All language subtitles for Kolchak.The.Night.Stalker.S01E03.They.Have.Been.They.Are.They.Will.Be.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-squalor_track3_eng

♪♪ [ Whistling ]

♪ ♪

[ Kolchak Narrating ] I knew
this one was more than just
the biggest story of my life.

It was the biggest story
in the lives of everyone
on this planet.

I fought for the story,
fought harder than
ever before,

because I knew it was more
than news-- much more.

I felt people should know about
it, so they could be prepared
when it happened again.

If it's possible
to be prepared for
something like this.

It began fairly quietly.
Lincoln Park Zoo, Chicago.

September 2, 5:30 a.m.

Shanka, the zoo's prize
cheetah, was expecting
her morning feeding.

It never came.

[ Wind Blowing ]

It started for me on a day
which is supposed to be
one of my happiest.

The day of the first game
of the first World Series
with the Cubs in 29 years.

- The day began badly.
- [ El Rumbling ]

As soon as Updyke took over
as temporary sports editor,

he began memorizing everything--
batting averages, bases stolen--

He could tell you more about
Hank Aaron and Sandy Koufax...

than you would
want to know.

But he forgot other things.

- Ron, where are my tickets?
- What tickets?

Well, the tickets
you promised me for
the World Series.

- Well, I don't remember that.
- You don't remember that?

Well, then let me
refresh your memory.

Two short weeks ago,
after your review of
the, uh, roller derby,

a hand was clutched around
your throat, attached to
one Snuffy Patechenko,

lead jammer for
the Atlanta Amazons,

207 pounds of furious,
frightening femininity.

- All muscle, no fat.
- Who are you talkin' about?

- Snuffy Patechenko.
- She's a human being. She would
have responded to reason.

You do not reason
with 207 pounds...

of outraged,
feminine jammer!

Your eyes were going glassy,
as she was cutting off
your breath.

I remember your review.
You called her "elephantine."

"Graceless."
"A hippo on casters."

What a thing to say
about a person, you pig.

She had broken someone's arm
the night before.

And she was about
to break your neck--
until I intervened.

Telling her that you were
a bleeder, internally.
Remember?

Hmm? Of course you do.
As the color returned to those
rosy little cheeks of yours,

you promised me one ticket
to the World Series.

- Oh, that explains why
I don't remember.
- Why?

- I was delirious.
- Uptight, you give me
those tickets,

or I will pick up where
Snuffy Patechenko left off.

I was only joking.
Of course I have
your ticket.

- And you call me uptight.
- Thank you very much, Ron.

- What was that?
- One ticket
to the ball game.

- Are you going?
- You bet your life
I'm going. You crazy?

That's too bad. I guess
I'll have to find someone
else to put on this thing.

- What thing?
- Oh, nothing. Just this cheetah
missing from the zoo.

You go to the game.
It's all right.

Certainly I'm going to
the game. Certainly.

[ Stammering ]
N-No, no. That was
yesterday's news.

Besides, it was a, uh--
It was a panther.

Oh, no. Yesterday a panther.
Today, a cheetah.

What, are you-- Are you
saying that two animals
are missing in two days?

Monique, are you
going to the game?

Wait, wait, wait.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.

- You mean, no report on it?
No ransom notes?
- No. No.

No hysterical old ladies
on the horn to the cops?

- Funny, isn't it?
- Yeah, it is.

- Monique--
- Didn't they--

- Didn't they have a couple of
animals die there last week?
- Did they?

- Yeah.
- [ Monique ] Mr. Vincenzo,
I'd be happy to go to the zoo.

- Well, I--
- Okay.

But if that press bus
leaves without me--

- Agreed?
- You know the time schedule.
You got a watch.

- What do you want from me?
- [ Muttering ]

Good-bye, Carl.
Get back to work.

- [ Chuckling ]
- [ Announcer On Radio ]
This is the day, fans,

- [ Radio Static ]
- that Chicago has been
awaiting for 29 long years.

After an amazing season,

the Chicago Cubs have
clawed their way to the top
of the National League.

They've won the play-offs,
and now, the first game
of the World Series.

[ Man On Scanner ]
Code 5, priority.

Code 5, priority.
201 in progress.

Officer down.
Raydyne Electronics,
Commerce and 24th Street.

[ Announcer On Radio ]
...to the rafters.
Standing room only.

In a few minutes,
we'll be talking--

[ Kolchak Narrating ]
It came over the police band,
a Code 5 priority.

Officer down. I caught
the address as static
obliterated the broadcast.

It was only a few minutes out of
my way. The zoo would still be
there. So would the ball game.

[ Announcer on Radio ]
Top of the first inning,
and Juan Bosca of the Cubs--

[ Tires Screeching ]

[ Announcer Continues,
Indistinct ]

It's okay. I'm the press.
It's all right. I.N.S.

Carl Kolchak. Go!

Carter! Stegman!
Cover the rear!

What's happening?
What's happening?

- Guy's been killed.
- What?

- Somebody
tripped the alarm.
- Inside?

Captain, what's
goin' on here?
What happened?

- I don't know.
- What's that?

- [ Indistinct ]
- [ Rumbling ]

Wh-Wha-- What do you--
What do you think happened?

I don't know what happened.
Looks like to me...

I'm gonna take some of
that overdue vacation time
I got comin'.

Wait a-- What was in there?
What did I see in there?
Was that steel?

No. Lead.
Two tons of lead ingots.

Lead ingots? But--
[ Stammering ]

They just disappeared.
I mean, we saw it
with our own eyes.

It disappeared
right in front of us.

If you know what's
good for you, you'll
disappear too, Kolchak.

- Show him how, Crowley.
Go on.
- Now wait a minute!

- Get him outta here!
- Wait a minute.
Come on, you guys!

Will you please
leave off the digits?
Watch the camera.

All right. Okay.

All right.
All right, you guys.
I'll be fine.

I'm goin', I'm goin'. All right?
Thanks very much, fellas.
You're very gentle.

[ Announcer On Radio ]
Curveball, taken outside,
ball one. Jefferson...

steps out of
the batter's box,
surveys the ballpark.

He'd like to
get ahold of one
and put it out of here.

- Give Boston an early lead.
Bosca has his signs.
- [ Car Doors Slamming ]

- [ Engine Starting ]
- Here's the windup,
and the pitch--

Line drive and a great
catch by Ortega,
the shortstop!

- He goes up and
one-hands the ball--
- [ Engine Revving ]

First half-inning
at one to nothing.
The Cubs are coming to bat.

[ Announcer ]
The Cubs are off to
the same great start...

as in their last series
appearance in 1945.

You recall, they beat
the Tigers in Game One
of that '45 classic.

- [ Static Continues ]
- [ Announcer Fading ]

[ Man ] Watch your language
and turn off the radio
while you're on the phone.

And remember, The Moze Kazan
Show is for you-- your
complaints and your opinions.

Now, back to the beef line.

[ Man #2 ] My beef is with
the lousy Street Department,

and the way they
screwed up my street.

- Mariposa Way--
- [ Announcer Fading In ]
...big man for the Cubs.

- Isn't a batter, but he had
a great season, hit .297--
- [ Static Continues ]

[ Man #2 ] When those clowns
in the Street Department
repaved Mariposa,

they dumped
the leftover asphalt
right on my lawn.

I got this terrible,
black gooey mess all over.

It smells terrible.
I can't get rid of it.

My grandfather fell in it.

We're still tryin'
to clean him.

The dog ran through it,
through the house.

The car. I wish you
could see it. It looks
like tar, with lumps.

[ Kolchak Narrating ]
Vincenzo's animal story was
still hanging over my head,

and chances
of seeing the game were
fading like lead ingots.

Radio reception was
so bad that listening
to the play-by-play...

was nothing short of painful.

But when all was said and done,
my problems were very minor...

compared to the problems
they had at Lincoln Park Zoo.

Very minor indeed.

- It's a viscid mass.
Probably--
- "Viscid?"

- Sticky.
- Oh.

Seems to have a lot
of acetone in it too.

My guess is that
they planned to foul up
the whole zoo with it,

- and then something
frightened them off.
- Who them?

Vandals. Probably the same ones
that sprayed our baby elephant
with gold paint.

- Poor Zapata.
- The elephant?

The keeper.
Showed up the next morning
after a three-day binge.

First thing he saw
was that elephant.
[ Gasps, Whistles ]

- [ Chuckles ] Poor Zapata.
- Uh-huh.

Didn't you have a leopard
die here yesterday? Hmm?

- Why?
- Heart attack.

- What about the cheetah?
- Heart attack.

Heart attack.

- Can I use your telephone?
- Mm-hmm.

- What about
the panda last week?
- Heart attack.

Heart attack.

Yeah, hello. I'd like to speak
to the program director
of the Moze Kazan Hour.

[ Clears Throat ]
Yeah, I'll wait.

Listen, besides being
stinky, just what is--
What is this gunk, anyway?

- Who knows?
- Yeah. Hello?

Yeah, you had a guy on
the show this afternoon...

that was complaining about
the Street Department dumping...

a whole, big pile
of evil-smelling asphalt
on his front lawn.

I'd like his name
and address, please.
[ Chuckling ] Uh, well--

Well, he certainly was.
I-I heard him on the radio
less than an hour ago.

Yeah, you cut him off
right in mid-sentence.

Well, I agree. You should know
who you have on your show.
Yes, thank--

[ Sighs ] Where'd
this stuff come from?

- Who cares?
- I care.

- [ Clears Throat ]
- Well, City Hall.

Yes, I'd like to speak
to your Street Department,
please.

About some asphalt paving
that was done on
Mariposa Way.

Thank you. Can I peek?

Yeah, hello? Uh-huh.
No record?

What? You must be mistaken.
I just heard the man speak
about it on the radio.

- Mariposa Way.
- [ Line Disconnects ]

[ Receiver Clatters ]

I don't know where we're
gonna get another panda.
They come from Tibet.

- The Commies have 'em all.
- The Commies.

Most people think
the panda's a bear.

- Actually, it's a raccoon.
- A raccoon.
With a heart attack?

- Mm-hmm.
- Maybe you fed it
too much cholesterol.

[ Ball Game On Radio,
Indistinct ]

Waitin' for the stretch.
The over-the-shoulder look.

And here comes the pitch
to Wachowski.

He swings.
It's a ground ball
to short.

[ Indistinct ]

Stinks, don't it?

Have you ever seen
anything like this?

Yeah, yeah. It really does.
Carl Kolchak of the I.N.S.,
Independent News Service.

Mr. Brindle, I heard you
on the radio. Boy, you sure
got some fast action here.

Action? One hour after
I make the phone call,

four trucks pull here,
from the Street Department?

What a bunch of idiots.

First they start
with these shovels.

Then they try this chemical
that turns the whole lawn
yellow.

Then they try these
flamethrowers--

the things that
they use to burn
weeds down with?

Look what they did. They
burned the hedge, the tree.
They almost got the house.

- Oh, do you mind?
- Oh, no. Please.

Thanks. Did they explain
how it got here?

No. They denied everything.
I tell you. This whole city is
going right down the toilet.

And it's not just
the Street Department.
It's everybody.

Police included. Did you
know that the crime rate
in this neighborhood...

- has gone straight up?
- Would you hold that
right there, please?

- Thank you.
Yes. That's very good.
- Can I show you something?

Look, come here.

- You see the busted window
up there?
- Yeah.

Henry! My neighbor,
Henry Ansgaroni.

Last night he was sitting
listening to records
with earphones on?

Someone comes along,
kicks out the window,

and rips out
his whole stereo system
while he's listening.

- Do you mean, right off
the porch there?
- Almost tore his head off.

- Well, didn't he
call the police?
- I called the police.

Know what they found?
The cabinet and the chassis...

in a culvert
in the back of the house.

But they never found
the electronic guts. Mrs. Fusco
lives in the house over there?

- Yeah.
- Someone killed
five of her cats.

Still leaves her with
a dozen or so, because
she's one of those kind.

Oh, boy, does that house smell.
Almost as bad as all this gop.

- [ Sighs, Stutters ]
M-Mr. Ara-- what's--
- Ansgaroni.

- Henry. Henry!
- Henry. Did he see
who took his stereo?

The only thing he saw was stars
when they yanked the earphones
off his skull. [ Chuckles ]

- Yeah. What time was that?
- Last night. I have to go.

Uh--

[ Car Door Closes,
Engine Starts ]

[ Announcer Continues,
Indistinct ]

Here he comes. Here's
the run for the plate.
He slides--

He's in there, and
the Red Sox have the first
run of the ball game.

The score, the Red Sox, 1,
the Cubs, nothing.

[ Kolchak Narrating ]
Keeter Hudson, out on
parole and out of money,

endangered the first
condition in an attempt
to improve the second.

- My purse!
- [ Horn Honks ]

[ Muttering ]

Keeter Hudson,
wealthy beyond his dreams,
a happy man.

Keeter didn't know
that his parole was
about to be canceled.

[ Whirring ]

[ Groaning ]

[ Announcer ] Here in the
seventh inning, the Cubs are
up. They still trail 1-0,

and that run scored by Boston
is growing taller and taller
on the scoreboard.

- [ Radio Whistling ]
- ...pumpin' the ball
by the Chicago hitters.

Hi there!

Boy, have I got
a surprise for you.

Why, you look
absolutely radiant!

There's only one thing that
puts that kind of sparkle
into a woman's eyes.

- Baloney.
- Yeah, well,
some call it that.

Did you have a nice lunch?
A few drinks ahead of time,
hmm?

Don't I wish.
I been cooped up here
all day with specimens.

- As you know.
- Yeah. Like this?

Now, I have a suspicion
that this...

is just exactly like
that gunk that you
picked up here at the zoo.

- So?
- So guess where
I found it?

On a lawn,
halfway across town.

Would you like to do
a survey and an analysis
of this for me?

I've got things to do.
Lots of 'em.

Oh, now. Come on, now.
Now, Doc Winestock. Bess.

- It is Bess, isn't it?
- Uh-huh.

Uh, Bess,
all you have to do...

is just put a little specimen
of this in a test tube
and shake it up,

add some chemicals, put it
on a slide, stick it under your
scope, and tell me what's in it.

- Now, is that asking too much?
- [ Sighs ]

[ Announcer ] Back to the mound,
he feeds it over to Weltzer,
and that's it for the Red Sox.

After seven and a half,
it remains, Boston 1,
the Cubs, nothing.

- [ Radio Off ]
- What's the matter?
Aren't you a Cub fan?

One of the absolute
staunchest.

If I hurry up,
I'll be able to catch
the last few innings.

- I've got a box seat.
- Hurry.

[ Gasps ] As a matter of fact,
I might be able to get two box
seats for tomorrow's game.

If I do the analysis
for you,

you're gonna run off
and print some crazy story.

So what? What do you care?
Unless you've been told
not to.

It doesn't matter
who does the analysis,

I'm still gonna write my story.
And draw my own conclusions.

However,
if you do the survey,
you can guide me...

in what I write. Hmm?

Mm, no. Absolutely no.

- Hmm?
- [ Groans ]

All right. Look.
It's obvious.

It's the same
as what we found.

- What's in it?
- Hydrochloric acid.
Acetone.

- Hydrochloric acid? Why?
- Hydrochloric acid is
a digestive juice.

- And acetone?
- And bone marrow.

Bone marrow?
Animal or human?

Animal. All of our animals
who were killed here...

showed puncture marks
at the major bone joints.

And every last dram of marrow
had been extracted from
their bones.

Hydrochloric--

You mean, they ate
the bone marrow?

It would seem that somebody
ate the marrow and threw up.

- But why?
- I don't know, Mr. Kolchak.

I don't either.

[ Announcer ] And the ball
game is over. The first game
of the World Series...

finishes on a tremendous play--
how about that, fans?

The fastest game
in World Series history.

- You know, you shouldn't
have used infrared film.
- Yeah. That's all I had.

- Look, something's
comin' out, see?
- Yeah.

Yeah. Be careful.
Be very careful with this.
It's very important.

Don't hassle technicians,
Kolchak. This takes
scientific precision.

A few seconds off,
and you get nothing.

Which is just
what you got: nothing.

[ Clicks On Light ]

Two tons of lead. What
could use two tons of lead?

- God's pencil?
- [ Shouts ]
Wait, wait, wait, don't!

- What are you doing? What
are you doing, ya dum-dum?
- It's garbage!

Now, listen. You reprint
that thing. This is very
important. Do you hear me?

And you put 'em in the files
and you lock 'em up. I'm making
'em your responsibility.

- Big deal.
- Yeah. Big, big deal.

- Gordy.
- Oh, hi, Kolchak. I guess
you heard we blew the game.

Cubs looked great, right up
to the top of the seventh.

Yeah. Well, I guess I'll
see it on a sports TV recap.

I've been trying to call you.
Did you know, last week,

- the number that won
the stiff lottery was 4-1-8?
- Yeah, so what?

You had 4-1-7.
You missed by a hair.

You been tryin' to reach me
all day to give me that
good news?

Mm-hmm. I want
to keep your faith up.
You see, you can win.

- So keep pluggin'.
- Yeah, Gordy, listen. Do you
have the autopsy report...

on the guard who was killed
out at Raydyne Electronics?

- Start pluggin' before
you ask any questions.
- That's what I figured.

- I'll give you 3-1-2
and 6-4-6. Okay?
- Whatever. Whatever.

- Now, what about
the autopsy reports?
- You know,

I've been thinking of changing
the lottery from birth year
to time of death.

- I mean, what's your opinion?
- Gordy, the autopsy report,
huh? ¿Donde esta?

[ Man ] Max, listen.
Bring the reports
down to my office--

I'm telling you for the last
time. There are no special
favors for anyone.

- You get it with
the rest of the reporters.
- What are you talkin' about?

Hi. Hi, Gordon. Kolchak.
What's goin' on?

For one thing, I'd like
to find the autopsy report
on the guard...

who was killed
at Raydyne Electronics.

- That's what I'd like to get.
- What's all the hysteria?
By all means.

I'll be glad to give it to you.
You got a pencil and paper?

I got my tape recorder here.
Go on. Start talkin'.

Okay. Here we are.

"Subject, Lloyd Reynolds.
Male Caucasian.
60 years of age.

"Prior history of myocardial
infarction. Immediate cause
of death, cardiac arrest.

"Blood sample, normal.
No external wounds.

"Stomach contents indicate
ingestion of heavy meal...

several hours before death."
That seems to be it, Carl.

- Uh-huh. I'd like
to look at the body.
- That's not permitted, Kolchak.

I'm sorry, Kolchak. I can't
permit you to go in the drawer.
That's against the rules here.

You know, you're right.
I'm sorry. I really am.
I apologize.

I guess my reporter's zeal
got the better of me.

Well, Carl. I think
this is kind of a landmark
in our relationship.

Stanley, I couldn't
agree with you more.

- So long.
- I'll put that away, sir.

♪♪ [ Kolchak Whistling ]

[ Wedemyer on Tape ]
"Prior history of
myocardial infarction.

"Pacemaker on the chest flap
in good condition.

"No evidence
of cardiac arrest.

"Inserting trocar into sternum
for marrow sample.

"Hey, Philip.
Look-Look at this.
It's bone dry.

"If you'll pardon
the expression,
there's no marrow. None.

Let's go for
the spinal column base
with the trocar."

[ Clicks Off ]

[ Whistles ]

- [ Crickets Chirping ]
- [ Kolchak Narrating ]
September 2, 10:00 p.m.

Leon Van Heusen.
Single, ambitious,
slightly paranoid.

By day, a television repairman,
by night an observer--
a man with a purpose.

The author of Mathmatico,
a universal language...

that Leon has refined for use
in unconventional communication.

[ Clicks ]

Unfortunately,
on September 2,
at 10:00 p.m.,

- [ No Audible Dialogue ]
- Leon learned the oldest word
in the universal language--

[ Screaming ]

I tell you that myself
and every member
of my staff are...

pulling double shifts,
as we always do in
a situation of this kind.

Every department
of this city's
law enforcement facility...

is operating
at peak efficiency.

And I anticipate
the arraignment of certain,
um, major suspects...

within, uh--

Well, within 24 hours.
Sorry.

Now, no questions at this
time, ladies and gentlemen,
if you please.

And because I'm sure
that you all know Raydyne
Industries is involved...

in some very classified work
on missile guidance systems.

We're talking about
national security,
ladies and gentlemen.

Uh, Captain!

Thank you, Captain.
What is the department's
official position...

upon the rumored
puncture marks in the body
of the Raydyne guard?

There's absolutely
no foundation for any
such rumors, Mr. Kolchak.

[ Stammering ] Wh-What about
those missing lead ingots?
Two tons of them?

Were they simply
just misplaced?

I have no reason
to believe otherwise.

No reason?
Well, you were there.
You saw what I saw.

- Those lead ingots, they just--
- You saw... what, Mr. Kolchak?

Well, I know it's gonna
sound very funny--

Yes, it probably will.
So if you don't mind,
may we continue?

You people are journalists.
Responsible journalists,
I'm sure.

But occasionally, in
your zeal to get the facts
before the public,

you sometimes forget
that you can...

impede the course
of justice by...

creating dissension,
terrifying the citizenry,

and, more important,
losing your own credibility.

Uh, Captain.

Sir, Raydyne Electronics
may have a national
security problem,

but what about the security
of Al and Fred's
TV Repair Shop,

and what about
Henry Ansgaroni's stereo,

and what about Mrs. Shank's
microwave oven?

I have no idea what you're
talking about, Mr. Kolchak.

But I'm sure
that's not unusual, is it,
ladies and gentlemen?

[ Laughing ]

No, but what issunusual
is that, in the last two
days, in this city,

electronic parts have
become about as desirable
and rare as diamonds--

or bone marrow.

[ Exhales Deeply ]
I have no comment on that
at this time.

[ Kolchak Narrating ] Quill
and I weren't the only ones
with watches that didn't work.

Everyone that had been at
Raydyne Electronics had
the same problem.

Question: What would stop
17 wristwatches at exactly
the same time?

Answer:
An electromagnetic field
so strong...

it might swing
a compass needle
off true north...

to the final truth.

Mm, marvelous!

- Delicious, Rich.
Just delicious.
- Merci, monsieur. Bon appétit.

Carl! Come on in!
You care to join me?

- No, no thanks.
- Courtesy of the editor
of the Times.

He's a sucker for the Cubs.
Oh, ho! Mmm.

- Tony, I'm onto
something big.
- Yeah.

- Very, very big.
- Yeah.

Quill has been covering
it up, under the name
of national security.

- Covering what up?
- A mess of lead ingots,
stacks,

that disappeared
before our very eyes.

A stone wall
that exploded outwards,
with no sound whatsoever.

- Totally silent!
- Mm-hmm.

And the dead guard
with all the marrow sucked
out of his bones.

Oh, Tony, I'm sorry. Forgive
me, I-- Maybe I shouldn't tell
you about that... now.

No. No, no, no, Carl.
You got a story to tell,
tell it.

You know, I--
Th-That doesn't bother me.
Go ahead.

All right.
Now, electronic parts
have been disappearing...

for the last two days,
all over this city.

Quill tried to cover that up
under national security too.

Are you beginning
to make the connection?

Mmm, no.

Then I'll have to start
at the beginning, with
the autopsy on the dead panda.

Carl, start somewhere
else, will ya?

Tony, listen. Are you sure
that you want me to talk
about this now?

Oh, yeah, sure.
Cast iron stomach, Carl.
Cast iron.

- Go ahead.
- Every animal that was
killed at the zoo...

had its marrow sucked out
of its bones, just like the
guard at Raydyne Electronics.

And in every case where
there was a dead human,
or a dead animal,

there was a puddle-- a pile--
of bluish, greenish, black bile.

I-It really stinks,
Tony. I mean, it's rancid.
Sickening.

And here's the capper.
This gooey substance...

is composed of
a strange combination
of chemical elements.

- Hydrochloric acid,
acetone and--
- Bone marrow.

Bone marrow! Right!
Now, guess where...

this strange,
unusual combination
of elements occurs.

Nowhere in this world.

I knew you were
going to say that, Carl.
I knew it! I really did!

- You want proof.
- Yeah.

- Be right back.
- [ Sighing ]

- Cervelle aux Bercy.
- What's that?

Brains.

Monique?

Monique?

You gave away my pictures!

You come out of there,
or I'm gonna suck the marrow
out of your bones!

That is no inducement for me
to come out, Mr. Kolchak.

Be reasonable. What could I do?
They had on suits, ties,
credentials--

They had some forms
from the Internal Revenue.
They knew all about me.

- They threatened an audit.
- So, you gave away my pictures?

I had to! They pull
an audit on me, and I go
off the nearest bridge.

Why should you be concerned
about the I.R.S.?

You're just out of college.
You've only been working
for a couple--

You did file
an income tax return?

They didn't look that good
after they were dried.

They looked fake.
I've seen better
in magazines.

- Why did you let 'em do it?
Those guys in the gray suits.
- Do what?

They stole the tape
that I stole.

Those are the same guys that
were out at Raydyne. Now they're
following me around here.

Please. Don't do this
to me, Carl.

I don't need
another U.F.O. story.
I've got enough problems.

- [ Sighs ]
- I didn't say U.F.O.

You said U.F.O.
They said U.F.O.

Carl, I was just
speaking generically. Now,
please, Carl. Be reasonable.

Remember what happened
the last time we put out one
of these kooky scare stories?

All the phones were tied up.
Police station phones
were tied up.

Police came down on me
like a ton of bricks!
[ Burps ]

Carl, please.
Leave it alone, will ya?

Sure. Sure, Tony.

Why don't you
have another seltzer
and go on home and go to bed?

[ Door Closing ]

I don't want
another seltzer.

[ Kolchak Narrating ]
Have you ever tried to
report a U.F.O. sighting?

I'll save you the trouble.
There is not a single government
agency still in existence...

that will admit to any
interest in the subject.

If you seem to be insistent,
they will refer you to
a private organization.

[ Woman ]
Um, I'm very excited...

to be able to share with
you all this evening...

my experiences
with the flying saucer.

Uh, I only hope that I can
remember all the details,

because it was--
it was very, very exciting.

I only spent about an hour
aboard the saucer itself.

- Do you want an application?
- To what?

- I-- Wait.
- And then they served me
something that tasted--

oh, not unlike ginger ale
and bourbon. [ Chuckles ]

And that's when, uh...

their leader, a very
smart-looking alien,
got a little fresh with me.

But when I let him
know that I was firm--
determined--

he kept his extensions
to himself.

[ Giggling ]
It was quite exciting.

Have any of your members
reported any sightings
the last few days?

Well, Leon Van Heusen,
one of our members, called
in an Opus last Monday night.

- An "appis"?
- No, Opus. Opus is, "One
Party, Unverified Sighting."

- Oh, yes.
- Oh, here it is.
Here it is.

I wonder why he didn't
petition the authentication
committee.

- Well, Leon's a touch
paranoid. Yes. Yes.
- Ohh.

- Yes, the Opus was--
- Shh!

"The destructive star,
called Wormwood,

is not a star
but a missile."

Now, upside down
and backwards,
it reads "Doomwrom."

Doomroom? Doo--

- That doesn't spell "Doomwrom."
- Well, it certainly does.

- The Opus was sighted
at Snake, uh, Park?
- If that's what it says.

- "Snake Rock," here.
Yes, Snake Rock.
- Does that spell "Doomwrom?"

I don't know.
How many members in
the Highland Park area?

- Just Leon. Yes.
- Just Leon. And where
is this Snake Rock?

Snake Rock.
There's a bus that-- No,
the bus doesn't run there.

- Do you have a car?
- Yes, I have a car.

Excuse me, Mr. Gough.
I don't understand what
you're talking about.

- "Doomwrom."
It certainly does.
- My dear. My dear.

- Backwards and upside down.
- My dear, it's plain--
It spells "Droomdrum."

- No, I am sorry, but--
- Okay, there are two--
Call a cab!

[ Shutting Off Engine ]

[ Clicking ]

[ Click, Tape Rewinding ]

[ Man On Tape ] Your present
location is the third planet
of our star system.

We are peaceful. I will now
address you in Mathmatico.

The universal language.

[ Screams ]

[ Clicks Off Tape ]

[ Wind Blowing ]

This is Riley, at the
planetarium. You better get
a squad over here right away.

Hey, old-timer, I didn't
mean to disturb you--

[ Wind Blowing ]

[ Recharger Buzzing ]

[ Sirens Wailing ]

Let's get some lights
on in here.

I think there's some switches
over by that console panel.

- Get away from that console!
Don't go near that thing!
- What the hell are you doin'?

- Paul?
- He's dead.

Any luck over there?
Get some lights!

- [ Wind Roaring ]
- [ Cops Screaming ]

Get back! Get away
from that thing!

Back up!
Get outta there.

What are you guys pointin' at?
You can't see anything anyway.
Listen, I can stop it.

- Stop it? Stop what?
- I don't know, but whatever
it is, it can't stand light.

I was alone with it in here,
and I stopped it with this.
It was lookin' at maps!

- Map? What kinda map?
- Maps! Maps. Star maps.
Look up there.

See? Galaxies.
See, look. Over there.

Well, there's
nothin' over there.
I don't see anything.

Anybody see anything? Huh?

- What?
What do you see, Kolchak?
- I don't see anything either.

But that doesn't mean
that there's nothing there.

Somebody throw a net over
Kolchak, will ya? I think he's
about ready for the rubber room.

Quill, I talked with
Dr. Heinz Wollenweider over at
the Fermi Research Institute.

Now, he told me
that the human eye
cannot detect...

certain portions
of the light spectrum.

Now, we know that X-rays exist.
We know that cosmic rays exist.

The fact that
we can't see them doesn't
mean they aren't there!

[ Scoffs ]
If you can't see it,
how do you know it's there?

Infrared film.
It's sensitive to heat.

Heat makes the image.

The flash from this flashgun
saved my life just now.

Now, either you go out
and talk to your friends
from Washington,

or wherever they're from,
or I will.

Wait a minute, you--

You mean, the light from
that flashgun of yours
stopped this... whatever?

- Dead in its tracks.
If it had made any.
- Yeah?

All right,
we'll see about that.

Stand by here.

[ Siren Wailing ]

- [ Woman On Police Radio ]
- [ Muttering, Indistinct ]

[ No Audible Dialogue ]

All right, you people.
Gather round here, now.

Get that mobile unit
with the lights.
Bring 'em in here.

And hit the entrance
with those big lights.

Where-- You're nuts.
You're gonna get
your heads taken.

[ Wind Blowing ]

[ Quill ] Ted, get
that man over there.

Somebody get on that fire.

Eddie?
Move this out of here
and get an ambulance in.

- Quill--
- Yeah? Kolchak.

There's gotta be an explanation
for this. There's gotta be.
Just let me figure it out.

You gotta figure out how
you're gonna earn a living
from now on,

because of now,
you're through as
a paperboy in this town.

It had to be the camera.
It had to be! What else
could it be?

The lights! The lights
just irritated it.

- They wanna talk
to you, Captain.
- Yeah. All right.

[ Quill ]
Get if from the other
side there!

[ Chattering, Indistinct ]

[ Buzzing ]

The recharger!

- [ Police Radio Chatter ]
- [ Fire Extinguishers
Spraying ]

Hit the front part
up there too.

Quill! Captain, I got it.

No, look,
i-i-it was the camera,
but it wasn't the light.

Is this another one
of your stupid theories,
Kolchak?

Huh? You don't know when
you're well off, do you?

No, listen.
No. No. It was
the battery recharger.

The nickel cadmium batteries
in there. They emit
a high-pitched whine.

- Listen.
- [ Buzzing, Beeping ]

It hurts, doesn't it, huh?
Who knows what it
sounds like to it.

You know what I'd like
to do to you, Kolchak?
And I'd do it, too,

only you're
gonna be dealt with
at a much higher level.

I don't care.
I don't care. Just get
on the walkie-talkie...

and tell your friends
from Washington, I figured
out how the camera works.

Those people are gonna
do to you what me...

and no other cop
in this city's ever
been able to do.

They're gonna
take care of you good.
Once and for all, Kolchak!

I don't care about your threats.
Just get on the horn
and tell 'em.

- Don't be stupid, please!
- You want me
to get on the horn?

Get outta here.

[ Wind Blowing ]

[ Buzzing ]

[ Buzzing ]

[ Buzzing ]

[ Whirring ]

[ Whirring Resumes, Ends ]

[ Kolchak Narrating ] They
tried to make a little park out
of the woods near Snake Rock--

daffodils, tulips--
but they couldn't
get anything to grow.

There was an area shaped
like a saucer at the bottom.

If you want to see it,
you'll have to hurry.

Our park commission decided
overnight to do extensive
reclamation work...

in that particular spot.

They're filling it in
with concrete.

"What happened? It's all
a point of view really.

"A traveler has a breakdown,
stops to fix it, gets a road
map, has a bite to eat...

"and goes on his way--
it's happened to all of us.

"This traveler happened to be
light-years off his course,

"instead of miles.

"As for me?

"Well, I haven't heard from
the boys in the sedan--

yet."