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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,831 --> 00:00:07,706 All right, it's Saturday. 2 00:00:07,790 --> 00:00:10,927 I got a lot of nothing planned for today so let's get to it! 3 00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:13,016 A lot of nothing? 4 00:00:13,100 --> 00:00:15,061 But look at all the fun stuff on today's community calendar: 5 00:00:15,145 --> 00:00:17,890 A car show, a line-dancing contest... 6 00:00:17,974 --> 00:00:19,196 a pie festival! 7 00:00:19,280 --> 00:00:20,937 Ooh! 8 00:00:21,021 --> 00:00:23,200 All perfect for our father-son day, Jake. 9 00:00:23,284 --> 00:00:25,680 Let's take a joyride to a line-dancing contest 10 00:00:25,764 --> 00:00:28,727 and start a pie fight. 11 00:00:28,811 --> 00:00:30,163 Or we can do something 12 00:00:30,247 --> 00:00:32,992 that doesn't ruin other people's good time. 13 00:00:33,076 --> 00:00:34,636 You're taking a lot off the table there. 14 00:00:37,602 --> 00:00:39,216 Great, a fly got in. 15 00:00:39,300 --> 00:00:41,783 I guess this is my entertainment for the day. 16 00:00:45,871 --> 00:00:48,048 Amy, stop! It's me, Colby! 17 00:00:49,875 --> 00:00:51,358 I shape-shifted into a fly 18 00:00:51,442 --> 00:00:53,360 and I've been stuck ever since. 19 00:00:53,444 --> 00:00:55,797 So you're still gross but now you have wings. 20 00:00:55,881 --> 00:00:57,756 Pretty much. 21 00:00:57,840 --> 00:00:59,671 Wait, you're a fly now? 22 00:00:59,755 --> 00:01:02,075 Then why have I been talking to this oven mitt all morning? 23 00:01:03,224 --> 00:01:05,037 We just thought you were losing it. 24 00:01:06,414 --> 00:01:07,809 And I'm nice now, 25 00:01:07,893 --> 00:01:09,173 so I didn't want to say anything. 26 00:01:10,809 --> 00:01:12,466 Morning. 27 00:01:12,550 --> 00:01:14,164 Hey, Mom, what are you all dressed up for? 28 00:01:14,248 --> 00:01:16,688 Well, I'm going to the community job fair 29 00:01:16,772 --> 00:01:17,994 at your school. 30 00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:19,821 Mama's gonna join the work force! 31 00:01:19,905 --> 00:01:21,475 Why do you want a job? 32 00:01:21,559 --> 00:01:23,042 I mean, I get the money part, 33 00:01:23,126 --> 00:01:25,001 but don't they make you work, too? 34 00:01:25,085 --> 00:01:26,045 Everyone in the family has found 35 00:01:26,129 --> 00:01:28,004 a place in this new life except me. 36 00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:29,266 I mean, you all go to school, 37 00:01:29,350 --> 00:01:31,572 your father's a substitute teacher... 38 00:01:31,656 --> 00:01:34,662 I used to be third in command of all villains. 39 00:01:34,746 --> 00:01:37,622 And now I spend my day building castles 40 00:01:37,706 --> 00:01:39,624 out of tortilla chips. 41 00:01:39,708 --> 00:01:43,363 Spoiler alert: The drawbridge is my mouth. 42 00:01:45,669 --> 00:01:47,500 Good for you getting a job. 43 00:01:47,585 --> 00:01:51,244 Bad for whoever you work for, but good for you! 44 00:01:51,328 --> 00:01:52,811 I'm glad you feel that way 45 00:01:52,895 --> 00:01:55,074 because you're both coming with me. 46 00:01:55,158 --> 00:01:56,644 For moral support? 47 00:01:56,729 --> 00:01:59,495 No. To show me where your silly little school is. 48 00:02:01,556 --> 00:02:03,865 Is that a fly? 49 00:02:03,949 --> 00:02:06,085 I'll get him! 50 00:02:06,169 --> 00:02:08,255 Wait, Mom, no! That's Colby! 51 00:02:33,892 --> 00:02:35,288 Hello, Celia. 52 00:02:35,372 --> 00:02:37,029 Mm-hmm. 53 00:02:37,113 --> 00:02:39,640 And Robert, the police chief! 54 00:02:39,724 --> 00:02:41,164 So nice to see you! 55 00:02:41,248 --> 00:02:42,904 Since we are law-abiding citizens. 56 00:02:42,988 --> 00:02:44,602 In fact, that's my favorite thing to do with the law: 57 00:02:44,686 --> 00:02:46,343 Abide it. 58 00:02:46,427 --> 00:02:48,040 Well, I need my paint supplies, 59 00:02:48,124 --> 00:02:51,261 so about you abide outta my way? 60 00:02:51,345 --> 00:02:53,176 Wait. Why are your paint supplies in here? 61 00:02:53,260 --> 00:02:54,916 I don't want 'em at my house. 62 00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:59,095 I need the space for my medieval weapons collection. 63 00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:04,143 You haven't lived till you've seen her wield a Viking axe. 64 00:03:04,227 --> 00:03:06,487 Well, I guess I'd rather not live. 65 00:03:07,578 --> 00:03:09,279 The paint's for me. 66 00:03:09,363 --> 00:03:10,932 I'm doing a little graffiti cleanup downtown. 67 00:03:11,016 --> 00:03:12,600 Oh, cool. Can I help? 68 00:03:12,687 --> 00:03:13,506 I've been looking for ways 69 00:03:13,591 --> 00:03:15,307 to get more involved in the community. 70 00:03:15,392 --> 00:03:16,831 Absolutely! 71 00:03:16,916 --> 00:03:19,249 That's very admirable, son. 72 00:03:19,334 --> 00:03:23,366 But I thought we were gonna hang out today, actual son. 73 00:03:23,640 --> 00:03:25,776 Its' okay, Dad. We can still do something this afternoon. 74 00:03:25,860 --> 00:03:27,647 This afternoon, huh? Deal. 75 00:03:27,731 --> 00:03:29,382 I'll see you at 12:01 sharp. 76 00:03:31,648 --> 00:03:34,567 Well, Robert, while you're out, 77 00:03:34,651 --> 00:03:38,006 I'll be preparing for our one-month anniversary tonight. 78 00:03:38,090 --> 00:03:41,923 Ooh, that's what I call a win-win. 79 00:03:42,007 --> 00:03:44,664 - How about a little preview? - Oh! 80 00:03:44,748 --> 00:03:46,747 There are children in the room! 81 00:03:51,842 --> 00:03:53,935 Well, it's about time! 82 00:03:54,019 --> 00:03:55,327 You were supposed to be back hours ago. 83 00:03:55,411 --> 00:03:56,807 You kept me waiting so long, 84 00:03:56,891 --> 00:03:58,582 I ate three of your mom's chip castles. 85 00:03:59,720 --> 00:04:01,943 Your son was a machine today! 86 00:04:02,027 --> 00:04:05,772 He cleaned up every last shred of graffiti in town. 87 00:04:05,856 --> 00:04:09,341 Sorry for accidentally erasing all those crosswalks. 88 00:04:09,425 --> 00:04:11,430 That's okay. You gave me a reason to write more 89 00:04:11,514 --> 00:04:12,904 jay walking tickets. 90 00:04:14,691 --> 00:04:17,169 Anyway, thanks again for your help. 91 00:04:23,131 --> 00:04:24,717 Wow. That guy should arrest himself 92 00:04:24,802 --> 00:04:26,410 for overstaying his welcome. 93 00:04:28,009 --> 00:04:30,058 Anyway... 94 00:04:30,142 --> 00:04:32,780 check out the amazing afternoon I planned for us. 95 00:04:33,026 --> 00:04:35,709 Don't you think I'm a little old to play with toys? 96 00:04:35,960 --> 00:04:38,269 Don't you think you're a little old to play with toys? 97 00:04:38,353 --> 00:04:39,880 We're not playing with them. 98 00:04:39,964 --> 00:04:41,533 We're using them to plan a cell-tower heist. 99 00:04:41,617 --> 00:04:43,057 Why would we do that? 100 00:04:43,141 --> 00:04:44,712 The cell reception here is terrible. 101 00:04:45,578 --> 00:04:46,538 But with your super strength, 102 00:04:46,622 --> 00:04:47,800 we can move the tower from 103 00:04:47,884 --> 00:04:49,541 across town to our neighborhood. 104 00:04:49,625 --> 00:04:51,500 This is the plan. This one's me. 105 00:04:51,584 --> 00:04:53,545 "Hey, Jake, lift up that cell tower, would ya?" 106 00:04:53,629 --> 00:04:55,547 "Sure thing, Dad! You're the best!" 107 00:04:55,631 --> 00:04:57,810 "Uh-oh, here comes that dork Robert!" 108 00:04:57,894 --> 00:05:00,117 "You're not my real dad!" 109 00:05:03,465 --> 00:05:05,731 Should I be worried about you? 110 00:05:05,815 --> 00:05:09,431 Come on, Jake! You and I used to do stuff like this all the time! 111 00:05:09,515 --> 00:05:12,173 Remember when we chiseled my face into Mount Rushmore? 112 00:05:12,257 --> 00:05:15,039 Of course. Your nose fell off and it started a rock slide. 113 00:05:16,957 --> 00:05:18,527 Dad, I told you I'm just not into doing 114 00:05:18,611 --> 00:05:19,963 villain stuff anymore. 115 00:05:20,047 --> 00:05:22,618 Oh, okay, I'll meet you halfway. 116 00:05:22,702 --> 00:05:23,880 Why don't we just hit golf balls 117 00:05:23,964 --> 00:05:25,273 into the neighbors' chimneys. 118 00:05:25,357 --> 00:05:27,144 That's fun, innocent. 119 00:05:27,228 --> 00:05:29,320 Nobody gets hurt except the occasional roofer. 120 00:05:29,404 --> 00:05:31,105 Ha! 121 00:05:31,189 --> 00:05:33,411 Actually, I was hoping we could postpone 122 00:05:33,495 --> 00:05:34,586 our plan to hang out today so I can go on 123 00:05:34,670 --> 00:05:35,848 a ride-along with Robert. 124 00:05:35,932 --> 00:05:38,242 A ride-along?! In a police car? 125 00:05:38,326 --> 00:05:42,116 You know that's our family's least favorite kind of car! 126 00:05:42,200 --> 00:05:44,553 But if you'd rather do that than hang out with me... 127 00:05:44,637 --> 00:05:45,852 Thanks, Dad! 128 00:05:53,298 --> 00:05:54,955 Wow, Hartley. This resumé you wrote 129 00:05:55,039 --> 00:05:57,435 makes my mom's work history sound amazing. 130 00:05:57,519 --> 00:06:00,961 I had no idea you're a better liar on paper than you are in person? 131 00:06:01,045 --> 00:06:04,225 I didn't lie. I "finessed" the words. 132 00:06:04,309 --> 00:06:06,053 But let's just hope nobody calls the references 133 00:06:06,137 --> 00:06:08,577 because those are all fake. 134 00:06:08,661 --> 00:06:11,145 Well, I don't know how you could possibly "finesse" 135 00:06:11,229 --> 00:06:13,321 that I was the number three villain in the world, 136 00:06:13,405 --> 00:06:15,801 specializing in electrocution. 137 00:06:15,885 --> 00:06:18,065 By saying you were a senior executive 138 00:06:18,149 --> 00:06:20,067 with expertise in electrical engineering. 139 00:06:20,151 --> 00:06:21,982 Oh! That's good! 140 00:06:22,066 --> 00:06:25,463 That's like lying without lying. 141 00:06:25,547 --> 00:06:27,154 Okay, now let's go get me a job! 142 00:06:29,464 --> 00:06:31,382 Uh, hi. 143 00:06:31,466 --> 00:06:34,864 Hi, Donna Plank, founder of FacciaGrande face cream. 144 00:06:34,948 --> 00:06:36,387 And you are? 145 00:06:36,471 --> 00:06:37,954 I'm Eva Madden. 146 00:06:38,038 --> 00:06:41,256 This is my resumé! 147 00:06:42,564 --> 00:06:45,396 Donna Plank doesn't do paper. 148 00:06:45,480 --> 00:06:48,741 I want you to tell me why I should hire you. 149 00:06:49,441 --> 00:06:51,707 Uh... 150 00:06:51,791 --> 00:06:54,927 Don't be nervous but you're already tanking this. 151 00:06:55,011 --> 00:06:59,883 No. 152 00:07:06,153 --> 00:07:08,245 I think that was a great first try. 153 00:07:08,329 --> 00:07:10,421 Are you finessing words again? 154 00:07:10,505 --> 00:07:11,764 What do you think? 155 00:07:15,119 --> 00:07:17,124 Jake may not want to hang out now 156 00:07:17,208 --> 00:07:18,951 but wait till he sees me having fun 157 00:07:19,035 --> 00:07:20,997 with a clone of his old villainous self! 158 00:07:21,081 --> 00:07:24,261 Bad Jake is your boy! 159 00:07:24,345 --> 00:07:25,871 Uh, don't get too excited. 160 00:07:25,955 --> 00:07:29,049 You're basically gonna live for a day. 161 00:07:29,133 --> 00:07:31,616 But once he gets jealous and comes back to me, 162 00:07:31,700 --> 00:07:34,663 I'll vaporize you and everybody wins. 163 00:07:34,747 --> 00:07:37,709 Oh. I don't wanna vaporize the wrong one. 164 00:07:37,793 --> 00:07:41,496 Here. Wear this pin so I can tell you apart. 165 00:07:41,580 --> 00:07:45,152 Wait, so you're telling me I only exist to be a tool of your spite? 166 00:07:45,236 --> 00:07:48,546 No! You're a synthetic symbol of my love for my son. 167 00:07:48,630 --> 00:07:50,481 But you're still only gonna live for a day. 168 00:07:51,807 --> 00:07:52,978 Works for me! 169 00:07:54,549 --> 00:07:58,078 Hey! I spent hours on that! 170 00:07:58,162 --> 00:08:00,552 We are gonna have so much fun! 171 00:08:03,776 --> 00:08:06,651 ♪♪ 172 00:08:06,735 --> 00:08:08,653 Okay, Jake should be here any minute. 173 00:08:08,737 --> 00:08:11,308 Whatever you do, look like you're having a blast! 174 00:08:11,392 --> 00:08:13,093 I wasn't even alive two hours ago. 175 00:08:13,177 --> 00:08:14,610 Of course, I'm having a blast. 176 00:08:18,573 --> 00:08:20,100 What is going on? 177 00:08:20,184 --> 00:08:22,580 Oh, hi. I'm Bad Jake. 178 00:08:22,664 --> 00:08:25,185 You must be... Lame Jake. 179 00:08:26,146 --> 00:08:27,890 No, I'm regular Jake. 180 00:08:27,974 --> 00:08:31,937 I mean, Normal Jake... Just Jake! 181 00:08:32,021 --> 00:08:33,678 Since you don't want to hang out with me anymore, 182 00:08:33,762 --> 00:08:36,072 you wouldn't mind if I made a clone of you who does. 183 00:08:36,156 --> 00:08:38,205 You have to get rid of him. 184 00:08:38,289 --> 00:08:40,424 What's the matter? You jealous? 185 00:08:40,508 --> 00:08:44,298 Hello? Anybody home? 186 00:08:44,382 --> 00:08:46,213 No, I'm worried that our landlady 187 00:08:46,297 --> 00:08:47,605 who comes over every ten minutes 188 00:08:47,689 --> 00:08:49,085 might see that there's two of me! 189 00:08:49,169 --> 00:08:51,392 Good point. Bad Jake, go hide. 190 00:08:51,476 --> 00:08:55,483 Sorry, old man. I play by my own rules. 191 00:08:55,567 --> 00:08:59,487 I'm sorry, but how can you not love this guy?! 192 00:08:59,571 --> 00:09:01,657 Time's up! I'm coming in! 193 00:09:05,011 --> 00:09:07,669 Hello, Celia! Look at you. 194 00:09:07,753 --> 00:09:10,628 Dating the police chief and still making illegal entries. 195 00:09:10,712 --> 00:09:13,538 Look at you. Still thinking I care. 196 00:09:14,977 --> 00:09:17,374 I came to talk to Jake. 197 00:09:17,458 --> 00:09:19,376 Since you've gotten to know Robert, 198 00:09:19,460 --> 00:09:21,770 I wanted to get your opinion on the anniversary gift 199 00:09:21,854 --> 00:09:24,555 I picked out for him. 200 00:09:24,639 --> 00:09:27,341 Lame! Get him a flame thrower. 201 00:09:27,425 --> 00:09:30,860 Good idea! I can get him one that matches mine! 202 00:09:35,737 --> 00:09:38,003 And that's why we can't keep Bad Jake around. 203 00:09:38,087 --> 00:09:39,999 Why? Because you're jealous? 204 00:09:41,047 --> 00:09:43,095 No! Stop saying that. 205 00:09:43,179 --> 00:09:44,967 And stop making fake people to get back with your family. 206 00:09:45,051 --> 00:09:46,882 This is just like the time you made a fake mom 207 00:09:46,966 --> 00:09:49,450 'cause the real one forgot your birthday! 208 00:09:49,534 --> 00:09:52,714 She'll never make that mistake again. 209 00:09:52,798 --> 00:09:54,889 Whatever, I have to get ready for the ride-along. 210 00:09:56,758 --> 00:09:59,895 All right, Bad Jake, this is not working. 211 00:09:59,979 --> 00:10:01,766 We have to up our game. 212 00:10:01,850 --> 00:10:04,813 Time to hit some golf balls into the neighbor's chimneys! 213 00:10:04,897 --> 00:10:06,678 Yeah! 214 00:10:10,076 --> 00:10:12,336 All right, I love you but that's getting old. 215 00:10:16,909 --> 00:10:19,219 - Mom, are you okay? - I don't know what just happened. 216 00:10:19,303 --> 00:10:21,482 I have always been fearless, 217 00:10:21,566 --> 00:10:23,266 and she asked me why she should hire me, 218 00:10:23,350 --> 00:10:25,486 and I... froze. 219 00:10:25,570 --> 00:10:27,314 That happens to me at the fro-yo shop. 220 00:10:27,398 --> 00:10:30,099 I walk in knowing what I want but when they take my order, 221 00:10:30,183 --> 00:10:33,052 I freeze up in a vortex of vanilla, chocolate and swirl. 222 00:10:34,448 --> 00:10:36,055 The struggle is real. 223 00:10:37,799 --> 00:10:39,413 Maybe you were just feeling pressured 224 00:10:39,497 --> 00:10:40,718 because of the resumé scam. 225 00:10:40,802 --> 00:10:42,242 Mm. Leave it to Hartley 226 00:10:42,326 --> 00:10:43,721 to bring us all down with her lies. 227 00:10:43,805 --> 00:10:45,854 - What? - I hate to say it, 228 00:10:45,938 --> 00:10:47,769 but I think Onyx passing me over 229 00:10:47,853 --> 00:10:49,945 for that promotion has really gotten into my head. 230 00:10:50,029 --> 00:10:53,340 I gave that job 20 years of my life. 231 00:10:53,424 --> 00:10:55,080 And now, I've lost my identity, 232 00:10:55,164 --> 00:10:57,126 my confidence, 233 00:10:57,210 --> 00:10:59,514 my lifetime membership at the villain fitness center. 234 00:11:00,996 --> 00:11:02,740 Villains have a fitness center? 235 00:11:02,824 --> 00:11:06,657 It's more of a dungeon with a treadmill. 236 00:11:06,741 --> 00:11:08,746 Mom, look, I know it didn't go the way you planned 237 00:11:08,830 --> 00:11:10,139 but did you really want a job selling face cream 238 00:11:10,223 --> 00:11:11,836 for Donna Plank? 239 00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:13,490 It's not about the job, love. 240 00:11:13,574 --> 00:11:15,753 It's about proving to myself that I can 241 00:11:15,837 --> 00:11:19,061 feel just as important as I used to in the villain world. 242 00:11:19,145 --> 00:11:20,758 Well then, you're going back to finish that interview. 243 00:11:20,842 --> 00:11:22,107 - Oh. - How? 244 00:11:22,191 --> 00:11:23,935 She couldn't even get a word out. 245 00:11:24,019 --> 00:11:26,286 Well then, we'll just have to get the words out for her. 246 00:11:28,676 --> 00:11:30,812 - Ready, Colby? - This better be good. 247 00:11:30,896 --> 00:11:33,548 I was just about to cannonball into someone's chowder. 248 00:11:34,552 --> 00:11:36,383 Here's the plan. 249 00:11:36,467 --> 00:11:38,602 Mom, you'll try interviewing again but this time, 250 00:11:38,686 --> 00:11:40,387 Colby will be listening to questions. 251 00:11:40,471 --> 00:11:42,171 Then he'll fly back and feed them to Hartley. 252 00:11:42,255 --> 00:11:43,694 Then she'll tell me how you should respond 253 00:11:43,778 --> 00:11:46,088 and I'll use my vocal manipulation to make you say it. 254 00:11:46,172 --> 00:11:48,693 Brilliant! And so simple! 255 00:11:51,090 --> 00:11:53,051 Wait, do you have the power to make people 256 00:11:53,135 --> 00:11:54,531 say whatever you want? 257 00:11:54,615 --> 00:11:57,491 I sure do. Whoa, that was creepy! 258 00:11:57,575 --> 00:11:59,574 Don't call it creepy. Stop that! 259 00:12:02,971 --> 00:12:06,587 Hello! I'm back for my follow-up interview. 260 00:12:06,671 --> 00:12:09,329 Donna Plank doesn't do second chances. 261 00:12:09,413 --> 00:12:12,593 But since I am legally required to conduct interviews 262 00:12:12,677 --> 00:12:15,596 before I just give the job to my niece... 263 00:12:15,680 --> 00:12:18,686 Go ahead, tell me about your sales experience. 264 00:12:18,770 --> 00:12:19,991 Oh, uh... 265 00:12:22,121 --> 00:12:24,561 She wants to know about Mom's sales experience. 266 00:12:24,645 --> 00:12:26,433 Well, she did help Onyx sell stolen weapons 267 00:12:26,517 --> 00:12:27,782 to a foreign dictator. 268 00:12:27,866 --> 00:12:30,605 - What? - Stop judging. Start finessing. 269 00:12:32,218 --> 00:12:33,825 Hello? 270 00:12:35,874 --> 00:12:38,967 Okay, try this... 271 00:12:39,051 --> 00:12:41,622 I have facilitated high-level 272 00:12:41,706 --> 00:12:44,886 government purchases of valuable assets. 273 00:12:44,970 --> 00:12:46,627 Impressive. 274 00:12:46,711 --> 00:12:49,630 Although you did take a very long pause 275 00:12:49,714 --> 00:12:50,979 before answering. 276 00:12:51,063 --> 00:12:52,850 Yes. 277 00:12:54,327 --> 00:12:56,506 This thing is driving me crazy! 278 00:12:56,590 --> 00:12:59,857 - Hey. Don't hurt it! - Don't hurt the fly? 279 00:12:59,941 --> 00:13:02,251 That's it! To sell FacciaGrande 280 00:13:02,335 --> 00:13:04,645 you have to crush the competition 281 00:13:04,729 --> 00:13:07,865 and you are so weak, you can't even crush a fly! 282 00:13:07,949 --> 00:13:12,740 We're done. I am so glad I didn't offer you water. 283 00:13:12,824 --> 00:13:15,046 My mom never backs down from a fight. 284 00:13:15,130 --> 00:13:17,353 This is gonna get ugly. 285 00:13:17,437 --> 00:13:18,827 Thank you for for your time. 286 00:13:22,137 --> 00:13:24,136 Okay, that is not my mom. 287 00:13:27,665 --> 00:13:29,757 - Fore! - Ouch! 288 00:13:29,841 --> 00:13:31,585 Ooh... 289 00:13:31,669 --> 00:13:33,720 Bad day for that kind of lay out on the sundeck. 290 00:13:34,976 --> 00:13:36,894 Hey, Jake, get out here and see all the fun 291 00:13:36,978 --> 00:13:39,593 I'm having with your clone! 292 00:13:39,677 --> 00:13:41,928 Probably shouldn't be shouting that. I'll go get him. 293 00:13:47,641 --> 00:13:50,430 Whoa, I almost got a birdie! 294 00:13:50,514 --> 00:13:52,948 Oh, that's why they call it that. 295 00:13:53,778 --> 00:13:55,739 Hey, Jake. 296 00:13:55,823 --> 00:13:57,959 Ready to go for a ride in my squad car? 297 00:13:58,043 --> 00:14:00,744 Oh, no. You're not getting me in the back of one of those. 298 00:14:00,828 --> 00:14:03,567 Don't be silly. You're riding up front. 299 00:14:04,745 --> 00:14:05,961 Wait, really? 300 00:14:06,965 --> 00:14:08,703 I'm in! 301 00:14:11,535 --> 00:14:13,670 Come on, Jake! How many people can say 302 00:14:13,754 --> 00:14:15,405 they've caddied for their own clone? 303 00:14:18,933 --> 00:14:22,287 Wait. Why is Robert's squad car leaving without me? 304 00:14:22,371 --> 00:14:23,550 Well, he obviously hates you. 305 00:14:23,634 --> 00:14:25,545 I tried to warn you about that guy. 306 00:14:26,941 --> 00:14:28,685 No, look! 307 00:14:28,769 --> 00:14:30,637 Robert took Bad Jake on the ride-along! 308 00:14:32,207 --> 00:14:34,011 Well, on the bright side, 309 00:14:34,191 --> 00:14:36,258 it looks like your afternoon just opened up. 310 00:14:43,001 --> 00:14:45,180 I told you Bad Jake was a bad idea! 311 00:14:45,264 --> 00:14:47,748 Now my evil clone is on a ride-along with the chief of police! 312 00:14:47,832 --> 00:14:48,662 He's gonna figure out we're villains! 313 00:14:48,746 --> 00:14:50,533 Let's not panic yet. 314 00:14:50,617 --> 00:14:52,274 I'm sure it'll be fine. 315 00:14:52,358 --> 00:14:55,277 Whoo-hoo! 316 00:14:55,361 --> 00:14:57,577 - Get in here! - Fine. 317 00:14:59,583 --> 00:15:01,370 Nice haircut, lady! 318 00:15:01,454 --> 00:15:03,764 Do you and your labradoodle use the same groomer? 319 00:15:03,848 --> 00:15:06,984 Hey! That's rude. 320 00:15:07,068 --> 00:15:08,763 Although that haircut is a crime! 321 00:15:13,074 --> 00:15:15,558 It's just one interview, Mrs. Madden. 322 00:15:15,642 --> 00:15:17,517 You'll get the next one. 323 00:15:17,601 --> 00:15:19,954 Or the one after that. Or the one after that. 324 00:15:20,038 --> 00:15:21,521 - Hartley! - What? 325 00:15:21,605 --> 00:15:22,777 It's a numbers game! 326 00:15:24,520 --> 00:15:26,134 I really thought our plan would work. 327 00:15:26,218 --> 00:15:28,571 It's not your fault. 328 00:15:28,655 --> 00:15:30,704 Maybe Donna Plank is right. 329 00:15:30,788 --> 00:15:34,316 Maybe Onyx was right. Maybe I am weak. 330 00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:36,579 No! No way! You are not weak! 331 00:15:36,663 --> 00:15:38,363 You are the same unstoppable woman 332 00:15:38,447 --> 00:15:40,801 I grew up wanting to be like. 333 00:15:40,885 --> 00:15:42,759 You just need to show that clueless second rate 334 00:15:42,843 --> 00:15:44,326 cream queen who you really are. 335 00:15:47,021 --> 00:15:48,939 You're right. 336 00:15:49,023 --> 00:15:51,072 I've been letting the Onyx's of the world get me down. 337 00:15:51,156 --> 00:15:53,161 For what? 338 00:15:53,245 --> 00:15:55,990 I mean, I know what I'm capable of. 339 00:15:56,074 --> 00:15:58,993 And I do appreciate you standing up to him for me. 340 00:15:59,077 --> 00:16:00,603 But somewhere along the way, 341 00:16:00,687 --> 00:16:02,817 wow, I lost my voice. 342 00:16:05,083 --> 00:16:07,305 It's time to start speaking for myself again. 343 00:16:07,389 --> 00:16:09,612 Okay. 344 00:16:09,696 --> 00:16:12,652 Alright, Planky. Let's do this. 345 00:16:14,919 --> 00:16:16,706 Ugh. You again. 346 00:16:16,790 --> 00:16:18,969 Yeah, it's me again! 347 00:16:19,053 --> 00:16:21,748 Eva Madden. That's right, I can say my whole name, too! 348 00:16:23,449 --> 00:16:25,149 You think I can't squash a fly? 349 00:16:25,233 --> 00:16:28,979 I could crush everything in my path! 350 00:16:29,063 --> 00:16:32,679 Oh, now that's the mom I know. 351 00:16:32,763 --> 00:16:37,292 My ruthlessness and cruelty put this place on the map! 352 00:16:37,376 --> 00:16:40,382 And you pick that half-lizard Slither over me? 353 00:16:40,466 --> 00:16:42,117 Okay, Mom, taking a weird left turn. 354 00:16:43,817 --> 00:16:45,953 You sit there like a deluded fool 355 00:16:46,037 --> 00:16:47,476 on your fancy throne 356 00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:50,000 and you will never... 357 00:16:50,084 --> 00:16:52,612 rule the world without me... 358 00:16:52,696 --> 00:16:53,867 Onyx. 359 00:16:54,915 --> 00:16:56,093 What's going on? 360 00:16:56,177 --> 00:16:58,618 Did you just chug an energy drink? 361 00:17:00,486 --> 00:17:02,099 I think we had a real personal breakthrough. 362 00:17:02,183 --> 00:17:04,014 - It's time to go now. - I'm not done! 363 00:17:04,098 --> 00:17:07,931 You don't think I can sell your stupid face cream? 364 00:17:08,015 --> 00:17:12,669 Oh. All I need to do is show everyone here how it works. 365 00:17:20,506 --> 00:17:23,158 Now, when do I start? 366 00:17:27,078 --> 00:17:30,345 One-Adam-Twelve, we have a suspect who won't stop farting, 367 00:17:30,429 --> 00:17:33,087 he should be considered silent but deadly. 368 00:17:34,346 --> 00:17:36,003 Give me that! 369 00:17:36,087 --> 00:17:37,918 What's gotten into you? 370 00:17:38,002 --> 00:17:39,484 I'm about to take you to the station 371 00:17:39,568 --> 00:17:42,224 and give you a "ride-along" in a holding cell. 372 00:17:43,137 --> 00:17:45,360 - Surprise! - Ahh! 373 00:17:45,444 --> 00:17:47,754 Celia! What are you doing back there? 374 00:17:47,838 --> 00:17:50,757 I wanted to surprise you for our anniversary. 375 00:17:50,841 --> 00:17:52,106 I was trying to leave you a gift, 376 00:17:52,190 --> 00:17:55,152 but there's no door handles back here. 377 00:17:55,236 --> 00:17:57,154 So, you've been hiding for an hour? 378 00:17:57,238 --> 00:18:01,768 I would have popped up sooner but I really like eavesdropping. 379 00:18:01,852 --> 00:18:03,378 All units, we have a disturbance 380 00:18:03,462 --> 00:18:04,945 at the Valley View High job fair. 381 00:18:05,029 --> 00:18:07,295 Ooh, that doesn't sound good. 382 00:18:07,379 --> 00:18:09,944 Maybe we should swing by the house and grab my flamethrower. 383 00:18:14,299 --> 00:18:15,645 Whoo! 384 00:18:17,171 --> 00:18:19,916 No one, and I mean no one 385 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:22,049 face-creams Donna Plank! 386 00:18:22,133 --> 00:18:23,659 Oh! 387 00:18:23,743 --> 00:18:25,313 Well, that's obvious. 388 00:18:25,397 --> 00:18:27,619 I mean, you don't even face-cream yourself. 389 00:18:27,703 --> 00:18:29,752 I mean, just look at all those frown lines. 390 00:18:29,836 --> 00:18:30,971 Oh! 391 00:18:31,055 --> 00:18:33,880 I moisturize daily! 392 00:18:34,928 --> 00:18:36,367 Break it up, folks. 393 00:18:36,451 --> 00:18:38,842 Let's calm down... Oh! 394 00:18:40,673 --> 00:18:42,286 Who did that? 395 00:18:42,370 --> 00:18:43,890 She did. 396 00:18:45,460 --> 00:18:46,595 You're coming with me. 397 00:18:46,679 --> 00:18:48,684 Wait, what? But I didn't do it! 398 00:18:48,768 --> 00:18:50,468 Don't you know who I am? 399 00:18:50,552 --> 00:18:52,340 Of course, I do. 400 00:18:52,424 --> 00:18:54,640 Your face cream has scarred half the state. 401 00:18:55,601 --> 00:18:58,085 Allegedly! 402 00:18:58,169 --> 00:18:59,608 Hurry up and book her! 403 00:18:59,692 --> 00:19:01,647 We have dinner reservations. 404 00:19:03,087 --> 00:19:04,744 Job fair, huh? 405 00:19:04,828 --> 00:19:06,310 Well, it's fair to say I'll do a great job 406 00:19:06,394 --> 00:19:07,697 wrecking this place. 407 00:19:10,703 --> 00:19:12,534 Jake, what are you doing? 408 00:19:14,402 --> 00:19:15,922 Psst! Over here! 409 00:19:17,841 --> 00:19:20,063 What... Jake? What is going on? 410 00:19:20,147 --> 00:19:23,458 That's not me. That's an evil clone Dad made. 411 00:19:23,542 --> 00:19:25,982 Head's up! 412 00:19:26,066 --> 00:19:29,029 Luckily, I implanted a tracker in him. 413 00:19:29,113 --> 00:19:32,859 And a few other surprises that we won't go into right now. 414 00:19:32,943 --> 00:19:34,338 We have to get everyone out of here! 415 00:19:34,422 --> 00:19:36,993 - On it. - Hartley? I need your help. 416 00:19:37,077 --> 00:19:39,474 That's the alarm. 417 00:19:39,558 --> 00:19:40,729 Come on, everyone! 418 00:19:47,218 --> 00:19:48,526 I'm gonna enjoy this. 419 00:19:48,610 --> 00:19:50,267 Hey, clone! 420 00:19:50,351 --> 00:19:52,835 There's only room for one Jake in this town. 421 00:19:52,919 --> 00:19:54,358 With lines like that, 422 00:19:54,442 --> 00:19:57,231 no wonder he wanted to replace you. 423 00:19:57,315 --> 00:20:00,184 I love this! No matter who wins, Jake loses! 424 00:20:16,551 --> 00:20:19,035 What just happened? 425 00:20:19,119 --> 00:20:21,908 I might have given him ten times your strength. 426 00:20:21,992 --> 00:20:23,692 I'm sorry but what's the point of making a clone 427 00:20:23,776 --> 00:20:25,259 if he isn't fully loaded? 428 00:20:25,343 --> 00:20:27,174 Then how am I supposed to beat him? 429 00:20:27,258 --> 00:20:28,262 Ooh, I know. 430 00:20:28,346 --> 00:20:29,698 Hey, Colby! 431 00:20:32,698 --> 00:20:35,269 Be a dear and distract Bad Jake for us. 432 00:20:35,353 --> 00:20:37,091 On it! 433 00:20:47,104 --> 00:20:49,718 Oh, man! I totally owned that clone! 434 00:20:49,802 --> 00:20:51,676 You know, let's be honest. 435 00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:54,020 I think the fly did most of the heavy lifting. 436 00:21:01,727 --> 00:21:03,297 I'm sorry you didn't get the job, Mom. 437 00:21:03,381 --> 00:21:05,734 Oh, it's okay. 438 00:21:05,818 --> 00:21:07,736 Hey. Thanks to you, I got something better. 439 00:21:07,820 --> 00:21:09,651 Your confidence? 440 00:21:09,735 --> 00:21:11,522 I was gonna say my first face cream brawl, 441 00:21:11,606 --> 00:21:12,778 but, yeah, that works. 442 00:21:15,828 --> 00:21:18,225 Son, I guess you were right. 443 00:21:18,309 --> 00:21:20,488 I should have never made Bad Jake. 444 00:21:20,572 --> 00:21:22,969 Whoa. Is this an apology? 445 00:21:23,053 --> 00:21:25,667 I don't know. I've never done one. 446 00:21:25,751 --> 00:21:27,712 Look, I don't know what happened. 447 00:21:27,796 --> 00:21:29,105 I guess I got a little jealous 448 00:21:29,189 --> 00:21:30,846 when I saw you bonding with Robert. 449 00:21:30,930 --> 00:21:33,109 And it made me miss the old days 450 00:21:33,193 --> 00:21:35,938 and the trouble we used to get into. 451 00:21:36,022 --> 00:21:38,158 So I thought if I could make you jealous, 452 00:21:38,242 --> 00:21:41,378 maybe you'd want to hang out again. 453 00:21:41,462 --> 00:21:44,381 You don't need to make me jealous, you're my dad. 454 00:21:44,465 --> 00:21:46,079 It's just that... 455 00:21:46,163 --> 00:21:47,471 things are a little different now 456 00:21:47,555 --> 00:21:50,387 and we have to find stuff we both like doing. 457 00:21:50,471 --> 00:21:52,520 Hm, okay. Well, if that's the case, 458 00:21:52,604 --> 00:21:53,521 you wanna go make fun of Bad Jake 459 00:21:53,605 --> 00:21:56,132 before I vaporize him? 460 00:21:56,216 --> 00:21:58,346 Well, that's what I call quality time. 461 00:22:00,829 --> 00:22:02,573 How 'bout, "Hey, Bad Jake, 462 00:22:02,657 --> 00:22:04,010 I feel like I'm looking in a mirror. 463 00:22:04,094 --> 00:22:06,186 A broken mirror." 464 00:22:06,270 --> 00:22:09,058 "Hey, Bad Jake. Plagiarize your DNA much?" 465 00:22:10,187 --> 00:22:11,582 Hey, Bad Jake. 466 00:22:11,666 --> 00:22:14,150 Nice smoldering eyes you got there. 467 00:22:14,234 --> 00:22:15,798 Yeah, that felt weird coming out. 468 00:22:19,239 --> 00:22:20,411 Hey. 469 00:22:21,241 --> 00:22:22,593 Bad Jake's gone. 470 00:22:22,677 --> 00:22:24,439 And he took out his tracker. 471 00:22:24,524 --> 00:22:26,150 No worries. I'll just build another Jake 472 00:22:26,235 --> 00:22:27,406 to track him down. 473 00:22:28,587 --> 00:22:29,889 No!34388

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