Original subtitles

Previously ondrawn together...

Prepare yourself...

For the rapture is almost upon us.

I'm sick of that bible-Thumpin' bitch.

Let's go to the mall!

Spanky: i hope you know what the hell you're doin'.

I am going in.

Spanky: that's a compact spot!

Foxxy: oh, lordy, we trapped!

We trapped! [Screaming]

Aah! Satan!

The antichrist! Super-Duper!

I will do anything you ask of me. Anything!

You're all gonna die!

Yaah!

I am goin' for help.

I'm the troop leader?

Must run away. Must--Uh, run-Run--

Run, xandir, run!

Where do you got yourdrawn together merchandise?

In the back. Unh!

[Wind whistling]

We're all going to die in this van.

Thanks to wooldoor,

We got no water, no fire,

No ventriloquistic entertainment. Nothing!

You should've just let me burn,

Like you did all those kids in the orphanage.

Hot-Cha-Cha-Cha-Cha!

Uh, we could drink the water

From ling-Ling's saltwater fish tank.

Are you crazy?

Everyone knows that drinking salt water

Dehydrates you and makes you hallucinate.

Oh, poo-Poo.

That's just an urban legend.

I'll show you "urban legend".

No...no!

The treasure's gone!

I have nothing left to live for.

Aaahh!

Hey! Whaddya know?

Wooldoor was right.

I feel well-Hydrated

And perfectly lucid.

[Echoing and slowing down] lucid...lucid...

Lucid...

Narrator: the saltwater toot drank

Is causing her to become further dehydrated.

Her enlarged heart is forced to pump harder and faster

Than that time she went up those stairs.

The chunky clots of blood struggle

To struggle through her veins and/or arteries.

Meanwhile, her fat kidneys are shutting down

And filling her body with toxins,

Causing toot to hallucinate.

Yep, everything is perfect,

Except for that man-Eating polar bear

With scorpion tail!

[Birds chirping]

[Screaming]

[Dog barks]

I will do anything evil you wish, master.

You know, i do kinda have

One secret fantasy.

[Giggles]

Yee-Haw!

♪♪ drivin' in the carpool lane yeah! ♪♪

This is so wrong.

Because technically, we're not really carpooling.

Just like that guy technically shouldn't be

In the funny vanity plate lane.

I'm glad i could make your delivery route more efficient,

My goat-Legged prince of lies.

And so, like a roadie for cher,

I traveled the earth at satan's side.

Say, check out that nice-Looking ox.

I don't know if i can.

The ninth commandment says,

"Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's ox."

Jeez, i was just saying to look at it.

Oh.

As you wish.

Oh, my. That is a sweet ox.

I haven't seen a bovine with such kind eyes

Since mother teresa died.

Oh, yes. I'm doing it.

I'm coveting the fuck out of that ox,

And i like it.

And it was at that moment i realized...

I love evil! Whoo! Ha ha! Ha ha ha!

Ha ha ha! Whoo! [Plays guitar]

Whoo hoo! Ha ha! Yeah!

Finally,

We got something to talk about.

[Whipping, screams echoing]

[Muffled grunting]

So, how are we doin', foxxy love?

[Muffled scream]

Can't complain.

Yow! Yaaah!

Barney!

Yaah! Yow!

What the hell is goin' on around here?

You see, many of you annoying cartoon characters

Show up at hot topic looking for merchandise

From your insipid shows.

[Giggles]

[Screams]

I came to the only logical conclusion.

If i could kidnap cartoon characters everybody hates,

People would pay handsomely

For the chance to torture them.

This is men's fault.

And wouldn't you know it?

I was right.

The more reviled the character, the more people will pay.

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Owooo!

And, given the hatred

That all high school graduates bear

Towardsdrawn together,

I'm sure you, foxxy love,

Will be my biggest payday yet.

No! Please don't!

I wanna speak to yo' manager.

Iamthe manager.

[Cell door slams]

[Wind whistling]

S-So cold.

But snowflakes... so beautiful,

S-So unique,

Like a child's laugh.

Unh!

Man: hey, that guy looks dead.

Let's take his shoes.

[Snorts] huh? Oh, god.

Are you guys gonna take advantage of me?

If you are, please ignore the tattoo on my ass.

"Living positive" just seemed like a cool motto

Back in 1983.

Wow. Look at this, nathan.

R. He's a troop leade

Oh, no. Not anymore.

I...walked away from all that.

You ran away from your responsibilities, too?

Both: so did we.

We left our jobs and our families

To live behind the dumpster at the mall.

Really? Why would you wanna do that?

Well, i'll tell you, kid.

™ª ♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪

♪♪ it's a doozy of a word ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ have some booze and lay a turd ♪♪

♪♪ in public view ♪♪ why the hell not?

♪♪ no need to give a flying fuck ♪♪

♪♪ about what anyone else might say ♪♪

♪♪ my toilet is a tire, teens set me on fire ♪♪

♪♪ and you're off the grid, and the tin foil hat ♪♪

♪♪ blocks the government from accessing the chip in your brain ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ every dumpster is a smorgasbord ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ the mean streets are your room and board ♪♪

♪♪ the world's your oyster, that we know ♪♪

♪♪ when you take up the life of a derelict hobo ♪♪

♪♪ livin' on the easy streets ♪♪

♪♪ where the freemasons can't detect you ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

♪♪ scum-A bum-A grub-A moochie ♪♪

Shh!

The man-Eating polar bear

With scorpion tail

Has hearing based on sound.

We're all gonna die!

[Speaking japanese]

Someone shut that fucking chicken up,

Or we're all gonna die!

I said shut that chicken up!

If the fat chick hallucinating from the salt water

Says it's true, then it must be true!

Whew, it's gone.

That was a close one.

[All sighing] close.

[Slowed down] close one.

[Farts]

I'm alive! I'm ali--

[Crunch] oh, my god!

That wasn't a chicken. It was ling-Ling.

Nooo--

Hang on.

Then who did i give my dry-Cleaning to?

[Clucking]

Noooo!

Clara: being evil was the most wonderful feeling in the world.

[Laughing maniacally]

Oh, god! Not the handicapped sanctuary!

So nice.

Delivery guy: be careful.

Caw! I'm deaf.

Caw! I'm deaf.

Caw! I'm deaf!

[Thump] aah!

Aah! You just killed that one-Legged man!

Le well, he sure wasn't handi-Capab

Of dodging the satan-Mobile!

[Thump]

Stop this truck right now!

[Tires skidding]

What's wrong, dark master?

The company has a strict policy

Against murder.

Unlike dhl. Their whole pay scale

Is based on confirmed kills.

You can't just murder people!

Lucifer, you have grown soft.

You are not fit to be lord

Of the hoary netherworld.

The apprentice has overtaken the master.

Mmm--

Unh! Aah!

Later!

Oh, no! Not thalidomide lake!

[Bones crunching] [screaming]

I crave pure evil.

And some chocolate.

I think i'm getting my period.

Opp! Yep, there she is.

We can sit here and argue for hours

About who suffocated ling-Ling.

But the truth is,

He's dead, and we are hungry.

Captain hero,

What are you saying?

G. I'm saying what we're all thinkin

It's time to cuddle with the charred corpse

Of that dummy.

I'll make you feel like a real boy.

[Imitating hannibal lecter sucking teeth]

I thought he was gonna say

We should eat ling-Ling.

What? We can't eat ling-Ling.

Or can we?

Yeah! Sure! Why not?

What's a mutual fund?

Fine. If we must, we must.

But before we eat ling-Ling,

Let us take a moment to remember the good times.

I'll always remember our trip to paree.

Guys, this trip has really brought us together.

[Speaking japanese]

And remember when we all got fucking wasted on the roof?

Oh, look. A shooting star.

[Speaking japanese]

Oh, and remember that time ling-Ling learned to speak english?

What's wrong with you people?!

?! Why don't you listen to me

Ling-Ling religion very a-Specific!

If body eaten, soul will burn in purgatory forever!

Forever!

Well, guys, let's dig in.

It's what ling-Ling would have wanted.

[Splashing] this is the life.

Ahh. Not a care in the world.

Yup. No house, no job,

No doctors.

[Ripping]

I don't care. Hey, lady.

Spare change?

Whoa. You guys are in worse shape

Than those freaks in that van.

Oh. You saw the people in that van, huh?

Oh, yeah. They're a mess--

Eating each other, screaming and yelling.

They thought i was some kind of polar bear scorpion monster.

[Splashing] really? That's terrible.

Xandir? [Drip]

Listen to me,

A strange reflection of a lion

In a puddle of piss.

You must return to the van to save your housemates.

Me? Who am i?

You am be the troop leader.

[Tribal yell]

Now pour yourself a hot cup

Of "stop being such a homo"

And get back into that van.

Oh. He's right.

Ernie? Nathan?

You've been really great to me,

But i need to go back to the van,

For i am the troop leader.

[Tribal yell]

Wow. He's taki n' responsibility for his life.

Maybe we should do the same.

Ma'am?

Could we bother you for some bus fare?

Oh, certainly.

I think i have some extra.

[Roaring]

[Choir vocalizing]

Aaah!

™ª ♪♪ someone's h ere to torture you ♪

How could you do this?

Do you think hot topic could support itself

By sellinghello kitty coin purses

Andinvader zim steering wheel covers?

What kind of business model is that?

Ugh... she's all yours.

Unh! Ugh!

[Screaming]

Foxxy?

Clara? [Gasps] i saved!

I am not here to save you.

I was left behind when you were all raptured to heaven.

I sold my soul to the devil

And devoted myself to committing sins.

Oooww!

Uh, clara...

If we was raptured up to heaven,

Why would i still be here?

Hmm. I don't know, foxxy.

Maybe this'll refresh your memory.

Oooww!

Uh, clara...

I rully wish you wouldn't do that anymore.

Look, nobody was raptured.

We just all went to the mall.

But you were all gone.

I just assumed the rapture came.

I could see that.

I'm so sorry, foxxy.

Hey, is everything ok in--

Unh! Ow.

Let's get outta here!

Wait! Come back!

Oh, no.

Old man topic is not gonna like this.

[Organ plays note]

[Happy whistling]

Hey, anyone want to trade ling-Ling in lobster sauce

For mu shu ling-Ling?

No, thanks. I'm stuffed.

[Farts]

Me, too. That was so much better

Than the ling-Ling pizza i had yesterday.

Oh, i could not eat another bite.

[All groan happily]

Damn you, chinese food.

I'm so hungry again.

[Howl]

The temperature's dropping fast.

We'll surely freeze to death before sunrise!

Aah!

There must be some way to stay warm.

[Groaning]

There is!

[Humming]

And i thought i smelled bad on the outside.

We'll be warm in here.

Hero, like i told you

At that sorority mixer...

There are already 2 of us

Inside this fat chick,

And there's no roo m for you!

All right, fine.

I'll just use my heat vision

To blow up the gas tank.

That'll keep me warm.

[Metal hissing]

No, captain hero, stop!

We can't all keep dying and then coming back to life

The next episode. It's totally illogical!

[Speaking japanese]

[Tribal yell]

My fellow mall-Mates.

Your troop leader hath returned!

Oh, my god!

Xandir...

You're the one who got us into this mess!

Hey, guys, this is all his fault!

I say we tear his flesh from his bones

And use it for kindling!

Charge!

[All yelling]

Let's hide in here.

The window! Quick!

[Man screaming]

We can't leave, clara.

We got to save them people

Who's bein' horribly tortured.

Man: you mean the viewers?

No.

Them lame cartoons.

Clara, thinking: hmm. Saving those cartoon characters

Could be my chance to get back in god's good graces

And get into heaven.

Foxxy will probably get in

Because of all those ridiculous affirmative-Action laws.

But because i'm white, i'll have to work for it.

You're right, foxxy.

Now let's go do that thing you said

That i can't remember because i was thinking about my hair.

Kill him! Die, you son of a bitch!

Ooh, i love your boots.

Seriously, what's a mutual fund?

Wait, stop! Hold up!

Listen, i know when i gave up

I let you all down.

Including myself.

But who here never gave up on something?

Um, toot, you clearly gave up caring

About your physical appearance.

Eh, i guess you're right.

[Squishing]

And, wooldoor,

You gave up your mentally challenged baby

For adoption.

I sure did.

[Rimshot]

And, spanky, you gave up on imagination

And made the nothing come.

They look like big, strong hands, don't they?

And, hero, you gave up $10,000

For a donkey onlet's make a deal.

That donkey paid for itself

In the first 6 months.

But i'm back, and i'm not givin' up on us.

I'm leading us out of this van

Like moses led the jews out of the desert

To the world's everlasting regret.

We'll never get out of here!

It's hopeless.

That's where you're wrong, wooldoor.

There is hope!

As long as we're together,

Drawn-- You say, "drawn together,"

And i swear to christ

I'm gonna cave your skull in

With a tire iron

And eat what drips out.

All right, fair enough.

But i have a plan to get us out of here.

I know it's against gay policy,

But spit it out!

Just look around!

We can use the scrap from the van

To make some kind of vehicle.

! Yeah! I think he's right

Yeah, that'll work! That can work!

Did anyone like thatgreek weddingmovie?

I'm trying to figure out i f i should rent it or not.

[Whipping, cries echoing]

[Over p.A.] Attention, torturers.

We have a security breach.

We must evacuate hot topic immediately

Before the authorities arrive.

Not going back to jail.

[Foxxy screams]

What part of "we need to evacuate"

Do you not understand?

Not today, mister!

Huu-Aahh!

Aaah!

Nice work, clara.

Now let's get his--

Ok. I think you got him.

I...

Must...

Get...

Into...

Heaven!

Is you done?

Not sure.

How do you know when you're done killing something?

When yo' man pick you up at the clinic

And take you drinkin' at the club.

Now let's save some lives.

Holy crap. We've gotta hurry.

Don't worry, innocent victims.

We are here in the name of the lord to save you.

Thank you! Thank you so much.

Oh, i'm not doing this for thanks.

I'm doing this to make up for the sins i've committed

So i can get into heaven.

Well, that's nice. But technically,

To get into heaven,

You just have to ask jesus to forgive you.

Really? Jesus forgives everybody who asks.

Oh. Well, that sounds a lot easier

Than sorting through all these keys.

Foxxy: ooh. There it go.

Let's get outta here, foxxy.

Oh, i am so sorry.

Later!

Aw, shucks.

I'm gonna die.

And i've never kno wn what it's like to love.

What about all the stuff we did

When we went camping, davey?

That wasn't about love , goliath.

It was about power.

Xandir: and so we put operation "my idea" into effect.

[Music similar to the a-Teamplaying]

[Buzzing]

Good work, guys!

We're almost home.

[Rumbling]

Ow! What the hell?

Aah! It's the van!

We've compromised its structural integrity.

It's going to collapse!

We have to launch now!

Y! But she's not read

If we launch now, she could break apart!

We could die!

If we stay here, we're already dead!

So like the time fernando and i went to a diner

And ordered a bowl of soup to split,

But we didn't feel like crackers,

We got a roll!

[Wheel squeaking]

You did it, troop leader...

Who's a homo.

No, we did it!

[All cheering]

Let's get the van and go to the mall!

Hey, look!

Hey, guys, what's up?

Baby, that's a sweet-Ass rim!

Look at us.

We all made it out alive.

And best of all,

No one got hurt.

[Boom]

[Car alarms blaring]

The important thing is that we're all together.

Drawn tog-- [Whang]

[Slurping]

[Children laughing]

[Whistling and instrumental playing]

Captioned by the national captioning institute --Www.Ncicap.Org--