Original subtitles

- Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com -

Grazie.

Ciao.

- Grazie. - Prego.

- Grazie, Walter. Buona giornata. - Ciao.

- Prego. - Permesso.

Scusi.

- Hey. - Hey. How was it?

Yeah, good. I got like... ... 20,000 steps.

Yeah? Nice.

I'm surprised you're awake.

Well, I know you always get horny

after your run so I... Uh...

I'm gonna be so good today. And friendly...

Why?

Because you've been accusing me of being a bitch.

- I never once said bitch. - Okay.

Well, whatever, I'm not gonna be that.

He's your bestie from college,

and you want his approval for some reason...

- I do not want his approval. - ... which is totally normal

and fine and human,

but I'm gonna be so fun.

I'm gonna be the life of the party from now on.

Well, don't overdo it. They'll know it's fake.

I love them. What? They're our good friends.

Oh, my God.

What? You don't think I can be lovely?

Just watch.

Okay, that's for you guys. Thank you. Thank you.

I'm sorry to be so pushy.

I just really need you guys to leave.

- Oh. Yeah. - Uh. See you.

- Bye. - Bye.

- See you later. - Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Good morning.

Morning.

Mm-mm.

- (INDISTINCT CHATTER - HARPER: Oh! There they are.

Probably. Yeah.

Morning.

Hi.

- Good morning. - How'd you sleep?

- Good. Yeah. - Great.

Did you guys see the sky this morning?

It was so gorgeous.

- Yeah. - Yeah. It was.

I love that top. So cute.

Oh, thanks. You know, I've never seen you

in a headband. It's so pretty.

Oh. Thanks. It's... it's my new Italian style.

I really like it.

Let's get some food. I woke up starving.

- Hmm. - God. Do you guys want anything?

- No, I'm... I'm good. - Yeah.

- I'm good. Thank you. Yeah. - Okay.

Babe, want to come to the buffet?

Sure. Yeah.

Do you mind if I...

No. Please.

That was fun last night.

Yeah.

Um, I did want to come in and keep hanging out.

Just so you know.

Then you should've come in.

I just don't want to ever make anyone feel,

you know, uncomfortable.

I don't think that you're the type of guy

that could ever make someone feel uncomfortable

in that way, you know?

You could probably go a little bit

in the other direction, actually.

Like... more aggressive?

I can't keep stuffing my face at these breakfasts.

But they're free, you know?

It's such a conundrum.

Morning. How you doing?

Who were the girls?

What girls?

The two girls I saw coming out of your room.

Maybe the maids?

They didn't look like maids. They looked like...

... prostitutes.

Oh, well, I don't know what you're talking about.

Listen, whatever you do,

please don't say anything about any of this to Albie.

Okay? Dad, please?

Look at those cannolis.

I've gotta find another job.

I'm just at a weird place, you know?

I've been...

I've been feeling so depressed at home,

and I just thought I'd come here

and feel something...

Is everything boring?

Boring?

No.

I just feel like there must have been a time

when the world had more.

You know? Like... mystery or... or something,

and now you come somewhere like this and it's beautiful

and you take a picture, and then you realize

that everybody's taken that exact same picture

from that exact same spot.

You just made some redundant content, for stupid Instagram.

- Yeah. - And you can't even

get lost anymore 'cause you can just find yourself

on Google Maps.

Throw away your phone.

Yeah...

Throw it in the ocean.

God, it is so nice out today. What do you guys wanna do?

Well, I've been bugging Cam to go to Noto.

It's this beautiful baroque town like two hours from here.

There's these amazing palazzos and artisanal shops.

Mm! That sounds cool.

See!

Harper thinks it sounds cool.

Honey, come on.

I already said I booked jet skis for me and E.

Yeah, do it tomorrow.

Babe, I wanna jet ski.

And I don't know if we're gonna get this weather again.

We can go to Noto any other day.

Cam, it's the one thing I said I really wanted to do here.

I wanna get Christmas presents!

Jesus Christ! It's July, Daph.

Christmas shopping.

You know what, that's actually fine.

You guys should do your jet skiing.

I'm just gonna go to Noto by myself.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Come on.

Babe, it's fine. Honestly.

Unless you want to come?

Mm?

Oh.

I mean, you don't have to.

You guys will have fun.

Yeah, right? Harper, you should go.

Oh, yeah. Sure.

- Okay. - Yeah, I'd love to go.

I mean, everybody says, "You gotta go to Noto."

Oh, God, yeah. Gotta go to Noto.

Great.

Take pictures.

- I made a plan for us today. - I planned a tour.

You planned a tour?

Well, I couldn't sleep last night.

For some reason, there was a lot of noise

coming through the walls.

Anyway, they have a bunch of movies

you can rent on the TV.

One of them was The Godfather. You've seen it, right?

- Some of it, I think. Yeah. - "Some of it?"

Francis Ford Coppola made three of them.

First two are classics,

and they were shot right around here.

So, I got us a car and driver and we're gonna do

a tour of all the locations. You should come.

Come on now, educate yourself.

That's okay. I don't...

Yeah, you gotta come.

It's okay, I... I don't...

No. You're coming. She's coming.

I'm being more aggressive.

Oh.

But I feel like that if you really loved me...

... you wouldn't leave.

I have to.

Is it the prenup? Is that why you wanna...

Is it 'cause I had the prenu... I could get rid of the prenup.

We can talk about that when I get back. In two days.

See? You always look annoyed with me.

You look like that.

Tanya... you've done a lot for me, okay?

You found those doctors.

I... I'm gonna live because of you.

But ever since you found out that you're gonna

have a lot more years, I feel like you just realized

that you were gonna be stuck living them with me.

Couples don't always get along.

You knew I wasn't great at this. I've been married four times.

Four?

Tanya?

I thought it was only three.

Tanya. Four, including you.

I just love you.

Tanya. Tanya, please. You're gonna wet your dress.

Grazie.

- Grazie. - Grazie.

Grazie, mila grazie.

Chi prendi in giro?

I'm gonna miss you.

- God. Be mature. - All right.

- You guys will have fun. - All right.

I'm Daphne. Grazie for driving.

Here you go, sweetheart.

Thanks, babe.

Thank you so much for coming with me.

Yeah, of course. I'm excited.

Me too.

Bye, guys. Have fun!

- Bye, babe. - Bye.

Have the most fun ever.

Ciao.

So exciting.

Yay!

Dude, how awesome is this?

- Ciao, ladies. - Hey.

This is where Michael Corleone was hiding out.

Another mafia family was trying to kill him.

And his wife blew up over there.

The car was rigged with a bomb meant for Michael.

But his wife is gonna drive for some reason.

Michele? Michele, andiamo!

Pacino realizes, he screams...

No!

"Apollonia!"

It's too late. Car explodes, she blows up.

It's a great scene.

- She blows up? - Uh-huh.

- Like, blows up? - Mm-hmm.

It's a little tasteless maybe.

Well, look, they're trying to make a buck.

They own a house where they shot

the best American movie ever made.

No, it's not.

No? Why not? I think so.

Well, yeah, I mean, you would.

All right, what's that supposed to mean?

It's because you're nostalgic for the solid days

of the patriarchy.

They're undeniably great movies.

Men love The Godfather because they feel emasculated

by modern society.

It's a fantasy about a time when they could go out

and solve all their problems with violence...

♪ Un focu d'amuri... ♪

... and sleep with every woman...

♪ ... Hey, hey, hey, hey! ♪

... and then come home to their wife

who doesn't ask them any questions

- and makes them pasta. - Hey, hey, hey.

It's a normal male fantasy.

No, movies like that socialize men into having that fantasy.

Movies like that exist because men already

do have that fantasy. We're hard-wired.

Mm. Comes with the testosterone.

No. Gender is a construct. It's created.

You spent all that money on Stanford,

he comes back brainwashed.

Two days.

All right.

Airport, go. Bye-bye. Bye-bye.

No, no.

Buongiorno. How can I help you?

I... Uh...

are there any psychics in this town?

Uh...

Psychics? Sorry, I don't... I don't understand.

Like, you know, old-school, you know, Gypsy,

like, psychic fortune teller type of person?

Oh. Oh, you mean...

Oh. We have a tarocchi.

Oh, yes. Um, a tarot card reader here in Taormina. Yes.

Do you think they could make a house call?

Because, like, I... You know, it really is...

It's kind of an emergency.

Mm. Is everything all right?

I'm gonna be in my room.

Rocco.

Uh. Uh, this is my boss, so, I have to... get it.

- Go on. - I'll be back.

Hi?

Hi. Where are you?

Um... ... I'm at lunch.

Well, you need to come back to the room 'cause Greg is gone.

Gone? What do you mean, he's gone?

I need you.

Okay. Um... Well, I'm... I'm not at the hotel currently,

- so... - I told you to stay close by.

Come back here!

Uh, my boss needs me to go back,

so, I have to go back to the hotel. Sorry.

- Okay. - Oh.

No. We'll take you back.

No, it's, uh, fine. I'll just get a taxi

- or figure it out... - Well, the driver can take her,

- and come back and get us. - Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Take the car. And, um,

let's... let's meet up later.

Okay. That's very kind of you. Thank you.

And thanks again for an entertaining day.

Uh...

Yeah. Okay, have fun. Um... I can Venmo you

- for just the... - No!

- Come on. - Sorry, again. Bye.

Bye.

Great. Thanks, Dad.

What? Her boss needed her.

You think she just wanted to get away from us?

Maybe.

You do have a knack for repelling women.

Do we embarrass you, Albie?

No, it's just...

I don't think...

you realize how you sound sometimes.

They used to respect the old.

Now, we're just reminders of an offensive past

everybody wants to forget.

Hi! Thank you so much.

Yeah, you have an amazing terrace,

where you can have a glass of wine

from our familiar vineyards.

And here is our dining room,

where you'll have your breakfast,

and obviously please feel at home.

- Oh. - And, uh, feel comfortable.

And anything you need, we are here for you.

- Thank you so much, Peppe. - Okay.

- Ciao, Daphne. - Ciao.

Oh, my God.

Are you gonna tell me what's going on?

So, I was reading about Noto

- in Architectural Digest, right? - Mm-hmm.

And there were pictures of this palazzo.

So, I was like, "Maybe we can get a tour."

So, I called them, and they told me...

"You can rent the whole place

out for the night." So, I did.

We're staying the night?

Don't you think we should?

I mean, I was gonna wait and see if it was worth it,

but now that we're here

it's like we kinda have to, right?

- I don't have any stuff. - Oh, don't worry about it.

I packed extra everything. Toothpaste... Whatever you need.

Oh, God, this is just beyond.

I can't believe it. Come out here!

I think that's a pool.

And guess who brought an extra bathing suit?

Don't you feel a little weird being here

without the guys?

No. They didn't want to come. And don't you think

it's better to just do what you want,

even if it's by yourself?

I mean, Cameron does what he wants all the time.

Why let them have all the fun?

Hmm.

Let's check out the bedrooms!

- Cheers! - Cheers, buddy.

I gotta say it, man. I'm so proud of you.

I mean, you...

you fucking knocked it out of the park, man.

- You did it. - Thank you.

I'm not surprised.

I always knew you were gonna do something great.

Took a little while, but...

Come on. You're 36. Give me a break.

Well, you've been raking it in for years now.

Just wish you'd given me a heads-up, you know?

- What? - I have to hear from Gary Pizzinat

that you sold your company for a shitload? And by then, you know,

it was too late for me to do anything with it.

Oh, you mean, like... Dude, I couldn't say anything.

You could have hinted.

It's also illegal.

A little birdie in the ear. That's it. Information, dude.

I mean, come on, guys like me, that's... that's all we got.

- I'm sorry. I wasn't... - It's okay.

- You know, I just... - Don't worry about it.

Next time.

But you need to invest some of that with us. Okay?

I don't know if you've heard,

but I make people money, bro.

I know you do.

Well, then let me do what I do for you.

I... I would... I would love that, E.

I would love to help you and Harper.

Please, let me.

Look, just come in to the office. All right?

When we get back, you meet the guys,

and then you just hang out. That's it. No pressure.

All right. Sounds good.

- Sounds good? - Yeah.

I am so stoked for you, E.

I'm so happy.

Thanks, Cam. Thank you. I appreciate it.

Cheers, baby. Mm.

Hey, buddy, two more.

Wow.

Oh, she's the real deal.

Hmm.

A real, authentic, old-world gypsy.

That's what I asked for.

I don't think you're supposed to use that word.

What? All right. She's, uh...

She's a real old-school... Gypsy.

Ma'am?

Yes, would you like some water or some soda?

I could make you and I a highball.

All right.

Guys in Italy wear their pants so tight.

Yeah, 'cause they want to show off

their dicks.

Why didn't you just tell me

we were really gonna spend the night?

I really want Cam to think that we just had so much fun

that we just wanted to stay.

He has really intense FOMO and also abandonment issues.

So, it's just gonna be really funny to tell him

we're living it up at some sick palazzo.

So, you're like playing games with him?

We both do it. It's like hide and seek.

Keeps things interesting.

Yeah, well Ethan and I,

we... we don't really do that.

So, I'm... I'm probably gonna have to call him

and tell him we're gonna stay here.

Can I call Cam first, please?

- Okay. Sure. - Okay.

Hey, babe! How's Noto?

Amazing.

I think that we're probably gonna spend the night.

- What? - Yeah.

This incredible palazzo I found, so, I booked it.

- Wha... - But we'll be back tomorrow.

W... You're coming back tomorrow?

- Yeah, but have fun, okay? - What?

Listen, I think I have to go 'cause Harper's

waiting for me in the pool.

No, uh, honey, w... what pool? What are you talk...

The pool in our palazzo.

- Oh, you would die. - I'll send you pics.

- Love you, honey. Bye! - Uh...

Oh.

They're staying the night in Noto. She booked a palazzo.

- She did? - Yeah.

That's kind of weird.

She always pulls this shit, man.

Fucking punishing me.

But you know what that means?

You and me, we're gonna fucking party!

Let's go jet skiing.

All right. Okay. I'm coming.

Okay. Well... now what?

You ask a question and then the cards will answer.

Oh. Okay. Um... I wanna know,

uh, my husband, you know, Greg...

Something is just...

Uh, do... C... could you just leave the room

for a second?

You know, hang out in the bathroom

for a little while.

No problem. Yeah.

Um...

Oh. Yeah. I want, um... Is...

I want to know if we're gonna make it.

I mean, I just want to know if our marriage is gonna last.

The cards say your husband is in love with someone else.

This card means deceit. He is being deceitful.

And this card is beauty.

There's someone beautiful in his life.

Uh, couldn't that be me?

Not you.

Not me?

For sure, not you.

Uh, yeah.

This is very negative.

I can't believe I paid for this. 'Cause this is just really...

You are so negative!

It's not supposed to be like this.

You're supposed to... This is supposed to build me up.

Take your crappy things and your horrible cards...

... and your shitty little ashtray.

No, I didn't want this. This is creepy.

No, it's...

No. You gotta go. Get out!

Yeah, well, whatever...

You're a con artist is what you are.

That wasn't good.

Negative.

Okay, guys, we'll meet up around 7:30 downstairs?

Yeah, that sounds good.

But somebody give me a wakeup call.

- I'm gonna take a nap. - Okay. I'll come grab you, Nono.

Hey, Albie.

Yeah?

Hey, um...

I feel like you have this wrong, distorted impression of me.

I have always supported women. I have always promoted women.

I'm a feminist.

I mean, I didn't marry some subservient wife.

Your mother is a brilliant, amazing woman.

- Did you talk to her? - We didn't talk about you, Dad.

No, I don't want to get you in the middle. Um...

You don't have to say anything to her.

But if you did say something...

... I'm hoping you'd tell her

that I'm really, really, really missing her

and Cara, and... and that I feel...

I feel really awful.

She listens to you.

Nothing is gonna fix this.

No?

You have to change, Dad.

You have to stop doing

what you're doing and actually change.

I know that. And I have changed. And I am changing.

I can change.

- Oh, yeah? - Yes.

I can be the man she wants me to be, again.

I'll see you at dinner.

See you.

Did she leave?

Tanya? What happened? I thought I was...

I thought I was gonna get a reading.

No. You don't want her.

She was very negative.

Oh.

I'm sorry to hear that.

I think I'm gonna take a nap.

Okay.

Bye.

No, you can't go. You can't go. You just...

Please just sit on the couch. I just...

I did get the new Vanity Fair.

You can read it.

Hey, hey. Psp. Psp.

- Vey! Marry me! - Oh! No, grazie!

Um... oh, there's a machine. I'm gonna get cash out,

I'll be right back.

Come on, there's a couple more stores I wanna hit.

Lots of horny dudes in Noto.

What are these?

The man, this table, bought these for you.

Oh!

That's sweet.

I'm gonna have an edible. Do you want an edible?

Try having two kids under four. They help me relax. Have one.

Okay, I just have be careful.

The last time I did edibles, I took way too many

and I ended up on the floor in the fetal position.

I kept saying,

- "I am a woman." - What?

Why?

I don't know. I think I was just...

... tripping out on being a woman.

Don't you like being a woman?

I'm fine with it, usually.

Mm. I do.

I'd hate to be a man, honestly.

It'd just be so lonely. I mean, they're so competitive.

It's like, can they even be friends with each other?

Cameron and I went on a safari

and, um, on safari, you see

all these pods of elephants and they're all, like,

bathing in the river and playing

with each other and it's so sweet.

But it's just the moms and the babies.

Because when the boy elephants get too big,

they kick them out of the pod.

And then the bull elephant has to, like,

wander through the jungle by himself

for the rest of his life.

I feel sorry for men, you know.

It's like... they think they're out there

doing something really important.

but really they're just wandering alone.

Whoo!

Grazie.

- Hello. - Hello.

- Buonasera! - Buonasera.

Um, listen, uh, I just wanted to tell you

that I don't think I can meet up tonight.

- Why? - Um,

I'm afraid my son's gonna catch on,

but, really, I... I need to change.

I really have to change, so,

I don't think I'm going to be able to meet up

at all this week. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry too because I thought

we were spending the week together.

I know. But I... I can't.

And I'm really sorry.

My son's on his way down, so, I gotta go.

But listen, I really, really loved meeting you.

- You're a wonderful... - Me, too.

... beautiful woman, and it was really fun.

And this is for the ladies, please.

- Thank you. - Thank you too. Thank you.

My two favorite people in the world!

Thought we'd lost you.

I had to handle something with the concierge.

- Uh-huh. - You hungry?

I'm starving.

Gentleman.

Okay.

Grazie.

Vabbè... Grazie, Isabella.

Um...

Grazie.

Prego.

♪ You're nobody til... ♪

♪ Somebody loves you ♪

♪ So find yourself ♪ ♪ Somebody to love... ♪

Mia!

Buonasera.

Now, that you're a big shot, people must be

slipping into your DMs left and right.

No.

What good would it do me if they were?

I mean, I'm married.

Dude, everyone cheats, E.

No, they don't.

Come on!

- They do? - Yeah!

Of course, they fucking do.

It's a crime of opportunity. Jesus! If they can.

So, how's your sex life?

Um...

Sounds great.

I don't know. Uh... It's hard, I guess,

when you know everything about each other

and you've seen each other on the toilet and, you know...

There you go, man. See? We've only got one life.

But Harper and I are...

- Codependent? - No.

I don't lie to my wife.

Really?

Oh, man. Fuck, I didn't know that.

That is so sweet!

♪ ... Oh, the world ♪ ♪ Will be the same ♪

♪ You'll never change it... ♪

After this, I am going swimming.

♪ You're nobody 'til ♪

♪ Somebody loves you... ♪

You already met a guy here?

Kinda. Yeah, I did, he's really smart

and everything, he went to Stanford.

You know, one of those guys.

- He's really nice. - Like...

... maybe a little too nice, you know?

I wish he just, like, got my heart rate up

a little bit more or something.

Portia.

Don't spend your life chasing emotionally unavailable men.

Or you'll spend your whole life

just banging your head against a wall.

Is there something wrong with the front of me?

These guys are staring.

I think they're just smiling at you.

♪ That gold won't bring you happiness ♪

But you've been brainwashed into thinking that, man.

It's very bourgeois.

Dude, monogamy was an idea...

... created by the elite

to control the middle class.

Meanwhile, all the priests were fucking the altar boys

and the aristocrats were fucking everything that moves.

Same now as it ever was.

And the most ambitious guys?

They're always the horniest.

Like you and me, baby.

And of course, women are attracted to that.

But then, if you don't make

their dreams come true, they make you suffer.

That's why it's safer to stick with whores.

Excuse me.

No.

Hmm?

Mia, Mia!

- What are you doing? - It's okay.

Buonasera!

Those were the two girls...

- Ciao! Ragazze! - Hi! Buonasera.

- Lovely to meet you. - Ciao. How are you?

You know, the girls.

How are you guys. How you guys doing?

Um, fine.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

I'm Cameron, this is my buddy Ethan.

- Hi, hi, hello. - Hi, Cameron.

- I am Lucia. - Lucia.

- Yes, and... - Lucia.

- Yes, and she is Mia. - Mia.

- Mia. - Hi, Mia.

Are you guys from here? Are you on vacation, what?

- Um, we're from Sicily. - From Sicily?

- Mm-hmm. - Just two gals hanging out in a hotel bar, huh?

- Yeah. - You guys having fun?

You guys, uh, you guys party?

Yes, yes!

You got any, uh... party favors?

I have pills.

You...

I have Viagra.

We don't need Viagra.

No? Also, maybe Molly.

Oh, my God.

Are you kidding me?

Are you an angel sent from heaven?

No, but these are expensive, guys.

You will have to pay for it.

I got money, baby. That's one thing I do got.

- Let's fun! - Let's fun!

This is the only snack I could find.

Want some?

You still high or what?

Hi.

So...

has Ethan changed at all?

No.

No, not at all. He's exactly the same.

That's good!

'Cause I've seen a lot of guys who are, like...

Well, not nerds. I mean, Ethan's not a nerd, but...

Yes, he is. He is!

I just mean, like,

they were never players.

And then they make all this money

and they just start acting different and, like,

cheating.

No. No, Ethan would never do that.

He's not like that. He's...

he's honest to a fault. He's...

God, I'm so glad that Cameron has a friend like Ethan.

Honestly, the guys that Cameron works with...

... a very dark triad.

Like, for real.

- Psychopaths. I'm not kidding. - Hmm.

But not Cameron.

No. Cameron's, like, naughty, like a little boy is naughty.

These other guys?

I mean, they're like Bernie Madoff monsters.

They will fuck you up.

And they're the most successful guys in finance.

Oh, Jesus!

Oh, shit, this is cold.

I got sensitive nips.

- Hey. - Hey.

- Beer? - Oh, thank you.

How was your day?

Uh, pretty grim... ... actually.

- Hmm. - I feel like if I murdered my boss,

I could argue it was euthanasia.

Yeah. Uh, what about you?

How's your night?

Better now.

Oh.

Sorry. Um,

was... was I...

No, uh... No, no, that was... it's fine.

I... I just wasn't expecting it, you know?

- Well, expect it. - Okay.

Is everything okay?

Yeah! Yeah, everything's... I'm just...

It's been a long day.

And I'm just kinda fried, I think.

- Mm. Yeah. - Yeah.

Do you wanna go back to my room or...

Yeah, no. I think I just need to crash.

- If that's okay? - Yeah, yeah. I think me too.

- Sorry. - N... no, it's fine. You...

I mean, we could hang out tomorrow.

- Are you around tomorrow? - Yes, absolutely.

I would love that. Um...

Do you want me to walk you back to your room?

- Um, sure. - Great, okay.

- Oh, don't forget your beer. - Oh, thanks. Sorry.

- You got your stuff? - Yeah.

Um, thanks for the beer.

Yeah. No problem.

I hope I didn't make you feel weird.

- No. No, no. - Yeah, yeah.

Don't... don't apologize. Honestly.

- Daphne? - Hmm?

Do you think Cameron ever cheats on you?

Maybe just once.

That I know about.

Don't feel bad for me.

I figured out how to handle it.

Like today.

I do what I want.

So, I'm not resentful.

Yeah. How do you handle it?

I...

I'm not a victim.

That's all I meant.

Hey! Open the door!

Come on!

What are you doing in there, man? Hello?

Open up, come on!

Sweet little baby boy.

Come on, go see him.

He's a little shy. Go see shy boy.

Take care of him.

Take care of her! Grazie!

What are you doing, little shy boy?

Come on! Bring him over.

Hey, big boy.

No?

Okay.

Hey, this is Ethan.

Sorry I can't take your call. Leave a message.

- Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com -