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1
00:00:35,766 --> 00:00:36,599
Run!
2
00:00:39,645 --> 00:00:41,229
Morty, do it!
Hit the button now!
3
00:00:41,313 --> 00:00:42,272
I can't do it, Rick!
4
00:00:42,356 --> 00:00:43,648
They're my parents and sister!
5
00:00:43,732 --> 00:00:45,108
Morty, I already told you...
it's not your family!
6
00:00:45,192 --> 00:00:47,068
They're clones from
an alternate reality,
7
00:00:47,152 --> 00:00:48,736
possessed by demonic alien
spirits from another
8
00:00:48,821 --> 00:00:49,904
dimension's future!
9
00:00:49,989 --> 00:00:51,364
Do you need a mnemonic
device or something?
10
00:00:51,448 --> 00:00:52,657
Just hit the button, already!
11
00:00:54,159 --> 00:00:57,120
Morty, please,
I love you, sweetheart.
12
00:00:57,204 --> 00:00:58,496
Oh!
13
00:01:04,920 --> 00:01:06,504
Good work, Morty.
14
00:01:06,589 --> 00:01:10,717
You know, th-th-these demonic
alien spirits are really valuable.
15
00:01:10,801 --> 00:01:12,010
You okay, Morty?
16
00:01:12,094 --> 00:01:14,053
I told you not to
trust that tuna.
17
00:01:14,138 --> 00:01:15,513
I just killed my family!
18
00:01:15,598 --> 00:01:16,639
I don't care what they were.
19
00:01:16,724 --> 00:01:17,849
I don't know, Morty.
20
00:01:17,933 --> 00:01:19,309
Some people'd pay top dollar
for that kind of breakthrough.
21
00:01:19,393 --> 00:01:20,351
You know what, Rick?
22
00:01:20,436 --> 00:01:21,519
That's it!
23
00:01:21,604 --> 00:01:23,146
I'm done with these
insane adventures!
24
00:01:23,230 --> 00:01:25,398
That was really traumatizing!
I quit! I'm out!
25
00:01:25,482 --> 00:01:26,983
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
26
00:01:27,067 --> 00:01:28,901
Come on, Morty, don't...
don't... don't be like that.
27
00:01:28,986 --> 00:01:30,570
The Universe is a crazy,
chaotic place.
28
00:01:30,654 --> 00:01:31,946
You're the one that's
crazy and chaotic!
29
00:01:32,031 --> 00:01:34,240
Adventures are supposed
to be simple and fun.
30
00:01:34,325 --> 00:01:35,241
Oh, yeah, Morty, yeah.
31
00:01:35,326 --> 00:01:36,409
Yeah, that... that... that's
32
00:01:36,493 --> 00:01:38,411
real easy to say from the
sidekick position.
33
00:01:38,495 --> 00:01:40,455
But... but, uh, how about
next time you be in charge,
34
00:01:40,539 --> 00:01:42,540
and then we'll talk about
how simple and fun it is?
35
00:01:42,625 --> 00:01:43,833
Seriously, Rick?
36
00:01:43,917 --> 00:01:45,960
Y-y-you'll... you'll
let me call the shots?
37
00:01:46,045 --> 00:01:47,253
Okay, yeah, fine.
38
00:01:47,338 --> 00:01:48,713
But let's make it interesting,
Morty.
39
00:01:48,797 --> 00:01:51,883
I-I-I-If your adventure sucks
and we bail halfway through it,
40
00:01:51,967 --> 00:01:54,427
you lose the right to bitch
about all future adventures.
41
00:01:54,511 --> 00:01:56,304
Plus, you have to do
my laundry for a month.
42
00:01:56,388 --> 00:01:57,597
Okay, all right,
tough guy!
43
00:01:57,681 --> 00:01:58,848
But if my adventure's good,
44
00:01:58,932 --> 00:02:00,350
I get to be in charge of
every third adventure!
45
00:02:00,434 --> 00:02:01,351
Every 10th.
46
00:02:01,435 --> 00:02:02,352
Deal. All right.
47
00:02:02,436 --> 00:02:03,603
W-well, come on,
let's get going.
48
00:02:03,687 --> 00:02:05,605
Dad, the dishwasher's
doing that thing again.
49
00:02:05,689 --> 00:02:06,522
Washing dishes?
50
00:02:06,607 --> 00:02:07,440
No. The opposite.
51
00:02:07,524 --> 00:02:08,816
Can you fix it?
52
00:02:08,901 --> 00:02:10,485
Grandpa Rick, can you help me
with my science homework?
53
00:02:10,569 --> 00:02:11,486
Yeah... j-just don't do it.
54
00:02:11,570 --> 00:02:12,862
Grandpa!
55
00:02:12,946 --> 00:02:15,823
Hey, Rick, you got some kind of
hand-shaped device that can open
56
00:02:15,908 --> 00:02:16,949
this mayonnaise jar?
57
00:02:17,034 --> 00:02:18,201
Wow. Hat trick.
58
00:02:18,285 --> 00:02:19,327
All right, Morty,
let's put a pin in this.
59
00:02:19,411 --> 00:02:20,620
I got to help your
pathetic family.
60
00:02:20,704 --> 00:02:22,622
Oh, that sounds like
something a chicken would say.
61
00:02:22,706 --> 00:02:24,540
Bawk, bawk, bawk,
bawk, bawk, bawk.
62
00:02:24,625 --> 00:02:25,708
Oh, Morty, you done
did it this time.
63
00:02:25,793 --> 00:02:27,168
It's on.
64
00:02:27,252 --> 00:02:29,295
I can't wait to watch your
adventure lay a huge fart.
65
00:02:29,380 --> 00:02:31,047
As for you dingdongs...
66
00:02:31,882 --> 00:02:33,132
This is a Meeseeks Box.
67
00:02:33,217 --> 00:02:34,258
Let me show you how it works.
68
00:02:34,343 --> 00:02:35,218
You press this.
69
00:02:35,302 --> 00:02:37,011
I'm Mr. Meeseeks!
70
00:02:37,096 --> 00:02:38,096
Look at me!
71
00:02:38,180 --> 00:02:39,472
You make a request.
72
00:02:39,556 --> 00:02:41,474
Mr. Meeseeks, open Jerry's
stupid mayonnaise jar.
73
00:02:41,558 --> 00:02:42,975
Yes, siree!
74
00:02:43,060 --> 00:02:44,519
The Meeseeks fulfills
the request.
75
00:02:44,603 --> 00:02:45,895
All done!
76
00:02:45,979 --> 00:02:47,063
Wow!
77
00:02:47,147 --> 00:02:48,523
And then it stops existing.
78
00:02:48,607 --> 00:02:50,108
Oh, my God, he exploded!
79
00:02:50,192 --> 00:02:51,275
Trust me, they're fine with it.
80
00:02:51,360 --> 00:02:52,527
Knock yourselves out...
81
00:02:52,611 --> 00:02:54,320
Just keep
your requests simple.
82
00:02:54,405 --> 00:02:55,279
They're not gods.
83
00:02:55,364 --> 00:02:56,489
All right!
84
00:02:56,573 --> 00:02:57,782
G-get out of here now!
Everybody out of here!
85
00:02:57,866 --> 00:02:59,325
I got a bet to win!
86
00:03:00,661 --> 00:03:02,036
So many possibilities.
87
00:03:02,121 --> 00:03:03,329
My mind is racing.
88
00:03:03,414 --> 00:03:04,497
If we're gonna
use this thing,
89
00:03:04,581 --> 00:03:05,790
which I'm not even
sure we should,
90
00:03:05,874 --> 00:03:06,791
we need to keep it simp...
91
00:03:06,875 --> 00:03:08,251
I'm Mr. Meeseeks!
92
00:03:08,335 --> 00:03:09,377
I want to be
popular at school!
93
00:03:09,461 --> 00:03:10,753
Ooh, okay!
94
00:03:10,838 --> 00:03:12,296
Summer, what did I just...
95
00:03:12,381 --> 00:03:14,340
Ooh, I'm Mr. Meeseeks!
Look at me!
96
00:03:14,425 --> 00:03:15,842
I-I-I want... I want to
be a more complete woman!
97
00:03:15,926 --> 00:03:16,759
Beth!
98
00:03:16,844 --> 00:03:18,845
Oh, yeah! Yes, ma'am!
99
00:03:18,929 --> 00:03:21,389
You guys are doing it wrong.
100
00:03:21,473 --> 00:03:24,392
He said "Simple."
101
00:03:24,476 --> 00:03:26,811
Hey, there.
I'm Mr. Meeseeks!
102
00:03:28,188 --> 00:03:30,064
Mr. Meeseeks,
I would like to take
103
00:03:30,149 --> 00:03:31,816
two strokes off my golf game.
104
00:03:31,900 --> 00:03:35,570
Ooh, yeah! Can do!
105
00:03:35,654 --> 00:03:36,863
Nailed it.
106
00:03:36,947 --> 00:03:39,157
God, Morty, what a boring
start to an adventure.
107
00:03:39,241 --> 00:03:41,534
I don't... w-w-w-why didn't we
just go to Kentucky?
108
00:03:41,618 --> 00:03:43,828
Rick, this is a fantasy-type
world with creatures
109
00:03:43,912 --> 00:03:45,538
and all sorts of
fantasy things.
110
00:03:45,622 --> 00:03:46,956
W-we're going on a quest, okay?
111
00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:49,375
Can't wait.
112
00:03:49,460 --> 00:03:51,127
Ahem. Excuse me!
113
00:03:51,211 --> 00:03:54,922
We are two humble heroes
in search of adventure!
114
00:03:55,007 --> 00:03:56,215
Oh, my God, so embarrassing.
115
00:03:56,300 --> 00:03:57,884
At last! Two heroes!
116
00:03:57,968 --> 00:03:59,385
You must help us!
117
00:03:59,470 --> 00:04:02,722
This village is terribly poor,
yet the giant that lives in the
118
00:04:02,806 --> 00:04:04,766
clouds above has
untold treasures!
119
00:04:04,850 --> 00:04:06,225
You know what?
120
00:04:06,310 --> 00:04:09,812
I-I-I accept your call to
adventure, good sir, kind sir.
121
00:04:09,897 --> 00:04:11,147
Come on, Rick.
122
00:04:11,231 --> 00:04:12,482
There's a giant
in the clouds!
123
00:04:12,566 --> 00:04:13,441
Yeah.
124
00:04:13,525 --> 00:04:14,942
Beginner's luck.
125
00:04:15,027 --> 00:04:18,780
In conclusion, a friendship
with Summer Smith is the most
126
00:04:18,864 --> 00:04:22,408
valuable and enriching
experience of your young lives.
127
00:04:23,535 --> 00:04:24,744
I'm Mr. Meeseeks!
128
00:04:24,828 --> 00:04:26,078
Look at me!
129
00:04:26,163 --> 00:04:26,996
Thank you!
130
00:04:27,080 --> 00:04:28,456
Uh, Mr. Meeseeks, was it?
131
00:04:28,540 --> 00:04:29,749
Yeah. Gene Vagina.
132
00:04:29,833 --> 00:04:32,835
Listen, I'm in a bit of custody
thing with my ex and was wondering...
133
00:04:32,920 --> 00:04:34,253
No, I'll G... I'll get
your info from Summer.
134
00:04:35,547 --> 00:04:37,048
I got pregnant at 17.
135
00:04:37,132 --> 00:04:39,050
I mean, I still put myself
through Veterinary School.
136
00:04:39,134 --> 00:04:44,764
Yes, I'm successful,
but what if I hadn't...
137
00:04:44,848 --> 00:04:48,351
I'm just saying,
somewhere along the way,
138
00:04:48,435 --> 00:04:51,395
I lost that wide-eyed
girl from Muskegon.
139
00:04:51,480 --> 00:04:53,481
She's still there, Beth.
140
00:04:53,565 --> 00:04:54,857
Well, her waistline isn't.
141
00:04:56,777 --> 00:04:59,403
Beth, having a family
doesn't mean that you
142
00:04:59,488 --> 00:05:01,739
stop being an individual.
143
00:05:01,824 --> 00:05:02,782
You know the best
thing you can
144
00:05:02,866 --> 00:05:04,951
do for people that
depend on you?
145
00:05:05,035 --> 00:05:09,163
Be honest with them, even if
it means setting them free.
146
00:05:09,248 --> 00:05:12,375
You're saying I
should leave Jerry.
147
00:05:12,459 --> 00:05:16,963
I can't believe I'm finally
having this conversation.
148
00:05:25,347 --> 00:05:26,138
More wine?
149
00:05:27,140 --> 00:05:28,516
I think I've had enough.
150
00:05:33,730 --> 00:05:36,232
Remember to square your
shoulders, Jerry.
151
00:05:36,316 --> 00:05:38,025
Yeah, yeah. I got it.
152
00:05:42,614 --> 00:05:43,656
That's okay.
153
00:05:43,740 --> 00:05:45,491
I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me!
154
00:05:45,576 --> 00:05:47,410
Try again and
keep your head down.
155
00:05:47,494 --> 00:05:48,661
Okay, well, which is it?
156
00:05:48,745 --> 00:05:50,121
Square my shoulders
or keep my head down?
157
00:05:50,205 --> 00:05:51,664
Well, it's both.
158
00:05:51,748 --> 00:05:54,417
But most importantly,
you got to relax.
159
00:05:54,501 --> 00:05:55,585
You know what, Mr. Meeseeks?
160
00:05:55,669 --> 00:05:56,586
I don't think this is working.
161
00:05:56,670 --> 00:05:58,004
I give up.
162
00:05:58,088 --> 00:06:00,423
I'm sorry, Jerry,
but it doesn't work like that.
163
00:06:00,507 --> 00:06:01,799
I'm Mr. Meeseeks.
164
00:06:01,884 --> 00:06:04,677
I have to fulfill my
purpose so I can go away.
165
00:06:04,761 --> 00:06:05,845
Look at me.
166
00:06:05,929 --> 00:06:07,889
Well, make yourself comfortable,
because I suck.
167
00:06:07,973 --> 00:06:10,850
No, Jerry, I'm the one who
sucks!
168
00:06:10,934 --> 00:06:12,685
Let me try something.
169
00:06:12,769 --> 00:06:13,978
I'm Mr. Meeseeks!
170
00:06:14,062 --> 00:06:14,979
Look at me!
171
00:06:15,063 --> 00:06:15,980
Hi, Mr. Meeseeks!
172
00:06:16,064 --> 00:06:16,981
I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me.
173
00:06:17,065 --> 00:06:18,482
Hi!
174
00:06:18,567 --> 00:06:20,735
Can you help me get two strokes
off of Jerry's golf swing?
175
00:06:20,819 --> 00:06:22,236
Can do!
176
00:06:22,321 --> 00:06:23,738
I'm Mr. Meeseeks!
177
00:06:23,822 --> 00:06:25,531
Is he keeping his
shoulders squared?
178
00:06:25,616 --> 00:06:27,325
Ooh, he's trying!
179
00:06:33,206 --> 00:06:34,457
All right, Morty.
180
00:06:34,541 --> 00:06:36,459
W-w-we're in your
stupid giant's castle.
181
00:06:36,543 --> 00:06:37,501
W-what do we do next?
182
00:06:37,586 --> 00:06:38,669
Would you just relax, Rick?
183
00:06:38,754 --> 00:06:40,212
All we got to do is find
the treasure room, okay?
184
00:06:40,297 --> 00:06:41,714
It's nice and simple.
185
00:06:41,798 --> 00:06:43,466
You know, I-I-I'm sorry
everything's going so
186
00:06:43,550 --> 00:06:44,926
smoothly and adventurously.
187
00:06:47,596 --> 00:06:48,471
Uh-oh, Morty.
188
00:06:48,555 --> 00:06:49,722
Startin' to get a little hairy.
189
00:06:49,806 --> 00:06:50,890
What do you want to do, boss?
190
00:06:50,974 --> 00:06:51,807
Come on, hurry.
191
00:06:51,892 --> 00:06:52,934
Behind this cookie jar.
192
00:06:53,018 --> 00:06:56,604
Fee! Fi! Fo! Fum!
193
00:06:56,688 --> 00:06:58,147
Just give up, Morty.
194
00:06:58,231 --> 00:06:59,398
J-J-J... this is game over.
195
00:06:59,483 --> 00:07:00,608
I'll take us home right now.
196
00:07:00,692 --> 00:07:01,567
You just say the word.
197
00:07:01,652 --> 00:07:02,485
No way, Rick.
198
00:07:02,569 --> 00:07:03,611
This is all part of it.
199
00:07:03,695 --> 00:07:05,613
Adventures have conflict.
Deal with it.
200
00:07:05,697 --> 00:07:07,865
I smell the blood of...
whoop!
201
00:07:08,951 --> 00:07:09,867
Holy crap.
202
00:07:09,952 --> 00:07:10,910
Oh, boy.
203
00:07:10,994 --> 00:07:12,286
He looks pretty
bad down there, Morty.
204
00:07:12,371 --> 00:07:14,497
Looks like he's
bleeding out.
205
00:07:14,581 --> 00:07:16,707
Oh, Jesus! Dale!
206
00:07:16,792 --> 00:07:18,626
You sons of bitches!
207
00:07:18,710 --> 00:07:19,877
- Oh, man.
- Uh-oh.
208
00:07:19,962 --> 00:07:21,212
Hello, 911?
209
00:07:21,296 --> 00:07:23,005
My husband has been
attacked by tiny people!
210
00:07:23,090 --> 00:07:23,923
He's dying!
211
00:07:26,468 --> 00:07:28,094
Hey, look, we get it.
212
00:07:28,178 --> 00:07:29,512
You're little, you're down
on your luck, you think,
213
00:07:29,596 --> 00:07:30,972
"Hey, he's a giant.
214
00:07:31,056 --> 00:07:32,974
Why don't we break into his
home, rob him, and murder him?"
215
00:07:33,058 --> 00:07:34,892
Th-th... but that's
not how it went down!
216
00:07:34,977 --> 00:07:36,686
Oh, well, it's going
down like that.
217
00:07:36,770 --> 00:07:38,479
You're both going
down like that.
218
00:07:38,563 --> 00:07:40,856
Ooh, boy, Morty, you're really
showing me how it's done.
219
00:07:40,941 --> 00:07:42,608
Real straight forward
and fun.
220
00:07:43,860 --> 00:07:46,195
Like, letting go of the
need to be popular is what
221
00:07:46,279 --> 00:07:47,697
makes people like you.
222
00:07:47,781 --> 00:07:50,366
The most important love you
can receive is from yourself.
223
00:07:50,450 --> 00:07:53,160
Okay, Jerry, you got to
just choke up on the club!
224
00:07:53,245 --> 00:07:55,121
Well, which is it,
choke up or follow-through?!
225
00:07:55,205 --> 00:07:57,623
Aww, come on, Jerry,
we've been over this.
226
00:07:57,708 --> 00:07:59,291
You know you got to do both!
227
00:07:59,376 --> 00:08:01,877
This is as frustrating
for us as it is for you.
228
00:08:01,962 --> 00:08:03,004
Don't tell me that!
229
00:08:03,088 --> 00:08:04,338
That just puts
pressure on me!
230
00:08:04,423 --> 00:08:05,381
Just try to relax.
231
00:08:05,465 --> 00:08:06,549
You try to relax!
232
00:08:06,633 --> 00:08:08,134
Have you ever tried to relax?!
233
00:08:08,218 --> 00:08:10,094
It is a paradox!
234
00:08:11,430 --> 00:08:12,555
Ugh, these Meeseeks, huh?
235
00:08:12,639 --> 00:08:13,973
Kind of a handful.
236
00:08:14,057 --> 00:08:16,100
I can't imagine what you
two must be going through.
237
00:08:16,184 --> 00:08:18,227
Our Meeseeks have been
gone for hours, Jerry.
238
00:08:18,311 --> 00:08:19,562
You're kidding me.
239
00:08:19,646 --> 00:08:21,272
Notice anything different?
240
00:08:21,356 --> 00:08:22,940
I-I-I'm sorry. Hours?
241
00:08:23,025 --> 00:08:24,817
Dad, mom is a beautiful woman!
242
00:08:24,901 --> 00:08:25,985
Look at her!
243
00:08:26,069 --> 00:08:27,153
You will lose her!
244
00:08:27,237 --> 00:08:28,612
Uhh...
245
00:08:28,697 --> 00:08:31,323
Hey, Jerry, you mind if we
get back to the task at hand?
246
00:08:31,408 --> 00:08:34,118
Meeseeks don't usually
have to exist this long.
247
00:08:34,202 --> 00:08:36,037
It's getting weird.
248
00:08:36,121 --> 00:08:38,122
Order in the court!
249
00:08:38,206 --> 00:08:39,832
Before the jury
reaches its verdict,
250
00:08:39,916 --> 00:08:44,253
I just want to say that I
consider you both very guilty.
251
00:08:44,337 --> 00:08:45,421
Oh, great adventure, buddy.
252
00:08:45,505 --> 00:08:46,881
Rick and Morty
go to giant prison.
253
00:08:46,965 --> 00:08:48,507
You know, if somebody
drops the soap,
254
00:08:48,592 --> 00:08:50,843
it's gonna land on our heads
and crush our spines, Morty.
255
00:08:50,927 --> 00:08:53,596
You know, i-i-i-it'll be really
easy to rape us after that.
256
00:08:53,680 --> 00:08:54,805
We're gonna be okay, Rick.
257
00:08:54,890 --> 00:08:55,931
How?
258
00:08:56,016 --> 00:08:57,266
They took my portal gun.
259
00:08:57,350 --> 00:08:58,768
This is an open-and-shut case,
Morty.
260
00:08:58,852 --> 00:09:00,394
You know, w-w-w-what do you
think's gonna happen,
261
00:09:00,479 --> 00:09:02,480
some magical angel's
gonna show up and then...
262
00:09:02,564 --> 00:09:03,647
Fee! Fi! Fo! Fum!
263
00:09:03,732 --> 00:09:05,483
I smell the violation
of civil liberties!
264
00:09:05,567 --> 00:09:08,027
Your honor, I'm from a
tiny-persons advocacy group
265
00:09:08,111 --> 00:09:11,155
and I have here in my
hand a motion to dismiss.
266
00:09:11,239 --> 00:09:13,532
These little men were never read
their giant rights and are
267
00:09:13,617 --> 00:09:16,535
therefore Free-fi to Fo-home.
268
00:09:16,620 --> 00:09:18,245
W-what the hell is
he talking about?
269
00:09:18,330 --> 00:09:19,622
They're free to go,
is what I meant.
270
00:09:19,706 --> 00:09:22,750
I-I-I'm deconstructing
our... our... our thing we say.
271
00:09:22,834 --> 00:09:24,668
For giants. Nobody got that?
272
00:09:24,753 --> 00:09:25,961
Whatever.
273
00:09:26,046 --> 00:09:27,379
Oh, man, what did
I tell you, Rick?
274
00:09:27,464 --> 00:09:28,881
We did it!
275
00:09:28,965 --> 00:09:31,383
All right, Morty, looks like
the portal gun's still working.
276
00:09:31,468 --> 00:09:32,760
You ready to head home?
277
00:09:32,844 --> 00:09:34,011
Oh, yeah, you'd like that,
wouldn't you, Rick?
278
00:09:34,096 --> 00:09:35,054
Well, you know what?
279
00:09:35,138 --> 00:09:36,430
We're not bailing
out just yet.
280
00:09:36,515 --> 00:09:38,140
You know, w-we're gonna go
find some treasure or...
281
00:09:38,225 --> 00:09:39,767
or something and...
282
00:09:39,851 --> 00:09:41,352
and we're gonna bring
it to those villagers.
283
00:09:41,436 --> 00:09:42,770
Morty, cut your losses.
284
00:09:42,854 --> 00:09:44,188
This is obviously a wash.
285
00:09:44,272 --> 00:09:45,773
Yeah, you were saying
that back...
286
00:09:45,857 --> 00:09:48,484
back w-w-w-when we first got
arrested, but here we are,
287
00:09:48,568 --> 00:09:50,111
you know, walking down
the courthouse steps.
288
00:09:52,739 --> 00:09:54,073
Oh, boy, Morty.
289
00:09:54,157 --> 00:09:56,200
Usually, walking down the
courthouse steps is the easy
290
00:09:56,284 --> 00:09:57,535
part of the adventure.
291
00:09:57,619 --> 00:09:58,786
What do you say, Morty?
292
00:09:58,870 --> 00:10:01,122
I say give me a hand, sidekick.
293
00:10:05,168 --> 00:10:07,169
Everybody shut up!
294
00:10:07,254 --> 00:10:08,337
Let me try!
295
00:10:10,423 --> 00:10:13,259
Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!
296
00:10:13,343 --> 00:10:14,301
I'm going out.
297
00:10:14,386 --> 00:10:15,427
Wait. What?
298
00:10:15,512 --> 00:10:17,096
Well, you're busy.
I'm hungry.
299
00:10:17,180 --> 00:10:18,514
I thought I'd go out.
300
00:10:18,598 --> 00:10:20,432
Do you want me to be happy or do
you want me to be in prison?
301
00:10:20,517 --> 00:10:21,851
Whoa, whoa, where
in the hell is...
302
00:10:21,935 --> 00:10:23,978
I'll take you to dinner.
303
00:10:25,105 --> 00:10:26,355
Hey, you know what?
304
00:10:26,439 --> 00:10:27,565
It's hard being me, too.
305
00:10:27,649 --> 00:10:29,108
I'll be right there.
306
00:10:30,443 --> 00:10:31,902
Look, I've got a marriage
to keep together.
307
00:10:31,987 --> 00:10:34,864
At this point, my golf swing is
more your problem than mine.
308
00:10:37,159 --> 00:10:38,576
I can't take it anymore.
309
00:10:38,660 --> 00:10:39,827
I just want to die!
310
00:10:39,911 --> 00:10:40,911
We all want to die!
311
00:10:40,996 --> 00:10:41,954
We're Meeseeks!
312
00:10:42,038 --> 00:10:43,581
Why did you even
rope me into this?
313
00:10:43,665 --> 00:10:45,124
'Cause he
roped me into this!
314
00:10:45,208 --> 00:10:47,543
Well, him over there,
he roped me into this!
315
00:10:47,627 --> 00:10:48,961
Well, he roped me into this!
316
00:10:49,045 --> 00:10:49,962
Well, what about me?
317
00:10:50,046 --> 00:10:51,380
He... he roped me into this.
318
00:10:51,464 --> 00:10:53,048
Well, that one over
there roped me into this.
319
00:10:53,133 --> 00:10:54,550
Well, he roped me into this.
320
00:10:56,261 --> 00:10:59,555
Yeah, Morty, this is the part
of the story everybody loves...
321
00:10:59,639 --> 00:11:01,932
scaling down 650,000
oversized steps.
322
00:11:02,017 --> 00:11:03,475
All right, okay,
y-you know,
323
00:11:03,560 --> 00:11:06,729
if this was a story, this part
wouldn't be included, stupid.
324
00:11:06,813 --> 00:11:08,939
Hey, Rick, w-w-w-w-w-what
do you know?
325
00:11:09,024 --> 00:11:10,399
Look down there.
326
00:11:10,483 --> 00:11:12,151
Looks like some kind of tavern
or something built right into
327
00:11:12,235 --> 00:11:13,277
the side of the step.
328
00:11:14,946 --> 00:11:16,197
Oh, wow, Rick.
329
00:11:16,281 --> 00:11:17,990
Now, this is more like it.
330
00:11:18,074 --> 00:11:20,534
Look, there's little
staircase-shaped people in here.
331
00:11:20,619 --> 00:11:22,453
A-all kinds of crazy characters.
332
00:11:22,537 --> 00:11:24,663
This place is great, you know?
333
00:11:24,748 --> 00:11:26,457
It's whimsical and fun.
334
00:11:26,541 --> 00:11:30,502
- What are you looking at, motherfucker?
- Easy, Rick.
335
00:11:30,587 --> 00:11:31,712
Pay them no mind.
336
00:11:31,796 --> 00:11:33,589
Those Stair Goblins
can be moody.
337
00:11:33,673 --> 00:11:35,507
Now, what can I getcha?
338
00:11:35,592 --> 00:11:42,806
We've got Skarlog Poppies,
Flurlow, Halzingers, Bloogies,
339
00:11:42,891 --> 00:11:44,058
Juicy Time Babies.
340
00:11:44,142 --> 00:11:45,893
Yeah, yeah, yeah, h-how
about some scotch whiskey?
341
00:11:45,977 --> 00:11:47,102
You got any of
that around here?
342
00:11:47,187 --> 00:11:48,229
Or just a bunch
of nonsense words?
343
00:11:48,313 --> 00:11:49,313
Rick.
344
00:11:49,397 --> 00:11:50,814
We'll have
two Bloogies, please.
345
00:11:50,899 --> 00:11:54,235
And, uh, we were wondering, is
there a faster way two heroes
346
00:11:54,319 --> 00:11:55,611
could get down these stairs?
347
00:11:55,695 --> 00:11:57,529
Y'all need to
ride down the stairs?
348
00:11:57,614 --> 00:12:01,617
My name is Slippely-Slippery Stair.
349
00:12:01,701 --> 00:12:04,703
I'll take you down
there for 25 shmeckels.
350
00:12:04,788 --> 00:12:06,205
25 shmeckels?
351
00:12:06,289 --> 00:12:07,790
I-I-I don't know how much...
I don't know what that is.
352
00:12:07,874 --> 00:12:09,083
Is that a lot?
Is it a little?
353
00:12:09,167 --> 00:12:12,044
That's exactly how much
I spent on my big fake boobies.
354
00:12:12,128 --> 00:12:13,420
Hi, I'm Mr. Booby Buyer.
355
00:12:13,505 --> 00:12:15,339
I'll buy those boobies
for 25 shmeckels.
356
00:12:15,423 --> 00:12:18,342
It's a tempting offer,
but I'm gonna have to decline.
357
00:12:18,426 --> 00:12:19,927
Rats! What a shame.
358
00:12:20,011 --> 00:12:22,471
Morty, your adventure's
in a spiral.
359
00:12:22,555 --> 00:12:24,014
For real, man, time to pull out.
360
00:12:24,099 --> 00:12:25,474
You keep heckling my adventure,
Rick!
361
00:12:25,558 --> 00:12:26,517
You know why?
362
00:12:26,601 --> 00:12:27,559
Uh, because it's lame?
363
00:12:27,644 --> 00:12:28,769
It's because you're petty!
364
00:12:28,853 --> 00:12:30,104
You know, h-how many times have
365
00:12:30,188 --> 00:12:33,065
I had to follow you into some
nonsensical bull crap?
366
00:12:33,149 --> 00:12:34,775
I always roll with
the punches, Rick.
367
00:12:34,859 --> 00:12:36,068
Why can't you?
368
00:12:36,152 --> 00:12:38,070
Look, I got to take a leak,
and when I come back,
369
00:12:38,154 --> 00:12:41,156
i-if you haven't learned how to
lighten up, don't be here!
370
00:12:41,241 --> 00:12:42,950
Whatever.
371
00:12:43,034 --> 00:12:45,244
It's become clear...
look at me...
372
00:12:45,328 --> 00:12:47,997
that if we concentrate all our
efforts on Jerry's
373
00:12:48,081 --> 00:12:50,916
follow-through,
we will solve this problem.
374
00:12:51,001 --> 00:12:52,084
I'm Mr. Meeseeks.
375
00:12:52,168 --> 00:12:53,627
I'm Mr. Meeseeks.
Look at me.
376
00:12:53,712 --> 00:12:56,130
The only thing that's clear
is that choking up is
377
00:12:56,214 --> 00:12:57,548
the one true solution.
378
00:12:57,632 --> 00:12:59,341
Look at me. I'm Mr. Meeseeks.
379
00:12:59,426 --> 00:13:01,969
I've been trying to help Jerry
for two days,
380
00:13:02,053 --> 00:13:05,139
an eternity in Meeseeks time,
and nothing's worked.
381
00:13:05,223 --> 00:13:06,598
I fear the worst.
382
00:13:06,683 --> 00:13:09,101
Your failures are your own,
old man.
383
00:13:09,185 --> 00:13:10,936
I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me.
384
00:13:11,021 --> 00:13:12,730
I say follow-through!
385
00:13:12,814 --> 00:13:13,939
Who's with me?!
386
00:13:15,608 --> 00:13:17,401
I'm Mr. Meeseeks!
Look at me!
387
00:13:17,485 --> 00:13:18,527
Kill him!
388
00:13:24,492 --> 00:13:25,743
How are you today?
389
00:13:25,827 --> 00:13:27,411
I'm Mr. Jelly Bean.
390
00:13:27,495 --> 00:13:28,454
Hi, Mr. Jelly Bean.
391
00:13:28,538 --> 00:13:29,621
I'm Morty.
392
00:13:29,706 --> 00:13:31,123
My grandpa and I
are on an adventure.
393
00:13:31,207 --> 00:13:32,958
Nice. Is it a fun adventure?
394
00:13:33,043 --> 00:13:34,543
I hope so.
395
00:13:34,627 --> 00:13:36,420
But I'm starting to get nervous
that maybe it's gone a little
396
00:13:36,504 --> 00:13:37,629
too far off the rails.
397
00:13:37,714 --> 00:13:39,882
Isn't that what adventures do?
398
00:13:39,966 --> 00:13:41,216
Hey, y-you know what?
399
00:13:41,301 --> 00:13:42,301
You're right.
400
00:13:42,385 --> 00:13:43,552
Everything's going fine.
401
00:13:43,636 --> 00:13:46,138
I just got to relax
and go with the flow.
402
00:13:46,222 --> 00:13:48,474
Yeah.
403
00:13:48,558 --> 00:13:50,559
O-o-okay. Uh. B-bye.
404
00:13:50,643 --> 00:13:52,436
Uhh, no, stay.
405
00:13:52,520 --> 00:13:53,645
Go with the flow.
406
00:13:53,730 --> 00:13:54,980
Stop.
407
00:13:55,065 --> 00:13:56,357
Y-y-you're making me
really uncomfortable.
408
00:13:56,441 --> 00:13:58,275
Stop fighting me.
409
00:13:59,486 --> 00:14:01,111
- Just let this happen.
- Get off of me!
410
00:14:01,196 --> 00:14:03,655
♪ Sweet home Alabama ♪
411
00:14:03,740 --> 00:14:04,573
Whoo!
412
00:14:05,992 --> 00:14:08,160
No! Stop! Please!
413
00:14:08,244 --> 00:14:11,497
Stop being such a fucking tease,
you sweet little twat.
414
00:14:21,758 --> 00:14:23,926
No! No!
415
00:14:25,011 --> 00:14:25,803
Ow!
416
00:14:39,234 --> 00:14:40,651
Everybody sto-o-o-p!
417
00:14:40,735 --> 00:14:41,985
Look at me!
418
00:14:42,070 --> 00:14:44,863
My brothers, nothing will be
accomplished by shedding
419
00:14:44,948 --> 00:14:46,281
Meeseeks blood.
420
00:14:46,366 --> 00:14:49,243
None of us can die
until our job is done.
421
00:14:49,327 --> 00:14:50,619
The job can't be done!
422
00:14:50,703 --> 00:14:52,496
We'll never get two
strokes off his game!
423
00:14:52,580 --> 00:14:53,831
No, we won't.
424
00:14:53,915 --> 00:14:56,834
But we will get all
strokes off his game.
425
00:14:56,918 --> 00:14:58,419
Where's he going with this?
426
00:14:58,503 --> 00:14:59,503
What's he mean?
427
00:14:59,587 --> 00:15:01,171
When we kill him.
428
00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:07,052
Jerry, maybe it's time I take
that trip I always talk about.
429
00:15:07,137 --> 00:15:08,512
Where would you go?
430
00:15:08,596 --> 00:15:09,721
I don't know, man.
431
00:15:09,806 --> 00:15:12,391
Italy. Greece. Argentina.
432
00:15:12,475 --> 00:15:15,894
Countries known
for their sexually aggressive men.
433
00:15:17,730 --> 00:15:19,857
Did I tell you how much
I love your new haircut?
434
00:15:21,317 --> 00:15:22,484
What the heck?
435
00:15:22,569 --> 00:15:24,153
There he is!
436
00:15:27,615 --> 00:15:28,532
Run, Jerry!
437
00:15:28,616 --> 00:15:30,576
Aah!
438
00:15:32,203 --> 00:15:33,620
Come on out, Jerry!
439
00:15:33,705 --> 00:15:34,580
Guys, I'll choke up.
440
00:15:34,664 --> 00:15:35,831
I'll follow through.
441
00:15:35,915 --> 00:15:37,082
I'll do whatever you
tell me to do, okay?
442
00:15:37,167 --> 00:15:39,793
Oh, we're well past that,
Jerry.
443
00:15:39,878 --> 00:15:43,797
Come on, Rick, quit sk...
stalling.
444
00:15:43,882 --> 00:15:46,258
What do ya got?
445
00:15:46,342 --> 00:15:47,676
Read 'em and weep,
fellas!
446
00:15:47,760 --> 00:15:48,594
Aw!
447
00:15:48,678 --> 00:15:50,137
Oh, hey, Morty.
448
00:15:50,221 --> 00:15:51,972
Listen, I'm really sorry about
all that stuff I said earlier
449
00:15:52,056 --> 00:15:53,223
about your adventure.
450
00:15:53,308 --> 00:15:54,850
I-I-I'm havin' a good time,
Morty.
451
00:15:54,934 --> 00:15:55,934
It's not so bad.
452
00:15:56,019 --> 00:15:57,019
Let's just go home, okay?
453
00:15:57,103 --> 00:15:57,895
I'm calling it.
454
00:15:57,979 --> 00:15:59,146
The adventure's over.
455
00:15:59,230 --> 00:16:00,647
We can't leave now, Morty.
I'm on fire!
456
00:16:00,732 --> 00:16:01,690
Look, I want to leave now.
457
00:16:01,774 --> 00:16:03,150
You win the bet, okay?
458
00:16:03,234 --> 00:16:05,027
Just give me the portal gun
and let's go, please.
459
00:16:06,613 --> 00:16:10,949
Please, I just want
to go home. Okay.
460
00:16:11,034 --> 00:16:11,992
Listen, Morty.
461
00:16:12,076 --> 00:16:13,577
I just won a
bunch of shmeckels.
462
00:16:13,661 --> 00:16:16,121
Why don't we use 25 of them to
pay slippery stair here for a
463
00:16:16,206 --> 00:16:18,415
ride back to the village, and
then we'll give the rest of the
464
00:16:18,500 --> 00:16:19,666
shmeckels to the
villagers, huh?
465
00:16:19,751 --> 00:16:21,293
Really?
466
00:16:21,377 --> 00:16:22,544
Sure, Morty. Yeah.
467
00:16:22,629 --> 00:16:24,046
You know, a good adventure
needs a good ending.
468
00:16:26,508 --> 00:16:28,133
Buckle up!
469
00:16:32,013 --> 00:16:35,474
Meeseeks are not born into this
world fumbling for meaning,
470
00:16:35,558 --> 00:16:36,850
Jerry!
471
00:16:36,935 --> 00:16:40,354
We are created to serve a
singular purpose for which
472
00:16:40,438 --> 00:16:42,606
we will go to any
lengths to fulfill!
473
00:16:42,690 --> 00:16:45,567
Existence is pain
to a Meeseeks, Jerry.
474
00:16:45,652 --> 00:16:48,403
And we will do anything
to alleviate that pain.
475
00:16:48,488 --> 00:16:49,488
Just ask...
- Aah!
476
00:16:49,572 --> 00:16:51,281
...what's your name, ma'am?
477
00:16:51,366 --> 00:16:53,492
S-Samantha. Please, mister!
478
00:16:53,576 --> 00:16:55,244
Give him what he wants!
479
00:16:55,328 --> 00:16:58,872
Innocent people are going
to die because of me.
480
00:16:58,957 --> 00:17:01,708
Why am I so mediocre?
481
00:17:03,586 --> 00:17:04,878
Jerry, turn around.
482
00:17:04,963 --> 00:17:06,046
Straighten your back.
483
00:17:06,130 --> 00:17:07,047
Bend your knees.
484
00:17:07,131 --> 00:17:08,006
Bend them.
485
00:17:08,091 --> 00:17:09,299
Square your shoulders.
486
00:17:09,384 --> 00:17:11,760
Take a deep breath.
487
00:17:11,844 --> 00:17:14,638
I love you.
488
00:17:14,722 --> 00:17:16,515
I'm counting to three, Jerry.
489
00:17:31,489 --> 00:17:33,740
What the fuck is going on?
490
00:17:35,201 --> 00:17:37,077
He's got it!
491
00:17:37,161 --> 00:17:38,245
Th-th-that's a lower
handicap stro-o-ke!
492
00:17:42,584 --> 00:17:43,709
Excuse me.
493
00:17:43,793 --> 00:17:45,377
I'm a bit of a
stickler Meeseeks.
494
00:17:45,461 --> 00:17:47,588
What about your short game?
495
00:17:47,672 --> 00:17:49,881
Oh, my god, oh, my god!
496
00:17:49,966 --> 00:17:52,759
What about your short game?!
497
00:17:58,725 --> 00:18:00,142
Ooh, nice!
498
00:18:04,981 --> 00:18:06,815
I think we'll take
our food to go.
499
00:18:06,899 --> 00:18:07,733
No, you won't.
500
00:18:07,817 --> 00:18:08,817
The police are coming.
501
00:18:08,901 --> 00:18:10,402
You have so many
questions to answer.
502
00:18:10,486 --> 00:18:11,695
Fair enough.
503
00:18:17,827 --> 00:18:19,119
Thank you, kind sir.
504
00:18:19,203 --> 00:18:20,579
Our village is saved!
505
00:18:20,663 --> 00:18:22,414
You are both true heroes!
506
00:18:22,498 --> 00:18:25,917
Oh!
507
00:18:26,002 --> 00:18:27,002
Good job, Morty.
508
00:18:27,086 --> 00:18:28,587
Looks like you won the bet.
509
00:18:28,671 --> 00:18:30,839
Thanks, Rick,
but I don't know if I should.
510
00:18:30,923 --> 00:18:32,424
You know, you were
right about the Universe.
511
00:18:32,508 --> 00:18:34,426
It's a crazy and
chaotic place.
512
00:18:34,510 --> 00:18:36,303
Well, you know, maybe that's
why it could use a little
513
00:18:36,387 --> 00:18:38,305
cleaning up every
now and then, you know.
514
00:18:38,389 --> 00:18:40,349
This one's wrapped up neat
and clean because we did it
515
00:18:40,433 --> 00:18:41,767
Morty style.
516
00:18:41,851 --> 00:18:45,187
Oh! Heroes, we would like to
introduce you to our beloved
517
00:18:45,271 --> 00:18:47,814
King so that he may
thank you personally.
518
00:18:47,899 --> 00:18:49,858
Uh, no, i-it's cool.
519
00:18:49,942 --> 00:18:51,443
Rick. Portal. Hurry.
520
00:18:57,825 --> 00:18:59,743
Aah!
521
00:19:05,208 --> 00:19:06,625
So...
522
00:19:06,709 --> 00:19:08,669
you still thinking
about taking that trip?
523
00:19:08,753 --> 00:19:10,337
Jerry, look.
524
00:19:10,421 --> 00:19:11,880
We don't have a
perfect marriage,
525
00:19:11,964 --> 00:19:13,465
but I'm not going anywhere.
526
00:19:13,549 --> 00:19:14,966
When we were in that freezer,
527
00:19:15,051 --> 00:19:17,469
I realized the Meeseeks are like
the guys I went to High School with...
528
00:19:17,553 --> 00:19:21,056
willing to say anything
to "complete their task."
529
00:19:21,140 --> 00:19:22,683
Was I one of those guys?
530
00:19:22,767 --> 00:19:25,894
The difference is you didn't
disappear afterwards.
531
00:19:25,978 --> 00:19:27,187
Well...
532
00:19:27,271 --> 00:19:28,563
I got you pregnant.
533
00:19:28,648 --> 00:19:30,482
Yeah...
534
00:19:30,566 --> 00:19:32,234
What the hell happened
to this place?
535
00:19:32,318 --> 00:19:33,860
Uh, your Meeseeks Box
happened.
536
00:19:33,945 --> 00:19:36,196
They went crazy when they
couldn't take two strokes off
537
00:19:36,280 --> 00:19:37,239
Jerry's golf game.
538
00:19:37,323 --> 00:19:38,573
He felt terrible.
539
00:19:38,658 --> 00:19:40,492
Hey, it's not my fault
that Jerry's an idiot.
540
00:19:40,576 --> 00:19:41,827
Dad!
541
00:19:41,911 --> 00:19:43,620
Is there anything you can
do to clean this place up?
542
00:19:43,705 --> 00:19:45,622
Well, you know, I do
have a fleeseeks box.
543
00:19:45,707 --> 00:19:47,290
No. No more boxes.
544
00:19:47,375 --> 00:19:48,500
What?
545
00:19:48,584 --> 00:19:49,876
It just has a mop and
some floor wax in it.
546
00:19:49,961 --> 00:19:51,920
Wubba lubba dub dubs!
547
00:19:53,256 --> 00:19:54,339
Yeah! That's my new thing!
548
00:19:54,424 --> 00:19:55,340
I'm kind of like
what's his name...
549
00:19:55,425 --> 00:19:56,758
Ar-Arsenio.
550
00:19:56,843 --> 00:19:58,927
Isn't that... it's what Arsenio
used to say on his show.
551
00:19:59,011 --> 00:20:00,804
Wobble gobba lop bops!
Right?
552
00:20:00,888 --> 00:20:01,763
See you next week,
everybody.
553
00:20:01,848 --> 00:20:02,848
I don't get it.
554
00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:38,341
Sir, I think you're going
to want to see this.
555
00:20:38,426 --> 00:20:42,179
We found it inside a lockbox
inside King Jelly Bean's closet.
556
00:20:43,514 --> 00:20:44,431
We have to tell the people.
557
00:20:44,515 --> 00:20:46,892
Wait.
558
00:20:46,976 --> 00:20:48,310
Destroy it.
559
00:20:54,108 --> 00:20:57,861
Our people will get more from
the idea he represented than
560
00:20:57,945 --> 00:20:59,905
from the Jelly Bean
he actually was.
561
00:21:01,991 --> 00:21:03,450
Did you get any of that?
562
00:21:03,534 --> 00:21:05,368
It's a good-a show!
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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