All language subtitles for Curb.Your.Enthusiasm.S05E04.DVDRip.x264-SARTRE

Ahh, chicken teriyaki boy!

Chicken teriyaki boy!

- Gentlemen!
- Chicken.

I loved it when
it was so big, you know?

Until today,
I never even thought about that,

'cause usually...
hello!

- Hello.
- You remember Yoshi.

- Yoshi, hey!
- Hello, nice to see you.

I like that, a little bow.
See that?

- I did.
- I love that bow.

I am nuts about that bow.
It humbles you.

And we've got so many
cocky people in this country.

They need the humility
of the bow here.

- It's big in Japan.
- You should see

some of the sculptures
that we saw today.

- Really?
- Mmm-hmm,

there's one
that I think will be

perfect in our house
once we get back to it.

- Tell him about...
- We're looking for a big penis.

Did they have anything
at the gallery?

- Uh, not quite, no.
- He's... no.

- With some big balls...
- Okay, we've actually been talking...

- That's nice.
- Seriously about art, and it's not...

Look at this.
"Cofey was here."

- Mmm.
- What kind of moron is this Cofey,

- carving his nick... what is that?
- It's a shame.

- Yeah, it's very childish.
- Takes a knife out

- and carves into the table?
- Inappropriate.

- How inappropriate is that?
- Mmm.

Hey, by the way,

my dad and your dad

are becoming very friendly
in that nursing home.

- Yes, yes.
- Oh no, isn't that cute?

- Yeah.
- It was just his 80th birthday party.

We took him to Japan.

- No kidding?
- Really?

Yes, he hadn't been back
since the war.

He saw
some of his family...

- Oh my gosh.
...and some of his military buddies

- from the Air Force.
- He was in the war?

- Huh, wow.
- What did he do in the war?

- He was a pilot.
- Really? What kind of a pilot?

- A kamikaze pilot.
- Wow.

Mmm.

- Hmm.
- Wow.

- Wouldn't he be dead?
- Um, not all of them died.

I know, but kamikaze pilot
kind of implies

that, you know...
a kamikaze pilot

is a pilot who crashed
and died, right?

- But he didn't.
- He survived, yes.

- Thank goodness for that.
- He survived?

- Here's to... what did you say?
- Kanpai.

What happened exactly?
Did he try

and crash the plane
into a ship?

Ahem, he grazed the ship.

- Mmm.
- Okay.

- All right.
- All right, he grazed the ship.

- He grazed it.
- Hmm, is that because

there was some kind of malfunction
with the plane?

It doesn't really matter.
He grazed it...

- I'm just curious.
...and he lived, and...

- And he is alive.
...and he's alive.

Yeah, but at the last
second, what happened?

Was he coming down,
all of a sudden, he said,

you know, "Jesus, this kamikaze
business might not be for me.

I think maybe I'II...
go back to base"?

- Okay, you know, it's...
- Was is something like that, huh?

So what happened
at the last second there?

I'm uncertain.

- Hmm.
- You know what's good

is the rainbow roll,
because it gives you

- a little bit of everything. Hi.
- Are you ready to order?

- Yes.
- I will have the chicken teriyaki.

Chicken teriyaki.

Chicken!

Chicken.

Chicken!

How about you, Yosh?

A little chicken?

So, you know, I hired
a private investigator

to find out
if I'm adopted.

What do you care now for?

Isn't the damage done already
from your parents?

I wouldn't want to know,
to be honest with you.

Hey, how's Lewis?
You hear from Lewis?

He's... something wrong
with his kidney.

Oh yeah?
What, like a stone or something?

I don't know what he's got.
He's getting tests.

- Fold your card.
- I just know he's concerned.

He gets so worked up.
Doesn't surprise me.

- He doesn't look that good.
- I'm in.

I present to you a straight
with a seven high.

- Thank you very much.
- It's no good. I got a flush.

- Again?
- Yeah, that's a nice hand.

- I think it's a trick deck.
- He was born to poker players

- and given up for adoption.
- Here are some pretzels.

Oh, thank you.

Did the pizza place
call by any chance?

- Hey, isn't your brother playing?
- Yeah, where's Yoshi?

Yeah, what happened to your brother?
He told me last night

- he was coming.
- Yeah, Yoshi's supposed to be here.

But I can't get a hold of him.
Maybe he's stuck in traffic.

Hey, so our fathers are
becoming very friendly

- at the nursing home.
- Really?

- We should all get together.
- Absolutely!

- I'll be there tomorrow.
- Oh.

- I'm gonna play a little bingo.
- Maybe your father.

- Bingo is the only thing...
- I'm gonna check on pizza.

- That I feel any optimism about.
- You play bingo?

When I play I think I'm gonna win.
Isn't that insane?

- Do you win?
- I do win.

It's completely random.

I know it's random.
I have a winning percentage

- that defies logic.
- Hello, yeah.

You win more often
than the other people?

- He gets more diagonals than anybody.
- What?

Oh my God.
What...

Cedars Sinai, okay.
We'll be right there. Bye.

- What's wrong?
- Mayuki,

- Yoshi tried to commit suicide.
- What?!

He tried to commit suicide.
Cedars Sinai.

- I gotta leave. I'll be back.
- Let's... okay.

- Get the coat.
- Here's the coat.

- Keys keys keys.
- Yes, it's in here.

Let's go.

Wow.

Suicide?

- Jeez Louise!
- Oh wow.

I just saw him last night.

We had dinner with him.

You did?
Did he seem weird?

- No.
- Was he nervous? Was he anxious?

Could he have lost face
or have been ashamed

or humiliated
or anything?

Uh...

So...

what should we do?

Well, you know,

- we're here.
- We are here.

That's true,
because, you know,

I had to really finagle
to get out tonight.

I'm kinda happy
to be anywhere.

And you know,
we can't leave the house.

- It's... they're gone.
- We don't have keys.

And we don't know
the alarm code or anything.

- And a pizza is coming.
- Got a pizza coming.

Yeah, got a pizza coming.

And he tried, he didn't
actually kill himself.

- Right.
- That's a very good distinction.

- Because if he said he tried to...
- Right.

That means he didn't,
which means he's alive.

- He's here.
- Thank God.

A pair of fours.

I'm gonna see what else
is in the fridge.

What the hell is going on?

- Hey.
- How's Yoshi?

- You're still playing?
- Yeah.

- I took an orange.
- You want some pizza?

- What are you doing here?
- What do you mean?

Yoshi's in the hospital.
He tried to commit suicide!

- How's he doing?
- He's okay, right?

How's he doing?!
He almost killed himself!

- We figured it was...
- I told you guys we should leave.

- You figured what?
- You never said that.

- Hey, get out!
- You ordered another pizza!

- Get the fuck out.
- What?

It's over.
It's over. Out.

Out. Out. It's over. It's over.
Leave. Leave.

- We didn't even settle up!
- Out!

- I was up about $400.
- Let's go. Out. Out.

- Man, oh man.
- Let's go.

Pizza was coming, it would have
been rude to leave a pizza guy...

It would have been rude to stop
and pick it up on your way home, too.

- We didn't know your alarm code.
- I don't have an alarm!

Hey, did Yoshi
mention my name?

He's got tubes
coming out of his mouth.

- That means no.
- Okay. All right.

- Get the fuck out.
- All right.

Say hello for me
if you see him.

Oh my God, did you hear
what happened to Yoshi?

Yeah, he's okay, though.
He didn't... he's fine.

- Thank God!
- Yeah.

- How do you know?
- He sent me a suicide email.

A suicide email?!

He had some things
he wanted to say before he...

What did he say?

It's very private, Larry.

Hey, we're married,
you know.

It's part of the whole
marriage thing.

I have to tell you,
when you get married,

you not only get the sex,
but you get all the other stuff too.

All the information from the wife
who doesn't hold any secrets.

If he wanted you to see it,
he would have copied you.

Did he copy other people?

He CC'd
a few people, yes.

Are you kidding?!

I wanna know.
What did he say?

Stop it!
I'll delete it.

I'll delete it.
Stop it, get off me.

N-44.

- Four four!
- You're so noisy.

- One to go.
- I don't believe it.

- Need one!
- G-41.

- G-41.
- 41, yeah.

G-41.
Not in my purview.

Not in my purview.

L-20.

- L-20.
- L-20?

- L-20.
- Bingo!

Oh, he has...
oh my.

- Bingo.
- I don't believe it.

- Bingo.
- All right.

- Let me see, let me...
- You're not the checker.

- Lenore is the checker.
- Lenore, Lenore, check this out.

- Bingo. Watch.
- Let's see it.

Okay...

Okay, I'm sorry, sir.

I did not call l-17.

- What are you talking about?
- No, I never did.

- Yeah, l-17.
- That is not correct.

- I did not call l-17.
- You... excuse me, excuse me...

Ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha.
Cheat.

- All right, just be patient.
- You called l-17.

- Let me see that pad.
- No, you're not gonna see this pad.

- Nobody checks out this pad.
- Why can't I check out your pad?

Because I never let anyone

- look at my pad.
- Really? Aha.

- She never does.
- Good for you, Lenore.

We're going to continue
with the game.

- Ha-ha-ha.
- Just try to relax.

You gotta listen to her.
She knows what she's doing.

Well, listen,
she's my friend.

G-55.

What's the number?

- I don't know the number.
- Bingo!

- Oh, she... oh, she has...
- Bingo!

- Oh!
- She has bingo.

- Ruthie, do we have bingo?
- Ooh-ooh.

- B-l-N-G-O!
- Let me see, Ruthie.

- There it is.
- Oh, well...

- She has the bingo.
- Oh yes, perfect!

- Yes, of course.
- Ruthie gets a dollar!

Ha-ha, I won a dollar!

I won, everybody!
I won!

- Bingo!
- Oh, sit down. Sit down.

I had bingo.
You all know I had bingo.

And I won your dollar.

There's something fishy
going on in this place.

I'm gonna buy you
a piece of cheesecake.

Thank you very much.
I love cheesecake.

...101.
Actually I took the 110

- up to the... through the pass.
- Oh, hey.

Hello.

Hey, my wife tells me

Yoshi's doing great.

Yeah, he's fine.
He's home now.

Good news!
Fantastic.

Let me ask you something.
Have you ever played in that bingo game?

Have you ever noticed
anything strange going on there?

I need to talk
to you, Larry.

Don't, don't try
to get involved.

Don't try to pretend
you're concerned.

- I was concerned.
- Concerned?

When we went to the hospital,
I come back,

you guys are all still
playing poker, smoking, eating pizza.

That's why we were there,
because we were concerned.

We wanted to show support, so when you
got home your buddies would be there

and you're turning it
into a bad thing.

Yoshi tried
to commit suicide,

and you just completely
put it out of your head.

We didn't put it out.
We thought of it between hands.

Here's what you should be
concerned about...

you're the reason why Yoshi
tried to commit suicide.

Come on,
how's that possible?

The whole kamikaze thing.

I was curious about it,
so I asked.

Excuse me for having
a curious mind

that asks questions
of people.

I'm curious about how you can be
a kamikaze pilot

- and still be alive.
- There's a lot

of kamikaze pilots
that are still alive.

You say that,
and I say to you,

they are not
kamikaze pilots.

"He grazed the ship."
That sounds to me like

"I think I might head home.
This is fucking insane."

You taunted him,
you called him chicken.

I didn't call him chicken,
I ordered chicken!

- You called him chicken.
- I ordered chicken, you idiot.

There's a difference.
Here's the difference.

"You're a chicken."
"I'll have some chicken."

"You're a chicken."
"I'd like a piece of chicken."

Well, he understood it
as you calling him a chicken.

He must have taken it
the wrong way.

And what about you
sweeping the chips off the table?

You cost me a lot of money.
I know for a fact

you were down $300.
You actually owe me $300

- if you wanna get technical about it.
- I'll tell you what.

I'll get your chips back,
you'll get your money back,

but you're gotta do one thing...
you gotta call Yoshi at home

and apologize for the whole
kamikaze statement

- and the chicken thing.
- Okay, I will.

- Okay.
- I'm gonna call him and apologize.

- Okay.
- I'll use my dad's phone.

Hello.

Oh, hey, Yoshi,
this is Larry David.

Oh, hello Larry.

I'm actually...
I'm calling to apologize.

I'm sorry
if I said anything

that might have been
inappropriate.

I didn't really mean
anything to happen.

I was just kinda curious...

...with the whole
kamikaze thing.

- You know, I hope...
- Are you eating something?

I'm eating
pistachio nuts.

You're eating
pistachio nuts

while you're
apologizing to me?

Yes, so?

You can't be sincere
about apologizing

and then snack
on pistachio nuts!

What?
I can eat and apologize.

There's no pistachio crunching
in apologizing.

I respectfully disagree.
I've snacked and apologized many times

and everyone's always accepted it
quite graciously.

That might be the way
you do things in your family,

but we don't snack
and apologize...

What, is that
a Japanese thing?

No!
No, that's a human thing...

Hey, did you mention me
in that suicide email?

- Hi.
- Oh Larry, I'm glad to see you.

- How are you, Dr. Skadden?
- I'm good. How's your dad?

- I think he's doing well.
- He's doing real well.

I'm gonna write him
a little prescription though.

- Maybe you want to have it filled.
- Okay.

- A little blood thinner.
- Um...

you know, I'm kinda glad
I ran into you.

I wanna talk to you a little bit
about something

that happened
to me today.

Let's keep this between
the two of us, okay?

- Sure.
- In the bingo game today...

I won, I yelled "Bingo."

Lenore, the woman
who runs the game,

came over,
looked at my card

and said she didn't call
one of the numbers.

Now look, I can hear
better than anybody

in that room, okay?
She called my number.

I listen, I pay attention.
I'm a good bingo player.

A minute later Ruth wins.

Lenore came over,

and she gives the dollar
to her friend.

And don't tell me,
after that game

her friend Ruthie
wasn't giving her 50�, all right?

I won that game, fair and square.
Fair and square.

Okay, so Larry, you think
Lenore is taking kick-back

- from calling the numbers?
- Yes, I do.

I think the bingo game
is fixed.

I think Lenore is
either in cahoots with Ruth

or maybe even a few other people.
I don't even know.

You know
what you should do?

Take off your
little smock here,

take off your tie,
sit in on a game,

keep your ears open.
Keep your ears open. Listen,

to see who's winning
at the bingo game.

You want me to go undercover to play
bingo? Is that what you're saying?

Do you know anything
about this game, doctor,

that you're not telling me?

I know the bingo is
for the residents, Larry.

And I know it takes place
on Wednesdays and Fridays.

That's what I know,
and I know they enjoy it.

Well, in a week or two, you're gonna
come up to me and go,

"Larry, you know what?

You were right
about that bingo game."

- I will check into it.
- Good, that's all I ask.

- I'll be happy to.
- That's all I ask. Just ask around.

Do a little check into it.
That's all I ask.

- I'm not asking a lot.
- No, not at all.

- Thank you. Okay.
- Okay, Larry.

- You have a good day.
- You too.

- Hello.
- How are you?

I'm well.
I have a prescription.

Okay.

- Is this for you?
- No, it's for my father.

Father.
Blood thinner.

You know, there's another
drug out on the market

that I personally like
a lot better.

- Really?
- Yeah.

My patients are...

they're a lot happier
with the other drug.

Huh.

If you like, I could
write it down for you.

But the doctor
prefers this one.

Yes,

but I prefer
the other one.

But he likes this one.

But I like that one.

Doctor...

pharmacist.

Doctor!

Pharmacist.

I'll go
with the pharmacist.

- I'm going with the pharmacist.
- Yes, sir.

I'm taking this to the doctor,
I'm getting a new prescription

- and I'll be back, Mr. Pharmacist.
- I'm glad.

- I'm going with you.
- Thank you, sir.

- Hey.
- Hey Larry, how are you?

Any progress on, uh...

the bingo business?

- No, no word on the bingo.
- Nothin'?

Nothin'.

Keep your eye
on this Ruth.

- Ruth?
- Yeah, Ruth.

She's bad news.
There's something about this woman

I don't trust. I don't know how she
got into this place.

Don't they have a screening process
of some kind?

Yes, Larry, we screen them to make sure
they're old and sick and need care.

Well, she's got some kind
of personality disorder I think.

Well, she's on a lot
of medication.

You think that's
an excuse really?

That's like
the Twinkie defense.

I'll continue
to investigate, Larry.

Okay.
Um, one other thing.

I just came
from the pharmacist.

He kinda wants to go a different way
with the medication.

Sorta disagreed with you.

The pharmacist?

Yeah, he wrote out
a drug here.

I don't know what it is,
but I need a prescription

from you for this.

You need a prescription
from me for something the pharmacist

- has suggested?
- He was quite passionate about it.

You know, he deals
with this stuff all the time.

I'm a doctor, Larry.

Well, he's a pharmacist.

Yes, and I'm a doctor.

He's a pharmacist.

- Doctor.
- Pharmacist.

Doctor.

Pharmacist.

Fine, you go
with the pharmacist.

Okay. Thank you.
Thank you very much.

You're welcome.
Have yourself a nice day.

Thank you!

Oh yes, fuck me!

I want your cock.

Oh, fuck me!
It feels so good, oh!

Yes, yes!

Oh, I want
your big cock!

- Fuck me!
- Yes!

Oh God, yes!
Oh!

Fuck me! Fuck me!

Yes!
Oh my God!

Yeah! Fuck yeah!

Whoo! Yeah!

Dad!
Dad, I'm coming in.

Shh shh.

You... I can hear it
in the lobby, this thing!

So what?
I can't hear, you know?

- It's too loud!
- It's very hard for me. I can't hear.

Please... oh, you turned it off.
Come on.

We can't watch porno together.
I don't think...

We don't have that kind
of relationship yet.

- But you ruined it for me now.
- Sorry.

- All right.
- Hey, that bingo game...

- Yeah.
- Something's fishy.

What are you talking about?
About bingo?

You noticed anything strange
going on in that...

like Ruthie,
does she win a lot?

Of course she wins a lot.
This woman is a winner.

She wins a lot?

Yes, of course she wins a lot.
She plays a lot...

Come in.

Hello there, Nattie!

Hello, Ruthie.
Come on.

- Good afternoon.
- Yes, hello.

Come, sit down.
We'll sit, we'll talk a little bit.

This is wonderful.

So what are you
two guys talking about?

To tell you the truth,
he has some crazy...

Oh, you know Tanaka,

the Japanese guy,
his son tried to kill himself.

But he's home
from the hospital.

- He didn't die.
- Oh yeah, good guy...

- No no, "die."
- Lie?

No, "die."

Die, die, die!

You're back.

- I am back, as promised.
- I'm glad.

I gotta tell you something.
The doctor was upset.

Doctors don't like
to have their authority questioned.

I told him I had to go
with the pharmacist, you know?

We see a lot of drugs.
I think this is a good choice.

Is that your name?

Cofey?

Yeah.

Have you ever been
to that Japanese restaurant

- across the street?
- Oh yeah, eat there all the time.

So Cofey was there.

You could say that.

You know what, Cofey?

I think I'll go
with the doctor.

Are you gonna try
some of this eel?

You know, if you wanna taste
my chicken teriyaki,

you don't have to go
through this charade

of offering me the eel, whatever.
Just ask me.

I don't want your chicken teriyaki,
but thank you.

I know that you do.
Here, take a piece.

Here, on me.

Oh, I forgot to tell you,
I was in the pharmacy...

Remember the other day
when we were in here and I saw

- "Cofey was here" on the table?
- Mmm-hmm.

- Remember that?
- Yeah.

The pharmacist had a nametag
that said "Cofey."

- Really?
- Yeah.

What is this with the Blackberry every...
all the time now?

It's really
getting annoying.

I was listening.
I'm meeting Wanda...

All you do all day long
is this Blackberry thing.

She was gonna tell me
when her break was. I'm gonna visit her.

- You're supposed to be talking to me.
- L...

- We're having lunch, you know.
- L... the coffee.

All right, I'm going
to the bathroom.

Okay.

Chicken teriyaki boy!

Chicken! Chicken!

Stop it!

Yoshi! Yoshi!

- Chicken teriyaki boy!
- That's just great.

Cofey is here!

- Cofey is here!
- Cofey is here!

- Cofey is here!
- Cofey!

Cofey!

Hey!

You told everyone in the restaurant
that Yoshi was a chicken.

I'm chicken teriyaki boy.

That's my nickname,
'cause I always order chicken teriyaki.

So whenever I go in, they go,
"Oh, chicken teriyaki boy!"

- And they call you that.
- Yes, that's my name.

- What's going on?
- What's my name in this place?

- Chicken teriyaki boy.
- I'm chicken teriyaki boy.

- Nobody has that kind of nickname.
- And I kept up

my end of the bargain so fork over
the money you owe me.

- No, you have not.
- What? I apologized.

He said you were eating
something on the phone.

You're not allowed to eat pistachio nuts
when you apologize?

By the way, were they
with shells or without?

They had shells.

- Okay, so you had to de-shell.
- So you're not paying up?

You have not apologized
to Yoshi properly.

It's better not to eat
when you apologize.

I'll tell you what.
Let's go double or nothing. Bingo.

You wanna take me on
in bingo?

- Tomorrow, the nursing home, 2:00.
- 2:00.

- Yeah, bingo, that's right.
- Tomorrow. Double or nothing.

Which way you wanna lose?
Horizontal, vertical or diagonal?

- You have no idea. Don't be late.
- Don't worry, I won't.

We'll see.

Oh no!

Suicide Blackberry.

- Bingo!
- Oh, all right, Alice.

I'll be right there
to check you out.

- Shove over.
- Jeez, you shouldn't be here.

- What?
- You shouldn't be here.

- Hand me one of your cards.
- All right, take it.

- You're late.
- I'm here.

- You're late.
- Yeah.

All right, everybody.
Are we ready to start another game?

Nobody beats me at bingo. Nobody!

Really? I haven't read
about that.

Shh.

B-4.

- "B" what?
- B-4. Oh, good start!

- B-4.
- Four.

I don't have four.
Wait I have...

B-11.

B-11.

11. 11.

Ahem.

O-69.

- O-69.
- Okay.

O-62.

Bingo!

Bingo!

Bingo!

Bingo!

That's him.

He's the one that tried
to kill Ruthie.

Huh?

- Yes.
- What? What?

Hey hey hey hey, wait wait wait,
calm down here.

No, that's ridiculous.
I didn't try to kill her.

Hey, seriously,
come on.

Why would I do that?

Oh, I know what you mean.
No, 'cause I was talking to my father...

he's a little deaf,
so I have to scream.

I was saying,
"Die, die."

Kev, come on,
back me up here.

Kev! Help me out!

Tell them!
Kev?

Wait a second.

Sorry about the bingo game.

I really did win!
I have bingo!

I have money!
Here!

Here, take it.
Take it all.

Take it, take it, take...

Banzai!