Scare-o-matic 5000.
He starts it up, and it goes...
730
00:46:54,920 --> 00:46:56,759
Clarty, do the noise.
731
00:46:56,760 --> 00:46:58,519
HE CLEARS THROAT
732
00:46:58,520 --> 00:46:59,759
HE TRUMPETS
733
00:46:59,760 --> 00:47:04,040
THEY LAUGH
734
00:47:09,560 --> 00:47:11,520
Oh... Oh...
735
00:47:13,920 --> 00:47:15,200
Do it again.
736
00:47:16,640 --> 00:47:17,879
HE TRUMPETS
737
00:47:17,880 --> 00:47:22,240
THEY LAUGH
738
00:47:27,840 --> 00:47:31,639
But those poor birds are homeward
bound, aren't they, Worzel?
739
00:47:31,640 --> 00:47:33,959
Winging their way
westwards as we speak, Earthy.
740
00:47:33,960 --> 00:47:37,239
The whole operation
was a raving success.
741
00:47:37,240 --> 00:47:40,799
Well, I think
you all deserve a prize.
742
00:47:40,800 --> 00:47:42,320
A prize?
743
00:47:43,360 --> 00:47:46,599
What, us? Yes, I think so.
744
00:47:46,600 --> 00:47:49,839
When scarecrows all work
together for the common good,
745
00:47:49,840 --> 00:47:51,120
they should get a prize.
746
00:47:52,160 --> 00:47:55,119
What kind of prize?
747
00:47:55,120 --> 00:47:56,159
A medal.
748
00:47:56,160 --> 00:48:00,399
Yes! That's one of the best
kinds of prizes! I'd love a medal!
749
00:48:00,400 --> 00:48:03,560
Well, then, line up in an orderly
fashion and be serious.
750
00:48:05,320 --> 00:48:07,919
Getting a medal is a very
serious occasion.
751
00:48:07,920 --> 00:48:09,359
INDISTINCT CHATTER
752
00:48:09,360 --> 00:48:11,519
And in the funny story at
the end of the news,
753
00:48:11,520 --> 00:48:14,479
these bird-watchers thought this
eagle was a once-in-a-lifetime
754
00:48:14,480 --> 00:48:18,000
sighting, only to find out
it was an escaped pet!
755
00:48:19,800 --> 00:48:22,800
LAUGHTER
756
00:48:24,160 --> 00:48:25,600
Reenie!
757
00:48:29,800 --> 00:48:31,840
HMS Odney.
758
00:48:33,440 --> 00:48:34,480
Clarty.
759
00:48:36,520 --> 00:48:38,360
Lofty Mawkin.
760
00:48:39,720 --> 00:48:41,760
Rustle Sprouter.
761
00:48:44,680 --> 00:48:46,840
And Worzel Gummidge.
762
00:48:50,680 --> 00:48:53,159
I hereby declare you all
763
00:48:53,160 --> 00:48:55,559
members of the most fantastic
764
00:48:55,560 --> 00:48:57,919
guild of scare choughs.
765
00:48:57,920 --> 00:48:59,999
Three hips! Hip, hip!
766
00:49:00,000 --> 00:49:02,680
THEY CHEER
767
00:49:14,120 --> 00:49:16,879
Windy old weather
768
00:49:16,880 --> 00:49:19,359
Stormy old weather
769
00:49:19,360 --> 00:49:22,199
When the wind blows
770
00:49:22,200 --> 00:49:25,079
We'll all pull together
771
00:49:25,080 --> 00:49:27,839
Windy old weather
772
00:49:27,840 --> 00:49:30,439
Stormy old weather
773
00:49:30,440 --> 00:49:33,159
When the wind blows
774
00:49:33,160 --> 00:49:36,039
We'll all pull together
775
00:49:36,040 --> 00:49:38,679
Windy old weather
776
00:49:38,680 --> 00:49:41,559
Stormy old weather
777
00:49:41,560 --> 00:49:44,119
When the wind blows
778
00:49:44,120 --> 00:49:47,800
We'll all pull together.
779
00:49:47,850 --> 00:49:52,400
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