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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:17,578 Well, thanks... thanks for coming over. 2 00:00:17,617 --> 00:00:19,675 - Ah, you know, please. - You've been... 3 00:00:19,718 --> 00:00:22,050 You look fantastic. Look at you. 4 00:00:22,087 --> 00:00:23,952 - Really?! - You never looked better in your life. 5 00:00:23,989 --> 00:00:26,081 - Oh, thank you. - You're a lucky man, 6 00:00:26,124 --> 00:00:27,455 you're a blessed man. 7 00:00:27,492 --> 00:00:30,290 Well, you know, I took, uh... 8 00:00:30,328 --> 00:00:32,592 I took care of myself. I was never an alcoholic 9 00:00:32,630 --> 00:00:34,392 or a drug addict. 10 00:00:34,431 --> 00:00:37,491 Never slept with a lot strange women. Although I wanted to, 11 00:00:37,534 --> 00:00:40,332 they wouldn't... You know... 12 00:00:40,370 --> 00:00:42,394 I need a kidney, man. 13 00:00:42,438 --> 00:00:45,430 Where am I gonna find someone who loves me enough just to give me a kidney? 14 00:00:45,474 --> 00:00:46,805 Come on, you took the test. 15 00:00:46,842 --> 00:00:49,332 You're a match. Are you gonna give me the kidney or not? 16 00:00:49,377 --> 00:00:51,140 - I'm struggling. - Well, what's wrong with Louis Lewis? 17 00:00:51,179 --> 00:00:52,908 - I mean, he's... he's in this... - Oh, please. 18 00:00:52,947 --> 00:00:55,278 Coma in the hospital. How long can he go on? 19 00:00:55,315 --> 00:00:57,613 - And he's family. - He's in a coma. 20 00:00:57,651 --> 00:00:59,846 Comas are unpredictable for Christ's sake. 21 00:00:59,887 --> 00:01:01,821 Who the hell fucking knows? 22 00:01:01,855 --> 00:01:03,879 Family. Fuck family. 23 00:01:03,923 --> 00:01:07,120 You know, and you know what's pissing me off? I'm so low on that list, 24 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:10,424 that kidney transplant list. It's so unfair. 25 00:01:10,462 --> 00:01:12,794 Look at the Mick. I mean, the Mick... I love the guy, 26 00:01:12,831 --> 00:01:15,061 we were friends. Mantle got his liver just like that... 27 00:01:15,100 --> 00:01:16,964 - boom. - Yeah. Well, 28 00:01:17,001 --> 00:01:18,969 if you were a little bigger celebrity, 29 00:01:19,003 --> 00:01:21,597 you'd be on the top of the list too. 30 00:01:21,639 --> 00:01:24,835 Jesus Christ. By the way, that... see that ball? 31 00:01:24,874 --> 00:01:27,741 That's the 500th home run 32 00:01:27,777 --> 00:01:28,971 - that the Mick hit. - Really? 33 00:01:29,012 --> 00:01:31,105 Yeah, I'm leaving it... it's in my will. It's yours. 34 00:01:31,147 --> 00:01:32,704 - No kidding. - Yeah. 35 00:01:32,748 --> 00:01:34,215 - It's worth about 20 grand. - What? 36 00:01:34,249 --> 00:01:36,877 And you get the money too. I'm giving you the bread and the ball. 37 00:01:38,654 --> 00:01:39,915 Hey. 38 00:01:39,954 --> 00:01:42,218 Hey, remember in camp, when you used to do... 39 00:01:42,256 --> 00:01:44,588 the Mick... do the Mick rounding the bases. 40 00:01:44,625 --> 00:01:46,455 Yeah. 41 00:01:46,493 --> 00:01:48,393 - That's Mickey's run. Yep. - Huh? 42 00:01:48,428 --> 00:01:49,759 - You look great. - Mickey Mantle. 43 00:01:49,796 --> 00:01:51,423 Yeah, that's Mantle. 44 00:01:51,465 --> 00:01:54,331 - Well, I'm gonna take off. - When are you coming back? 45 00:01:54,366 --> 00:01:55,856 - Yeah, I'll come back. - Soon? 46 00:01:55,901 --> 00:01:57,391 Yeah. 47 00:01:57,436 --> 00:02:00,166 And let me ask you a question: You like this sweater? 48 00:02:00,206 --> 00:02:01,900 - How's it look? - You know, 49 00:02:01,940 --> 00:02:04,135 if you're doing an Andy Williams summer show. 50 00:02:04,175 --> 00:02:06,735 See, you still got your sense of humor. 51 00:02:06,778 --> 00:02:10,474 - You still got it. - I love you, Larry. I really love you. 52 00:02:10,514 --> 00:02:13,108 And if my cousin stays in that coma, 53 00:02:13,150 --> 00:02:15,243 I'm depending on you. 54 00:02:16,552 --> 00:02:17,951 - Hi. - Hi. 55 00:02:17,987 --> 00:02:21,423 - I'm Lisa, his nurse. - Oh, I'm Larry. 56 00:02:21,457 --> 00:02:24,357 It was nice of him to give you his ball like that. 57 00:02:24,392 --> 00:02:26,917 - The ball, yeah... that's was very nice. - It was very good. 58 00:02:26,962 --> 00:02:30,260 - Yeah. - Hey, I wanted to tell you, you know? 59 00:02:30,297 --> 00:02:33,698 We have a mutual acquaintance. I know Jeff. 60 00:02:33,734 --> 00:02:36,601 - You know Jeff? - I do. Yeah yeah. 61 00:02:36,637 --> 00:02:38,399 We actually dated a little bit. 62 00:02:38,438 --> 00:02:40,497 - Really?! - Yeah, not too long. But uh... 63 00:02:40,540 --> 00:02:42,940 Wow. So did you have a good time with him? 64 00:02:42,976 --> 00:02:45,034 Well, until things got, you know, intimate, 65 00:02:45,077 --> 00:02:46,977 it was fun. You know, he's... 66 00:02:47,012 --> 00:02:49,947 He's kind of a "slam, bam, thank you, ma'am" kind of guy, right? 67 00:02:49,982 --> 00:02:51,472 - No, not really at all. - No? 68 00:02:51,517 --> 00:02:52,881 - Oh! - No. No slamming, no bamming. 69 00:02:52,917 --> 00:02:55,750 No thanking the ma'am. 70 00:02:55,786 --> 00:02:57,651 He's was a little... it was short lived, 71 00:02:57,688 --> 00:03:00,087 was the problem. 72 00:03:00,123 --> 00:03:03,615 He was like that. 73 00:03:03,660 --> 00:03:06,322 I mean, it was dark, but honest to God 74 00:03:06,362 --> 00:03:08,421 it was like that. 75 00:03:08,464 --> 00:03:10,295 What, are you kidding? 76 00:03:10,332 --> 00:03:12,300 Uh, no, I'm not kidding. 77 00:03:12,334 --> 00:03:15,962 - Jeff?! - Yeah, very small, very small. 78 00:03:16,004 --> 00:03:17,972 - It was like a peanut. That little... - All right. 79 00:03:18,006 --> 00:03:20,770 This is a very... you know, way too much information here, okay? 80 00:03:20,808 --> 00:03:22,638 I thought you knew... would've known that. 81 00:03:22,676 --> 00:03:24,473 - How can I know such a thing? - I just would think 82 00:03:24,511 --> 00:03:26,342 that that's something that friends... 83 00:03:26,380 --> 00:03:28,143 men would talk about. 84 00:03:28,182 --> 00:03:30,741 - No, nobody ever talks about that. - Really? 85 00:03:30,783 --> 00:03:32,546 - No. - Sorry about that. 86 00:03:32,585 --> 00:03:35,247 I don't even know what to say to you, but... 87 00:03:35,288 --> 00:03:38,415 - I'll see you around. - Yeah yeah. 88 00:03:38,456 --> 00:03:40,822 - Yeah. - Huh. 89 00:03:46,964 --> 00:03:49,728 Comas are very unpredictable. 90 00:03:49,767 --> 00:03:52,758 Could wake up in five seconds, five minutes, 91 00:03:52,802 --> 00:03:55,202 five years! You don't know. You just don't know. 92 00:03:55,238 --> 00:03:57,967 They're unpredictable. 93 00:03:58,006 --> 00:04:01,806 - Oh! Didn't even tell you! - What? 94 00:04:01,843 --> 00:04:04,505 Ran into somebody you went out with. 95 00:04:04,546 --> 00:04:07,446 - Oh. - She's Lewis's nurse. 96 00:04:07,481 --> 00:04:09,915 - Lisa Thompson? - Yeah. You had a little uh... 97 00:04:09,951 --> 00:04:12,316 - A little thing. Yeah. - A little thing with her, didn't you? 98 00:04:12,352 --> 00:04:14,183 - Yeah yeah yeah. - Hmm... 99 00:04:14,221 --> 00:04:16,587 - Didn't work out. - Yeah. 100 00:04:17,757 --> 00:04:20,156 She told me you had... 101 00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:23,355 - uh... - What? 102 00:04:25,764 --> 00:04:28,493 No no no. 103 00:04:28,533 --> 00:04:30,797 - Big vagina?! - Gigantic vagina! 104 00:04:30,835 --> 00:04:33,895 - What?! - Biggest vagina known to man! 105 00:04:33,937 --> 00:04:35,905 - Huge! - You're kidding. 106 00:04:35,939 --> 00:04:40,103 - Are you telling me the truth? - It's gigantic. Gigantic 107 00:04:40,143 --> 00:04:42,042 So why is she going around making this accusation? 108 00:04:42,078 --> 00:04:43,943 Because maybe she's afraid that you'll find out 109 00:04:43,980 --> 00:04:45,948 she has a big vagina. Why would would she even do that? 110 00:04:45,982 --> 00:04:47,916 - I don't even know. - Nipping it in the bud? 111 00:04:47,950 --> 00:04:50,383 How dare she? I'll tell you what. 112 00:04:50,418 --> 00:04:52,943 I bet you there's a ton of guys out there 113 00:04:52,988 --> 00:04:54,888 who've been labeled with "small penis." 114 00:04:54,923 --> 00:04:56,753 - I bet you 50%... - It's the vagina, isn't it? 115 00:04:56,790 --> 00:04:59,088 - And it's the big vagina. - Yeah. Think of it biologically... 116 00:04:59,126 --> 00:05:02,857 why should there be as many big vaginas as there are small penises, right? 117 00:05:02,896 --> 00:05:05,261 These big vagina ladies are getting away with murder. 118 00:05:05,298 --> 00:05:07,664 Something should be done. I don't know what can be done, 119 00:05:07,700 --> 00:05:09,691 but something should be done. Either... 120 00:05:09,736 --> 00:05:12,203 We're a hell of lot more discrete than they are, right? 121 00:05:12,237 --> 00:05:14,364 - They can't do this enough, can they? - Oh, they love it, they love it. 122 00:05:14,406 --> 00:05:16,431 They love this thing. Well, you know what? 123 00:05:16,475 --> 00:05:18,465 This is me from now on. 124 00:05:19,710 --> 00:05:21,905 Yeah. 125 00:05:21,946 --> 00:05:23,914 Hello, Doctor. 126 00:05:23,948 --> 00:05:26,313 Oh. Hi, Doctor. 127 00:05:28,318 --> 00:05:31,879 - How's he doing? - You know how's he doing. 128 00:05:31,921 --> 00:05:34,753 I'm on to you, Mr. David. 129 00:05:34,790 --> 00:05:37,486 - Excuse me. - The frequent visits, 130 00:05:37,526 --> 00:05:39,494 the questions about organs, come on. 131 00:05:39,528 --> 00:05:42,792 I'm not crazy. I'm chief of staff here. I know what's going on. 132 00:05:42,830 --> 00:05:45,697 What's going on? 133 00:05:45,733 --> 00:05:48,929 I think you've been waiting for this man to die 134 00:05:48,969 --> 00:05:52,803 so you can get one of his organs, preferably his kidney, 135 00:05:52,839 --> 00:05:55,204 so you won't have to give up one, 136 00:05:55,241 --> 00:05:57,209 so that Mr. Lewis can get it. 137 00:05:57,243 --> 00:05:59,234 What kind of person would do something like that? 138 00:05:59,278 --> 00:06:01,802 I think you know what kind of person would do that, Mr. David. 139 00:06:01,846 --> 00:06:03,973 - A kind of person like me?! - Yes. 140 00:06:07,585 --> 00:06:10,052 That's pretty good... pretty good work. 141 00:06:10,087 --> 00:06:12,851 - Thank you, thank you. - He got me. 142 00:06:14,525 --> 00:06:16,492 Good job, Doctor. I think you got me. 143 00:06:16,526 --> 00:06:19,120 I got ya. 144 00:06:21,130 --> 00:06:24,326 By the way, my in-laws can't go skiing, 145 00:06:24,366 --> 00:06:27,597 so I've got an opening for you and Cheryl if you want it. 146 00:06:27,636 --> 00:06:29,604 - Why would I go skiing? - Come on. 147 00:06:29,638 --> 00:06:32,800 No, it's a big schlep. Hey... 148 00:06:34,542 --> 00:06:37,306 isn't that George Lopez? 149 00:06:37,345 --> 00:06:40,245 - He had a kidney transplant. - Right. Right right right right. 150 00:06:41,915 --> 00:06:44,076 - Huh? - Get some inside information? 151 00:06:47,586 --> 00:06:49,645 - Hey, George. - How're you doing? 152 00:06:49,688 --> 00:06:51,315 - Good. How are you? - Good, brother. 153 00:06:51,357 --> 00:06:53,256 - This is Jeff Greene, my manager. - How are you? 154 00:06:53,291 --> 00:06:54,451 Hey, Jeff. George Lopez. 155 00:06:54,492 --> 00:06:56,016 - Pleasure. - How's it going? 156 00:06:56,060 --> 00:06:58,460 Good. Feel great, better than I have ever in my life. 157 00:06:58,496 --> 00:06:59,793 - Really? - Yeah. 158 00:06:59,831 --> 00:07:01,764 I had a kidney transplant. My wife gave it to me. 159 00:07:01,798 --> 00:07:03,789 Changed my whole life, man. I mean, without it, 160 00:07:03,834 --> 00:07:05,802 I don't even know if I'd be alive, to tell you the truth. 161 00:07:05,836 --> 00:07:07,894 You know, uh, Richard Lewis needs one. 162 00:07:07,937 --> 00:07:10,269 - I didn't know that. Poor Richard. - Yeah, yeah. 163 00:07:10,306 --> 00:07:12,240 Wow. Well, he's got to go to his family or his friends. 164 00:07:12,274 --> 00:07:13,639 Somebody's gotta step up. 165 00:07:13,676 --> 00:07:15,700 - Oh, yeah yeah yeah yeah. - Oh, yeah yeah yeah. 166 00:07:15,744 --> 00:07:18,008 - That's true. - Like a five-year waiting list. 167 00:07:18,046 --> 00:07:21,015 So what do you think he should do? 'Cause he's on the bottom of the list. 168 00:07:21,049 --> 00:07:23,312 Well, if you're the bottom of the list, you're fucked. 169 00:07:23,350 --> 00:07:26,615 - Wow. - But you know what? 170 00:07:29,055 --> 00:07:32,752 Like, I've heard that the guy who's the head of the kidney consortium 171 00:07:32,792 --> 00:07:35,124 - can be gotten to. - Really? 172 00:07:35,161 --> 00:07:38,061 Mm-hmm. Yeah, I mean, he really takes care of his friends. 173 00:07:38,096 --> 00:07:41,759 Buddy up to him. Kiss his ass. Who knows? 174 00:07:41,800 --> 00:07:43,529 Probably move Richard up the list. 175 00:07:43,568 --> 00:07:45,330 - Really? - Wow. 176 00:07:45,369 --> 00:07:47,200 - All right, I got to get blood drawn. - Thanks, George. 177 00:07:47,238 --> 00:07:49,729 - Nice meeting you. Take care, dude. - Nice meeting you, George. 178 00:07:49,774 --> 00:07:51,673 - Take care. - Oh, hey, George. What's his name? 179 00:07:51,708 --> 00:07:54,074 Ben Heineman. 180 00:07:54,110 --> 00:07:57,477 - With an E or a Y? - With an E. 181 00:08:00,883 --> 00:08:02,407 Hey, Mr. Jones. 182 00:08:02,451 --> 00:08:05,284 There's actually something else you could do for me too. 183 00:08:05,320 --> 00:08:07,287 - Really? - It's unrelated to the adoption. 184 00:08:07,321 --> 00:08:09,551 I need some information about a Ben Heineman. 185 00:08:09,590 --> 00:08:11,057 "Ben Heineman." 186 00:08:11,092 --> 00:08:13,753 - He's head of the kidney consortium. - Okay. 187 00:08:13,794 --> 00:08:16,729 Anything you can find out about his guy would be fantastic... 188 00:08:16,763 --> 00:08:19,459 - H-E-l-N-E-M-A-N. - Yeah, I got it. 189 00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:21,796 Well, "Heineman" could be spelled a couple different ways. 190 00:08:21,834 --> 00:08:23,301 - Hi. - Hey. 191 00:08:23,335 --> 00:08:24,802 - Oh, this is my wife. - I'm Cheryl. 192 00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:26,566 This is Omar Jones, private investigator. 193 00:08:26,605 --> 00:08:28,196 Oh, right. 194 00:08:28,239 --> 00:08:29,570 He's working on the whole adoption thing. 195 00:08:29,607 --> 00:08:31,632 - Right. - I'm making some great headway also. 196 00:08:31,676 --> 00:08:33,837 - Oh, fantastic. - Okay, couple of weeks, 197 00:08:33,878 --> 00:08:35,674 you should know something very definitive. 198 00:08:35,712 --> 00:08:37,771 - Great, okay. - Enjoy your day. 199 00:08:37,815 --> 00:08:39,442 - Thank you. You too. - Thank you. 200 00:08:39,483 --> 00:08:41,678 - You're welcome. - I, uh... 201 00:08:41,718 --> 00:08:43,241 I got you something. 202 00:08:43,286 --> 00:08:46,778 - Wow! New jacket? - It's nice, right? Yeah. 203 00:08:46,823 --> 00:08:50,189 - Yes, I needed this. - You're gonna need it when we go skiing 204 00:08:50,225 --> 00:08:52,090 - with Susie and Jeff. - Skiing? Are you kidding? 205 00:08:52,127 --> 00:08:53,719 Come on, that's out. I nixed that. 206 00:08:53,762 --> 00:08:55,696 Look, you don't have to ski. 207 00:08:55,730 --> 00:08:57,629 You can sit inside and enjoy the snow. 208 00:08:57,665 --> 00:08:59,223 I'm not going up to that lodge. Come on, man. 209 00:08:59,266 --> 00:09:01,996 - Why? - Too much schlepping. I'm not... 210 00:09:02,036 --> 00:09:04,765 He left something. What is this? 211 00:09:07,941 --> 00:09:10,739 "Edible Undies"? 212 00:09:10,777 --> 00:09:13,336 Oh, dear. 213 00:09:30,393 --> 00:09:33,520 Okay, Big Yankee fan. He's an orthodox Jew. 214 00:09:33,562 --> 00:09:35,462 All right, what else you got? 215 00:09:35,498 --> 00:09:38,023 Drives a gold Cadillac. 216 00:09:38,067 --> 00:09:41,763 License plate number 2-F-A-N-3-2-1. 217 00:09:41,803 --> 00:09:44,169 Okay, thank you. 218 00:09:45,907 --> 00:09:47,703 - Hey. - Hey. 219 00:09:47,741 --> 00:09:50,073 So Omar Jones 220 00:09:50,110 --> 00:09:51,634 - the private investigator? - Yeah? 221 00:09:51,678 --> 00:09:54,647 He got me information about the head of the kidney consortium. 222 00:09:54,681 --> 00:09:56,238 - Guess what? - What? 223 00:09:56,282 --> 00:09:58,341 - He's an orthodox Jew. - You're kidding. 224 00:09:58,384 --> 00:10:01,376 No. So... 225 00:10:01,420 --> 00:10:03,353 what needs to be done here is 226 00:10:03,388 --> 00:10:06,653 that I need to somehow befriend this guy. 227 00:10:06,691 --> 00:10:10,353 I need to get close to him quickly. 228 00:10:10,394 --> 00:10:12,794 - Right? - Yeah. How're you gonna do that? 229 00:10:12,830 --> 00:10:15,822 - If I could save his life or something. - Uh-huh. 230 00:10:15,866 --> 00:10:18,060 You know, like... bad example, okay? Not this. 231 00:10:18,101 --> 00:10:20,592 You know, you pushed him off a building. 232 00:10:20,637 --> 00:10:22,332 - I push him off the building. - And I saved him. 233 00:10:22,372 --> 00:10:24,236 - And you would catch him. - And I catch him. 234 00:10:24,273 --> 00:10:26,332 - Yeah? - He would be indebted to me for life. 235 00:10:26,375 --> 00:10:28,002 - Yeah. - He would do anything I asked him, 236 00:10:28,043 --> 00:10:30,238 like put my friend on the top of the kidney list. 237 00:10:30,279 --> 00:10:32,838 And at no point, he says to you, "Hey, what about the fat guy 238 00:10:32,880 --> 00:10:35,508 that just threw me off the roof?" That would never come up. 239 00:10:35,550 --> 00:10:37,780 No. I said it's bad version. You know, bad version. 240 00:10:37,818 --> 00:10:40,285 - Really bad version. - But I need to save his life. 241 00:10:40,320 --> 00:10:42,220 - Something like that. - Yeah yeah. 242 00:10:42,255 --> 00:10:45,315 Yeah yeah yeah yeah. 243 00:10:45,358 --> 00:10:48,155 Well... 244 00:10:50,829 --> 00:10:53,263 - this isn't bad. - What? 245 00:11:01,805 --> 00:11:03,397 - That's it. - The Cadillac? 246 00:11:03,440 --> 00:11:04,998 Gold... the gold Cadillac. See it? 247 00:11:05,042 --> 00:11:08,875 - Uh-huh. - Go check the license. 248 00:11:08,911 --> 00:11:10,902 Yeah, that's it. 249 00:11:13,482 --> 00:11:15,415 Ready? 250 00:11:15,450 --> 00:11:16,974 Yeah, as ready as I'm gonna be. 251 00:11:17,018 --> 00:11:18,815 Whenever you want, go ahead. 252 00:11:18,853 --> 00:11:21,549 - This is crazy. Let's go. - All right. 253 00:11:23,257 --> 00:11:26,317 - Oh. - All right. Look... 254 00:11:33,166 --> 00:11:36,226 - It's like you didn't even hit it. - Let's try it again. 255 00:11:36,269 --> 00:11:38,293 You try it again. I don't want whiplash. 256 00:11:38,337 --> 00:11:41,795 No. You do it. 257 00:11:41,840 --> 00:11:43,899 - Keep a lookout. - I'm keeping a lookout. 258 00:11:49,046 --> 00:11:51,708 - Anybody coming? - No, we're fine. 259 00:12:00,990 --> 00:12:03,550 Oh my God. 260 00:12:03,592 --> 00:12:06,424 Here, come on. Be careful. 261 00:12:08,229 --> 00:12:10,129 Oh my God. 262 00:12:10,164 --> 00:12:12,826 Are you all right? 263 00:12:12,867 --> 00:12:15,232 - Are you okay? - Yeah, I think I'm okay. 264 00:12:15,268 --> 00:12:18,135 Holy shit, it's all over your glasses, your whole face. 265 00:12:18,171 --> 00:12:20,662 Oh my God. 266 00:12:20,707 --> 00:12:22,799 - Oh, there. You did it. - It worked. 267 00:12:22,842 --> 00:12:24,867 Yes. 268 00:12:26,912 --> 00:12:29,641 All right, good. Let's get out of here. Come on. 269 00:12:42,226 --> 00:12:43,590 - Mr... - Mr. David? 270 00:12:43,626 --> 00:12:46,595 - Mr. Heineman. - How are you, sir? 271 00:12:46,629 --> 00:12:49,598 What a great great pleasure to meet you. 272 00:12:49,632 --> 00:12:51,292 Well, it's nice to meet you. 273 00:12:51,333 --> 00:12:53,699 - Sit down, please. - Thank you. 274 00:12:53,735 --> 00:12:56,863 - So? - I'm sorry I'm a little late, 275 00:12:56,905 --> 00:12:58,963 - uh, you know... - It's not a big problem. 276 00:12:59,006 --> 00:13:00,906 Yeah. 277 00:13:04,944 --> 00:13:08,277 What a mitzvah it was for you to leave that note on my car. 278 00:13:08,314 --> 00:13:10,646 Well, how could I do anything less that that? 279 00:13:10,684 --> 00:13:13,743 I'd have to be a sociopath to hit somebody's car 280 00:13:13,786 --> 00:13:16,914 and then, and then go away into the night as if nothing happened. 281 00:13:16,955 --> 00:13:19,923 - Thank you, thank you. - What happened, 282 00:13:19,957 --> 00:13:21,925 I was listening to Jewish radio 283 00:13:21,959 --> 00:13:23,927 and they were talking about Israel 284 00:13:23,961 --> 00:13:26,895 and I got so worked up I lost control of my car. 285 00:13:26,930 --> 00:13:28,761 - May I offer you some lunch? - Please. 286 00:13:28,799 --> 00:13:31,131 Morty, menus, please. 287 00:13:31,168 --> 00:13:33,102 It's kosher, you know that. 288 00:13:33,136 --> 00:13:35,797 Oh. Let's see, wait a second. 289 00:13:35,838 --> 00:13:38,329 Hello? 290 00:13:38,374 --> 00:13:42,469 No no no no no. Uh, thank you, thank you for that invitation, 291 00:13:42,510 --> 00:13:46,241 but I cannot go to the baseball game on the Sabbath, 292 00:13:46,281 --> 00:13:48,510 I'm sorry. It's impossible. 293 00:13:48,549 --> 00:13:51,313 I'll take a rain check, however. 294 00:13:51,351 --> 00:13:53,649 Ho ho ho ho, okay. 295 00:13:55,089 --> 00:13:57,022 I'd love to go to the game, but not on the Sabbath. 296 00:13:57,056 --> 00:13:58,990 The Yankees are playing and I would... 297 00:13:59,025 --> 00:14:00,959 - I would kill to go down there. - You're a Yankee fan. 298 00:14:00,993 --> 00:14:03,961 Oh, I'm a Yankee fan... I'm a huge Yankee fan. 299 00:14:03,995 --> 00:14:07,829 - I love the Yankees. - You love the Yankees?! 300 00:14:07,866 --> 00:14:10,164 There's so many times when the Yankees were playing in Anaheim 301 00:14:10,202 --> 00:14:11,998 that I've so much wanted to go to see it. 302 00:14:12,036 --> 00:14:14,504 I even cheat by watching it on television. I shouldn't do that. 303 00:14:14,538 --> 00:14:17,132 - Whoa, whoa, whoa... - Shh. 304 00:14:23,012 --> 00:14:26,139 There are two things in my life that I love. 305 00:14:26,181 --> 00:14:29,048 Besides family and my work 306 00:14:29,084 --> 00:14:31,052 - I love baseball. Love baseball. - Uh-huh. 307 00:14:31,086 --> 00:14:32,746 ...especially Yankees. I love to ski. 308 00:14:35,590 --> 00:14:37,888 My yarmulke almost fell off, I'm so taken aback. 309 00:14:37,925 --> 00:14:40,654 - What? - Skiing. You said "skiing"? 310 00:14:40,694 --> 00:14:43,128 - Yeah. I'm not that good, but I like... - I'm not so good myself, 311 00:14:43,163 --> 00:14:45,028 - but I love it. - You love it? 312 00:14:45,065 --> 00:14:47,294 Oh... my favorite thing to do in life. 313 00:14:50,970 --> 00:14:53,268 Isn't that a wonderful coincidence? 314 00:14:53,305 --> 00:14:55,431 - I have a little ski lodge. - Really? 315 00:14:55,473 --> 00:14:58,965 Yes. I would love to invite you 316 00:14:59,010 --> 00:15:02,672 - to go skiing - My goodness, what a wonderful gesture. 317 00:15:05,282 --> 00:15:07,375 - Hello. - Hello. 318 00:15:07,417 --> 00:15:08,940 - Welcome back. - So... 319 00:15:08,985 --> 00:15:11,647 you know, I spoke to our mutual friend. 320 00:15:11,687 --> 00:15:13,780 - Oh, good. Did you say hello for me? - I did. 321 00:15:13,823 --> 00:15:15,916 - Oh, great, thank you. - I did say hello, 322 00:15:15,958 --> 00:15:20,656 and I couldn't help but mention the... 323 00:15:20,695 --> 00:15:24,562 the whole kind of small penis thing. It came out. 324 00:15:24,598 --> 00:15:27,829 - Oh my gosh, was he upset? - Not at all, not at all. 325 00:15:27,868 --> 00:15:29,392 - No. - Really? 326 00:15:29,436 --> 00:15:33,303 In fact, he had a completely different take on it than you. 327 00:15:34,908 --> 00:15:38,604 He said the problem didn't lie with his small penis, 328 00:15:38,644 --> 00:15:40,635 but rather... 329 00:15:40,679 --> 00:15:42,670 with your big vagina. 330 00:15:46,117 --> 00:15:48,108 - Is that what he did?! - Yeah. 331 00:15:49,120 --> 00:15:50,951 - Big. - This is my vagina? 332 00:15:50,988 --> 00:15:53,820 Huge. Huge. 333 00:15:53,857 --> 00:15:56,018 Are you kidding? I don't have a big vagina. 334 00:15:56,059 --> 00:15:58,254 - You got the huge vagina. - Oh, do I? 335 00:15:58,295 --> 00:16:00,125 - You're blaming the small penis, - Yeah... 336 00:16:00,162 --> 00:16:03,063 you got the huge vagina. It's not necessary. 337 00:16:03,098 --> 00:16:05,396 I made a little... you're the one that egged it... 338 00:16:05,434 --> 00:16:07,594 Methinks the lady doth protest too much. 339 00:16:07,635 --> 00:16:10,069 Hm. 340 00:16:12,473 --> 00:16:15,930 This guy is the head of the whole kidney consortium. 341 00:16:15,976 --> 00:16:18,877 I can get you to the top of the list. I'm not kidding. 342 00:16:18,912 --> 00:16:21,812 I got him eating out of my hand. He's going skiing with me. 343 00:16:21,848 --> 00:16:23,975 Holy shit. That would be unbelievable! 344 00:16:24,016 --> 00:16:25,847 You know what would really cinch it? 345 00:16:25,885 --> 00:16:27,853 He's a Yankee fan... big Mickey Mantle fan. 346 00:16:27,887 --> 00:16:29,854 Let me give him the Mickey Mantle ball. 347 00:16:29,888 --> 00:16:33,085 You're out of your fucking mind? You don't want it? 348 00:16:33,124 --> 00:16:34,921 - I'm nuts? - You don't want it anymore? 349 00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:37,120 Give that guy the Mickey Mantle ball, it's done, it's over. 350 00:16:37,161 --> 00:16:39,254 All right, give it to him. Give it to him. 351 00:16:42,733 --> 00:16:45,292 - Hey. - What? 352 00:16:45,335 --> 00:16:48,395 - Where's the ball? - I don't know. 353 00:16:48,438 --> 00:16:50,406 What? Look, maybe it rolled off. 354 00:16:50,440 --> 00:16:52,236 Look behind the picture. 355 00:16:52,274 --> 00:16:54,333 - Is it there? - No. 356 00:16:54,376 --> 00:16:56,571 - You're kidding me. - No. 357 00:16:56,612 --> 00:16:58,738 Jesus Christ. 358 00:16:58,779 --> 00:17:00,747 Oh, Mickey. 359 00:17:00,781 --> 00:17:02,976 Goddamn it! 360 00:17:03,017 --> 00:17:05,008 - Oh, shit. - Who's been here? 361 00:17:05,052 --> 00:17:09,249 "Who's been here?" Lisa, the nurse, a couple of close friends and you. 362 00:17:09,289 --> 00:17:10,984 It's no way my friends are gonna take anything, 363 00:17:11,024 --> 00:17:13,355 and her... I see her leave with the same uniform. 364 00:17:13,392 --> 00:17:15,986 She has no pockets. I mean, if she, if she hid a ball in there, 365 00:17:16,028 --> 00:17:18,019 it would look like an elephant tumor. 366 00:17:19,031 --> 00:17:20,520 Unless... 367 00:17:21,599 --> 00:17:23,590 Oh, hey. 368 00:17:25,737 --> 00:17:27,704 There was a Mickey Mantle ball, 369 00:17:27,738 --> 00:17:30,036 his 500th home run 370 00:17:30,073 --> 00:17:32,132 right over over there, 371 00:17:32,175 --> 00:17:35,166 and it's missing. 372 00:17:35,211 --> 00:17:39,477 - Have you seen it? - No, I have not. 373 00:17:39,515 --> 00:17:43,143 Hmm, it's kind of curious, given that... 374 00:17:43,184 --> 00:17:46,779 nobody else has been in the house, save for a few friends. 375 00:17:51,659 --> 00:17:55,618 Could a ball worth an excess of $20,000 376 00:17:55,663 --> 00:17:58,460 just disappear into thin air? 377 00:18:00,333 --> 00:18:02,733 Wanna tell me what you're driving at? 378 00:18:02,769 --> 00:18:04,895 I'll tell you what I'm driving at. 379 00:18:04,937 --> 00:18:07,531 I submit you took that baseball, 380 00:18:07,572 --> 00:18:10,666 stashed it in your unusually large vagina, 381 00:18:10,709 --> 00:18:12,835 and walked right on out of here! 382 00:18:19,349 --> 00:18:21,180 - Let me tell you something. - Yeah? 383 00:18:21,217 --> 00:18:23,048 - This bread... - Good bread, right? 384 00:18:23,086 --> 00:18:25,213 My second piece... I'm surprised you're even letting me. 385 00:18:25,255 --> 00:18:26,744 The bread and the croutons. 386 00:18:26,789 --> 00:18:28,654 Hey, by the way, have you seen my cell phone? 387 00:18:28,691 --> 00:18:30,249 - No. - No? 388 00:18:30,292 --> 00:18:32,351 - You can't find it? - No. 389 00:18:32,394 --> 00:18:34,258 - No, it's gone. - We'll look again when we get home. 390 00:18:34,295 --> 00:18:37,924 Oh, remember? 391 00:18:37,966 --> 00:18:41,059 - You invited me to the ski lodge? - Yeah. 392 00:18:41,101 --> 00:18:43,069 - I've changed my mind. - Gonna go? 393 00:18:43,103 --> 00:18:45,162 - Really? - We... I'd like to go. 394 00:18:45,205 --> 00:18:48,298 - Great. Oh that'll be great. - You didn't tell me that. 395 00:18:48,341 --> 00:18:50,707 We're gonna have a great time skiing, snowboarding maybe. 396 00:18:50,743 --> 00:18:52,870 - I would love to try snowboarding. - Yeah, I'm gonna try it. 397 00:18:52,912 --> 00:18:55,277 - I'm gonna take a lesson. - Yes, we'll take a lesson. 398 00:18:55,313 --> 00:18:57,304 - That's good. - That's fun. You'll like that. 399 00:18:57,349 --> 00:18:59,442 - Oh my gosh. - I'm not gonna snowboard. 400 00:18:59,484 --> 00:19:02,509 - That's okay. - Oh, and I hope you don't mind, 401 00:19:02,553 --> 00:19:04,680 but, ahem... I've also 402 00:19:04,722 --> 00:19:06,690 taken the liberty, with your permission, 403 00:19:06,724 --> 00:19:09,624 of inviting an orthodox Jew and his daughter. 404 00:19:09,659 --> 00:19:13,220 Wait, what do you mean, an orthodox... an orthodox Jew and his daughter? 405 00:19:13,262 --> 00:19:15,127 Where? To stay in the chalet with us? 406 00:19:15,164 --> 00:19:16,324 - Okay. - The guy? 407 00:19:16,366 --> 00:19:18,026 - The guy, yeah. - What guy? 408 00:19:18,066 --> 00:19:22,002 Okay, he's the head of the kidney consortium 409 00:19:22,037 --> 00:19:25,699 and I'm trying to get Richard Lewis moved up on the list. 410 00:19:25,740 --> 00:19:28,868 Let's be realistic. You're trying to get Lewis moved up on the list 411 00:19:28,909 --> 00:19:30,467 or you're trying to save your own kidney? 412 00:19:30,511 --> 00:19:34,037 - What's the difference? - Let's be clear on what it's about. 413 00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:36,548 - I don't wanna give him my own kidney. - I don't know if I want 414 00:19:36,583 --> 00:19:38,312 to spend a weekend with these people. 415 00:19:38,351 --> 00:19:40,545 Forget the whole thing. I don't want my kidney. 416 00:19:40,586 --> 00:19:42,713 - You know what? You... - He can have my kidney! 417 00:19:42,755 --> 00:19:44,985 I'll walk around with a dialysis machine. That will be fine! 418 00:19:45,024 --> 00:19:48,823 - That's fine. Don't worry about it. - If you gotta do it, 419 00:19:48,860 --> 00:19:51,852 - you gotta do it. It is okay. Fine. - Thank you. Thank you. 420 00:19:51,896 --> 00:19:53,624 We don't have a choice. You invited them. 421 00:19:53,663 --> 00:19:56,029 We don't have a choice, but it's a mitzvah. 422 00:19:56,066 --> 00:19:57,795 You spend time with them. 423 00:19:57,834 --> 00:19:59,802 I'm not going to hang out with them all day. 424 00:19:59,836 --> 00:20:01,496 Unfortunately, that's not 425 00:20:01,537 --> 00:20:04,005 - the worst of the situation. - What? 426 00:20:09,511 --> 00:20:11,206 She's a wonderful cook, isn't she? 427 00:20:11,246 --> 00:20:13,214 - My Susie? - My pleasure. 428 00:20:13,248 --> 00:20:17,616 - Isn't she? Isn't she some cook? - How did you two meet? 429 00:20:17,651 --> 00:20:20,950 - Interesting, interesting. - Uh, we met at a Hillel... 430 00:20:20,988 --> 00:20:23,285 - mixer, a function. - Oh, in college? 431 00:20:23,322 --> 00:20:27,816 Yes, a singles and he was there trying to pick up every girl imaginable. 432 00:20:27,860 --> 00:20:30,453 - I was pretty swinging in those days. - Yes. 433 00:20:30,495 --> 00:20:32,725 I was in the band, okay? 434 00:20:32,764 --> 00:20:35,790 The girls were pretty interested, you know? 435 00:20:35,834 --> 00:20:37,562 With the guitar, they liked that. 436 00:20:37,601 --> 00:20:39,569 - Not true, not true. - Like a rock band? 437 00:20:39,603 --> 00:20:42,037 - Jewish folk music, Jewish folk songs. - Folk, folk. 438 00:20:42,073 --> 00:20:46,338 - Like what songs? - Um, "Gefilte Fish Blues"... 439 00:20:46,376 --> 00:20:49,539 Um, "My Freaking Back is Killing Me and 440 00:20:49,579 --> 00:20:51,547 It's Making It Hard to Kvell"... 441 00:20:51,581 --> 00:20:55,414 - Uh, what was the name of your band? - "The Hipsters." 442 00:20:55,451 --> 00:20:57,351 Yes, it was "The Hipsters." 443 00:20:57,386 --> 00:20:59,182 - "Larry David and The Hipsters." - Yeah. 444 00:20:59,220 --> 00:21:00,847 And then, I left The Hipsters, 445 00:21:00,888 --> 00:21:02,913 - and I just became Larry David. - Larry David. 446 00:21:02,957 --> 00:21:04,788 And The Hipsters went out on their own. 447 00:21:04,826 --> 00:21:07,521 - And they became quite successful. - Yes. 448 00:21:07,561 --> 00:21:10,223 But I wasn't attracted to him from the band. 449 00:21:10,263 --> 00:21:12,754 - Honestly, I felt sorry for him. - Why? 450 00:21:12,799 --> 00:21:15,232 That's was the... 451 00:21:15,267 --> 00:21:18,168 It was an attraction out of pity 'cause I'm always the one 452 00:21:18,204 --> 00:21:19,933 to take in stray animals, you know, that's... 453 00:21:19,972 --> 00:21:21,871 You remind me a little of my wife... 454 00:21:21,906 --> 00:21:24,898 - Oh, how lovely. - I'd like to meet her at some point. 455 00:21:24,943 --> 00:21:27,605 Well, she's passed away a number of years ago. 456 00:21:27,645 --> 00:21:29,874 - Six years. - Six years? Difficult. 457 00:21:29,913 --> 00:21:33,280 - Eh... - Very. 458 00:21:35,419 --> 00:21:37,511 So, anyway, enough about us. 459 00:21:37,553 --> 00:21:41,353 - What do you do? - I'm the head of a foundation 460 00:21:41,390 --> 00:21:44,620 that finds kidneys for... 461 00:21:44,659 --> 00:21:46,752 - needy recipients. - Global. 462 00:21:46,795 --> 00:21:51,128 A very, very dear friend of mine actually... 463 00:21:51,165 --> 00:21:53,065 - Needs a kidney. - Needs a kidneys and he's... 464 00:21:53,100 --> 00:21:55,227 he's on the bottom of the list, Richard Lewis, 465 00:21:55,269 --> 00:21:57,634 - perhaps you heard? - Yes, I have. 466 00:21:57,670 --> 00:22:00,230 - Wonderful comedian. - Wears black all the time. 467 00:22:00,273 --> 00:22:02,207 - Yes, yeah. - I would give him my own kidney, 468 00:22:02,242 --> 00:22:04,574 if only we were a match, but unfortunately... 469 00:22:04,611 --> 00:22:07,101 - that's alas, that is not the case. - That's God's will. 470 00:22:07,146 --> 00:22:08,613 Of course. 471 00:22:11,717 --> 00:22:12,910 Excuse me? 472 00:23:13,503 --> 00:23:15,528 What the fuck? What are you doing?! 473 00:23:15,572 --> 00:23:17,732 - What do you think you're doing? - I'm not doing anything. 474 00:23:17,773 --> 00:23:19,570 - What are you doing in bed with me? - My back hurts. 475 00:23:19,608 --> 00:23:21,576 I don't give a shit. Do you think I care about your back? 476 00:23:21,610 --> 00:23:24,101 You know how much I've done for you this weekend? 477 00:23:24,146 --> 00:23:25,476 - Get the fuck out of bed. - It's cold. 478 00:23:25,513 --> 00:23:26,707 Get the fuck out of bed! 479 00:23:39,725 --> 00:23:42,023 - What's that smell? - What? Eggs. 480 00:23:42,061 --> 00:23:44,256 What?! Bacon?! 481 00:23:44,296 --> 00:23:46,264 What, are you crazy? You're making bacon?! 482 00:23:46,298 --> 00:23:47,764 - Why? - Why? 483 00:23:47,799 --> 00:23:50,563 - What? - Huh? 484 00:23:50,602 --> 00:23:53,435 People don't eat bacon. What, are you nuts? 485 00:23:53,471 --> 00:23:54,960 It's not kosher. People... kosher, 486 00:23:55,005 --> 00:23:57,530 - you know what that is. - Well, they don't have to eat it. 487 00:23:58,542 --> 00:24:00,305 How did you do last night? 488 00:24:01,777 --> 00:24:03,335 I did fine. How did you do? 489 00:24:03,379 --> 00:24:05,711 I missed you, honey. 490 00:24:05,748 --> 00:24:08,546 I missed you too. 491 00:24:08,584 --> 00:24:10,642 - Good morning. - Good morning. 492 00:24:10,685 --> 00:24:12,983 - Good morning. - Uh, were these not the plates 493 00:24:13,021 --> 00:24:14,716 we ate the pot roast on last night? 494 00:24:14,756 --> 00:24:18,247 They are the same plates, but they've been washed. 495 00:24:18,292 --> 00:24:21,227 I shouldn't be having dairy on these kind of plates. 496 00:24:21,262 --> 00:24:24,128 You know, as you know, the dairy and the meat are on two separate plates. 497 00:24:24,163 --> 00:24:25,790 That's a necessary rule of being kosher. 498 00:24:25,832 --> 00:24:28,562 Where are the milchig plates? Where are they? 499 00:24:28,601 --> 00:24:30,228 - The milchig plates! - Where are they? 500 00:24:30,270 --> 00:24:33,568 The milchig plates... well, they should be in the cabinet. 501 00:24:33,605 --> 00:24:37,973 You were told about the milchig plates, were you not? 502 00:24:38,009 --> 00:24:40,500 Okay. Well, I'm sorry about the uh... 503 00:24:40,544 --> 00:24:43,240 That's fine, I have to bury the plate and we'll be done with it. 504 00:24:43,281 --> 00:24:45,441 - You're gonna do what? - You have to bury the plate. 505 00:24:45,482 --> 00:24:48,110 Why would you bury a plate? 506 00:24:52,455 --> 00:24:55,423 Why would you bury a plate? 507 00:24:55,457 --> 00:24:57,755 Tell her. 508 00:24:57,793 --> 00:25:00,158 You have to bury the plate to purify it. It has to go underground. 509 00:25:00,194 --> 00:25:03,186 - Purify, you have to purify. - I'm sure you have a whole set of china 510 00:25:03,231 --> 00:25:04,721 - in your backyard. - You can't just wash it 511 00:25:04,766 --> 00:25:08,030 - and call it a day? - Uh, no we can't. 512 00:25:08,068 --> 00:25:10,229 - I guess we'll starve tonight. - No, no, you can't wash it 513 00:25:10,270 --> 00:25:14,104 and call it a day, no. That's not how it works. 514 00:25:14,141 --> 00:25:15,903 Do you wanna bury it as the man of the house? 515 00:25:15,941 --> 00:25:18,637 Nah, you bury. You bury, you bury. 516 00:25:18,678 --> 00:25:20,646 It's a little early for burying. 517 00:25:20,680 --> 00:25:23,978 I don't like to bury before coffee. 518 00:25:24,015 --> 00:25:26,415 - Do I smell bacon? - Bacon? 519 00:25:26,451 --> 00:25:28,544 - Well... - No. Oh, I was a little gassy. 520 00:25:28,586 --> 00:25:30,382 I lit a match. 521 00:25:33,724 --> 00:25:35,419 You are a guest in this house. 522 00:25:39,629 --> 00:25:41,722 Larry, come on. 523 00:25:58,912 --> 00:26:00,903 Larry. 524 00:26:09,888 --> 00:26:12,448 Get off my skis. 525 00:26:23,200 --> 00:26:25,327 - How about coming for one more run? - Oh, sweetheart, 526 00:26:25,369 --> 00:26:27,427 - I'm finished. - Come on, we have time for one more. 527 00:26:27,470 --> 00:26:30,132 - Whoa-ho. Hey hey hey hey hey. - Hey hey hey. 528 00:26:30,172 --> 00:26:32,402 - New world record. - Whoa. 529 00:26:32,441 --> 00:26:33,999 - Hello, Ben. - Hello... 530 00:26:34,043 --> 00:26:36,010 - Hello, Rachel. - Hi, Larry. 531 00:26:36,044 --> 00:26:38,808 - Boy, that was hard. - Huh? 532 00:26:38,847 --> 00:26:41,145 - How much fun is this? - I'm having a good time. 533 00:26:41,182 --> 00:26:44,014 - Isn't this fun? - But I'm going home because I'm bushed. 534 00:26:44,051 --> 00:26:46,315 - I'm gonna go for another run. - Go go, sweetheart, go. 535 00:26:46,353 --> 00:26:47,786 - All right. - Why don't you go with her? 536 00:26:47,821 --> 00:26:49,344 - You got time for one more run. - One more? 537 00:26:49,389 --> 00:26:51,254 - Go ahead. - One more run. Okay. 538 00:26:51,290 --> 00:26:53,281 - I'm just gonna go back. - No, there's time. 539 00:26:53,326 --> 00:26:55,294 No no, we're losing time. No no, it's fine. I'm tired. 540 00:26:55,328 --> 00:26:57,158 - One more run. - One more. 541 00:26:57,195 --> 00:26:58,856 We'll do one more. Rachel, uh... 542 00:26:58,897 --> 00:27:01,866 He'll keep you company. 543 00:27:03,535 --> 00:27:06,332 Larry, incidentally, the thing we were discussing earlier. 544 00:27:06,370 --> 00:27:09,965 I'm thinking about it, and I think I can actually help your friend. 545 00:27:11,175 --> 00:27:14,541 I think I can move him up on the list. 546 00:27:16,179 --> 00:27:18,113 I'm fainting. I'm gonna faint. 547 00:27:18,148 --> 00:27:20,240 - Well, don't do that. - I'm going to faint. 548 00:27:20,282 --> 00:27:22,944 It's a pleasure to do it for you. 549 00:27:22,985 --> 00:27:25,851 I know where you're going... When he dies... 550 00:27:25,887 --> 00:27:28,822 right, right upstairs he's going. Right upstairs. 551 00:27:28,856 --> 00:27:31,017 - God bless you. - You're taking an escalator up there. 552 00:27:31,058 --> 00:27:33,582 God bless you. Now you two kids go. Go ski. 553 00:27:33,627 --> 00:27:36,994 Rachel, come. Come. 554 00:27:47,705 --> 00:27:49,832 What do people have against whistlers? 555 00:27:49,874 --> 00:27:52,843 - Can you answer me this question? - I think it's annoying. 556 00:27:52,877 --> 00:27:56,073 I think it's 'cause they don't like to see people happy. 557 00:27:56,113 --> 00:27:58,479 And who can blame them? It's like a happy couple. 558 00:27:58,515 --> 00:28:01,609 Is there anything more disgusting than that? 559 00:28:03,119 --> 00:28:04,950 You know what I find very interesting? 560 00:28:04,987 --> 00:28:07,512 I can't draw to save my life, 561 00:28:07,557 --> 00:28:10,081 but yet, I'm a very good doodler. 562 00:28:10,125 --> 00:28:12,093 Don't you think that's ironic? 563 00:28:12,127 --> 00:28:13,924 It's somewhat ironic. 564 00:28:13,962 --> 00:28:15,759 Hey, when we get back to the lodge, 565 00:28:15,797 --> 00:28:18,321 how about you and I having a doodling contest, huh? 566 00:28:18,365 --> 00:28:21,732 - What do you say? - I'm feeling nauseous right now. 567 00:28:26,272 --> 00:28:27,899 Oh, you've gotta be kidding me. 568 00:28:27,941 --> 00:28:29,738 - What's going on? - Don't worry. 569 00:28:29,776 --> 00:28:32,005 It happens all the time. 570 00:28:34,413 --> 00:28:36,711 Should only be a few minutes. 571 00:28:49,593 --> 00:28:52,061 It's been 15 minutes already. 572 00:28:52,095 --> 00:28:53,459 What's going on? 573 00:28:53,496 --> 00:28:56,863 Shkiyas Hachama. That's what's going on. 574 00:28:57,867 --> 00:29:00,960 - What? - Shkiyas Hachama. 575 00:29:01,002 --> 00:29:02,663 Sundown. 576 00:29:02,704 --> 00:29:06,333 I can't be here alone with you after sundown. 577 00:29:06,374 --> 00:29:08,637 - Why not? - Because you're a man 578 00:29:08,675 --> 00:29:10,575 and I'm a single woman. 579 00:29:10,611 --> 00:29:14,980 - So? - So it's not allowed. 580 00:29:15,015 --> 00:29:17,175 - Who says so? - The Law, the Torah says so. 581 00:29:17,216 --> 00:29:19,707 - Hashem says so. - Hashem? 582 00:29:19,752 --> 00:29:22,414 - Do you know anything? - No, Hashem, I know. 583 00:29:22,455 --> 00:29:25,423 Anyway, it's okay. There's extenuating circumstances here. 584 00:29:25,457 --> 00:29:28,449 No such thing as extenuating circumstances. 585 00:29:29,494 --> 00:29:31,586 Well, you got another half hour. 586 00:29:31,629 --> 00:29:34,598 - 5:41. Shkiyas Hachama is at 5:41. - All right. 587 00:29:34,632 --> 00:29:36,327 - Well, that's a half hour. - Fine. 588 00:29:36,367 --> 00:29:38,891 They'll fix it. 589 00:29:52,847 --> 00:29:55,475 Freezing! 590 00:29:57,518 --> 00:29:59,951 I'm hungry too. 591 00:29:59,986 --> 00:30:03,820 - You hungry? - Yes, I'm very hungry. 592 00:30:10,062 --> 00:30:12,087 What the heck is this? 593 00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:18,259 Hey! 594 00:30:18,303 --> 00:30:20,863 Edible underwear! 595 00:30:20,905 --> 00:30:23,464 I must... the private investigator... 596 00:30:23,507 --> 00:30:27,034 when I went... unreal! 597 00:30:39,254 --> 00:30:41,779 They're not bad. 598 00:30:41,823 --> 00:30:43,449 - How much time do we have left... - Want some? 599 00:30:43,490 --> 00:30:44,548 - No, thank you. - Take a bite. 600 00:30:44,592 --> 00:30:46,059 - I'm fine. - Take a bite. 601 00:30:46,093 --> 00:30:48,152 Move that away from me. 602 00:30:52,632 --> 00:30:55,328 Just tell me how much time we have left. 603 00:30:55,368 --> 00:30:59,269 Well, I think you got about two minutes. 604 00:31:02,774 --> 00:31:05,799 Somebody's gonna have to jump. 605 00:31:05,843 --> 00:31:07,834 - Oh, stop. - Stop what? 606 00:31:07,878 --> 00:31:09,607 I can't be here with you after sundown! 607 00:31:09,647 --> 00:31:11,615 There's no other way. Somebody's gonna have to jump! 608 00:31:11,649 --> 00:31:15,084 You're gonna have to jump! 609 00:31:15,118 --> 00:31:17,143 Are you gonna jump? 610 00:31:18,955 --> 00:31:21,479 What, are you fucking nuts? 611 00:31:23,859 --> 00:31:25,690 What? 612 00:31:25,728 --> 00:31:27,456 What are you doing? 613 00:31:28,463 --> 00:31:29,691 - No. - Hold my phone. 614 00:31:29,731 --> 00:31:32,723 Are you crazy? Are you insane? 615 00:31:57,488 --> 00:31:59,285 - Yeah? - Hey, Richard. It's me. 616 00:31:59,323 --> 00:32:01,553 - Yeah, hi, Larry. - Listen, 617 00:32:01,592 --> 00:32:02,957 what I told you earlier about the kidney? 618 00:32:02,993 --> 00:32:05,222 - Yeah, yeah. - It's not gonna happen. 619 00:32:05,261 --> 00:32:06,990 You're shitting me. Why not?! 620 00:32:07,030 --> 00:32:08,930 Uh, I can't go into it right now, 621 00:32:08,965 --> 00:32:10,795 but trust me, it's just... it's not gonna work out. 622 00:32:10,832 --> 00:32:12,891 - Oh, shit. - Hey, listen, 623 00:32:12,934 --> 00:32:15,402 did I leave my cell phone in your house? 624 00:32:15,437 --> 00:32:17,064 I, I, I don't know. "Did you leave"... 625 00:32:17,105 --> 00:32:19,368 Did Larry David leave his cell phone in the house? 626 00:32:19,407 --> 00:32:21,307 - No. - No. 627 00:32:21,342 --> 00:32:23,936 I'm gonna call my cell phone. If you hear it ringing, 628 00:32:23,978 --> 00:32:27,208 - pick it up, okay? - Fine, fine. 49031

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