All language subtitles for The Monkees 219 Monkees Paw.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,795 --> 00:00:01,658 Back, back home 2 00:00:01,858 --> 00:00:04,092 I’m goin’ down back, back 3 00:00:05,094 --> 00:00:06,519 I’m goin’ home 4 00:00:09,531 --> 00:00:12,676 I'm get go, get go, get go back 5 00:00:12,876 --> 00:00:14,791 Back, back in home. Down, down, down... 6 00:00:14,991 --> 00:00:16,389 Okay! You're hired. 7 00:00:16,589 --> 00:00:17,710 Yay! 8 00:00:17,910 --> 00:00:20,351 Yeah, thank you! Oh lovely! Oh beautiful! 9 00:00:20,551 --> 00:00:21,486 Wait! 10 00:00:21,686 --> 00:00:22,414 That's lovely! 11 00:00:22,614 --> 00:00:24,021 All I'm offering... is money. 12 00:00:24,221 --> 00:00:25,921 - Yeah, money! - Money! Oh! 13 00:00:26,121 --> 00:00:30,745 Excuse me, Mr. Manager, but, but what about me? Mendrek the Magician? 14 00:00:30,945 --> 00:00:34,130 Society's darling, the favorite of crowned heads, 15 00:00:34,330 --> 00:00:38,274 a triumph at every fraternal convention-ask any Odd Fellow! 16 00:00:38,474 --> 00:00:42,266 You... you has-been! You're fired! 17 00:00:42,466 --> 00:00:43,828 - No! - Get away from me! 18 00:00:44,028 --> 00:00:45,915 No! But I've worked for you for twelve years! 19 00:00:46,115 --> 00:00:49,627 Yes, and what did you draw? Flies! Horse flies at that! 20 00:00:49,827 --> 00:00:51,651 You've ruined me! You call yourself an entertainer? Back to the-what? 21 00:00:51,851 --> 00:00:54,309 Now wait a minute, wait a minute. Now hold it! 22 00:00:54,509 --> 00:00:56,051 - Never mind! He's, this guy- - Wait a minute, will ya please? 23 00:00:56,251 --> 00:00:59,035 There's no reason to fight like that, for crying out loud! [clears throat] 24 00:00:59,235 --> 00:01:01,939 Now, this man's worked for you for twelve years. 25 00:01:02,139 --> 00:01:05,330 I mean, all he's doing is just, uh, extending his hand to you. 26 00:01:05,530 --> 00:01:08,434 You can't throw him out! 27 00:01:08,634 --> 00:01:11,195 Who needs your pity? 28 00:01:13,775 --> 00:01:18,646 Here we come Walkin' down the street 29 00:01:18,846 --> 00:01:24,439 We get the funniest looks from Ev'ry one we meet 30 00:01:24,639 --> 00:01:29,874 Hey, hey, we're the Monkees And people say we monkey around 31 00:01:30,074 --> 00:01:35,894 But we're too busy singing To put anybody down 32 00:01:36,294 --> 00:01:41,627 We're just tryin' to be friendly Come and watch us sing and play 33 00:01:41,727 --> 00:01:47,517 We're the young generation And we've got something to say 34 00:01:47,717 --> 00:01:53,240 Hey, hey, we're the Monkees You never know where we'll be found 35 00:01:53,440 --> 00:01:55,814 So you better get ready, 36 00:01:56,014 --> 00:02:00,040 We may be comin' to your town 37 00:02:03,980 --> 00:02:07,682 The Monkees brought to you by Kellogg's 38 00:02:07,882 --> 00:02:11,858 K-E double L, O double good, 39 00:02:12,058 --> 00:02:14,841 Kellogg's best to you 40 00:02:26,029 --> 00:02:28,069 Ooh! Why, that's kind of a drag, innit? 41 00:02:28,269 --> 00:02:31,485 Yeah, what a bummer, man. 42 00:02:32,477 --> 00:02:34,668 Um, hi. 43 00:02:34,868 --> 00:02:36,579 Wh-what are you doing? Looking down at me? 44 00:02:36,779 --> 00:02:38,085 Laughing at an old man? 45 00:02:38,285 --> 00:02:38,921 - No- - No! 46 00:02:39,121 --> 00:02:40,118 -we came to say we're sorry. 47 00:02:40,318 --> 00:02:43,541 Don't be sorry. People don't want to see magicians anymore. 48 00:02:43,741 --> 00:02:47,029 They-they want to see reality as it's shown to them on television. 49 00:02:47,229 --> 00:02:48,862 Bleeech! What's that? 50 00:02:49,062 --> 00:02:50,814 That's a very special monkey's paw; 51 00:02:51,014 --> 00:02:53,316 it was given to me by a, an old lama in Tibet. 52 00:02:53,516 --> 00:02:54,893 Ooh! I think it's kinda groovy. 53 00:02:55,093 --> 00:02:57,013 Oh, I remember it a-as if it was yesterday. 54 00:02:57,213 --> 00:03:03,303 I was a young man, looking for the secrets of the unknown in far Tibet. 55 00:03:05,494 --> 00:03:09,877 I climbed to the heights of the highest mountain in Tibet to see the High Lama. 56 00:03:10,077 --> 00:03:12,374 The Lama was very surprised to see me. 57 00:03:12,574 --> 00:03:18,422 Aaahh! Ahhhaha! Ahh! Ah-Hey. Hey. 58 00:03:18,622 --> 00:03:19,822 What are you doing up here? 59 00:03:20,022 --> 00:03:22,253 You're some kind of complete nut, come all the way up here! 60 00:03:22,453 --> 00:03:27,445 It's cold and horrible and miserable up here! What are you doing? 61 00:03:27,645 --> 00:03:31,262 I have come, hand over hand, foot over foot, 62 00:03:31,462 --> 00:03:32,798 to reach the top of the mountain. 63 00:03:32,998 --> 00:03:37,540 For real? Ooh, man, tell me how you did it; I been trying to get down for twelve years. 64 00:03:37,740 --> 00:03:40,845 All this horrible weather- Cut off the snow! 65 00:03:41,045 --> 00:03:42,366 Suddenly, it stopped snowing. 66 00:03:42,566 --> 00:03:44,087 These people. 67 00:03:44,287 --> 00:03:48,581 I... came all this way to, to, to find the High Lama. Where is he? 68 00:03:48,781 --> 00:03:51,612 Oh, well, I'm afraid you're out of luck; he's out back, sleeping it off. 69 00:03:51,812 --> 00:03:52,841 You don't mean! 70 00:03:53,041 --> 00:03:55,109 Yeah, that's what I mean; that's how he got his name. 71 00:03:55,309 --> 00:03:58,470 However, I'm the Regular Lama, if I can help you, you just call me Regular. 72 00:03:58,670 --> 00:03:59,877 - Alright, Reg. - Sure. 73 00:04:00,077 --> 00:04:02,101 Here's my story. It's a long and sad one. 74 00:04:02,301 --> 00:04:03,328 - Wha? - Listen carefully. 75 00:04:03,528 --> 00:04:03,926 I- 76 00:04:04,126 --> 00:04:07,766 It started ten thousand miles ago in the Sahara desert overlooking a tree. 77 00:04:07,966 --> 00:04:11,365 The golden maiden was high above the ten thousand foot mountain. 78 00:04:11,565 --> 00:04:14,181 As the trees shone down over the valley, I walked for ten 79 00:04:14,381 --> 00:04:17,755 thousand miles through burning dands and seserts. Uh, sands and deserts. 80 00:04:17,955 --> 00:04:19,395 [snores] 81 00:04:19,595 --> 00:04:21,931 Reg? Reg? 82 00:04:22,131 --> 00:04:24,059 Hm? What? 83 00:04:24,259 --> 00:04:27,397 I was coming looking for the, uh, Tibetan unknown secrets. 84 00:04:27,597 --> 00:04:28,139 So? 85 00:04:28,339 --> 00:04:32,027 I was looking for the un-unknown secrets of Tibetan? 86 00:04:32,227 --> 00:04:32,779 What? 87 00:04:32,979 --> 00:04:35,692 I was looking for the Tibetan secret unknowns? 88 00:04:35,892 --> 00:04:36,307 Wha? 89 00:04:36,507 --> 00:04:37,443 Don't you have something for me? 90 00:04:37,643 --> 00:04:38,938 Yeah, I've got something for you. 91 00:04:39,138 --> 00:04:41,851 I've got a summons right here for trespassing; it's my property. 92 00:04:42,051 --> 00:04:43,811 Guh! 93 00:04:44,011 --> 00:04:46,779 But then, after much persuasion, the Regular Lama broke down, 94 00:04:46,979 --> 00:04:48,699 and he gave me the monkey's paw. 95 00:04:48,899 --> 00:04:50,787 Well, after much persuasion, I, the Regular Lama, 96 00:04:50,987 --> 00:04:52,492 will break down and give you this. 97 00:04:52,692 --> 00:04:54,788 It is a monkey's paw. It'll grant you three wishes. 98 00:04:54,988 --> 00:04:56,043 For me?! 99 00:04:56,243 --> 00:05:01,044 Yes, for you. You're the only fool I know deserves that kind of luck. 100 00:05:01,244 --> 00:05:02,851 Boy, I bet this thing is priceless. 101 00:05:03,051 --> 00:05:05,789 Oh, it is! It is! You can have it for a quarter. 102 00:05:05,989 --> 00:05:06,555 A quarter? 103 00:05:06,755 --> 00:05:08,249 It is priceless; we've got a quarter. 104 00:05:08,449 --> 00:05:12,801 Are you still here? I told you to clear out! I don't want any bums hanging around here! 105 00:05:13,001 --> 00:05:14,980 - He's not a bum! - No, I'm not a bum! 106 00:05:15,180 --> 00:05:16,118 Have you got a job? 107 00:05:16,318 --> 00:05:17,458 You just fired him! 108 00:05:17,658 --> 00:05:20,325 Alright, so he's a vagrant too. Now, come on, get it outta here. 109 00:05:20,525 --> 00:05:22,721 Ha ha ha ha. 110 00:05:22,921 --> 00:05:26,576 Come on. Vamoose! Scram! Blow! Beat it! 111 00:05:26,776 --> 00:05:29,569 Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. He's not a vagrant, ya know why? 112 00:05:29,769 --> 00:05:31,347 'Cause he's the proud possessor of a quarter. 113 00:05:31,547 --> 00:05:31,985 Oh, thank you. 114 00:05:32,185 --> 00:05:34,849 Alright, so he's not a vagrant, but he still has to go. 115 00:05:35,049 --> 00:05:37,180 - Why? - No peddlers allowed! 116 00:05:37,380 --> 00:05:38,401 Hm. You're all heart. 117 00:05:38,601 --> 00:05:42,986 Thank you. Come on! Out! Vamoose! Scram! Beat it! 118 00:05:43,186 --> 00:05:46,170 Well, that's show business. 119 00:05:47,441 --> 00:05:50,401 Well, how can we pay our dues unless we work? 120 00:05:50,601 --> 00:05:51,840 - That the union? - Yeah. 121 00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:52,826 What'd he say? 122 00:05:53,026 --> 00:05:54,776 He said we can't work until we pay our dues. 123 00:05:54,976 --> 00:05:56,739 And we can't pay our dues until we work. 124 00:05:56,939 --> 00:05:57,856 That's what I told him! 125 00:05:58,056 --> 00:05:58,730 Well, what did he say? 126 00:05:58,930 --> 00:06:00,130 Well, he said don't confuse me. 127 00:06:00,330 --> 00:06:02,426 You know it's true that while there is a great deal of moral purpose 128 00:06:02,626 --> 00:06:05,113 on the side of the unions, they do tend to want a stranglehold. 129 00:06:05,313 --> 00:06:07,625 Well, there's gotta be something we can do. 130 00:06:07,825 --> 00:06:12,776 Man, I wish there was some way that we could get that money. 131 00:06:12,976 --> 00:06:16,065 Well, boys, I just came from the union; 132 00:06:16,265 --> 00:06:18,673 they say you haven't paid your dues in a long time. 133 00:06:18,873 --> 00:06:20,545 We paid our dues the last job we had. 134 00:06:20,745 --> 00:06:21,658 Oh, when was that? 135 00:06:21,858 --> 00:06:23,946 It's been a long time. 136 00:06:24,146 --> 00:06:26,746 I will pay your dues and then take it out of your first week's salary. 137 00:06:26,946 --> 00:06:28,369 Thank you! Oh, thank you. 138 00:06:28,569 --> 00:06:31,153 Well, of course there'll have to be a little kickback on the loan. 139 00:06:31,353 --> 00:06:32,354 How much of a percentage? 140 00:06:32,554 --> 00:06:33,745 - Good point. - Good point. 141 00:06:33,945 --> 00:06:35,365 About a hundred and forty-two percent. 142 00:06:35,565 --> 00:06:38,717 Oh, if it's only a hundred and forty-two percent?! 143 00:06:38,917 --> 00:06:40,820 You're all heart. 144 00:06:41,020 --> 00:06:43,179 Father, I'm very sorry you lost the job. 145 00:06:43,379 --> 00:06:47,799 Well, don't feel bad, daughter. At least today, 146 00:06:47,999 --> 00:06:51,555 I-I-I made a quarter. Hee hee. Yeah. 147 00:06:51,755 --> 00:06:53,251 Father, where's the monkey's paw? 148 00:06:53,451 --> 00:06:55,747 There's another one gone-the monkey's paw. 149 00:06:55,947 --> 00:06:58,859 Oh, I-I sold it today to one of these long-haired weirdoes. 150 00:06:59,059 --> 00:07:01,500 You know, high-heeled boots, beads, bleh. 151 00:07:01,700 --> 00:07:03,907 Don't you remember The Book of Mystery said it was cursed? 152 00:07:04,107 --> 00:07:10,498 Heh, if it was cursed and I got rid of it, my luck'd change immediately. 153 00:07:12,307 --> 00:07:17,164 Yeah, hello? Yes, this is Mendrek... 154 00:07:18,291 --> 00:07:23,991 A contest? I win a million dollars?! 155 00:07:24,107 --> 00:07:27,819 Honest, guys, I'm sure, one hundred percent sure, 156 00:07:28,019 --> 00:07:31,547 that this is a magical monkey's paw. After all, it got us our union dues. 157 00:07:31,747 --> 00:07:34,483 Yeah, but at an interest of a hundred and forty-two percent. 158 00:07:34,683 --> 00:07:37,055 Well, a hundred and thirty-seven wouldn't have been too bad. 159 00:07:37,255 --> 00:07:38,986 Well, what does a monkey's paw know from interest rates? Heh heh. 160 00:07:39,186 --> 00:07:41,995 Well, uh, let's see what it can do for us now; I'm starving! 161 00:07:42,195 --> 00:07:44,611 Oh, monkey paw, oh, monkey paw, 162 00:07:44,811 --> 00:07:50,088 I wish for a spaghetti dinner big enough to feed all four of us! 163 00:07:52,602 --> 00:07:55,219 Well, I, uh, I didn't wish for how it should be served. 164 00:07:55,419 --> 00:07:56,531 Food! 165 00:07:56,731 --> 00:07:58,419 Ooh, look at that spaghetti! 166 00:07:58,619 --> 00:07:59,499 Sure, eat up, guys. 167 00:07:59,699 --> 00:08:00,172 Mmm. 168 00:08:00,372 --> 00:08:02,675 Beautiful. 169 00:08:02,875 --> 00:08:05,179 One more wish... 170 00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:12,632 Hey, Micky, will you come on, please? And put that thing down. Weeeh! 171 00:08:12,832 --> 00:08:15,937 Ey, Micky, you know you can't go on the stage with that thing; it's ugly. 172 00:08:16,137 --> 00:08:19,149 Yeah, I know, I know, Davy, I got one more wish coming though. 173 00:08:19,349 --> 00:08:21,223 Doe doe believer, sober saben... you know, man, 174 00:08:21,423 --> 00:08:25,447 you haven't talked about anything but that paw since you've had it, man, not a thing. 175 00:08:25,647 --> 00:08:29,678 Yeah, I know I'm really hung up on it, man, I wish I could stop talking abou- 176 00:08:29,878 --> 00:08:32,283 Now, here they are: The Monkees. 177 00:09:07,351 --> 00:09:09,974 Hey! What's going on? 178 00:09:10,174 --> 00:09:11,791 What, what do you mean, what's going on? Nothing's going on. 179 00:09:11,991 --> 00:09:13,775 Well, I know that, but what's he doing? 180 00:09:13,975 --> 00:09:16,191 Well, he's doing his thing here, that's pretty groovy, 181 00:09:16,391 --> 00:09:17,495 that's heavy stuff he's laying down there, you know. 182 00:09:17,695 --> 00:09:18,159 Yeah! 183 00:09:18,359 --> 00:09:20,079 Well, tell him to do his thing on his own time! 184 00:09:20,279 --> 00:09:22,703 On my time, he's supposed to be singing! 185 00:09:22,903 --> 00:09:24,607 Well, well, he is singing! 186 00:09:24,807 --> 00:09:26,688 Well, I don't hear anything! 187 00:09:26,888 --> 00:09:29,167 Oh, hear something? Is that what you meant-? 188 00:09:29,367 --> 00:09:31,335 Well, he's not singing with his voice; 189 00:09:31,535 --> 00:09:33,807 he's singing with his feet! Ha ha. His feet. 190 00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:34,855 Right! 191 00:09:35,055 --> 00:09:36,159 His feet! Right! His feet! Right! 192 00:09:36,359 --> 00:09:37,735 Yeah, man! Dig those toes! Feet, right! 193 00:09:37,935 --> 00:09:38,600 Yeah, foot action! 194 00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:40,583 Yeah, incredible, man, just outta sight! 195 00:09:40,783 --> 00:09:43,551 What are you, crazy? Nobody sings with their feet! 196 00:09:43,751 --> 00:09:45,599 What do you mean, nobody si-of course they sing with their feet. 197 00:09:45,799 --> 00:09:48,966 I mean, uh, didn't ya ever hear of the movie, uh, Young Man With a Corn? 198 00:09:49,166 --> 00:09:51,639 Yeah, and how about Flat Foot Floogie With a Floy Floy? 199 00:09:51,839 --> 00:09:55,792 Anybody can sing; it's not everybody can play their feet. No siree, bob. 200 00:09:55,992 --> 00:09:57,928 But I hired a singer! 201 00:09:58,128 --> 00:10:00,568 Go toe, go! Sock it to me, baby! 202 00:10:00,768 --> 00:10:01,432 Ooh. 203 00:10:01,632 --> 00:10:02,735 Heh! That's a pun! Heh heh! Heh heh! 204 00:10:02,935 --> 00:10:04,351 Now he's triple toeing! Look at that! 205 00:10:04,551 --> 00:10:05,112 Foot action! 206 00:10:05,312 --> 00:10:08,240 Incredible, just incredible! Very far out. 207 00:10:08,440 --> 00:10:10,615 Hey, if you think that's good, you oughta see him when 208 00:10:10,815 --> 00:10:13,359 he takes off his shoes. It is uptight, outta sight. 209 00:10:13,559 --> 00:10:14,632 Well, I'll tell ya something. 210 00:10:14,832 --> 00:10:18,800 If that young man isn't singing by tomorrow morning, you're finished. 211 00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:21,249 You're outta show business; you'll never work in show business again. 212 00:10:21,449 --> 00:10:23,859 We're in a lot of trouble. 213 00:10:30,215 --> 00:10:34,089 Oh, Micky, come on. You can talk; there's nothing wrong with your voice. 214 00:10:34,289 --> 00:10:36,641 Are you kidding? Have you ever heard him sing? Ah! 215 00:10:36,841 --> 00:10:41,493 Micky, that paw has no magical power whatsoever. You can talk, you know. 216 00:10:44,289 --> 00:10:45,210 Nuts. 217 00:10:45,410 --> 00:10:47,788 Come on, guys, let's talk this over. 218 00:10:49,044 --> 00:10:50,360 We're gonna have to get our heads together on this one. 219 00:10:50,560 --> 00:10:53,333 - Right. - Ow! Oh! 220 00:10:53,533 --> 00:10:56,606 Now look, we've got no voice, no job, and no rent. 221 00:10:56,806 --> 00:10:58,587 Yeah, and the good times can't last forever. 222 00:10:58,787 --> 00:11:00,978 Oh. 223 00:11:01,178 --> 00:11:03,778 You know, it all started when Mendrek gave us that monkey's paw. 224 00:11:03,978 --> 00:11:05,089 Right! 225 00:11:05,289 --> 00:11:07,707 Let's go talk to him and see what this is all about. 226 00:11:07,907 --> 00:11:08,474 Let's do that. 227 00:11:08,674 --> 00:11:10,275 Come on. 228 00:11:10,475 --> 00:11:16,243 Yes, yes, I can give you three minutes... but it will cost you three million dollars. 229 00:11:16,443 --> 00:11:16,921 Hello... 230 00:11:17,121 --> 00:11:18,282 Oh, the phones, answer the phones. 231 00:11:18,482 --> 00:11:19,001 Hello? 232 00:11:19,201 --> 00:11:22,386 Yes, the Taj Mahal would make a lovely movie palace. 233 00:11:22,586 --> 00:11:25,250 But I want the popcorn concession too, you understand. 234 00:11:25,450 --> 00:11:29,279 No, no, Mr. Carson, uh, Mendrek wants you on his show. 235 00:11:31,330 --> 00:11:33,426 No, man, he can't come... 236 00:11:33,626 --> 00:11:36,315 Well, I don't care who you are, he, uh, he can't come... 237 00:11:36,515 --> 00:11:38,591 Well, because he don't like barbecue, I guess... 238 00:11:38,791 --> 00:11:42,571 I don't know... hoo, what a pushy guy. 239 00:11:43,482 --> 00:11:46,594 Ah, yeah, just a minute. Now, do you wanna buy all of North America, 240 00:11:46,794 --> 00:11:49,099 a piece of Tasmania, or vice-versa? 241 00:11:49,299 --> 00:11:50,290 Yes. 242 00:11:50,490 --> 00:11:52,890 Vice-versa. Right, buh-bye. 243 00:11:53,090 --> 00:11:56,593 That's enough of my day. Now, what can I do for you? 244 00:11:56,793 --> 00:11:59,658 Well, uh, see what we came about was, uh, because of this monkey's paw that you sold- 245 00:11:59,858 --> 00:12:01,554 Why, uh, the phones! The phones! 246 00:12:01,754 --> 00:12:03,546 I'm a very busy man, you know. Answer the phones. 247 00:12:03,746 --> 00:12:05,090 Uh... 248 00:12:05,290 --> 00:12:07,154 Well, no, wait a minute! There's a curse- 249 00:12:07,354 --> 00:12:11,571 They ring all day long. I-no, I'm a very busy man, you know. 250 00:12:23,698 --> 00:12:26,402 Well, Mendrek was a great help. What are we gonna do now? 251 00:12:26,602 --> 00:12:29,978 Well, let's see, let's analyze the situation... 252 00:12:30,178 --> 00:12:31,308 Can't be that monkey's paw. 253 00:12:31,508 --> 00:12:32,058 No. 254 00:12:32,258 --> 00:12:36,290 What in the world could possibly be stopping Micky from talking? 255 00:12:36,490 --> 00:12:38,427 He's sick. 256 00:12:38,627 --> 00:12:39,702 Yeah, he's sick. 257 00:12:39,902 --> 00:12:40,722 That's right. 258 00:12:40,922 --> 00:12:44,850 Right, and if somebody's sick, what's the cure? 259 00:12:45,050 --> 00:12:46,985 Chicken soup! Heh heh! 260 00:12:47,185 --> 00:12:49,469 Chicken soup? 261 00:12:55,785 --> 00:12:58,858 You know he hasn't said a thing in twelve hours? 262 00:12:59,058 --> 00:13:02,322 That's it! In twelve hours, he forgot how to talk. 263 00:13:02,522 --> 00:13:04,355 I mean, anybody can forget how to talk in twelve hours. 264 00:13:04,555 --> 00:13:06,571 Well, then it's simple; all we do is teach him to talk! 265 00:13:06,771 --> 00:13:07,578 How? 266 00:13:07,778 --> 00:13:09,267 What did you say? 267 00:13:09,467 --> 00:13:12,135 How! 268 00:13:12,335 --> 00:13:13,622 Alright, now that we've got this all down, 269 00:13:13,822 --> 00:13:15,956 apple, kat, hare krishna, legalize, wisdom, frodis, 270 00:13:16,156 --> 00:13:18,092 and of course, save the Texas prairie chicken, 271 00:13:18,292 --> 00:13:20,357 we're going to our next lesson which is speech. 272 00:13:20,557 --> 00:13:23,758 Now Micky, I want you to repeat after me, what is that? 273 00:13:23,958 --> 00:13:29,636 It's a pencil. Right? Come on, Mick, say it. Pencil. Pencil. 274 00:13:29,836 --> 00:13:30,885 Come on, uh, look, um- 275 00:13:31,085 --> 00:13:33,321 - Say pencil. - Pen-pencil. Pencil. Pen- 276 00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:33,947 Puh. Puh. Show him the P. 277 00:13:34,147 --> 00:13:35,294 [popping Ps] 278 00:13:35,494 --> 00:13:38,306 Pencil. Pencil. Oh, it's no good. He won't be 279 00:13:38,506 --> 00:13:41,702 able to sing tonight. He can't even say "pencil"! 280 00:13:41,902 --> 00:13:44,565 Do you suppose it has anything to do with the fact that this is a crayon? 281 00:13:44,765 --> 00:13:45,925 Now "crayon" I can say. 282 00:13:46,125 --> 00:13:47,006 Come on, pencil. 283 00:13:47,206 --> 00:13:49,045 Pencil. Try pencil. 284 00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:51,133 He can't say anything but "crayon". 285 00:13:51,333 --> 00:13:53,453 You know what? I think it's a mental problem. 286 00:13:53,653 --> 00:13:55,477 You can say that again. Ha ha ha. 287 00:13:55,677 --> 00:13:57,253 No, and where do you go if you have a mental problem? 288 00:13:57,453 --> 00:14:00,366 Well, you go to, uh, you know, to the mental problem specialist. 289 00:14:00,566 --> 00:14:06,229 So, you are unable to talk. So? Speak up. What's the matter? 290 00:14:06,429 --> 00:14:09,169 Cat got your tongue? 291 00:14:09,369 --> 00:14:11,327 Well. We give you a little test. 292 00:14:11,527 --> 00:14:13,254 Here. A test. 293 00:14:13,454 --> 00:14:19,829 Now. What does that appear to seem to be to you? 294 00:14:20,029 --> 00:14:22,229 That looks exactly like a bunch of flowers to me. 295 00:14:22,429 --> 00:14:24,724 I am talking to him. 296 00:14:24,924 --> 00:14:25,918 I'm, I'm sorry. 297 00:14:26,118 --> 00:14:33,094 Heh. You're such a silly. This is obviously a bunny and chicken. Ya. Now. 298 00:14:33,294 --> 00:14:35,749 Looks like a tomato ketchup stain to me. 299 00:14:35,949 --> 00:14:41,446 Seems you two came together. That is a bunny and a chicken! Hm? Now! 300 00:14:41,646 --> 00:14:43,973 It looks like a buncha birds dancing to me, ya know. 301 00:14:44,173 --> 00:14:50,549 You three should form a group! It is a bunny and a chicken! 302 00:14:50,749 --> 00:14:53,110 Well, wait a minute, there's no need to get hostile about it. 303 00:14:53,310 --> 00:14:58,701 Don't you give me that hostile stuff-I hate you! It's a bunny and a chicken! 304 00:14:58,901 --> 00:15:01,501 - I'm sorry, man... - Looks like a buncha girls dancing! 305 00:15:01,701 --> 00:15:03,183 - A bunny and a chicken! - Like a bunch of flowers. 306 00:15:03,383 --> 00:15:04,869 - A bunny and a chicken! - Like a tomato ketchup stain. 307 00:15:05,069 --> 00:15:07,141 - A bunny and a chicken! - A buncha birds dancing. 308 00:15:07,341 --> 00:15:13,518 A bunny and a chicken! Get up! Get! Up! That! Is! a bunny and a chicken. 309 00:15:13,718 --> 00:15:15,710 Whoa, hold, hold it, oops. Ey! 310 00:15:15,910 --> 00:15:19,158 It is obviously a bunny! And a chicken! 311 00:15:19,358 --> 00:15:20,854 Did he learn how to sing yet? 312 00:15:21,054 --> 00:15:23,166 Well, he didn't actually learn how to sing yet, but, uh, 313 00:15:23,366 --> 00:15:27,541 we incorporated his silence into the act. It's bound to be a hit. 314 00:15:29,870 --> 00:15:32,514 Well, here we are, drumming up a little business. Ha ha. 315 00:15:32,519 --> 00:15:34,084 A-ha. Say the magic word, you get a hundred dollars. 316 00:15:34,404 --> 00:15:35,741 You don't say the magic word, you get two hundred dollars. 317 00:15:36,036 --> 00:15:37,902 You give me three hundred dollars, I tell you what the magic word is. 318 00:15:38,102 --> 00:15:39,602 Good business. That's good business. 319 00:15:39,802 --> 00:15:42,539 Stop this! What do you think you're doing? 320 00:15:42,739 --> 00:15:47,852 I hired you to sing, not grow hair and smoke cigars and honk the horn! 321 00:15:48,052 --> 00:15:52,123 You're fired! You'll never work in show business again, now get out! 322 00:15:52,323 --> 00:15:54,299 Did you like it, did you like it? 323 00:15:54,499 --> 00:15:56,497 [sighs] 324 00:15:59,859 --> 00:16:02,219 The nerve of that guy throwing us outta that place. How do you like that? 325 00:16:02,419 --> 00:16:03,259 I don't like it a bit. 326 00:16:03,459 --> 00:16:04,467 You know, I don't blame him myself. 327 00:16:04,667 --> 00:16:07,876 Now who wants an act with a fuzzy headed mute harpist, 328 00:16:08,076 --> 00:16:10,443 an Italian with a weird looking felt hat, 329 00:16:10,643 --> 00:16:13,490 and another guy with a long nose, a mustache, and a smelly cigar. 330 00:16:13,690 --> 00:16:16,132 You know, it's not commercial. I wouldn't buy the act. I wouldn't buy it. 331 00:16:16,332 --> 00:16:18,899 You're right, there's no audience identification. 332 00:16:19,099 --> 00:16:20,186 Man, the way our luck's been running out, 333 00:16:20,386 --> 00:16:23,284 I think we better go see Mendrek and get this thing straightened out. 334 00:16:23,484 --> 00:16:25,700 Gee, it's so quiet and everything around here. Where are the phones? 335 00:16:25,900 --> 00:16:29,731 Oh, I've given up all that, uh, now that I've made my fortune. 336 00:16:29,931 --> 00:16:33,900 I'm devoting my time now to helping such poor unfortunates as yourself. 337 00:16:34,100 --> 00:16:34,947 Oh, how refreshing. 338 00:16:35,147 --> 00:16:37,251 Now, wh-what may I do for you? 339 00:16:37,451 --> 00:16:39,252 Well, uh, you see, it's this monkey's paw. 340 00:16:39,452 --> 00:16:41,682 Ever since we've had it, man, it's been nothing but bad luck. 341 00:16:41,882 --> 00:16:42,571 [mouths "Yeah, it's been a bummer."] 342 00:16:42,771 --> 00:16:43,915 He said "Yeah, it's been a bummer". 343 00:16:44,115 --> 00:16:46,355 And, uh, one day, Micky wished that he wouldn't talk, 344 00:16:46,555 --> 00:16:48,658 and all of a sudden, he just stopped, which is a stone drag. 345 00:16:48,858 --> 00:16:49,883 Quit outright. 346 00:16:50,083 --> 00:16:52,177 You poor unfortunate boy. 347 00:16:53,921 --> 00:16:57,235 Perhaps in my climb for success, I have been harsh on you. 348 00:16:57,435 --> 00:16:59,915 Father, maybe The Book of Mystery will tell us how to break the spell. 349 00:17:00,115 --> 00:17:03,627 Oh, excellent idea. Y-y-you go with her to The Book of Mystery, 350 00:17:03,827 --> 00:17:07,994 and I'll, I'll take this pocket book edition and work on the boy here. 351 00:17:08,194 --> 00:17:12,241 Perhaps he, perhaps in that way, we'll be able to break the spell. 352 00:17:12,441 --> 00:17:13,241 - Let's hope so. - Let's hope so. 353 00:17:13,441 --> 00:17:14,321 - Let's hope so. - We certain should hope so. 354 00:17:14,521 --> 00:17:14,913 Let's hope so. 355 00:17:15,113 --> 00:17:16,234 Come with me to the library. 356 00:17:16,434 --> 00:17:17,930 Ah heh heh. 357 00:17:18,130 --> 00:17:20,913 You've really become very fond of that thing, haven't you? 358 00:17:21,113 --> 00:17:23,570 [pants] 359 00:17:23,770 --> 00:17:24,809 Ah, The Book of Mysteries. 360 00:17:25,009 --> 00:17:27,058 Oh, it's a big book, innit? 361 00:17:27,258 --> 00:17:31,530 Misers, mommies, monsters, mummies... 362 00:17:31,730 --> 00:17:37,499 Miraculous... marvelous... magnificent... 363 00:17:37,699 --> 00:17:40,947 back to the book, heh heh. Um, mummies, you say? 364 00:17:41,147 --> 00:17:45,410 It's a very old method for making a subject talk. 365 00:17:45,610 --> 00:17:46,994 I don't think we're on the right track. 366 00:17:47,194 --> 00:17:50,833 I don't see why not, it-it-it works in police stations all over the world. 367 00:17:51,033 --> 00:17:53,201 Monkee's paw... Monkee's paw... Monkee's paw... 368 00:17:53,401 --> 00:17:55,729 Monkee's... you know, I can't find it anywhere! 369 00:17:55,929 --> 00:17:58,080 I think you spell "monkey" with a Y. 370 00:17:58,280 --> 00:18:00,986 Oh, really? I always thought you spelled it with two Es. 371 00:18:01,186 --> 00:18:05,138 It says here, by the third gong, you'll hear- 372 00:18:10,305 --> 00:18:12,809 Ah! Stop it! Stop it! I can't stand it! 373 00:18:13,009 --> 00:18:15,937 See, I told ya! It works! 374 00:18:16,137 --> 00:18:19,193 I found it! I found the cure! I found it! 375 00:18:19,393 --> 00:18:23,458 Now, all we've got to do is find someone to buy the paw back from Micky, 376 00:18:23,658 --> 00:18:24,737 and the spell'll be broken. 377 00:18:24,937 --> 00:18:27,441 Well, we've gotta sell it to somebody who deserves it. 378 00:18:27,641 --> 00:18:30,455 Huh, that means somebody really nasty. 379 00:18:30,655 --> 00:18:33,914 Offhand, I can't think of anybody like that. 380 00:18:34,114 --> 00:18:35,290 A-ha! 381 00:18:35,490 --> 00:18:36,905 I just thought of somebody like that. 382 00:18:37,105 --> 00:18:40,986 Mendrek! Why don't you call the cops and get rid of these bums? 383 00:18:41,186 --> 00:18:43,249 Ah, would you like a good buy on a monkey's paw? 384 00:18:43,449 --> 00:18:45,714 You can come back to work for me tomorrow. 385 00:18:45,914 --> 00:18:47,713 Oh, I don't work anymore; I-I'm too rich. 386 00:18:47,913 --> 00:18:52,169 Ah ha ha, very funny. It seems like only yesterday you were a bum. 387 00:18:52,369 --> 00:18:53,849 - Oh, it was yesterday. - A vagrant. 388 00:18:54,049 --> 00:18:58,641 Oh, we-why don't you buy the paw? It only costs a quarter. 389 00:18:58,841 --> 00:19:00,914 A quarter for that piece of junk? 390 00:19:01,114 --> 00:19:03,023 Well, it has very special powers. 391 00:19:03,223 --> 00:19:05,826 I can't think of anyone who deserves it more. 392 00:19:06,026 --> 00:19:10,897 Well, thanks! What kind of powers? It better be good for a quarter. 393 00:19:11,097 --> 00:19:14,804 Well, with that, you can do all my tricks. Watch. 394 00:19:21,895 --> 00:19:25,256 Girl, don't you know everytime I see you smilin'? 395 00:19:25,456 --> 00:19:28,712 Hurts so bad cause when I see you, I start trying 396 00:19:28,912 --> 00:19:32,248 Try everything to stop but there's no denying 397 00:19:32,448 --> 00:19:36,731 Falling in love with you girl is just like dying 398 00:19:38,930 --> 00:19:44,138 Ohh, don't walk away 399 00:19:46,265 --> 00:19:52,069 Ohh, how can I make you stay, don't turn away 400 00:19:52,269 --> 00:19:54,473 I can still hear you saying those 401 00:19:54,673 --> 00:20:00,333 Words that never were true Spoken to help nobody but you 402 00:20:01,605 --> 00:20:03,290 Words with lies inside 403 00:20:03,490 --> 00:20:07,627 But small enough to hide till your playin' was through 404 00:20:10,819 --> 00:20:13,604 Girl don't you know we can work it out with talkin'? 405 00:20:13,804 --> 00:20:17,636 You won't turn around or slow down your walking 406 00:20:17,836 --> 00:20:21,139 I've given you everything with kiss to seal it 407 00:20:21,339 --> 00:20:25,646 You had to get your kicks with tryin' to steal it 408 00:20:28,140 --> 00:20:33,377 Now I'm standing here 409 00:20:35,184 --> 00:20:41,769 Strange, strange voices in my ears, I feel the tears 410 00:20:41,969 --> 00:20:43,376 But all I can hear are those 411 00:20:43,576 --> 00:20:49,282 Words that never were true Spoken to help nobody but you 412 00:20:50,721 --> 00:20:52,730 Words with lies inside 413 00:20:52,930 --> 00:20:56,764 But small enough to hide till your playin' was through 414 00:21:13,896 --> 00:21:17,327 Oh, I'm standing here 415 00:21:18,703 --> 00:21:25,312 Strange, strange voices in my ears, I feel the tears 416 00:21:25,512 --> 00:21:27,553 But all I can hear are those 417 00:21:27,753 --> 00:21:33,336 Words that never were true Spoken to help nobody but you 418 00:21:34,484 --> 00:21:36,871 Words with lies inside 419 00:21:37,071 --> 00:21:41,138 But small enough to hide till your playin' was through 420 00:21:41,315 --> 00:21:46,979 Words that never were true Spoken to help nobody but you 421 00:21:48,228 --> 00:21:50,234 Words with lies inside 422 00:21:50,716 --> 00:21:52,699 But small enough to hide till your playin... 423 00:21:52,899 --> 00:21:56,268 That's incredible! I want it! Give it to me! 424 00:21:58,956 --> 00:22:01,684 Now, who needs you, you bum? 425 00:22:01,884 --> 00:22:05,436 I'll become rich and famous! I'll get everything that's coming to me. 426 00:22:05,636 --> 00:22:07,211 Why don't you, uh, go ahead and try it? 427 00:22:07,411 --> 00:22:08,748 Okay, how does it work? 428 00:22:08,948 --> 00:22:10,379 Well, you make a wish on it. 429 00:22:10,579 --> 00:22:15,848 Alright, I wish for a million dollars! 430 00:22:17,319 --> 00:22:20,532 Ha ha! Oh, ahahahaha, it works! Ahahaha! 431 00:22:20,732 --> 00:22:22,507 Are you the manager that just wished for a million dollars? 432 00:22:22,707 --> 00:22:24,060 Yeah, what do you want, ya bum? 433 00:22:24,260 --> 00:22:25,363 I'm from Internal Revenue. 434 00:22:25,563 --> 00:22:29,171 You're under arrest for not paying taxes on this money. Come on, let's go. 435 00:22:29,371 --> 00:22:32,435 Well, now, wait a minute, couldn't we come to- 436 00:22:33,075 --> 00:22:35,051 Oh, guys, it's so great to be able to talk, you just can't understand. 437 00:22:35,251 --> 00:22:36,619 Remember when you were showing me the pencil? 438 00:22:36,819 --> 00:22:38,139 It was not a pencil, it was a crayon, I mean, it was a crayon- 439 00:22:38,339 --> 00:22:40,918 That's right. That's right. Marvelous, beautiful. 440 00:22:42,135 --> 00:22:43,311 I don't have to use my feet anymore, I can talk, 441 00:22:43,511 --> 00:22:44,991 I just talk about anything I want, talk about anything I want, 442 00:22:45,191 --> 00:22:47,480 - it's the first time [gibberish]... - Micky! 443 00:22:49,542 --> 00:22:51,468 Well, that wraps up another hilarious 444 00:22:51,668 --> 00:22:53,948 thirty minute episode, so this is Michael Nesmith. 445 00:22:54,148 --> 00:22:54,925 And Peter Tork. 446 00:22:55,125 --> 00:22:56,085 And David Jones. 447 00:22:56,285 --> 00:22:57,156 And Micky Dolenz. 448 00:22:57,356 --> 00:22:58,052 Saying... 449 00:22:58,252 --> 00:22:59,412 Bl-l-lum. 450 00:22:59,612 --> 00:23:04,253 Here we go, walking down the street, 451 00:23:04,453 --> 00:23:09,372 we have the funniest looks from, everyone we meet... 452 00:23:09,572 --> 00:23:12,221 DABA-DABA-DABA-DABA-DABA-DABA-DABA! 453 00:23:12,421 --> 00:23:13,668 Thirty-nine. 454 00:23:13,868 --> 00:23:15,915 We got take. Everybody's in position. 455 00:23:16,115 --> 00:23:18,877 Boys, in position. Boys, you can be in position already. 456 00:23:19,570 --> 00:23:20,624 Already in position. 457 00:23:20,824 --> 00:23:23,324 Right, you're in position. There. 458 00:23:23,527 --> 00:23:24,447 And... 459 00:23:24,647 --> 00:23:27,374 - Hello... - Hello... 460 00:23:27,574 --> 00:23:29,960 - Oh, we're the Monkees. - [cuckoo] I hate these kids. 461 00:23:30,252 --> 00:23:31,692 The hippie movement is dead. It was buried 462 00:23:31,892 --> 00:23:33,500 in San Francisco and has been replaced by free men. 463 00:23:33,700 --> 00:23:36,228 Now, that's Peter's movement. He's got six people, so far. 464 00:23:36,428 --> 00:23:37,436 Yeah, we're gonna form a country- 465 00:23:37,636 --> 00:23:38,428 We all have our own little movements. 466 00:23:38,628 --> 00:23:40,453 - called Belgravia. - Yeah. I have a movement. 467 00:23:40,653 --> 00:23:41,941 What about all these people who are still walking around with 468 00:23:42,541 --> 00:23:44,724 beads and long hair and flowers, hey're not hippies anymore? 469 00:23:44,924 --> 00:23:45,980 No. They're free people. 470 00:23:46,180 --> 00:23:48,756 I have beads. I'm not a hippie. Charlie bought me these. 471 00:23:48,956 --> 00:23:50,537 - What's the difference between- - You are too a hippie. 472 00:23:50,737 --> 00:23:51,962 I don't have beads, and I'm not a hippie, see? 473 00:23:52,162 --> 00:23:54,876 You are too. You wear those beads, you're a hippie. 474 00:23:55,437 --> 00:23:56,665 You got long hair, you're a hippie. 475 00:23:56,865 --> 00:23:58,439 Oh yeah. Don't hit me with a stick, please. 476 00:23:58,639 --> 00:24:00,659 It was done because, um, of the bad publicity 477 00:24:00,859 --> 00:24:02,604 the hippie movement has been getting. 478 00:24:02,804 --> 00:24:05,276 Now it's clear that, uh, every time that, uh, you know, uh, 479 00:24:05,476 --> 00:24:08,661 the hippies come up with something really vital and intelligent and interesting, 480 00:24:08,861 --> 00:24:12,452 uh, the establishment will take it over and put down the people who originated it, 481 00:24:12,652 --> 00:24:14,972 and, uh, you know, all these psychedelic things that you see... 482 00:24:15,172 --> 00:24:16,548 the very psychedelic things... 483 00:24:16,748 --> 00:24:17,772 They say, they say, "Turn on with... this". 484 00:24:17,972 --> 00:24:19,012 To [cuckoo]. Turn on? 485 00:24:19,212 --> 00:24:20,963 Now, what is this "turn on"? They're taking over, you know- 486 00:24:21,163 --> 00:24:22,509 - Yeah, that's right. - What are they... 487 00:24:22,709 --> 00:24:24,500 The hippie, hippie things. The hippies are being hip. 488 00:24:24,700 --> 00:24:26,517 The hippies are gonna invent new words and... 489 00:24:30,999 --> 00:24:36,806 In this generation In this lovin' time 490 00:24:37,006 --> 00:24:42,354 In this generation We will make the world shine 491 00:24:43,952 --> 00:24:50,088 We were born to love one another This is somethin', we all need 492 00:24:50,983 --> 00:24:56,504 We were born to love one another We must be what we're goin' to be 493 00:24:58,034 --> 00:25:01,113 And what we have to be, is free 494 00:25:02,134 --> 00:25:05,053 Love is understandin' We gotta be free 495 00:25:05,453 --> 00:25:08,651 Love is understandin' We gotta be free 496 00:25:10,627 --> 00:25:13,931 We gotta be free 497 00:25:14,128 --> 00:25:16,360 We gotta be free 41216

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