All language subtitles for 121 - The Bridge of Lions Affair, Part 21

[SALEM SIGHS]

[WHISTLING]

Whoa, did you just sigh,
or are you sitting on an accordion?

- I think I see a gray hair.
- What?

Darn, you know,
I knew this job would age me.

You know, I am two weeks away
from a blue rinse and bunion pads.

The gray hair is on me.

Don't you think of anyone
besides yourself?

Of course I do. Right now,
I'm thinking of Daniel Bedingfield.

I'm doing the cover story on him
for this issue of Scorch magazine.

Do you know
what a big responsibility this is?

Wow, you've never had
a cover before.

Except for that phony Time Magazine
one you got at the county fair.

Hey, I learned to ride a two-wheeler.
I totally deserved woman of the year.

- Hey.
- Sorry, I'm in a rush.

The radio station's general manager
is in town.

Okay, this time no matter how good
the toupee looks, do not ask if it's new.

Hey, I was doing him a favor.
There was a price tag hanging off of it.

Sabrina,
will you open my mail for me?

I sent my fashion portfolio
to LaRue magazine,

and I am too nervous
to read their response.

Look at these stamps.

I don't think they'd spend
three 97 on a rejection letter.

Yes. Goody, goody, goody.

Unless they're sending back
your portfolio.

Baddy, baddy, baddy.

Hey, Morgan, these are really good.

Okay, it says here
that they like your stuff,

they just want you come back
when you've had more experience.

That's why I hate careers.

It was so much easier
getting experience with boys.

See you, guys.

Seriously, Morgan,
you're gonna find work soon. I know it.

Thanks. Okay, I feel better.

It is so great to have roommates
who think I'm talented.

- You are.
- And beautiful.

- Absolutely.
- And smart.

Oh, is that a gray hair on Salem?

Oh.

[WHISTLING]

What are you so happy about?

Well, let's see. I got here early.

I found a great parking spot.

And the guy at the coffee stand
didn't call me, "Peaches."

So it has nothing to do with you
getting the cover story?

Oh, are you upset about that?

No, of course not.

It's just, you know,
doing a cover's a big responsibility.

I should know,
I've written too many to count. Ha, ha.

Nine of the last 13.

Well, I got this cover.

- Sabrina, you lost the cover.
- What?

Well, make that ten of, uh, 14.

But I'll let you proof read it, Peaches.

Unh, Annie, Annie,
you can't take this story from me.

I already told my cat.

I'm sorry.
I just heard from the designer.

He refuses
to dress Daniel Bedingfield.

- Why?
- I don't know.

- Maybe he doesn't like the British.
- Who doesn't?

You know, sure, they used to have
a Navy and attack people all the time.

But now they just make tea and jam
and long boring movies.

I'm sorry. No designer, no cover.

You see, the problem is, Boston's
not really known for its designers.

Except for the dude who invented
the tri-corner hat.

Wait, wait,
what about Morgan Cavenaugh?

- Who?
- Morgan Cavanaugh, my friend.

Oh, well, in that case, no.

But you haven't even
seen her portfolio.

Maybe I shouldn't inhale
when I use that hairspray.

I just happen to have
Morgan's portfolio right here. Ha, ha.

I'm telling you,
she is hot, hot, hot right now.

I mean,
LaRue magazine just contacted her.

It's not bad, but I hate to give the cover
to someone I've never heard of.

Come on, you never heard of me.

Well, that's not your best argument.

Annie, I tell you, she's really good.

Hmm, guess I don't have much
of a choice. I'm desperate.

Oh, she's gonna be so happy
to hear that.

Well, I might edit it a little.

Salem. You're dying your hair?

I'm just putting in some low-lights.

Oh, I had no idea
they made a "Just for Cats."

I had no idea
how many shades of black there were.

I finally went with ultimate goulet.

Hi, Sabrina.

Oh, what is going on with the cat?

Oh, that, well, uh, I am not gonna color
my hair without practicing first.

Oh, great idea.

Later, I think I'll try my new home
bikini waxer on him.

[GASPS]

Listen, Morgan, I've got great news.

Oh, you found my briefcase.

Yeah, uh, when I took it to work
by mistake, lucky for you,

guess what Bedingfield's
gonna be wearing

on the cover of Scorch magazine?

Well, he's British so...

Oh, Lederhosen.

No, he's wearing Morganwear.

I showed Annie your portfolio
and got you the job.

You're kidding?

Annie really wants me
to style the cover?

Wants? She said it herself.

She's desperate.

Oh, my God, Sabrina, thank you
so much for doing this for me.

- What's going on?
- Roxie, great news.

I am going to be styling
Daniel Bedingfield

for the cover of Scorch magazine.

Good for you, at least things
are going well for you guys.

Oh, they really are, thanks.

Hold it, Morgan.
Roxie, what happened?

My station manager
isn't happy with my show.

He said he's tired of girl talk.

Whoa, that's awful.

Here I get this great news

and then you come in
and just bring us down.

Morgan.
Look, it's not the end of the world.

You could just change
the format of your show.

You know, instead of girl talk,
it could be guy talk.

You know like, uh,
"That's a big one, Mark."

"Yeah, you totally blew that carburetor,
Pete."

I thought people loved my show.
You guys like it, right?

Of course we do.
We listen to it every night.

Well, sure, but mostly with the sound
turned down so I can hear Conan.

Don't listen to her. We're huge fans.

What would you have told that woman
last night from Framingham?

Oh, well, I would have told her
to dump that loser.

Her husband just died.

Oh, well,
then all the more reason to let go.

There are things you could do with
the radio show. You could do music...

I want my show to remain a place

where women
can express themselves.

Then you better get some
good-Iooking guys on your show.

Why don't you go wax the cat?

[MOUTHS]
Oh, yes.

I don't know, maybe I should think
about doing something else.

No, Roxie, your show is great.

You know, but maybe
there's something to that music idea.

You know, maybe you could
mix your message with live music.

Live music, that's a great idea.
Thanks, Sabrina.

[CATERWAULS]

What was that?

The sound of a cat
who's gonna look good in a bikini.

Oh, I'm sure Morgan
will be here any minute now.

She's in the fashion business,
so she's fashionably late. Ha, ha.

Any minute now.

- I don't like waiting.
JAMES: Me, neither.

I once dumped a girl
for making me wait.

After two hours,
I just paid the minister,

sent the guests home and took
the maid of honor on a honeymoon.

Annie, you know if you need it, you
can use, uh, my story as the cover.

Whoa, back in your tree limb, vulture,
this one isn't dead yet.

No, seriously, I'm doing that interview
with Ozzy Osbourne tomorrow.

The only thing is, I gotta figure out
what time, uh... o'clock is.

If I know Morgan, she's just taking
a few extra seconds to...

You know, prepare herself
for a professional presentation.

[HONKING]

Hey, quit your honking,
we're not going anywhere.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Hello?

You were to be here 20 minutes ago.
Where are you?

Duh, shopping.

I wanted to look good
for this meeting.

Well, get here now.

I can't go any faster.

Oh, yes, you can.

[TIRES SCREECHING]

Whoa, this car goes fast.

Look, I can't wait any longer.
Cole, let's run your story.

[TIRES SCREECH
THEN CAR CRASHES]

Wait, she's here.

Hi.

- Am I late?
- Whoa, rad do.

Thanks. Rad do to you too.

Don't worry, she won't be doing hair.

Okay, I have so many great ideas
for this cover.

I want to put Daniel in something
that makes a bold statement.

You want something bold?
Try showing up on time.

Unh, that is so done.

Okay, I gotta go get started
on this article.

You know, this cover
is a big break for me too.

If I do well,
Annie might stop calling me the temp.

Hey,
does Salem look different to you?

[CLEARS THROAT]

No, he looks exactly the same.

Maybe he's facing a different way.

What have you done?

I figured the dye job wasn't enough
to make me look younger,

so for 5 bucks they threw in
a little collagen.

A little?

It looks like you made out
with a beehive.

[GRUNTS]

Roxie, if you don't mind, I'm gonna
borrow your Daniel Bedingfield CD.

Sure. You have a minute? I'm working
on a song and like to run it by you.

Oh, well, okay.

[SINGING]
Boston ladies sing this song

Doo-dah, doo-dah

We get paid less for the same job

- You think this is good?
- Well, no, but I think...

So, what do you think?

Oh, it's great.

Roxie, they say that everyone
is given a special gift.

If music is yours,
I hope you saved the receipt.

Oh, Rox, don't listen to her, uh.
What does she know about music?

She thought B flat was a bra size.

So you really like it?

Yeah, it's fantastic.

I wish I could listen to the rest,
but I gotta go prepare for this interview.

But keep it up.

Healthy people don't eat meat

Daniel's only gonna give me
a little bit of time.

I have to boil this down
to the best 75 questions.

Now, do you think it's possible
to be over-prepared?

Oh, good one. Seventy-six.

All right, I figured we would set up
with the bakery in the background.

- That cool with you?
- I see what you're going for.

Interesting light,
kind of a European feel?

No. There's an outlet there.

Hey, is Daniel here yet?

Yeah, he's in your office with Morgan.
She's putting together his look.

There is a naked rock star in my office
and I'm not there?

I hate what I've become.

Oh, Annie, I know that this cover story
is an awesome opportunity,

I hope it'll inspire you to give me
more responsibility...

Did you hear me?
There is a naked rock star in my office.

Ladies and gentlemen,
I present Daniel Bedingfield.

- Well, what do you think?
- Oh, my gosh, it's awful.

- What do we do?
- We do nothing.

You want more responsibility,
fire your friend.

[CHUCKLES]

- Listen, Morgan.
- Did you see those people?

I stunned them.

I totally get what you mean
about Annie.

I am too important
to give a compliment.

I mean, you think somebody
is maybe a little intimidated

by something called talent?

You know, you're right.

And that's probably why
she's insisting on

going a different way with the cover.

Really, well, which way
does she want me to go?

- Uh, that way.
- What?

You lost the job, Morgan.

Annie doesn't wanna use
your design.

Why not?

I mean, that is a great look.

- You liked it, right?
- Me?

Well, I thought it was great.

I mean, I told Annie
she's making a big mistake.

I should go talk to her.

No, no, no. You know, it's pointless.

Once Annie makes her decision,
there's no swaying her.

I mean, she still holds on
to her Enron stock.

What about Daniel?

I mean, doesn't he have a say
in any of this?

Freaking crazy chick.

Got me decked out like a showgirl.

Oh, Daniel, where are you going?

To find a pub.

I need a pint
to wash down these feathers.

Daniel, please wait. Oh, Morgan...

Who do you think you are
to judge my fashion?

Okay, wait, wait, first of all, let's not
confuse fashion with poultry, okay?

And second, it isn't just me.

Even Sabrina said your outfit stunk.

You said that?

You told me you liked it.

Well, I...

- Oh!
- Morgan.

I can't believe you told that
to her face.

At least I had the decency
to trash her behind her back.

Daniel, I know this is
the tenth message I've left you,

but your voice mail only gives me
15 seconds to talk.

I want to do the interview with you
and I think you looked cute in the fea...

Ers, feathers.
Okay, all right, call me back.

My number is on second
and third message.

What happened to you?
You get stuck in a bicycle chain?

Nothing happened.

I'm just being the young,
hip cat that I am.

Oh, speaking of which,
how is your hip?

Uh, I have my good days
and my bad days.

[DOOR CLICKS OPEN]

Morgan, wait. I can explain.

Oh, really?

I wouldn't know
which of your two faces to listen to.

What do you mean?

You told me that you liked my design
for Daniel Bedingfield

and you told Annie that you don't.

You told Roxie you liked her song,
and you told me that you didn't.

That makes you two-faced.

So you better face it.

Twice.

I am not two-faced.

SABRINA 2:
Yeah, right.

Salem, are you talking to someone?

SABRINA 2: What are you asking
the geezer for? He can't hear anything.

What the?

- Howdy.
- What's going on?

You're a witch.
You should know about this.

If a witch denies the truth,
she's forced to confront it.

What? But, I was just trying
to spare Morgan and Roxie's feelings.

That doesn't make me two-faced.

No, I make you two-faced.

Hey,
don't make me come back there.

Morgan, open the door.
I really wanna talk to you.

MORGAN:
Well, I don't wanna talk to you.

I like your design for Daniel.
I really do.

SABRINA 2:
Please.

That outfit looked like something
San Diego Chicken wore to the prom.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Hello? Oh, hi, Daniel.

Oh, don't worry about Morgan.

She's a professional,
she completely understands.

Yeah, she's sobbing because
the bathroom light is so unflattering.

Uh, thanks for calling.

[SABRINA 2 MUMBLES]

Um, really. That's great.

Okay, yeah,
I'll meet you back at the office.

I know, I know, five minutes
is all it's gonna take.

Oh, thank you, you are the best.

You're the best,

oh, if I ever sound that phony,
just run backwards into the wall.

[CHUCKLES]

- Who's that?
SALEM: Her name's Friskie.

And believe me, she is.

Oh, Salem. Come on, a trophy kitty?

That's right.

And by the way, don't come a-knocking
if the trash can's a-rocking.

Gotta go. Be sure to catch my show.

Oh, what's with the guitar?

Well, you came up
with that great idea for live music,

so I taught myself guitar.

I'm gonna sing my own songs.

SABRINA 2:
Oh, dear God.

Uh, oh, you're gonna sing
on the radio?

Thanks to you.
You probably saved my show.

You're a true friend.

Uh, Roxie, wait.

Ow.

Hey, no biting.

Daniel, thanks so much
for coming back for this interview.

I've got about five minutes.
I'm going to a gig.

- Oh, you're performing tonight?
- Not me.

This friend of mine.
He's got a one-man show.

And I've seen him act.
It's gonna be a one-man audience too.

So, what are you gonna say to him?

Hmm, the same thing I say
every single time I see him act.

"Nigel, you're dreadful."

- You say that to him?
- Yeah, he's my best friend.

What good would I be
if I didn't tell him the truth?

- Not good at all.
- Hmm, so interview?

Actually, instead of the interview,

would you sing
on my friend's radio show?

- I can't...
- You don't understand.

If you don't, she's gonna sing
one of her originals.

And the truth is, as a singer,

she's a musical version
of your friend Nigel.

- Horrible, huh?
- Well, I wouldn't say horrible...

SABRINA 2:
I would.

- So will you do it?
- I just don't know if I have time.

Sure you do.
The radio station is, uh, right upstairs.

- Come on.
- Oh.

Oh, uh, hey, Cole?

- Can you still do that cover story?
- Really?

I have more important things
to take care of.

Yeah, sure. I'll give Ozzy a call.

[ELEVATOR BELL RINGS]

You know,
I can swear that was a bakery.

Oh, and tomorrow it'll be a butcher
and then a candlestick maker.

Hey, that's America.

How long has the elevator
been there?

Oh, save the chitchat
for the beauty salon.

Now, move along.

And then she stabbed me
in the back.

- You would never lie, would you?
- No.

Morgan, I'm really sorry about this
but I'm on the air in 30 seconds.

Roxie, babe,
you're on in one minute.

You lied to me too.

Morgan, we're all friends.
You, me, Sabrina.

Sabrina is not your friend, my friend.
Not like me.

I told you right up front
that your song sucks.

Okay, I know you don't get my song,
but Sabrina said she liked it.

And she's in the music business.
I think I can trust her.

- Roxie, don't sing, your song sucks.
- What?

I'm sorry,
I don't wanna hurt your feelings,

but isn't it worse if I lie to you?

Not at this point. We're on the air.

Hey, we got a show to do, all right?

If you girls wanna fight,
you can do it in my van later.

I appreciate your honesty,
but you've ruined my show.

I promised my listeners live music.

They'll get it.
I brought Daniel Bedingfield with me.

Daniel.

Oh, my God.
You brought Daniel Bedingfield.

And he doesn't have a lot of time.
So move.

And now, live from Roxie's show,
here's Daniel Bedingfield.

This is a really nice gesture,

but we still have something to discuss,
like, my song sucks?

Roxie, I only said I liked your song
because I was trying to be your friend.

But a true friend wouldn't do that.
I want you to be my Nigel.

Okay, who's Nigel?

It's a long British story, the point is,
if we're gonna be friends,

then we always have to be honest
with each other, right?

Right?

I guess you're right.

And, Morgan,
I owe you an apology too.

Yes, you do.

There was nothing wrong
with Daniel's outfit.

It just takes a certain kind of person
to pull off feathers.

Yeah, a chicken plucker.
Look, Morgan, I'm sorry.

I think you're a great designer,

but I should have been
upfront with you.

Daniel's outfit was awful.

Whew, you know,
it feels good to be honest.

Well, as long as we're being honest,

you know
that carrot cake you made last week,

that Roxie and I were raving about?

Stinko.

Great, good.

And your pecan sandies?

They taste like you actually
make them with sand.

- Okay. Glad you told me.
- I see what you're saying.

In the long run, being honest
is gonna make our friendship stronger.

And, Sabrina, sometimes you go
a little heavy on the eyeliner.

Oh, and that blue shirt
with the silver...

Okay, enough.

Friends don't let friends
get too friendly.

Hey. Where's Friskie?

Uh, she was just using me.

Typical gold digger.

She wanted a Tiffany collar.

She would only eat
out of the best bowls.

You know, with that age difference,
it's a matter of time

before you're sleeping
on separate windowsills,

each in your own ray of sunlight.

Hey, I don't need a little sex kitten
around to make me feel young.

Good for you.
You wanna watch some TV?

What, are you crazy? It's 8:30.

I'm going to bed.

[SOBS]

Night, pops.