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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,811 --> 00:00:10,425 - Hello? - Amy! How ya been? 2 00:00:10,535 --> 00:00:14,402 Shh. Glenn, the baby just went to sleep. 3 00:00:14,403 --> 00:00:17,640 Oh, yeah. Every day's an adventure, huh? 4 00:00:17,641 --> 00:00:21,568 Hey, did you know that newborn girls can have a mini-period? 5 00:00:21,569 --> 00:00:23,947 That was a surprise. 6 00:00:23,948 --> 00:00:25,958 Glenn, this really is not a good time. 7 00:00:25,959 --> 00:00:28,117 I just got back from the hospital three hours ago; 8 00:00:28,118 --> 00:00:30,636 - I'm exhausted. - Yeah, uh, yeah, sure. Okay. 9 00:00:30,637 --> 00:00:32,854 Uh, well, we'll just catch up at work. 10 00:00:32,857 --> 00:00:34,524 Okay, I'll see you in six weeks. 11 00:00:34,526 --> 00:00:36,059 Yeah, sure. Or... 12 00:00:36,061 --> 00:00:37,060 today. 13 00:00:37,062 --> 00:00:37,628 What? 14 00:00:37,629 --> 00:00:41,465 So, apparently, a person doesn't qualify for leave 15 00:00:41,466 --> 00:00:43,715 if they work here under a year. 16 00:00:43,717 --> 00:00:46,384 I know. I've been there 15 years. 17 00:00:46,386 --> 00:00:51,336 Yes, but when you were suspended for... you know... 18 00:00:52,859 --> 00:00:55,944 Um, your clock was started over. 19 00:00:56,491 --> 00:00:57,979 Are you [bleep] kidding me? 20 00:00:57,981 --> 00:01:00,815 Look, I'm sorry. I tried to fight it. 21 00:01:00,817 --> 00:01:03,118 But if you don't come in, 22 00:01:03,120 --> 00:01:05,904 they are not gonna let me keep your job open. 23 00:01:06,490 --> 00:01:07,518 Okay. 24 00:01:08,158 --> 00:01:09,447 Well, then... 25 00:01:09,983 --> 00:01:11,840 I guess I'll see you soon. 26 00:01:12,412 --> 00:01:13,832 Thanks. And... 27 00:01:14,631 --> 00:01:16,331 try to hurry, 'cause technically 28 00:01:16,333 --> 00:01:17,749 your shift started an hour ago. 29 00:01:18,028 --> 00:01:19,501 You were supposed to bring in doughnuts. 30 00:01:19,503 --> 00:01:21,463 A lot of people were really angry. 31 00:01:24,174 --> 00:01:25,390 Okay, bye-bye. 32 00:01:30,473 --> 00:01:32,154 I can't believe you have to be here 33 00:01:32,155 --> 00:01:34,003 two days after having a baby. 34 00:01:34,004 --> 00:01:37,037 It's indicative of the disdain this culture has 35 00:01:37,038 --> 00:01:38,339 for working mothers. 36 00:01:38,659 --> 00:01:40,766 Look, I don't even have the energy to be mad. 37 00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:45,345 I'm just exhausted and sore and hormonal, 38 00:01:45,346 --> 00:01:47,123 and I'm wearing pajamas, 39 00:01:47,124 --> 00:01:48,692 and I'm just a mess. 40 00:01:48,693 --> 00:01:50,458 No, you're not a mess. You're... you know what? 41 00:01:50,459 --> 00:01:52,376 Honestly, you're... you're really beautiful. 42 00:01:52,378 --> 00:01:53,379 You look beautiful right now. 43 00:01:53,380 --> 00:01:56,059 You've got like a... like a post-pregnancy glow. 44 00:01:56,060 --> 00:01:57,654 Aww, that's so sweet. 45 00:01:58,006 --> 00:01:59,570 Do you wanna make out? 46 00:02:00,825 --> 00:02:02,074 No. 47 00:02:02,938 --> 00:02:04,075 Well... 48 00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:06,441 Rain check, though. 49 00:02:17,981 --> 00:02:20,133 Sandra! Christ. It took you long enough. 50 00:02:20,134 --> 00:02:21,674 I've been dialing for an hour. 51 00:02:21,675 --> 00:02:22,938 Are you still in the hospital? 52 00:02:22,939 --> 00:02:24,274 Yeah, sucks. 53 00:02:24,276 --> 00:02:26,200 I'm hooked up to a catheter. 54 00:02:26,201 --> 00:02:28,344 After a C-section, they don't let you pee on your own. 55 00:02:28,345 --> 00:02:30,898 But number twos? I'm in the driver's seat. 56 00:02:30,899 --> 00:02:34,221 Anyway, ugh, I'm bored. What's going on? 57 00:02:34,479 --> 00:02:36,858 Remember the shopping cart that's missing a wheel? 58 00:02:36,859 --> 00:02:38,789 Well, bad news, it is now missing... 59 00:02:38,791 --> 00:02:40,660 Hey, shh, shh, shut up. Shut up, shut up. 60 00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:43,126 I think that guy behind you is shoplifting. 61 00:02:43,128 --> 00:02:44,270 - Really? - Yeah. 62 00:02:44,271 --> 00:02:45,267 You're gonna need to get a better look. 63 00:02:45,268 --> 00:02:46,065 Follow him. 64 00:02:46,617 --> 00:02:47,443 Okay. 65 00:02:48,972 --> 00:02:51,087 Hey, idiot, forgetting something? 66 00:02:51,899 --> 00:02:54,030 Oh, I didn't realize that you... 67 00:02:54,031 --> 00:02:55,019 - Yeah. - Right. 68 00:02:58,310 --> 00:02:59,817 Here we go. 69 00:03:00,851 --> 00:03:02,433 Oh, I think I lost him. 70 00:03:03,001 --> 00:03:05,379 Dude, is that your mom again? 71 00:03:05,380 --> 00:03:08,941 Oh, yeah. She just has a lot of questions about "Westworld." 72 00:03:09,321 --> 00:03:10,574 Everybody's a robot. 73 00:03:10,575 --> 00:03:12,820 Excuse me, I'm looking for... 74 00:03:13,562 --> 00:03:14,900 Glenn Sturgis. 75 00:03:14,902 --> 00:03:15,752 Mm-hmm. 76 00:03:15,753 --> 00:03:17,664 I have an interview for seasonal work. 77 00:03:17,665 --> 00:03:19,216 My name's Kimmer with a K. 78 00:03:19,217 --> 00:03:20,652 Ah. Is, uh... 79 00:03:21,216 --> 00:03:22,851 did you lose your shoes, or... 80 00:03:23,599 --> 00:03:25,020 I don't believe in shoes. 81 00:03:25,489 --> 00:03:26,855 Oh. 82 00:03:26,857 --> 00:03:28,857 Shoes aren't something you believe in. 83 00:03:29,008 --> 00:03:30,560 They exist. That's a fact. 84 00:03:31,060 --> 00:03:33,677 Okay. So, Glenn? 85 00:03:33,679 --> 00:03:35,881 Uh, straight back, left at grocery. 86 00:03:36,942 --> 00:03:38,408 Namaste. 87 00:03:39,100 --> 00:03:42,318 Left... okay, wait, left where... 88 00:03:42,571 --> 00:03:43,968 You want to bet he hires her? 89 00:03:43,969 --> 00:03:45,460 She's not wearing shoes. 90 00:03:45,461 --> 00:03:47,185 Of course he's gonna hire her. 91 00:03:47,186 --> 00:03:50,180 That's such a good idea to just watch him from work. 92 00:03:50,181 --> 00:03:52,718 You're gonna save so much on babysitters. 93 00:03:52,719 --> 00:03:55,287 What? No. Adam's there. 94 00:03:55,618 --> 00:03:58,417 I'm not just gonna leave Parker at home alone all day. 95 00:03:58,418 --> 00:03:59,525 He's not a hamster. 96 00:04:00,372 --> 00:04:02,675 Parker. You named your baby Parker? 97 00:04:03,208 --> 00:04:04,129 - Yeah - Huh. 98 00:04:04,130 --> 00:04:06,425 Like officially. 99 00:04:06,426 --> 00:04:08,711 I take it you're not fans? 100 00:04:08,712 --> 00:04:10,495 No. 101 00:04:10,496 --> 00:04:12,525 - I love it. - Yeah. 102 00:04:12,526 --> 00:04:15,253 - It's so cute. - It's so distinct. 103 00:04:16,388 --> 00:04:18,221 I bet you there's a story there. 104 00:04:18,223 --> 00:04:20,010 Yeah. There's a story there. 105 00:04:20,011 --> 00:04:22,995 Like, some relative who died right before he was born? 106 00:04:23,233 --> 00:04:25,330 Nope, I went to a baby-naming website 107 00:04:25,331 --> 00:04:26,726 and saw the name Parker. 108 00:04:26,727 --> 00:04:28,863 - Even better story. - Mm, okay, yeah. 109 00:04:28,864 --> 00:04:30,385 That makes sense then. 110 00:04:31,231 --> 00:04:32,402 Parker. 111 00:04:39,750 --> 00:04:42,286 Do not bring a pretzel salad to Thanksgiving dinner. 112 00:04:42,287 --> 00:04:43,504 Please, Elias. 113 00:04:43,505 --> 00:04:45,582 Hey, Glenn. Uh, so, uh... 114 00:04:45,584 --> 00:04:48,734 real quick, you hired that woman Kimmer? 115 00:04:52,489 --> 00:04:55,028 Oh, yeah, she's great. 116 00:04:55,029 --> 00:04:56,606 I know she's still learning, 117 00:04:56,607 --> 00:04:58,523 but she is gonna be Employee of the Month 118 00:04:58,524 --> 00:04:59,648 in no time. 119 00:04:59,649 --> 00:05:00,847 Just out of curiosity, 120 00:05:00,848 --> 00:05:02,879 do you plan on hiring anybody else? 121 00:05:03,106 --> 00:05:04,932 Uh, well, there's one more position to fill, 122 00:05:04,933 --> 00:05:06,770 and I'm doing interviews all day. 123 00:05:06,772 --> 00:05:08,572 Oh. Well, you know, 'cause we were thinking 124 00:05:08,573 --> 00:05:11,347 that if you were too busy with the baby 125 00:05:11,348 --> 00:05:12,803 and stuff you had to do in the store, 126 00:05:12,804 --> 00:05:15,284 maybe we could do the interviews. 127 00:05:15,285 --> 00:05:16,402 What, without me? 128 00:05:16,403 --> 00:05:18,566 Well, no, I mean, we wouldn't actually be alone. 129 00:05:18,567 --> 00:05:21,268 'Cause you would be there in the... 130 00:05:21,269 --> 00:05:23,979 - You taught us. - The wisdom that you impart. 131 00:05:23,980 --> 00:05:26,936 You know, it's like footprints in the sand. 132 00:05:26,937 --> 00:05:28,040 Oh, yeah. 133 00:05:28,041 --> 00:05:30,265 I was carrying you the whole time. 134 00:05:30,266 --> 00:05:31,877 That's what I'm talking about. 135 00:05:31,878 --> 00:05:33,072 - Just like Jesus. - There you go. 136 00:05:33,073 --> 00:05:35,566 Okay, yes. You can do it. 137 00:05:35,567 --> 00:05:36,810 - Awesome. - You won't be disappointed. 138 00:05:36,811 --> 00:05:38,301 - Great. - I can't believe how 139 00:05:38,303 --> 00:05:40,298 you guys have grown up. 140 00:05:40,299 --> 00:05:41,813 - Aww. - My boys. 141 00:05:41,814 --> 00:05:42,784 Oh, okay. 142 00:05:42,785 --> 00:05:44,891 - My big boys. - Little weird. 143 00:05:44,893 --> 00:05:46,889 I'm gonna call you my big boys from now on. 144 00:05:46,890 --> 00:05:49,625 - Oh, don't do that. - I love my big, big boys. 145 00:05:49,626 --> 00:05:52,733 Okay, there it is. 146 00:05:52,735 --> 00:05:54,367 Ugh. 147 00:05:54,572 --> 00:05:56,476 Look, we don't have to impress them. 148 00:05:56,477 --> 00:05:57,642 You don't have to wear a tie. 149 00:05:57,644 --> 00:05:59,344 I never get a chance to wear a tie, 150 00:05:59,346 --> 00:06:01,546 so I'm gonna go for it when I can. 151 00:06:02,516 --> 00:06:05,533 - Yikes. - Hey, Ames. 152 00:06:05,535 --> 00:06:07,118 Y-you okay? 153 00:06:07,120 --> 00:06:09,120 Yeah, I'm not trying to flatter you or anything, 154 00:06:09,122 --> 00:06:10,355 but you look like the homeless lady 155 00:06:10,357 --> 00:06:12,057 who sleeps next to the loading dock. 156 00:06:12,059 --> 00:06:13,927 I've never been so tired. 157 00:06:14,428 --> 00:06:15,631 I was doing go-backs, 158 00:06:15,632 --> 00:06:17,729 and I couldn't remember where the Toy aisle was. 159 00:06:17,731 --> 00:06:19,804 And then I found it, and I unloaded my cart 160 00:06:19,805 --> 00:06:21,466 but then realized that firewood 161 00:06:21,468 --> 00:06:22,801 doesn't belong in the Toy aisle. 162 00:06:22,803 --> 00:06:24,769 And then I think I took someone else's cart, 163 00:06:24,771 --> 00:06:26,271 because I don't think we think we sell this bag 164 00:06:26,273 --> 00:06:29,174 with a wallet and keys and someone's mail in it. 165 00:06:29,176 --> 00:06:31,292 Amy, you're, uh... 166 00:06:31,294 --> 00:06:32,222 you... 167 00:06:34,598 --> 00:06:36,729 Are you [bleep] kidding me? 168 00:06:38,218 --> 00:06:39,718 She's lactating. 169 00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:41,524 Yeah, I know how breasts work. 170 00:06:42,055 --> 00:06:43,588 Ugh. Parker. 171 00:06:43,590 --> 00:06:45,490 She's just setting that kid up for failure. 172 00:06:45,492 --> 00:06:46,825 Totally. 173 00:06:46,827 --> 00:06:48,793 Sophomore year, there was a girl in my class 174 00:06:48,795 --> 00:06:50,945 named Wanda that was getting cyber-bullied. 175 00:06:51,268 --> 00:06:54,726 The guidance counselor was just like, "Uh, yeah", 176 00:06:54,907 --> 00:06:56,073 your name's Wanda." 177 00:06:56,764 --> 00:06:58,213 But she's the mom. 178 00:06:59,339 --> 00:07:01,740 So, if you saw a woman beating her child, 179 00:07:01,741 --> 00:07:04,342 would you say, "She's the mom" and walk away? 180 00:07:04,344 --> 00:07:05,643 Or would you do something about it? 181 00:07:05,645 --> 00:07:07,645 I mean, I would probably do nothing, 182 00:07:07,647 --> 00:07:09,380 but I would want to do something. 183 00:07:09,382 --> 00:07:12,715 There is an innocent child whose name is Parker. 184 00:07:13,664 --> 00:07:15,326 Are you just gonna walk away? 185 00:07:17,057 --> 00:07:18,623 Not this time. 186 00:07:18,625 --> 00:07:22,260 Wow, Penny, you have a lot of references. 187 00:07:22,262 --> 00:07:24,546 50. I basically ask anyone I meet. 188 00:07:24,548 --> 00:07:26,231 Hey, can I have a reference? 189 00:07:26,233 --> 00:07:27,682 I'm just kidding. 190 00:07:27,684 --> 00:07:29,501 The thing you have to understand about me is, 191 00:07:29,503 --> 00:07:31,669 I have a great sense of humor. 192 00:07:32,214 --> 00:07:33,304 Seems it. 193 00:07:33,306 --> 00:07:34,973 You do have a lot of retail experience. 194 00:07:34,975 --> 00:07:37,342 Oh, no. Everything on that resume is a lie. 195 00:07:38,178 --> 00:07:40,078 I'm kidding. 196 00:07:40,080 --> 00:07:42,113 You two should've seen your faces. 197 00:07:42,115 --> 00:07:44,682 You don't really have an off switch, do you, Penny? 198 00:07:44,684 --> 00:07:46,052 I don't! 199 00:07:46,703 --> 00:07:49,888 But I did work at a PDQ Mart for two years 200 00:07:49,890 --> 00:07:51,289 I'm not afraid of hard work. 201 00:07:51,291 --> 00:07:53,641 Kind of a work horse. 202 00:07:54,774 --> 00:07:55,994 We'll let you know. 203 00:07:55,996 --> 00:07:57,328 Oh, could you actually 204 00:07:57,330 --> 00:07:58,283 let me know today? 205 00:07:58,284 --> 00:07:59,881 I have another job offer. 206 00:07:59,883 --> 00:08:02,634 "An offer I can't refuse." 207 00:08:02,977 --> 00:08:04,169 I also do impressions. 208 00:08:04,171 --> 00:08:05,336 We're gonna pass. 209 00:08:05,338 --> 00:08:06,065 Yeah, big-time pass. 210 00:08:06,066 --> 00:08:07,869 Just a medium-sized pass. 211 00:08:08,508 --> 00:08:10,341 Hey Glenn, can I pump in here? 212 00:08:10,343 --> 00:08:11,876 The bathroom is disgusting. 213 00:08:11,878 --> 00:08:13,812 Oh, you wanna pump your... 214 00:08:13,814 --> 00:08:15,113 you want to pump them in here? 215 00:08:15,115 --> 00:08:16,397 Yeah, if that's okay. 216 00:08:16,399 --> 00:08:17,927 Yeah, of course it's okay. 217 00:08:18,418 --> 00:08:19,734 Why wouldn't it be okay? 218 00:08:19,735 --> 00:08:20,828 I'm not a monster. 219 00:08:21,629 --> 00:08:22,229 Great. 220 00:08:22,230 --> 00:08:24,322 I'll, uh, just get out of here 221 00:08:24,324 --> 00:08:26,057 and make room for you. 222 00:08:26,285 --> 00:08:28,951 And you can take off your shirt and your bra 223 00:08:29,231 --> 00:08:30,628 and get down to it. 224 00:08:30,630 --> 00:08:32,511 That's how it works, yup. 225 00:08:32,899 --> 00:08:35,293 Oh, I'll just clear some room for you. 226 00:08:35,294 --> 00:08:36,901 No, that's not necessary. 227 00:08:36,903 --> 00:08:38,436 I'm just gonna sit and... No, no, it's- 228 00:08:38,438 --> 00:08:39,496 it's my pleasure. 229 00:08:40,006 --> 00:08:40,872 Okay. 230 00:08:44,244 --> 00:08:46,311 It's just kind of a pressing situation. 231 00:08:46,313 --> 00:08:47,712 Yeah, no, I got it. 232 00:08:47,714 --> 00:08:49,447 - It's full, and... - I get it, I get it. 233 00:08:54,054 --> 00:08:56,054 Just... 234 00:08:56,550 --> 00:08:57,288 Okay, here I go. 235 00:08:57,290 --> 00:08:59,431 Okay. 236 00:09:00,193 --> 00:09:01,518 Oh, wait, hey! 237 00:09:02,351 --> 00:09:04,508 Why don't you use the lactation room? 238 00:09:04,865 --> 00:09:06,681 We have a lactation room? 239 00:09:09,055 --> 00:09:10,668 This is a utility closet. 240 00:09:11,040 --> 00:09:13,811 No, no. It's more of a multipurpose room. 241 00:09:13,874 --> 00:09:17,075 I mean, come on, you put some flowers in here 242 00:09:17,077 --> 00:09:19,811 and some candles, and it'll be great. 243 00:09:20,267 --> 00:09:21,446 - Thanks. - Yeah. 244 00:09:25,185 --> 00:09:27,285 Heather, your grandmother's cameo 245 00:09:27,287 --> 00:09:28,952 is not a part of our dress code. 246 00:09:29,422 --> 00:09:31,606 Elias, get your fingers out of your mouth 247 00:09:31,608 --> 00:09:33,041 and wash your hands. 248 00:09:33,043 --> 00:09:34,826 Soap and water, not just a rinse! 249 00:09:35,562 --> 00:09:37,695 Oh, man, I don't think this is working. 250 00:09:37,696 --> 00:09:39,604 Yeah, I'm glad you said that. 251 00:09:39,635 --> 00:09:41,457 I haven't been able to pee or take lunch... 252 00:09:41,458 --> 00:09:42,467 Here's what we're gonna do. 253 00:09:42,469 --> 00:09:43,858 I need you to get 12 machine-grade rebars 254 00:09:43,905 --> 00:09:44,911 and some barrel bolts. 255 00:09:44,912 --> 00:09:46,723 Now, Henry has a welding torch in his locker. 256 00:09:46,724 --> 00:09:48,531 He'll deny that it's there, but it's there. 257 00:09:48,860 --> 00:09:50,408 - Okay. - Get the 8-inch rebars, 258 00:09:50,410 --> 00:09:52,010 not the 12-inch. Do you understand me? 259 00:09:52,012 --> 00:09:54,579 - I understand. - I don't think you do. 260 00:09:55,916 --> 00:09:57,715 So which chair should I sit in? 261 00:09:57,717 --> 00:09:59,100 Oh, whichever. 262 00:10:04,958 --> 00:10:08,293 So, um, tell us what your greatest strength is. 263 00:10:08,295 --> 00:10:09,761 My greatest strength, I guess, 264 00:10:09,763 --> 00:10:12,397 would be strength. 265 00:10:12,399 --> 00:10:13,721 Strength? 266 00:10:13,722 --> 00:10:15,400 Physical strength. 267 00:10:15,402 --> 00:10:19,404 Okay, and what would your greatest weakness be? 268 00:10:19,406 --> 00:10:20,599 I guess... 269 00:10:21,141 --> 00:10:22,321 bullets? 270 00:10:23,243 --> 00:10:25,743 Bullets. Good. 271 00:10:25,745 --> 00:10:29,347 Okay, so why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself? 272 00:10:29,349 --> 00:10:31,215 Well, Jonah. Garret. 273 00:10:31,217 --> 00:10:32,550 What I hear you asking me is, 274 00:10:32,552 --> 00:10:34,519 you want me to tell you about myself. 275 00:10:34,944 --> 00:10:36,747 Would you say that's correct? 276 00:10:37,257 --> 00:10:38,656 Yes, that's what I said. 277 00:10:38,658 --> 00:10:39,734 I'm just gonna sit in this one. 278 00:10:39,735 --> 00:10:40,959 That's fine. 279 00:10:40,961 --> 00:10:42,894 Unless it's the wrong chair. 280 00:10:42,896 --> 00:10:44,429 Are you sure you don't want to go to the bathroom? 281 00:10:44,431 --> 00:10:45,397 I said I'm fine. I'm fine. 282 00:10:45,398 --> 00:10:47,799 Just go ahead. Just go ahead. Here. 283 00:10:48,501 --> 00:10:50,785 Okay. 284 00:10:50,787 --> 00:10:51,803 So... 285 00:10:58,278 --> 00:11:00,246 That's an interesting tattoo. 286 00:11:03,116 --> 00:11:04,506 I like to play tennis. 287 00:11:05,352 --> 00:11:07,685 Sure, who doesn't like to play tennis? 288 00:11:08,580 --> 00:11:10,288 It's a [bleep] job interview. 289 00:11:10,290 --> 00:11:12,857 Did you look at yourself in the mirror before you came here? 290 00:11:12,859 --> 00:11:14,892 Pick the chair next to the grizzly, 291 00:11:14,894 --> 00:11:16,207 it says courage. 292 00:11:16,629 --> 00:11:19,196 Pick the chair near the aisle, says you want to run away. 293 00:11:19,197 --> 00:11:20,665 Just pick a damn chair. 294 00:11:22,852 --> 00:11:24,168 Boom! 295 00:11:24,170 --> 00:11:25,970 Sorry, that's the wrong chair. 296 00:11:26,345 --> 00:11:27,666 So close. 297 00:11:28,541 --> 00:11:30,343 Oh, um, I'm in here. 298 00:11:30,344 --> 00:11:31,768 Oh, I'm sorry. 299 00:11:32,374 --> 00:11:34,912 But this is where I come to pray. 300 00:11:35,369 --> 00:11:38,549 Um, okay, well, could you 301 00:11:38,551 --> 00:11:40,018 maybe come back later? 302 00:11:40,020 --> 00:11:42,787 Actually, Allah is pretty strict on time. 303 00:11:42,789 --> 00:11:44,558 He can't wait ten minutes? 304 00:11:46,026 --> 00:11:48,609 - You think? - Okay, I'm sorry. Proceed. 305 00:11:49,095 --> 00:11:50,013 Keep going. 306 00:11:50,263 --> 00:11:51,746 Allahu Akbar. 307 00:12:06,780 --> 00:12:09,278 God, these people are all terrible. 308 00:12:09,783 --> 00:12:12,383 Maybe Glenn really was getting the cream of the crop. 309 00:12:12,385 --> 00:12:15,420 Well, that's a real paradigm shift. 310 00:12:15,837 --> 00:12:18,637 You know, it might be rose-colored glasses, but 311 00:12:19,209 --> 00:12:20,558 I kinda like that Penny girl. 312 00:12:20,560 --> 00:12:22,646 She was great. And funny. 313 00:12:22,647 --> 00:12:24,162 We should've hired her. 314 00:12:24,164 --> 00:12:25,313 Then why did you say no? 315 00:12:25,315 --> 00:12:26,564 'Cause you told me not to. 316 00:12:26,566 --> 00:12:28,132 - No, I didn't. - Yeah, you did. 317 00:12:28,134 --> 00:12:29,300 You said it, like, with your eyes. 318 00:12:29,302 --> 00:12:30,935 You gave me that look, like no way. 319 00:12:30,937 --> 00:12:32,070 My eyes don't say stuff. 320 00:12:32,072 --> 00:12:33,354 I don't have expressive eyes. 321 00:12:33,355 --> 00:12:35,205 Well, great, then, you know. 322 00:12:35,206 --> 00:12:37,041 We let the single best candidate we have 323 00:12:37,043 --> 00:12:38,068 take another job. 324 00:12:38,069 --> 00:12:39,877 All right, what about sex offender guy? 325 00:12:39,879 --> 00:12:41,179 I mean, do we know what he did? 326 00:12:41,181 --> 00:12:42,374 I mean, maybe it wasn't even that bad. 327 00:12:42,375 --> 00:12:44,465 Maybe he just, like, peed in the park or something. 328 00:12:44,467 --> 00:12:46,100 Oh, I... I looked it up. It... 329 00:12:47,787 --> 00:12:49,132 It wasn't that. 330 00:12:51,012 --> 00:12:52,820 As you know, we love the name Parker. 331 00:12:52,875 --> 00:12:54,764 Ugh, love it so much. 332 00:12:55,031 --> 00:12:57,732 And we found out a few fun, interesting facts 333 00:12:57,805 --> 00:13:00,053 that we thought you might want to know. 334 00:13:00,055 --> 00:13:03,390 Did you know that the name Parker literally translates 335 00:13:03,392 --> 00:13:05,141 to "park keeper," 336 00:13:05,143 --> 00:13:08,061 so in other words, a homeless person. 337 00:13:08,063 --> 00:13:09,596 Sleep on the streets. 338 00:13:09,598 --> 00:13:12,148 I don't know that anybody's making that connection. 339 00:13:12,150 --> 00:13:13,950 Not to your face they won't. 340 00:13:14,293 --> 00:13:17,163 The name Parker also brings to mind 341 00:13:17,343 --> 00:13:20,209 the snobby, rich, evil character in an '80s movie. 342 00:13:20,288 --> 00:13:21,875 Hey, nerds. I'm Parker. 343 00:13:21,877 --> 00:13:23,793 And I'm gonna throw you guys in a Dumpster. 344 00:13:23,795 --> 00:13:25,882 - Yeah. - But Mateo, what about 345 00:13:25,953 --> 00:13:27,047 Parker Posey? 346 00:13:27,049 --> 00:13:29,249 Look, Penny, we want you. 347 00:13:29,607 --> 00:13:31,634 You're the only person we want. 348 00:13:32,011 --> 00:13:33,708 Well, that sounds great, but 349 00:13:34,087 --> 00:13:36,825 I already told the plasma donation center I would start Monday. 350 00:13:36,935 --> 00:13:38,058 - What? - Oh, no. 351 00:13:38,060 --> 00:13:39,426 You don't want to do that. Those guys are dicks. 352 00:13:39,428 --> 00:13:41,344 They're never gonna value you the way we do. 353 00:13:41,346 --> 00:13:43,263 - Mm-hmm. - When you're here, 354 00:13:43,265 --> 00:13:44,193 you're family. 355 00:13:44,195 --> 00:13:46,066 - Aww. - Well, that is... 356 00:13:46,068 --> 00:13:49,736 that is Olive Garden, but we are a family. 357 00:13:49,738 --> 00:13:50,937 Come on, Penny. 358 00:13:50,939 --> 00:13:52,939 We know you want to say yes. 359 00:13:52,941 --> 00:13:55,742 ? Oh, I'm workin', workin' workin' workin ? 360 00:13:55,744 --> 00:13:57,660 ? Workin' ? 361 00:13:58,831 --> 00:14:00,747 ? Yes, I'm dancin', dancin' dancin' dancin' ? 362 00:14:00,749 --> 00:14:02,949 ? Dannncing ? 363 00:14:02,951 --> 00:14:05,737 So, this is who you guys hired, huh? 364 00:14:06,678 --> 00:14:07,954 That's an interesting choice. 365 00:14:07,956 --> 00:14:10,039 Oh! Hey, guys. 366 00:14:10,041 --> 00:14:11,257 Uh-oh, she spotted us. 367 00:14:11,259 --> 00:14:14,210 - Who wants to rhumba? - Oh, no. 368 00:14:14,212 --> 00:14:17,013 With coupons, you save $12. 369 00:14:17,519 --> 00:14:19,627 Sorry. Hormonal. 370 00:14:20,051 --> 00:14:22,746 I had a baby two days ago. 371 00:14:24,639 --> 00:14:26,470 The chip-reader's broken. 372 00:14:26,858 --> 00:14:28,164 It's broken. 373 00:14:36,818 --> 00:14:39,119 The flames are burning my eyes! 374 00:14:39,121 --> 00:14:41,145 Well then, don't look at the flame. 375 00:14:42,596 --> 00:14:45,575 I feel like the sparks are coming in through the holes. 376 00:14:45,577 --> 00:14:46,993 Ow! Ow, ow. 377 00:14:46,995 --> 00:14:48,328 Ow. Ow. Ow. 378 00:14:52,884 --> 00:14:54,000 Excuse me. 379 00:14:54,002 --> 00:14:55,218 Coming through. 380 00:14:55,220 --> 00:14:56,719 Chugga-chugga-chugga-chugga 381 00:14:56,721 --> 00:14:57,754 chugga-chugga-chugga-chugga 382 00:14:57,756 --> 00:14:59,005 choo-choo! 383 00:14:59,007 --> 00:15:01,641 Go-back express coming through! 384 00:15:01,643 --> 00:15:03,176 I find her extremely annoying, 385 00:15:03,178 --> 00:15:04,978 but that is what a train sounds like. 386 00:15:04,980 --> 00:15:06,563 Oddly realistic. 387 00:15:06,565 --> 00:15:08,515 Excuse me, ah, are you guys still doing interviews 388 00:15:08,517 --> 00:15:09,983 for seasonal help? 389 00:15:09,985 --> 00:15:12,268 Unfortunately, the last spot has been filled. 390 00:15:12,269 --> 00:15:13,402 Ah! Sucks. 391 00:15:13,491 --> 00:15:16,554 Got caught up in a flame war with some guy on "Fortnite." 392 00:15:16,585 --> 00:15:18,491 Totally lost track of time. 393 00:15:18,493 --> 00:15:19,692 I know what that's like. 394 00:15:19,694 --> 00:15:21,277 Well, here's my resume. 395 00:15:21,329 --> 00:15:24,837 Ignore the useless philosophy degree. 396 00:15:24,892 --> 00:15:27,280 I guess you can keep it on file 397 00:15:27,320 --> 00:15:29,919 or throw it away as soon as I walk out of here. 398 00:15:30,178 --> 00:15:31,409 I'll never know. 399 00:15:32,321 --> 00:15:34,983 Uh, hey, there... there's nothing on here 400 00:15:34,984 --> 00:15:37,245 I should know about, like a swastika tattoo 401 00:15:37,246 --> 00:15:38,488 or something, right? 402 00:15:39,338 --> 00:15:41,097 - No. - Good. 403 00:15:41,099 --> 00:15:42,966 That's perfect. Yeah, you're cool, dude. 404 00:15:42,968 --> 00:15:44,601 Thanks, guys. I, um... 405 00:15:44,603 --> 00:15:46,886 feel like your bar is a little bit low, 406 00:15:46,888 --> 00:15:49,022 but uh, feels really nice to hear. 407 00:15:49,024 --> 00:15:51,641 If you need anyone, just give me a call. 408 00:15:51,643 --> 00:15:53,610 Beep. Beep. Beep. 409 00:15:53,612 --> 00:15:55,278 Go back. Pick up. 410 00:15:55,280 --> 00:15:58,448 Any go-backs for robot truck? 411 00:15:58,450 --> 00:15:59,899 No. 412 00:15:59,901 --> 00:16:01,784 Beep. Beep. Beep. 413 00:16:01,786 --> 00:16:03,069 Beep. Beep. Beep. 414 00:16:03,071 --> 00:16:05,127 - I hate her. - She's the worst. 415 00:16:06,065 --> 00:16:09,659 I hate to complain, but that machine is so noisy. 416 00:16:10,122 --> 00:16:12,412 I'll feel like I'm praying on the wings of an airplane. 417 00:16:12,974 --> 00:16:15,646 Well, there's no volume button, so... 418 00:16:16,418 --> 00:16:17,917 It's just that when I make my... 419 00:16:17,919 --> 00:16:19,886 This is the sound it makes, Sayid! 420 00:16:19,888 --> 00:16:22,278 Okay. Okay. 421 00:16:22,891 --> 00:16:24,257 You're firing me? 422 00:16:24,259 --> 00:16:26,559 But I already turned down the other job. 423 00:16:26,561 --> 00:16:28,177 You said we were a family. 424 00:16:28,179 --> 00:16:30,096 Yeah, we did, and we are, 425 00:16:30,105 --> 00:16:32,774 but families split up. Happens all the time. 426 00:16:33,092 --> 00:16:35,209 And sometimes dads burn down their homes 427 00:16:35,211 --> 00:16:37,094 'cause they can't handle the pressure. 428 00:16:37,096 --> 00:16:38,143 I mean, that's... 429 00:16:38,472 --> 00:16:39,387 that's sad. 430 00:16:39,577 --> 00:16:41,477 - Wow. - There you go. 431 00:16:43,050 --> 00:16:44,049 I... 432 00:16:44,270 --> 00:16:45,567 - Just... - Just... 433 00:16:46,105 --> 00:16:47,855 - Just... - Don't do this, Penny. 434 00:16:47,857 --> 00:16:49,976 No, I don't know what that cry means, Adam. 435 00:16:49,977 --> 00:16:51,969 No, do not put him on the phone. 436 00:16:52,312 --> 00:16:53,704 Parker, put your father on the ph... 437 00:16:53,705 --> 00:16:54,767 You don't know what that means. 438 00:16:54,768 --> 00:16:56,810 Mommy loves you. I'll see you soon. Bye. 439 00:16:56,811 --> 00:16:58,075 Hey. Amy? 440 00:16:58,734 --> 00:16:59,892 Yeah. 441 00:16:59,893 --> 00:17:02,502 - You okay? - No, Glenn. I'm not okay. 442 00:17:02,503 --> 00:17:04,382 I am dealing with a lot today. 443 00:17:04,383 --> 00:17:07,429 I know, you are, and I felt terrible about it, 444 00:17:08,043 --> 00:17:09,492 so I got you a pick-me-up. 445 00:17:09,493 --> 00:17:11,254 It's a collection of bath bombs. 446 00:17:12,131 --> 00:17:14,525 Sorry, you think that a bath bomb 447 00:17:14,791 --> 00:17:17,012 is the answer to all of my problems? 448 00:17:17,920 --> 00:17:19,487 It's not a real bomb, and... 449 00:17:19,488 --> 00:17:20,620 Just kill yourself! 450 00:17:21,590 --> 00:17:22,129 What? 451 00:17:22,130 --> 00:17:23,721 Kill yourself! 452 00:17:24,190 --> 00:17:26,877 - Amy... - No, you don't get to talk right now! 453 00:17:26,878 --> 00:17:28,929 I am so tired! 454 00:17:28,931 --> 00:17:32,708 I have slept 90 minutes in three days. 455 00:17:32,709 --> 00:17:36,507 The lining of my uterus is coming out in clumps. 456 00:17:36,873 --> 00:17:39,150 I have hemorrhoids so big 457 00:17:39,151 --> 00:17:42,717 that my doctor looked at my [bleep] and said "Whoa!" 458 00:17:43,045 --> 00:17:44,506 Have you ever had a doctor 459 00:17:44,507 --> 00:17:46,679 look at your [bleep] and say that? 460 00:17:47,127 --> 00:17:47,759 No. 461 00:17:47,760 --> 00:17:50,200 I am wearing frozen diapers 462 00:17:50,202 --> 00:17:52,439 so that my [bleep] doesn't fall out. 463 00:17:52,440 --> 00:17:54,542 - Okay?! - I know, I was just... 464 00:17:54,543 --> 00:17:56,383 Why haven't you killed yourself?! 465 00:17:57,380 --> 00:17:58,673 Okay, well, um... 466 00:17:59,962 --> 00:18:03,613 I am gonna do some paperwork in my car. 467 00:18:07,997 --> 00:18:09,199 - Okay. - Yeah? 468 00:18:09,200 --> 00:18:09,907 Yeah. 469 00:18:13,677 --> 00:18:16,214 Are you filming? Delete that. 470 00:18:16,215 --> 00:18:18,061 Delete that! 471 00:18:21,253 --> 00:18:24,123 I probably shouldn't have told Glenn to kill himself. 472 00:18:25,074 --> 00:18:26,300 Probably not. 473 00:18:26,918 --> 00:18:28,377 It's not like I thought this was gonna be easy. 474 00:18:28,378 --> 00:18:30,973 I just didn't think it was gonna be this hard. 475 00:18:30,974 --> 00:18:35,274 I'm on day two and I have nothing left to give. 476 00:18:38,998 --> 00:18:41,430 Aren't you gonna tell me some inspiring story 477 00:18:41,431 --> 00:18:43,396 about how you made it through Shakespeare camp 478 00:18:43,397 --> 00:18:45,119 without a dialect coach or something? 479 00:18:45,120 --> 00:18:47,533 We were a scrappy, rag-tag group 480 00:18:47,534 --> 00:18:49,542 but in the end, we really tamed that shrew. 481 00:18:49,543 --> 00:18:50,464 There it is. 482 00:18:52,177 --> 00:18:54,520 Honestly, I don't really have any advice. 483 00:18:55,192 --> 00:18:58,348 I've never done anything remotely as hard 484 00:18:58,350 --> 00:18:59,660 as what you're doing. 485 00:19:00,018 --> 00:19:02,153 I'm sorry if that doesn't make you feel any better. 486 00:19:02,154 --> 00:19:04,280 Weirdly it kind of does. 487 00:19:05,491 --> 00:19:08,102 Hey, Amy, it's about that time. 488 00:19:09,244 --> 00:19:11,098 Mm. He's not wrong. 489 00:19:11,904 --> 00:19:14,187 He prays, I pump. It's a thing. 490 00:19:14,833 --> 00:19:16,867 It's not a thing. Whose thing is that? 491 00:19:16,869 --> 00:19:18,585 Now, if you're looking for a lighter tea, 492 00:19:18,587 --> 00:19:20,787 you might want to go the oolong route. 493 00:19:20,789 --> 00:19:22,855 Yup, there... yup, no, you're on it. 494 00:19:22,856 --> 00:19:24,674 You're on it. You're on it. 495 00:19:24,676 --> 00:19:26,426 But of course, if you're looking for something 496 00:19:26,428 --> 00:19:27,761 a little bit more intense, 497 00:19:27,763 --> 00:19:29,679 may I suggest the Earl Grey? 498 00:19:29,681 --> 00:19:33,183 Nope, upper shelf. Top shelf. Yup, there it is. Yeah. 499 00:19:33,185 --> 00:19:34,601 Now, actually, you're gonna want to 500 00:19:34,603 --> 00:19:35,568 get one of the ones from the back. 501 00:19:35,569 --> 00:19:37,443 The back tea is always fresher. 502 00:19:37,615 --> 00:19:38,941 That's a little tip for you. 503 00:19:38,942 --> 00:19:40,365 We re-stocked the back. 504 00:19:40,366 --> 00:19:42,041 Now, give that a smell. 505 00:19:42,042 --> 00:19:43,709 You're gonna smell the bergamot 506 00:19:43,710 --> 00:19:45,979 that's just risen to the top of the box. 507 00:19:45,981 --> 00:19:48,089 I mean, that is delicious. 508 00:19:50,083 --> 00:19:51,183 Hey, Glenn. 509 00:19:51,218 --> 00:19:53,252 I just want to apologize. 510 00:19:53,286 --> 00:19:56,538 I'm sorry. I should not have unloaded on you like that. 511 00:19:56,539 --> 00:19:57,746 That wasn't fair. 512 00:19:57,747 --> 00:20:01,202 I can't believe that I ever thought a bath bomb 513 00:20:01,209 --> 00:20:02,847 would solve all your problems. 514 00:20:02,848 --> 00:20:05,315 I mean, a bath bomb. 515 00:20:05,316 --> 00:20:08,085 - I was so far off. - Yeah. 516 00:20:08,086 --> 00:20:11,098 - You were. - So I got you a puppy. 517 00:20:11,099 --> 00:20:13,379 What? Wh-how... 518 00:20:13,774 --> 00:20:14,866 Glenn, I... 519 00:20:14,867 --> 00:20:16,275 - Aww. - Can't... 520 00:20:16,309 --> 00:20:18,527 I know. There are no words. 521 00:20:19,646 --> 00:20:20,591 Thank you. 522 00:20:21,314 --> 00:20:23,282 You're welcome. 523 00:20:24,918 --> 00:20:26,652 That's exactly what I need. 524 00:20:26,686 --> 00:20:27,871 I know. 525 00:20:31,992 --> 00:20:34,305 Bye, whatever your name's gonna be. 526 00:20:34,928 --> 00:20:35,978 Oh, look at that. 527 00:20:35,979 --> 00:20:37,296 Putting the products back on the shelf 528 00:20:37,330 --> 00:20:38,631 without punching or kicking them. 529 00:20:38,665 --> 00:20:40,204 You're way ahead of the other seasonals. 530 00:20:40,205 --> 00:20:42,354 Thank you, thank you. My parents will be so proud. 531 00:20:42,355 --> 00:20:44,136 Yeah. 532 00:20:44,171 --> 00:20:46,238 You guys mind if I take five? Just gotta pee. 533 00:20:46,273 --> 00:20:48,107 - Oh, yeah, go for it. - See you soon, man. 534 00:20:48,141 --> 00:20:49,190 Thanks. 535 00:20:49,191 --> 00:20:50,910 - I like him. - I really like him. 536 00:20:50,944 --> 00:20:52,812 You know what? It just goes to show 537 00:20:52,846 --> 00:20:55,114 you put in the work, you kiss a bunch of frogs, 538 00:20:55,148 --> 00:20:57,555 eventually you're gonna find your prince. 539 00:20:57,556 --> 00:20:59,155 Lonnie is our prince. 540 00:20:59,156 --> 00:21:01,480 Yeah. You know what? I was gonna go needle in a haystack, 541 00:21:01,481 --> 00:21:02,855 but I'm in such a good mood, 542 00:21:02,889 --> 00:21:04,720 I'll go along with your metaphor. 543 00:21:09,029 --> 00:21:11,016 Lonnie's urinating on the floor. 544 00:21:11,017 --> 00:21:13,007 Yeah, that is what's happening. 545 00:21:13,285 --> 00:21:16,942 Whew. All right. 546 00:21:16,943 --> 00:21:20,109 Synced and corrected by hawken45 for www.addic7ed.com 37944

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