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1
00:00:06,049 --> 00:00:08,312
[wind whistling]
2
00:00:16,059 --> 00:00:18,627
As the caretaker
of Lanceton Fashion Plaza,
3
00:00:18,627 --> 00:00:20,455
I have loads
of important duties.
4
00:00:20,455 --> 00:00:23,284
For example, every morning
I flip these switches.
5
00:00:23,284 --> 00:00:24,763
I don't know what they do,
but I flip 'em.
6
00:00:24,763 --> 00:00:25,982
[thud]
7
00:00:25,982 --> 00:00:27,853
Yeah, what are these?
8
00:00:27,853 --> 00:00:29,899
A big part of what I do
9
00:00:29,899 --> 00:00:31,640
is unlocking the door
in the morning.
10
00:00:31,640 --> 00:00:34,251
If I don't do that,
I can't lock it at night.
11
00:00:34,251 --> 00:00:36,775
Which is a huge part
of what I do.
12
00:00:36,775 --> 00:00:38,777
The mall's best days
are behind her,
13
00:00:38,777 --> 00:00:41,563
but you should've seen
this place in the heyday.
14
00:00:41,563 --> 00:00:44,261
It was filled with shoppers,
horny teens,
15
00:00:44,261 --> 00:00:46,089
and the perverts
that come with them.
16
00:00:46,089 --> 00:00:47,656
We still get some people.
17
00:00:47,656 --> 00:00:49,092
Those are my bridge players.
18
00:00:49,092 --> 00:00:50,702
A lively bunch,
but I'm pretty sure
19
00:00:50,702 --> 00:00:52,269
the guy in the hat is dead.
20
00:00:52,269 --> 00:00:54,837
- [thud]
- Oh! Never mind. He moved.
21
00:00:54,837 --> 00:00:58,362
In the heyday, this fountain
was the centerpiece of the LFP.
22
00:00:58,362 --> 00:01:00,190
There was a water show synchronized
23
00:01:00,190 --> 00:01:02,540
to the Young Guns II soundtrack.
24
00:01:02,540 --> 00:01:04,368
People used to come
from all over town
25
00:01:04,368 --> 00:01:06,153
to watch her gush and squirt.
26
00:01:06,153 --> 00:01:08,068
And when I say people,
I mean perverts.
27
00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:09,286
Lot's of 'em.
28
00:01:09,286 --> 00:01:11,332
This used to be Macy's.
29
00:01:11,332 --> 00:01:13,725
But we don't have
an anchor store at the moment.
30
00:01:13,725 --> 00:01:15,423
The owner of the mall,
Mr. Javitz,
31
00:01:15,423 --> 00:01:17,686
is away working on
finding a new tenant.
32
00:01:17,686 --> 00:01:19,949
And he's got a pretty big fish
on the line.
33
00:01:19,949 --> 00:01:21,559
It's a secret.
34
00:01:21,559 --> 00:01:23,953
[whispering]
The secret belongs to Victoria.
35
00:01:23,953 --> 00:01:25,302
[normal voice]
That's all I know.
36
00:01:25,302 --> 00:01:27,957
I'm hoping
for a big ol' Talbot's.
37
00:01:27,957 --> 00:01:31,352
[American Dad! theme
playing on speakers]
38
00:01:31,352 --> 00:01:32,831
[signs buzzing]
39
00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:38,054
♪
40
00:01:38,054 --> 00:01:40,143
A lot of people ask me
why I don't just quit.
41
00:01:40,143 --> 00:01:41,971
"Malls are dying," they say.
42
00:01:41,971 --> 00:01:43,581
But if Mr. Javitz
hasn't given up,
43
00:01:43,581 --> 00:01:45,061
there's no way I can.
44
00:01:45,061 --> 00:01:47,585
He is the greatest man
I've ever known.
45
00:01:47,585 --> 00:01:49,239
Kind, generous,
46
00:01:49,239 --> 00:01:50,980
and he knows basically
everything about rugby.
47
00:01:50,980 --> 00:01:52,721
- [microphone thumps]
- [muffled] What are you doing?!
48
00:01:52,721 --> 00:01:55,158
Yeah, this doesn't seem like
it's gonna be a good movie.
49
00:01:55,158 --> 00:01:56,942
What's wrong?
Am I not talking enough?
50
00:01:56,942 --> 00:01:59,031
We wanna make a documentary
about something fun!
51
00:01:59,031 --> 00:02:00,424
[gasps]
Like monster trucks!
52
00:02:00,424 --> 00:02:02,209
Vroom! Vroom!
53
00:02:02,209 --> 00:02:05,081
Yeah! Monster trucks!
They're so loud and so big!
54
00:02:05,081 --> 00:02:07,475
- Vroom! Vroom!
- Vroom-vroom!
55
00:02:10,478 --> 00:02:13,133
Why can't I go to the good mall
and get a summer job there?
56
00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:15,091
Because that's our mall,
57
00:02:15,091 --> 00:02:17,702
and we don't want to risk
running into you.
58
00:02:17,702 --> 00:02:21,228
Don't take this the wrong way,
but... you're kind of a nerd.
59
00:02:21,228 --> 00:02:23,273
What is the right way
to take that?
60
00:02:23,273 --> 00:02:24,883
Not like that.
61
00:02:24,883 --> 00:02:27,147
Now if you'll excuse us,
we have a very important
62
00:02:27,147 --> 00:02:28,887
family meeting
at Buca di Beppo
63
00:02:28,887 --> 00:02:31,716
to discuss the plan
for our new food truck.
64
00:02:31,716 --> 00:02:33,240
Why can't I work on that?
65
00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:34,632
Because it's our idea.
66
00:02:34,632 --> 00:02:35,851
You weren't there
when we thought of it.
67
00:02:35,851 --> 00:02:37,548
I'll always remember it.
68
00:02:37,548 --> 00:02:40,769
You weren't there, and then,
bam, it came to us--
69
00:02:40,769 --> 00:02:42,901
fish sticks,
but on a truck!
70
00:02:42,901 --> 00:02:45,339
Now all we need is
the perfect food-truck name.
71
00:02:45,339 --> 00:02:46,731
I've got some ideas!
72
00:02:46,731 --> 00:02:48,255
No, you're not
allowed to name it.
73
00:02:48,255 --> 00:02:50,170
It's gonna be
some gross sex pun.
74
00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:52,563
You gotta have
a gross sex pun
75
00:02:52,563 --> 00:02:55,262
to rise to the top
of the food-truck game!
76
00:02:55,262 --> 00:02:57,916
It gets attention and it makes
the food taste better.
77
00:02:57,916 --> 00:02:59,788
There's no way it makes
the food taste better.
78
00:02:59,788 --> 00:03:01,181
Uhp!
Save it for the Beps!
79
00:03:02,269 --> 00:03:03,618
[tires screech]
80
00:03:03,618 --> 00:03:05,489
[sighs]
81
00:03:05,489 --> 00:03:07,361
- [silly horn honks]
- STAN: The Beps is this way!
82
00:03:10,277 --> 00:03:12,279
Oh, Mr. Javitz,
I'm starting to think
83
00:03:12,279 --> 00:03:14,455
we'll never get back
to the heyday.
84
00:03:14,455 --> 00:03:17,762
I can't remember the last time
we had any youth in here.
85
00:03:17,762 --> 00:03:20,722
And where there's no youth,
there's no perverts, obviously.
86
00:03:20,722 --> 00:03:22,419
Holy youth-a-mole!
87
00:03:22,419 --> 00:03:24,465
A youth!
88
00:03:24,465 --> 00:03:27,294
The heyday is back, Mr. Javitz!
89
00:03:27,294 --> 00:03:30,166
Smells like an old
fish tank in here.
90
00:03:30,166 --> 00:03:31,907
Young boy! Stop!
91
00:03:31,907 --> 00:03:33,256
Where you goin'
with that smooth skin?
92
00:03:33,256 --> 00:03:34,779
I'm looking for a job,
93
00:03:34,779 --> 00:03:37,086
but it seems like there
aren't any stores here?
94
00:03:37,086 --> 00:03:38,479
Well, why work for a store
95
00:03:38,479 --> 00:03:40,132
when you can work
for the whole mall?
96
00:03:40,132 --> 00:03:44,224
Erastus Junipero Horton,
mall caretaker.
97
00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:47,662
I don't know if I want
to work for you, Erastus.
98
00:03:47,662 --> 00:03:49,533
Hey! I don't know
if I want to hire you!
99
00:03:49,533 --> 00:03:53,276
That's why we do the interview,
you cocky S-O-B!
100
00:03:53,276 --> 00:03:56,279
No college degree,
no high-school degree.
101
00:03:56,279 --> 00:03:58,020
And you don't
have a résumé.
102
00:03:58,020 --> 00:04:00,022
I had to grab this paper
from the printer
103
00:04:00,022 --> 00:04:01,328
just to give you a chance.
104
00:04:01,328 --> 00:04:03,068
And look at it.
It's blank!
105
00:04:03,068 --> 00:04:04,809
Steve, do you even
want to work here?
106
00:04:04,809 --> 00:04:06,202
- No!
- Hmm.
107
00:04:06,202 --> 00:04:07,551
Interesting.
And why is that?
108
00:04:07,551 --> 00:04:09,205
This place is awful!
109
00:04:09,205 --> 00:04:12,077
- I gotta have you! You're hired!
- What? Why?
110
00:04:12,077 --> 00:04:14,471
I like that you weren't afraid
to give me bad answers.
111
00:04:14,471 --> 00:04:15,951
Come on.
I'll show you around.
112
00:04:15,951 --> 00:04:17,779
This is the food court.
113
00:04:17,779 --> 00:04:19,650
There's only one restaurant
right now,
114
00:04:19,650 --> 00:04:21,826
but that should change
when Mr. Javitz comes back.
115
00:04:21,826 --> 00:04:23,045
"Sloatmeal"?
116
00:04:23,045 --> 00:04:25,134
Yep. Slow oatmeal.
117
00:04:25,134 --> 00:04:27,310
If you're hungry, I hope you
brought something from home
118
00:04:27,310 --> 00:04:28,746
because at Sloatmeal
you have to order
119
00:04:28,746 --> 00:04:30,574
24 hours in advance.
120
00:04:30,574 --> 00:04:32,054
So it's not
just a clever name.
121
00:04:32,054 --> 00:04:34,056
I'm not even sure
it's that.
122
00:04:34,056 --> 00:04:36,058
With so many stores closing,
123
00:04:36,058 --> 00:04:38,321
we've got a lot
of mannequins lying around.
124
00:04:38,321 --> 00:04:40,149
You find any loosies,
you throw 'em in here.
125
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:46,242
Uh, Steve? Her dead,
flesh-colored eyes are up here.
126
00:04:46,242 --> 00:04:49,071
Man, you are a lawsuit
waitin' to happen.
127
00:04:49,071 --> 00:04:51,291
One of your main
responsibilities:
128
00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:53,031
watering the plants.
129
00:04:53,031 --> 00:04:55,120
- These look fake.
- Oh, they are!
130
00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:57,297
But Mr. Javitz likes
for them to look wet.
131
00:04:57,297 --> 00:05:00,125
Roger, why do you bother
with this place?
132
00:05:00,125 --> 00:05:02,171
Mr. Javitz
is the first person
133
00:05:02,171 --> 00:05:04,956
to ever trust me
with this much responsibility.
134
00:05:04,956 --> 00:05:07,219
And when a great man
shines his light on you...
135
00:05:07,219 --> 00:05:09,265
Mmm-mmm-mmm!
136
00:05:09,265 --> 00:05:12,703
Like an ant catchin' some rays
under a magnifying glass.
137
00:05:12,703 --> 00:05:14,618
All right.
Enjoy your first day!
138
00:05:15,967 --> 00:05:18,361
Did I even agree
to work here?
139
00:05:18,361 --> 00:05:20,537
I guess so.
140
00:05:20,537 --> 00:05:23,714
Steve! You hungry?
We got extra oatmeal.
141
00:05:23,714 --> 00:05:25,499
Mmm-mmm!
142
00:05:25,499 --> 00:05:26,848
Tuttle,
do you work here?
143
00:05:26,848 --> 00:05:29,372
No! I just come here
to exercise.
144
00:05:29,372 --> 00:05:31,026
So I've gotten
to know the crew.
145
00:05:31,026 --> 00:05:32,375
Hi. I'm Lafrantz.
146
00:05:32,375 --> 00:05:35,770
I own and operate
Suitfather Part Two.
147
00:05:35,770 --> 00:05:37,467
Why "Part Two"?
148
00:05:37,467 --> 00:05:40,470
Suitfather Part One
used to be across the hall.
149
00:05:40,470 --> 00:05:42,037
In the heyday,
this part of the mall
150
00:05:42,037 --> 00:05:44,561
was packed
with discount suit stores.
151
00:05:44,561 --> 00:05:48,391
There was Suitfather Part One, Suitplantation,
152
00:05:48,391 --> 00:05:50,219
These Suits
Were Made For Buying,
153
00:05:50,219 --> 00:05:52,787
Suitar Center,
Suit Life of Zack & Cody,
154
00:05:52,787 --> 00:05:54,615
and Zoot Suit Buy-It.
155
00:05:54,615 --> 00:05:57,705
Now I'm the only one left.
156
00:05:57,705 --> 00:06:00,490
With everything closing, why
don't you move somewhere else?
157
00:06:00,490 --> 00:06:03,145
I don't know. I guess
I'm attached to this place.
158
00:06:03,145 --> 00:06:04,712
There's a lot of
good people here.
159
00:06:04,712 --> 00:06:07,062
- Hello.
- That's Shania.
160
00:06:07,062 --> 00:06:09,717
She runs Tender Hellos,
161
00:06:09,717 --> 00:06:12,284
a very specific
greeting-card store.
162
00:06:13,938 --> 00:06:15,592
STEVE:
That is specific.
163
00:06:15,592 --> 00:06:19,074
Steve! It's terrible!
They're gonna demolish the mall!
164
00:06:19,074 --> 00:06:21,119
That seems like
it could be the right move.
165
00:06:21,816 --> 00:06:24,340
Stop! There are
people inside!
166
00:06:24,340 --> 00:06:26,386
Not that many people,
but enough!
167
00:06:26,386 --> 00:06:29,171
Relax! We're not
gonna blow it up now.
168
00:06:29,171 --> 00:06:31,695
That's right!
We love to blow stuff up.
169
00:06:31,695 --> 00:06:33,305
And we got so excited
170
00:06:33,305 --> 00:06:36,091
that we came here
exactly one month early!
171
00:06:36,091 --> 00:06:37,875
Well, you can't
blow up the mall
172
00:06:37,875 --> 00:06:39,486
without Mr. Javitz's
permission!
173
00:06:39,486 --> 00:06:41,662
Oh, yes, we can!
174
00:06:41,662 --> 00:06:43,794
[gasps]
Evil bankers!
175
00:06:43,794 --> 00:06:48,190
Mr. Javitz hasn't been making
his mortgage payments.
176
00:06:48,190 --> 00:06:50,801
If you can't get the money
by next month,
177
00:06:50,801 --> 00:06:55,545
we're going to demolish the mall
and build condos!
178
00:06:55,545 --> 00:06:58,722
Condos? The worst
of all residences!
179
00:06:58,722 --> 00:07:00,898
Steve, Mr. Javitz
is gonna come through
180
00:07:00,898 --> 00:07:03,553
with that anchor store,
but we gotta buy him some time.
181
00:07:03,553 --> 00:07:04,815
Okay. Fine.
182
00:07:04,815 --> 00:07:06,556
Oh, thank you!
183
00:07:06,556 --> 00:07:08,471
Check it out.
Got your wallet.
184
00:07:08,471 --> 00:07:10,473
Let's see.
What have we got here?
185
00:07:10,473 --> 00:07:12,867
Oh, my God!
You have a condom?
186
00:07:12,867 --> 00:07:16,261
Oh, no!
Oh, geez!
187
00:07:16,261 --> 00:07:18,089
How long has this
been in here?
188
00:07:18,089 --> 00:07:19,874
Kid's got a rubber!
Oh, my God!
189
00:07:19,874 --> 00:07:21,658
It's been in here so long,
190
00:07:21,658 --> 00:07:24,574
there's, like, a circle
indented into the leather!
191
00:07:24,574 --> 00:07:28,360
Oh, that is so sad.
That is so hilarious.
192
00:07:28,360 --> 00:07:29,927
I'm gonna tell everybody.
193
00:07:29,927 --> 00:07:32,277
Anyway, here you go. Thanks
again for helping me, Steve.
194
00:07:32,277 --> 00:07:34,105
I appreciate you so much.
195
00:07:34,236 --> 00:07:36,499
♪
196
00:07:36,499 --> 00:07:40,329
Okay. Stream of consciousness.
Let the ideas flow.
197
00:07:40,329 --> 00:07:43,941
Oh! What if we let a stream
flow through the mall?
198
00:07:43,941 --> 00:07:46,204
- Okay...
- Fine. Something else.
199
00:07:46,204 --> 00:07:48,293
We're trying to get back
to the heyday.
200
00:07:48,293 --> 00:07:50,382
The hey... day...
201
00:07:50,382 --> 00:07:52,384
Oh!
What about a hay day?
202
00:07:52,384 --> 00:07:55,039
We give everyone who comes
to the mall free hay!
203
00:07:55,039 --> 00:07:57,433
Maybe we're too bound
by hay.
204
00:07:57,433 --> 00:08:00,523
Do you think we could maybe
open it up to ideas beyond hay?
205
00:08:00,523 --> 00:08:02,482
What am I saying?
Hay's our bread and butter!
206
00:08:02,482 --> 00:08:04,875
[knock on door]
207
00:08:04,875 --> 00:08:06,660
What are they
doing here?
208
00:08:06,660 --> 00:08:09,227
I thought maybe it would help
to get some outside opinions.
209
00:08:09,227 --> 00:08:10,925
Sure. Sure.
All right.
210
00:08:10,925 --> 00:08:13,623
I guess my one question is,
if they have good ideas,
211
00:08:13,623 --> 00:08:16,539
wouldn't Mr. Javitz
have left them in charge?
212
00:08:16,539 --> 00:08:19,673
Roger, when was the last time
you talked to Mr. Javitz?
213
00:08:19,673 --> 00:08:23,241
Hmm. I would say...
9,000 sleeps?
214
00:08:23,241 --> 00:08:26,027
That's like...
25 years!
215
00:08:26,027 --> 00:08:28,943
Really? Wow!
I'm so good at waiting!
216
00:08:31,902 --> 00:08:33,948
Why is no one is eating
at our food truck?
217
00:08:33,948 --> 00:08:37,342
I don't get it.
We've got plenty of fish,
218
00:08:37,342 --> 00:08:39,736
which felt like it was
gonna be the biggest hurdle.
219
00:08:39,736 --> 00:08:43,044
It's the name!
Please let me change the name!
220
00:08:43,044 --> 00:08:44,741
But your idea
is so gross!
221
00:08:44,741 --> 00:08:47,570
[sighs] Fine.
What have we got to lose?
222
00:08:47,570 --> 00:08:49,529
KLAUS:
You won't regret this.
223
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:51,574
I need seven sticks--
five battered,
224
00:08:51,574 --> 00:08:53,097
two double-dipped--
on the fly!
225
00:08:53,097 --> 00:08:55,360
Look at all this cash!
We're rich!
226
00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:57,754
Hey, I saw the name of your
truck, and I laughed so hard
227
00:08:57,754 --> 00:08:59,234
I just had to try
your fish sticks!
228
00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:02,411
[gasps] Daniel!
You gotta get down here!
229
00:09:02,411 --> 00:09:06,763
The food is just okay,
but the name? Oh, man!
230
00:09:06,763 --> 00:09:08,852
It's kind of funny.
231
00:09:08,852 --> 00:09:10,724
Wear something nice.
232
00:09:10,724 --> 00:09:13,378
♪
233
00:09:13,378 --> 00:09:16,294
So, how can we get people
back in the mall?
234
00:09:16,294 --> 00:09:17,861
My daughter
saved her rec center
235
00:09:17,861 --> 00:09:20,647
by having
a dance competition.
236
00:09:20,647 --> 00:09:22,736
I don't wanna copy her exactly,
so maybe...
237
00:09:22,736 --> 00:09:24,607
ski race?
238
00:09:24,607 --> 00:09:28,916
I think Erastus the caretaker
is breeding wild dogs
239
00:09:28,916 --> 00:09:31,005
in the old
Miller's Outpost location.
240
00:09:31,005 --> 00:09:33,529
That's, uh...
not really an idea.
241
00:09:33,529 --> 00:09:35,270
No.
No, it's not.
242
00:09:36,532 --> 00:09:39,187
"I wish there was something
to eat besides oatmeal."
243
00:09:39,187 --> 00:09:41,493
You sell this card
in your store?
244
00:09:41,493 --> 00:09:43,060
But that's it!
245
00:09:43,060 --> 00:09:44,932
Roger, I've got it!
246
00:09:44,932 --> 00:09:47,412
What is the beating heart
of any mall?
247
00:09:47,412 --> 00:09:49,327
Mr. Javitz's
indomitable spirit?
248
00:09:49,327 --> 00:09:52,896
No! The food court!
The key is the food court!
249
00:09:52,896 --> 00:09:55,464
I don't know, Steve.
Unless you mean a food court
250
00:09:55,464 --> 00:09:57,205
with, like,
a big food judge!
251
00:09:57,205 --> 00:10:00,208
"I sentence you
to free hay!"
252
00:10:00,208 --> 00:10:01,688
No, Roger!
253
00:10:01,688 --> 00:10:03,690
We're gonna have
a food festival
254
00:10:03,690 --> 00:10:06,301
and fill the food court
with food trucks.
255
00:10:06,301 --> 00:10:09,086
Dad just texted me that
they have a whole fleet of them.
256
00:10:09,086 --> 00:10:10,697
They're doing really well, apparently.
257
00:10:10,697 --> 00:10:13,525
Well, I guess we could
tack that onto the hay idea.
258
00:10:13,525 --> 00:10:14,744
- Okay. Go for it.
- Yes!
259
00:10:14,744 --> 00:10:16,746
We're gonna
save the mall!
260
00:10:16,746 --> 00:10:19,575
Also, Tuttle says you're
breeding wild dogs here?
261
00:10:19,575 --> 00:10:23,492
If wild dogs are gonna be having
sex, which they are, a lot,
262
00:10:23,492 --> 00:10:26,060
I would rather it be
under my supervision, Steve.
263
00:10:26,060 --> 00:10:28,062
Don't bust my balls
on this.
264
00:10:28,062 --> 00:10:34,416
♪
265
00:10:34,416 --> 00:10:38,550
♪ Well, we've got a lot, a lot,
a lot of hard work today ♪
266
00:10:38,550 --> 00:10:41,510
♪ We've got to rock
at the government center ♪
267
00:10:41,510 --> 00:10:44,687
♪ And make the secretaries
feel better ♪
268
00:10:44,687 --> 00:10:47,864
♪ When they put those stamps
on the ledgers ♪
269
00:10:47,864 --> 00:10:52,347
♪ And they got a lot, a lot, a
lot of great desks and chairs ♪
270
00:10:52,347 --> 00:10:54,697
♪ Uh-huh,
at the government center ♪
271
00:10:54,697 --> 00:10:58,179
♪ We gotta make the secretaries
feel better ♪
272
00:10:58,179 --> 00:11:01,443
♪ When they put those stamps
on all those letters ♪
273
00:11:01,443 --> 00:11:05,490
♪ We've got to rock-a, rock-a,
rock-a non-stop tonight ♪
274
00:11:05,490 --> 00:11:07,667
♪ Uh-huh,
at the government center ♪
275
00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:11,627
♪ Make the secretaries
feel better ♪
276
00:11:11,627 --> 00:11:15,631
♪ When they put the stamps
on the ledgers ♪
277
00:11:16,893 --> 00:11:18,286
Gotta hand it to ya, Steve.
278
00:11:18,286 --> 00:11:20,375
You were dead wrong
about the hay.
279
00:11:20,375 --> 00:11:23,421
People showed up for it.
We have saved the mall!
280
00:11:23,421 --> 00:11:26,642
For now. But how long can
we really keep this going?
281
00:11:26,642 --> 00:11:28,513
We only have to hold on
until Mr. Javitz
282
00:11:28,513 --> 00:11:30,907
comes back with a tenant
for the anchor store!
283
00:11:30,907 --> 00:11:33,997
But, Roger, people
don't go to malls anymore.
284
00:11:33,997 --> 00:11:37,392
And, honestly, I don't think
Mr. Javitz is coming back.
285
00:11:37,392 --> 00:11:39,873
Steve, there are things
we don't joke about--
286
00:11:39,873 --> 00:11:41,657
Mr. Javitz not coming back
287
00:11:41,657 --> 00:11:43,267
and the time
I shit my pants
288
00:11:43,267 --> 00:11:45,313
playing racquetball
with Judd Apatow.
289
00:11:45,313 --> 00:11:47,445
You need to face it,
Roger!
290
00:11:47,445 --> 00:11:50,492
Mr. Javitz abandoned the mall,
and he abandoned you!
291
00:11:50,492 --> 00:11:52,276
You don't know that!
You don't know him!
292
00:11:52,276 --> 00:11:55,540
How could I?
He's been gone for 25 years!
293
00:11:55,540 --> 00:11:58,065
Please stop saying
"25 years"!
294
00:11:58,065 --> 00:12:00,720
[sobs wildly]
295
00:12:01,808 --> 00:12:02,983
Roger?
296
00:12:06,638 --> 00:12:08,205
[Roger sniffling]
297
00:12:08,205 --> 00:12:09,598
Roger?
298
00:12:09,598 --> 00:12:11,208
[whimpering]
299
00:12:11,208 --> 00:12:14,385
Roger, I'm sorry.
I know I was a little harsh.
300
00:12:14,385 --> 00:12:16,083
Here.
301
00:12:18,259 --> 00:12:22,219
I just worry that with the mall
you're hanging on too tight.
302
00:12:22,219 --> 00:12:24,482
Maybe it's time
to let go and admit
303
00:12:24,482 --> 00:12:26,615
that Mr. Javitz isn't gonna
walk through that door.
304
00:12:26,615 --> 00:12:29,226
You're right, Steve.
He isn't.
305
00:12:29,226 --> 00:12:30,750
Because he's gonna
float through it!
306
00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,795
And here he comes now!
307
00:12:32,795 --> 00:12:34,623
[haunting organ music plays]
308
00:12:34,623 --> 00:12:36,930
[Steve screaming]
309
00:12:36,930 --> 00:12:39,410
ROGER: Returning from
the dark realm.
310
00:12:39,410 --> 00:12:42,762
Floats like a butterfly,
floats like a bee.
311
00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:46,200
It's... the J Man!
Mr. Javitz!
312
00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:48,202
And this is Steve.
313
00:12:49,638 --> 00:12:50,944
Steve,
you're blowing it.
314
00:12:50,944 --> 00:12:52,989
Jesus. Call some girls
or something.
315
00:12:53,381 --> 00:12:55,731
♪
316
00:12:55,731 --> 00:12:57,341
Wh--What's happening?
317
00:12:57,341 --> 00:12:59,474
Mr. Javitz
is a warlock, Steve!
318
00:12:59,474 --> 00:13:02,085
This is why I was always
calling him the bone man.
319
00:13:02,085 --> 00:13:03,826
You never
called him that!
320
00:13:03,826 --> 00:13:06,133
Let's not play
"who said bone man when."
321
00:13:06,133 --> 00:13:07,917
All I know
is that years ago,
322
00:13:07,917 --> 00:13:10,964
I looked into Mr. Javitz's
glowing red eyes.
323
00:13:10,964 --> 00:13:13,793
And I've been doing
his heinous bidding ever since.
324
00:13:13,793 --> 00:13:16,534
And I never looked back,
unless I was bid to.
325
00:13:16,534 --> 00:13:18,885
It's simple, Steve!
326
00:13:18,885 --> 00:13:21,888
You see, the mall...
327
00:13:21,888 --> 00:13:23,933
is hungry.
328
00:13:23,933 --> 00:13:25,935
- Duh!
- It is built
329
00:13:25,935 --> 00:13:31,158
on an ancient evil spring
from which I draw my power!
330
00:13:31,158 --> 00:13:34,857
And whenever it gets hungry,
every 25 years or so,
331
00:13:34,857 --> 00:13:37,120
the fountain awakens
332
00:13:37,120 --> 00:13:40,384
and I help it feed
on the living!
333
00:13:40,384 --> 00:13:43,126
W-What's in it for you?
Eternal life?
334
00:13:43,126 --> 00:13:45,389
No, no.
I already have that.
335
00:13:45,389 --> 00:13:47,957
I guess I just do it
to be nice!
336
00:13:47,957 --> 00:13:50,960
So all the people who came
to my food festival...
337
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:53,615
my family...
they're gonna die?
338
00:13:53,615 --> 00:13:56,748
The food festival
was your idea?
339
00:13:56,748 --> 00:13:58,402
So smart!
340
00:13:58,402 --> 00:14:01,710
You brought in
so many souls!
341
00:14:01,710 --> 00:14:03,625
Let's not downplay
the free hay.
342
00:14:03,625 --> 00:14:05,801
Steve, do you think
343
00:14:05,801 --> 00:14:08,935
you would ever
want to maybe...
344
00:14:08,935 --> 00:14:11,894
look into
my glowing red eyes
345
00:14:11,894 --> 00:14:14,984
and become bound to me
forevermore?
346
00:14:14,984 --> 00:14:16,594
But you've
already got me!
347
00:14:16,594 --> 00:14:18,683
Yes, but Steve is...
348
00:14:18,683 --> 00:14:20,337
what's the word...
349
00:14:20,337 --> 00:14:21,686
better?
350
00:14:22,687 --> 00:14:24,298
Go after him!
351
00:14:24,298 --> 00:14:25,908
Obviously, I'm gonna
do this for you,
352
00:14:25,908 --> 00:14:28,737
but before I go,
could I maybe just look into
353
00:14:28,737 --> 00:14:30,913
your glowing red eyes
for like one second?
354
00:14:30,913 --> 00:14:32,915
Uhh...
maybe later, dude.
355
00:14:32,915 --> 00:14:34,917
Totally get it. Totally get it.
Keep on rockin'.
356
00:14:34,917 --> 00:14:37,877
"Keep on rockin'"?
What-- He's a warlock!
357
00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:39,661
That's the best
you could come up with?
358
00:14:39,661 --> 00:14:41,054
You're losing him!
359
00:14:41,054 --> 00:14:43,795
Lafrantz! We gotta
evacuate the mall!
360
00:14:43,795 --> 00:14:45,319
Everyone's gonna die!
361
00:14:45,319 --> 00:14:46,711
Whoa. Easy.
362
00:14:46,711 --> 00:14:48,757
Sounds like
you met Mr. Javitz!
363
00:14:48,757 --> 00:14:51,629
Oh, no! Are you
working with him, too?
364
00:14:51,629 --> 00:14:53,936
[laughs]
No. Relax!
365
00:14:53,936 --> 00:14:55,590
When Mr. Javitz
feeds the mall,
366
00:14:55,590 --> 00:14:59,159
anyone it consumes has
their soul trapped here forever.
367
00:14:59,159 --> 00:15:02,162
I'm trapped here
until my soul fades away
368
00:15:02,162 --> 00:15:04,947
and I become a mannequin,
just like the others.
369
00:15:04,947 --> 00:15:06,862
The mannequins
were people?
370
00:15:06,862 --> 00:15:09,038
Those of us who haven't
turned into mannequins yet
371
00:15:09,038 --> 00:15:11,040
were trying
to keep people away
372
00:15:11,040 --> 00:15:14,000
by running terrible,
terrible stores.
373
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:16,176
Is everyone in the mall
a ghost?
374
00:15:16,176 --> 00:15:18,439
No, but we don't have time
to go through that now.
375
00:15:18,439 --> 00:15:20,006
I'll tell you later.
376
00:15:20,006 --> 00:15:22,747
Listen. Shania and I have
a plan to save everyone.
377
00:15:22,747 --> 00:15:24,488
- Hi.
- [screams]
378
00:15:24,488 --> 00:15:27,013
Mr. Javitz draws his power
from the fountain.
379
00:15:27,013 --> 00:15:29,232
So we'll have to
destroy it.
380
00:15:29,232 --> 00:15:31,321
Fortunately, the mall is
already wired with explosives
381
00:15:31,321 --> 00:15:32,844
from the demolitions crew.
382
00:15:32,844 --> 00:15:35,238
If we use those
to destroy the fountain,
383
00:15:35,238 --> 00:15:37,588
the mall will never
be able to eat again.
384
00:15:37,588 --> 00:15:40,548
I mean, I follow you,
but if anyone
385
00:15:40,548 --> 00:15:43,464
was high in their dorm room
trying to understand,
386
00:15:43,464 --> 00:15:46,597
they might want to splash
some water on their face
387
00:15:46,597 --> 00:15:49,165
and do a little rewind.
388
00:15:49,165 --> 00:15:51,124
Let's do this!
389
00:15:51,124 --> 00:15:54,954
♪
390
00:16:01,395 --> 00:16:04,964
Oh, Mr. Javitz.
Where did I lose you?
391
00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:07,053
"You are here."
392
00:16:07,053 --> 00:16:09,664
That's right.
And I always will be.
393
00:16:09,664 --> 00:16:12,101
♪
394
00:16:12,101 --> 00:16:14,886
♪ Before he was here
395
00:16:14,886 --> 00:16:16,714
♪ You were here
396
00:16:16,714 --> 00:16:19,239
♪ And so was I
397
00:16:19,239 --> 00:16:21,893
♪ To my surprise
398
00:16:21,893 --> 00:16:24,461
♪ I was hypnotized
399
00:16:24,461 --> 00:16:27,987
♪ By your glowing red eyes
400
00:16:27,987 --> 00:16:30,467
♪ You are here
401
00:16:30,467 --> 00:16:35,820
♪ And so am I!
402
00:16:36,865 --> 00:16:39,085
Everyone run!
There's an evil warlock!
403
00:16:39,085 --> 00:16:40,782
Nice try, buddy.
404
00:16:40,782 --> 00:16:43,611
You gotta wait your turn
for Donut Whore.
405
00:16:43,611 --> 00:16:48,616
♪ You believe you found
something in Steve ♪
406
00:16:48,616 --> 00:16:54,622
♪ But he won't help you
kill them all ♪
407
00:16:54,622 --> 00:17:00,280
♪ He won't help you
feed the mall ♪
408
00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:02,804
♪ You are here
409
00:17:02,804 --> 00:17:08,679
♪ And so am I!
410
00:17:08,679 --> 00:17:11,117
♪
411
00:17:11,117 --> 00:17:13,032
The sprinklers
aren't strong enough!
412
00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:15,556
Through the old Baby Gap
to safety!
413
00:17:15,556 --> 00:17:17,471
You know, a lot of
my girlfriends ask me
414
00:17:17,471 --> 00:17:19,299
what I see in you, Mr. J.,
415
00:17:19,299 --> 00:17:21,692
why I stick by you
when you treat me like this.
416
00:17:21,692 --> 00:17:23,477
And I say, "Listen, girls.
417
00:17:23,477 --> 00:17:26,871
He's hypnotized me
with his glowing red eyes!"
418
00:17:26,871 --> 00:17:29,483
♪ You are here
419
00:17:29,483 --> 00:17:34,444
♪ And so am I
420
00:17:34,444 --> 00:17:37,143
♪ One look at Steve
421
00:17:37,143 --> 00:17:39,710
♪ Made me believe
422
00:17:39,710 --> 00:17:45,107
♪ He will help me
kill them all ♪
423
00:17:45,107 --> 00:17:49,503
♪ He will help me
feed the mall! ♪
424
00:17:49,503 --> 00:17:50,939
[crowd shouting]
425
00:17:50,939 --> 00:17:53,420
♪ He is here
426
00:17:53,420 --> 00:17:55,596
♪ And so
427
00:17:55,596 --> 00:17:56,988
♪ So am I!
428
00:17:56,988 --> 00:17:58,512
[cackles evilly]
429
00:17:58,512 --> 00:18:01,384
♪ I should walk away
430
00:18:01,384 --> 00:18:04,039
♪ I should let go
431
00:18:04,039 --> 00:18:10,132
♪ I should admit
that this is over ♪
432
00:18:10,132 --> 00:18:13,004
♪ But I don't know how
433
00:18:13,004 --> 00:18:17,922
♪ And that's
the theeeeeeme ♪
434
00:18:17,922 --> 00:18:20,621
♪ You are here
435
00:18:20,621 --> 00:18:23,189
♪ And so
436
00:18:23,189 --> 00:18:28,411
♪ Am I
437
00:18:31,197 --> 00:18:34,200
Awaken, my evil spring!
438
00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:37,377
It is time for your feast!
439
00:18:37,377 --> 00:18:40,989
Also, I gotta tell you
about this kid Steve I met.
440
00:18:40,989 --> 00:18:43,165
He's amazing!
441
00:18:43,165 --> 00:18:46,212
Wut da heck is dis?
442
00:18:46,212 --> 00:18:47,996
STEVE: They're all gone,
Mr. Javitz!
443
00:18:47,996 --> 00:18:49,780
I saved them all!
444
00:18:49,780 --> 00:18:52,174
I told you
he was amazing!
445
00:18:52,174 --> 00:18:54,524
Steve, are you sure
446
00:18:54,524 --> 00:18:58,746
you don't want to even glance
into my glowing red eyes?
447
00:18:58,746 --> 00:19:00,791
He's not interested!
448
00:19:00,791 --> 00:19:03,142
Mr. Javitz,
you took everything from me,
449
00:19:03,142 --> 00:19:06,188
and now I'm taking
everything from you.
450
00:19:06,188 --> 00:19:08,625
And that's
perfectly suitable!
451
00:19:10,105 --> 00:19:11,759
Nooooo!
452
00:19:11,759 --> 00:19:14,153
[grunting] Or...
453
00:19:15,284 --> 00:19:16,851
Lafrantz! No!
454
00:19:16,851 --> 00:19:19,027
ROGER: Nooooooo!
455
00:19:19,027 --> 00:19:20,594
I never should've
hired you!
456
00:19:20,594 --> 00:19:21,769
Aah!
457
00:19:21,769 --> 00:19:27,383
♪
458
00:19:27,383 --> 00:19:31,039
I can't lose you, Steve!
459
00:19:31,039 --> 00:19:33,172
Those glowing eyes.
460
00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:35,391
They're so... red.
461
00:19:35,391 --> 00:19:39,787
MR. JAVITZ:
At last you are mine!
462
00:19:39,787 --> 00:19:41,658
Are you frickin'
kidding me?
463
00:19:41,658 --> 00:19:44,008
Aah!
464
00:19:44,008 --> 00:19:47,360
[screaming]
465
00:19:47,360 --> 00:19:49,449
Do you think
he'll be okay, Steve?
466
00:19:49,449 --> 00:19:51,538
I just want him to learn
a lesson, you know?
467
00:19:51,538 --> 00:19:53,496
MR. JAVITZ: This fountain
is the one thing
468
00:19:53,496 --> 00:19:56,804
that can destroy me
forever!
469
00:19:56,804 --> 00:19:59,023
Do you think he heard me
or did he say that randomly?
470
00:19:59,023 --> 00:20:00,634
He's so random.
471
00:20:00,634 --> 00:20:02,592
It's one of the things
I like most about him.
472
00:20:02,592 --> 00:20:04,681
After his glowing red eyes,
of course.
473
00:20:04,681 --> 00:20:05,943
[screams]
474
00:20:05,943 --> 00:20:07,554
[bubbling]
475
00:20:07,554 --> 00:20:09,556
[whoosh]
476
00:20:09,556 --> 00:20:12,254
♪
477
00:20:13,995 --> 00:20:16,215
All those years
of loyal service,
478
00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:18,608
and he still
couldn't see me.
479
00:20:18,608 --> 00:20:21,611
You were right, Steve.
I had to let go.
480
00:20:21,611 --> 00:20:24,179
- Steve? Are you listening to me?
- [fingers snap]
481
00:20:24,179 --> 00:20:26,616
[electricity pulsating]
482
00:20:26,616 --> 00:20:29,489
Oh, man.
Javitz got you good!
483
00:20:29,489 --> 00:20:31,621
I've been there, buddy.
Enjoy the ride.
484
00:20:31,621 --> 00:20:33,362
It's rewarding as hell.
485
00:20:34,929 --> 00:20:36,757
Okay, Dadders,
it's time to answer
486
00:20:36,757 --> 00:20:39,368
Steve's question
about who was a ghost.
487
00:20:39,368 --> 00:20:41,457
Me and Shania? Ghosts!
488
00:20:41,457 --> 00:20:43,459
The guy who ran the
Bazooka Sharks Socks Store?
489
00:20:43,459 --> 00:20:45,244
Not a ghost!
490
00:20:45,244 --> 00:20:46,897
The lady who ran
the oatmeal store?
491
00:20:46,897 --> 00:20:48,595
G-G-G-Ghost!
492
00:20:48,595 --> 00:20:52,076
The documentary crew?
One ghost, one regular!
493
00:20:52,076 --> 00:20:56,690
Tuttle? You bet your ass
he was a [bleep] ghost!
494
00:20:56,690 --> 00:20:58,257
Bye! Have a beautiful time!
495
00:20:58,307 --> 00:21:02,857
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